SPEAKER_02 0:00

So, all right, we're doing it. This is the episode where we talk about the Holocaust. Um we've I think for all of our listeners out there, there's been like a a storm brewing that I'm sure some of our astute listeners will know has been steadily approaching. And this is the episode where I think the the rains begin to break and the and the skies begin to let loose. And because that's uh what happens when we talk about things like the Holocaust. Now, I do want to also say I, in an act of reclamation, and I don't know if you guys know this, but I did officially say, it was probably about two years ago now, that I was gonna exclusively refer to the Holocaust. I put that in quotes, not because it didn't happen, it did. Um, as the Holocaust.

SPEAKER_00 0:55

Okay, I was gonna say, I thought let me explain. So maybe I didn't do that. Maybe I didn't explain that too. I did.

SPEAKER_02 1:02

So about two or three years ago, I said uh as an act of reclamation, because of how much it traumatized me in my childhood, I was going to start referring to the Holocaust as the Holocaust. And so if with your permission, with your blessing, with the you know, with permission of the Secret Midnight Society, I'd like to call this the Holocaust episode. Is that is that okay?

SPEAKER_01 1:25

It would be great to open this episode because you said midnight. What's it called in Are You Afraid of the Dark? The Secret Midnight like that, like it's the opening of an Are You Afraid of the Dark, but they're all about to talk about the Holocaust for the spookiest episode. I mean, Holocaust is spooky. There's no question it's spooky.

SPEAKER_00 1:46

Damn, we could we we gotta remember we we gotta do a Holocaust part two on Halloween to Holly Holy Hall.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

You can do that, but yeah, Halloween, Holocaust, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:59

No, no, no. But you basically did do it. Um, I wonder why there aren't more like Holocaust Halloween crossovers just in general. Like why what? Holocaust is the way I used to say it.

SPEAKER_01 2:15

No, you really emphasize the hollow, like holocaust, like hollow.

SPEAKER_02 2:19

Oh, you're talking still about the marriage of uh Halloween and then the Holocaust, right? Oh right. So my first real exposure to the Holocaust actually takes place before Adam I can't look at you, I can't look at you and get that feedback he's got.

SPEAKER_00 2:42

The middle change is very funny to me. The Holocaust thing? Yes. I don't know why I think that is that funny. Oh, really? I find it very funny.

SPEAKER_01 2:54

I kind of feel like kind of sounds like like the millennial like cutesy talk to me.

SPEAKER_00 3:02

That's still funny to use that for the Holocaust.

SPEAKER_02 3:07

If I have Adam's comedy blessing, no offense, John.

SPEAKER_01 3:11

Adam's comedy blessing means way more than a laugh. There's nothing sweeter in life.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

Uh so it it it really started at Schechter, and when I was in first grade is when they start doing like so uh once you're in like lower school, they start doing like programming that's like adjacent to it on Holocaust Remembrance Day. So that was like at first, second grade, you're talking like about it, and I don't know if you guys had these Sadorum at in in the the chapel when you guys would go. Like, did you guys have chapel services at BT when you were in first grade? Or second grade.

SPEAKER_01 3:56

No, I think we would die in the classroom.

SPEAKER_02 3:59

Yeah, but but you had sidors, right?

SPEAKER_01 4:01

Yeah, you had yeah, because we had a C DOR program.

SPEAKER_02 4:04

Yeah. We gifted our C Dors so everyone on Sidor. Cool. Let me see if I can find that this will be a great prop. If I can find an online copy of the Sidor.

SPEAKER_01 4:20

Um what do we have to do for the C-DOR program while Jake's looking this up?

SPEAKER_00 4:24

I mean, I remember us being like on stage and singing. I mean, that was prime dun dun.

SPEAKER_01 4:30

That was you're right. That was like kind of when we first were initiated into the piano chord. But then how did Jake know about? Like Jake knew exactly what I was talking about, but they don't do that to us in high school, do they? Do they do not dumb in high school? Do they do what to you in high school?

SPEAKER_00 4:48

Dun done. The two chords. The two pianos.

SPEAKER_02 4:50

Oh, dun, dun, because Mrs. Latterman, she Ms. Letterman didn't teach at BT also?

SPEAKER_00 4:55

Oh, she did you guys had it at Schechter? Yes. Oh, oh Dum Dumb is whoa.

