4. You Can Change Your Life By Changing Your Lens - The Power of Perspective

This episode explores how the way you view the world shapes the way you show up in it. We dig into the difference between perception and perspective, using real-life moments and Moses’ encounter with God in Exodus 33 to show why a broader, God-centered viewpoint leads to better decisions and calmer responses.

We talk through how quick assumptions form, how most conflicts come from misunderstanding rather than malice, and how empathy can turn tense situations into productive conversations. Along the way, we highlight practical mindset shifts around gratitude, fatherhood, and choosing responses that protect your peace.

To help you put it into practice, we lay out four tools for shifting your perspective: approaching God with an open heart, stepping back to gain mental distance, seeking wise and truthful counsel, and keeping your focus on what matters eternally.

If you want to grow in patience, clarity, and leadership, this episode gives you simple, actionable ways to develop a more grounded, uncommon perspective.

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Transcript

Baby News And Hospital Humor

Jon 0:10

Welcome to the Uncommon Man podcast. I'm John. I'm Devin Jeffries. And we are. I'm fantastic. What about you? Yeah, I'm pretty good. I got a new baby at home, baby. It's uh new baby. Tell us about the baby.

Devin 0:24

So baby girl number two, Blakely, Alora Jeffries, made her grand appearance into the world on December the 12th. And mother is doing great, baby is doing great, and quite honestly, probably one of the easiest babies out there. Lucky you. Yeah. Like sleeping through the night from three weeks old.

Jon 0:45

Don't tell too many people that they'll want to murder you as well. They might kill me.

Devin 0:49

Yeah. No, that's that would be understandable. That was the whole hospital stuff. A nurse wanted to kill me a couple times. A couple times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I could see that. Really? Yeah. Her feeling. I've wanted to kill you before, son. Wow. All right. If I'm not on this next episode, you'll know why. Anyway, so yeah, so I got I gotta tell you this real quick. But there was issues with blood pressure every time she had a contraction. And they said, Miss Jeffries, there's a cause for concern because the only thing that we can do is have you rotating constantly, like every 10 minutes. And so my wife for like four and a half hours looked like a rotisserie chicken. It was God like every and I'm over here just stretched out, you know, laid out on the most god-awful chair. Hold on. Does she know that she you think she looked like a rotisserie chicken?

Jon 1:43

If not, she will whenever she listens to this episode. Oh Lord. Yeah, if he's not on the next episode, it's not because I killed him.

Devin 1:51

Yeah, that's right. So they they said uh the issue is they were worried about the umbilical cord and you know, if the baby had a hold of it, and they said, Hey, look, if this situation doesn't improve, we're gonna have to go in and go get her. And I got just tears well uping, welling, welling, well,ing in my eyes. And I am, you know, now, and so I am terrified because my wife and I did not want a C-section. And I was absolutely just terrified. I had tears in my eyes. My wife's over there in the bed just boo-hooing. Like, I'm wondering how good the drain system was. Like, she's over there boo-hooing, I'm boo-hooing. And so I text my brother. And if you know anything about my brother, he he doesn't really have a filter, right? And so he he turns around, but but he's the most loving and caring guy you'll ever meet. And he turns around and he said, Well, how's it going, man? And I said, Well, they're concerned about this, this, and this. And he says, he said, What do you mean go in and go get her? And I said, Well, C-section. And then my brother, without missing a beat, with tears welling up in everybody's eyes in the room. My brother, without missing a beat, sends me this text in huge letters and it just goes, Open the sunroof. Oh and I was like, Yeah. So we were dying laughing. The nurse looks over at me like, oh my god, I can't believe. And then my wife and all of her infinite wisdom looks to looks at the nurse holding her stomach, and she goes, No, you have to understand that's just him. It's if he were anybody else and anything else, any other way, we wouldn't get that. But that was exactly what we needed. So shout out Dave, because that that made so much, like that brought so much light to the room, just that simple little text message. But and then a few minutes later, I told my wife that because the only comfortable position for her was to be on her knees and her elbows. And I started laughing, and my wife was like, What are you laughing at? And I said, Do you know what you look like right now? And about that point, the nurse turns around and looks at me, and I'm like, Oh god. I out with it. I mean, if she's gonna kill me, she's gonna kill me. And so I said, Baby, you remember that episode on Spongebob? Because she she really likes SpongeBob? Not me by any means, but she she really likes it. And I said, Do you remember that episode where Patrick's star is used as bait for something, and they like put Patrick on a dish in the middle of this room and all that? And I was like, You kind of look like that right now.

