Better Together - Peti Szabad

Sunday sermon recorded on June 7, 2026   

Part of the "Better Together" series.   

Slides used in the sermon: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qCLdLkOouWSI1yE9PKVOp-lJQfSjha6L/view?usp=drive_link 

https://linktr.ee/northpointema

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Well, today we're starting a new series uh and a new season over the summer. And our theme for the summer is better together.

unknown 0:09

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 0:09

Alright, so because I believe it is better together. And uh one of the things that uh that we're uh gonna do is we're gonna do a lot of fun activities as a church. Uh and you're invited to all of them. You probably won't be able to make all of them, but whatever you can make, we'll be so happy that we're doing it together, exactly. So one of them will be uh this is uh we did a hike last year, uh, and that was awesome. We all made it up to the summit of Mount Wachuset. Uh so we're gonna do that again on a different trail, uh, probably not as strenuous as the one last year, uh a little easier uh this coming Saturday. Actually, I I I went up Mount Wachuset on yesterday just you know uh just to keep keep myself in shape and I still remember where everything is. And uh and on the way down, I met a group of uh disciples from uh the metro region, about 10 20 young professionals with Marcelo Torres, and uh as many of you know from Worcester. They were coming up, and Marcelo says, Patty! So uh as they were they were out there for a hike, and that was that was that was encouraging. So the details uh we're meeting at 9 45 and start a hike at 10. But that you know, but get there at 9.45 so we can start a nike at 10. Uh the Echo Lake Trail is a is the southern part of Mount Watchuset uh on Westminster Road in Princeton, uh not on Princeton Road in Westminster. Just to you know there you sometimes you can make those switches. We're gonna take our time. So yesterday I went up and down, it was less than two hours, but we're gonna take our time and take three hours to do it. So that's that gives you an idea of we're not rushing, uh, but take you know, enjoying it. It's it's just a little, I think a little under or a little over three miles. So bring water, snacks, good footwear. If if there's a thing of maybe a scary of rain, then bring a rain jacket. Anyways, it's it's gonna be fun. You're not gonna get lost. You know, we're gonna we're gonna hike together. And and and I'll make sure that you don't get lost. You know, so so you can you can uh you can you can count on me for that, all right? So but let's get on with the sermon. So Saturday morning, meet you guys there. Better Together. And uh the title of today's sermon is actually Better Together. I got three points. Uh and uh hopefully these three points will you know uh encourage you. They're they're fairly short to the point. Uh we'll we'll have another 12 messages on this topic over the summer. So I I I realize I don't need to you know share every thought that I have just today. So we're gonna start with the idea of better together than alone. Uh I shared it uh this year I'm reading through the Bible in a year. Uh and uh I'm actually reading a chronological version of the Bible. So I've just read the story of Solomon, and I've read the book of Proverbs, and just finished reading the book of Ecclesiastes. And Ecclesiastes is some of this somewhat uh jaded wisdom about trying to make life work, ignoring God. Right? You know, have you and I done that before? Trying to find happiness and joy and pleasures. So I mean, can you imagine being the wisest man ever alive and trying it and still failing at it miserably? The frustration throughout the book of Ecclesiastes is so overwhelming. Solomon says, meaningless, meaningless, right, bother. That's his conclusion. Well, the real conclusion is to honor God with your life, and he gets to that in chapter 12. I'm not sure if he turned his life around at the end of his life, but he was definitely for a long time pursuing happiness without God. One of his observations in Ecclesiastes chapter 4, verse 8 through 10 is a very familiar passage to many of us. He says, There was a man all alone. He had neither son nor brother. There was no end to his store, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth. Alright, but there's your, you know, don't chase wealth. That's, you know, as much as you do it, it's not gonna be content. For whom am I toiling? He asked. And why am I depriving myself of enjoyment? This two is meaningless. A miserable business. Can't you just hear Solomon go in? Ah, come on. Then he kind of concludes, two are better than one. Because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm, but no one can keep warm alone. But how can one keep warm alone? The one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. So Solomon, in his wisdom, even trying to ignore God, recognizes that there's a blessing in not going at this life alone. Now I want to be, you know, respectful and sensitive. Some of the aloneness of life is just life. I know some of you are, you know, uh are single, and even though you wanted companionship for life, it did life doesn't necessarily turn it out that way. Uh but let me let me share a few observations about this passage after reading it in context of the entire book of Ecclesiastes. This passage is not about marriage. I'm sorry. And I apologize every time when we use this passage about marriage. It can be applied to marriage by finding a partner for life, a companion. But the passage isn't about marriage. Solomon actually shares in the book, he shares his frustration with marriage not making you happy either. Without God, marriage is not very satisfying. There's some aspects of it that can be good, but this is not about marriage. This is about companionship. Even the text, it doesn't talk about, you know, better, you know, if you fall down, your your spouse can help you up. It says your friend. It actually talks about a friend. It talks about any relationship where we care for one another. That's what it's talking about. Life is not meant to be lived alone. There, uh you know, and that's what he's he's he's explaining, he's looking at life. And I don't have the same wisdom as Solomon had, but he's looking at life and he's observing. When you go alone at it, you're miserable. When you have a companion, wow, it's so much better. There are certain activities in life that you need another to make it either doable or effective. Right? Have you ever tried to put up string lights for Christmas? Every year, such a frustrating activity. But if you have a companion and two letters, and it's up. I mean I wouldn't know. See? Someone helping us. There's there's there's so many activities in life, and I know many of us do it alone. Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna get to get to why we're doing it alone and why we're miserable doing it alone. But the idea is that that there's activities that are meant to be shared.