SPEAKER_02 5:02

The dumb dumb is Scheckter, baby.

SPEAKER_00 5:04

Well, no, it's BT too.

SPEAKER_02 5:05

I I I I I know I'm saying it was a Schechter day. It was cross. Oh my god. I think it's cross Jewish day schools. So if Mrs. Letterman didn't also teach at BT, who definitely taught at BT and Schechter was Mr. Cohen. Yes, yes. So Mr. Cohen could have been the bridge. It's not impossible. Oh, Mr. Cohen. Black Wednesday, November third, nineteen forty-three. For three days, three hundred prisoners working in two shifts had been made to dig three ditches, two yards deep and about a thousand yards long. Approximately one hundred SS men were then lined up in two rows to form a gauntlet, and groups of a hundred Jews at a time were made to undress, run the gauntlet to the L-shaped barracks, and from there to the ditches, men and women separately. SS men drove them into the ditches with rifle butts, forcing them to lie flat. Other SS men standing above them raked them with automatic rifle fire. The next groups were forced to lie down on top of the corpses of the previous ones. The killing went on for two days from 6 a.m. to 5 p.m., with SS men relieved at two hour intervals. During this process, two trucks were drawn up, up drawn up, blaring gay ballads, marches, songs, and dance tunes through a loudspeaker to drown out the victims screaming. 18,000 people were killed in two days. Okay, so that was uh my first exposure really to the Holocaust. Um that how old was I? I was I was in second grade because I remember um because we because these were the Sidors, and I I found a PDF of the full Sidor, Sidor Sim Shalom, can't forget that. Oh, I think those were the ones we had. Okay, so in the back of the sitter, there was an entire section on Yom Hashawa, and it was filled. I mean, that was one of the lighter stories, okay? And my little morbid brain in second grade sat in uh you know chapel reading these stories and not understanding what the fuck this was. So this was my first exposure. And I still think about these stories.

SPEAKER_01 7:38

Were you was reading that prompted by a teacher, or were you kind of just exploring? Okay, so that was just there and you went rogue. They're waiting for rogue.

SPEAKER_02 7:48

Um, my first question, I guess, to the school was like, why would you give these Sadours to the children? Like, do you expect that they're not going to like open it to a different page? Is the expectation now? I was a pretty voracious reader. Like I was a very early reader. I was in my own reading class because I was a very advanced reader. So, I mean, what did you do with that information in second grade? So I like didn't I didn't do anything with it. I just every Monday and Thursday morning when we had chapel, my morbid little fucking brain would open the sitter and you would read that and go right back to those pages. Oh, yeah, no, I I completely perseverated over it because I was just like, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 8:30

I mean, that when you're that age, you you kinda like the things that really frighten you, you kind of want to keep checking and on that.

SPEAKER_02 8:37

Right. I have to process it. I'm just like, I don't know what this is, but maybe if I keep reading, uh, you know, maybe uh 18,000 people were killed in two days will at some point make sense to me. So I I I like, yeah, I mean I held on to it. Then in like anybody about it? No. You just kept that all to yourself. I did. And I had a lot of nightmares about the Holocaust as a kid. All I read, I mean, if I haven't talked about this on the show, the only books, this is not an exaggeration. Nowadays, I can only read Holocaust books. In that sense, it is kind of a weird incel thing. It's like I can only get hard from reading Holocaust books. I cannot fucking I try to read anything else, and I'm like, I need another Holocaust book.

SPEAKER_01 9:22

I mean you're metaphorically still looking at the back of that book. What'd you say? You're still looking at the back of the book in you know, in some ways. You're still.

SPEAKER_02 9:31

I am constantly looking in the back of the seam show album. Yeah. It I thought it was in the rear view, but I am read and now I read this stuff and I'm like, please, 18,000 people in two days, I'll I'll see that and raise you, you know, 100,000 people in a week. So it's it it totally fucked with my with my sense of like what what makes me feel anything when I read.

SPEAKER_01 9:53

And they do you think they had taught you about the Holocaust like before you read that, or did you have like no concept of it?