Jon 4:35

And so hold on, hold on. In the span of this, this the beginning of this whole episode, you just compared your wife to a rotisserie chicken and a fat pink starfish. Interesting color of hoodie to be comparing your wife to a fat pink starfish. Thanks. For those that are just listening, that's that's a very pink hoodie. So it's it looks like salmon, whatever.

Devin 5:03

Anyways, so I I look and I look at the nurse, and this nurse is like ready to stab me in the neck with something. And Brittany, I want to stab you in the neck with something. Britney is rolling laughing, she found it hilarious. That's word. And so so yeah, no, I mean everything went great. We were she

Fear, Relief, And Finding Levity

Devin 5:20

had the baby on Friday, and literally less than 48 hours later, we were heading home.

Jon 5:24

Well, that's good. Anyway, so today we're talking about perspective. Devin, yes, what is perspective? What are we what are we let me rephrase that perspective versus perception kind of.

Devin 5:40

So to understand this, you have to understand our perspectives come from my perceptions, and our perceptions are created from your belief, right? So the things that you believe ultimately will develop into your perceptions, and then your perceptions of said beliefs will eventually then go into your actual perspective.

Jon 6:03

And for a definition, a perception is what you interpret, your understanding of a situation. Perspective is your point of view, it's the lens through which you view the world and determines how you view yourself, other people, and everything else.

Devin 6:20

Yeah, your your pers your perspective will view or will will determine everything for how you are going to take on certain challenges in your life, how you're going to judge or not judge certain people. And ultimately, it it's got a lot to do with who our foundational core is. And I think one of the best examples found in scripture is with Moses. In in Exodus chapter 33, verse 12 is where I'm gonna start. And it just says, check this out. Moses had an audible, like person to person, how you're talking to me and I'm talking to you, conversation with God, with the God of the universe. Jealous. Are you I mean, yeah. How many people do you think would just be like, could you just give me like we're all begging for signs, and Moses is over here like I got God on speed dial. Literally. Anyways, check this out. This conversation between Moses and the Lord. Moses said to the Lord, You've been telling me to lead these people, but you've not told me, you've not let me know with whom you're gonna sin with me. You've said, I know you by name, and you've found favor with me. If you're pleased with me, teach me your ways so that I may know you and continue to find favor with you. Remember that this nation is your people. I love that Moses is over here reminding the God of the universe that Israel was his people. In case he forgot. Just in case, God, this is these are your people. He continues. And God replies, He says, My presence is going to go with you, and I will give you rest. Moses replied, If your presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. How will anyone know that you're pleased with me and with your people unless you go with us? What else will distinguish me? In other words, God, how are you how are you going to make me different and sound different and get these people to listen to me and to believe me and what I'm saying? And not think I'm just a crazy guy, right? The Lord replied to Moses, I will do everything you have asked because I'm pleased with you and I know you my I know you by name. Moses said, Now show me your glory. It's kind of like reasoning with a toddler, right? Reasoning with a six-year-old. What? Well, so like Moses here, because a toddler goes, Give me juice. You give the child, you give him juice, well, give me pizza. You give him pizza, well, give me a hundred dollars. And the like, so what I'm saying is they're reasoning, like I got you. I got you. Yeah. So Moses is going, Well, show me this. Well, now show me this. Well, now show me that. Right. And then here's God's response. He said, I will cause all of my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord, in your presence. I will have mercy on who I'll have mercy, and I'll have compassion on who I'll have compassion. But he said, You cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live. And the Lord said, There's a place near me where you may stand on a rock. When my girl glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I've passed by. Then I'll remove my hand and you can see my back, but my

Defining Perception Versus Perspective

Devin 9:46

face must not be seen.

