Learning how to go slow

In case you haven’t noticed, going slow isn’t our forté. However, it’s something we’re trying to learn. To do that, we dive into crucial “Would you rather” discussions. Along the way, we realize we might actually have what it takes to run forever—we just never gave it a try. It’s life-altering stuff we’re talking about here. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:08

What's up, A students?

SPEAKER_02 0:12

On the microphone, you've got Amy and Lydia. Woo-Whoo!

SPEAKER_01 0:17

We're back with another Thursday episode as always.

SPEAKER_02 0:22

We're back with this will be on the test. Will this be on the test? Some of it might. I mean, like we listen to this.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

So make sure to grab a notebook and pen. Because this will be on the test. Today we are talking about slowing down in life. Something I think we both are still learning. It's a process. But we do a marathon, not a race, right?

SPEAKER_02 0:52

Not a sprint. Whoops. Not a sprint. Marathon is a type of race.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

Um, the first, would you rather speak of going slow is would you rather walk slowly in front of someone or too fast behind an old lady with a walker.

SPEAKER_02 1:08

So I'm imagining walking too fast behind an old lady with a walker that you're like on her heels, right? Like you're very annoying. You're stressing her out.

SPEAKER_00 1:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:18

And walking too slowly. I do feel like most people who walk too slowly are very oblivious to the fact that they're walking too slowly for the person behind them. Yes. Like often it's a group and you're like, will one of you please move out of the way?

SPEAKER_01 1:33

Like speed up if they are not getting it for some reason.

SPEAKER_02 1:36

Yeah. I will say, just quickly, in Mexico, this rarely happened. Really? Like if I was walking quickly behind someone, like they often move to the side and yeah, are just very courteous. Um, that being said, I don't think I can walk too fast behind an old lady with a walker. That just like seems rude. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:55

I even feel bad sometimes passing older people. We do. I slow down a little bit. Sorry. Yes, I'm young and nimble. So too slow in front of somebody, I think.

SPEAKER_02 2:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:07

We agree.

SPEAKER_02 2:08

Yeah. I think it's also kind of like you know, when you're in a car and someone's tailgating you, yeah. So you do aggressively the speed limit.

SPEAKER_01 2:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

That's kind of how I'm seeing it.

SPEAKER_01 2:18

Like I had a friend, she knew where a speed trap was, and she usually drove too slow, and a lot of people would like honk at her or then pass her. And so if people were tailgating her or being rude, she would drive extra slow right before the speed trap. Oh, that's so good. Oh, my little revenge.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

Oh, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 2:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:46

Yeah. I feel like driving the speed limit when someone's tailgating you, or maybe slowing down a little bit under the speed limit, like you're just making your both a little more safe because you're going slower. Like, I don't see the point. Yeah. But I also don't get the point of tailgating. Like, so many people do it. It's insane. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:05

Anyway. So he would walk slow in front of other people. You too, right? Sorry?

SPEAKER_02 3:10

You too?

SPEAKER_01 3:10

Or would you like walk right up to the old lady and be like, I think if I did that, then I'd have to like grab her by the arm and be like, I'll help you walk.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

Faster because you're so fucking slow.

SPEAKER_01 3:24

Would you rather only ever be able to do one thing at a time well? Or only be able to do like three things at a time, but you don't do them well. So you can either multitask, but the things are done not to perfection. Or you can only concentrate on one thing at a time.

SPEAKER_02 3:43

So like you're asking which one I should do because I currently like yeah, that happens a lot in my life. I mean, I think it's so much better for human brains if you do one thing at a time well.

SPEAKER_00 3:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:59

I do wonder if you have like I feel like as a teacher this was quite difficult to do one thing at a time. Because you're like, you're trying to teach a lesson and then someone like is kicking their desk mate, and then also someone is knocking on the door and like you're trying to do one thing well, but you can't.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:20

So while I do think doing one thing well is like, yeah, that should be how it's done, I don't think it is possible in a lot of professions. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:33

Yeah, I don't know. I think you just have the I think even in teaching it would help if you're like, if you think to yourself, okay, I'm gonna do this first. Like often I'll say to the students, not right now. They'll all be yelling at the same time, Miss McKenzie, and then I'll be like, wait, it's not your turn, and try to do one thing at a time. Yeah, I think it does help.

