EP01 From banking to broadcasting: Katja Mia's meteoric rise to success

What happens when you walk away from the "sensible" path... and bet on yourself instead? 

In the very first episode of The Delusional Optimist, I'm joined by broadcaster, model and Six O'Clock Show presenter Katja Mia for an honest, unfiltered conversation about career pivots, backing yourself before it makes sense and the resilience it takes to build something bigger than your comfort zone. 

This episode is for anyone sitting in the "messy middle," feeling stuck, second-guessing themselves, or quietly dreaming of something more.

Loved this conversation? Follow Katja Mia's journey on Instagram here.

Transcript

Introducing Katja Mia

SPEAKER_02 0:07

Hello there and welcome to the Delusional Optimist Podcast. My name is Diana Bonici, and I am so, so grateful you are here today for our very first episode. This is a podcast about fresh starts and new beginnings, and it's really a podcast that I hope you will feel inspired, listening to, and very much seen and reassured that no matter what the season in life you are in, you are not alone. Whether you're feeling stuck, lost, or left behind, maybe you're navigating life's messy middle, or maybe you're dreaming of starting again, whether professionally or personally, I really hope this podcast will encourage you to take that next step bravely, quietly, and perfectly, and pursue whatever dream it is you're chasing. Each week I'll be sitting down with inspiring guests who've taken a chance on themselves, people who've pushed through doubt and reinvention, heartbreak and burnout, pivots and plot twists, and come out stronger on the other side. And no, this isn't about toxic positivity. It's about resilient optimism, the kind that carries you through any chapter of life. So if you need a reminder that the best is yet to come, you are in the right place. And I truly can't imagine a more beautiful way to kick off the podcast than with today's guest. Katcha Mia is a broadcaster lighting up both radio and television screens across Ireland. She's a model, a style icon, a bride-to-be, and an all-around gorgeous human inside and out. And I love Akatcha's story so much. It's one of reinvention, grit, and the courage to back herself. And I really think you're going to take so much for my chat. Enjoy. Katcha Mia, welcome to the Delusional Optimist.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm delighted to be on.

SPEAKER_02 2:05

Yeah, I'm so, so excited to have you on. Um, I'm a big fan of yours, and I really think you embody the delusional optimist spirit. You're so ambitious, you embrace reinvention, you've backed yourself at times, even if the dream that you were chasing wasn't necessarily sitting right in front of you. And I just feel like you are, I don't know, impossible not to love.

SPEAKER_00 2:28

So I'm excited to um chat to you. And I have to say, I love the title of this podcast, Delusional Optimism, because I feel like that is how I go through life. Being like delusionally optimistic is the only way to like think positive and always assume the best. But I also want to state that I'm a big fan of you. I did I watched you on TV growing up, and I like because you were one of the few presenters at the time, like, oh, she's so she's so young and hip and cool, and she's got a really like a different name, and she's so beautiful, and I loved your style of presenting. And I think when I was young, it was really inspiring to see someone like that on the screen, and I was like, I I would love to do what she's doing, so yeah, I feel like you were a trial blazer as well yourself, I have to say.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

Thank you so much. I definitely would not have described myself as hip or cool in any way. Uh chaos I was chaotic.

SPEAKER_00 3:26

Because I think you went to the same stage school as me. Like we both I went to West Side. You went to West Side too, didn't you? Yeah. And um, and I feel like I because I just remember when when the younger classes would go and do the shows, and I think a lot of the past pupils would come back and you were one of them, and everyone looked up to you.

SPEAKER_02 3:46

That's so nice, but also like it just I know I'm I'm originally European, I'm very much Irish at this stage, and I'm like, oh, confidence.

SPEAKER_00 3:55

Yeah, I know, I know, I know. We're all the same, it's like embedded in us.

SPEAKER_02 4:00

Well, look, two fangirls geeking out over each other is you know a welcome scenario. Um, you are in quite a busy season of your life between your broadcasting work, you've now done your linen jewelry edit, you're getting married. Um, how are you feeling in the midst of it all?

Wedding planning & dress shopping

SPEAKER_00 4:20

Oh, overwhelmed, girl. It's um it's been busy. Like I literally got off a wedding planning call there. Um, so it's juggling it all has been tricky, but at the same time, like it's just go, go, go. It's like I really don't have time to like reflect on, oh, this is too stressful, or this is that. Like, if this is just the situation, grateful to be busy. It's it's it's so amazing to have work. Like, I know the the media industry can be fickle, and like it is it's competitive too. So when you get to have the opportunity to be on TV, to be on radio, uh, to get to do collaborations that you know I could only dream of, like, it is amazing. So I just I try to always change my mental mentality to that, like that optimistic mentality, the gratitude all the time. Because when you are busy, it's like you could go down two paths, it could be like, oh, why me, or just be grateful for it and keep pushing on. So it's been overwhelming, but it's been fun, and I'm trying to be present to enjoy the ride because especially with wedding planning, like this is only going to come around once. Well, I hope so. So I'm just really trying to be in the moment. And like last week we went wedding dress shopping with my maid of honor and my sister, and all of those moments, like, and you know this because you only got married recently yourself. I saw on Instagram that it's like it, it's it's such they're such magical moments. So I I want I want to be present in them as much as possible.

SPEAKER_02 5:48

They are magical, but there is an element of stress involved as well. Like, I have to be honest, I really enjoyed the process, but my god, the levels of stress, like I was working full-time, fine, no problem. Trying to juggle all these meetings, trying to keep a relationship alive, and my husband was like traveling a lot, like running the household, everything all together. But for me, I think I kind of I got bogged down in the things they tell you not to get bogged down on, which was like what the little details. And really, at the end of the day, they really don't matter because really the most important thing are the people that are there, they're having a time, they've gathered to celebrate you. But in the moment, when you're planning, those details do feel very important.

SPEAKER_00 6:31

No, like just the little things like the flowers, whether you want petals on the aisle or not, or can you have the late night snack? Like right now, it's all about late night snacks and what else, what kind of drinks can we have on the menu? And like at the end of the day, like you're just gonna remember the party and how much of a good time everyone had, the music probably, and the drinks. So yeah, I'm yeah, with the little details, it's so easy to like to let them kind of overwhelm you. But I'm trying to think, okay, once everyone's dancing, once everyone's eating and they're fed and they have drinks, like they're gonna be good. Your guests will remember it as a great wedding.

SPEAKER_02 7:10

Have you been a chilled outbride so far, or have you have you indulged in the other side, which is getting like me a bit caught up in things?

SPEAKER_00 7:18

I would say people would describe me as a chilled outbride. Uh, only because I'll give you an example. Like with the wedding dress, we had one day to go wedding dress shopping, and we went to Kavan, and I just felt it was like the third dress I tried on. I was like, Yeah, that's the one. Yeah, let's just go with that one. And it was so such a smooth process, and everyone was kind of like, Wait, are you are you sure? Like, do you want to just go somewhere and like think about this? And I was like, No, no, no, it's fine. So, in ways I can be chill, but when I sit with Darren, like we talk about whether we want a cake or not, or whether we're doing this, I'm like, no, we need it. So I think I'm 50-50. Like, there's certain things like with the dresses, I suppose maybe uh because I go to uh events and stuff, and I I would have dressed up before I'm I know what works on my body. Maybe that's why I feel more comfortable in that department. But in terms of planning, like I still very much care, and like he's more taking the chill route, and I'm like, no, we need this, we need to have these details, like this is important. So I would to answer your question be 50-50.

