Veto The Podcast

Veto The Podcast Episode 22 - Ellen Musk Presents

• George Milton, Brent Bobbitt • Season 1 • Episode 22

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0:00 | 1:10:33

The boys strap their Pontiac Firebird to the back of a Cybertruck and head down to the casino where they bet on almost everything and lose.

We're having ourselves a snail wrastlin' good time and saving a bunch of stuff to give to our kids when they're either way older or just a litter older.

It's a fresh ep of Veto The Podcast and we're not tipping any dealers that make us feel bad.

Hit us up at vetothepodcast@gmail.com

SPEAKER_00

The podcast you are about to listen to was made by idiots and will probably make you dumber. Pregnant or nursing women and those with weakened immune systems should turn away immediately. All others, proceed at your own risk and prepare to veto the podcast.

SPEAKER_02

You've got a friend, you've got a friend in me. If I'm looking a friend you need true I hope I have a friend in you, do it a friend in you. I'm feeling okay. I'm pretty good. Alright. And I hope I have a friend in you.

SPEAKER_05

Doing a friend in you do up Guten Tag, and welcome to V2ThePodcast, the podcast where three guys talk about fixing up vintage American muscle cars. I'm your head mechanic and America's funkal, George Milton. My favorite American muscle car has to be the 1967 Chevrolet. I'm joined, as always, by my co-host and muscle car enthusiast, Brent Bobbitt. What's up, Brent?

SPEAKER_06

Um, not much, man. I yeah, as George said, I'm a pretty big enthusiast. I'm planning on seeing a muscle car someday. So yeah. What's your favorite muscle car, Brent? Um, I don't know, probably the deltoids.

SPEAKER_02

Good.

SPEAKER_05

Uh we're also joined today by a very, very special guest. Uh, this dude is an absolute grease monkey. He's a freak uh under the sheets. It's Mr. Johnny King. Welcome, Johnny.

SPEAKER_01

Hey guys, I'm glad to be here. Thanks for inviting me.

SPEAKER_05

Johnny, what's your favorite American muscle car?

SPEAKER_01

My favorite American muscle car is a 1980 Pontiac Firebird.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, hell yeah. A real answer. Not even a funny answer, maybe the right answer. It was my first car. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You just reminded me that I used to have like this mirror uh that I I've I'd probably picked it up at like a thrift shop or flea market or something at some point whenever I was in my early 20s, but it had like this badass firebird on there. And I have not thought about that in forever, and now I'm like, where the hell did that go? Like, I it's not something I would have felt like I would have gotten rid of intentionally. So it's uh I wonder where the hell that firebird mirror was.

SPEAKER_05

Dude, I really I really wanted a firebird. Like when I was high school age, I really wanted a firebird, and then there was a police station like near my house, and I would drive by and their and like their impound lot at one point had this white firebird, probably early 80s firebird, and I saw it sitting there for a couple of months, and I went in and I was like, Hey, can I have that firebird here? And they were like, No, that's uh you know, like it's evidence or whatever. Anyway, I was I was back home and I drove past that police station. That fucking firebird is still there, it's all rusted out and stuff. But they could have just given it to me. They should have given it to me.

SPEAKER_01

Man, that's wrong.

SPEAKER_05

What'd you guys do this weekend? Did y'all play music?

SPEAKER_06

Uh yeah. We did a little bit, but I was off last night, which is unusual for a Saturday. But you know, it's good a day as any to make bad decisions. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Off on a Saturday.

SPEAKER_01

I played music Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.

SPEAKER_06

Cool, man. Was that in Florida or did you go back to the old CA for that?

SPEAKER_01

I was in Florida. Okay. That's good. That's good. Good time.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, man. I really enjoyed the Florida man segment from last week.

SPEAKER_06

Man, uh, and speaking of which, uh surely you guys saw the big Florida woman news coming out of the Florida this week, no? What was the Florida Woman news? Florida woman in a jacked-up four by four truck runs over a Ferrari in the parking lot because she didn't see it.

SPEAKER_04

Like down below her.

SPEAKER_06

She rolled over it like a monster truck and like stopped when she realized it was there. There's pictures all over the place. Yeah. A woman crushed a you know,$200,000 car on accident on accident because she did not see it in the parking lot in front of her.

SPEAKER_01

That's funny. You know what's funny about that is I saw it, but I didn't even imagine that like it would be like anybody else would see it. I felt like it was just like local. That was natural as hell. It just felt like like Ho Home, just another day in Florida.

SPEAKER_05

Just another day in Florida.

SPEAKER_01

I didn't even read the article. I'm just like, yeah, that tracks.

SPEAKER_05

That's straight. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know, I mean, and I don't know, like, not to not to try to platform anything, but I I would love it if people could. I mean I'm not like I'm totally happy with the things people use pickup trucks as vehicles. Not like I'm trying to ban pickup trucks, but I maybe there could be a conversation had about the legalities of jacking it up so much that it's just clearly unsafe for anything you would run into or run over in this case. Like maybe nobody needs to have uh you know a floorboard that is six feet off the ground.

SPEAKER_05

Brent Bobbitt hates pickup trucks in America.

SPEAKER_01

Well, they they make up they make up for it for that by being extra loud, so right.

SPEAKER_06

Well, and they politely usually tend to be the ones to drop black smoke and roll coal all over people, too. So it's yeah, all over my Tesla.

SPEAKER_05

For my brand new Tesla. I just washed this thing, you guys. Did you drive a Tesla, Johnny? Is that right?

SPEAKER_01

Well, yeah. Technically it technically it's it's uh my wife's car, but I drive it.

SPEAKER_06

Um yeah.

SPEAKER_01

As long as it's not a cyber truck, I won't think less of you. It's so funny. It's like, all right, it's the same same make, but then you have man in California people are you know putting their bumper stickers everywhere. Like, I'm not a fan. Yeah, I love the car, it's a great car. At least it's not a cyber truck.

SPEAKER_05

There's a lot I've seen a lot of the I've seen a lot of the bumper stickers in Austin on Teslas that are like, I bought this Tesla before Elon went crazy, whatever.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Uh yeah. I don't know. I would like I would never buy a cyber truck, but if somebody gave me a cyber truck, I don't think I'd sell it. I'd drive it.

SPEAKER_06

I'd have to sell like have you ever been on the highway behind one? Like at the right angle, it literally looks like a dumpster rolling down the road at 70 miles an hour. It's crazy.

SPEAKER_05

And 90% of the angles are the right angle for it to look like a dumpster. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And then you have uh, I don't know, a lot so many things in my life where like first time I see something, I think, oh my god, that's so ugly. And then you kind of get used to it, and it kind of grows on you. I set Cybertruck, I never. I mean, the the best anything, every now and then somebody will have something cool, like in the like the paint or something will look cool. I'm like, all right, well, that was alright, but man, I just can't get used to it to looking at it. It's it's and there's a lot of them out here.

SPEAKER_05

It offends my eyes whenever I see one. There's a lot of them out here too. Like there's one that's gotta live pretty close to where I live. There's like one black, like all black cyber truck that I see pretty frequently.

SPEAKER_06

Well, what's funny about that is you know that they're not even I mean, you probably know this already, but like none of those are I say none, the vast majority at least are not even painted. It's it's you know, wraps that they put on those things to make them appear to be something besides stainless steel.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

I don't know. I I don't hate the cyber truck as much as I used to. That's maybe my hottest my hottest take about it. I would never I would never pay, I would never pay that much money. If I had that much money to spend on a car, I wouldn't spend it on a cyber truck. But I'd drive it like if I if I won one in a contest, I wouldn't sell it and buy something else. I'd yeah, I would.