SPEAKER_02 4:56

I yeah, I definitely get that. I just think subconsciously you are doing multiple things.

SPEAKER_01 5:01

Possibly, yeah. But this is you're incapable of doing multiple things at a time.

SPEAKER_02 5:06

Maybe that would actually be a good thing. I actually I think I would choose the one thing at a time because that would really force me to do one thing at a time.

SPEAKER_01 5:12

You think it's a conspiracy that men are like men can't multitask?

SPEAKER_02 5:16

Yeah, nobody can multitask. I don't know why they think women can.

SPEAKER_01 5:20

Yeah, that's fair.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

Sometimes I'm listening to a podcast and doing the dishes, and I get distracted from the dishes. I'm like, that's a really good point. And then I just like am really into the podcast, or I'm doing the dishes and listening to a podcast, and I have to like rewind 10 minutes because I'm like, I don't like I wasn't listening, I was focused on this little thing that needs to get off my plate. Yeah, that happens a lot. Um, one thing at a time, I think. But I would get super frustrated. But then if you have kids, yeah, that's that's what I like. The teaching thing is kind of like having a room full of kids, right?

SPEAKER_01 5:53

Yeah. I think every mom listening is like, wait. Yeah, just doing that you have kids. Next question. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:02

Would you rather be able to run for really long distances, but with a pace of 12 minutes per kilometer or slower, or be able to run a pace of 150 per kilometer, but only for 200 meters at a time before needing a five-minute break.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

But 12 minutes is walking.

SPEAKER_02 6:25

You're still jogging. I mean, there are people who have like a slower pace but can just go for a really long time.

SPEAKER_01 6:31

Yeah, but 12 minutes, I think. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 6:36

I did have to look up because I didn't want to put our uh like fastest speed above the like world record. The world record is 147 for a hundred meters. So you're pretty much an Olympian at this speed.

SPEAKER_01 6:52

Oh, that changes things. I'm an Olympian at that speed.

SPEAKER_02 6:56

I mean, pretty much, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:59

So I can make money off of this.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

Oh my god. Okay, I have a weird idea, but like I think it would be funny if this is just like your running speed and it has nothing to do with your physical body, like it would be kind of fun to eat a lot of food and get a little bit heavier and then go to the Olympics and get mud because they always look like so muscly and like so down to just have somebody who's like like that person has no chance, and that'd be fun. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 7:29

My thought actually went to let me run real quick and get that. Can you only go? And then you're just bolting where or you're late for the train, and then people think you're in danger because you're just going so fast. Uh I think I'd go for the fast initially. I thought I'd go 12 minutes uh pace because I really like going for runs. And now if I can go to the Olympics, let's say you can't go to the Olympics.

SPEAKER_02 7:56

Like, you're not. I was just thinking of someone, like you know, in those movies when they're like, he's still in my bag, and you're like, don't worry, I'll get it. But what if it's like 202 meters? So you're just behind him, and then you're like, Oh, give me five minutes.

SPEAKER_01 8:11

That would be so shitty. Okay, or in the Olympics, they want you to run a longer distance. You're like, I can't do it. I can't. You can't go to the Olympics.

SPEAKER_02 8:23

Let's take that out.

SPEAKER_01 8:26

But I mean, no, also because I'm gonna be a professional athlete.

SPEAKER_02 8:29

Yeah, with the other one, you can also be like, I'm gonna run from here till here, and like you eat on like you can cover crazy distances, like not humanly possible, it's just slow.

SPEAKER_01 8:42

It's really slow. It's not that you're not bored, that's so much time with your thoughts.

SPEAKER_02 8:48

You can listen to podcasts. Yeah. Maybe it's good for you. See, this is doing one thing at a time. I mean, it's still jogging for some people. It depends on your fitness level, I think. Like it can still be. I don't know, I don't look this up.

SPEAKER_01 9:04

I don't know. If I can go to the Olympics, then it's definitely the fast one.

SPEAKER_02 9:08

But if I can't Well, the other one you can do like what Forrest Gump did. Like you can start a movement where like I'm running from Switzerland to China.

SPEAKER_01 9:18

Yeah, but can you make money off of that?

SPEAKER_02 9:22

Yeah. Probably.