SPEAKER_02 8:20

Yeah, uh upon reflection, I think I was the same, except opposite to you. The only thing I really cared, like truly was like obviously Steve wanted really good music, and obviously I wanted that too because it sets the vibe. I really love flowers, so that was the thing that I was getting like really caught up in. But outside of the the smaller details, it was the dress. I went to about nine boutiques, and I had this vision in my head that I wasn't finding, which I quickly had to like change my mind and be more open. Yeah, but I think I I felt the pressure of feeling you're most beautiful, you have to look perfect in the dress, and I did not feel that like I just felt like I felt rotten in everything I was putting on, if I'm honest.

SPEAKER_00 9:01

It's so much pressure we put on ourselves, isn't it?

SPEAKER_02 9:04

Yeah, and you are having an abroad wedding. Yeah, I'm guessing it's somewhere sunny.

SPEAKER_00 9:12

Yes, somewhere sunny because I can't with the rain that we're having right now.

SPEAKER_02 9:18

I don't even want to imagine that. A piece of maybe unwanted advice. If you are planning on wearing boob tape, please practice the assembly of that boob tape or the body tape because that one thing alone had me walking up the aisle extremely late. Like, yes. Oh my god, I know we got married in Ireland, and it's obviously not the hottest place on the planet, but the week in May that we got married just happened to be obscenely warm. Also, when we're in the castle, which is you know an older building, um, no work on. And between the stress of like trying to get ready, like the heat and everything, my my body tape would not stick on. I literally spent 20 minutes, went through an entire role. Now, this was a brand I hadn't used before, and I'm now talking like I was oh, it was not, it was not, it was not a fun time.

SPEAKER_00 10:13

So please, nothing worse than when boob tape is slipping and you can feel it unraveling there, and you're like, Oh no, I totally understand. Yeah, I'm gonna try my best to like I don't know if I need to core set myself in so I don't need to go for the boob tape right, or maybe I will, but I'll make sure I have like four or five rolls on deck just in case because it will be really hot.

SPEAKER_02 10:37

Yeah, are you gonna do an outfit change? Is there any detail about the wedding you can tell us? Because I know everyone is just so excited. You're gonna be, I know you're just gonna be completely stunning.

SPEAKER_00 10:48

Thank you. Like, I'm really I'm really excited to kind of play into some of the looks. I there will be an outfit change. Um, I'm only uh I only picked it up. Well, I didn't pick it up, I only like got it and ordered it last week, so it's still there's a alterations to be made, but yes, there is gonna be an outfit change for the drama. Why not?

Katja's fiancé pulled out all the stops at their Burundian engagement ceremony

SPEAKER_02 11:09

Speaking of drama and ceremony, um, your Burundian wedding ceremony was absolutely spectacular. Sorry, engagement ceremony was absolutely um spectacular, and I loved that your fiance Dara um he made a speech in your native tongue.

SPEAKER_00 11:25

In my native language, like he did his whole speech in Kirundy, like that. It was such a great um it was it was a great moment for the family in whole, and like just the a nice opportunity to introduce Dara and his family to the Burundian culture because it's such a huge part of my life, because even though I am Irish, like my heritage is Burundi, my parents are Brundi Burundian, and like they they speak the native tongue at home, so it's a huge part of my heart. So bringing them there was just amazing, and uh yeah, like they do engagement ceremonies pretty big over there. They they love an engagement ceremony, and I think to them, uh once you're traditionally engaged, like you might as well be married, like you gain the respect from the elders, they're like, come on, welcome to the family. Like Darrow was literally like he was inducted into the family and they and they loved him. Um, but he learned the speech. Um, like we were on the plane over, it was such such a long plane journey. You go from Dublin to Brussels, then we went from Brussels to Zurich, Zurich to Bujamburga, like it was a whole day. But he had his little pen and paper on the plane, and he was learning it with my dad because my dad was trying to teach me how to say it phonetically and everything. Um, and honestly, I thought he was just gonna do a sentence or two in the native language, make everyone chuckle, and then switch back to English because we had a translator at the ceremony, but then he just kept going and going, and my eyes just widened and my jaw just dropped. I'm like, he's really doing this, but he gained the respect of so many people in that room, and uh it became such a memorable, memorable event because of it as well.

SPEAKER_02 12:57

So yeah, it was great, just just such a great event, and to have him make such an effort for you and your family that almost I'm sure makes you fall in love with them all over again because you're like, look at him, he's really putting himself out there.

SPEAKER_00 13:11

Yeah, he's yeah, it was so sweet. Like, because he it was it was a real test because that could it could have gone wrong, and um, I know myself because I'm not completely fluent in QD. When I make a mistake, my cousins laugh at me. So it was it was a very like uh it's a fine line he was walking, but he smashed it. And I think that's just him in a nutshell though. Like he's he's super caring, um, he's like full of effort and just wanting to make other people feel at home and feel welcome. So I'm I'm also kind of not surprised that he did it, but it was it was such a beautiful surprise to have him do it too.

SPEAKER_02 13:49

Yeah, looking back at that whole trip, because I know it was his first time in Burundi, and I'm sure you hadn't, well, I'm assuming you hadn't been yourself in some time. Don't ask me why, I'm assuming it's just a big journey to me. So you think you're not there all the time. What was the highlight from the whole trip? Because I know you went to like your dad's a village and you met family members and did all these incredible things that are, you know, it's not an everyday experience.

SPEAKER_00 14:15

Oh, so many. Um, because I like like what you said, like I don't get to go there often. I'd been there three times before, but the last time I was there was 14 years ago. I was a teenager, so like I'm going to Brundi and with completely different lenses now and much more appreciation. And uh I think the highlight for me for sure was going to my dad's village, Kiganda. That's where his my grandparents' house is. They've passed now, but they're buried on the land. And and we had a whole cousins' reunion there, and we got to bring all of our we had friends from from Ireland, so Dara and his brother, and then my maid of honour, and her partner, who's Bosnian, and then my mom's colleague and her daughter, who are both from Ukraine but live in Ireland. So it was like a whole mix of cultures there, and everyone falling in love with Brundi simultaneously, and like me falling in love with it, in love with it all over again. So I think that was the highlight, just getting to show people the country, getting to connect with my homeland, like literally where my dad was born, um, and just seeing, seeing locals. Brundi is one of the, I think it has the second largest lake in the world, is there Lake Tanganika? And we got to do a lakeside trip as part of our two-week stay there, and just taking in the beauty of the country. And I a lot of the times because Brundi is such a poor country that you know people forget about the beauty that exists there. So it was it was nice, it was it was eye-opening and uh getting to appreciate it from a whole different lens. So I that was the biggest goal for me. Like I kind of left it feeling like a little hole in my heart. I was like kind of homesick. I was like, I want I want to go back there, I want to make sure, make it my mission to try to revisit every year or two. Um, I would love to work on a charity there one day because you know it is it was also really touching, you know, seeing the amount of poverty there and and the young children. Um, and there's there's a big gap with it, obviously, people that can be well to do, and then people that obviously live with next to nothing. So um you almost leave it appreciating your life so much more. Um, and I know here in Ireland I'm like, I might complain about this, and this dress doesn't fit me, and I have to work for seven days in a row, and I have to do this. I'm like, but in the grand scheme of things, I'm so lucky. So yeah, it changed my perspective, which I was very grateful for.