Jon 9:48

So, according to your analogy, Moses asked God for juice, pizza, and a hundred dollars. And God was like, All right, here's the juice and the pizza and 75 bucks. Yeah, pretty much.

Devin 9:59

So got it. But I think I think one of the biggest areas that people struggle with is to gain perspective of a situation. Because perspective, understanding perception versus perspective, gives you a very clear advantage in every aspect of your life. And in that perspective, because this is very easy to get twisted backwards. Perception is unique only to you. It actually gives you no advantage because it's how you interpret the world around you. The reason in a snapshot. And it's through your two lenses that you have that God gave you in the form of eyeballs. That's your perception of a situation. People argue because what they're trying to do is to convince everybody of what their perception is, of what they're seeing. But the way to win, I believe, in relationships, in your marriage, in your workplace, with your boss, with whoever it is, with your friends, the way to win in those relationships is to move off of perception and into perspective.

Jon 11:19

Right. So I know we we've you've said this like three times already, but so people generally aren't vindictive, they're not actually trying to cause you harm. What their opinion is all trying to get me. It's it's an all-out assault on me. Excuse me. Sorry. Yeah. Do you need to let her get some taste something? Hush. Anyway, so people's perception, sorry, perspective of the world gives them a perception. They want to they they know what they think, they know what they saw, and they know based on beliefs that they've developed throughout their lives, leads them to this perspective. When someone else disagrees because of at the core, because of their beliefs, and a s and a different person Hold on. I'm getting this backwards. And a different perception, their perspective is different. And now these two people disagree on whatever this thing is. Right, but as you said a minute ago, that's why people argue about things.

Devin 12:32

Because everybody is trapped in their own perception.

Jon 12:36

Right. But if you can if you can see things from someone else's perspective, if you can step into their perspective, let's say you and I have a disagreement on something, whatever that may be.

Devin 12:47

Let's go friends, the show friends versus the office.

Jon 12:53

I don't think those two things are that comparable. But anyway, because they're they're just different. Whatever. Friends is better than the office.

unknown 13:02

All right.

Jon 13:02

Fight me. That's the plan. Not literally. No, we're not actually fighting. So for whatever reason you think that Friends is better than The Office. And for whatever reason, mostly because I'm right, is I think that Friends is better. Sorry, The Office is better than Friends. You can't even get your show right. I got it right. I corrected myself. Anyway.

Devin 13:28

We keep receipts around here.

Jon 13:30

There's there's some reason that you think that your show is better than my show. Right? For whatever reason that is. We could sit here and argue about it, or I could stop and look, try to look at the look at it from your perspective. Why do you why is it that you think that? Because you're not just sitting here, you think you're right. I think I'm right. Now this is a ridiculous thing, but yeah. This is a ridiculous thing to argue about and actually fight over, right? Yeah. But I think it gets helps get the point across. If I could just stop and ask, just straight up ask you if that's an option. Why do you think that? What is it that makes you think that friends is better than the office? Like I could try to walk a mile in your shoes, if you will. Sure. See see the world through the way you're seeing it from your perspective. Step into your perspective and understand why you see the world the way you do. If you can do that with another person, then you're gonna approach that person a lot differently. Whether you completely disagree with them on everything in life or not, you maybe you won't get along that well, but you're gonna approach that person differently. If you're on completely opposite sides of, I don't know, the political aisle, right? It's not like this, it's not like the person you're disagreeing with is just they just want harm and chaos to the whole country. That's not the case. They think they're right, and there's a reason for that, and it's based on their beliefs, right, which created their perceptions, and now they have a different perspective on life. That's right. If you can step into that perspective, most people aren't gonna do that. So if you can do that, it gives you

Moses, Scripture, And The Power Of Viewpoint

Jon 15:30

a clear, a clear leg up in your own life.

