We Started Talking About NASA… Then EVERYTHING Fell Apart

One minute we’re discussing the moon landing… the next minute we’re talking about aliens, Kung Fu Panda, Harvard dreams, EpiPens, Disney trips, and conspiracy theories about literally everything.

Typical Hair First Podcast behavior 🤷‍♀️

In this episode:

•  NASA & moon landing theories 
•  Viral TikTok conspiracy culture 
•  Big Pharma & natural health discussions 
•  Could there be life beyond Earth? 
•  Monica’s daughter steals the spotlight in Mean Girls 
•  Tessa’s legendary flying anxiety stories 
•  The Beard officially joins the madness 

Grab a drink and come hang out with us for another completely unhinged episode.

⚠️ Explicit content and language.

#HairFirstPodcast #ComedyPodcast #ConspiracyTheory #Aliens #MoonLanding

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Hey, hey, hey, gorgeous people. Welcome to the Hair at First Podcast where Great Hair meets real life. We're your host, Tessa, Monica, and a child. Freestylus, moms, besties. We're keeping it real about beauty, business, and the chaos of motherhood.

SPEAKER_04 0:19

We're here to share stories, left way too loud, and maybe stole a little shampoo along the way. Just a quick heads up. We're not making any medical claims or giving professional advice here, just sharing our own thoughts, opinions, and experiences.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

So grab your coffee, your favorite blanket, and let's hair it first.

SPEAKER_03 0:40

Hello, and welcome back to the Hair It First podcast. If you're joining us for the first time, thank you for being here. And I hope you enjoy the wild ride that you are on. If you are a returning um listener, thank you so much for following us. And please like and subscribe and share with your friends. Uh, we are already giggling because uh when we push the button for it, it gives a five-second countdown. I don't even remember what was said, but uh it had a few naughty giggling. And so sorry that our opening was a little bit uh yeah, that's who that's who we are. We are rated explicit, we have found that out. So um we don't apologize, but today there is zero apology for our behavior today. Our editor, Kylie, thank you, Kylie, for everything that you do, even though we've given instructions that we really don't want our horribleness to be edited out. There are some things that I know he's like, uh, we're gonna probably edit it out. So we love you, Kylie, and thank you so much. Today we have back. We have had um the beard, aka my husband, um, on one of our previous episodes, and he is back with us today. He had shoulder surgery, so he is home um for entirely too long. And so um, I said, you better be slinging some shampoo, boy. You are the firm of bitch from here until you go back. But so he's gonna join us on some podcasts. We're excited. We are going to have a podcast coming up where we're gonna have all three of our husbands on here. And it's ours.

SPEAKER_01 2:30

It'll be interesting. It'll be our trick.

SPEAKER_03 2:32

May the odds be ever in your favor. That's all I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 2:36

Maybe we let that run with all three of us on here.

SPEAKER_03 2:39

Oh my god, we should totally let them run. Let them run it. Yeah, we'll sit behind that. Let them run it. You guys talk about whatever you want to talk about. Listen, we only run one way, we don't back it up and do it a couple times. We just it's just like let's speak sure we get it done the right way the first time. You know, yeah. So we ain't got time to be back to the world. Oh my gosh. But yeah, so today we would love to cover something that we left off a few weeks back. Um, but we squirrel and we forget sometimes what we're talking about or what we're doing. But we talked about at the very end of one of our episodes on the conspiracy theory of whether we landed on the moon or not. So we kind of want to talk about that today and um add a little more into that. Uh yes. So, and it's gonna be great to have the beard here to hear his because I know a lot of things that I say in conspiracy theories that I believe stop with your face like that back there. That he's like, all right, you're crazy. You're just crazy. What are you even thinking? Like Gerald the Dolphin.

SPEAKER_01 4:00

I was just getting ready to say Gerald. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 4:03

Oh my gosh, we did talk about that one.

SPEAKER_02 4:05

But if we're gonna talk about NASA, you sent us a Instagram reel.