SPEAKER_01 9:26

I mean Did you hear do you know about the toughest geezer? The guy who ran the length of Africa.

SPEAKER_02 9:32

Yeah, see you can do that.

SPEAKER_01 9:34

That'd be cool. I still take the fast one. I think I just want to be I think I want to be fast. Yeah. I think if you can't improve your pace at all when running so much, that would be a little frustrating. Yeah. Yes, you can go forever, but who's to say you can't go forever now at that pace? We've never tried.

SPEAKER_02 9:56

That's true. No, I have. It's tough. I can't.

SPEAKER_01 10:00

Yeah, I probably can't.

SPEAKER_02 10:01

Yeah, I would also pick the running fast. Okay. But also just because like I can't run that fast. So I'm really curious about what like how it would feel.

SPEAKER_01 10:09

Yeah. So the reason for this episode. I honestly think I don't know if it's on your social media as well, but my social media, January 1st, was like all about slowing down. Like slow down your life. You gotta go slow to go fast or whatever. I guess that might have been just my feed.

SPEAKER_02 10:32

No, I uh I don't think I'm on social media like that. Um, like YouTube I use, but it wasn't really on there for me. Okay. I have heard the like go slow to go fast for sure. Yeah. But I wouldn't say like I noticed it this year.

SPEAKER_01 10:50

Okay, because I think I wasn't sure for a while if it was just the people that I'm following. I think it is. I think it's like this little bubble that I'm in. Okay. And they're trying to slow down in life. Um I think that I put a lot of pressure on myself to do everything or to like live life to the fullest. And so for the last few years I've been trying to be everywhere all the time, never mess out, that kind of thing. And then I realized that it just leads to me doing things poorly. I manage to do a lot of things, but none of it like to full satisfaction.

SPEAKER_02 11:29

So none of it?

SPEAKER_01 11:30

No, not none of it, but a lot of it not to full satisfaction. Or it doesn't satisfy me because I don't even have time to enjoy it. Yeah. Because then I'm just moving on to the next thing. Yeah. So this year that's like one of my goals is to kind of slow down, spend more time at home with myself.

SPEAKER_02 11:47

That's a good goal.

SPEAKER_01 11:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

While you were talking, I just thought, because you said like to live life to its fullest. And I thought that's such a weird way. Like, who's to judge that?

SPEAKER_01 11:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:00

And also, like, having a lot of things doesn't mean you're living life fully.

SPEAKER_01 12:05

No.

SPEAKER_02 12:06

Like, aren't we? I mean, we're all living life fully. It's impossible not to live your life fully, kind of. You can get distracted and stuff, but like you can't not live your life fully.

SPEAKER_01 12:15

Because once like No, but you can like get stuck in routines, I think. I'm very scared of that. To like that, all of a sudden I'll wake up and be like, I wanted to do all these things and I didn't get to do any of it. Yeah. Like I didn't do any of it. Not get to do, because I think if you really put your mind to it, more is possible than you initially think.

SPEAKER_02 12:36

Okay. Yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_01 12:38

That is the big fear of like on your deathbed, like, ugh, I wish I would have done that.

SPEAKER_02 12:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:46

But then if you don't enjoy it, yeah, I think if you do all these things and you don't enjoy makes yeah, I realize that it doesn't make much sense.

SPEAKER_02 12:55

Yeah. I think when I left Mexico, I realized I had so many things, like I still have a lot of things I would have loved to do in Mexico. But when I was leaving, I was like, I like I am very happy with everything I did do. And I had to change my mindset of like I didn't see this or I didn't go there. And like, I've never been to the northern part of Mexico. I really want to do the train ride, blah blah blah. And there's so many things that I could have, shoulda, woulda. But then I was like, actually, I did so much, and like I'm really, I'm very satisfied. And I think that's something I also had to like practice telling myself. Yeah. Like I would have missed out on, I don't know, other things had I always been traveling or something. Um so I think it's a good, like, it's a good thing to practice. I don't think I'm very good at it yet.

SPEAKER_01 13:39

I think it is a bit scary too, because you have more time with your thoughts, which is can be a bit daunting in the beginning, especially if you're like prone to anxiety. I think if you're prone to anxiety, the it's the first reaction, or at least for me, is that I'll be flooded with anxiety because I've just been suppressing it for so long. Yeah. And then I finally give my body time to feel. But you kind of gotta go through it.