SPEAKER_06

I think people would be just like mean to me all the time driving around. Like there's so many people that just because of that vehicle are gonna be like like you'll probably I bet people that drive uh cyber trucks probably get a middle finger every once in a while that they're not really sure why. And it's like sure what is just they know why they knew what they were getting into.

SPEAKER_01

That's that's why they bought it.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, because they were like, hey, like, fuck you. I don't care that this looks like a I mean, we all know that it looks like a five-year-old drawing of a five-year-old's drawing of a truck, but they don't care, man. They're on the bleeding edge.

SPEAKER_06

So people, the point that we're really making here for those of you listening is that there's an argument to be made that the cyber truck might be the best American muscle car. The cyber truck is it's core America, you guys.

SPEAKER_05

And now to our sponsor, not our cyber truck. Not like nothing else from Tesla. It's not Tesla, we're not sponsored by Tesla, we're sponsored by Cybertruck. Just the Cybertruck. Just the Cybertruck. And just the one Cybertruck that's like in my neighborhood, just that one cyber truck that lives in my neighborhood. Uh speaking of my neighborhood, uh, I helped a I helped a guy move yesterday. When was the last time you guys helped somebody move? Because I did it yesterday. That was my weekend.

SPEAKER_06

Well, I'll answer your question, but then I have a follow-up question for you about that because my answer to it would be like not that that long ago, but my role is different whenever I'm helping someone move than it used to be. Like, whenever I was in my early 20s, um, I think most of my friends know me as being a person. Yeah, totally. Yeah, I'm super, super buff. But uh, I would always be the first there to like be on and help the heavy lifting of things. And but now, like, it's like I don't mind helping someone move. But my one rule is like, I don't team lift heavy objects with you because people aren't careful enough with that. And usually when you're team lifting something heavy, the first thing that gets happened that happens if you're gonna hurt something is your hand gets slammed into there. And like, I'm not gonna go help somebody move to potentially risk me being out of work for weeks. It's like even if I sound like a pussy doing that, I'm not helping you move heavy shit. I like that's what movers are for. I'll buy movers for you. I'm just not gonna help like lift your table up as we finagle it around this corner and pivot and hopefully don't get my hand smashed in it whenever we're there.

SPEAKER_05

What if they buy you pizza?

SPEAKER_06

That's kind of standard though, isn't it? I mean, pizza is just for me showing up. That doesn't pizza's just for showing up. Yeah, you earn the beers based on the heavy lifting that you do. So I'll just have the pizza and not any beers.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. So I will tell you, I hate moving more than anything. And so even I feel like for the last 20 years or whatever, every time we move, I'm like, I'm not moving. We'll pay pay movers. I don't want to pack, I don't want to do any of that.

SPEAKER_05

So you get you have movers pack too?

SPEAKER_01

Yep. I do. I I just the whole thing. Packing is the worst part of packing is the worst part of moving. It's just so stressful. So if a friend asked me to help them move, I would come across like a total asshole because I would say, I hate moving so much. You don't even do it for yourself. Can I just give you five hundred dollars to pay somebody else? Just start away. I would literally rather give a friend$500 to hire somebody to help them for than for me to make it.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, no, that's what I was saying about the heavy stuff. Like, I'll I'll show up and like move a couple little things for you. But if you're if we're talking about moving an apartment, like I'm happy to fund some moving expenses for you, but I'm not I'm not lifting that shit.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Wow. How did it go for you, George?

SPEAKER_05

It was fine. Uh I will I will say that the it was mostly pretty light furniture. Like even the uh we didn't have to move. So I will say, as a little background, I I spent a little time when I was younger working for two men in a truck.

SPEAKER_01

Ah, the tracks. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

And that was a job that I quit. Like, like uh we got hired for all sorts of stuff. It was mostly like it was mostly like single family residence, like somebody was moving from a house to an apartment, or apartment to a house, or a house to another house. So it was mostly like how big of a house, how many bedrooms is it? Um and I remember that there was a there was there was this one guy that like you we had to call this one guy, I didn't remember the guy's name, but he was like a college football player. Dude was probably 280, like pure muscle, and they would call him when they had to m move like weird large stuff. Like I remember one time that they had we had to we got hired to move a piano, like a grand piano, down three floors. They had their grand piano on the third floor. Criminal.

SPEAKER_01

Criminal straight, straight to the jail.

SPEAKER_06

But in their defense, like you're not yeah, in their defense, I can see why they contracted movers to be able to do that. Why they bought movers, but even the movers are even the movers are like we're making twelve dollars an hour, like plus that's interesting that you were on the two men in a truck crew. I would have pictured you back in the day as more of a college hunks moving junk kind of guy, you know?

SPEAKER_05

We didn't have oh thank hey, thanks, Brent. But we didn't we didn't have one of those in Birmingham. It was all two men in a truck. But like, uh, dude, I remember we had a um we had to move an office one time. Like instead of instead of hiring like a group that specifically does like office moves, they hired a bunch of two men in a truck crews, so like, you know, 16 men in eight trucks or whatever. And and we were just moving all this office furniture, and like the way that that job worked was like you would get up in the morning and at five o'clock you would call this phone number, and it was like a they would leave an outgo, they would have like the outgoing voicemail message that would say, you know, here's the two men cruise, and here's what time the jobs are. So like the day before, like it was Tuesday night. I don't know what I'm doing on Wednesday. I might not have anything till 1 p.m. But I gotta get up and call the like line at five in the morning.

SPEAKER_04

Oof.

SPEAKER_05

And so like we we did this we did this office move, and it took like a week and a half, and we were there till like 10, 11 p.m. every day, just moving giant filing cabinets and giant like office furniture. And this was like, you know, in the early 2000s, before office furniture was like really sleek. It was all just this big hulking stuff. And then we did we finished this move, uh, and and I remember just like having like I went after this job, like it was like 11 12 p.m. you know, like at night, and I just went to the I went to the gas station and got like a six six pack of beer and drove to my apartment and just drank like half of it just in the parking lot, just in my car. Cause I like that's I was just beat. And then I got up at five and listened to the thing, and they had me on a job that I had to be at at six, and I just call I just like left a message and I was like, hey, I quit, by the way.

SPEAKER_01

I quit this job. Too much.

SPEAKER_05

I quit this job. Good luck. Anyway, we didn't have to pack anything. Packing was the worst. Like getting hired to pack was like my least favorite thing when somebody was like, Can you pack my kitchen? I was like, ah fuck.

SPEAKER_06

No, that's also Johnny's f least favorite thing, so you guys should be.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's awful.

SPEAKER_05

I but it was always the places that we got hired to pack were always the places that were like the worst to pack because it was somebody who looked at their kitchen and they were like, fuck, I don't know. Nope. Yeah, this is my stuff, and I've got no idea. It's my stuff.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. I think the only bad thing about that is like if you're having someone do all your packing for you, then usually I would look at moving as like the only real benefit of it as that it gives you an opportunity to kind of sort through all your stuff definitively and be like, okay, but you would say that, you neat tidy.

SPEAKER_01

I guess you do the opportunity.

SPEAKER_06

Again, we've been in this place for uh in in a couple months, it's gonna be 11 years that I've been in this place. So like I I have not I've not moved much in the last while.

SPEAKER_05

I've never the longest we lived anywhere is our last place was 10 years, and that was a long that was a pretty long time. It is uh it's it's pretty hard to live somewhere that long and not just have it turn into like a clusterfuck. Like you have to you have to spring clean every year.

SPEAKER_01

Which is spring clean instead instead of spring cleaning, I'd rather just move every every year. Hire somebody to to pack up my shit, bring it somewhere else.

SPEAKER_06

But you're but you're not doing it because then they're bringing all your shit over to the new place.

SPEAKER_01

But then it's in boxes. You don't have to clean it if it's in boxes.