unknown 8:41

Yeah, it's true.

SPEAKER_00 8:42

And and and and joy and and done in partnership. So many of the things go so much better when you're not alone. I mean, even just the fact that you have somebody to do it together with, it's it's already makes such a big difference. Yeah, it's true. Uh it just emotionally, I'm not alone tackling this enormous task, whatever that is, or this challenging task. Also, we have blind spots. You know, somebody needs to cover our six, as they say in the the military. You know, and we're not fighting wars at this point, and Solomon did some of that, but but there's, you know, God designed us that our eyes have just about this much, a little less than 180 degree angle. That's all we see. Everything outside of these angles, you know, the farther you move your hands out, you see them for a little bit, and then they're they're gone out of your sight. You're completely blind. There's stuff about ourselves that we don't see. You know, there's you probably, if you're a little older, you probably can't even scratch the back in the middle of your back. And uh I'm talking about. I refuse to confirm or deny that. We you know, we have our vulnerabilities. And and and in a time when this was, you know, people fought military battles or or they were attacked on a road like that robber that uh Ganji was talking, uh, the the Samaritan, not the Samaritan, the the Jewish person that was going down the road and was attacked by the robbers. You know, if you have somebody get your back, you you can you can defend yourself. Isn't that true emotionally? If somebody got uh you know, even if you get attacked or you get challenged or you get criticized, if you have people in your corner and though, I know you, there might be some truth to that criticism, but I know who you are in the in your heart of hearts, and I'm with you, I support you, you can lean on me. There were times in my life that that that that meant so much to me. Yeah. Uh the people that were there. But over uh uh, you know, but we we are part of a very individualistic society. We actually think going out alone is heroic. I'm sure you've seen some of the Western movies. That the the lone warrior, the lone cowboy, the the person, you know, just galloping away with his horse at the end of the movie after killing all these bad guys, all alone. And and and the loneliness is a little even a little attractive to the women in the movies, and all of that, and you think we think that's that's you know, somehow it got into our mind that this is who we should be. We need to be at John Wayne or Clinton Eastwood and and just be able to have that rugged individualism that's so part of Western culture. Yeah, let me tell you, that's not from the Bible, that is from Hollywood. So the Bible encourages us not to go at it alone, but go at it together with others in community. There's so much strength. Uh I'm shared some of this uh research with you guys earlier from this book, The Good Life. The book summarizes uh now now more than close to 90-year-old research that was done by Harvard University about happiness. And uh I you know it's it's fascinating. I'm not gonna get into the details of the study that they've done. Uh they they that was right down right here in Boston with some doc workers and some uh Harvard graduates and and all people from all kinds of life, and they followed them, their children, their grandchildren, for almost 90 years now. Their study still continues, actually. Uh here's here's a quote from the the introduction of the book that I really like. It goes, the good life is a complicated life for everybody. The good life is joyful and challenging, full of love, but also pain. And it never strictly happens. Instead, the good life unfolds through time. It is a process, it includes turmoil, calm, lightness, burdens, struggles, achievements, setbacks, leaps forward, and terrible falls. And of course, good life always ends in death.

