After the Ring | Coach Cessante on Faith, Family, and What Comes Next

In the wake of Catholic Central's 2026 D1 State Championship, hosts Aaron Babicz '93 and Chris Okoye '14 welcome Head Football Coach Justin Cessante '99 back to House of Hammers. This is more than a championship recap — it's a candid conversation about the personal growth required to lead, the role of faith in athletics, and how the CC Family turns tradition into a launchpad. Coach Cessante also shares his "Shield Down" leadership model and what it looks like to lead with your guard down.

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:14

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to episode 15 of the House of Hammers. Christopher Okoye and myself designed this to spread positivity, motivation, teach people how to fail forward, and find out what makes some of the finest leaders, hammers, and individuals tick. But before we get to today's guest, who we are extremely excited about, and I could talk endlessly about what he's done here at Catholic Central in his college career, professional career. But before we celebrate our guests, you know, I got to tap in with co-host Chris Okoye and just see what he's had going on lately. Chris, share some positivity with us. Let us know what you've been uh you've been doing lately.

SPEAKER_02 0:48

Man, peace and blessing to the coachers. But it's been all mentioning to help enrich society, man. Seeing young men offer different career options, checking out our young guys' mental health, let them know that spring break is a time to get better, not get worse. You know how the spring break hurtles some of our guys. So just let them know, man, let's not let's not risk a week or two of fun for the rest of our senior junior or sophomore year season. So staying in contact with those guys, loving them up, man, keeping that, keeping that relationship powerful, man. It's been a I see you're dipping your toe a little bit more into the AI world. Oh, yeah, we uh yeah. We recently started teaching uh AI literacy, so that's been a big, big thing, sharing our new framework of uh role task format. So it's been uh been a blessing. You know, everyone's talking about tech here, tech there, and I focus on teaching non-technical people how to better use AI. So that's been you can make a trillion dollars here with some of our people teaching what AI even means.

SPEAKER_04 1:40

I don't even know if they know what AI means. It's being no offense.

SPEAKER_02 1:43

Yeah, it's been it's being it's being forced forced upon people. However, you know, 92% of people don't even know how to write a prompt or even are still even have a paid subscription. So even though it's everywhere around us, 90% of people aren't really using it. And out of the 9% people that are using it, they don't really know how to use it. And so, yeah, man, we're just trying to you know pour into people and educate those that aren't super technical, which is majority of Americans, like old people is what you're saying.

SPEAKER_04 2:08

So you're trying to educate old people.

SPEAKER_02 2:10

I mean, not not even, I mean, majority of our kids don't even know what to do.

SPEAKER_04 2:13

That's a good point. Uh oh. Just me take now that I'm old, I can take shots at old people and younger people. Once you hit a certain, I teeter both lines. So I also noticed that you don't do the singing warm-up anymore to check your mic since you've gone headphone less on the podcast. Sean, have you noticed that? He doesn't do it anymore. Oh, yeah. That was one of my favorite things ever.

SPEAKER_02 2:31

But I just I just I just trust Sean. You know, if we go out, I'd like he'll give us a little thumbs down or something like that. But you miss it?

SPEAKER_04 2:38

I do miss it a little bit. I'm sure you'll get your usual tagline in by the time we we end the podcast. But since uh since things are going so good for Chris, I wanted to just tap in on a couple things in my own personal life. Family's great, boys are flourishing, wife is still a saint, putting up with me on a daily basis. Justin, I know you suffer the same curse having a saint for a wife. Sean, same Chris to update everybody out there. He still is not married, no children, and we're 15 episodes in. We're still working on it. Our bonus, Sean, I think we said episode by the time episode 30 hits, we expect some positive movement from Chris. So we're halfway. Yeah, we're getting there. But uh life is good. You know, woke up today, planted my feet, gave thanks to God for another opportunity to start back in zero and spend some time with our people. Let's get to one of my favorite people who I feel like at certain points we've helped raise each other to an extent. Uh, my first year coaching at Catholic Central was the fall of 1998, and our guest was a senior on that team. And I can tell you, coming back, being out from your first year of college, it was a bit of baptism by fire with uh our guest and his classmates, who uh I would say was a very eccentric class here at Catholic Central, highly motivated, highly successful. And uh this is a class that love this place. They poured in endless amounts of spirit, their passion, their talents, whether it was on any type of athletic field in the class or in the hallways and really set the standard for a lot of classes to come. And our guest today is our head football coach. He's a 1990 alum of Catholic Central High School. He's a national champion from Grand Valley State University. He started cutting his chops in the streets of Dearborn, Michigan, running three-on-three basketball tournaments with Hype Athletics. He blew that up into a business, eventually built a facility in Dearborn with Hype Athletics, and then took his talents out to the Legacy Center in Brighton, where he completely blew that place up with the Gobble Brothers. Everything from seven-on-seven flag football now has a national platform that you help create. I remember when you talked about building that seven-on-seven platform when you first came to Legacy. So our guest today is someone who has poured into Catholic Central, into the youth athletics platform for years, servant leader. I've been blessed to watch him become a grown man to an extent. I think all three of us, all four of us, are still still grown up a little bit, but I've got to watch him grow up as a man, as a man of faith, as a husband. And I think one of the favorite things I've got to see him become as a father, because people here at Catholic Central take a lot of pride in who they are and the fire that they walk around with. But when you have kids, it changes you. When people you have love have kids, it changes you. I know, Chris, you're the same with my kids, and when Justin's daughters are here. But before I go any further, I want to introduce somebody who I hold near and dear to my heart. He's become a mentor of mine, he's become a friend of mine, he's a co-worker. We're in the trenches together. He's our head football coach, and he's fresh off of the 2025 Division I football state championship. The first one we brought back home in 16 years, ladies and gentlemen, head football coach, Catholic Central alum, former national champion, Coach Justin Cassante. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 5:47

Thank you. Man, they're making it. Appreciate the flowers. That's awesome. And uh as you introduce all these things, and and and I think the older you get, and the more humility and respect you get, you get almost embarrassed by those things because you know uh all was given to you by the grace of God. And and a lot of uh a lot of people in this day and age want to talk about your accolades and your success. And I and obviously I do appreciate it. I know it's relevant relative to the podcast, but uh a lot of people don't talk about the failures, and uh uh, you know, those are things I always keep fresh in my mind, not only to to keep the humility uh and keep humble, uh, but but to understand how important those are to get where I'm at today, and that God always has a plan. And uh that plan is not always gonna be a smooth, paved road, uh paved road. You know, it's it's gonna be a lot of his ups and downs, and everywhere we come from, North Airborne Heights, uh, you know, uh we come from everything that you might decide to make a comment there. No, I got you. Yeah, yeah, it's my time, right? So uh, and and everything my family has been through and I've been through in my life to set me up and put me back here as a servant leader and ministry, uh, much more than a football coach is a true blessing. So thank you for having me on. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_04 7:00

We talk about non-scripted stuff here on this podcast because I don't want people, and Chris doesn't, we don't want people to prepare, you know, pre-made responses, which you know people can do. Yeah, yeah. They can come up with something, some line of BS. We want pure and raw emotion. One thing we do here is called the two-minute you. And I know it's tough for CC guys to talk about themselves in two minutes because the four of us could probably go a good half hour. Yeah. But tell us in two minutes who Justin Cesante is. What makes you tick and what makes you who you are?

SPEAKER_01 7:28

I'm a man of God, I'm a man of faith instilled by uh the two most important people in my life at the time, my mother and my grandmother. Uh I'm a single mother household kid, uh, a kid that I think grew up tough, uh, grew up in a diverse area, uh, a kid that that went through a lot of trials and tribulations, but it set me up to be at a at a just amazing place at Catholic Central that that found me spiritually, that God led me to uh in a time that I wouldn't thought of. Uh I'm an athlete uh or a former athlete. Uh I'm I'm a man that finds athletics as an equation for success, a foundation, but uh all of those things have have, you know, uh, you know, maybe a little bit of a tough guy, a little bit of a temperament, emotional, uh passionate. Uh, but but if you keep all those things in in uh in line with with faith and and family, I'm I'm definitely a family man first now. Uh you know, that is a priority for me. I'm a father, I'm a husband, um, and that that's the most important thing to me. And uh and then somebody who serves through ministry of of you know this school and uh this football program. And also outside of that, uh I hope a community leader, I hope somebody that you look at me, that I I rest on principles of respect uh and morals, uh, but I also uh a hard worker, you know, a hard worker. And I keep my circle tight. Uh I don't mess with everybody, uh, and that's okay. Uh some people dislike me for that, that's fine. Uh that doesn't mean they're right or wrong. It's just uh I I always uh keep the people I trust and the people I keep around me. Uh I'm a very loyal person. I grew up in a loyal community. Uh I really grew up between uh a black and Arab community. Uh I'm I'm Polish and Sicilian. So uh I've just grown up around a lot of people that once you're you're you you have each other's back, you have it for life. And uh so I'm blessed to have that. And I'm a shamrock, you know, forever. You know, live and die for CC High.

SPEAKER_04 9:20

You know, I think one thing that the four of us have in common, and and Sean, I don't think for you coming to CC wasn't always something you dreamed about as a younger child, right? No, yeah, that's right. Chris, same thing with you. You kind of ended up here by getting to know Brian Cheney a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 9:33

I would I would say it was definitely like kid, kid like me from West Detroit. I was definitely a dream going on the website, kind of seeing same. So it wasn't predestined. You were oh yeah, no, no. I just remember seeing the website the first time I heard of it and seeing Sam Landry and Butch Herzog. It was fresh out of the O9s championship and seeing the band and seeing people in London. You know, I just never seen anything like that at his school level, and seeing national merit scholars along with state championship banners, along with Christian service, 10,000 hours, uh like school combined. So, I mean, it was for me, it was definitely like this like place far away, this kingdom, this heaven that, you know, I had never heard of or seen. So that was definitely a little more, a little bit more important and special to me when I first saw this place.

SPEAKER_04 10:16

It still feels like that when you get in here, like it is a small slice of heaven. I mean, you know, we were off on spring break, and then Justin, you go right on the college bus tour with how many of our players? 52. 52 players on a college bus tour. How many schools? Uh, 15 in five days. 15 schools in five days. Not much of a break in downtime for you there, but a place where you can decompress with our boys, build a ton of unity, which I think is the best thing about that trip. I mean, getting to spend that much time together with the kids. You grew up in an area where traditionally there weren't a ton of CC kids going to Catholic Central. Same as me being from South Dearborn Heights. What was it that drew you to this place, or what made you realize this is something different than than I was even looking for?