SPEAKER_05

We should start a moving company that the that does the service of like we will move, but the only the 80% of your best 80% of stuff is gonna make the move, and we'll decide what it is.

SPEAKER_06

Let's also talk about pack your own shit movers. We cause we don't want to do that part. Pack your own shit. Or if you do contract us to do the moving and you need it packed, we will subcontract yet another company to come do the packing. To come do the packing.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. Yeah. And that then that company will subcontract a company and so on and so forth.

SPEAKER_01

And they'll sub subcontract a company to get your nesting doll situation of packing companies.

SPEAKER_06

It's packing companies all the way down.

SPEAKER_01

The subcontractor that does grand pianos from third floors.

SPEAKER_05

And that's all they do. Oh, they're sitting around for a lot of the year. I remember, I remember like the last one that I saw that guy do. It was like uh, and he would get paid extra for it, but like not a lot extra. I mean, this dude was maybe making, you know, 25 years ago, he was maybe making like$20 an hour. And I remember I have like it's burned into my memory this third floor like piano move that we did, and this dude's got the piano, and he's like going down the stairs, and it's like a it's it's uh not a spiral staircase, but it's like a residential staircase where it like goes down and there's a landing and it comes back, so you gotta like turn it around. And he was like on the bottom, like trying to turn around, and he's like he's like crushed against the wall.

SPEAKER_01

Oh god.

SPEAKER_05

You know, so he didn't hurt his hand, but I was just like we're all like around trying to figure out where we can get in and help, and I'm just like watching this, and he's like crushed against the wall, and I'm like, man, for twenty dollars an hour, it just like this is I not that there's other way, not that there's a ton of other ways at that point to like make twenty dollars an hour, but like it just like it's not gonna cover him dying under a piano.

SPEAKER_01

Like at least thirty four.

SPEAKER_05

It's not twenty, is what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah. And like good pizza too.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, good pizza. Well, we didn't get pizza, we had to buy our own pizza. That's what the money's for. We had to buy our own pizza.

SPEAKER_06

I would have expected if you work on a moving company, you're just it's like free pizza every day. Just beer and pizzas. Beer and pizza pizza. Company lunch.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. We should. People didn't even tip, I bet.

SPEAKER_05

Uh I think those people tipped. They tipped him, which is good. He deserved it. Yeah, but I hope he's okay.

SPEAKER_06

I'm I'm gonna be absolutely serious right now. Are you supposed to tip movers?

SPEAKER_00

Yes.

SPEAKER_05

Uh yeah. I think you're supposed to Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. Well, Brent, I'm glad you haven't moved for the last 11 years. Yeah. It's been 11 years since Brent's been a real elevator. Since I've stiffed a mover, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, and all of my defense are moving guys, whenever we moved over here, the worst experience of moving history. They so in the building, because there's a high rise here, and so you have to reserve an elevator. There's one cargo elevator, two non-cargo elevators, but you can only reserve cargo elevators for move-ins between certain hours. Let's say it was between like, you know, 10 to 5 or something like that. But I told them they were supposed to be here at like, I don't know, two. And these motherfuckers showed up like three and a half hours late. So we were beyond the point of what they could shut down the elevators for because it's like rush hour and people gotta come in. So then they showed up super late. I had to help them with the move because they were like behind schedule, and somehow that was my fault at that point or my problem anyway. So I'm having to like help them move things that I paid them to move while negotiating turns in and out of like the regular elevator because we couldn't always use the cargo elevator anymore. We just had to like wait our turn with the rest of the six o'clock rush hour, you know, building rush coming in. So uh yeah, man, that that's I so even if I would have known that I was supposed to have tipped them, there's no way I would have tipped them anything at all. Uh now that I know that I was was supposed to tip movers, good. Yeah, glad these assholes are. That's right. Yeah, now I made my point more than I've been doing.

SPEAKER_01

Man, 11 years of simmering justification.

SPEAKER_06

You gotta know. But what's a tip for in that? Because like I, you know, I know tipping culture in America has gotten out of control anyway, but like, what I'm why am I tipping a move? I paid them to do a job, they did that job, and I'm giving them more because they did a really good job at moving things from point A to point. That's ridiculous. I mean, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of tipping for.

SPEAKER_05

But there's a lot of things that I mean, like, if you go get now, I don't get my hair cut anymore, but if you go get your hair cut, like you could tip the Yeah, but that I can kind of get.

SPEAKER_06

I don't really necessarily agree with it, but it's just it's commonplace enough. I mean, but like I I I went and uh you know we we bought a we bought a new car the other day and we had a uh a pretty young car dealer that was talking with us. I didn't tip him when we left the car dealership. Was I supposed to tip?

SPEAKER_05

I don't think I think you tip him by buying the car.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, I thought I tipped the moving people by fing and moving. But uh who knows? Yeah. It's crazy wild smells.

SPEAKER_05

I don't know. It is it is complicated to let me hand you guys these veto cards. I forgot to do that. Uh they're nested veto cards. So it's only it looks like one veto card, but if you put the other ones inside. The other ones inside. Uh don't open the second one though, because the only thing inside that is nothing. And you'll have a ripped up veto card.

SPEAKER_01

It's not veto cards all the way down.

SPEAKER_05

It is veto cards all the way down. It's just there's just two layers deep. Um okay. Uh let's go to the dice of destiny because uh we got some real we got some real beefy show to do. Uh I just rolled it, but I realized we didn't assign it was a one. It was a one in case you were wondering. It's George. We're being goofy. Okay. Uh I'll be one and two. Uh Brent will be three and four. Johnny King will be five and six. Right. Oh, that's a five. That's Johnny King.

SPEAKER_01

All right. So I'm so I'm curious about you guys. So do you guys are you into gambling? Like, do you like going to casinos or or or even the online scene?

SPEAKER_06

I'm not, I'm not like a big gambler. Like, I'm more of the guy that if I'm going to the casino, I might walk in with like a couple hundred bucks and don't plan on keeping it. But if I run out of that, I'm not gonna like go back and get more, you know, and just like oh okay, I'm lost my money.

SPEAKER_05

I don't really like table games. I like to go play like a poker tournament or something. Yeah, but yeah.

SPEAKER_06

See, I like table table games, but not I don't like the things that are just sheer luck. Like I'm not gonna go play slots, I'd rather s have at least the illusion of control. Yeah, I like blackjack or something.

SPEAKER_05

I like blackjack because you get some cards and it's fun to play with friends.

SPEAKER_01

But yeah. So I'm I'm like y'all too. I'm kind of casual. I like it as a uh kind of a social thing, but I now that like with uh uh basketball playoffs and stuff, I noticed you know all the sports betting and just and then you've got the all different betting markets and uh the polymarket thing. Yeah, the poly market. So so I I looked up a bunch of uh like weird stuff that people are are can bet on. Okay, love and race. Yeah, poly market or culchi. And so we're gonna play a game of uh I'm gonna give you three examples of things that have been bet on. Yeah. And one of them is gonna be fake. Okay. So we're gonna have to I like these games where where we got a winner or a loser.

SPEAKER_05

Two truth isn't a lie? Yeah. Yes. Uh we we call this we call this segment from now on, we've got our we've got a loser.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Here can I uh this is a little aside, but last week after or after we were done on our last one, I felt bad for calling George a loser so many times. Hey, hey, I shouldn't have. I thought I might have overdone it. He lost sleep over it.

SPEAKER_05

I was a loser. I was a loser.

SPEAKER_06

You know.

SPEAKER_01

So the so that was fun.

unknown

All right.

SPEAKER_06

George can take being called a loser that many times. I cannot. I'll pretend like I'm okay and I'll be crying the rest of the day after we get off this.