unknown 13:44

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 13:45

Love that. Love that quote. Is it doesn't that describe life? But you know, when we share it, there's some blessings to it. You know, Jesus in Matthew 18 tells this idea that having two or three people coming together in his name. In verse 8, uh chapter Matthew 18, verses 19 to 20. Again, I tell you that if few of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them. Right? Jesus encourages us to do things together. Even to pray for things. Now, prayer can be an individual thing, but I can also share. Can you please pray for this for me? And I already involved and included somebody in my life through that. When was the last time you asked somebody to pray for you? You know, there's something happens where more than one person is praying for the same thing. So, what is the significance of this teaching? Well, number one, it isn't that Jesus is only with us when we gather. Matthew 28, verse 20 says, I am with you always till the very end of this age. You know, when you become a disciple, you get baptized, you continue to follow Jesus, he is with you. The Holy Spirit lives in you. Wherever you go. So, what is the special way that Jesus is with the disciples when we gather? You know, he's there with them. I think it is, it is, you know, when we gather and come to a spiritual agreement that's better, more in line with Jesus' will than trying to make spiritual discernments on our own. I think there's it's this is a wisdom teaching. When we gather to assess things, this is the passage actually is talking about assessing if somebody is willing to be following Jesus together with the church and and having to maybe even put somebody out of the church. That's a hard decision to make. But it's in the Bible. And Jesus tells us don't make things, decisions like that alone, gather and try to agree in my name, and I'm gonna support that decision. Even if it's not perfect, but it will be more in line with what Jesus tells us. There is something to be done about communal decision making. And uh, you know, it didn't say 30 people gathered together, because 30 people will never make a decision together. But but having a at least you know a small community figure things out. And and if somebody is kind of like, ah, it doesn't sound so good to me, then take a step back and keep talking and keep praying and keep assessing the situation. You know, do you involve a group of people in your decision making? Do you here's you know, here's what I'm thinking about doing. Let me get a couple of guys and uh and share it with them, ask them to pray for it, and uh give them some time to contemplate it, and then get back together and discuss it again. You know, if you want to do the will of God, that is a great way to go about it. Amen? Uh here's another quote from the book, a couple couple, a couple more quotes. Uh this is again at the end of the uh the first chapter, I think, or uh in the introduction, they're they kind of start out with their conclusion. They say, but one thing continuously demonstrates its broad and enduring importance: good relationships. In fact, good relationships are significant enough that if we had to take all 84 years of the Harvard study and boil it down to a single principle for living, one life investment that is supported by similar findings across a wide variety of other studies, it would be this good relationships keep us healthier and happier. That's it. 85 years of studying and research. The key, good relationships. Is it isn't it better together? Another quote I love the you know as their conclusion that they studied the people who were the most satisfied in their relationship at age 50 were the healthiest mentally and physically at age 80. So I don't know how you want to do your 80s. Here's the time to invest into meaningful, satisfying relationships now. Uh even if you're not 50 yet. So the Bible tells us that we're better off together. Relationships matter. God created us for this, and uh that's that actually is my second point. We are created for connection. Uh you know, in the creation account in Genesis chapter 2, verse 18, God actually makes this statement. The Lord God said, It is not good for man to be alone. Now, Adam was alone at this point. Now, God creates him a suitable helper, a wife, but through this, God also starts out the multiplication of humans. And and and not, you know, not just remaining for man to be alone. I love uh uh this Michelangelo painting. You know what I love about it? It shows Adam to be alone, right? But God is with a host of other other creatures in heaven. Uh, you know, there's there's there's a communal heaven and Adam being alone on earth. And God goes, that's not right. We gotta fix this. And that was God's plan. To create more humans. We are created. When we function alone, God goes, ain't good. And that's the first time when God, you know, after in the creation account, after every day, God creates something. What does God say? God sow it and it was good. And when He creates humans, he actually says it's very good. But only after He created the male and female. And at that point, when we start out with Adam, he this is the first time that in the whole creation account God goes, This is not good. Something is missing. And uh I'm grateful for all the women that God created, but I think it's also the relationships that were in there with fellow humans that God created. You know, um, we need this, and God, the church, the community of followers of Jesus is God's ultimate plan for humanity this side of heaven. This is God's ultimate plan. As imperfect as it is, as as you know, that's probably an understatement. As broken we are as members and humans, and uh, you know, we still retain our sinful nature that we fight against it now and not just give into it, thank God. We do hurt each other from time to time and sin against each other. I'm sorry, that happens, but with all of that, it is still God's plan for humans in this world. That's what Jesus established, and and it will get better when we get to the other side. Heaven will be so much better than the church ever was or will be. When we expect the church. To be heaven, we're gonna be disappointed. But here's, but we still need the imperfect church. Because the only way to get to heaven is with the community. You're not gonna make it alone. That's what the Hebrew writer says in verse 24 and 25 of chapter 10. He says, Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess. For he who promises faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another all the more as you see the day approaching. Right? You know, heaven's gonna be here. Life goes by so fast. In just a couple months, well, three months, Virag and I would be here for three years now. Didn't that go by fast? I mean, what just happened? My my daughter and her husband just celebrated their one-year wedding anniversary last couple weeks ago. I'm like, we were just done there for the wedding. How did the one year go by? The older you are, the faster time goes. Have you noticed that? Yeah. So it really isn't about trying to make this life the best we can, but it is how we can make it all the way to finish the race with