Devin 15:34

I I think it's kind of like if you if you have something, or let's just say a situation where somebody gets, I don't know, gunned down in the ghetto. Okay. All right. I know based on comments that I've read that there's a lot of people who just go, yeah, well, that tracks. Yeah, well, that fits. What nobody takes the time to try to figure out is why? And look, is there a reason in everything? No. But nobody takes the time to look and go, what can I do to help? What can I do to help that mother or that father who feels like they can't take they can't go anymore? What can I do to help that family who doesn't know how they're gonna pay next month's bills? And so, yeah, desperate people do desperate things. And it can be, yes, it is also true because these two things can be true. Stupid people do stupid things. That's gonna happen. But the question becomes when do we take a step back and go, what is it that drove them to this point? Everybody is fighting a battle you know absolutely nothing about. Yeah, I could sit here and list off 10 things that I don't like about you. Really? Maybe not 10? Yeah, you're right, probably 15 or 20. Anyway, so but there's you called me a pink starfish. You called your pregnant contracting wife a fat pink starfish.

Jon 17:26

I did not call my wife that you did.

Devin 17:29

I did not. We're moving on, anyways. So I if but if I list those things off, and then it becomes okay, but I never asked the question, why? Why is John like that? Why is Devin like that? And I never asked the question, why does this person who I claim I don't like that I barely freaking know? Or don't know at all, or don't know at all. Why we don't stop and just ask why this is the way that it is. Now it doesn't mean you have to agree with one of that's right. And it may not mean that you're gonna even like them after that. But what it will do is it will change the way you interact with that person. Oh, yeah.

Jon 18:11

If you found out the why it like if you're going to interact with someone and you disagree with them on something, I would highly recommend you just try to get their perspective on it. That's right. Because if you do, there's there's no point in just arguing over something, right? Like if you think one thing and someone else is like, I disagree with you, like, all right, cool.

Devin 18:31

I'm gonna give you a really, really quick, easy way to determine if something is worth losing your mind over. You ready? Sure. I don't know if I am, but go ahead. If somebody, if somebody or something goes wrong in your day, ask yourself this one question. Is this going to matter tomorrow? Oh, that's actually really good. I thought you were gonna say something cheesy. If it's no, no, no, no, if it's not going to matter tomorrow, it's not worth getting upset about today. That's true. And then the second question you need to ask yourself, this is bonus material. The second question you need to ask yourself is am I when somebody, like another human being, takes you off or does whatever, I think it would be great for you to ask yourself this one very, very simple question. Am I willing to give that person the keys to the car to ruin my day?

Jon 19:22

Hmm. You know, you know, I like that a lot. And I would even double down on it. Sometimes it is gonna matter tomorrow. And sometimes it's still not worth getting upset about, even if it is gonna matter tomorrow. Even if it is, but then but at least then you have a little bit of a leg to stand on. You see what I'm saying? I mean, I guess. But it depends on your definition of when you say get upset about it or get mad about it. Like, are we talking toddler tempered tantrum? No. Because that's pretty much never okay. No, I either way, you always have a choice to not I I get what you're saying. I'm not trying to argue with you here, but The I I would even say, even if it is going to matter tomorrow, still seriously consider making the choice to not be upset about it. Cause generally speaking, it's not.

Devin 20:11

If it ain't going to matter tomorrow, it's not worth screwing up your day to day. Right. You know what I'm saying? Absolutely. Like a couple weeks ago, I was at the DMV for something, you know, where everybody's in such a great mood. I'm at this DMV and I'm already in my seat. Sounds like an opportunity. Do what? Sounds like an opportunity. Right.

Jon 20:27

To cheer other people up. I try. I mean sorry. I'm just I'm just railroading.

Devin 20:33

I don't know exactly who are from all over the place. Go ahead. Anyways, so I'm sitting in my in my chair. I'm already inside. There's people, a couple of people standing outside. And the rule was to get because I had to get that stupid star ID thing. That's the dumbest thing.

Jon 20:49

People keep complaining about that. I did that like three years ago.