SPEAKER_01

Crying and seething at whoever's gonna be. Absolutely seething. Alright, so I'm gonna give you three. One of them is gonna be fake. Y'all pick the fake one, alright? Alright, so first round. Uh people, you could bet on the color of the Gatorade that would be dumped on the Super Bowl coach.

SPEAKER_06

Why would you bet on that? It's gonna be blue. It's always blue.

SPEAKER_01

Well then you can you could bet on red and have you know, you might you have better odds or worse odds and a better payoff. So, or uh whether a streaker will appear during a World Cup match. Or C the exact minute a player will sneeze during the NBA finals. Which one of those is the fake one? Any player would sneeze or a any player like on the bench or in the game, probably on the bench.

SPEAKER_06

I'll knee-jerk throw that. That's gonna be my pick. I'll take first pick. I think it's the uh sneezing one. The other one seemed a little more realistic to me.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, color of gatory. Uh I know that we're allowed to pick the same one, so I'm gonna pick the same one. Do it a sneezer.

SPEAKER_01

All right. The sneezing. We we have a we have a winner. We have no loser.

SPEAKER_05

No losers.

SPEAKER_01

No losers.

SPEAKER_05

As an aside, Brent, it's just a quick aside. It's just a quick aside. Did you know that you're supposed to tip the dealer at a casino?

SPEAKER_06

Okay, that one I did know, yeah. And I have no problem doing that.

SPEAKER_01

Do you tip them if you lose?

SPEAKER_06

Like, I'll usually I will it it kind of depends on how fast it goes away. I mean, though. Like if it just goes real quick, then oh well. You know, but like if I've been slowly working my way down and I get to the bottom of it and I'm just left with like my last like you know,$20 chip or something, I'll be like, yeah, you know, it's been fun, I'll like throw that to the dealer and that'll be my that'll be my exit. But uh I've been known not to before, but typically I'm gonna tip a dealer.

SPEAKER_05

Good.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

So you can vote on the on the color of Gatorade.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. But it's blue. But it's blue. I didn't actually look up what what it ended up being, but alright.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I'd love to know what the uh what the stack of the odds are on that uh thing. Like is obviously they've tracked it over the years. So I'd I'd love to see like sort of the the pie chart of like what colors have been most represented at the Super Bowl. That's fine. I bet it's blue. It's gotta be either blue or yellow, right?

SPEAKER_01

I mean it's gotta be red is a pretty good one.

unknown

Is it?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, red's my favorite. I would bet red.

SPEAKER_06

I like the red too. I just feel like that's not as much of the like community color. I feel like when you see a bulk of Gatorade that was made by putting powder in and then stirring a bunch of water, it seems like it's always blue or yellow to me. Or orange. Yeah, I feel like when I got Gatorade on the bottom, I've never seen orange in that in that big I I've only ever seen orange in the individuals.

SPEAKER_05

Wow, I'm sure it exists. I just this is why it's a good thing to bet on.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, I know. We're at and yellow, it's like dumping a big bucket of R. Kelly all over the coach. All right, we're ready for our next one. So first choice is who will win the Cooper's Hill cheese rolling race in England? Or uh you can bet on the outcome of the World Snail Racing Championship.

SPEAKER_05

For sure.

SPEAKER_01

Or you could bet on the winner of the annual International Tow Wrestling Championship.

SPEAKER_06

Who? Okay, I I jumped in first last time, George. I'm gonna let you take Chris for the easy one.

SPEAKER_05

I feel like I see a lot of I feel like I see a lot of like content around that downhill cheese rolling, whatever contest. I'm gonna go snail racing. Snail racing.

SPEAKER_06

All right. Uh and then the last one was what again?

SPEAKER_01

It's the winner of the annual international toe wrestling championship.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, okay. I'm gonna pick that one because never in my life have I ever heard of a toe wrestling championship. And furthermore, I don't even know how that would be done. Like thumb wrestling, that makes sense. I get it. But toe, like, how do you even win a toe wrestling match? Do you pin the other person's toes with your toes? Is it like thumb wrestling? But you're and do you interlock something or are they just facing off against each other like two sumo wrestlers on a mini circle? I don't know. I'm picking toe wrestling, I don't think it's real.

SPEAKER_01

See, I thought about looking into that because I also had that same question of like toe wrestling. What would that be? And I was afraid that if I did, I I'd I'd be afraid to Google search toe wrestling.

SPEAKER_05

Your algorithm for the porn would be all right. You gotta go in the uh what is it, incognito mode.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it would take me to some dark places. All right, so good news. We have at least one loser. Yes. So congratulations. And the loser is on this round is Brent. But that's right.

SPEAKER_05

Toe wrestling is a real thing. And you can bet all.

SPEAKER_06

See, the one thing that was drawing me to the snail one that you were saying is that it had the word world in it. And like, I don't know that you could get people to take it that seriously. Do I imagine there to be snail racing at like some local pubs that draws people in to have extra drinks on a Wednesday? Yeah, that's that's a thing.

SPEAKER_01

So, Brent, if you had a bar and you were having snail racing, wrestling in your local snail wrestling? Yeah, snail race. It's a race where you wrestle.

SPEAKER_05

Racing.

SPEAKER_01

We're we're racing. We're wrestling. Oh, look at those snails. Oh, the snails, them snails is racing. They're racing. So no, if you were having that at your little bar, what would you call it? You would call it the world snail wrestling. Wrestling. Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_06

You know, you're like whatever. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? There's no regionals. Yeah, like you can also, no matter what your restaurant even serves, I could be a pizza shop that doesn't sell coffee. I could put a sign on the outside that said world's best coffee. No regulations. Uh yeah.

SPEAKER_01

You did it. What was it? You did it. Congratulations. All right. So next round. Which one of these is fake? Whether a mega quake quake 8.5 plus will hit before the end of 2026, or whether Elon Musk will tweet about Dogecoin this year, or whether the New York Stock Exchange will close early due to a solar flare.

SPEAKER_06

Brent, this one's you. I think this is this has got to be the hardest one so far. Um okay, so hit me with them one more time because I think I'm conflating two things.

SPEAKER_01

First one is if there will be a mega quake 8.5 before 2026. Then we have whether or not Ellen Elon Musk will tweet about Dogecoin this year. Or whether the the New York Stock Exchange will close early due to Solar Flare.

SPEAKER_06

Oh man, I guess I'm gonna have to pick the Solar Flare thing because like I understand the I don't know, but then again, like I'm I'm almost picking it based on what I think the lowest odds of one of those things are, and like that's not a good way to make the selection of this game, you know. But um, I don't know, I'm almost drawn to the second one because uh you can't tweet anymore. That's not even a thing. You have to I don't know, it's X now. What do they call it anymore? Jiz? Do you z now instead of Jiz instead of tweet?

SPEAKER_01

Jiz all over the internet.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. So I I don't I don't really I don't know. Um I guess I'll pick the third one. I'll pick the third one.

SPEAKER_01

All right, go on third one.

SPEAKER_05

Okay. Uh I'm gonna pick the second one, uh, and I'll tell you why, because I think that I think that some pretty heavy collusion could happen there. The other two are almost like acts of God. And the I also I'm gonna use one veto card to veto the correct saying of what is now Ellen Musk. It's gonna be Ellen Musk. Ellen Musk. When you said Ellen, I think it's Ellen now.

SPEAKER_06

You know what's funny? I don't even flag that anymore because whenever like with all the the Portuguese stuff I'm doing, that's how Brazilians pronounce it is Ellen.

SPEAKER_05

Ellen? Yeah. Okay. Well, guess what, guys? We're vetoing the other pronunciation of it. It's Ellen Musk now. All right.

SPEAKER_06

All right, and that's the one I'm gonna do. Oh yeah, we gotta let him know.