SPEAKER_01 10:57

Well, there's two things. I think, you know, um, I got shuffled around from where I grew up on Telegraph and Joy Road. So there's times we went, you know, we're Detroit schools and Dearborn Heights schools that eventually, that was what it was, then the Dearborn schools. And when I got over, you know, a lot of my friends did have their fathers involved. And there was uh, I don't want to say politics, but you feel uh as an outsider, uh, as you're the only one that's uh getting dropped off by mom and don't have dad in the crew. So uh that that that always made me feel a different way, maybe a little bit insecure about how I moved or more, a little bit more conscious. Uh what really opened my eyes to Catholic Central, and I talked about it the state of the school was John Spolski came over to drop off Westside football flyers. I mean, you know, not recruiting, just dropping off these flyers for the youth camp. And I met him uh through through another guy I knew, uh Mike Creetu. And uh, you know, uh, but I saw John and he he had this charisma and presence like was no other. I mean, I thought he was a college football player, he might have been a sophomore in high school. And I started following Catholic Central because of John Spulski, God rest his soul. And uh one of the greatest Shamrocks, if not the greatest ever, you know, ever put the pads on and walk these halls. And uh I started following them in the newspaper. I started asking around about them frequently, about Catholic Central, about what it stood for. And you just found out that it just the reputation and the excellence, uh, you know, was what the school was all about. Uh you had to read in the newspaper at that time. They were always in the newspaper for something. And I definitely was following the football program. And I was drawn there by God. I mean, there's no doubt about it. I remember walking in uh to Old Breakfast Drive for the first open house. And the first man I met was Tom Mack in the weight room. And I remember seeing the sign, God's gift to you is your talent, your gift to uh God is what you do with it. And it just you could smell the tradition literally, and uh, you know, uh you could feel the presence of spirit and and and and that the place was just special. And uh from from that day on, I knew I was gonna be a shamrock along as I could get through my summer school classes and and make it through uh not beating somebody up or something like that. So, you know, summer school.

SPEAKER_04 12:59

Oh yeah, yeah, me too. Sean, summer skills for you? No, whatever. Oh, yeah, get out of here. Whatever, Sean. Yeah, you're not welcome. You're not welcome. Yeah, yeah, good answer, Sean. You know, like you said though, coming from that area. Now you touched on following them in the newspaper. For you youngsters out there, the newspaper is something you used to get printed articles in, you would open, you could read it, not just click online and like doom scroll and stuff like that. But in your area, I know that a lot of people around there, much like from where I was coming from, Chris. Same same with you. They had you tab to go to a specific local high school. Yeah. When you decided to go to Catholic Central, how did some of those relationships change?

SPEAKER_01 13:40

Because I know they did. Yeah, I mean, you know, uh the very unique thing about my life is my friends. Uh, I have friends from kindergarten, and uh, there's a group of 20 of us from the Detroit Dearborn Heights, Dearborn area uh that are still close to this day, which is pretty awesome. I mean, a lot of people can't say that at 45. Shout out to Wilk, shout out to Sam, all those guys, Carlos Samurai, Keith McKay, all those guys, man, Hasimaki, Mobad, Yusuf, all these guys I still talk to all the time. Shammies. Get our families together, yeah. The Salas, all those guys, man, Barries. But um, you know, uh, when when I made that decision, I, you know, I I I dealt with some adults in the community first that, you know, our class went undefeated for two years in every sport. So that they were a special class that made runs in high school. And so uh I was the first one to kind of break them up per se. And uh even my mother asked, you know, when I said I want to go to Catholic Central, she said, why? You know, like you're happy, you got some of your best friends, you guys are phenomenal at sports, and you're walking away from all that. And um, I just, you know, when you grow up in a single mother household, you know, my grandmother and mom did as much as they could, but eventually you need a father figure, and that's what Catholic Central became to me. And I think that that's what uh God worked, you know, in the background to lead me home to this place, to have that discipline, to have that father figure and coaches and priests and teachers. And that's exactly what it did for me. And so I am less less personal about Darborn schools or my friends or my neighborhood or a lot of things that I seen growing up. It was, I think, something that was instilled to me and led to me by the Holy Spirit uh to be here because a lot of things had to go right and I had to get through a lot of adversity uh to finish here and then obviously be back as a head football coach.

SPEAKER_04 15:28

I think that's what's special about this place, especially in my position, or even in a coaching position, or even in Chris, who doesn't coach but is a coach to so many different kids. You get to see people come back. And like for me, like I've seen so much growth in you from the time you were a senior here and been a part of a little bit of the journey and just us being friends and as close as we are and growing a lot together over the years. I mean, not always making you being completely honest, not always making the best decisions when we were younger and helping each other get our feet back underneath us. Chris, when you left your area, did you feel the same thing? Did you feel like they had me tab to go to this specific high school, or did they already know that you were planning on doing something different? So for me, uh Kathleen Stranger was my first example.

SPEAKER_02 16:11

Oh, so I was east side of Detroit, then the west side of Detroit, then back to the west side of Detroit, and then Wayne Westland for a year and a half. So I never knew what was coming next, and kind of being more of a lone whiff kind of guy, similar to Justin in a sense where I was a little bit ashamed of kind of like my circumstances. So I never really got close to people in in middle school or elementary school or really cultivated relationships because they're getting dropped off by by two parents. You know, they're they have a family, everyone's coming to the games, the mom, the dad. And so I was a lot more bouncing between areas. Yeah, I was a lot more, I was a lot more private. So yeah, I don't I don't think people really ever had me like tab to go anywhere. I just knew that similar to what Coach Asante experienced, the reason why we came here is because my mother always said she wanted me to have some consistent male leadership and consistent male mentorship, irregardless of what she had going on romantically at the time. And so that's why I mean this place became so so special to me. And, you know, seeing you guys who have always been great stewards of what this place represented, what it means and what happens to a young man when they come through these doors, but more importantly, the young men that turn into fathers and husbands that we produce to go into society. So that's one of the biggest things for me. I mean, when I came here, I just thought it was just a blessing from God, it was just a miracle. That was more of what the experience was for me.

SPEAKER_01 17:32

It was amazing how many people put in doubt or or doubted what I was capable of doing here, and how many people wanted to tell me about that, whether it was directly or indirectly. And I remember that, and I I I remember that's exactly why I'm coming here. Is because you know, I I only have to prove it myself. Yep. And uh, you know, the one thing that, and and I tell all the young men this is is how hard, you know, are you going to work? You know, if you have that staple, I mean it's really hard to stop you when you're on a relentless pursuit to to do something. And uh, you know, there was times I I walked out of this school, I didn't want to come back, I almost flunked out, you know. I mean, I was in culture shock. Um, but I I and at times probably did to do it despite the the naysayers. Um, but but that's all that all goes into your your emotional growth and maturity uh as you're trying to find your way on a path that's that's not be traveled right by everybody, right?

SPEAKER_04 18:28

I think people I think people are too egotistical to show that side to say, hey, I almost got kicked out of Catholic Central, or I had to take all three summer school classes just to get back in. I know the story about you getting back in and who talked you into it. Can you touch on that story about when you tried to leave and a certain administrator pulled you in and said, Justin, we ain't going anywhere?

SPEAKER_01 18:46

Yeah, no, I I walked out of Miss Sharkey's class, who's still one of my favorite people in the world, and I'm very close with her to this day. She was a religious teacher. And uh something happened as regards to like the last straw for me. It had to do with athletics. I was really struggling in school just to find the consistency and uh understanding what I needed to do to be successful. But I had to tutor at the time. I was starting to pick it up, I was starting to find my way. And then something happened inside of uh uh football, and and I just had enough. And I walked out, I shook all my friends' hands that were in the class, and uh, walked out. Uh, I remember driving home, you know, sobbing, and uh I was actually on the phone. We had the old, you know, phones that you you might you know, somebody could beep in if they were calling you, right? But that was about it. But they they still had the court on them. And I I called Dareborne literally as I walked in. And uh I was on the phone with their office basically, you know, how how do I transfer? You know, how what is this process? I was dead set. And and honestly, walking out of Catholic Central at that time, probably getting expelled. Um, if you just walk out of school like that, you know, it was definitely a stern environment and and and a lot of discipline and not not a lot of leeway. And I remember getting uh two calls, you know, it was it was Coach Grewey and and uh Mr. Lewis, and just said, What are you doing? You know, you and you're a shamrock. You know, you you know, and and uh, you know, it still gets me emotional to this day because to be 15 years old and making a a change in your life to look back of where would my life be today? What would I be doing? I I don't really don't know. I really don't know. And and so that those conversations, and it wasn't because I was some five-star football player, honestly. Like I was still finding my way to see if I was gonna be a guy or not. Nobody was giving me a scholarship, nobody was baking on me of doing something that they could then take advantage of or that would benefit them. They did it because they saw something in me that I didn't see in myself. And they saw that I was I was working hard to get there and that I fit this place and this place fit me. And if they didn't do that, I was gone. You know, my mom wasn't stopping me. Uh Tim Henry was involved in that as well, obviously. Uh, you know, Gene Grewey and and uh and and Dave Lewis. And uh if they don't make those calls, if they don't reach out to somebody, take time out of their day, and instead of, you know, probably back in the day was interaction was yelling at you or saying, fine, you know, this guy's expelled, and how do we discipline this or how do we make sure he doesn't come back? Uh they reeled me back in and obviously saved my life, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_04 21:14

The personality of those two people, though, when you think about how much time we've gotten to spend with them over the years, it doesn't surprise you. Once you get to know a Gene Grewey and a Dave Lewis and other people, sometimes they give off that tough exterior, but on the inside, they're just like us. Like we all like to walk around like we're a little bit tougher than we are, but I don't hate saying this on here. I'm a big crier. If something hits me in the emotions, I'm gonna start balling. Yeah, I know you're the exact same way. Chris, we haven't gotten you to crack too much emotionally.

SPEAKER_02 21:40

I I don't want I'm I I don't really play into the whole like tough guy, like I don't know. It is something a little bit something. I'm more you're more like the vibes guy. I'm more into a couple dance. Yeah, I'm more like video. I just remind people when I was in I was raised in the trap and the country club. So when I was when I was in high school, I mean I think I was high hockey and lacrosse kids, so a lot of my when I was being Like fundamentally kind of like built, you know, irregardless of coming from, you know, what happens in high school kind of really formed your personality, you know. Um, and so even though I was from the inner city, when I got here, I just naturally attached more to like those hockey lacrosse for some reason. Yeah, those like that just were always kind of my type of guys. And so I was kind of more of a swaggy guy than like the whole, I'm not gonna say anybody's fake tough, but like the whole like just super tough meathead. It was like I always believe that you know there's a difference between you know your personality type and your leadership style. So I may joke and mess around, but I'm still gonna live more than you and still like play well and work hard and come in first and conditioning drills. And I don't I don't believe the whole provado thing is necessary for for everyone, unless that's just genuinely your personality type. Like that just wasn't mine. I could vibe and have fun with coach and we can laugh and we can joke and then we can go lock in and give an amazing speech to change moves live. That's what family's all about.