SPEAKER_03 4:12

And I'm gonna shout her out, Rebecca Ann on Instagram. It is the funniest thing I've ever heard. And she starts out and she's like, I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but and basically goes into an entire rampage about how if we can talk to somebody FaceTime on the moon or 300 million or thousand, however many miles away it is, but she drops a call at the Dollar Gentral because it's a metal building, and you can FaceTime us, but you can't take pictures. And she was so funny, she was like, Yeah, because you know, technology is not advanced enough since 1960 for us to take a picture. So it was hilarious. Yes, and she sort of so yeah, you can't clip clip your coupons, your coupons in the Dollar Gentral because you're you have no access internet or or service or anything, but on the moon. Yeah. Well, I don't think NASA is using the T Mobile car.

SPEAKER_01 5:29

And I don't think NASA's using the T-Mobile carrier, you know. They might have a little bit better services, possibly.

SPEAKER_03 5:36

Yeah, but nobody opened it like it. They can take a picture or turn the FaceTime around. Exactly. You just proved the whole point right there. You yeah. And okay, so say they did go to I think they went to outer space. I do not believe they went as far as they said they were gonna go. But my whole question in all of it is like, why can't you give us more information? Like, why can't we see pictures? Like, that doesn't make any sense to me. Like, and why do we have to go what six more times up there before we can land on the moon? Like, what like why? But if we did it whenever I don't even know when we landed on the moon, landed on the moon. I said 20 years. Um, why could we do it then, but we can't just do it now? Yeah, do you know what I mean? Like, why do we have to go up there so many times? Like, it is billions of dollars. Yeah, I don't know about y'all, but rather than billions of dollars to go up in space, how about we not have gas beat five dollars a gallon? Feed the veterans or the homeless, yeah. Like, I mean what's just your inner people.

SPEAKER_01 6:52

How many times? And none of you can say you've never done it. You're at that super important event with your child or your grandkid, and you're like, Oh my gosh, I'm gonna get this on on film, I'm gonna video this, and then you get all excited, and the next day you go to your friend, you're like, Look what I videoed. Shit, I never hit start, and you didn't get the video. You didn't get the picture. Maybe they did that.

SPEAKER_03 7:13

Shut the Adam, no, you're gonna be kicked off this podcast. Kidding me, because that don't even make good damn sense. And you know as well as I do, even if you can't don't get service in somewhere, you your camera still works, you could take a picture. They were FaceTiming, yes, if their face turn it around, but the only time that inherently didn't work was when they went around the lunar backside pole thing, like dark side or whatever.

SPEAKER_04 7:46

And this is my thought process, too. There's so many billionaires, not so many, but there's enough billionaires in the world that have egos the size of the moon. If you could go to the moon, they would have rented a bus, aka rocket ship, and would have been there taking pictures. You can't tell me they wouldn't.

SPEAKER_03 8:09

Yes, actually, that happened like they what was that three or four years ago? Our friend, um, Doug that helped build the the machine with R Richard Richard Branson?

SPEAKER_01 8:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:22

Um, he they built this whatever spaceship thingy that these billionaires could pay. Do you remember how much it was for a seat?

SPEAKER_01 8:32

400,000 or more or something like that.

SPEAKER_03 8:34

And it only housed, I don't remember how many of them.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

Eight.

SPEAKER_03 8:38

And then they took them to space and flew them around space in it and brought them back down. So if we could go to the moon, you are so correct. These billionaires, trillionaires would definitely have paid to do that to have gone farther than that. So, yeah, yeah, we actually have a friend that helped build that. Listen, I'll be the first one to admit I am a conspiracy theorist. I am too. 100% I am a hundred percent. I for a very long time tried to say, like, I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but I am just just like this new virus that's out. Oh my god. Are we for real right now? Are we really gonna do this again? I'm not doing it, I am not participating. I am not participating. I identify as not participating.

SPEAKER_04 9:28

I didn't get the other one. I'm not I'm not wearing them.