SPEAKER_05

I'll just I'll I'll I'll jizz at him and tell him. Yeah, send him a send him a jizz. I'll send him a jizz.

SPEAKER_01

Alright. Just just google toe toe wrestling first. Turn our algorithms are gonna be wild. I already did.

SPEAKER_05

I already did. I actually Googled it yesterday, so weird.

SPEAKER_01

Alright. So the answer is the fake one. We have a loser. And this time, George is the loser. I'm the loser. You're the loser, George. Damn. Yes. The fake one was that the New York Stock Exchange would close early due to a solar flare. Okay. Alright, you're ready for the next one.

SPEAKER_06

If that was a bet, man, I can't imagine the astronomical odds that that would have to have placed on it because no pun intended, but the um like the solar flare thing, not to say that it couldn't cause something like that, but if if if it causes the New York Stock Exchange to shut down, we've got bigger problems than just the New York Stock Exchange. You know what I'm saying? So uh anyway, but continue.

SPEAKER_05

No, dude, it's the economy, it's all about the GDP dog.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah. Alright, so you let's do this. This will be our our I our final round. Let's call sudden death. Let's take a tiebreaker. Picking a loser. If you both choose the right answer or the the correct wrong answer, then I'll have one more. We can do a tiebreaker. So if you want to choose the the same one, you can.

SPEAKER_05

No, we're not gonna choose the same one. Not on a tie not on the tiebreaker round.

SPEAKER_01

Alright, you ready? Well, this is not necessarily the type it can't. We can do one more if you want. It's up to y'all. Alright. So whether aliens will be officially confirmed to exist by year's end, or which country will be first to officially acknowledge UFO contact? Or whether a sitting US senator will publicly claim alien abduction.

SPEAKER_06

Bad news. I need you to hit me with those one more time because like my internet was doing something weird and I couldn't even catch most of what you were saying.

SPEAKER_01

That's great news. Alright, you ready? So uh first one is whether aliens will be officially confirmed to exist by the end of the year, or whether uh which country will be the first to officially acknowledge UFO contact, or whether a sitting U.S. senator will publicly claim alien abduction.

SPEAKER_05

Who's picking it first this time? Yeah, I think Jersey. I'm gonna lock in on A. I think it's a little a little uh a little vague.

SPEAKER_06

Man, see that's the one I was gonna pick too, only because I feel like for a good polymarket bet, you need something that's not so completely open-ended. This one, yeah, as of so far in history, no countries have yet, you know, made that announcement of public contact. So if you're waiting on the first one, the first one that hypothetically might never happen. So if you've placed that polymarket bet, how like are you just you're just gonna let it ride there for the rest of forever? Like so I gotta pick that one too. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01

I think they give it, I think they give it time horizons of it. But so y'all want to pick pick A? Breaking the same.

SPEAKER_06

What was the last one again? Maybe I'll change it up just so we can because the last one sounded good to me too.

SPEAKER_01

All right, the last one was whether a sitting U.S. senator will publicly claim alien abduction.

SPEAKER_06

You know what? I'm gonna go ahead and pick that one because like I could see a case for that one too, because like why, why I mean a U.S. senator, like as opposed to fucking anybody? Like, I'll pick the senator one. Yeah, that seems plausible enough to me that I don't think I need to jump on the same one to guarantee another round. Let's let's let's put a I'll I'll take the risk here. I'm gonna move my answer.

SPEAKER_01

You're gonna take the risk. Okay. Thanks to a late change of heart, we now have a loser. So I would like to congratulate the loser of our game is George Milton. Gotcha, bitch.

SPEAKER_05

You did. I thought you thought for sure you were gonna say Brent. Yeah, there was a polymarket for that. I would have bet Brent.

SPEAKER_01

That's funny because when I when I was reading them, I was like, oh man, I feel like that the senator one is just so outlandish. I felt like it was gonna be easy. Yeah. And then you got me. And then I started thinking about some of the senators that we have, and I'm like, no, I could see it, I could see Tommy Tubberville saying something like that.

SPEAKER_05

I could see it. Congratulations, George. I'm not gonna lose. I'm not gonna tip our dealer because he made me feel bad.

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_05

Alright, guys, we're gonna take a quick let's take a quick break. Uh we'll be right back. We're gonna go tune up our muscle cars and drink a coffee. Stick with us! Welcome back. Uh I took the break to uh change the oil in my cyber truck, and I made myself a little coffee.

SPEAKER_01

I unpacked one of my boxes. Oh yeah, from your last room.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Good. What was in it?

SPEAKER_01

Uh a bunch of knickknacks and old old uh old report cards from when I was in elementary school. Cool. I gotta I gotta remind myself that I play with it.

SPEAKER_06

Do you have a box of like sh like shit like that from your childhood? Like, does that exist for you guys? Do you have like? I do. My my mom saved a bunch of shit uh like kind of throughout my life, and it it was maybe like seven years ago that she just like came over and she has this big like plastic storage container, and she's like, Oh, here you go. I'm like, the hell is this? And I started like looking through and I'm like, oh my god, it's just like all kinds of shit from my childhood into the hill.

SPEAKER_05

The old drop off. That's a thing that parents do. I don't know, Johnny. Are you guys teeing up to do that at some point? Where like when they're when they're like 28 or 30 or something like that, where you're like, here's all your shit that I that you didn't know I had, but I've been moving around for the last 15 years.

SPEAKER_01

I 100% do have that. And I didn't know that was something that other people did. I just thought it was just something I enjoyed, you know, getting as an adult, like going through old old stuff like that, so I I've kept stuff for my kids. Don't tell them though.

SPEAKER_05

I'm gonna wait till they're I don't I hardly ever talk to your kids, Johnny.

SPEAKER_01

You're talking to them right now. They they're they're they they listen to every podcast.

SPEAKER_05

Great. Hey Johnny's kids. He's got some stuff for you. And then you'll get it in like 12 years. Uh okay, let's go to the dice of destiny. I'm the loser for our last game and for last week. And that's really good because I was feeling really confident I needed to be brought down a peg before getting into my week. Uh one, two, and six will be me. Three, four, and five will be Brent. Uh, that's one. That's me. That's you. I'm the loser. You're not a loser anymore. I'm the winner now. Uh suck, bitch. Uh, we're gonna go to Reddit to give some people some advice. Because that's what I really want to do. Um he paid for dinner, then ghosted me because I disagreed with his Harry Potter take. Am I crazy or is that a red flag? Uh here's uh I'll read it, but that's a red flag. Um I th I 30F matched with this guy 30M on hinge last year, but we never met. I ended up taking a break from dating, deleted my account, and recently made a new one. He immediately reached out again after he saw my new profile. We actually ended up meeting two weeks ago, and to be fair, he was nice and paid for my dinner, but the entire time the conversation felt really one-sided. He talked a lot about himself, his daily 4 a.m. workouts, protein shakes, his 6'3 height, and went on and on about Harry Potter, Marvel, and superhero movies, like very passionate, but also kind of intense. Which I would argue is what passionate means, but okay. He mentioned traveling to Japan and Korea in the last two years, and when I brought up that I have family in Shanghai and go back to China every year, he didn't ask me a single question about it, just kept talking about his own trips and even showed me photos of noodle dishes he ordered, which I've eaten a million times. I've also been to Japan. Looking back, he learned basically nothing about me besides my Harry Potter opinions. He didn't seem interested in talking about anything outside of superheroes slash Harry Potter. It's weird because he works in finance, so it's not like he's a dud or can't hold a normal conversation.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, finance guys are known for their personalities.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, we've got I'm piecing together all the details we have about this guy. Yeah, I hate this guy. After Hold on, I'll reserve your judgment. After the date, he texted again and recommended I listen to the new Harry Potter full cast version on Audible. He's been obsessed, and I told him I've always loved the Jim Dale audiobooks, but I honestly ended up hating the full cast version because of all the background noise. After I said that, he left me on read. It's been a week. So now I'm like, did I really just get soft ghosted for disagreeing with him, or is this just who he is? Only interested if you're aligned with him and his interests. Any advice would help.