SPEAKER_01 22:55

Maybe how it should be. Yeah. Yeah, that was a thing here. I I mean, I'm from a place of confrontation. I mean, where I grew up, my my family. I mean, I I, you know, uh, as far as being a tough guy, like you had to prove it every day in my neighborhood. And and, you know, what I consider tough now compared to what I thought was tough when I was a teenager or in college is way different. Uh, tough toughness is about consistency, it's about empathy, uh, it's about passion, uh, it's about directing your intensity in the right manner and how you treat people ultimately, how you make others feel. Uh, because that's tough. That's tough to consistent, consistently do that with everything else going on in your life, to manage your time and to manage your relationships. But but that's tough. But I think this place really humbled me in that, you know. Like, I mean, you know, my you know, you can't come over here and just deal with things that you dealt with in the neighborhood, you know. Somebody said something you didn't like or somebody you know is pressing on you in a way. You can deal with it, you just can't deal with it the same way. Yeah, yeah. Now, now our we grew up in a different era. There was still, you know, some good fist fights at the old school and whatnot, but you know, it's a different, different world, which we you know, it's just fine. But um, you know, it it definitely allowed me to have some emotional maturity here to understand that there's boundaries and limitations, and that not everything has to be dealt with violence. And that I obviously it's even better if it's not. There, there's always a you know, unless you're defending yourself, right? So it's funny. I'm we're I'm I'm I'm reading this book uh from uh the Navy SEAL uh and I can't believe it, it's Warrior Kid. Oh, Jocko Willis. Yeah, Jacko Willis, yeah. So I'm wearing Warrior Kid right now. We're talking about being able, you know, I'll put my middle daughter in jujitsu. She's got a lot of energy, and uh, you know, that it's great that you can defend yourself, but you want to try to avoid uh that at all costs. So Catholic Central was that for me.

SPEAKER_04 24:38

Which daughter are we putting in jujitsu?

SPEAKER_02 24:40

Stella. Yeah, yeah, Estella, yeah. All right, so we have to have a little transparency session because me and me and him have laughed about this consistently, probably for like five years. So you did a great job of explaining your quotes because I have I have given an Obama quote, a Miangelou quote, like a doctor. I've attributed a lot of quotes as like you saying them. Yeah, but he always says correct me. So I'm so happy you finally you're like, okay, no, this quote I got from because there's about like five quotes, and like I've done speeches all across the country. And I'm like, and and and and and coachesante once said, and like I would always say it, I would always say it, and then one day, like Abbott's calls me, he goes, He goes, You know, you know Maya Angelus, but but but she have a big pants now.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

So like what your which one of the things the message got through. Which one of your quotes that you you you've said, like, hey, like this is a good thing.

SPEAKER_02 25:31

So the first one that I always bring up is you know, people will never remember like like what you said, like what you did, like what how much money you had, they remember how you made them feel. Yeah, like that's one that I always use. Uh the other one I use, I speak about obviously, you know, bring your lunch pro to work, you work, you work, you work all week. The weight room quote you use a lot, the butts in the weight room. Yeah, the God's gift to you.

SPEAKER_04 25:54

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Oh, like that's like in like in that's in my books. I lead a ton of speeches with that. I always thought that was uh God's gift to you is life, your gift to God is what you do with your life. Um and then the greatest gift you can give to God is you know, it's just focusing on getting better. I always share with people. And I always I've attributed that. Well, I just grabbed the batonics.

SPEAKER_01 26:13

Definitely not smart enough to make any of those up. I I think I think for me, like, you know, as you read books and as you're around your mentors and as you're uh, you know, one of the things even Brian Kelly uh always sticks with me. And I tell the boys, like, it's not our job to notice you, it's your job to get noticed. But all those are, you know, you you watch Nick Sabin or you you read about Vince Lombardi, like uh in a lot of stuff that Coach Mac had pulled from was a lot of Vince Lombardi stuff, you know, Pill Pier uh Paul Bear Bryant, you know, uh things of that nature. But like it's how it's how you pass them on and how you make them relative to your relationships and your story inside of your program or your organization, right? And that that they mean something, you know. That's at the end of the day, like this is the most important time for me as a football coach, you know, and it and look, we we we know how to play the branding game, and and it's because we want to do things the right way and we want kids to want to come here because we pour into them and resource. Um, but you know, as far as what we did on the college bus tour, what we just did in Las Vegas, what we do at team camp, what we do with our senior retreats, we're connecting. You know, we're building a substance, we're building a ground to stand on that actually means something. And there's there's been two compliments that I've had at this at this school since I've I was blessed to be uh, you know, the head football coach and and Aaron, you know, pushing me to put my resume in. Um it it's we we've prayed more in this program and not just prayer and not to ever demean the Hail Mary, our father, but trying to teach the young men how to speak to God and how to listen. Uh, and also that we play really hard for each other. And that's because we spend a lot of time together. And the time spent is structured enough, or you have an eye or a thumb on the pulse to understand what it's supposed to do. Now, when it doesn't, how do you deal with that? You know, and and and luckily, uh being here, you know, going into fourth year, we haven't had that issue. But you watch these kids bond on this trip, you watch them get outside their clicks, you get watch them uh learn a little bit more about each other than just, you know, that that's my boy, and I like hanging out with them, uh, maybe learning some scar tissue and some things to build a relationship on that means something, you know, and not get too far away from that. But you know, that a lot of those quotes, you know, this past year, I worked more on our prayers for team prayer before games, our team messages. I mean, I really got into the lab. And because you don't want your team to get on this emotional roller coaster and you want to keep them on task. And you also want to identify what the weaknesses and strengths are and what you need to focus on. So this year, the football part is is is easy. You always continue to learn. You have great coaches around you. I coach two positions. I have my my, you know, I'm involved in a little bit of everything, but how are you engaging, keeping motivated, and connecting all the stuff you did in the offseason and to continue that that workflow through the through the football season? That's the challenge. You know, that that that's the hard part because you have to, you're responsible for a lot of people and a lot of personalities that you got to get them all on the bus and moving in one direction for the same mission with one result. Yep. You know, one result.

SPEAKER_04 29:16

So not easy to do.

SPEAKER_01 29:18

No, no, it's not.

SPEAKER_04 29:19

I think one thing that you've changed in the program that other coaches have started to do as well. And Mitch Mitch Hancock was doing this as well before, doing team camps.

SPEAKER_03 29:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:27

I know you guys go up to Hope College now on a yearly basis. This will be our third season coming up doing it.

SPEAKER_01 29:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:32

Third season coming up. And when you talk about peeling the layers of the onion back, I'm always amazed at the stories the kids come back with. Uh you'll always tell me just how and and everybody outside of the hallways here at Catholic Central thinks that these kids are all rich and they have everything. Two parent households. When we know the truth, yeah, when they leave this place, that's when real life starts for them. We probably said it on every single podcast.

SPEAKER_02 29:53

Oh, I know, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:54

One thing I think you've done a good job with with our football program and other programs you've worked with, and other kids you've been able to come in contact with is meeting them where they are. When you guys go to that team camp, touch on some of the special things you guys are able to share there outside of football.

SPEAKER_01 30:07

I I heard I heard this great uh I saw the saying, I think it was at Rucker's, put your shield down. You know, my put your shield down means is if you want to be a great leader or you want to be a great teammate, you want to be a great brother, uh, put your shield down, open up yourself to be vulnerable. And uh what that allows me as a football coach, and where I transition from assistant with my man here to you know what I believe I I've transitioned in today is I'm able to speak with the kids and not at them because I am vulnerable and probably share some things that I'm embarrassed about or I don't want to share, but I never want to wear this halo that that doesn't exist. I don't want to ever pretend that I'm perfect. If I'm struggling, you know I I told the kids on the bus tour, I came in and I said, uh my wife, you know, she feels like a single, single mother right now. Um my my two of my kids were crying, I wasn't home. They were up till 11:30 at night. I've been gone a lot, and and I got I got emotional bound. I want to share I don't feel like a good husband and a good father right now. And I want I and it's not to make you guys feel bad or to to to put me in a in a situation where I need to be celebrated for it. I'm just telling you, like, I go through hard days too, and like my family's making a sacrifice for to be here, and your family's making a sacrifice for you to be here. So what are we gonna do with it? What are we gonna do with it? Are we gonna be on our phones the whole time? Are we are we are we gonna are we gonna find ourselves? Are we gonna find our personality as the as a team? And you you know, you know, getting up in front of them and and and we had two alumni in the cut ready to to speak to them, which was an awesome addition to what we were doing. Um, but but but that they get to see you're a real person that goes through real emotions every day. You're not sitting up here as this fake tough guy, or sitting up here with this halo or Mr. Perfect, or it's about you. It's not, it's about how how can I share whatever I'm going through so you become a better man, or when you have to deal with something as a son or a brother uh that you can navigate through.

SPEAKER_04 31:55

Sometimes working with these kids can heal you. Like if you're going through it, being around these kids or walking into this building and being around our people, like just being on spring break and being away from the kids for two weeks sucks. There's no, you come back in the building, there's no energy. I mean, you see your people and stuff like that. From year one, now you're entering your fourth season, correct? Yes, sir. So from year one to year four going in, what have you seen the biggest change in?

SPEAKER_01 32:20

What are we gonna do? Well, what are we gonna do? You know, number one, as much as we believe we do for this place, this place does triple for us, right? Uh it's made me a better father, it's made me a better husband, it's made me closer and spiritual faith. And I learned something more about myself every single day because of these young men and the people in this building. Um, I think from year one to year four, you know, I had the anxiety of how are we going to breed toughness? How are we gonna execute this plan that I sat in front of the committee and said that we were going to accomplish? And I want it now. I patience is not my virtue. You know, I am not I'm not a patient person. And and and you know, it's crazy. I was talking to Miss Sharky to come full circle that first year. I was sitting um upstairs. I think my my one of my daughters was just born, or she was young, and she's running around. And I said to Miss Sharky, I said, you know, um, you know, sometimes I think that that my fire and and and and temperament can get the best of me. And she goes, Hold on, Justin, that that's that's your blessing. Don't let it be your curse. You know, so use that fire, just understand how to control it. And so going in and understanding that I had to wait for this to take time and you have to build a culture and that you have to literally connect with every young man and coach in your program. I mean, that's the difference. It's happening now in a cycle that makes sense for us. Uh, we know what to expect, but it's still an individual each and every time that you have to connect with so that you know how to coach them, you know what they're going through, and you can get the best version of themselves. Whether the last guy on the bench or a five-star, it doesn't matter. They're all relative to the success of this school and the program. And understanding that and engaging in that process, we come from the old school, yes sir, no, sir. You're not walking down that old breakfast drive hallway to the coach's office unless your hair was on fire. And sweaty, nervous. Yeah, when we had, yeah, and you're still nervous, whether you're a captain or a freshman. Um, I think that that like learning how to connect and continue to be engaged in that process is intense. Uh, it can be exhausting, you know. Uh I my my players can call me at 11 o'clock at night or or one in the morning if they needed to. Uh, if they need me, yeah, I'll be there. And understanding that they know it's a real open door, that that we are not just saying that, but that the actions are behind it.

SPEAKER_04 34:34

So I mean, I think we see a lot of people too, and it's not to cut down other programs, but it just happens everywhere. They throw a saying up on a wall, they put a saying on a t-shirt. This is our theme for the year, but then there's nothing to stand on or stand behind that at all. I think that's one thing we do really well here in football and in other programs. And Chris, one thing that he touched on, you've always said in our podcast that there were people here that cared about you because of who you were, not because you were a football player and a young man or a lacrosse player. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm saying it in public. Or a lacrosse player for a short amount of time. We always looked at you as a young man first. Did you always feel like that here? Like these guys just don't want a piece of me because I'm a big kid. They actually care about me as a whole person.