SPEAKER_03 9:33

So, like, that's the thing that bothers me about all of it. The scare tactics drive me insane. Like, people are so quick to just believe whatever they're told, and I don't operate that way. Like, I want to know why. Okay, why should I believe it? Yes, give me some detail, give me some detail and give me some hard evidence. I don't need to hear that your second cousin's brother's sister's nephew heard about it, like, and I just find it all super convenient, like everything is a convenience thing. Yep, you know, just like I don't believe that they don't have a cure for cancer. I don't believe that there is a cure for cancer, but you know what's cool is people are finally instead of doing these taking these meds, doing these different treatments, they're going about it naturally. More and more people are are working toward that. So I think eventually, if everybody worked together, we won't see it in our lifetime, I don't think, but big pharma won't be because people are turning back to even homesteading all those things and going the natural routes, and they're gonna to make their money next, whenever nobody's doing paying for all that crap, they're gonna have to let that cured cancer out because then people are gonna pay for it. You know what I mean? Yeah, well, and it's just like you know, uh I've I've listened to this book is called Good Energy or Clean Energy or whatever by Dr. Callie Means and her Casey, I don't know, Casey means Callie means whatever. But she says you trust you, you should only try and she's a doctor, you should only trust doctors for acute conditions. So, like an acute something, you break an arm, you have a an infection, something like that. Anything long term or a chronic illness, don't trust your doctor. She said, When we go through medical school, we're told to push prescriptions, push a quick fix, not figure out what the root cause of an issue is. Like, why does that person have sinusitis seven times? What is the reasoning? But that's not ever what we're taught. We're taught as surgeons to cut and as doctors to prescribe. Wow. But you're not figuring out what the issue is. You know, naturopathic doctors and uh acupuncturists and um chiropractors, things like that, they don't have the ability to write a prescription. So they really want to get to why you are the way that you are. And I that I feel like big pharma is a can it is a giant conspiracy theory. They make more money when you're sick, and that's the reality.

SPEAKER_05 12:29

Yeah. Well, absolutely.

SPEAKER_04 12:31

Well, that was my post the other day. I cannot believe I it did not get more comments because think about this like European countries, right? So the government pays for healthcare, which is why their standards of ingredients are so much higher because they want their people healthy. In the United States, they don't big pharma, and we know it's all the people at the top that are all involved, they don't make money unless we're sick. So, why do they want to take the bad stuff out of our food, out of our cosmetics, out of our hair? They don't, they don't because they want us sick. I'm sorry, you guys can call me.

SPEAKER_03 13:08

You're not crazy at all. You are right on the mug. Well, that yeah, and the FDA won't approve certain things. Well, why won't you approve? Like, it is something that is coming out of the ground, like it is in a natural state. You mean to tell me that that is worse? Like, like I just I just can't understand it. And I am a person that like I have to understand something, and it's not me trying to be any like type of way, it's me like I need to understand it. I want to understand it, it needs to make sense to me. And uh, I just can't make things make sense. That's like if somebody asked me, like, is this FDA approved?

SPEAKER_04 13:56

I'm like, I would rather use something that's not FDA approved.

SPEAKER_03 14:00

Yeah, no, can we are we are already approved, we are already passed um for European standards, and something more we'll talk about at a later date is how far we went with that and how clean we really are that we are passed by um these different um, what do you call those? Like the AAMI and stuff, different um standards. Uh just amazing because we're not we're not no longer following along with this bull crap and these nasty FDA standards. We are are going above and above beyond two European standards. We everybody has to, we gotta take a stand somewhere, you know. We gotta take a stand. When I say and that's the thing, I feel like when people start taking more of a stand, like I'm not doing this, things are gonna have to change.

SPEAKER_01 14:55

Like they're gonna have to. Monica, you kind of touched on something there too when you said you're the type of person that has to know the why and more about it. The problem with the world nowadays, and I'll use TikTok, everyone, that's where they get all the information is if it's said on TikTok, it's true. Nobody actually digs into why this person said that or is it true? And that's where all these conspiracy theories come from. If you believe them or you don't, I could go on TikTok today and make up the craziest thing in the world. You know, I can say, you know, oh my god, my grandfather was electropon, and that's where he got all of his riches from. And that's gonna be a conspiracy theory.

SPEAKER_03 15:34

Yes, let's test that out. We will get just started. We will give you an update on here in future uh episodes on the shit that Adam starts on TikTok today.

SPEAKER_01 15:46

But I love it too, though. I do love it that all my boys and stuff, they're interested in what's going on today. And luckily, our boys they do dig deeper and and learn for themselves when they read those. So I I compliment this generation for trying to keep up to date on things that are going on. But where my problem is is the almighty social, the almighty TikTok. Whatever it says, that's truth, and that's what's killing everybody.

SPEAKER_04 16:15

Is there's no it's killing my business too. I was gonna say it's killing our business.

SPEAKER_03 16:20

A zillion person in on that. It has wrecked our career, and and I think it's just gonna keep wrecking our career.