Growing up feeling 'different'

SPEAKER_02 16:39

I did see recently you you said that you were um a product of your parents' bravery, which I thought was such a lovely way of honoring their brave leap of emigrating and leaving Burundi and starting out a new life, and then the success that you're building, because you know you're not doing it just for yourself, you're also doing it to make them proud too, which is so nice. What was it like growing up in a multicultural family here in Ireland? Did you feel different? Um, did you feel like you were treated differently to your classmates? Um, I suppose I when I moved to Ireland, I was eight and I didn't speak the language, I definitely was different, but I looked like everybody else. So you didn't really know different until I opened my mouth.

SPEAKER_00 17:21

That's still an adjustment for you, though. It's like things that people can't see, but then the language barrier, and even you might relate to this, like even going home and like with Irish homework, and your parents are like, I can't help you here.

SPEAKER_02 17:32

Yeah, you're on your own with this one.

SPEAKER_00 17:36

Yeah, so it was a lot of things like that because I know going to primary school, I think I was the only black girl in my in my primary school class up until I left. Um, so you do look at yourself completely differently, you know. Um like I I did I felt comfortable there and I loved my my school experience, but I think internally you're kind of like, Why am I so different? And like I had bigger lips and I had I probably developed my curves a little bit earlier. And it's funny because it's all the things that people want now, they get lip injections and all that stuff, but it wasn't cool to have big lips instead. And I I remember like vividly, I used to like pinch my lips in, I used to hide them a bit more because I thought they were so big. So, like different things that you look at yourself and you notice, oh, I'm different. And that's just the curiosity of a child. But I was very lucky before, but because when I came home, my parents really reinforce like our self-worth and that we're beautiful just the way we are, to be proud of our language, to be proud of the food that we eat, the culture. So I think that like as well, having the language spoken at home, like they just reinforced that so much. So it forced me to grow up with the dual kind of culture at home. So I embraced the Irish side, but also the Burundian side a lot more. Um, and my dad, when I was really young, actually, he um he started a Burundian drumming group in Ireland. He was one of the first ones, and they they performed at my school, and I remember all the kids and teachers thinking, Oh my god, your dad is so cool. So once he did that, I was like, Yeah, my culture is really cool.

SPEAKER_01 19:17

Like, I'm I'm proud of it.

Gratitude for parents bravery

SPEAKER_00 19:18

So yeah, it was it it can be tricky in ways, especially when you're a child just trying to navigate, you know, two worlds colliding. But um, I think my parents did a good job, and I think when you grow up as an immigrant, you're so much more self-aware. Like you're so aware of the sacrifices, you're so aware that your parents are now they left somewhere and they're starting from the bottom. Like my my mom worked as a secretary for a Japanese car company in Brundi, but she spoke French. So when she came to Ireland, her skills didn't transfer. So then she uh worked, I think her she worked in like a spa or like um a super value after like a supermarket, which now she's been there for 25 years, but I was so aware that you know she couldn't do what she loved to do, and she just had to get on with it. And then as well, her like she couldn't take English classes because she was kind of once when she wasn't working, she was a full-time mom. So we had to teach her English. So we were she was like at home, don't speak currently, speak English because I'm gonna learn through you guys, and it's so cute because even to this day, she might have the odds spelling mistake, but like her English is is perfect, but it's because she just learned it by year, just through her kids. So it's the it's those little things, and then even my dad who had worked in marketing his whole life in Germany and in Burundi, and then he came to Ireland and he could not find a job in marketing, and he kind of had to go down a different route. And I felt and he probably felt like his career dreams were never fulfilled. So when you see that in real time, I think it makes you so self-aware. So when you go for jobs now for me as an adult, I become so much more intentional because I'm like, I'm getting to do what they couldn't do. So I I become extremely intentional now with the work that I do, and I I think it's made me more hardworking because it's like I'm I'm carrying their dreams on my back as well. So um, yeah, so it's a it's a mixture of of feelings but of gratitude, of self-awareness. Um, but it also teaches you to to work hard and appreciate every opportunity that comes your way. So that's why that that video that I put up after getting the Linux campaign, I was like, no, this is really for them because it was a pride moment for them. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:36

It's funny, our stories, you know, our backgrounds are so different, but that they're so similar at the same time. Like my mom in Eastern Europe was a doctor, and you know, similar with my dad. He was an engineer, he came here, he worked in construction, he did various things. So they I also very much grew up with this like just deep desire to constantly make them proud because I realized how much they sacrificed and literally like. Like left behind their entire identities, and it's such a selfless thing to do because they did it for me and my brother, you know. Yeah, um, you know, I don't know if I could make such a big leap now. I just feel like they were so selfless and they just did both of our sets of parents, they just did what they had to do.

SPEAKER_00 22:19

Yeah, and they're probably the same ages that we are now, like they were kind of in their 30s. And I'm thinking that imagine if we just had to shake up our world and and move everything. Like it is such an act of of bravery from your your parents and mine and and any other immigrant parents out there. So it's uh I think that's the only way to phrase it. It's pure bravery. So because I don't know if I would be able to do it myself right now.

SPEAKER_02 22:42

Yeah, absolutely. Um, well, I feel like you know, they took a leap of faith, and your your story has also been about taking um leaps of faith because you did not start out in the media world and you made a really impressive transition in the last few years. Um obviously we know and love you as like the the host of the six o'clock show. You're brightening up our screens every evening, but you came from a different world. So tell me about that. Yeah, how did that all be different?