SPEAKER_02 35:14

Oh, 1000%. I tell people that's why my experience here is very different than most. I believe the majority of my relationships were like that. From Oceante to you to the Mike Max, the Kevin Griffins, the Mr. Pedrovich, very minimal conversation. Bather humor. Father, my goodness, yeah. How could I dare forget him? He was, I mean, I had a similar kind of coming to Jesus moment, sitting down in his office uh discussing my my future here. And if it was the place to be, because I I got fed up, man, coming from where I was from, you know, I don't know if you guys can relate to this, but when you're young, like that 13 or 14, I think, you know, once you hit that like into sophomore year, junior year, it gets a lot better for some reason. But when you're like a freshman or sophomore, that constant reminder, when you're insecure, that everyone here has a much better situation than me. Everyone's not not only like are like it's like your grades are better than mine, your family life. So like it makes you really question yourself or just being. Imagine a daily reminder every day that your situation, what are we gonna do? But the strength comes because you realize that even in the midst of adversity, that God is still God. And that He will take the least of thee and pull them in the front if you can endure during that adversity. And so learning that lesson has been one that has propelled me all throughout life, and that's why I'm able to just navigate against navigate against different sectors because I know that in order to win, you have to lose for a long time and cultivate those relationships, pour into people, learn from people, get wisdom from the elders. I know you hate when I say elders, but that's just kind of what I like. I'm getting more used to it. I mean, but that's what I mean, and that's irregular color. You know, whenever I hear you speak, Coach Sante speak, my mother speaks, uncle, I'm at the barber shop talking to one of them. You know, that those lessons you get from the elders, man, you can't take those things for granted. You know, some of the conversations that we had led to me being able to go on to college. And I appreciate Coach Asante for throwing this at Scientic Party. I know he probably forgets about it, but that was a monumental event. And it was guys that were D tubed uh all the way up to guys that were Division I four and five-star guys. And I mean, I remember it was muscle milky. They gave out hats. We had we had walk-in music. It was it made a little kid that you know came from nothing and came in, and there were people that thought he he maybe he wasn't gonna go anywhere or wasn't gonna make it. You know, that was kind of like a you know, like a like a major graduation for me.

SPEAKER_01 37:45

I mean, well, my my teammate, my teammate called me about you. He was at Ferris Ryan Brady, coach Ryan Brady, who's a you know, awesome, awesome guy, and uh said, you know, what do you think about Okoye? I love him. I said he's got tremendous potential, and I think he's just coming to his own. He might have bloomed a little late to understand what he has, but once he figures it out, it's gonna click. And I said, look, there's going to be a point, just like every freshman, you're gonna have to go kick down his door and you're gonna have to drag him around a little bit. And we all need that at times. But that that that's you know, but to go back to your point, like there's a point here where I felt the same exact way. I'm like, man, every like, do I even belong here? Like everybody has it. And and you know, you really don't know. And even in today with mass communication, social media, you're measuring yourself against way more people with a bunch of crap that's out there. But where it clicked for me going in my junior year is I was like, oh, I can change the ceiling of my family here.

unknown 38:36

That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 38:37

Yeah, yeah, I am surrounding myself with some people with better situations and more money and more opportunity and better grades and better athletes. But you know what? That's going to make me be more like that. And that is going to change my circumstances. Very clear. And when I figured that out, uh like I they the head was down, there was no more questioning. The tradition piece, and this is why it was so important to have our alumni uh and and and two two you know legendary brothers here at Yale speak to us and get emotional in front of 52 boys. Uh well, first of all, you you connect the alumni and and they remember that Catholic Central is just the same way now, and they see a lot of themselves in these young men. But I think you have to know where you've been in order to know where you go. So the more that we have alumni connect here and come back and be around, like even if they don't say much, the the players, the student athletes, the students, period, can feel that. But now you have them show up on the road. We had the Dankert brothers in Boston, you had the uh brothers in in Yale and in New Haven, and for them to get up and speak and especially the success that they've seen. And then when they talk about Catholic Central and that that was the foundation of success for them, and they get emotionally drawn from that experience, the kids are like, man, are they absorbing that? So they know exactly what the, you know, they might not completely understand what it's going to be for them in their future, but they're starting to realize, like, man, if these guys are up in front of us speaking like this, like we're getting this place catapult me. We're we're what am I learning right now that is going to make me different and make me strive for excellence while others aren't doing what I'm willing to do?

SPEAKER_04 40:11

Yeah, what else can I take advantage of? We have Jeff Whisk on here last week, two weeks ago, and he talked about his. We're like, what's your favorite memory? Like the biggest thing, biggest game he goes, not anything in the NFL, it's not anything in Michigan State, it's not the Browns versus Dolphins, not this game versus this game. He goes 100 times out of a hundred. You give me Tom Mack on one side, Alfred Costa on that other sideline, and I'm in heaven. Yeah. And that's how much it meant to somebody who's been at every level of professional sports, insanely successful as a business leader, businessman, manager, just people person, and human being. And his finest memory that he would just pay anything for would be to come back and play in a CC Rice football game.

SPEAKER_02 40:49

And it speaks to our great separator that I always speak about. And now you go and I speak to these universities, I speak to these other schools. The biggest distinction between Catholic Central and them, I believe in correct me if I'm wrong, we're the only instant learning institution. So I'm gonna go across all levels of education where your most successful and pristine alums can't leave the books. Yeah, you got the Tomies, Mike, Miska, Whiskey, the Mahalik brothers, Turik, you, you like people that are are are like we don't like our most successful alums never close the eyes down. Why do you think that is? It's because of the culture that we've that we've that we created here. And I believe that some of their best uh emotional, I believe when you leave here, from a from a materialistic wealth standpoint, like there's more. There's a ton of growth you begin to experience. From all you much more vanity metrics, thousands percent. Nothing wrong with that. But I believe some of your your best relationship building experiences occur here. Some of your best like family bonding moments occurred here. So because everything else is so so like like temporary, you know. In college, people leave, people come, they go, especially with the portal professional level, uh, whether it's sports, whether it's business, people get fired, people leave, people come and go. But now you have but now you have organic uh relationships, people from different backdrops, different walks of life that don't have to talk to each other. But now you're doing it, yeah. And they're forced to because at the end of the day, you're a child, and you come here to become a man. And so you're taught when you meet someone, you pour into them. One of the things you say, how's your day going? I was re-listening to one of our other podcasts, and it's we teach people that you pour before you critique. You construct before you deconstruct. You figure out who is this person, where are they from? What makes them tick? But now you were talking, man, it brought it brought chills in my body because I remember hitting that exact same frame when I was a junior, and people ask, what was the best moment of my life? But now you have now you have it was when I got inducted into the Catholic League Hall of Fame because I remember feeling like I didn't belong at all. And that was for the first time in my life. I was like, I was God genuinely put me at CC for a reason because I listened to what he said, but now I wanted to do, I let his will be done and not my will be done. A place where I didn't think I belonged, like I now get to become a part of it for the rest of my life. And then being back here, us all coming back here, you know, and and sometimes I do think it kind of feeds that little kidnapped sometimes when we get to when we get to come back here. And and now it's not a question of do we belong, but it's bringing others into the fold and giving them that same life experience that we know is gonna turn them into better men for society. One of the things that um Ed always says is that the world is genuinely better, uh genuinely a better place with more Sharon Rock Senate, and the lessons that you learn and the skills that you cultivate while here, irregardless of personality type, just makes you a much finer, sharpened human being.

SPEAKER_01 43:52

Well, let's say I to take from that, I think that um nobody takes great pride, especially if they put a brick. In the foundation. So if you, you know, I tell these kids all, how are you going to feel walking down these hallways in five, 10, 20 years? How are you going to feel when you walk past your teammates? They're going to say, Man, I missed that guy, or man, I'm glad I don't see that guy. But there's that pride and then that responsibility to pay it forward and pay it back. I mean, I have a great responsibility to play the pay this place back and how I impact the people around me that I'm blessed to every single day. The other thing is we're familiar, the familiarity with the alumni that we went through something hard. You know, we had a dinner out in California, Mike Martin and I with a bunch of alumni that couldn't have been from the more different classes as far as just growing up socioeconomically backgrounds, what they were doing for a living. I mean, everything from aerospace to uh shooting uh Hollywood movies, you know, the whole nine. We you we sat around like we've known each other for years because there was a familiarity that poured into what our experience at Catholic Central and how much it did do for us and how much it does still play a part, uh, whoever that person was in the school and/or that quote that hit us or that experience and some of that scar tissue because it's hard. The familiarity is that it was hard, you know? And uh I I think I think that all plays into what our tradition is. You know, having 60 alumni involved with the school on a daily basis right now, um, having those alumni still get emotional about their experience. And uh, you know, some people will look at it and say, oh, what a bunch of losers. Their best time of their life was high school. It's not about being the best time of our life. Best time of our life is having our kids or getting married or a professional success or, you know, duck the hull fate, whatever it may be. What it was is it was a surefire foundation that was created that we would always lean back to. No matter how bad my life was, I knew bad decisions I made or trouble I was in, I knew I could reflect back that, man, when I was 15 and 16, I would overachieve, I could engage in the process, I could work harder than anybody, I could have good spiritual faith, I could make good decisions. So why can't I do it now at 21? Why can't I do it now at 45?

SPEAKER_02 46:05

It's our foundation. Yeah. I believe like goodness, discipline, knowledge is not a saying, it's it's genuinely a way of life. I tell people It's in the Bible. Yeah. I tell people all the time. One of the most beautiful aspects of Catholic censure is this. Number one, we have the most national merit scholars, but we also went to championships. And we also have the most community Christian service hours. That is my is the the ultimate building. Or I wouldn't have any young women, but just what a what a what a child of God should be. You don't have to pick an area. When you come here, it's mental, physical, spiritual, and you don't get to slacken out of the category. You know, you like I always love that when you walk down the hallways, there's a direct correlation between our scholars and our athletes. And I'm not saying that every athlete here was a 4.0 student, because I know I wasn't. I can't speak for I know I know none of us were in here. No. No. Except maybe Sean. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 47:02

Sean. We can bond over that one.

SPEAKER_02 47:03

Yeah. But when I see like the Benny Azukas, I see like the Jag Jans, I see these guys, and I see their grades, and then I see how the type of young man they are in their community, and I see a guy like Jack Dorgan who goes out and wins a business within the same 24 hours, wins a business conference, then turns around and wins a state championship game, and then turns around and helps his other buddies as they start their own business and they're knitting sweaters and doing gift packages to give back to the community. Now a lacrosse manager. And then being a lacrosse manager, all while being a first team off-stater. You don't see that anywhere else, man. And then him like him not being an outlier. You could I could pick another another guy like Jack in soccer, in lacrosse, and football, in DECA, and band and the media club. But now you don't you don't get that. Every other place is like good old 90s stereotype. Let's shove the jocks or shoving guys in lockers. Oh, I can't read, man. Do my do my homework. Or no, a guy that binges the most might have the highest IQ here. And he also might be an altar boy at service. And you can't make that type of stuff up.