SPEAKER_01 16:28

But this one here, though, I can't tell you how many times we'll be sitting on the couch and she'll be like, Have you heard? and says this, and I go, Where'd you hear that on TikTok? And she goes, No.

SPEAKER_03 16:40

Okay, I'm part of the generation that still believes everything that you read, for instance, and Gerald and all of that. But I also feel like us three, and I will we'll ask Adam really what he thinks in a minute. I think we're a large our the way we think is how a majority of the people think as far as the moon landing. I don't think, and I think people are really waking up to that and going, There's no freaking way. You know, there's no freaking way we did it then.

SPEAKER_01 17:12

And and you know, and last night, what were we talking about that with the Milky Way and the about how large the universe is and how we're just one of many universes, and you asked, Do you think there's life out there besides our planet?

SPEAKER_03 17:26

Yeah, so we don't know because okay, we can't get there. We can't get out of the the Milky Way, right? We can't get past and we can't get to wherever. Well, why can't we? B well if NASA's so cool, why can't we? And B. Um, do you guys think that there's other life out there on other universes?

SPEAKER_04 17:55

Yes, I do 100%. There's no way there's not. I think we're all experiments, like I really do. For like, and people can call it heaven, people can call it, you know, whatever they want. I don't know if it's necessarily heaven because I think that's like when we all die, like I believe in heaven, but I feel like the next um I'm gonna sound so freaking weird. The next population of whatever, you know what I mean? This is where he's God has figured out what works the best, right? I mean, think about how many I'm gonna go so deep. You guys are gonna think I'm enough. He takes all the good people, right? The good people die early, most of them. Why is that?

SPEAKER_03 18:51

Well, I have a theory on that because evil doesn't fucking die. Evil doesn't die. Yep, it would just make too much sense. Yeah, yep. And I kind of look at it my mom has a theory, evil doesn't die, and you can't cure stupid. So correct.

SPEAKER_01 19:11

But I look at that, you know, I go a lot by what the Bible says. And I my grandpa was a pastor, and I really miss that he's not here because he's one of those when I had this question, you know, are there is there life out beyond us? And he would always have the best biblical answer, you know, and to me, with my faith, that's usually what I will take. But then I think about okay, if we're one planet in this one universe in this galaxy, why would God create such a vast universe of all these other planets and have one singletary planet, the only one life's on. So I don't know. I tend to believe there's possibly life other places, but I don't know. That's just my thought.

SPEAKER_04 19:55

So human life. You know, they have you've watched Men of Black, right? This is the thing with movies. This is the thing with movies. I feel that they are a lot of them that we think is so crazy. I think they're partially true. I really do. There's some place where they have aliens that they're stunning. Oh, really 100%. Look at the Simpsons. I I just I truly believe that.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

That's exactly what I was gonna say. Look at the Simpsons, look how many things the Simpsons have predicted. They predicted Charlie Kirk, they predicted the presidencies, they've they've predicted an unbelievable amount of things. You can't tell me. They predicted COVID. Yep, yeah. There was a movie too, yes, that predicted it, talking about the world shutting down for months. I remember it came out like a month after COVID hit and shut down, and we're like, this is really what was it called?

SPEAKER_01 21:01

Outbreak, I think they pulled it or something. They're like, now it's too soon to put this out.

SPEAKER_03 21:05

So everybody's seen it because what what the hell else were you doing? You were at home. I remember so many people talking about that, like, oh my god. And you know, they had to film this a long time ago to get it out, right? So, yeah, it it's so scary and so crazy that we have no literal, literal control over our lives.

SPEAKER_01 21:28

It's basically what I'm pretty sure with my favorite movie, I know there is a panda out there that knows kung fu and that can kick everybody's ass and see the world.

SPEAKER_03 21:39

It really is his favorite. Why why would Kung Fu panda be your favorite?

SPEAKER_01 21:45

I've watched them all multiple times. I love because he's big, kind of chubby, funny, and can kick ass. I mean, that's my dream right there. I've got three fourths of that the chubbiness and and coolness. Yeah. But I gotta work on my Kung Fu.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

You love noodles.

SPEAKER_01 22:01

I do love noodles.

SPEAKER_03 22:04

He loves kung fu panda. It is it's his favorite. And I'm gonna be really honest with you. I have never seen it.

SPEAKER_01 22:11

Oh, you've listened out online.