From working in banking to landing a TV gig

The first gig that gave her a taste of the possibilities ahead

SPEAKER_00 23:12

Um Yeah, so I had I I'd picked a finance subject for college. So I I went to Menneth University and I did economics and finance there. And it I I suppose I picked it because like economics and business were my favorite subjects in school. And I think back then when you guidance counsellors, they were just like, Oh, what are you good at? And like, what are your favorite subjects? Just do that. But I I didn't really consider the bigger picture that you know as a kid I really did love performing. I went to stage school from the age of four to about 16, 17, and I loved it. It was like my escape, but I think I just focused on school at the time. So I went into Manute, I did finance and economics, and uh after that four-year degree, I started working in a bank, um, as you as you would, but I rem just remember being like 22, 23, and my day was I come in at eight o'clock. I would make my porridge, make my tea, come to my desk, open up XL, put on headphones, listen to a podcast, and just like XL my life away. And it was almost I almost felt robotic. And I was like, this isn't me. Like I just had a moment where I was chatting to a colleague who was um who was there for a good few years, a bit older than me, and he was just saying how he like looks forward to like going home every day. And I'm like, Well, that he's not even happy, and like I'm only starting out here, I don't see myself happy here. So I that's when I my mentality started to change, being like, uh-oh, have we made a mistake here? What are we gonna do? But at the time I was reading a book called Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, so and it was all about what is tell yourself what is the worst thing that can happen if you leave a job? Like, what is the worst thing that can happen? What is the worst thing if someone tells you no? Okay, swallow that, move on. So it was kind of it was changing my approach to to life in a way, and you could say maybe I was having a quarter life crisis, but um uh when COVID hit, I was working in a different bank and I was really struggling. Like I put my hand up. I probably wasn't the best at the job, but I was like, it was I was being met with a lot of scrutiny from my bosses, it was a lot of pressure. I was working on weekends to make up deadlines. It was really, really stressful. Like I'd just be crying in my little box room with my computer set up, and then my parents would be like, You're just really unhappy. Um, so it was then where I kind of had a conversation with my parents, and I was like, I'm thinking of quitting my job, like I'm just so unhappy, but like I'll figure it out, like I always do. So just trust me. And they're like, Look, we support you. So I ended up quitting that, um, and then I did like a marketing course online just to I guess fill up time, like of what the next thing was. I did a marketing course online, and then I started as well just doing a lot of social media. So my sister was part of this um a collective called Girl Code. Um, there's a DJ, Mona Lisa, that used to run that. I don't know if you know her. But um through that, I started that was my introduction to like influencer events. Like they used to DJ at events, my sister was a photographer at it, so I would go. And it kind of opened up that world for me, and I kind of was exposed to it a bit. And I was like, huh, okay, maybe if I work on Instagram a bit more, like show up on stories, post outfit pictures like I would already do on Facebook. Maybe this could go somewhere. So I kind of just did that and I would yap, yap, yap on my stories. And um eventually this girl um who's a stylist, her name is Zeta. She's a stylist and she was curating a music show and she was like, You're always yapping on your Instagram, and I need a host for this event. Will you will you do it with this other guy? And I was like, Yeah, absolutely. So I took a day off work to do it, and it was like a 10-hour shoot day, but it honestly felt like 10 minutes. Like it was so much fun, it was so invigorating. I like it didn't even feel like work to me. And I was like, after that 10-hour day, I I went home to Dara and I was like, How do I make this a job? Like, how do I make this my thing to do? Um, so I just started like making small show reels of of everything and just clipping pieces together. Um, I applied for competitions, I ended up winning a presenter competition. It was like a presenter search competition across the UK and Ireland for My Jama. And um, I sent in an application just with my sister. I was interviewing her about skincare, and I was editing a lot because at the time I had a YouTube channel, so I learned how to edit on Final Cut Pro. So I made myself a little show reel, I sent it off, and then when I won that competition, it was another gateway into interviewing. So that's where I picked up some interview skills. It was a really cool introduction to kind of interviewing people and then working live on camera where you know you can't really make mistakes and you just kind of have to just go for it. Um, but from then I clipped more pieces and then I just started to send them into production companies and send them into Virgin Media and asked my agent, can you send a story to you? Or I'd like I didn't I didn't know how you got into those places. And so it just so happened that uh a producer from Ireland AM had followed me on Instagram and she saw me sharing one of my interviews, and then she asked, Would you like to come in and be a stylist? And I was like, I know nothing about fashion, but I come in and talk about pop culture if you wanted to, and the rest was kind of history, that's how it all began.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

That is uh incredible and so inspiring. I love that. Number one, you were teaching yourself the skills that you needed, number two, you were putting yourself out there. You may not have known the people, but you were literally inserting yourself into their space. Like, oh um, I can do this. I don't want to be away with it, but I can do it. Give me a chance. Um, when you got that Maya Jama opportunity, how did it feel that first day? You know that you're gonna go live to a community of people. Um, were you feeling the nerves, or were you quietly confident from the get-go that you've got this?

Face time with Maya Jama

SPEAKER_00 29:25

I was feeling the nerves. I don't think I could sit down that day, like because the first interview was happening. So I let's say I I won the competition on a Tuesday. They told me the first interview was happening on Sunday that week, and the first interview was with Maya Jama herself. I'm such a big fan of hers. Like, she's one of the presenters that I look up to and she's killing it. And she had so many Instagram followers, and the the Instagram live was on her page, and I have a screenshot of it of that moment because I think there was like a million people watching, and the nerves I like I can't even I don't know how to describe like how shook I was, but I kind of just got through it, and she was so nice. Like, she FaceTimed me before, and she had like a face mask on with a glass of red wine, and she was like, honey, this is just gonna be a little chat, like whatever, talk to me about anything, and let's do face mask at the same time. So it was so relaxed, like she really calmed down the nerves, and uh, like once once she was my first interview, I'm like, Well, it's it's only it's only up from here, it's only positives from here because we we started out with a bang, and um it was really cool actually. Her team invited uh me and some other ambassadors to go uh and feature in a music video that she was in. It was wild, Diana. So they flew us out to London, and there was um a music video that she was gonna feature her masks in, and it was a Swedish singer called Ida Lee who had a song with a UK rapper. So we go to London and we're on this set, and there's wardrobe, there's hair, there's makeup. Like this was so foreign to me. And then it was like, okay, so you're just gonna go into the shop with my jamma and you're just gonna be dancing, pretend you're in a hair salon, uh, and you're with friends. Like it was it was so surreal. And I'm so glad I I documented it because I was I had a small YouTube channel at the time, so I did log in and I documented it, and now like the YouTube channel is not up anymore. But now when I go back and look at the archives, I'm like, I can't believe that was just a day in my life. But so it's it's got it goes back to me trying to be as present as possible and filming bits when I can because sometimes you genuinely can't believe you've done something and you're not really in the moment, but then after you go home and look at it and you're like, okay, that's crazy. I did that, but um, yeah, no, it it was great. They were it was great to work with them for that first year because it was all at home. Like I was just doing Instagram live interviews at home. I'd find a little corner with some good natural light, I'd have my questions ready, I'd prep them, I'd do the research. So it was it was actually great um learning and training for what I do now on on Virgin Media because it's kind of similar.

SPEAKER_02 32:02

Was that not a little like I find that can also be it's sometimes a little bit more daunting because you're in your own space, you're waiting for someone to let you like you know, kind of like a Zoom to let you be broadcast to so many people. You're just kind of like, are we gonna vibe? What's the vibe gonna be? Like, is the connection gonna be okay? I know the like, especially if you know that there's such a big platform and so many people watching, and you're just at home and you're trying to be in a professional space and headspace, but during your own training used to being chill.

SPEAKER_00 32:37

No, like I'd much prefer a sat when I was in there because one of the interviews, the one that I did with Dominic Skinner, it was gas. I was at home, but the way like I had those French blinds in them in the apartment at the time, and the way the sun was setting, like I had just like the blind lines on my face, and I just kept shifting my chair as the interview went on to maintain the natural light. And he was probably like, What is this girl doing?

SPEAKER_01 33:02

Me thinking that no one's gonna notice, but you you just you just gotta do what you gotta do. But it was really good experience, though.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

Yeah, sometimes when you think of like the early days, you know, the early projects or the early opportunities, and you're like, What was I doing? Yeah, when I think of my early days on TV, kind of like you, I honestly had no training, bar like they, you know, once I got the job in RTE, again, it was like an open nationwide search. And honestly, I have no idea how I got the job because I was so shy. So I don't know how I ended up being in that lineup, but I was so shy that I was almost like everything I said, I was uncertain or would question myself. Do you know what I mean? Like I knew that I was saying the right thing, but I was so insecure that I would then just like run off and like re-live that in my head 10 times over and be like, yeah, stop out. Um so I have no idea how I got the job, but I did, and I was very grateful. But we just had like a week of like dry runs in our in our studio. Once that studio was set up, and they did not go very well. We had three completely untrained presenters like doing this for the first time, you know, three different personalities, three a bit chaotic. Me who would just like get by and go amused, the two guys who had just more energy than like this classroom of children, you know. Um, and then like a week later, we're live on air on RTE, and it's just like go. So, yeah, sometimes I struggle. I'm like, I don't want to see those tapes ever again because I remember how uncomfortable it felt. But also I remember the elation of like, oh my god, I did that. I did that, and nothing bad happened. The world didn't stop spinning. Yes, I messed up those lines, but everything was okay. You know what? Next time I won't be as great.