SPEAKER_02 10:00

Nothing. Zero, zero. Because I vividly remember the first time really like doing Yom Ha Shoa programming was in like third, fourth grade. Because I remember the hallway where it happened. Say again. You must have pissed your pants. I didn't piss my pants. I'll tell you what I did. I had I had awful, awful somatic stomach aches. So I lived at Scheckter. I basically got maybe I feel bad for my parents because I probably got about 50% of the tuition dollars that they spent on actual education. The other 50% should have just gone right to Iris Engber, the nurse at who's Michael Engber's mom, who we had on the theater episode. So I I Iris and I had an amazing relationship because I lived in her office for about half of the school year because I was constantly having these awful, awful stomach aches. So on Yoma Show a day, I mean, that was like it it really did feel like I was in the Holocaust because I'm sorry, the Holocaust. Because I would go in and it was like right out of the gate. It's like, okay, we're gonna sit and watch this movie, or this person's gonna come in. This is back when survivors were like a dime a dozen. So they're coming in, they're telling you stories about the, you know, the gas chambers, and uh, and I'm like, I can't, uh like this is this is too much. It's too. I can deal with the stories in the back of the book. I can't deal with like I can't deal with uh um Devil's Arithmetic. That was the first movie that they showed us with Kirsten Dunst. Um, and I What's that one? Like, I don't know that one. So Devil's Arithmetic is about Kirsten Dunst is at a Seder, and at the Seder, I mean, not to spoil it, she doesn't actually go back to the Holocaust, but she like passes out and wakes up and she's in the Holocaust. And she's a wizard of Oz. It's a Wizard of Oz for the Holocaust. And so she's in the Holocaust, and at the end, you're like, oh my God, she's gonna go to the gas chambers, and then she wakes up at the Seder and it's like, oh, what a spooky dream. So in third, fourth grade, I really started to have to like come face to face with it. And so then in like fifth, sixth, and seventh grade, I would just be sick from school. I I I mean, if if if my parents kept track of the Jewish calendar, it was like clockwork. I would just had I was throwing up, I had a fever, whatever, whatever I needed to do, uh, you know, shove fingers down my throat to not go to school on Yom Ha Show a day.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

Okay, so anytime you knew a Holocaust day was coming, you acted sick. Yes. Are you really shoving your fingers down your throat too?

SPEAKER_02 12:25

I I've never once made myself throw up. And famously, I hate, like I am actually kind of afraid of throwing up. So I haven't thrown up since college. I threw up one time in college, I had a stomach bug. So no, I've never made myself throw up ever. So in eighth grade, you go to the Holocaust Museum. You go to the Holocaust Museum in DC. That was like an incredibly uh hard day for me. So my mom was a chaperone on the trip because she knew how unbelievably afraid I was of doing this. Um, there was there was like a teacher, Maura Plout, who I loved, who also, I think by that point, like I had confided in her at school. Like, hey, my God, just say you don't have to go. No, I I wanted to go. No, I didn't want to go. I didn't want to go. I'm sure it was compulsory, and I'm sure that my mom and Maura Plout together were like, we will be with you the whole time, and like obviously we will like cover your eyes for stuff.

SPEAKER_01 13:19

I mean, anytime you talk about your past life, I'm like, we met at the right time. We met at just the right time, Josh.

SPEAKER_02 13:26

Because I promise you, you would have been the villain in a lot of my stories if we had met any earlier.

SPEAKER_01 13:32

I just don't think we would have been friends, but I dude not only we would not have been friends, you would have been dunking on my sweet ass. I was never mean to anybody. I really wasn't. Josh is a nice boy.

SPEAKER_02 13:42

Yeah. I I bet you you were mean to people, but not in a way that was mean. I bet you that people I'm sure that there were people that were not as popular as you that you spoke to them in a way that they would have taken it as, oh, this guy's popular and he knows it, but you did not mean it as I'm popular and I know it.

SPEAKER_01 14:00

Oh, kind of like um like it's just kind of enough to be like, hey buddy, how you doing, and then keep walking.

SPEAKER_02 14:06

Yeah, dude. I guarantee you did that all the fucking time.

SPEAKER_01 14:09

Yeah, I'm so I'm sure you're right. I mean that's not necessarily like mean.

SPEAKER_02 14:14

It's not mean. That's what I'm saying. It's not you're not being mean.

SPEAKER_00 14:17

People might be could be resentful towards people.

SPEAKER_02 14:19

People would, I'm sure that there were people around that were like a little bit fuck Josh Miller. Like, I I'm sure that there were people. Oh, I'm sure, but um, but there were few and far between them and we hate them and we hope that they died. So for me, a big turning point as far as uh like social well wait, which story am I telling?