SPEAKER_03 22:13

Okay, maybe that's what you do with the kiddos. Say we're having a kung fu panda a thon.

SPEAKER_05 22:18

There's four of them.

SPEAKER_03 22:20

Well, tonight, tonight we have Kenley has a dance. So I have to get her and her little friends ready because our friend Brittany, I have her daughter tonight to get her ready. They went sub Disney for two days. Just there was her, her husband, and another couple to drink around the world at Epcot. What that's hard. And I was like, I want to go. So the boys go the boys go to Canada every October to go hunting. So we've decided when they get back, we as the women are going to Disney to drink around the world at Epcot. Did you did you hear that? Michelle, we weren't part of the Wii. I was like, what you're a hundred. You have other friends, but star driving, Tessa. Yes, you have other friends that you go sing karaoke with. Only because you guys won't. I bring my microphone out on us almost every podcast. And yet have you guys said, hey, can we do a karaoke session on one of our podcasts? You guys have never because nobody wants to hear me sing. Yeah, nobody wants to hear me. Nobody wants to hear me. What's that? Well, I will tell you right now, if we ever do that, Courtney needs to be a button. I'm not, I don't sing like a songbird.

SPEAKER_01 23:44

The other week we were sitting on the couch and we were watching some show, and it had a couple that were both musically inclined that one played the instrument, one played the, or one sang, and she goes, Babe, I wish we were like that. I wish we could have a duo and sing and play an instrument. And I said, Babe, I guarantee you, I can pick up guitar right now and play just as good as you can sing.

SPEAKER_03 24:11

So Courtney did. I told you guys Courtney was in a play, right? She got the lead in the play. Oh, look at her. She's so beautiful. She was Regina George. She was Regina George, and let me tell you, Craig and I were unbelievably unprepared. He goes, This is a high school play. All right. He goes, babe, why is our daughter's ass out? And I'm like, she has shorts on. It's fine. He was like, hey, babe, where are the rest of these kids' clothes? And I'm like, I don't have an answer for that. Well, then she, have you guys seen Mean Girls where she kisses Aaron Samuels? My daughter did that. Oh girl, I love it. Courtney, if you can hear me, good job. I think she's sleeping. Um, I literally was like, oh my God, oh my God. Is she getting ready to kiss him? Craig's like, what the fuck's getting ready to happen right now? And I was like, I don't know. I'm not sure. I like put my sunglasses on and I was like, oh my god, it's getting ready to happen. She's getting ready to kiss up. Oh my god. She's she texts me, texts me after she gets off stage and is like, I'm very sorry that you and dad had to witness everything you just witnessed. And I'm like, preparation is key. Like, no, apparently it's called a theater kiss where you like put your hands up. So oh, so like you're rapping, and then yeah, so like his lips touched her fingers. I want to see you guys do it.

SPEAKER_04 26:05

No, you're not a walrus, Tessa.

SPEAKER_02 26:08

No, no, put your thumbs over topier. Yes, put your hands on his face.

SPEAKER_01 26:16

That's so much better. See? It was on camera.

SPEAKER_03 26:20

We're kissing like that from here on out. So much tender. Um, but yeah, like he hadn't slept in 48 hours because he just got home from work and he texts me, or he texts her at halftime or intermission and was like, I'm going home. You've done a fabulous job. I need sleep.

SPEAKER_02 26:37

He was like, babe, I'm so tired, and all I can see is my child up there with partially dressed, and I can't do this anymore.

