The Profile of a Godly Woman (Proverbs 31)

A mother’s voice can carry a lifetime of lessons, and this conversation brings that wisdom into sharp focus. We begin with kitchen-table memories and a few well-earned laughs, then turn to Proverbs 31, where a mother’s counsel to her son unfolds with striking clarity. Her first charge is bracing: don’t give your strength to destructive desires, and don’t let alcohol blur the judgment that protects the vulnerable. These aren’t abstract warnings; they are born from the wreckage that unchecked appetite can leave behind, especially in leadership.

From there we explore the famed portrait of the virtuous woman, not as a crushing checklist but as a poetic vision of wisdom embodied. She buys fields, plants vineyards, turns craft into commerce, plans for winter, and opens her hands to the poor. The text dignifies both domestic and public work, showing how prudence, industry, and compassion can thrive together. Far from glamorizing burnout, it champions purpose: effort aimed at service, foresight aligned with generosity, and excellence anchored in reverence for God.

We also consider reputation and influence. The husband known in the gates stands taller because of her integrity, a reminder that private character shapes public credibility. Beauty makes an appearance, but only to be put in its place. Charm can mislead. Beauty passes. Fear of the Lord endures. That’s the throughline—character over image, substance over sparkle, legacy over moment. By the end, we’re invited to set guardrails around desire and drink, steward our resources with wisdom, and build what time cannot erode. If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review with the one principle you plan to practice this week.