SPEAKER_03 14:37

Do you mean what what?

SPEAKER_02 14:39

Oh, you're pushing back on this? You couldn't even let that narrative persist. You couldn't even let that narrative persist for for five seconds.

SPEAKER_01 14:51

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 14:52

That is the I mean, if you wanted any more of a difference between you and me, it's like I would give you ten dollars if we could find a person in the class who liked me. And you and you think you don't think anybody in your class ever in the history of your time in schooling ever didn't like you? No. I truly think everyone I mean that is the most I know that is the most insane take I've ever heard. It is I mean that is boring. That is more we need to talk about, Kevin, than anything I have said.

SPEAKER_01 15:23

Okay. I don't think I don't I mean I won't be able to do that.

SPEAKER_02 15:25

You think you are thinking you are bad at 1,000 on likes?

SPEAKER_01 15:32

Yeah, I don't think anyone did not like me. I don't think I bet no one did not like Adam either. Like did not like him.

SPEAKER_02 15:42

Yeah, I think there probably were. Dude, like because you don't know. You don't know what other people are thinking. I it's I think it's just like in human nature, I just think that someone doesn't like anyone, right? Like, no, nobody is perfect. Essentially what you're saying is you think you were perfect.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

I just don't know if there's anyone in my class.

SPEAKER_02 16:03

Can I just say, just again, from just the way that I would imagine human development goes, I imagine you probably were actually were less likable back then because you were a kid and you're being a like you're being an obnoxious kid because every kid's being an obnoxious kid. Now you're like a fully grown adult who's very self-aware and very, you know, very charming, and and you're just like no kid is a hundred percent liked. It's just not possible.

SPEAKER_01 16:26

I'm he yeah, I I don't know how much.

SPEAKER_00 16:28

That's okay. This will keep Josh up at night for days.

SPEAKER_02 16:31

Wow, this is your Holocaust. We found your Holocaust.

SPEAKER_00 16:34

I think I I agree, Josh, that your I your reputation was like likable boy, like just like the friendly Yeah, just like everyone likes Josh. Yeah, but by saying that No, it's very unlike that someone resented you for people saying everyone likes Josh. Oh, yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_02 16:56

You think right?

SPEAKER_00 16:57

For that being the your reputation, there's gotta be some kind of figure out there who was resentful of that, some Jacobin figure.

SPEAKER_02 17:04

Huge target on your back, dude. You paint a huge target. Somebody, dude. And you know what, Josh? It's okay. Even if you were batting 995, you're still going to the Hall of Fame.

SPEAKER_00 17:16

I was gonna say you're still going to the Holocaust. And you're still going to the Holocaust.

SPEAKER_02 17:21

You know what? Whether you had one friend or a million friends, Hitler would have killed you the same. That's what I learned. That's comforting in a way. Isn't that comforting? We would have all been marched into the cattle cars together. We would have all been marched into the gas chambers together. All of our ashes would have intermingled. It's like your version of in the cup outside of my donic.

SPEAKER_01 17:41

When an astronaut goes into outer space and adds like a complete like re-evaluation of like human life. But instead of going to outer space, you're just constantly learning about the Holocaust. Yeah, Josh is going in that in that gas chamber just as much as I am.

SPEAKER_02 18:04

So, so in seventh, in seventh grade, or I'm sorry, in eighth grade, we have the Holocaust trip. So that was like a really big day for me. Um, in that I just like I really struggled. And there were there were like these video screens. And again, this just like speaks to the part of my brain that's like, I want to go to the last page of of the of Sid or Sim Shalom to read all these stories about kids being murdered. Uh, there were all these like video screens that had this like very ominous like police tape around them that were like, this is very bad. Like you have been warned. I dude, it was I serious, it was like a fucking crime scene. There was like all this like stuff around it being like, be very careful, like this is incredibly graphic footage.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

And that's the one thing you needed to see.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

No, but it was, but I think about it to this day because I've never looked at that footage, but I'm like, my brain was like one person who might not like me. Good. I I mean I knew that there was no fucking way too much.

SPEAKER_00 19:09

Right and Josh's personal holocaust.

SPEAKER_02 19:11

Yes. Let's go. What do you got, Josh?