SPEAKER_03 26:47

But she did wonderful, and I will tell you, she did a phenomenal job. Everybody stopped me and was like, she, the amount of confidence, like she was very Regina, she had all the sash, she had all the attitude, she was all the things, but it was a musical, so she sang. Oh, I love like everything was singing. It was she did so good and she was so powerful, but yeah, it was a little proud moments. Yeah, it is a lot. So, do you does she want to go into any type of acting career or singing or anything? Yeah, so she is getting ready to go. This will be when she gets done next month. She will go into her junior year. She had loaded herself, her schedule this past semester. So she only needs three 11th grade classes. Oh, nice. So she we signed the paper, she'll be doing dual enrollment at our local college. Her goal is to graduate high school and college in the same year, her two-year college in the same year. She will she wants to transfer, be a transfer student, finish her last two years of undergrad, and then she wants to go to Harvard. She wants to be a criminal defense. That girl. Oh my god, I'm gonna need her. Yeah, you are. I was just thinking that. That's gonna be awesome for Type. Where have you been all my life, Courtney? In her mind, in her mind, she will be done college by 20, done law school by 24. That's her Monica. That is amazing when you hear of a young person setting goals for themselves and it's and and exceptionally high goals. I think that's so amazing to hear. And I love everybody so proud of her. That's really, really cool. Yeah, yeah. And our high school pays for four college classes a year. Awesome. So she'll have junior, senior year, she'll have eight classes paid for by them. And she was like, What about the rest? And I'm like, Your dad and I like we'll find financial. Yeah, there's awesome. Yeah, like there's so many things. Yeah, so she's she's actually gonna take a class this summer. That's awesome. Because technically, as of right now, she's enrolled in Chesapeake, so we have to go to Chesapeake, figure out what classes she needs to take so that that way she can. Yeah, it's getting real. Yeah, yeah, mama. That's a rough. It's getting real. And Craig's like, what happens if all of them want to go to like Ivy League? Like, we're having the college conversation. Yeah, and you're like, and she's listing like UCLA Berkeley, UCLA Long Beach, Harvard, Yale, Brown, and his every word that comes out, she's like, he's like, Oh my god. And he goes, Hey, Court, none of none of those colleges are like in Maryland. And she was like, Ew, no, I'm not going anywhere around here. And he was like, Well, what if you need your mom? And she was like, She'll fly. And he was like, Well, what if you need me? And she's like, I guess I'll see you in a week when you drive there. He doesn't fly either, Adam. If I can get on a plane, yeah, I think it's great. Don't you start? Don't you start?

SPEAKER_04 30:16

I've asked you to fly.

SPEAKER_03 30:17

I have to figure that out. So sorry. We're just gonna put you. Can we put you in an oxygen mask?

SPEAKER_04 30:25

Yeah, I just she needs to get a bubble. Hey, I'd be you know the big bubbles that they roll down the hill in the person just stays in the middle. That's what we need to get to.

SPEAKER_03 30:36

We can get you your own heat. I wanted to be wheeled onto a plane like Hannibal Lecter. With uh I'll do it over my face and eye jacket on. I yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:48

So, Adam, what you don't know is my brother has a condo at Fort Myers Beach, right on the beach. Beautiful, beautiful. So we all wanted to get together. Only Tessa's like, well, I'm gonna see if I can get on the plane, which granted, you know, she's got her autoimmune disease. Is it a disease? Yeah, well, I think it keeps going back to it. Yeah, yeah. So, of course, I'm like, okay, okay. So she keeps sweating us office. I'm like, Tessa, like, I gotta let him know if we're gonna, it's free.

SPEAKER_03 31:15

I told her, just go there and have fun. I just need I've I've got a lock three months ago, but I know, and call airline actually January. So come back to your job, call airlines.

SPEAKER_01 31:27

And I think unfortunately, with my fingers down anxiety crap that I have that I know it's all in my head and mental, I think a lot of that has kind of rubbed off on her when it comes to the flying thing.

SPEAKER_03 31:38

No, I I will say, if I were to have a reaction on a plane and I don't have him with me, like when I do have a reaction, there's sometimes I can't even think to even know. I mean, like, it's I don't know what it's gonna be.

SPEAKER_04 31:54

If if you're just gonna have to be friends with the person next to you, hi, buddy. Like this is this is what's going on.

SPEAKER_03 32:00

I need I will fly to you and then we'll fly together. Okay, all three of us. We'll fly again and then we'll all because I I know that I sound like a big old wussy, but I have kind of dude with my throat closed. I busted your body. If people don't know what is happening and they don't know the what I need you to pop in my mouth and what I need you to stab into my leg, shut up, Adam. Listen, oh my god, that happened when we were in Florida last year. Before GoCon, we told you guys that, didn't we? About the the boy at the hotel that I thought he was having a reaction and I'm popping vinadry and stuff into his mouth, and I'm getting my EpiPen to stab him. And then the fire department gets there and he's like, Oh, I just had too many cigarettes. And I was like, What, dude? I thought your throat was closing. I was getting ready to stab you with my $600 epi pen. Hold on, wait a second. He had too many cigarettes. Didn't bother to tell us that when I've got my my um emergency bag spread all over the thing and on the ground with this kid going, breathe, breathe, breathe, popping pills in his mouth, and then the fire department pulls up and he's like, Yeah, I smoke too many cigarettes. And I was like, Are you what? I literally grabbed my merger because I'm like, I'm gonna get in trouble because I just fed this kid a bunch of pills, and I was like, Go, go, go, go, come, come, come in, come on, out of me. Oh my god. How do we get from conspiracy theories to here?