SPEAKER_06

Um this is another one of those where it's really funny that someone like made a post over it. Like usually you would just chuck it up to like, okay, that wasn't a good first date. No reason to keep continuing that. I had a bad time. He just talked about the things he wanted to talk about, and yeah, then you just don't have a second date. I I don't really don't know why you make an internet case over this in the first place, but uh let me go ahead and give the advice. I'd Don't worry about it. He's he he ghosted you? Are you kidding? You really want uh you're that concerned with getting him back on the hook? Like, let it go.

SPEAKER_05

I don't know if you I don't know if you heard though. Like let me list this guy's qualifications real quick. 6'3. 6'3. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

What else do you need to know? What else do you need to know?

SPEAKER_05

There you go. That's that's enough.

SPEAKER_01

He's a finance bro.

SPEAKER_05

Finance bro works. Yeah. He likes Harry Potter and Marvel. Yeah. I think that um maybe listen to the full cast recording. You know? Yeah. What's your whole deal?

SPEAKER_01

I think the worst. I hate those.

SPEAKER_05

Are they?

SPEAKER_01

They are. I don't I don't like an audiobook that's acted out. Jim Dale, give me Jim Dale every day.

SPEAKER_05

Take Jim Dale to you.

SPEAKER_06

And who's that? That's the original, like the the main Harry Potter narrator guy on those audiobooks.

SPEAKER_05

He's like an audiobook guy. I mean, I know he's on more.

SPEAKER_06

They have two versions.

SPEAKER_01

They have Jim Dale, and I think the other guy's maybe Stephen Fry or something like that.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, I know Stephen Fry. So yeah, no, then I heard the Jim Dale version back in the day then.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. That's the best one. I love it.

SPEAKER_05

I do, I also don't like an audio. Like I do, Johnny, we were just like on the break talking about uh podcasts like like fiction podcasts. I do like some of the newer, like uh there's one called The Truth that's like that's like fiction and they they do it like a radio play, but I don't I wouldn't want I would I would I like somebody reading a book to me just like one person reading the book like it's story time me too uh I think you need I think you need to go on another date with this guy. But she can't he go on her and call her back, so how's she gonna go on another date? No, I know what I'm saying is I think she needs to engineer it. Like she clearly knows how to set the hook for him. Yeah. I think set the hook for this guy.

SPEAKER_06

So what do you say? Reply back and be like, hey, I retract my opinion. I just listen to it and oh my gosh, best audiobook experience I've ever had in my life, and then he's right back in. Is that the thing? Yeah, I just yes, absolutely.

SPEAKER_01

And like she could ghost his ass.

SPEAKER_05

That she could ghost him. Yeah. What I'm saying is like, you you you're on my wavelengths, Johnny. I I want to turn it, I want to turn it to where he's so interested because she just sets the hook. She know, like, I can tell by reading her post, she's like, these are the things he's interested in. Okay. Like cue that up for him, you know? And ask him to talk about himself. And when he set has an opinion, be like, oh my god, I totally agree. And just be like, have like have him ending the second date being like, This is the girl of my dreams, and then ghost him. Yeah, it's petty. But also, I want to hear about it when you do it.

SPEAKER_01

No, I think it's a victory.

SPEAKER_05

I would've I would I would do it.

SPEAKER_01

I just looked on polymarket and people are betting whether or not this guy drives a cyber truck or not.

SPEAKER_05

Oh really?

SPEAKER_01

This guy definitely drives a cyber truck.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, he's in finance with Harry Potter right now. I think he drives a cyber truck. I think he drives like a like a like a land cruiser or something. Oh yeah, I can see that. Um He's in finance, so I don't see any reason why he couldn't be interesting. Okay. Uh what do we want? Do we want her to to set to hook him and ghost him? No.

SPEAKER_01

I think I think what's gonna h uh what we want is for her to hook him and ghost him. But I think that she actually likes him and she won't end up she'll she thinks she's gonna ghost him, but she won't ghost him. And then they're gonna have a they're gonna have a 10-year relationship that's not gonna end well.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. I would give it five. Five? Yeah. Yeah. I think five is long enough that like they move in together.

SPEAKER_06

And I'm gonna actually have to play a veto card towards this girl. She's not allowed to try to get back in touch with him. I'm sorry. All right, that's I'm gonna have to really definitively just put that down there. Veto card. Alright, you can't contact him.

SPEAKER_05

I'll send you her address. You can mail it to her. You can mail her the veto card.

SPEAKER_06

I just assume she's probably a listener and will hear it. Doesn't really need to.

SPEAKER_05

Uh problem solved. Uh let's see. Bridesmaid took my gift. I'm getting married next week. I'm getting married next weekend and have been sitting with this information for the past week. Basically, my sister asked me what I thought of her bridal shower gift. I must have looked shocked because she continued to describe a very intricate, specific detail that I had definitely not received or was aware of. It turns out she had given the gift to one of my bridesmaids prior to the event to put on the gift table. Apparently, when my sister told her what it was, she wouldn't stop going on about how beautiful and special it was. I have also seen this bridesmaid this past week, and nothing was mentioned about the gift having been forgotten in her car or something, etc. Is it worth confronting someone the week of the wedding and creating drama?

SPEAKER_06

That is the question, isn't it? This is a good question because I feel like it actually hinges on something that matters. You know, like the question here isn't, do I bring it up? Or is it simply like, hey, there's a big event that I'd like the least amount of awkwardness for. Yeah. So is this the right time? I think this is actually a good question here. Okay.

unknown

Oh.

SPEAKER_06

But what's the what's the answer? I jumped in first last time on that. I'm not I'm not answering first.

SPEAKER_01

So the wedding is has not happened yet.

SPEAKER_05

It happens in a wedding's a week away. Yeah, it's the week of the wedding.

SPEAKER_01

So I think that that the week of your wedding, of all of the things that are are causing you stress, I feel like that should be fairly on the back burner until I think the wedding hadn't happened. There's a chance that on the day of the wedding that gift will end up on the wedding gift table, or however that works.

SPEAKER_02

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05

And so maybe it's a chance. It's a bridal shower gift. It's not a wedding gift.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, bridal shower gift. Sorry, I was thinking wedding gift.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, okay. So she she should have had it already. Here's the here's the here's the complicated part, right? Is that it's a bridesmaid. So like she's gonna be up there, like, thinking about like it's gonna be in her mind. It's gonna be on her mind, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, she's gonna be kind of like thinking about this person that she loves the most and trying to remember her vows and all this sort of stuff while kind of like side-eyeing. Yeah, you bitch.

SPEAKER_01

That's no way to start a marriage.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Alright, then she she should ask her sister. Uh it's the sister gave the gift, right? I want to make sure I got it.

SPEAKER_05

Sister, yeah, this it was the gift from her sister, and she gave the her sister gave it to one of the bridesmaids.

SPEAKER_01

Well, she should tell her sister, be like, hey, hey, I never got tell I never got that gift. What happened? And then have the sister deal with the uh the drama.

SPEAKER_05

It doesn't say that her sister's like her uh maid of honor or anything, but I'm gonna guess that there's maybe a highly high likelihood that that's the case.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, maybe the sister was jilted and isn't even part of the wedding party. And so she's pissed about that. And so she made up this whole story of this awesome gift that she gave, and she never actually gave it, and she's trying to frame that other girl so she can take her spot in the wedding.