SPEAKER_02 14:04

I'm very curious about this episode. I think it's something I'm not particularly good at, but something I want to get better at.

SPEAKER_00 14:10

Yeah, same.

SPEAKER_02 14:11

Um I think I have moments where I'm quite good at it. Where like I'm like, okay, I'm I'm satisfied with the outcome of this, or it's it's definitely a process. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:21

I think it is nice. I was very happy when this showed up in my on my social media feed because I feel like for the past few years the whole vibe on the internet has been optimization to the max. Like do everything, wake up at 4 a.m. so that you can get your workout in and then go to work and then come home and clean your apartment perfectly and that's not my life. No, it's not mine. But it feels like are you here, all these famous people like you can do it all, you can have it all. And sure, I guess you could, but then the question is, do you want to if you don't have time to enjoy do you want to have kids and then two companies and blah blah blah blah if you have no time for your kids anymore?

SPEAKER_02 15:06

So maybe your kids are annoying, and then that is what you want.

SPEAKER_01 15:09

Fair I just think it's nice that that's a movement.

SPEAKER_02 15:15

Me too. I think for me it's a little confusing, like it can go very strong in both directions of like wake up at 4 30, blah blah get it all done, and then there's the too slow for me. And I find it hard. Like, I think I've tried being very slow, and I don't know if it's society or the way I am, but I don't think that works for me.

SPEAKER_01 15:38

No, same.

SPEAKER_02 15:39

Like, I don't think I'm that chilled and laid back in a way, like I can't just not do anything for a few days at a time. Like I get bored laying on the beach.

SPEAKER_01 15:51

Yeah, same. So but that's why I think the slowing down works for our personalities because we're very active. I think if you are prone, so if I slow down too much, then I'll get into like a slump where I feel like I can't do anything. So it is a balance. Okay. Let's get into that. Yeah, let's get into it.

SPEAKER_02 16:12

I'm very I'm I'm I'm super interested in your answers.

SPEAKER_01 16:16

Um, I wrote down as a first question what thought makes you want to speed up or stresses you out and makes you feel like you need to do everything at once or oh gosh, we're getting real.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

Um I think oh god, okay. Well, uh for me it comes down a lot to like self-worth. Okay. And I noticed with the new job, like I don't feel like I'm working. I because I'm not like I can't do my job yet because I have to learn about the company first, and that's a new concept to do.

SPEAKER_01 16:46

Yeah, just for exactly.

SPEAKER_02 16:48

It hasn't been that long, but like it does, it stresses me out and it makes me want to do overtime to learn the company faster, to be better at this, to like why haven't I gotten there yet? People are expecting things of me, even though it's like this company is very patient. I've had multiple people tell me, like, there's no stress, we know the process. Yeah, I understand that though. But it's like a I don't know, like I have to prove myself by by being the best.

SPEAKER_01 17:17

By I see that, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 17:19

And I think it is somehow connected to self-worth. What stresses me out is a lot, so let's not even get into that.

SPEAKER_01 17:26

How much time do we have?

SPEAKER_02 17:29

It's gonna be a long episode.

SPEAKER_01 17:31

But it what's then like what is is there like a sentence that goes through your mind or something that you like an intrusive thought or something?

SPEAKER_02 17:40

I think my intrusive thoughts are really good, uh what is it, cosplayers? Like they always come in different costumes.

SPEAKER_01 17:48

Fun.

SPEAKER_02 17:48

Yeah. So I don't know if it's one intrusive thought, but I think if I like follow an intrusive thought, then it is usually like you're not good enough. And I think that is at the core of a lot of my like I need to do more, or yeah, like to prove my worth to other people.

SPEAKER_01 18:05

And does doing more make you like can you get to the point where you feel like okay, now I'm doing enough?

SPEAKER_02 18:12

I mean, probably not, no. I mean, yeah, I do get to a point where I'm happy, but I think that's more when I'm like satisfied with the results, and I don't know if it necessarily means like I've done things something really quickly.

SPEAKER_01 18:23

So you don't think it's based on the speed, it's based on you getting validation somehow that it's a job well done.

SPEAKER_02 18:29

I think so. Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:32

But the speed comes from you thinking that you need to improve yourself in order to be enough.