SPEAKER_04 48:08

I had a parent ask me the other day, her son plays baseball with Brooksy, and she's like, Well, what's Catholic Central like? I said, Catholic Central is a place for any type of young man that wants to work hard.

SPEAKER_03 48:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:18

Very simple. Now we're a place where some kids who might be a little bit on the might be a little bit of an outlier, maybe a little quirky, they might go to another high school and they might be a target. At this place, we celebrate kids like that. Like you'll get your biggest, you know. I look, like you said, you mentioned Benny Azuka. Benny leaves a semester, full semester early. He left over Christmas. Within the first month there, he was student of the week at Virginia Tech. Really, as a high school senior, but that shows you the foundation these kids get here. One saying that I always like to use is that we're standing on the shoulders of giants. Justin, you touched on it earlier. We still we steal little things from our mentors, from the people that meant the most to us. I feel like we got spoiled because we had Coach Mack here. One of the original, before people were even using the word culture in programs, Coach Mack was culture.

SPEAKER_02 49:05

I had Coach Mac too.

SPEAKER_04 49:06

The magic is in believing. I pointed all three of us. The magic is in believing. The wham never loses yardage. For me, I always think of that like I think of everything like running the wham. All right, this might be a tough yard to get, but I ain't losing yardage on it. No doubt. I'm putting my head if I got a block on it, I'm double teaming and blowing that guy back. If I'm running the ball, I'm getting that yard. But that's the kind of thing I think that we were built with. One thing you touched on earlier, and I remember our conversation. It was after we lost to Castech last year in a heartbreaker, a year before we win the state title.

SPEAKER_01 49:32

No joke.

SPEAKER_04 49:33

I don't remember this game. I blacked out a little bit from the game, but I remember some of the conversations after, and you were down, and everybody here was crushed because we feel like we let one slip a little bit. But now I remember you saying to me, and you put your head down when you said it. You said, I feel like I have to be a better father. And I remember saying to you, Justin, maybe that's the one thing missing from this whole thing. Maybe that's the reason we couldn't get over. There's always some little thing. Finding balance. The right balance. And you found more this year. Yeah. And I feel like you had more fun. I feel like you weren't as anxiety-based. You were tighter with the kids than ever before. And it ended up working out. Now, I don't think that was the reason, but I do think it makes you realize in failure.

SPEAKER_01 50:12

You make you realize and self-reflect to a point that you know you can let it be destructive or you can let it let it help you grow. And honestly, I I I know this in life now. I've just, you know, I'm I know I'm 45, but you know, well-weathered 45. You know, God does not give you things. He does not, in my opinion, if you're spiritually aligned with him, does not give you things you are not ready for. But now, yeah, we could have won the state championship in year two, would it have deteriorated our program? Would it have been too soon? Were we ready for not just the kids, not the suit, but but as a as a program. And if you told me I had to take these two lumps in order to have 10 years or 15 years of success compared to having the immediate, and then you're gonna fall off, you're gonna deteriorate. I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna take the long term, take the less everything. Yeah, and so so you you know, I I truly believe that then, all right, well, God had something to teach you, you know, you and your program. You and then sometimes things just don't work out, right? Like, and and you make mistakes as a as a leader and you you you don't make the right decisions or you don't prepare them right mentally, and and you learn from it. Like, are you gonna are you gonna get defeated? Are you know, and look, we all go through our episodes. You gotta sometimes take time to mourn. You know, you have to address your emotions and your hurt. Uh, but how are you going to get up and move forward? And how are you gonna teach the kids? Because kids are watching you. And that's what I've learned my first two years the most is like I can't keep being like this. Like, I think there's a good balance to show kids, like, yeah, it's all right to hurt because that means you care, but now you have to get back up and what are you going to do with it?

SPEAKER_02 51:45

ComMAC 24-hour rule, man. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Changed my whole entire life, man. From I mean, from sports, business, romance, faith. Like that, like you get 20. When something really good happens, you 24 hours celebrate. But now something really bad happens, you 24 hours deal with it.

SPEAKER_01 52:02

I'm down to like three months. I'm more bigger than 24. I'm gonna get through.

SPEAKER_04 52:10

Year one, I would say probably four months, year two after the cast, and three months. And then this was nice. Yeah, yeah. This year was good.

SPEAKER_01 52:19

But look, but but look, but look, it's bigger than football for us. Absolutely. That's why I don't care about the negativity and what everybody has to say. You'll never understand. And I don't expect you to. And God bless you. And I don't care if they do. No, and I don't care. I really don't. But but like this is more than football. Like you're protecting your work, your family, and you're teaching these kids how to build their armor for going into life that can be merciless. So, you know, like you understanding how that that that whole piece plays in and how much you put into something, I'm not just gonna give it up and be happy about it. I'm just not gonna cut fall short and be happy. That doesn't mean I'm gonna bounce back. But you know, I want people around me that care. You know, I also want people around me that can bounce back, right? And and you had to pick me up, and Ed's had to pick me up, and you had to be light with me seeing that, you know, you you know you're hurting, and it only feels like you're the only person in the world that that that it's hurting like that. But it's because we put so much into it. You know, we didn't we didn't just go on a bus tour for recruiting. That's the last thing I cared about. We all spent time away from our families. We spent time away from doing other things that may be more more uh attractive, you know, as far as just going on vacation or whatever it may be. We we went, we we said, hey, we are intentionally going to spend time to build our armor and care enough that when we go out and play for each other, we're playing for something bigger. And nobody will be able to understand because they didn't spend this kind of time. Go spend that time. You know, they don't want to do that.

SPEAKER_04 53:39

They'd rather people would rather sit on the outside and fire arrows at us or other successful schools, not just CC, but just fire arrows and say, Well, they're cheating, they're paying players, they're doing this, they're doing this. And it's like, no, you just don't want to put the work in that we're putting it emotionally and spiritually before anything else. And then everything, whatever sport it is, comes after that. That's what people don't understand. That's the secret sauce.

SPEAKER_01 54:01

Yeah. Well, and I feel sorry for them. You know, like at the end of the day, like we are we are blessed to experience this and have the people around, whether it's a coach Rods or Coach Magneys or Coach Greys or Father Words or Father Donner or Coach Mack, Coach Karate, all these people who maybe had different personalities and maybe some different methods, but they all operated under one understanding of a mission, goodness, discipline, and knowledge, and a work ethic and bonding through that work ethic and not being willing to surrender it with humility and respect. And that's awesome. And, you know, I I if anything, I talk kids away, you know, if they're in here for a shadow or they're coming to our camp and their parents are able to talk to us. I'm trying to talk them out of it because this place isn't for everybody, and everybody's not for this place. You know, I don't care what you do well. If you if you don't fit into understanding that you can come in here and put your own selfish motivations aside and agenda and build for something bigger, because that's what life's gonna take. You know, that this is more, you know, everything affects my family, everything affects my wife, my kid, everything affects my brothers and my friends. So everything that I do has to be bigger. If I'm just worried about me, then you're just gonna be a bull in a china shop and break all the glass, not care about the collateral damage, and you're gonna move on and life isn't gonna be real happy, you know? And I think that's what we're all trying to do is we're trying to be happy at the same time, stay true to your roots and understand what God wants you for your mission in life.

SPEAKER_04 55:22

You know, when you got married and had kids, did that change that intensity? Because I feel like for me, my first MHSAA meeting, the first thing out of Jack Roberts' mouth, who was the director at the time, the athletic director has to keep the calmest head in the building at all times. Yeah. First thing he said, and I'm like, I mean, I'm single at the time, and I'm thinking, oh, I might have a hard time with that one, which I still do sometimes. I get a little fired up. I got a 15-yarder year rookie season for not saying anything at all, did not say, didn't swear, didn't cuss, nothing, didn't yell at the official. He was upset about I haven't got a 15 yard in three years.

SPEAKER_01 55:56

I just want to put it on.

SPEAKER_04 55:56

I feel like you did.

SPEAKER_01 55:57

Somebody took one for you, so Cody Patton took one. I did not, I I have not had one yet. I think that official meant to throw that flag on you.

SPEAKER_04 56:05

I just was like, I'll take it. It's his first year, don't worry about it. But you you know, you talk about struggling through adversity, you talk about teaching the kids how to pick themselves back up. When you started coaching here at CC as our head coach, I remember sitting down with you at Leo's and I asked you, Justin, why do you think you're the head coach for Catholic Central? Why are you the man for this job? And you flat out told me, God called me to do this. God called me to be here. It's time, it's the right time in my life. I felt that everything went great through the process, things like that. But you came into that first year coaching, going through a whirlwind of health issues in your own family, some big losses in your own family. Meanwhile, you're trying to not necessarily rebuild our culture, but just put that final stamp on it to get us going in the right direction. Again, not like we weren't, but we needed to tweak a few things. But now you went through, like I said, a lot of loss, a lot of trials, a lot of tribulations, not only here, but I know there were things going on internationally as well that you were wearing as well with your family members and things like that. How did you find that balance? You go through that first season, it's baptism by fire. You catch a tough loss to North Hill. You're going through all this family stuff. How were you able to pick yourself back up?

SPEAKER_01 57:14

Well, I I you know, I gotta start with the the month before uh Dan Anderson resigned. Um, I was learning how to the first time in my life to surrender to God. But now I was literally going outside, taking my dog, Otis Blue Redding out uh for, you know, at midnight. Um I was staying up really late. I was really beating myself up. Uh, and I just felt like what I was doing with my life for 25 years was coming to a head. I I think your gift and your curse, uh, your passion for something becomes your gift and your curse. I think at every point you might end up hating what you love to do. And I just felt there was something else that God was calling me to do. And I would literally say, if it's me shoveling crap, I'll be the best crap shoveler, just tell me. And I was doing this, doing this for 30, uh, 30, 30 days. And then um, you know, I I got that that note uh that that coach was resigning, and I didn't think twice about putting my name in for it or nothing. I just the first thing that came to my mind was wow, Catholic Central football is probably going to change forever. And then um, it was you, Aaron, you know, and I can't thank you enough to like, you know, just coming up to reel me back in and just say, hey, I don't know if it's gonna work out, but but you should at least take a chance. Like, and I started like is you know, this is the thing about God, you start listening to God. Like, uh now I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to have all the answers for once in my life because I don't have them. And I'm sick of trying to find them, and God's just sitting there like, you're gonna learn, young man. You're gonna learn, young man, because this is gonna be way bigger than just your career. This is for your life, this is for the balance you need to find. So when when that circumstance came up, and then I'm going through the process, I started feeling closer and drawing closer to like, yeah, yeah, this this is this is what he's calling me. I never knew if I would coach again. I'd passed up some college opportunities. I was, you know, up to here in my career. Uh I was still growing, legacy's still growing. Yeah, stressed out, you know, just coming off a lot of uh lot of tragedies and just just heartache and in my personal life and my family. And and and God draw drew me back to the one thing that he knew would balance me out and make me a better man and father and husband, and also a place I think that needed me at the time to come back and use my career and my experiences that God blessed me with uh to pour into and to pay back. And so uh with all of that, you know, going through that first year was extremely intense because I'm like, oh, here we go again. I have no balance. Here we go again, I'm gonna, I'm gonna run the tread off the tires. And but now you because I knew and and maybe I didn't know, but something in me spiritually was like, you have to make sure you pray more. You have to make sure that faith is at the forefront. And the more that I did that inside the program, the more balance I was finding, the better my staff was as acclimating to our culture, even the guys that didn't go here, and the the better our team was growing in their bond. Now, did where we did we find the success that you oh well then that leads to immediate success? Well, what is success to you? But now you know success rings and trophies, or is it positive impact on others? Is it positive impact on lives? Is it giving these young men the real fruit uh uh to grow and to build their armor, to become great leaders in society and in their families? And that's what it is, you know. And yes, we do want to win. I don't want to compete, I want to dominate. Yes, I do, but it's not the end all. It's just not. And it's hard to say that when I mourn over something for three months, but the reality of it is that's not what drives me every day. These kids do, you know, you guys do, right? Like, you know, making sure this place lives for another hundred years because of what it does for people's lives. You know, it's not easy.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:54