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Transcript

Lessons From Mom And Childhood Humor

SPEAKER_00 0:48

Some time ago, someone in my church sent me a humorous list of things his mother taught him while he grew up. It read, My mother taught me the value of cleanliness when she said, If you and your brothers are going to kill each other, go outside. I just cleaned the house. He also wrote, My mother taught me the value of perseverance when she said, You're going to sit there at that dinner table until you've eaten all your spinach. Well, I can identify with that one. How about you? Many a night I'd be alone at the dinner table with green peas left on my plate, and I can't stand green peas to this day. Obviously, they're the result of a fallen world. My mother would tell me I had to stay at the dinner table until those peas were all gone. Well, I started storing my peas under the rim of my plate and then mashing them under the rim so they'd stick, and then I'd volunteer to rinse off the dishes. Well, my mother finally figured that out and she went out and bought clear glass plates. And that ended that practice. Well, frankly, there are too many things to list that I learned from my godly mother growing up. How about you? She would often point out a plaque hanging on the wall of our missionary home where my three brothers and I grew up, and it read this only one life 'will soon be past, only what's done for Christ will last. Well, we've arrived at the final chapter in the book of Proverbs. Guess what? It happens to be advice from a mother to her son. The chapter begins here in verse one with this heading, the words of King Lemuel, an oracle that his mother taught him. Now we don't have any record of a King Lemuel in the Old Testament, but Lemuel means belonging to God, and I agree with some Old Testament scholars that Lemuel was actually a special name for Solomon, given to him by his mother, who had dedicated him to God. And Solomon's mother, of course, was none other than Bathsheba. So a dedication of Solomon to the Lord would represent her own personal testimony of repentance and commitment to the Lord, and she wanted nothing more than for her son to follow the Lord as well. I think it's interesting that her first piece of advice to Solomon is a warning here in verse three. Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings. She would know, wouldn't she? Because of her sin with King David, she would see his family filled with trouble and division. It's actually sad, having read this, to consider that Solomon is not going to heed his mother's advice. Women will certainly enter his life, they're going to destroy his godly reputation. He's going to allow them to destroy his walk with God. Well, a second warning from Bathsheba concerns the dangers of alcohol. She says to him here in verse five that drinking clouds the minds of kings. She says, They drink and forget what has been decreed, and pervert the rights of all the afflicted. Now I'm guessing here, but who knows? David might have been drinking that night he saw Bathsheba down there in her courtyard bathing. Did he drink and forget what had been decreed by the Lord as it related to adultery and how a king should act? Why would he act so foolishly? Well, following these particular warnings, Bathsheba now begins to describe for Solomon the profile of a godly woman. Here's the list for finding a wife, and it stretches some twenty two verses. This list, by the way, reminds me of godly characteristics for a good husband. You'll find that in 1 Timothy chapter 3. It's required of men who lead the church, and frankly, it's part of a profile of every man who wants to be a godly man. Now that list is always intimidating to me, but let me tell you, it's good for me. I'll never get it all down perfectly, but it is the goal of godliness for you and me, for every man who belongs to the Lord to pursue. Well, no woman's going to get this list down perfectly either. But these twenty two verses give us the goal of godliness for women to this very day. Now, this section beginning here in verse 10 is actually a poem. It's an acrostic poem. Each verse begins with a consecutive letter of the Hebrew alphabet, and it made the passage easy for the nation of Israel to memorize. And it begins with a question here in verse ten. An excellent or virtuous wife who can find she is far more precious than jewels. In other words, a man can be financially poor, but if he finds a wife like this, he's a wealthy man. He can trust her, verse eleven says, with his heart and with his life. Now when you read this list, you're going to find out she's one of the hardest working women on the planet. In fact, no woman is going to be able to keep all this up without these maidens that she has working for her mentioned here in verse 15. She evidently had a household staff of women. My wife has often joked with me that she'd be able to fulfill Proverbs chapter 31 if I just hire a houseful of women to work for her. Well, for my faithful wife and more than likely for many of the wives listening to me today, you don't have a house full of people working for you, do you? It's probably just you. Well, even if it is just you, Bethsheba gives some great advice here. She adds to the list a description of financial discernment. We see her here working not only at home, but earning money outside the home. Verse sixteen says, She considers a field and buys it. With the fruit of her hand she plants a vineyard. Down in verse twenty four, she makes linen garments and sells them. She delivers sashes to the merchant. She's not just selling clothes in the marketplace, by the way, she's clothing her own family. Verse twenty one says she's not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. That word translated scarlet actually means double garment. So their garments were doubly thick for the cold, snowy winter. We're told here in verse 20 that she cares for people outside her family. She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. Now don't think she gives everything away and walks around dressed like a pauper. We're told here in verse 22 that her own clothing is fine linen and purple. Well, that statement represents a measure of wealth and fashionable taste in clothing. Now we're given a rather brief glimpse of her husband here in verse 23. He's a man who's known in the gates. He's sitting among the elders. That means he's a well-respected man, perhaps even a judge. So the idea here is that his wife is increasing his credibility. She has increased his respectability by her actions and by her reputation. So it's no wonder that this poem includes a personal statement now from her husband. In verse 29, he says, Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all. Now we know from the record of 2 Samuel that Bathsheba had been a woman beautiful and charming enough to get the attention of David's faithful soldier Uriah. This renowned warrior married her. Sadly, Bathsheba also was beautiful enough to get the attention of David, who abused his power, manipulated his role, asking to get Bathsheba into his palace that night. But now just listen to what beautiful Bathsheba has to say about beauty here in verse 30. Charm is deceitful. Beauty is vain. But a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Would you listen to her as she's giving counsel to her son? Charm, oh, that that can be deceitful. It can get you into trouble. Beauty is vain. It can be vanity. It can be empty without any relationship with the Lord. It doesn't lead to satisfaction. Let me tell you, if you have a godly mom, if you are blessed to be married to a godly woman, well, she's going to hand out this same advice. She's going to be more concerned with her character than her complexion. She's going to saturate her mind more with the Word of God than with the latest trends. She's going to challenge her children, if she has any, to pursue the approval of God and the attention of God rather than gain the attention and approval of people. She's going to live by this principle. Only one life, 'twill soon be passed. Only what's done for Christ will last. With that, we finish our wisdom journey through the book of Proverbs. Until our next journey begins, beloved, may the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. Amen.