Managing nerves before going on air

SPEAKER_00 34:47

Um, yes, it's so easy to spiral in your mind before you go live on air and then you do it, and then you're like, Oh, I survived it. Like, even sometimes when me and Brian are doing the six o'clock show and it's a really interview-heavy show. Like, let's say we've two guests for segment one, two guests for segment two, and then another interview segment three. It's like these are five people that we're chatting to, and then we're like, How are we gonna remember all these questions? But then the show's over, and you're like, Oh god, that was grand. So it's it's it's funny what you know you can tell yourself, but then when nerves come into play, I always say nerves are good because it's like adrenaline, and you just you just do it. And it shows that you care, like you're invested, you want that to be good. Yeah, I think I'm a bit like you, like you said, like you can be a bit shy before you're on camera. Like, I I'm kind of similar, like I can be a bit bit quiet, um, or like kind of go into myself a little bit, but then when the camera goes on, I'm like ready to go. And I'm like, who is that person? Because I think a lot of people that know me would say, like, yeah, I can be mad and whatever when I'm around like family or really close friends, but sometimes I can't come across really shy. And then I work with Brian, who is like larger than life personality, so it's it's funny like seeing the two of us before an interview. I might be like a bit chatty or chat to one person in the corner, and he's entertaining the whole room. And then when we go live, we're like both of us are 50-50, and then it ends, and I'm back to being like, Oh, hi, that's really nice, thank you. Like, just back into my shell a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 36:17

So I relate to what you said a lot.

SPEAKER_02 36:19

Yeah, I'm just like even as you're talking and I'm thinking about you know, studio times, there were so many, like, I remember some proper clangers, not even just like just dynamic of live air, you know, being live air. I remember interviewing JS. We were supposed to be doing like a JLS special, but JLS were delayed coming in from the airport in the M50, and like our show was only 20 minutes, it was a children's magazine program, you know, 20 minutes of live TV. You have this whole special built around a band, including games. All the VTs are JLS. There's meant to be like this, you know, three or four bursts of interview, and there's no band. So I make a show while while you're already live with no band. So you're like trying to rearrange VTs and come up with things on the spot because even the games you were supposed to play, you can't play. And yeah, how did I do that? Like, how did we survive? How did we survive? Um have you ever had any moments like that?

SPEAKER_00 37:20

When the Pope died, we were we were going live and he hadn't he hadn't died yet, but like the like all the cameras on the news, because we're we share a studio with the news, yeah. All the cameras were in the Vatican and it was all around um it was all around like different people and cardinals coming in, whatever. And then our producer was like, the Pope may pass while you're live on air, and if that happens, we're gonna have to do an announcement and we're gonna have to cut to uh it was Caroline Tuhig who was a newsreader, she's gonna do a special with us. So it was all like thinking on our feet, and then it just so happened that the minute we introed the show, the black smoke appeared and the pope had passed, and it was like cut to the new auto cue straight away. So you're kind of like anything can happen. And because the show has to be relevant, you you're you're gonna have to address relevant things that happen or events, or you might have to announce when someone passes away. And it's just kind of it's staying ready for those moments and staying on your you stay on your toes quite a lot when you're a presenter, and you do have like so many thoughts because you're like, How can I execute this the right way? Like, is my delivery correct? Like, is the odd can I read the auto queue? I haven't done like a practice round with this auto cue yet. So it's it's a lot of things, but I kind of I love the thrill of it. I I'd be lying if I say I didn't like the thrill of all the changes.

SPEAKER_02 38:39

You'd have to, you wouldn't survive otherwise. Yeah, the thing is it's like such a mental workout for your brain, like by the end of that hour or half an hour, however long it might be, even if it's five minutes of being in that scenario, like it is a You're exhaustive. Yeah, it's a mental workout. Um, so let's go back to the Maya Jama opportunity. Um, how long then between you know being on Seth on her music video and doing all these fun interviews um on Instagram to getting your next opportunity and what kept you going in the in-between? Because it can be it can be an experience and such an emotional crash when you're going from something so exciting to then just back to normal life and you're trying to figure out the next where the next door will open, but you're not quite certain. So, what kept you going in those moments? And uh how did you navigate the next opportunity?

Out of a job, on social welfare - what's next?

Double jobbing in secret

SPEAKER_00 39:34

Yeah, like um you're right when when you when you say that, like it's all exciting when you're in the moment, but at that time I have to remember I was out of a job. Um, I was on social welfare at the time, and it was literally like what like each opportunity after the next, like I would just chase the next opportunity or continue to put myself out there and in the hopes of something permanent in the industry. So I'm trying to think the timelines like I was doing, so this would have been around 2021, um, around 2021, 2022, and I was doing the odd bit of modeling here with my agency. Um, I was doing the odd bit of Instagram, but for the most part, I wasn't really working. And I remember my brother giving me this book called The Secret. You've probably heard of it, but that is when I learned all about manifesting, and like whenever I was having because there's there were some days that were really just kind of like just kind of gray, just some gray days where I was kind of like, have I have I made a big mistake in in leaving the job? Because nothing came immediately after. Um, so I would lean on that book a lot. Like it's it's not a book that you kind of would read continuously, it's like you kind of go back to it, make your notes and go back to the book. So I remember using that and leaning on that book a lot, learning about manifesting. This is when I first discovered Roxy Nafusi and all on Instagram, and and also like just having moments in my box room, just really thinking and praying and manifesting and just hoping, okay, an opportunity is gonna come through the door. I just need to keep remaining positive, I need to keep being optimistic, I just need to be grateful for like whatever little situation I have right now, even if I'm only working one day this week or two days this week. Um, so I'd say it was a year until I got um until yeah, it was a year and then I was asked to be a contributor on Ireland AM about Love Island and about um pop culture. So I'd come in maybe once a week or once every other week for just five minutes of uh screen time, and but I made sure okay, I'm gonna be the most prepared for those five minutes. Every five minutes is like my audition to hopefully be like a permanent presenter here. So I just did it and I had fun every single time. It was uh I was on Ireland AM with Weirin Tommy and Alan Hughes, and then it was October of 2022, and I got a phone call from my agent saying that um the exec producer wants you to fill in from Weirin when she's on holidays, and this was three days of a full live television show, and Ireland AM is three hours long, so like that is some amount of like TV stamina that you need to have. I had no experience from for doing uh I had no experience of a live show whatsoever. So I think I came in for two days of training and they gave me the running order, and I like I had my highlighter, I had my pens ready, I was treating that as like a school book. I was making all my little notes down, trying to understand the breakdown of the show as much as possible, so it wouldn't be as daunting for me. But trust me, it was so daunting. Um, I kicked off the show, I was with Tommy Bow and Alan Hughes, and I I did that for three days, and it was just the most incredible experience. And I think the reception of that was so positive because I had been kind of documenting the journey on my social media. A lot of people knew I was out of I was out of a job, I was just doing bits and bobs here. I'd won the competition, so they were kind of along for the ride, and they were kind of like, okay, what are you gonna do next? It'll be anything. So I remember when I shared um the three days of doing Ireland AM, like the reception was so positive, and people were so happy for me, and it really gave me the spirit to keep on going. Um, and I was I was happy with that. But then a month or two passed, and that's when I got the call to be on the new weekend lineup um for Ireland AM. And honestly, like that that's when I could I could leave my job then because I was double jamming it at the time when I was working as a contributor. I I got this job as a social media manager for uh a children's labeling company. Okay, so I would. I would be on a meeting um doing the like whatever goals of the week for the social media manager. And then at 10 a.m. I would be wrapping up on Ireland M and I just tell them, Oh, I'm I'm just gonna be um away from my desk for about an hour, but I'd be in Virgin Media doing what I needed to do, and then I'd be locked on the laptop. But they had no idea because they were over in the UK, so I was very lucky they weren't watching Irish television. Um, so yeah, getting that call to do the weekend gig with Elaine Crowley and Martin King, that's when I could leave my job. That's when I had a bit of stability again in my life, financial stability too. Um, and yeah, it just it just went up from there. And so I was I was super, super grateful to get that opportunity.