SPEAKER_01 19:13

I I remember, but it was it wasn't a person in my class, so I don't know if this counts, but I uh I don't know who's who it was, but I remember I wrote an article for SMD, uh-huh, and I overheard someone reading and be like, eh, I'm not the biggest Josh fan. Wow.

SPEAKER_00 19:33

I mean that was very deep.

SPEAKER_02 19:35

Yeah, seriously, you really had to work for that one. But I like that in your narrative, like this person almost doesn't even exist. Well, I feel like it was it was a shadowy figure. I don't know if they were real. I don't know. I don't care at all. What are you guys talking about? I don't care. It's just so funny that like it's just so interesting how different we are. Because like I have spent my entire life being like, I have to work so hard to feel like anybody likes me. And you just had like a completely opposite experience. Like you are really struggling to try to think of one person that didn't.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

I mean, post-high school, I could name plenty of people, but um I mean what's funny to me is I think outwardly people would probably think we're pretty similar, and yet our backgrounds are so different. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:29

So uh so yeah, so eighth grade really like cemented, I think, my deep-seated like relationship with it. And also in eighth grade, we had to read Mouse, which I famously in my own life uh started reading and got so afraid that I took uh in my uh upstairs in my parents' house, there's like a big attic that's like very, very long. And I took the books and I was like so afraid that I viscerally like threw them in the attic so that they would I would never have to see them again.

SPEAKER_00 20:58

And I wish I had to really two on the nose almost. It's like two mountain. Yeah, it's like no, like your story. It's off the oh oh, I mean, these all really happen, though. These all really happen, I promise. I mean it's but everything was going to lie and it's all bullshit, but no, no, no. That's the whole that's the funny part is I believe everything you say, but it's so it's so perfect, it's so on the nose. Your Jew knows.

SPEAKER_02 21:25

So, yeah, so so eighth grade was a very tough year for me. Then in high school, then at Bethlehem, so there was Yom Hashoa stuff, and all of it, as I'm sure you remember, was or many of them were led by Maura Glazer. She was like the big Yom Hashoa, you know. Yeah, I do have court marshal. I don't know what what would you call the person that runs the parade. She was the she was the Yom Hashoa parade marshal. And so I in high school, I as I started to like find my sense of humor, I started doing like little. Many stand-up routines about Mauraglazer doing Yomha Shoa stuff because in Moriglazer's class for Hebrew, we would have to read stories about Yosef the talking carrot and shlomo the talking dog. It was all like the most inane Hebrew bullshit. And so I would do impressions of Mauri Glazer reading from you know uh Shlomo the talking dog, but Shlomo the Talking Dog has to go to Treblinka. So I started to like reclaim obviously a lot of the a lot of the Holocaust stuff, the Holocaust stuff. Then of course, I'm sure we all know the other shoe has to drop. So if the first shoe is the eighth grade um uh Holocaust museum trip, then the other shoe, the big shoe, is the 12th grade Poland trip. That is really where it goes sideways in a lot of ways. So the good news like it's all been leading up to this.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

It's all been leading up to this, right?

SPEAKER_02 22:55

So so the beginning of 12th grade, I was basically sick every day. I mean, I really was.

SPEAKER_00 23:00

Like I was just like in anticipation of the end of the year going.

SPEAKER_02 23:09

So by the time 12th grade rolls around, I certainly the beginning of the year, I'm just like, you know, it's low level anxiety all the time. But by coming up to the trip, I was just like, am I gonna? I mean, I was gonna go. I obviously was gonna go. But all I could think about was what the fuck is gonna happen on this trip? What what what what is gonna happen? Now, what am I say again?

SPEAKER_01 23:32

Like, what are you gonna see?