SPEAKER_02 18:37

I think so, but like I am trying not to fall into that trap. Yeah. Like so I'm not doing this yet. And like no one cares. Or if they do, do I need a care that they care kind of thing? Is my is what I'm trying to get my mindset to. And uh, it's been a super big success. It's very easy, and uh just you know, decide to make the change and it happens.

SPEAKER_01 19:01

What about you? Uh it's funny that you said the self-worth thing. I mean, probably that's part of it for me. I never connected it with that. It's definitely when I'm feeling low, I feel like I need to do more when actually I would need to take a break then. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want to be an unproductive human. I don't want to just I think we're very fortunate to have the life that we do, and then I don't want to, I don't know, just lull around or take it for granted. Yeah. And so, like on days when I clean my apartment, I used to have a huge issue with that because I would clean the apartment and I would do it well, but at the end of the day, like doing that and chores, there's no real tangible result. And so I would feel like I hadn't done anything that whole day. And that would annoy me a lot. It's I I don't know where it comes from. Often it is the thought deep, deep down, I think I need to make the most of this. Like I need to make the most of the time that I have. Yeah. It's definitely like this overall pressure to make the most out of life and not waste my time.

SPEAKER_02 20:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:18

Here.

SPEAKER_02 20:19

I mean that makes sense, but also like I don't know, define wasting your time here.

SPEAKER_01 20:24

Yeah. Are there like signs that you have to notice when you're getting stressed out and you're falling back into this pattern?

SPEAKER_02 20:29

Oh my god, I'm so bad at this.

SPEAKER_01 20:31

Same.

SPEAKER_02 20:32

Like, yeah, I'm sure there are signs, but I blow past them until I'm at like uh I don't know, the end of the road, and I'm like, why am I getting all panicky all the time right now? Why do I feel like I'm constantly shaking?

SPEAKER_00 20:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:49

Why can I not sleep well? Um, yeah, I wish I was better at recognizing the signs. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

And like more anxiety.

SPEAKER_02 20:59

Yeah, definitely. But sometimes I really only notice when it's like you're a little it's a little too bad. Yeah. And I think like I know what things to do then. But I also know like if I like for me, I've already said this, journaling really helps to like release everything. But I don't journal regularly. I journal when I'm not feeling great.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:23

And it's like if I journaled every three days, I could probably stop this buildup. But I don't want to take the time to journal because it takes a lot of time. Yeah. Like it's a very stupid thing. So I do think I notice, but it's almost I push past a lot of things.

SPEAKER_01 21:41

Mm-hmm. What about you? Okay. Somewhat similar. I do like when I'm stressed out is when I will push my emotions down the most because I feel like I don't have time for this right now. I can't I can't take on another thing. There's too much going on. We deal with the anxiety later. You can wait. Um I think I will like I'll drop things more. I'll be more clumsy. I get more forget forgetful and definitely more irritable. Yeah, there's little signs I I guess they're typical. Also more panic attacks and like more anxiety, but that's further down the line. It's just it feels like a lack of overview when I'm stressed. Then I couldn't if I'm really stressed or if I have a really heavy week, I couldn't tell you off the top of my head what I'm doing that weekend. Yeah. I I would have to go and check in my phone what I'm doing in a few days. And I have like no like this week was a little quite stressful. I had no capacity to plan my weekend. It felt like so far away because there were so many things happening before then.

SPEAKER_00 22:49

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 22:51

So, yeah, stuff like that, I think. And then like sitting down to read seems like a big deal because it's like I need to deal with my thoughts to a certain extent, even though I'm reading. But I try to occupy my mind. I'll be on watching videos more or listening to podcasts or just filling my mind with whatever I can.

SPEAKER_02 23:10

Oh, that's such a good point. I do that too. Where it's like I need to distract myself from being stressed.

SPEAKER_01 23:14

Yeah. And then you just fill fill your head as much as you can exactly because it's already full, which is also you would need the opposite probably in that moment.

SPEAKER_02 23:23

But you don't like it's also kind of scary to do the opposite, I think. Like if I'm watching a YouTube video or listening to a podcast and walking, I can't like I can't feel those feelings at the same time. So it's yeah, I definitely oof, oh no. Yeah, that's not good. See, this is why I think slowing down is a good thing. I think it's really difficult though.