SPEAKER_02 44:43

How did you celebrate the win? Because that's a very big win to get a stable presenting job, you know, with with within a few years of setting foot in the industry, you know, it's kind of unheard of, really. Like, not yeah, how many people get to have that experience? And you know, you did. Were you aware of like obviously all your hard work was paying off, but also you were in a you know, you were lucky, like it all worked out, yeah. Um, because it's a lot of guarantees. Well, a lot of work and a lot of hard work and you know, a lot of manifestation and a lot of like hoping and wishing behind the scenes, too. But how did it feel in the moment and how did you celebrate? Because that's definitely something that deserves to be celebrated.

Landing Ireland AM Weekend gig

SPEAKER_00 45:25

Yeah, like in the moment, it just felt like all of my prayers had been answered. Like every day that I kind of like thought you made the wrong decision, all the days that I felt like giving up, it felt like they all they were all worth it. Um, and just me keeping on was working out in some way in the universe, and this job had come to me. And I was actually in Germany at the time, so I happened to be with my family. Um, so when I got the call, like we were celebrating. I think getting to be with them was the best because they had seen the struggle of you know, hating the banking job and crying every day and being overworked and then not having a job and figuring it out and then trying this competition and trying that. And they were supportive all along the way. I don't know if my parents knew anything were gonna come from it, but they were just like, Look, we've got your back, keep going. Um, so I think it was special that I was with them in that moment and they were just thrilled for me. So we were jumped, I think I jumped on the bed. Like the first time when I got the phone call, I went back to my hotel room and I think I jumped on the bed. So that's how I celebrated.

SPEAKER_02 46:30

And those high days that you mentioned, like, did you have an outlet or someone that you could vent to and talk about it? Like, I know people sometimes do therapy, maybe journaling is a helpful tool. It sounds like you had a really or have a really great relationship with your mom and dad where you can talk to them about anything. Like, who or what was the tool or the person that you turned to when you were having those hard moments of like, what did I do? Is this going to work? It's an awful lot of time now, of like, you know, in between. How did who did you talk to?

Journaling & manifestation

SPEAKER_00 47:04

Um, I'm gonna say what, and it was my journal. Like, I literally wrote into my journal, like just thoughts, scribbles, everything. Um, I would I would talk to my parents, but like, you know, when when you get the feeling of being like of feeling deeply stuck and unhappy, like I I also think I you don't want to tell your parents that, or maybe that's just me because you don't want them to get worried about you. But um, I had my journal, me and my journal were like besties, and it's funny because I still have the same journal from those struggle years. And sometimes even now, I look back at those pages and I'm like, okay, you got yourself out of that rut, and like you've come a long way. And it's just nice to look back on that as a reminder. But journaling was a big help for me. Listening to podcasts as well, about you know, even like podcasts like this, like talking about the journey of people and staying optimistic, like they were really important for me and um and and manifesting, like they were all of the tools that I used because it is um it's a slippery slope. Like it's it's you know, when you when you feel despair, when you feel like okay, I don't know where my career is going. I'm in my early 20s, I'm seeing people in like my peers kind of slowly climb their career ladders, but now I've picked the unstable route. I'm in a creative TV industry that is is not as stable as people would think. I'm also self-employed now. So it's it was all of these new things that I was learning and that I was questioning myself about. So I think as well in a world of comparison on social media, on Instagram, and just seeing everyone get these crazy opportunities, which is amazing, and I'd be happy for them. But at the same time, you can't help but compare your situation with other people's situations. So um, yeah, I think journaling and your internal dialogue and working on that, like that really, really helped me.

SPEAKER_02 48:56

Yeah, I can totally relate to that as well, because the comparison thing, especially on social media, because you know, like my my TV chapter was five years in RTE, and then our show went off air, and I decided, and I at the time I I was you know getting lots of opportunities. It helped that I suppose I had a different flavor, as you said, you know, at the beginning, like I had a different surname. I had yeah, I was bringing a little bit of a different flavor and culture to RTE and stuff. So there were plenty of opportunities, but at the same time, because I was working in children's TV, a lot of things were out of bounds as well, because it was a natural broadcaster as well. Um, so after a while, like people were used to oh like she's not allowed to do those things. So as I was getting older, maybe I think I was 25 when the show wrapped up. I was like trying to pitch myself. I was like, I want to make documentaries, and I had I'd made some documentaries for young audiences, but I was trying really hard to knock on that door and be like, I'm an adult, like I'm not just like nice, you know, because they were like, but you're so nice and you need a bit of grit. And I'm like, I host a show for seven to seven years old. I can hardly be lining on screens, but trust me, I have like grit. Yeah, I've got that. Yeah, there's so much more to me. And I really felt like to be in a position where I would be taken seriously, I had to leave. I was like, I'll just move to London. Well, yeah, just moving to London sounds like a good idea, but the reality is so different. And you might be bringing your experience from Ireland, but it's like a much bigger pool of talents over there. And this was 2015 when you know reality TV stars were just taking over the airwaves, and every talent agent I met, they were like, You have so much talent, you have a lot to give, you have so much experience, but you're not gonna get the job because so-and-so has so many followers and they've just come out of Love Island, or they've just done Big Brother or blah blah blah. And I just remember being like, What have I done? I've just done it. And I actually had to delete my social media because it was not helping me. Like, like you, like I felt so happy for everybody, but I was feeling so stuck in my head of like, how am I gonna make this work? And even though I'm getting opportunities to screen test, as I said, it was the people with like lots of following online at the time that were getting them who had done these reality TV shows and had the platform. And um yeah, social media was not a nice place for my head, but I really think those chapters of struggle where you might feel like you have failed where things aren't easy are really, really, really important because that's where you learned you know, massive lessons you learn resilient, you know, you learn to have an appreciation really for when the moments where things are working out are happening. And yeah, I think although it was hard at the time, I wouldn't change it because I think it was really necessary. I mean it made you who you are right like today. Exactly. Like if it was it was if it was easy, it wouldn't be as enjoyable really at the end of the day.