SPEAKER_02 23:33

Is that like, is that was that the it's it was what am I gonna see? But it was more, it was also just like, I really think it was more like what am I gonna feel? Because I I knew by 12th grade, I mean, I was I'm a stupid person and I was sort of a really stupid kid, but I at least knew, okay, there won't be any Nazis here. Like, I did have the frame of mind to be like, no one's getting killed in a in a gas chamber on this trip. But as I would find out pretty quickly, one of the first things that they tell you when you go to so for okay, well, uh I'm I was gonna skip ahead for a second. The first place that you go to is is Auschwitz and Birkanal. Auschwitz doesn't look like anything, it just looks like uh like a bunch of buildings. Like there's not, there's no, they bring out the, you know, they've they've moved the Arbeit Machtfrei sign there. So okay, you see that, and you're just like low level, like, oh God, you know, what's gonna happen? Then you walk in, you're like, oh, this is these are just like office buildings. Like you're like, there's nothing holocausty about this. And most of Beer Canal is destroyed, like it's mostly been bombed. So you're walking around, like you see the train tracks, you see the building, but there's nothing like overtly holocausty about it. There really isn't. It's just like a bunch of buildings. So, my donic, however, the one of the first things they say when you get there, first of all, you're greeted by a big cup of ashes, which I think is really cool. Um, you're like, oh, this is awesome. These are all these dead fucking Jews now. Now I actually have to think about this. And it's this old, old, old as dirt Polish dude with a Fisher Price walkie-talkie who's speaking to it, you know, like like he's talking to the group in this Fisher Price, walkie-talkie thing. And one of the first things he says is, This camp could be operational in a week. That I'm like, oh uh that's that's gonna be a that's gonna be a no for me, dog. That's that's a threat. That's now we're at now we're at at threat level, you know, five.

SPEAKER_01 25:20

It's like a real weird brag.

SPEAKER_02 25:23

It's a real weird brag. Right. And I'm like, and I'm like, you know who shouldn't be saying this? The Polish guy. I'm like, I anyone else I'm okay with hearing this news from, I don't want to hear it from the guy where it happened. It it was it was pretty freaky. Now, the the good news is that I am dealing with like an incel B plot at the time, which was very helpful. So while this is happening, it's of course prom season. So I'm in the process of being rejected by multiple people to go to prom. There's a bunch of stories about that. Uh the first person I was supposed to go to prom with dumped me because I was in a I was in a relationship with the loosest, the loosest quotes that have ever existed. This was never been brought up a relationship. What? I wasn't, but that's why I'm putting it on the quotes are so loose that they fucked all the time. Fucked all the time. So then I was supposed to take a different girl to prom where and there's a whole long story about that, but I I didn't because her boyfriend, so she was dating somebody, and her boyfriend ended up taking her. Whatever, not not a good story. So I'm on three. I'm on like I'm on like strike three, and I'm like, if this doesn't go well, uh, like I'm just not I'm I'm gonna go to problem.

SPEAKER_00 26:38

My donic is operational in a week.

SPEAKER_02 26:40

My donic is operational in a week. If this doesn't go well, so this old uh Polish guy takes us into a very functional gas chamber with very functional um fingernail scratches in the walls and very functional like death. He like pretends to lock the door.

SPEAKER_01 27:06

He's like out the window being like that.

SPEAKER_02 27:12

So I definitely, definitely blame my incel behavior of what's about to follow on dissociating from the absolute horror of what I'm now standing in. I mean, this is this is the Cedar Seam Shalom come to life. Like I'm standing in it. And so I just my brain immediately goes to who am I asking to prom? Like, like, how do I get a prom date here? And so I slide over to Allison Salman, and Allison Salman is crying, as she should be. I mean, this is the worst place on earth. And I just immediately go into like my little incel bag of tricks of just like, I am now going to console and parlay this into a prom invitation. I put my arm around her and she like accepted a hug from me, and already I'm just like, oh my god, my wildest dreams are coming from. Like, like your my brain is just so unbelievably scrambled. But I'm like, you know, are you okay? And like I asked the usual therapy open-ended questions, you know, how are you feeling? You know, is there anything I can do to help?

SPEAKER_01 28:22

Just the usual, like, just unbelievably I was very picturing now, like, anytime you asked out a girl, you were like, oh, I need to hear like the Schindler's List music music in the background, or this, or I will not be able to do this.