It it you know, we talk a lot about failing forward here and and tinkering with certain programs here. It's tough because I don't get to coach a program and I don't want to coach. I mean, I miss coaching a ton. That's I coached the Wild Lake Braves, that gives me my little coaching fix, but not coaching here is tough for me, but it allows me to love up our coaches, to pick our athletes up and tell them after a tough loss. Guys, the journey doesn't always end with us raising a state championship banner. There's plenty of journeys I've had here that have been better than a state championship team because the kids just wanted it more. They cared about each other more. The more we can make our kids care about each other here, the better off we're gonna be on every single front. That's why every single sport, every single activity is successful. There's no difference between athletics and activities. Yeah. The same amount of work. I know how hard the academic team works, I know how hard robotic works. I see them here seven days a week in that robotics lab. Yeah, I know they're putting the time in. But now I feel like, and people think we started that saying iron sharpens iron. I'm like, guys, that came from the book of Proverbs. I stole that from the Bible. Yeah, but it really is. This is a place where iron sharpens iron. If you're an athletic team and you have a state championship assembly, you know damn well that academic team wants to do the same thing with a natty title or somebody else or DECO or something, eSports, whatever it might be. That's why this is a place for every kid. I also feel like it can be a place for every type of servant leader. If you come to Catholic Central and you don't really want to pour into the people, you don't want to pour into the kids, you think that just coaching here is a title, you're not gonna last. You mentioned guys like Tom Mack, 41 years. Yeah. Coach Rod, 40 plus years, Coach Magney's on year 52. You look at some of our other longer-tenured coaches, Dave Wilson, Brandon Kalineki. Like when you come to coach here, we don't we want it to feel like the mafia.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:40

I don't want you to leave. And if you if you're out, I'm gonna find a way to pull you back in. Same thing with you.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:45

Blood in, blood out, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:46

That's it. Yeah, yeah. No doubt. Maybe not that quite intense, but but it really, it really to us, to us.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:51

I know it feels like that. Let me cut that.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:55

It's live and die for CC High. It's true. You know, what does that mean? Live and die for your purpose, live and die for your people. I would do anything for this squad, do anything for my family. All bets are off.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:04

You know, people hear that that saying too, live and die. Well, we don't want our kids dying for innocent. Like, guys, we're not saying literally die for Catholicism. But you live and die for Christ. Exactly. It's the same thing. We're just in this place, this building, the people, it's just an extension of that.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:17

Yeah, yeah. No, the the the it's all representative of it. And it's gonna get harder in the world in the day and age that we are to represent the things that you truly believe in and know that's right. It's gonna be more challenged than ever. And are we building young shamrocks to go out with an armor bill to do that, to stand up? What what what is right, who who they worship, why, why, why their life and their opportunities were given to them, and then instill that into their family, you know?

SPEAKER_04 1:03:41

How much is coaching here as a head coach? And I know you were an assistant for years, so uh head coach on JD as well, but being in charge of this program and these young men, how has it affected you as a father? Uh tremendously. I I I love the on a side note, I love the relationships that you're and I also love that you're who you are and you have three daughters as well. I love it, just secretly. I do love it. Yeah, it does give my two boys options though. Yeah. If you try to, I hear you're marrying them off to other people and stuff like that. All right, that's fine. So I'm on the list. Yeah, yeah. We're good. But how much has that helped you become a father? Has it helped change you?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:16

Yeah, I I I mean, number one, having girls, um, and then the the the far end of the spectrum of coaching at all boys' school and the testosterone you come home to to the estrogen, right? But um, yeah, it it has because your response, you know, you have to be able to control your emotions. You cannot bring your work home with you. And also, like, I have a responsibility when I practice what I preach. So, you know, do comes over for Thanksgiving. Uh, the jam, you know, all these guys have been in them out of my house. We we sit together at church, we eat when they come home. They might come over and swim, whatever the case may be. Mandatory pictures with your daughters after every day. Yeah, my daughters love this place. This is home. Like that was the thing that melted my heart the most. We were driving here one day, and I knew like they were here a lot. And they're like, Dad, no, we love this. This is like our second home. And that that that that attributes to the people, right? Like they feel that it's not the facilities, it's the people. And it's they feel connected and they're willing to sacrifice their father and their husband for the good of the overall bigger mission that is not just about winning football games, but it's about what you're pouring into those boys. And they feel how good these young men are starting to become men. They feel that they watch the transition now every year. The hardest part about coaching with now sending these boys off into the next phase of their life. I was not prepared for saying goodbye and the emptiness feeling of the season being over, whether we won or lost, or watching these kids enroll early, or watching them graduate. I I I still do not do very well with it. I'm terrible at graduation. Yeah, terrible at gradually. Yeah, and you are you are watching them enter another phase, but you're still back where I think you were a significant piece as far as the school and and people in it. Um, but but Yeah, it's it's made me a better man. I I I could not imagine my life here without Catholic Century. Me being in this program and being around the people that I am every day. And the like I said, I told the kids on the bus, I said, look, as much as you guys think I do for you, or our staff does, or you know, Mr. Choir, Mr. Babbitt's, you you, you, you do just as much for us, if not more. More. You know, because you inspire me every day to be great in my life so I don't come here and I'm not a liar.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:28

But now you have to Well, it does help too. You know, you watch those guys graduate and you let them go out of your program. And I think the nice thing for us is with an incoming group of freshmen, we get to start that whole thing all over again. So it keeps us younger as well. Because I don't, I mean, I turned 50 in September. Like, I don't, I don't feel like I'm sometimes when I move a little bit, yes, I feel like I'm 90. Yeah. But like mentally being around being around these kids, though, the kids keep you sharp, they keep you on your P's and Q's. I don't like learning all the new stupid slang words that these idiots have because they got a zillion of them. But then I bring those home to my 10 and 7-year-old and they think I'm like the coolest dad. Dad, how do you know what that means?

SPEAKER_01 1:07:01

I'm like, but now they they ask me something on the you know, these kids, man, that you know, I always say sometimes kids can be dumb, but they're not stupid, you know. Uh, and they say, Coach, you know, like uh you're gonna stay around for a long time. Like, when do you think you would ever retire? And I said, I I'm gonna retire when I stand up in front of a group of young men and I don't think I'm reaching them. And I don't feel not listening with their eyes and their ears, and I don't feel the mutual love and energy. And if I'm not able to deliver that, then I am not worthy to be in this position here at Catholic Central or running this football group. Oh man, you really thought about this. It's a part of your life. I'm like, I'm like, no, like what why why should I do it injustice? If I can't impact you, if I can't reach you, then I should stop talking to you. I should stop leading you, you know, and I should take another role or just step away. And that that'll be the time, right? Like, and hopefully it's no time soon. And I don't like it will be anytime soon. Bet your ass it ain't happening anytime soon. Well, I hope I'll, you know, it's less about I don't, I'm not looking for, I don't need any other opportunity. I I'm right, I'm right where my feet are, as Coach Hancock already said, but it's about the mojo. You know, do you have the charisma and the presence to keep keep connected? And do you have the want? Because that is a that you need to coach yourself up on what it takes to continue to adjust and evolve with the young men.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:16

Go, yeah, no, no, no. You like you have to put in that that that almost like that like that social worker type of mentality where you're going out and being very, very intentional on the best practices of connecting and engaging. And they change.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:29

Yes. You gotta you gotta pour back into yourself. Justin, I'm telling you, I'm dead serious when I say this. And I and it's not saying that you're egotistical or anything like that, but I think you love this version of yourself right now, where you are with your feet planted, more than you have before. Yeah, that's why I think you're able to pour more love back into the kids, back into your own kids, back into Tina, back into your kids. Because it's not about me. Exactly. Yeah, I think you finally, like you said, you finally realize that this isn't my plan. Like I can figure it out, but it's already planned out for me. Yeah. Let me just try to be as positive as I can and affect as many people as possible. We always say it, you can't love other people until you love yourself. Not like you were bad at loving other people, but I've I've seen a major change in you. I've seen the same change in Coach Torrey, yeah, who got baptized a year or two ago, completely changed him as a person because he knows it's not his story. It's a story that's already been written for him. So, you know, when you talk about family, what does the Catholic Central family mean to you in your soul?

SPEAKER_01 1:09:27

But now you mean it means a bridge, bridge to your spirituality. It means a bridge to Jesus Christ, it means a bridge to heaven, you know, it means uh uh uh uh a stability that you need that we are responsible to bring to this world and our communities uh that that is is deteriorating every single day. So the CC family is about loyalty, it's about goodness, discipline, and knowledge. It's about a bond that nobody can understand and that we we did work for and that we did earn. And that's why this place is so special. And uh, so you know, I I I that this is this, you know, when you call this place a school or you call it an athletic program, it's such a disservice to what it actually is. You know, it's a mission.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:07

It's a family, it's a it's a family mission, is really what it is. It's a family mission. Like top to bottom. Yeah. That's the thing. For me, when I came back to Catholic Central, I actually loved it more when I came back as a graduate and as a young coach because I realized what it meant to me, the framework it gave to me, what it provided to me as a young college graduate who's out in the world in his first job, and being able to still come here and get that piece of inner spirituality or that leadership, that motivation from Coach Mack. We've had a lot of great mentors in all of our lives, Sean included. I would say that for the three of us, Coach Mack has always been a major mentor. For you, I know how tight you are with him. Yeah, what is it like to carry on the tradition that he really did build? We had some great coaches before Coach Mack, but he put his stamp on it his first season here and kept it all the way through, even the Dan Anderson regime. But to follow a hero of yours and Coach Mack, what's that been like in terms of the program?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:58