Turning off online noise

Overcoming imposter syndrome

SPEAKER_00 52:07

Exactly. Like I think uh and it's it's it is so it's a competitive world, and you do realize that you know, people who have a bigger name on social media, like it's almost like they have more currency, uh, like in the world of auditioning and and going for gigs and you know screen testing and stuff. So it's it's a it's a tricky one to navigate, and you almost have to you almost have to tell yourself like I I am good enough for myself. Like, and it that might take giving yourself a break off social media. And I know I've done the same where I've turned I turn off my notifications, I do not have my notifications on on Instagram. When I post something, I still have so much anxiety being like, oh, this person would get like thousands of likes in a minute, and like I'm I'm here like struggling with my however many likes, like I can't look, I can't look. So it's it was so important for me to do all of that, and like that is self-care in a way, like you removing yourself from Instagram. For me, I do the same with turning off notifications, or maybe on the weekends, like I strictly do not go on social media, or if I'm feeling a type of way, I make sure I avoid TikTok comments and stuff like that. Because no matter what, and and even like my early days, like I I struggled with imposter syndrome when I got the gig on Ireland AM because a lot of people were saying, Oh, you're just a diversity hire, oh, you were only hired because you're black, oh you have no talent, da da da. So I would get a lot of those comments, and I think because the rise felt kind of meteoric in a way, like it was quick. Um I I questioned myself a lot at the beginning, and it I think I only came out of it from talking to my peers, like like for example, Brian Darling. It is he's not only my co-host, but he's someone that I really look up to, and I get some great advice off him because he has lived a life. Um and he was like, they might say this, like, oh, you're a diversity art, but to be honest, not many people can do the job you can do. And you'll know this, like going on live TV, reading auto queue, being able to sense your your surroundings, or if you need to change something in a matter of seconds, uh being able to have compassion for someone that you're interviewing, being able to carry a show for that long and and do your research and everything, like that does take skill. And like it wasn't until he said that I was like, no, I am actually putting myself at work here, and I'm not just a face, just to show on camera. So I I I still go through those moments of imposter syndrome or needing to avoid social media comments, um, because it's just we can't escape it, it's kind of everywhere, to be honest. It's all about having the tools to to work through it.

Creating your own opportunities

SPEAKER_02 54:57

And yeah, I mean, you do an incredible job on screen, so it's it's sad to hear that uh maybe narrow-mindedness or people's narrow-mindedness could have such an impact on your confidence and you know, assurance and certainty in who you are? Because yeah, as you say, it takes a lot to be able to handle that situation. And if those keyboard warriors were in that situation, they fumble. Probably 5% will be able to handle, you know, the the environment of the live studio and keep going. Um, just on the on the career chapter, is there anything that like what's the most unhinged thing you did to try and get an opportunity? Um I remember being in New York to see my friend, and I was like, I'm gonna go to today to the today show and drop in my tutorial and CV. Like as installed. They were ever going to look at that. And you know what? I didn't get past reception. Like, I did not. They were like, no. I love the energy. Like, I'm just gonna do it. I'm just gonna do it. I think in my head, I was like, the movies, you know, I'm just gonna walk in, I'm gonna get past the barrier, I'll get upstairs, I'll show them what I've got and be like, don't you want a bit of this? It's not reality people. Have you ever done anything a little bit unhinged like that?

SPEAKER_00 56:21

Oh, unhinged? I don't know, but I know I was um I was invited to an event for like Instagram, like my Instagram personality was invited to this uh event. It was like a a show in Belfast. Uh it was share the musical, and I didn't tell the pure rep that brought me down that I wanted to film for my potential show reel because I wasn't in telly yet. But I brought my best friend as a plus one and I go, I go to her, like, okay, when we get a moment, I'm gonna get out the the ringed light. And I have I had my like Sony camera with me, and I had mics and stuff. And I'm like, when we get a second, let's just try to see if we can pull like the actors on stage and uh and do like a really quick interview, and um yeah, it was kind of a quiet moment, and we had we had like an on stage tour like before the show began, and I saw like one or two of them, and I just pulled them and I just I was like, Annabelle, go! And she had the lighting on and the camera was switched on, and I just like did an interview, like it wasn't it probably wasn't a great interview, but it was material for my showreel. So I was like, uh like by any by any means, like I'm just gonna make sure I get material for showreel, whether it was interviewing randomers on the street or again making like opportunity out of like an Instagram invite. Like, I was gonna do it, so I'd say that, but not as crazy as going to New York and going into the today's show office and dropping in a show reel. That's pretty iconic.

SPEAKER_02 57:46

I was already in New York, you see, so it doesn't make sense. I'm like gonna utilize this time, but I love that. I love that you're like, okay, I have an opportunity, I am gonna get my material. Yeah, doesn't matter. I'll find a way. Good or bad. Good or bad. It's extremely cute. Um what is the dream for the future? What is the end goal? I'm sure the I'm sure the you know the angle is changing all the time because different opportunities appear all the time. But what would be the dream for you?

The ultimate dream

SPEAKER_00 58:19

I suppose the dream would be to have longevity. Like I always say this, but it is it is a fickle industry in the sense that you know you get hired on contract, like you never know how many years you're gonna remain in a place, and there can always be a looming sense of worry. Like, is this my last year? Do I have another few years here? But I really want to create longevity for myself in TV and and radio world. I only started doing radio a few months ago. Um, and it's something I've been really enjoying and something that I would really love to keep on doing and and keep on exploring. Um, and I guess suppose like outside of that, exploring other avenues, uh other ventures now that you know social media has become such an incredible tool and something that I really enjoy kind of creating and connecting with an audience, like people that are similar to me, people that feel like they're on the same journey as me in terms of confidence and uh body confidence and just journey of hard work and sacrifice, like a lot of people that relate to my story in different ways. So kind of creating and building that community further and just growing in confidence in myself, to be honest. But yeah, overall the end goal would just be to have longevity and hopefully be around here for um a little a little longer just to just to keep. I suppose I I I would get a lot of lovely messages from young girls and um just them asking, like, oh, I never thought like TV was was for me, but you know, after seeing you on screen, it's definitely something I want to try out. Like, what is your advice? So it's just cool that you know we can build a better representation in Ireland now by having more diverse voices and experiences on air. Um, so by being around that much longer, I think it can make even more change and be positive for people. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:18

How does it feel knowing you are such a big role model for so many young girls and guys? And uh, do you feel pressure on your shoulders that you know whatever move you make, you have to bear in mind that you know there's a whole legion of younger people who are looking up to you, and you not that you want to do it right, but you want to do it with purpose so that they can take something away from it as well.