God. That's what it's all about. And for that, you need this imperfect church. You need to keep meeting, keep prioritizing this, keep coming together for the sake of the relationships that God created in this community. Looking at the shortness of life, Mark Twain, the famous author, wrote this. There isn't time, so briefly is life, for bickerings, apologies, hardburnings, calling to account. There is only time for loving and but an instant, so to speak, for that. You know, when you look at how short life is, you probably come to the same conclusion as Solomon writing Ecclesiastes. You know, if you try to try to just make life happy and do it, and uh you're gonna be miserable. There's something else that we're living for beyond this life. And when we live for that life, our life here actually is happier. Because we realize the value of relationship. And my last point, which I'm probably gonna talk more about it as we go uh throughout the summer, relationships are learned. You know, nobody is born with this amazing relationship-building ability. You know, and that's not how we come to this world. We have the capacity as humans to love and be loved. That's how everybody comes to this world. But like tying our shoes or anything else, we need to learn how to live in relationships. Uh here's uh here's another quote from the book. It says, few things affect the quality of our lives as much as our connections to others. As we said many times before, human beings are primary social animals. Uh, the implications of that fact may be much vaster than many of us realize. Basic education is sometimes referred to as the three R's reading, writing, and arithmetic. Because early education is meant to prepare students for life, we believe there should be a fourth R in basic education, relationships. So this two scientists notice how how our society does not equip us for great relationships. There's no course on relationships in school. You know, how do you learn what you what you learn? You just imitate people that you see. And you yeah, trial and error sometimes. And we we imitation, you imitate everything that you see, you feel like it's normal. So you imitate the the healthy stuff with the dysfunction as well. Thank God that Jesus came to teach us about relationships, and not just Jesus, but also one another. In Titus chapter 2, Paul writes to Titus about this idea of teaching disciples training and teaching fellow disciples. He says, You must teach what is in accord with Sun doctrine. Teach the older man to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, inside in faith, in love, and in endurance. Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. They can then train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything, set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching, show integrity, seriousness, and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us. Teach slaves to be subject to their masters in everything, to try to please them, not to talk back to them and not to steal from them, but to show that they can be fully trusted, so that in every way they will make the teaching about our God, our Savior, attractive. And then in verse 15 he concludes, These then are the things you should teach. Encourage and rebuke with all authority. Do not let anyone despise you. You know, when Paul is communicating to Titus, a fellow church leader, of how a church life should happen, there's a lot of teaching going on. There's a lot of training happening in the church. And when you notice, maybe you paid attention, what are the topics? It's two things: character and relationships. Your character, self-control, discipline, integrity, honesty, that's character things. And then there's love, there's respect, there's there's submission, there's there's all kinds of relational qualities as well. Sometimes I think I make the mistake that I assume that we all know how to do these things. And honestly, we don't. And that's okay. Because we can learn. But you only will learn once you recognize that there's something that needs to be learned. Confucius said the following By three methods we may learn wisdom. First by reflection, which is the noblest, second by imitation, which is the easiest, and third by experience, which is the bitterest. I think that those are those are valid observations, wouldn't you say? You know, I think if we don't imitate the good relational things we see one another in the church, we miss out on an easy and painless learning. We can. Romans 15, 14. This is my last scripture for today. Paul tells the disciples in Rome, many of them he never met, but he tells them that he was convinced. He says, I am my myself am convinced, my brothers. And by extension, he's also talking to the sisters, but in that society he would only address the man in the room. My brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, complete in knowledge, and competent to instruct one another. There is a learning that needs to happen in our midst. That's God's plan. How do I get better at relationships? Here's a question: if relationships are learned, how can we as a church model and teach godly, healthy, wholesome, relating to each other? I hope we're gonna have some practical, practicable answers to this question throughout this summer. As we strive to get closer, to do things together, and to relate to one another in healthier and healthier ways, honoring God with that. I'll finish with a quote from the book. Uh it says, How do you move further along on your path towards a good life? First, by recognizing that the good life is not a destination, it is the path itself and the people who are walking it with you. As you walk, second by second, you can decide to whom and to what you give your attention. Week by week, you can prioritize your relationships and choose to be with the people who matter. Year by year, you can find purpose and meaning through the lives that you enrich and the relationships that you cultivate. By developing your curiosity and reaching out to others, family, loved ones, co-workers, friends, acquaintances, even strangers, with one thoughtful question at a time, one moment of devoted, authentic attention at a time, you strengthen the foundation of a good life. This is the conclusion of 85 years of studying how to be happy. So I want to challenge all of us. Let's put some intentionality into our relationship. Let's prioritize coming together as God designed us to do. Because when we do, something happens. You see something, you observe something, you imitate something, you know, you see an example, you learn, you say something. Well, why are you doing it that way? And then we learn and grow in our relationships. It's not a destination, it's the path and the people you're walking with. Questions for discussion and thought. Do I understand the importance of relationships for my well-being and happiness? You know, when I think about how happy I am, what comes to mind first? Is it relationships? How have I allowed an individualist society and culture to shape my thinking? And lastly, what steps can I take this week or over the summer to intentionally invest in learning and growing in my relationships? Thank you so much for listening to me.