SPEAKER_05

Are we writing a uh daytime television drummer?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, we're gonna have we're gonna hire actors to act it out.

SPEAKER_05

I want to hire Jim Dale just to read it.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah, don't no no more cast members though. That's all we need. Just the one.

SPEAKER_05

Jim Dale playing. And and it's all the the funny thing is it's all females, and Jim Dale's gonna have to read all of them. He could do it.

SPEAKER_01

He's amazing.

SPEAKER_05

I feel like if it were me, like if it were me in this situation, I would want to I would want to deal with it before the before the wedding day. Right? Because what are the what are the chances? I feel like the chances get pretty high that like it comes up like at the reception after everybody's had three drinks. Yeah. And now you've got and now you've got like drama at the end of the like is it is it worse to have the drama kind of happen earlier in the week, or do you want a drunk a bunch of drunk, you know, wedding parties?

SPEAKER_06

If it was me, uh and realistically, like if if that same scenario occurred where I was the person without something that I like where I was expecting that a friend stole something, I would probably default to waiting until after it's all said and done. I'd probably be a little bit distant from them, a little bit, and you're like, yeah, it might be in the back of my head and I don't want that during the day of the wedding. But I don't think that you can necessarily cure that by taking care of all of it before the wedding. Even if you did it today and you had like a week to go, like that's still gonna at least be on your mind. So I don't think you're escaping the having it on your mind during the big day. I think that's just kind of there, and that sucks, it's not your fault, you know, but it's it is what it is. Uh, I wouldn't want to kick that beehive anymore until after that was all done. Not even at like at the reception or whatever. I'm talking about like one of the following days. Maybe I even go off to my honeymoon and then come back and be like, hey bitch, so uh what's up with that present? You know? Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. I didn't I I just wouldn't want because there's a chance, like there's a chance that uh there's a chance that it was some kind of a misunderstanding or what like right? Even if it's a small chance, there's a chance that she could be like, hey, I never got the gift. Oh, I put it, oh my god, it's in my it's in my car. I'm so sorry, it's in my car. Here it is. And then you're over it. Alright. But you're rolling the dice. You roll the dice, it's dicey. Yeah, what's the poly market say?

SPEAKER_01

Poly market says that there's a 77% chance that she definitely stole the gift.

SPEAKER_02

Shit.

SPEAKER_06

It's pretty high tension.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, she wanted to get caught.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. It was a call for help.

SPEAKER_05

Okay. Alright. So wait till you get back from your honeymoon and deal with it. I guess.

SPEAKER_01

Is that what we're doing?

SPEAKER_05

That's what we're going with. It is decided. Let's go to the dice of destiny. Uh, one through seven is Brent. Oh yeah, come on, seven. That's his two.

SPEAKER_06

Who's that? Oh, that's me. That's Brent. Nice. Congratulations. Congratulations, Brent. Well, I wanted to go back. I wanted to go back to uh a game that we hadn't played in a minute. Uh the the the Would You Rather game, where I'm gonna throw some different scenarios at us, and we can just openly discuss which of these two ridiculous options would be the better one to actually have to deal with in your own life.

SPEAKER_05

I'd rather fight a hundred duck-sized horses.

SPEAKER_06

There's one similar, there's one similar to that, you know. Uh yeah. But uh all are in that vein for sure. For example, um, would you rather have a theme song that plays out loud every time you enter a room or a laugh track that automatically triggers every time you say something funny?

SPEAKER_01

Theme song. Theme song.

SPEAKER_05

Who gets to decide wait, who gets to decide if it's funny or not? Because if I get to decide, like if I say something that I think is funny, yeah, and then there's could be a laugh track.

SPEAKER_06

No, I think it's gonna be about on par with like if you're having uh you know someone in the mixing room of a sitcom do it, and they're he's gonna add it in about the same places you know that uh that that would be. Okay.

SPEAKER_05

That's outrageous.

SPEAKER_01

I know for me, when I say some, you know, something really funny, I really enjoy the silence.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, true. That Johnny's kind of a master of the uh the awkward pause. Like I've never seen anyone execute it so masterfully uh as what Johnny's able to do. What you're saying is you've never seen anybody consistently not get a laugh as Johnny King.

SPEAKER_05

What are you saying? Our friend, Johnny King.

SPEAKER_01

Damn, you can tell if if something's funny, people laugh. See, that was funny. Yeah, that was funny. That was funny.

SPEAKER_06

All right, so th so theme song is what it seems like we're we're waiting.

SPEAKER_01

Do you get your theme song or is the theme song chosen by I'd say you'd then this was hypothetical.

SPEAKER_06

You get to pick your own theme song. Why do you have one that would uh be your your song of choice?

SPEAKER_01

No, I mean I'd want it to be, you know, to kind of match how I feel. I don't want somebody to all right.

SPEAKER_06

Then it's chicken fried by Zach Brown band. That's Johnny's theme music. Actually, you know what? No, um uh I actually I I changed my mind. I know exactly what Johnny's walk-in music would need to be. It would definitely have to be just can't get enough. Just can't get it enough.

SPEAKER_02

Just can't get enough.

SPEAKER_06

By the way, anytime that something actually comes up on uh on you know, request at the club, it's sort of an unwritten rule now that whoever's playing it, the person across from them has to start doing the famous like Johnny King Rich.

SPEAKER_01

Johnny King. That makes me happy.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, John Johnny you live in you you live on so so deeply in in the Austin room.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. Sounds like you should move back to Austin.

SPEAKER_06

Would you rather age normally, but your entire life everyone thinks you're actually 10 years older than you are? Or you get to stay looking young forever, but everyone will treat you like like they think you're a literal child your whole life. You get treated like a child whole life, but you look young.

SPEAKER_05

I get treated like a child and I don't look young, so yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I'd rather I'd rather look young and be treated like a child. Hmm.

SPEAKER_06

I think in this case my my I'd love to say looking young as much as possible, but in this case, I think uh I'd almost you know I'd take more of like that. I I'd be the male uh Maggie Smith, you know, like uh Professor McGonagall, like that just it looked the same age for like 50 years before she died. Um I'd be like the guy version of that, I think. I could I could maybe get some role, I'd go into acting, you know, Sir Maggie Smith. Yes. Sir Maggie Smith.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, man. Give me those good looks and treat me like a kid. Treat me like a baby.

SPEAKER_06

I hate being treated like a child. Aww, baby.

SPEAKER_01

Did you lose a game? Are you a loser? Are you a loser, George? George, you're a loser.

SPEAKER_05

Look how look how good, look how glowing my skin is.

SPEAKER_06

You're such a beautiful loser. Such a beautiful loser. Um would you rather have to announce everything you're doing out loud or have your thoughts subtitled above your head for everyone to read?

SPEAKER_05

Oh my thoughts subtitled? I can't do that. I can't do that. It's a liability, that's a fucking liability, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01

This one's easy. This is an easy one. I don't even you could put what I don't even know what your first question was. I can't remember what the first one was.

SPEAKER_06

You just know that you're not taking the second option. My thoughts are mine.

SPEAKER_01

Absolutely not. My thoughts are mine.

SPEAKER_06

Although it would be pretty annoying to have to announce everything you're doing. Like, I'm walking into the bathroom. I'm unzipping my fly. I am choosing.

SPEAKER_01

I am choosing number one.

SPEAKER_05

I'm choosing I am choosing number one.

SPEAKER_06

It is turning into something else. I am now sitting. You know.

SPEAKER_05

I just farted. I'm continuing to lightly fart and hoping that no one will notice. I hope nobody knows that I'm farting right now.

SPEAKER_06

Would you rather only be able to whisper when you're excited? Or you could only yell every time you were trying to be serious?

SPEAKER_05

This is we've already done this one, Brent Vito. Vito the repeat.