SPEAKER_01 23:41

I think it is really difficult and it's a process. Um I also think there's like little things that you can do.

SPEAKER_02 23:49

Wait, what are the little things you can do?

SPEAKER_01 23:52

It's probably very individual, but I would listen to podcasts like constantly when I wasn't working, working if I'm stressed out. And if I now I try to have like guidelines for myself when I'm allowed.

SPEAKER_02 24:10

Can I ask what your guidelines are?

SPEAKER_01 24:13

So for I used to listen on the bike ride to school even, and that's only five minutes, but now I've banned myself from doing that. So I at least have to take those five minutes before work to kind of clear my thoughts.

SPEAKER_02 24:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 24:28

And I have to read before I go to sleep. I try to, when I go for a run, to not always listen to a podcast while I'm running. Those are like the three steps.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

If you don't listen to a podcast, can you listen to music, or is it then you don't listen to anything?

SPEAKER_01 24:46

Usually I don't listen to anything. Okay. But I could. I don't think music has the same effect.

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Yeah, I don't think so either.

SPEAKER_01 24:54

But I usually then don't listen to anything because music kind of impacts my running pace, which I don't want. Okay. So yeah, those are like the little things. And then for some reason, I uh thought it would be a good idea to start making sourdough. And it actually really helped. So stupid. But in the beginning, when I this has only been like a month, and the first time I made it, I was like, this is so annoying. I have to be at home all the time to make this stupid sourdough bread. And it takes so much time where I can't do anything, I just have to wait around for this bread. But actually, it's very nice because it forces me to be at home and to kind of calm. I can clean the apartment while it's brewing or whatever. You can't let it sit every now and again. And um I think something like that where you're forced to kind of calm down, that helps me. Yeah. Because I'm still doing something productive. Yeah. I'm making a bread, but it needs for it to turn out well, it needs for me to be present at be in one place.

SPEAKER_02 26:04

Do you listen to podcasts and stuff then, or do you really try like, no, now I'm baking bread. This is the one thing I'm doing.

SPEAKER_01 26:11

No, I listen to podcasts. I will still, like, I could calm down more, and I'll probably like clean the apartment while I'm making the bread, do my laundry and stuff like that. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:21

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 26:22

Because I can't, it's like for hours and hours. It's like five or six hours. I mean, you know.

SPEAKER_02 26:27

Yeah. Um bread takes up, especially sourdough.

SPEAKER_01 26:30

Yeah. Yeah. Because you have to like knead the dough every now and again. I can't fully just I couldn't sit down and read for six hours. But it just forces me to be home and not make any plans. Yeah. Which is good for me. Yeah. I used to be like trying to fill every minute of my day.

SPEAKER_02 26:45

That's true. I don't know how you were always so busy. I also don't know how you knew that many people. I was like, how is she? She always has plans. Like I have, yeah. I don't know that many people.

SPEAKER_01 26:55

Yeah, but just with the horseback riding, all of it was full, I think. Yeah, I think so too. We have two more people. The whole schedule is full. It seemed like more people than it was. What I'm not so good at, I think you're you do sometimes is meditation.

SPEAKER_02 27:11

Yes, I do meditate sometimes. I'm not, I don't know. Are there people I feel like who are very good at it and who are like just meditate every day for five to ten minutes? And five to ten minutes is really not a lot.

SPEAKER_01 27:21

No, but I can't like a lot.

SPEAKER_02 27:23

I feel it I find it hard to stick to it. I do like meditation. I have done like longer meditations and shorter meditations. I think it's good to be with yourself in that way. And like I really like guided meditations, which I think people are also like, no, just like no voice. Yeah. Um, I've also done non-guided meditations. I do like them. I don't do them consistently. Sometimes I think I want to, but then it also feels like I'm trying to do too much again, even though it's just meditating.

SPEAKER_01 28:02

Um, another thing on the list. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 28:05

I do have an app on my phone. I don't remember what it's called. It's a free app that has like guided meditations or other meditations. And then sometimes when I'm on the train, I'm like, you know what? Instead of listening to a podcast or whatever, I'm just gonna close my eyes and meditate.

SPEAKER_01 28:18

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 28:19

And that, yeah, that works.