Uh, you know, it's unreal. It's surreal. Um Did you ever think you'd be doing it? No, I mean, I mean, I mean, not only did I never think I would make it through Catholic Central, then to a point that you had the respect and reputation to be in a position to do that, but it just seemed so far-fetched. But the the the two biggest compliments I've ever received from a coach was from Coach Mac, and and the number one one was that I was one of the hardest workers he's ever had that played for him. And not not the best, not the best athlete, not the fastest, not the strongest, one of the hardest workers. And and you know, he tells me all the time now there there's nobody that was built to do what you're doing right now, and it's perfect for the times. And like his his, you know, and all in him just even jumping on a video to talk about the magicism, believing and capturing him speaking in front of our team, uh, even though he hasn't spoken in front of a team in a long time. For him to be willing to do that, you know he believes in that. And he knows that we're adapting our tools and our weaponry to make sure that we adjust, to make sure we fight our battle and we build the uh what we need to build in order for these kids to be successful. So it's awesome that yes, he is old school and yes, he didn't have a cell phone until you know maybe five years ago. But he understands what it takes and and he he he's uh he's supportive of it and he he's like, man, that this is hard. And I see what you know the staff is doing, I see what his boys are doing, you know, see what what I'm doing all together uh to to to progress, but but even though we've changed, we really haven't. It's just we're moving with the times.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:30

That's the thing with him too. And he it it's great to see him come back to games and just get this kind of sort of be a fan, but then you talk to him after and he's like, uh, I love when we ran this player, this player, and this one was great. And it's like, Coach, you do realize you could still coach, you might not be good with all the techie stuff now. Like, yeah, Bob Santello didn't even know it was computer turned out. Yeah, came in my office my first day, he's like, Oh, that turns on. It's very similar to Coach Mac who had Nancy and Rosemary Bales read their emails and answer them like hand-raised, it was crazy. But the thing I think that I love the most is that very similar to Coach Mac. I always knew that Coach Mac loved us. I always knew that he wanted the best for us. I always knew that he believed in us as who we were people and and ch children of God. Yeah. Like a Tom Mack who were seminarians, Bob Santello, seminarian, Tony Magney. Seminarios too, all of them. Think about that. You're talking about three legends here who, even though they didn't end up becoming bazillions or priests, they led a very priestly life in terms of how they raised their families, how they raised each other and how they raised us. I think that's why we're so lucky to have been around the real OGs when it comes to when it comes to culture. Even and I gotta give Coach Fracassa, you know who we lost recently, uh, I gotta give him the same love because he and Coach Mack were so similar, they developed a friendship because of how competitive they were, how faith-based they were, and how much they loved the kids. Yeah, they respected each other and how. Exactly. And Coach Frassa culture-wise, when you talk to a guy like Dave Soffron, who's over here with us now and is a shamrock, he talks about Coach Fracassa the same way that we all talk about Coach Mack. So I really think our two community, two communities were very lucky to have those two guys going head to head on a yearly basis and that rival rivalry to be built in to what it is. I know you and Coach Marshall are working back to getting that rivalry to where it needs to be. And not that it hasn't been competitive, but we're on a bit of a streak, and I know we don't want that streak to end, but it's good for a good CC Rice football game is good for the soul. Yeah, no doubt about it. No doubt about that.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:27

I I I think at the end of the day, they they taught us, you know, these men you just uh you know mentioned taught us how to be a man's man, uh, but that you still can cry, you still can yell, you still can have emotion, you still can uh be connected and have empathy and still be a man of Christ and still be a tough, you know, and and tough because of your discipline and your consistency and your actions to help others. And uh that's what that's what I've learned from this school over my time, uh, is how to be the right tough. You know, um I will always stand up for what I believe in. Uh I I you know try to have the emotional intelligence and still be professional and uh lead by example. And sometimes you you you have to pick your battles. Um, but I'm always going to protect this place, my family, and my brothers, you know, to the end of the day. When I came back.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:13

Before we get to our last little tidbit of positivity, I gotta ask you about Tina.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:19

When I came back. I know we talked about being blessed with Saints for Wives. That's a tough woman you got at home. Yeah. Great mom, tough as nails, tough turk. Gone through, yes, gone through her own challenges while you've been starting this you know resurgence in your coaching career as our head football coach. Tell me a little bit more about her support, her relationship, and what she means to you as not only a wife and the mother of your children, but yeah, the head coach's wife. Because I know it's not easy sitting up in the stands, yeah, listening to some of the comments. Yeah, no, you're making me cry, man. Um that's a whole point I asked it.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:48

Yeah, yeah. No, I I um you know, I I tell my players right now, stay away from the dream killers. You know, and I that's gotten me a little trouble at home. Yeah, I get some flack from that. But the reality of it is when you find the right woman, she's going to be your backbone. And uh, there is no great man without even a greater woman. And uh, you know, we we we obviously, you know, uh the Mary Alma Mater and the Virgin Mary and the mother being a single mother household and uh the woman, uh, if she's supportive, she has met values, and she raises your kids in your home, uh, you're able to accomplish anything you set out in this life. And without her, um, she, you know, I don't know where I'm at. You know, she was from a traditional family, a very traditional, cultural family. Uh, you know, she has three citizenships, speaks Arabic, you know, very, very different from what I grew up for and brought something to my life and my household and my kids uh that I can't thank her enough for. You know, um, she has literally sacrificed me to the greater good of what we believe our lives were called upon. And if anybody gets a ring or a trophy or accolades, it should be her way before me. It should be my mother. I should be my grandmother, God rest her soul. Her name's going up on the courtyard today. They they had the signage come in, which is one of the most proudest things to to have my grandmother and the legacy she left and instilled and just the heartache she had to work through and and the foundation she had a create for us.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:13

You feel like that started with her, trickled down to dawn, then to Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:16

You know, my my wife, man, you know, a little more passive, even though her mother was was tough. You know, she was the first one I called the Turkish tank. Now it's my daughter, Sunny. Uh, you know, her mother, God rest her soul. But uh yeah, you know, I have tough women around me, man. They're they're they they're they're sharks when it came to her being around my aunts and my mother and my grandmother, you know, she she she learned a whole different angle of toughness, and her mom was tough. So yeah, I don't worry. I I don't so much worry about my girls, I worry about the boys that day.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:45

Yes, because I can tell you this Tina, she might seem quiet, a little passive. You can feel that Turkish intensity when she's around.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:52

Yeah, trust me. Yeah, she's got it. Yeah. So uh no, but she she she's been a uh, you know, look, she's I've been in 11 states in three months. Um, all of it for for Catholic Central, Catholic Central football, alumni development, and she's the biggest supporter. She never makes me feel bad. She, you know, I know she has hard days when I'm FaceTiming the kids. I mean, that's that's gone a lot. And she she's down for the mission. You know, we we call it the ride or die, man. That's that's my that's my wife, you know. So I think, you know, my friends that are younger and or the the young men that come over my house, they see our relationship, and although it's not perfect like any marriage isn't, uh they see how we interact and how we support each other, and I think they look up to that. And that that's a testament to her. One of the best compliments I've ever gotten came from him.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:39

And it was early when we had Brooks and Bo and Chris was around. He was just, he was, I think you might have been you might have been with the Chargers at this point, I think, when Brooks he was playing with the Chargers too.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:47

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:48

Chris was like, he's like, I don't know how you do it. He's like, it's it's so motivational to see how you and Lauren balance the things that you balance with your kids running all over the place. If we didn't have FaceTime, I don't know how we would do it. Because that's I mean he came back, no doubt. That's the one way you can at least see your kids and like tuck them in when you're not gonna be home and stuff. Chris, I think, and and correct me if I'm wrong, but I think the strongest female in your life is your mom.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:12

Oh, of course.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:12

So I want you to touch on that relationship and that support that you get from her before I touch on my own mother, since we're celebrating the ladies real quick.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:20

No, I think my mother is one of the best examples of humility. My mother showed me that it's okay to not know. And the first step and actually gaining information is realizing, like, hey, I don't know. And so I believe my mother is what made me so culture because I remember, you know, now that I'm an adult and being around you guys, I'm you heard that right, allegedly.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:42

I had to throw in allegedly as the first one.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:43

Go to have an adult, like I know it would be a lot to just sit in front of someone that you know looks up to you, references you, thinks you're perfect, and go, like, I don't have much of I don't have it figured all out. But what I will do is I'm gonna see you somewhere where I feel as though they do have it figured out because I want you to learn. And and you learning, you growing as a young man is more important than my ego. And I believe that's why it's always been so easy for me to sit back and listen to others when I can't believe that people genuinely want what's best for you. Um, and you know, I learned that skill from my mother and not being afraid to go and knock on doors and see who's open and you know, furthering your research and figuring out, okay, these are the best practices, this is what doesn't work, and this is what does work, and then you know, studying, you know, first principle thinking and debunking whatever nonsense you have in your head and actually going out and seeking and finding the truth. Those are skills that I learned from my mother, and and that has always kept our relationship, you know, so so tight. You know, we've been through we've been through a lot. You know, we we we've we've been through a lot. And I think, you know, one of our one of our biggest blessings in our life till this day, you know, mother always says the best decision that she's ever made was sending me here because the uh my ability now to not just impact here or impact society, but to but to impact my impact my family. You know, I I became a much better man in the community. I don't know if if I still am a person that decides to, you know, be more of an intellectual or be a speaker or a writer or an author if I don't if I don't go to CC, you know, you know, you can go play football anywhere. I always tell you, man, that you can go, you can go and play football, go to college, go pro. You can literally do that. But then what? But then what? You know, and and and having a genuine interest in those things. And so, you know, my mother sending me here and having the humility to send me to a place where when I came back, she didn't know what to expect, but she just looked at the data. You know, she went on the website, okay. We see National Merit Scholars, okay, good. We see these state championships, okay. Support that's good. Okay, we see like support, okay. Boom, boom, boom. Now we don't see much diversity, but whatever. And her having that humility, you're like, you know what? These are the best practices, and we're gonna follow the best practices. And um, having a conversation with you and Father Huber, and you know, that my ability to be almost kind of like like like punched in the mouth and to delay gratification. I I learned that from my mother because it truly does get greater later. If you have the humility to accept the year, two years, five, whatever, of being looked down at, you know, and then but during that, but during that process, you're building that proof. And always say it's about proof over validation. You need to have an undeniable stack of proof that you can look back and say, I am who I say I am, and I do what I say I can do. Validation doesn't matter anymore. No, not at all. You didn't put the work in there, yeah. Exactly. That's why I say like it's at the end of the day, like, do you know? All right, I woke up, I woke up seven days a week, I did my prayers, I worked out, I poured to people, whatever, whatever I did, what I said I was gonna do. You have to prove that to yourself, you know, and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. So I got that from my mother because people people gave her, you know, being from the city, people gave her a hard time, but those same people are now making sure that making sure that their grandkids come in. Yeah. Or even other family members of yours, too. Yeah, or even other family members, like you know, and so I mean, and even in the culture, I mean, we we all know this this school is a melting pot now. Yeah, and so that happens when you know sometimes you got to be that flag bearer, you know, for the 20th century.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:06