SPEAKER_06

We have. Okay, well, I'd marked him down a while ago. I didn't mark off that one, I guess. Okay, fine. Uh well, now you got me questioning which ones I already did before. Did I do that? Okay, would you rather have a rewind button for your life that only works 10 seconds at a time? Uh, or a fast forward button that you you kind of can't control once you press it. It's just gonna like you can skip through something, but you don't know how far it's gonna take you.

SPEAKER_05

Uh I mean, we saw the movie Click by it with Adam Sandler. Sure. So yeah, definitely reminiscent of that.

SPEAKER_01

I never saw that one, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_05

Well, spoiler alert. Uh-huh. That fast forward button, man. You can't undo it. You know?

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_06

Well, in the movie, he starts becoming more of a I don't know if victim's the right word, but he's that that condition keeps occurring more and more, and then he just starts aging really fast. I don't think this one's necessarily the same thing. It's not gonna auto-fast forward for you. You have the choice to, if you're ever in a moment where you're just like, fuck all of this, you can skip it. You just don't know how much time you're gonna lose for doing so.

SPEAKER_01

Oh and does that time come off of your life? Oh, yeah. I guess, yeah. Yeah, sure. Oh uh I'd like a rewind by the thing. Yeah, I'm gonna rewind. I enjoy some of the like the shitty things that I've had to do in my life. I don't know the afterwards. Like looking back.

SPEAKER_05

I'm like, uh But a 10 second rewind is like a that's like a that's like in case of emergencies, right? Like if so if if you walk into a room and somebody punches you in the face immediately, 10 second rewind. You walk into the room and immediately duck.

SPEAKER_06

But you can also kind of use it to like cheat the system, too. I mean, like I'd go back 10 seconds right after they announced the you know final, well, I guess maybe lottery number wouldn't work, but something like that, you know, like a horse race.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I would go back 10 seconds and and put a bet on that snail race, the world's snail race, this the snail snail racing. Racing. I'd be rich.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, I'd take the 10 second rewind. Yeah. Um it's not I don't think it's enough. 10 seconds is not enough to like win the lottery or win, like no, not win the lottery.

SPEAKER_06

It would be a good enough thing to like just be able to just jump back anytime. Like if you say one of those things that you end up later on in the day, like really thinking about being like, Oh, that was dumb. Why the hell did I say that? Like the ability to be able to erase that from ever happening, like that'd be pretty cool, man. If you didn't ever have to be like, I wish I hadn't said that.

SPEAKER_01

I say so many dumb things, I would love that.

SPEAKER_05

But I feel like I feel like, yeah, you just walk in and do the same thing again, like just really cherish this moment.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, what here's another way. Would you rather be stuck in a groundhog's day type scenario where you are just waking up living the same day over and over again, or just be where you're truly immortal and can't actually die? Like the world keeps going on around you. People that you love die, you have to watch all these things happen. World of, you know, like you, but you just you're like a vampire. You just know that you're there's no there's no rest in sight for you. You're just gonna be unfortunately immortal.

SPEAKER_05

But Groundhog's Day is also immortality just within the same day. Isn't Groundhog's Day eventually comes out of it?

SPEAKER_06

Okay. A better person. A better person with a lot of skills. I mean, the dude could play the piano like nobody's business after that. And he didn't lose any time out of his life, so it's like he got to like stretch out the life, but you know, all the people that you love are still there whenever you get back, is to them.

SPEAKER_05

I've never thought I've never thought that immortality seemed any fun. That doesn't seem like it'd be any fun to be immortal.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, no, I agree.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, do you have an opt-out like after you know a thousand years or something? You'd be like, ah.

SPEAKER_06

No, this is where you don't you don't have like you're you buy in and you're just a vampire, you're just in there. What's the rules though?

SPEAKER_05

What are the immortality rules? Because I feel like you you don't die of natural causes, but you could be like shot in the head or something. Fair.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I I didn't think that far into this one, so we could place Well, let's just do it. Let's just make something up. Okay, fine. Uh then no, if you if you get shot in the head, it it requires a hospital visit. Somehow you miraculously survive anything that befalls you. You blow up in a boss truck incident, all right. They're able to recollect your pieces and humpty dumpty you back together.

SPEAKER_01

Are you made though? Are you like you have scars and everything from it?

SPEAKER_06

No, I guess you'd be fine afterwards. You you get back to as long as they reassemble you correctly. As long as I still look pretty good.

SPEAKER_01

I think that's the important part.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And everybody treats you like a little baby.

SPEAKER_05

Wait, does everybody treat me like a little baby forever?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, you already picked that one, so you're just you're an eternal baby. All of these choices stack. Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_06

All right, stacking my debuffs. You're a you're an eternal baby with walk-in music.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, okay. I'm gonna go with Groundhog Day. I like I like I like that. Plus, you get a little bit of uh a little bit of immortality. But then once you snap, once you figure it out, then you get to snap back into your real life. But man, immortality is is I feel like um one of my driving things in staying alive is I'm just curious about what's gonna happen next with I just want to see like what what you know if I die, the worst, like my biggest regret is gonna be not to know what's gonna happen with all the things. Not seeing how history turns out, yeah. Yeah, like like what's gonna happen with all of this. Did you say if you die? Because spoiler alert. Oh, uh oh. Do you know so Vito Veto. I vetoed that all the way. I vetoed that.

SPEAKER_05

Johnny King's vetoed his own death. Holy crap, guys.

SPEAKER_06

He found the immortality hack.

SPEAKER_01

It's the loophole. But you can't use your veto to kill me.

SPEAKER_05

Well, I will say. No, I used my veto. I used my veto cards this episode for something stupid.

SPEAKER_06

Woo! Well, I have one left. Johnny vetoed his own death. No way I would veto your veto on that one. I'd rather keep Johnny alive. Hey, but good news, everybody. That is actually the end of the Would You Rather segment and drum roll, please. We have a loser. And that's George Milton.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, oh, George. Did you lose again? Don't treat me like that. Why are you guys talking to me like that? You're so beautiful. Thanks. Hey, you're beautiful too, Johnny. And so is Brent. And so are you guys. Hey, thanks for listening to our podcast, by the way. Except that one guy. Except that one guy. You guys are all beautiful immortal babies with walk-in music, probably. Send us an email at veto the podcast at gmail.com. Yeah, we've still got a gmail address.

SPEAKER_06

We're not paying for it yet.com email address, but we're trying.

SPEAKER_05

They're really hard because no there's no web browsers that will go to aol.com anymore. But send us an email. If you do the podcast at gmail.com, give us segments that you want us to do, or uh would you rather that you'd want us to do or stupid movies that you'd like us to watch. Um until then, we're gonna be in our garages working on our muscle cars, i.e., our Tesla Cybertrucks.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Until next time. Uh we love you guys. And I just bought a deltoid. You just bought a deltoid. Those are expensive, man. Congratulations. Yeah, that's nice. We'll see you guys next time. Bye-bye.

SPEAKER_04

Bye.

SPEAKER_03

Do I never do it? Bye bye, bye, but you should biddy friend in you. Shoo up. You got a friend, you got a friend to me. If I'm the kind of friend you need, yes, we'll see. It is true. Do up, do I hope I have a friend in you? Shoo-bitty friend in you. Do up. Feelin' okay. I'm pretty good. Alright. When your face is clearly in my side, the beautiful face true. Do up, I hope I have a friend in you. Do it, friend in you, chew up. We can walk it all hand in hand. We're holding hands. It's true as the moon up above. We can scatter into a dead little print To prove our total platonic love But you got a friend, you got a friend At least it's what you should believe Oh yeah, I hope I have a friend in you I hope I have a friend in you I hope to back to back to