SPEAKER_01 28:21

Okay. I heard I can't remember where this was. I maybe in a podcast. I thought that meditation was always like sit-down guided meditation, but that it could be just looking at a rock and trying to focus only on the rock and like no other thoughts in your mind.

SPEAKER_02 28:39

Yeah, I think it depends, like, there are so many different types of meditation. I think for me, for a long time, meditation was like a clear state, and there's no thoughts in your mind. Um, which I don't think I've ever achieved that, even in the longer meditations. Um, but what I can sometimes do successfully is not like nothing, but when a thought does appear, to not let it go down the rabbit hole, yeah, but just to look at it for what it is. And sometimes I'm like, where did that come from? Why well, but it's like, okay, it's I just had this thought. And it doesn't matter where it came from, it doesn't matter what, but this is just a thought that I'm having. And then it's interesting, like, yeah, to observe the thoughts, and then I'm like, wait, who is observing the thoughts? There's like this whole like spiral I go down then. Like, am I observing the thoughts or am I observing the observer who's observing the exactly? I get really matrix-y about it. Um, you don't meditate?

SPEAKER_01 29:41

No. Not no not um I did it as a kid, I noticed the other day. Like before I would fall asleep, I would just try to empty my head. But not and now I only realize that that's an odd thing to do as a kid, but I would try to just like not think of anything and make my head empty because I thought it was kind of fun. But not so much now. I think it could be nice to try before sleeping just to try to empty your head completely. I don't like the guided meditations so much unless it's to fall asleep.

SPEAKER_02 30:21

Okay, I think it like for me, it really depends on the type of guided meditations too. There are like visualizations that I don't like. Like, imagine you're in a meadow. And for me that really doesn't work because and then they're like, and then there's a ladder in the meadow, and I'm like, wait, what is a ladder standing on if we're in a meadow?

SPEAKER_01 30:36

I have the same thing. I can't do that. What kind of ladder is it? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:40

Um, it's interesting. I think you do meditate when you talk about like manifestation, when you're like imagining your future, and like for me that sounds like a meditative state.

SPEAKER_01 30:51

Yeah, that's true. I do try to right, we talked about manifesting in one of our early episodes. There that I try to do regularly while where I'll just sit on my bed or lay in my bed and just picture my future. Yeah. Which I guess that is sort of meditation.

SPEAKER_02 31:07

To me, that sounds like meditation. I don't know if it counts. I don't know if there's like a there's probably a definition. Probably.

SPEAKER_01 31:13

What are your favorite ways to slow down? What are tricks you have or things you do that help you slow down in life?

SPEAKER_02 31:21

I think you already mentioned a few that are really good. Like for me, I realized if I constantly have headphones in, um, it kind of stresses me out more because that means I'm constantly listening to something. And when I'm not doing well, I try to do that. So running without uh music or a podcast, or just like taking my headphones out and just being. Um, but also I have like I like knitting and crocheting and embroidery. And I sometimes watch a show with it, which is fine for me, but I also realize when I'm overwhelmed or something, it's nice to just sit and do that because my mind can wander, but also I have to focus a little bit. Yeah. And I don't know if it's me not being comfortable or whatever. I'm sure we could analyze this or someone can analyze this, but I don't like not doing anything. And like I like slowing down and being productive. Yeah. And I think that is possible.

SPEAKER_01 32:26

I think that's okay too. I think it's personality-based.

SPEAKER_02 32:29

I think so too. Like, I don't like laying on the beach, I like walking. But like, I don't see, like, I don't think I have to lay on the beach to get the same effect of just like not doing anything. Like, I can walk and clear my head too, much better actually, than if I'm laying down. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I would say those are probably my favorite slowdown hobbies.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

I also like reading, but fiction, well, no, not fiction, but just like um just stories. Yeah. Not educational books. I do like reading educational books, but that's not how I wind down. Yeah, same. And then sometimes just sports. Yeah, sports are great. Yeah. Going for a run or a bike ride or something where you can just go and clear your head and you don't have any distraction can be very nice.