Being a role model & a figure of representation

SPEAKER_00 1:00:43

Yeah, like you you do feel pressure at times because you want to be a good example, but then you also just want to live life and make make mistakes that you might make on air and and or or off air. Um, but I think uh it's it's more so the pressure to continue to be a voice on on TV because I'm aware that I'm the only black TV presenter, black Irish TV presenter. If I go, there's no one else, at least right now. Um, so for young kids watching, like I feel like if if if I'm not on air, like who else is their example to see that they can possibly step into my shoes and take that route if that's something they want to see, or even to have pure representation? Because I know when I was younger there was no representation on TV. So then you do look at yourself as like, oh, I'm I must be, yeah, I'm like the odd one out here, or like my beauty standards are totally different to the beauty standards I'm seeing on screen. So representation is so important. So there's pressure to continue being that kind of um the figure of representation in a way, but then also pressure to just continue being a good example and um I don't know, just just keep saying doing the right thing. But again, I'm human, anything can happen. So I try not to think about that that too much. But I think when I look at my goals and I just think of having longevity, I think that's enough for me.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:12

Yeah, and I feel like you're not exactly an outrageous person anyway. Like you're not going out there making you know outrageous statements left, right, and center, and just being unhinged. So I feel like I think you don't need to worry too much that you're gonna say something that will set the world on fire um at any point. But you don't know, you might go wrong, catch up. Yeah, hopefully not, hopefully not. Um, if you could give advice to your younger self who was trying to figure things out, maybe who was feeling insecure in her skin, um unsure of yeah, what things were gonna come her way, what advice would you give to her, um, knowing what you know now?

Katja's advice to her younger self

SPEAKER_00 1:02:54

I would say if I could talk to like my 16, 17-year-old self, I would number one tell her to not not compare yourself to other people because she I was a very insecure teenager in terms of looking at my body shape and you know the way I looked, the way I applied my makeup, everything there was insecurities in everything that I did. I would tell her just not to care so much, you're gonna grow into yourself, and I would also say that you're gonna figure it out in terms of career, no matter what, you'll figure it out, and even if you make a mistake, you're still young enough to change your mind and still gain success in any industry you choose to be in. So, yeah, that's what I'd say to my younger self.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:42

Did your insecurities ever get in the way of you um chasing career things or accepting career opportunities? Just when you said that, it reminded me of so many things that I would have maybe have wanted to do, but I said no to because I was too insecure.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:00

I think not in not in terms of television, but in terms of modeling, because I did dabble into modeling a little bit before I worked on TV, and there were opportunities that would have come, whether it was you know, a particular shoot with lingerie or swimsuit, or maybe it was like a more active shoot, like I would be so insecure in my body that I would turn it down and I'd say no. And like even at times where I did a photo shoot for I think it was done stories, and I was like, I really hated how I looked at that moment, and I just couldn't look at the photos. But then I was getting messages from people saying how amazing it is to see someone with like a curvier body on like a billboard in Stevens Green. And I just like for ages I couldn't like look at the photo, but then after getting so many nice messages, I I just went to town to see it and looked at it with a different lens and was like, it's not actually that bad that get out of your head sometimes because I would have said no to more shoots like that because of how badly I was feeling in my body. So I think it also comes with age. The older you get, the more you accept yourself, and the more confidence you have, you kind of care less about what people think. Um, and I think I don't know if this is a positive or not, but I'm now beginning to become immune to negative comments on social media because I get them so much that I'm like, it is so easy to press the block button. And that is just my reply. I don't even reply anymore, I just press block. So I'm creating and curating my own community. Um so I'm just trying to focus on the positive and and try to not like lean into insecurities because yeah, again, like when we were both younger, you'd you'd shut opportunities down and you'd block you block your blessings in a way. But now with being older and with a different lens, I think I can comfortably say like I'm I I try. to do just about everything now and um talk myself into doing things that scare me even more now.

Feel the fear and do it anyway

SPEAKER_02 1:06:07

Yeah and I think that is just a beautiful way of going forward and a gorgeous mentality to have. Like you almost I almost want to embrace that thing of like the hero saying yes just saying yes to everything. Yes. I I love that concept and and I wish that I had done that back then. But look hindsight is a beautiful thing and the thing is I can apply apply that going forward which is amazing. Before we wrap things up I do want to do a little quick fire round but before that um what advice do you have for anyone who might be feeling lost stuck just unsure maybe they're sitting on a dream and they want to pursue it but they're too afraid um what do you have to say to someone in that scenario I would say the two things that help me I would say feel the fear and do it anyway.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:00

It is such a powerful statement to repeat in your mind because you've got to tell yourself what is the worst thing that can happen. And then when you confront yourself with the worst thing it's actually not that bad. I would say that feel the fear and do it anyway and it's okay to fail. And a lot of times if we try something and it doesn't work out we get back up on our feet and then we move on. It's just what we do as humans it's in our nature and so so do the thing that scares you because life is too short. So there you go feel the fear and do it anyway.

Quickfire questions

SPEAKER_02 1:07:31

Yes girl feel feel that fear and do it anyway I love it. Okay uh whatever comes into your head for the quick fire um quick fire round what is the first thing you do when you wake up gratitude practice gratitude I've gratitude journal next to me I read three things that I'm grateful for and three things that I'm looking forward to doing today. Who is your dream dinner guest alive or dead?

SPEAKER_00 1:07:53

Oh Beyonce Giselle Knowles uh what's the last book you read? I'm reading Akatar at the moment so A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Mas I haven't read that one yet but I don't know have you is fantasy like a genre that you're into because I I haven't dabbled in fantasy yet do you know what I didn't think it it was but my sister and my best friend are both reading it and it's very steamy and fun so I'm kind of loving and loving that element it's like a different world but it's very steamy you'd love it.

Next week's guest...

SPEAKER_02 1:08:25

What is your comfort TV show? The Real Housewives Any City is there one thing that you just can't live without chocolate biscuits anything chocolates for me what song do you have on repeat right now oh I have oh die on this hill by Siena Spiro love that song so much um and then what is the one beauty product you will always buy on repeat oh um okay the Laneige waterbank cream I'm obsessed with that or the Fenty beauty um butterbank the the Tatcha um the purple moisturizer also have you ever tried that if I could afford to buy that every time I I run out I would absolutely I haven't tried the Lanez yet or the Fenty it's so so similar to it I think you would love it the Lanez waterbank obsessed it's like 35 euros still pricey but I'm like I could I could squeeze enough things for that to have it in my life okay it's going on my list and then your favorite brunch spot um in Dublin or wherever ooh favorite brunch spot I I love the pepper pot in Paris Quart Center um and I love and I I love going to is it Riley's yeah Riley's rooftop as well near the Mason hotel but pepper pot is such a cute spot it's really cozy again I actually haven't been I see it on socials all the time people eating delicious stuff and I've never been there I must go yeah yeah you put in the pepper pot on my list and the water bank from the Lanez yes from the Lanez perfect um Katya thank you so much it's uh it's been incredible to chat to you I feel like we've gone on a big journey meandering into all sorts of topics I know I feel like I was waffling a lot but it was so so nice to chat to you Diana I really really enjoy the conversation thanks for having me I wouldn't count it as waffle it's it's life experience and beautiful lessons and uh yeah just so nice to actually have the opportunity to sit down and chat because it's so rare that you do get like an hour of someone's time so I'm very very very grateful that you made that time for me and this podcast which is new so you obviously don't know didn't have anything to look back on so I hope that um that you enjoy the experience. It's a fun chat and I I can't wait to see you come to life congrats on everything by the way now what did I tell you isn't Katya just the most gorgeous gorgeous person and I hope her story highlights that when you back yourself and champion yourself beautiful things can happen. I really hope you enjoy this conversation I have another incredible guest lined up for you next week this time it's an international best selling author one that I have loved and read myself for many many years. I can't wait for you to meet her. See you then