SPEAKER_02 28:37

So, so I so I was very successful. Like, I I mean, I was very successful at accomplishing my task, which was to not think about the countless children that died in this room, and instead think about like I could be going to prom with Alice and Selman. So Allie and I like walked around the gas chamber and the crematorium and the kids' crematorium, and like I mean, I was basically just in two worlds. Like I was just like in the room with the baby, you know, crematorium uh cart. And I was also thinking about like, you know, what tucks am I renting? Because I'm going to prom, baby. And so I was like, you know, do you want to go to prom with me? And um, and she was like, no. And I was like, okay. And she ended up going with like a very popular Israeli guy. And I was just like, motherfucker. Like, I is just like it, it it just like really crushed me. And so Israel was not a super fun time for me because I think I started to like both then let in all of the realities of what I had just seen, and also realized, like, oh, like I know I will never be loved. So it was cool. And then and then and then the real kick in the dick was that we also had to go to Yad Vashem, the Holocaust Museum in Israel. So it was just like, why are we putting so many hats on hats here? Like, we we like we don't need to go to Yad Vashem. This is not necessary. And so then I had a whole anxious experience with that, and the rest of my Israel trip was not was not great. And so now all I can do is read about the Holocaust.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

So I guess for the next episode We have to have Hitler on. Um, no, we have to do is just have like 15 people on for my grade and just ask them if anyone didn't like me.

SPEAKER_02 30:23

I and and what also makes you super likable is that you're gonna say yes and then first of all, right. I mean, like I know the perfect ending to this episode. You were like, hey, this is Jake's Holocaust episode. Then you're like, from that, I should take, let's make sure I was really liked in high school. Okay, but we should do it. I that was where I was going with this, is we should do it because I do think it would be funny if we had everyone on and then one person in my SMD article. I that's what I'm saying. I think it would be funny if one of those people was the person that didn't like you at the time. I think that would be very funny.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

Well, if we set up Oh, did we set up did we set up our hotline? Because they could call anonymously and say because we could we could also solicit to if people, you know, if they're they didn't they didn't like you themselves, but they knew they heard someone, someone wants to say something bad about you.

SPEAKER_02 31:16

If someone fucking calls that hotline, oh my god, oh I pray to fucking Hashem. If you are listening, if this didn't get edited out by Josh, who could now be doing everything in his power to make himself be liked, but if if this doesn't get cut out, please if you're listening to this and you didn't like Josh in school, please call this hotline and anonymize your voice. Make it so that we don't know who it is, but please call and tell us that you did not like Josh. Just so that he can be taken down.

SPEAKER_00 31:47

Yeah, that actually that's like at the end of every episode, we need to remind people to uh God.

SPEAKER_02 31:53

Seriously, I'm serious. I really will I will not rest until until we find one person.

SPEAKER_01 31:59

This should be the new did you fuck in high school? Like, you know how that's yes, with the arc of season one. Oh wow, wow, that's totally right, Josh.

SPEAKER_02 32:08

You're totally right. This is the arc of season two. Okay, so the hot line is going to be a number that we would love if our listeners would call. And right now, the hot question that we pose to you is were you in Josh's grade? Uh, and did you like Josh? Or is there a part of you maybe that didn't like Josh? And we're really way more curious about the part of you that didn't like Josh. So if you or someone that you know did not like Josh in school, please give this number a call.

SPEAKER_01 32:44

908-280-1487. That's nine zero eight two eight zero one four eight seven. Did you also say if you heard of anyone who didn't like me? Yes. Is that you or you anyone knowing? Do you know that kid who was not a fan of that SMD? Yeah, I don't know if he wasn't a fan of the SMD article. He just wasn't a fan of me. So please call. I'm begging you to call.

SPEAKER_02 33:19

Yeah. Please. It's very important to us. I I it's really important to me because I really need to.

SPEAKER_01 33:25

Maybe you didn't like me just for a moment. You know, like maybe it wasn't necessarily like you didn't like me.

SPEAKER_00 33:31

Yeah, you could tell an anecdote anecdote where he's kind of paints Josh in a bad light.

SPEAKER_02 33:37

Absolutely. Guarantee you he inadvertently killed someone or something.

SPEAKER_01 33:44

Like shit like that.

SPEAKER_02 33:45

Did I ever do that to you? Did he ever did Josh ever say to you, check you later? If he did.

SPEAKER_01 33:52

That's the worst thing he can imagine that he did.

SPEAKER_02 33:54

Right.

SPEAKER_01 33:55

In Josh's mind, it's gonna be like someone like comes on and be like, he called me the N-word.

SPEAKER_02 34:03

If Josh did that to you, you must call. I mean, I there are no ifs, ands, or buts. I have to know. All right, good app. Good stuff.

SPEAKER_01 34:16

Love you guys.

SPEAKER_02 34:17

Love boys.

SPEAKER_03 34:22

Okay.