SPEAKER_02 33:16

I think sports is also a really good thing to teach you that like slowing down helps. Because I remember in Mexico I was running a pace that was really slow for me, because I was doing a training plan and I was like, this is ridiculous. I feel so slow. But then we did a 5k race, and like my time improved so much, and I don't know how it works that when you slow down, I don't understand, you go faster. Yeah. Um, but it that's kind of like a fun lesson to learn in sports because I think it's very valid in life as well. Not that you need to go faster in the end, but like slowing down can help.

SPEAKER_01 33:50

I think also things like enjoying your food. We've mentioned this in a different episode. I'm I'm not very good at this, but like trying not to have screens on while you eat your food, or like just make yourself a coffee midday and then enjoy the coffee. Because in the end, that's only probably five or ten minutes of your day, but it can make a big difference if you try to be present. Yeah, I think those things are what I try to do. Hanging out with the nephews and nieces.

SPEAKER_02 34:22

Yeah, I feel like little kids are a good way to slow down. Cause like, or just hanging out. I think in general, hanging out with people. Because then it's hard to be like you can still distract yourself, you can still watch something together or whatever, but like just being with someone else.

SPEAKER_01 34:40

But for me it has to be small groups, like one or two people. Yeah. If it's a big group, then stresses me out again.

SPEAKER_02 34:47

Yeah, I think that's also personality dependent on it. Yeah, for sure. Sometimes it's nice, sometimes it's also like, oh, this is too many people. Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

Funny stories?

SPEAKER_02 34:59

Funny stories. Okay. Okay. Um, so I feel like I've been working on this slowing down thing, and I've tried to figure out like what is the right amount for me. Um, so I signed up for a 10-day silent retreat in Mexico. Um was it the right amount? There was a three-day and a 10-day. And like I said, I'm not good at like just laying on the beach, just sitting in a room. I was like, okay, I'm gonna challenge myself. But this was also, I think I went in with the wrong, like, I'm going to sit for 10 days because challenge myself.

SPEAKER_01 35:33

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 35:34

Yeah. Um, so yeah, I realized that there are things that are too slow for me. Like, I that was just really not my cup of tea. I didn't, I enjoyed a day of it.

SPEAKER_00 35:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:48

I left five days early.

SPEAKER_00 35:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:50

Um, and then I like I left. I was like, I'm fleeing. I got out of the town. Everything seemed too slow in that town for me. It was like one of those like yoga hippie towns in Mexico, and I was like, I just like I just need to get back into the world and like go and do something. I didn't even like then I went to a surfing place and I didn't do much. Like I walked on the beach, I went surfing, but I was doing things, and it made me feel so much more at ease than the silent retreat. Did like the silent retreat. I don't know. There was one day where I really was like, wow, this is eye-opening and so cool, and the rest I just felt sick. And I was like, oh god, this is really not your kid.

SPEAKER_01 36:32

Not my cup of tea.

SPEAKER_02 36:34

So if you're thinking of signing up for a silent retreat, um, I think you gotta be really gung-ho about it.

SPEAKER_01 36:40

That's my and it's also okay to then realize after a day this is not my thing, and then quit.

SPEAKER_02 36:47

Yeah, and it's also okay to realize like one person's slow is another person's like, oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

Yeah, the tempo of uh different people is vastly different. Yeah. What's your funny story? Uh it's not about me slowing down. It this happened recently in class. The students had to read a theater, and one of the students was a turtle, and he the parent it was parent visitation day, and he read so slow. So cute. And it was hilarious, and he's he nine or ten, and he just stuck with it. And I was like, the amount of calmness that you need inside to in front of the whole class and your parents, just be like, no, I'm gonna stick with it and just go slow. Like he was reading in that tempo, it was amazing. Everybody was losing it because it was so funny that you just stuck with the slow tempo. So yeah. Thought I might might take him as an example for my life. Slow down might uh just do the turtle. Yeah. Well, I think it's a progress. Uh work in work in progress.

SPEAKER_02 38:09

Work in progress. Take your headphones out after this episode.

SPEAKER_01 38:12

Yeah. Just be enjoying sunrise, enjoy sunset.

SPEAKER_02 38:17

Or, you know, listen to the next podcast.

SPEAKER_01 38:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:21

Go for a run. Go. You know what you shouldn't do though.

SPEAKER_01 38:26

No.

SPEAKER_02 38:26

Don't be a dick.

SPEAKER_01 38:27

Yeah. Just don't be an asshole.