This is the best version of Catholic Central we've been in. By far. I feel like in terms in terms of not just in terms of the way the school looks, that's hands down. This is the most diverse this place has ever been. You talk about religiously all the way down to you know people's ethnicity and where they come from. Socioeconomically, but that's but people think diversity is just, well, how many black kids do you have in the school? That's part of the goal, yes. But like you said, socioeconomic. We want this place to be affordable to every type of family. We're not giving you an athletic scholarship, it's all need-based. But if you want to come here and you want to work hard, you will be better because of it, and your family will be better because of it. My mom has always told me, you know, shout out to my mom. I was just with her yesterday, and with Mother's Day coming up, I feel like it's important. We talked about our moms. She always told me, God has a plan for you. That's all she would say. Aaron, I know God has something special planned for you. And it took me a while to figure out what it was. When I came up with it, I wasn't coaching here, but when I came back in the building as the admissions director, I knew this was where I was supposed to be. And for me, it's just I can't pour enough love into our people, our kids, and this place to pay back what it's given me on a daily basis. Every day I come here, like you said. If you if there's a time where you get up in front of the kids and they're not feeling you, then you know it's time to quit coaching. I told Lauren the other day and my mom, I said, if there's a time where I go to a game and I'm not fired up and I'm not uh I'm not excited, then well, hats off to you, man.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:26

You've been a great gatekeeper. And uh you show by example to the coaches and people in here that you can have an open door policy, that it's necessary, uh, and and don't forget about the the the main thing. And the main thing is is the kids. That's it. You know, and then whatever you have to do, you have to drive, you know, stop doing your work, stop a call, stop anything for a kid that's knocking on your door, or for them to feel comfortable that that is really an open door, not just saying it is is is the most important part of what Catholic Central is today. And I think it's the most needed thing in society for for young people.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:02

There isn't a single day you can go through here and work from eight in the morning until 3 30. Yeah. Uninterrupted. No, no. And I don't think any of us want to. You're not doing a good job if you are.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:10

No, not at all. Like, I don't want it's one thing with adults. It's a I think it's another you still have to build relationships, but you know, like but they the kids when they're coming to knock on your door, that still might not be an easy thing for them, even though you think you're comfortable. And they, you know, you have to sometimes pull out why they're stopping by in the first place. And it might be asking a simple question, but there's something deeper going on. And if you lose the passion to know that, then you shouldn't be in this position, not here at this school.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:36

I think it's as easy as asking a kid, what weight are you carrying? Yeah, I can tell you're carrying something. I asked a kid when I came of the year this year, broke down. I mean, hyperventilating crying in my office, told me all the stuff he was carrying, and I was like, that's not stuff on your plate, those are all side dishes. The only thing on your plate is your family, your faith, and your health. Yeah, everything else you can figure out what you need to take with you. Because when I mean these kids carry around so much, we still do. I mean, there's things like I think that all of us, including Sean, are very in tune with being able to like see somebody walking down the hallway and just know they're in the middle of something. Like, you good? Like everything all right, but I think we do a good job at seeing people. The one thing we always do to end the House of Hammers podcast, and we could probably sit in here for four hours, but I know today is a little bit special for the football program after school, yes? Yeah, you want to share that?

SPEAKER_01 1:26:24

Oh, again, a little bit of the fruit. My ring blessing, and I'm putting it right on the shelf. Uh, I'm sure as the juniors are, but it's just the the uh you know, it's the final cherry on top, it's the final kind of closure of of last season, is getting our our state championship ring. So uh, you know, everybody always asks what's your favorite ring, because this is the fifth one I've been blessed with, and it it's the next one. So um before we go to that though, I want to say one last thing. Um very relevant. It's much easier for Satan to distract you from heaven than to lead you to hell. When I came back, and I think as uh this world continues to be mass communication technology, uh kids have to measure themselves each and every day. It is our responsibility to continue to lead them to the path of heaven uh and distract them from the things that are going to pull them down. Um and a lot of that is the weights that they're carrying and and how important it is to have mentors or people uh that are just willing to listen. You know, I think you said that earlier, doing a better job of just not always having the answer.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:24

Listening intently is the probably and I know not to make you guys feel old, but a big part of the thing. But you do it all the time, anyway. Why would you why you tell you? I don't need any help. Yeah. No, it's because like you know, I I think like like for me, it's like one of those, like it's like I have like an epiphany because you know what being able to be what you guys were to me when I was young, you know, it it's just kind of like God's gift to you is what you do with your life and your gift of God. I mean, God's gift to you is life and your gift of God is what you do with your life. Being able to kind of like see what made you guys, I always wonder like what makes you guys do that? Like, like why would you want to talk to this? Like, especially when I wasn't good, yeah. It was like, Then you see just like how much when you see a young man that needs help, that's uh afraid to ask, feels like he doesn't fit in, and you make him feel like no, you're more than welcome to hear. No, this is this is your place, just as how you look, what you have, what you think. You're no no no, this is what once you sign the dialogue line, this is just as much your place as it is a Mike Martin. This is just as much your place as it is as much. Take him home. It's home, man. And so, like, though it that's one of those like mad epiphanies when it's like and then the home is what you make it, exactly. Right? So that's all it is. I appreciate you guys. I remember, I mean, I thought I thought you guys are the cool. I mean, not that I don't think it's still, but we're still cool. I remember don't get it twisted. We're still thinking I remember like thinking you guys are the coolest people in the world at like 40, 15, like go to San Ped's, like, oh, I'm gonna call up muscle milk and he's giving me hats and he's like walking around with his short with his little short people talking about my shirt. He had his head his shorts on.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:04

We're not gonna we don't have enough time to get into comparing outfits. You took it to a different level. At some point, I'm gonna bring pictures on here that Sean can flash in. Could you drop some into this portion of the podcast? Like if I just sent them to me. Oh, I got a good one.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:18

The 80s heart, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:20

Larry Johnson uh I don't mean to make you guys feel old, but I do every single time we're in this room with some type of sly comment. Oh, yeah, of course. It's like me constantly celebrating that you're not married yet. You got time. See, but it's God's plan.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:34

But when you when you when you watch the podcast clips, it's always just me giving a given reverence. Oh, I appreciate you really. It doesn't sound like, oh shot.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:42

How old are you? 38. Yeah, you're straight. Yeah, I waited until I was 30. Me too, 33. Took us a little while to grow up. 33. 37.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:50

I thought you're married.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:51

38.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:52

We already're 40s, man. Oh, I wasn't. I started having kids late. You know, I got young young kids, man. Yeah, my buddies, you know. We suffer the same curse. They keep you right. That's why we suffer the same haircut.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:05

I mean, I'm just following my example. Slow down over there. Take it easy.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:16

We've ever won up the Shamrocks After Dark podcast. Allegedly, I'm not available for that one, by the way. I'm not hosting that, I'm not hosting that one either. The one thing we like to do to tie the whole thing together and put a little bow on it is give however many people end up watching this, listening to it. And we got a good little pocket of people who like to tap into this and and just hear some positivity. But what can you give the people as a positive takeaway to get them through something that they're challenging, going through that's challenging or a tough time in life?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:47

Um, you know, be be grounded in in your faith. You know, uh stop trying to figure everything out by yourself. Um understand that there is a bigger purpose for you. I think we've talked about it plenty. And uh know your truth. You know, what you do in the dark comes to the light. Uh continue to strive, take one day at a time. I think that we have such a hard time doing that in society as human beings, and and have some grace with yourself. And you you talk about this all the time, Aaron. You know, having grace, give yourself grace, uh, learn from your mistakes, but move forward, move forward with somebody. You cannot carry, you cannot carry your shield and your sword by yourself. You you you must have your faith. And and and mine is my savior and Jesus Christ. Uh, continue to do that. And and uh, you know, always look at, I think my last thing is always look at success as the positive impact on others. I think if you do that and live for others, uh your family, your friends, your impact in this world, uh God is going to put you on the path no matter how many times that you veer off.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:48

What do you got for us, big fella? Honestly, just keep it simple. It gets greater later. You know, delay gratification. I always tell people in order to be if you want to be exceptional, you must be the exception. You know, people are gonna make fun of how you dress, how you do things, how you prepare, how you pray, the type of intensity you put into something. Why are you not average? You know, embrace not being average, embrace not being normal because what is normal, right? What is you know, what is people like, oh let's normalize this, let's normalize that. No, just do it. You know, like always tell our young men if it's not going against you know the word of God, if it's not going against your family, you go ahead and try it. You know, shoot for the moon, you know, put your all into something because one of the greatest fears people have is that feeling of regret, you know, and and right now it's such an amazing opportunity to go out and just chase your dreams. When I came back, just understand that things come sometimes after a long time horizon. I know AI as someone that's even in that in that space, it makes you think that things come quickly. And no, no, no. You may be able to see an idea quickly, but the execution takes time. When I came back, I want to make sure people just keep that, keep that in their mind.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:56

I love that it gets greater later because not everything happens right away and it takes a ton of work. I think for me the biggest thing is to know your value. To know your value. Don't let anybody else determine what your value is. The outside opinions don't matter. Sometimes the opinions of your friends don't matter. You build your own value on following the word of God and following who you are trying to become as a man, as a woman, a husband, a father, a daughter, a son, it doesn't matter. You create your own value by how much you pour back into other people. I love myself. I love this version of myself. I love Justin. I love Chris. I love Sean. I constantly say that to the people that I care about because I know that I care about myself enough to pour as much as I possibly can into the people that I care about. And sometimes I'll continue to pour even if those people don't care. So my challenge to everybody out there, along with what Coach Cassante said and Mr. Okoye said, know your value. You create your own worth by what you pour in to other people.

SPEAKER_02 1:33:54

And when all else fails, when I came back, shoot over to CalixHentry.net and donate it to the 1928 clubs. You got a good little segue with that. I just thought I like that. Delay gratification every aspect of life, except when it comes to giving donation for the 1928 club.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:12

Sean will splice both of them together. We could always use more. But on behalf of myself, uh Sean Sova, who's always phenomenal behind the boards and makes this whole ring, whole thing run and does all the editing and everything, and Chris Okoy, who's been a part of this since the beginning, we can't thank you enough. Thanks for having me. For Chris to be a former player of yours, for me to have seen you grow up, watch you play, become a friend of yours, a brother of yours. The little brother you never wanted. Somebody that's in the trenches. No, I want anybody that's part of my circle, I want in that circle because they make me a better man. And you have helped make me a better person. I don't know if you realize that. You helped me stay strong in my face. I appreciate the way that you hustle for the kids. One one thing Coach Mac always said about you, even when you were at Grand Valley after Grand Valley, Justin is one of the biggest hustlers I know. You've always put people first before yourself. I think you're doing a better job of putting yourself a little bit first and giving yourself more grace, which is why you're continuing to grow. And I can't tell you how happy I am that we get to work together on a daily basis. I don't care about the wins, I don't care about the losses, I care about the faith, the love, and the brotherhood. And you've hit those three tick marks for me. And I can't wait to see where this goes for the next 50 years as you as our head coach. Hey, if it's 50, it's 50. I'll be here.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:31

If God'll have me, I'll I'll be I'll be here hopefully until the the end of times. But uh I appreciate the opportunity. And I'm not here without you having belief and faith in a uh a man that did not have any head coaching experience. So here we are. So I appreciate you, bro.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:45

I also knew that you were one of the biggest fire breathers that I've met, and that is a little bit of what we needed as well. So on behalf of the Shamrock Nation, the House of Hammers, anybody out there that might tap in for a little bit of posity, if you're struggling, find a piece of this podcast to take with you to help pick yourself back up. If you're flourishing, remember that doesn't last forever either, and you got to continue to put the work in. And when all else fails, keep hammering. We appreciate and love you guys.