SPEAKER_01 33:33

I've listened to you guys before. It's not surprising.

SPEAKER_03 33:37

Okay, but we did get to a point where I'm gonna feel safe if I have somebody flying with me after I after I call them to make sure that it is a thing. Because I have to I do have a friend that cannot fly because of what they spray to um sanitize and to air freshener stuff in it. She absolutely can't because it will send her into a reaction. So I do need to make sure, and then we'll just fly to you and we'll all fly together. You guys are the sweetest and most precious babies I've ever met in my whole entire life. And I've I could do this don't help people back.

SPEAKER_01 34:14

But hey, I was gonna say I will say, if she does have a reaction and one of you has to stab her with the epi pen, I'm gonna be so upset because I have called first dibs and getting to stab me with the first pump.

SPEAKER_03 34:28

I'm not gonna lie, the whole town has. The whole town is like, I'm stabbing that bitch first.

SPEAKER_01 34:33

And I swear to you, get out of my instructions. It said jab and twist in the heart. Come to find out, I mixed up twist off cap and jab and pulp friction, but it goes in my leg.

SPEAKER_03 34:48

Yeah, yes, but like the only couple that have gotten to stab me are medical people at this point because I run, I ran from my 74-year-old mother on the highway down the interstate as she is on the phone with 911. My throat is closing, and I'm she's got the epi pen, and they're like, You gotta, you've gotta stab her, you gotta stab her. And she's like, She won't quit running. My poor 74-year-old mom is running down the side of the interstate chasing me with the pin on the phone with 911. It pretty soon it was thank god that the town that had the ambulances in it was literally five minutes away. They come pulling in sideways, jump out, tackle me, and bam. Couldn't but did you know what you were doing, or you were just so out of it? I am I am definitely afraid of needles. I'll get a tattoo all day long. But you come at me in the needles, this little, and I've had well, hell, that very first time that my throat closed, and I ended up in the hospital for that. They gave me what four. I know that it's not that bad. It's a little bad, but you come at me, and I so my poor mother, and she's like, I'm never fucking going anywhere with you again, ever. And when I had to take her to the doctor for x-rays because she broke her foot. I had a reaction, and it was her birthday. I had a reaction, I couldn't drive because some of my reactions, literally, you guys, my eyes will not open. Like, I can't even explain. And so she had to drive with her broken foot, drive me home on her birthday, the broken foot with my head hanging out the window.

SPEAKER_04 36:27

Oh my god, this is what I'm talking about. This is the shit when I tell my husband, you are not gonna believe Tessa's story again.

SPEAKER_01 36:35

Nobody ever does.

SPEAKER_03 36:36

You won't, and you're gonna see my poor mama. I mean, if people are driving by, I know, going, what the hell's going out there? I'm sure. Well, girls, this was fun. Yeah, it was fun.

SPEAKER_01 36:49

I've had a blast. Thanks for coming out being a part of the chaos fighting, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 36:57

Oh, I love it. Well, we're glad you're here. Yes, yes, and he will be back if I'm sure, because what else is he gonna do?

SPEAKER_01 37:05

True, got a bottom line.

SPEAKER_03 37:09

Oh, that works. Yes, yeah, I don't, but they do. So well, we love you all out there. Thank you for popping in and listening listening to us today, and we hope to uh see you joining us on the next episode. Bye. See you guys.

SPEAKER_00 37:28

And that's a wrap on this episode of Hair It First. Thanks for hanging out with us. We hope you laughed, learned, and maybe felt a little more safe through all the good hair days and the hot mess ones too.

SPEAKER_04 37:38

Remember, we're just sharing our own thoughts and experiences. No medical plans or professional advice here. Just real talk from stylists and moms who get it.

SPEAKER_02 37:47

Don't forget to follow, subscribe, and share hair at first with your fellow beauty lovers and boss moms. We will catch you next time with more stories, laughs, and probably a little conditioner in our hair.