Devin 20:51

Okay. Well, my license just expired this month, so I had to go get it renewed. And so I had to get my little star ID, and which is the stupidest thing in the world. And this guy, they they have a very, very clear list of documents of what you need. Okay. And this guy comes up and he's got his

Escaping Perception Traps In Daily Life

Devin 21:10

passport. And on the list was a birth certificate, not a passport. I don't know why. But this dude starts going off on the DMV worker. And the DMV worker had this like could not give two flying craps about the situation. And this dude just started screaming and yelling. Who do you think looked like to the moron at the end of the day? He did.

Jon 21:32

Right. They didn't look more, they get yelled at all day long. They don't care. Whatever. So this guy all finished yelling and leave. Right. Who do you think had the bad day going forward? For the record, don't you have to show your birth certificate to get the passport?

Devin 21:48

I think. Dude, it's the it's the DMV. Don't get me started on the government. Anyway, but what I'm simply saying is if it's not worth getting mad about, if it's or if it's not going to bother you tomorrow, it's not worth getting mad about today. It's not worth hanging on to today. If you were to simply take a step back and look at things from another person's perspective, you would gain a severe advantage. That's right.

Jon 22:14

Like at that guy. If he had just stopped and said, Why is she telling me this? It's not like she's lying to me. Right? If if I'm in the heat.

Devin 22:25

Now who wrote it.

Jon 22:26

Hold on, what?

Devin 22:27

The dude was ticked off at the DMV dude.

Jon 22:31

Okay, whatever. If the person behind the computer is telling me this, it's not like they're just telling me this to ruin my day. Right? They're not just they're not just lying to me. There's a reason they're telling me that. If you just stop and be like, why are they telling me that? Oh, because it's their job. There's no sense in me being mad about it. Stop asking. And then your interaction with that person, if you do that, takes a split second to do. Maybe like two seconds, whatever. But if you just take those two seconds, then your interaction with that person thereafter is completely different than just I won't get into flying off the handle.

Devin 23:13

What if the dude that got mad who was well we'll just say in this case, the I mean he was the customer, so to speak. What if the customer that got mad knew that the DMV worker, his wife had just said, I want a divorce after 20 years? You'd cut that guy break. You know what I'm saying? So like again, you have no idea. So if you just simply like take it, take a deep breath, man.

Jon 23:39

Yeah.

Devin 23:39

I tell my daughter all the time. I tell my daughter, that's right. I tell my daughter, my three-year-old daughter all the time when she starts to get upset, and I'm like, hey, take a deep breath. Just calm down. Because if you take a deep breath, she's the only woman I can ever tell to calm down. All right. So, but if but if you can just tell me about it. So, but take a deep breath, calm down, and approach it. Sometimes, even then, you're still in the wrong. And even if you're in the wrong, newsflash men, you want to be uncommon? I would hope you would want to be because you're listening to this podcast. But you want to be uncommon, go back and apologize.

Jon 24:20

Yeah, admit it.

Devin 24:21

When you screw it up, admit it.

Jon 24:23

You know what I mean? On up to your mistakes. That's right. Like, oop, screw that one up. So our takeaway from this, change your thoughts from I need to or I have to instead of I get to. I won't say our takeaway, part of part of the takeaway from this is here, you wanna that was that was your thing and your you wanna get it.

Devin 24:49

Yeah, yeah. So to me, I think if you change your thoughts in given situations from I need to or I have to, and you change that word need or have to get, I think it it it matters so much different. You know, so there's there's people who would say let's clarify that a little bit.

Jon 25:08

I I need to go where we where are we getting out here with this? The it what we're doing there is changing our perspective on the situation.

Devin 25:16

I need to go to the gym ver or I have to go to the gym versus I get to go, because guess what? There's people who don't, right? I need to go spend time with my wife, or I have to go spend time with my wife. I get to go.

Jon 25:30

Oh, you know what my least favorite is? What I want to punch men in the face.

Devin 25:35

If you're are you gonna say kids?

Jon 25:37

What?

Devin 25:38

Like men who say yeah, I need to go spend time with the woman, I have to go spend time with my kids.

Jon 25:44

When they use the word babysit. Oh my I can't stand it. You're listening to this, and you ever say that, stop it. Stop it right now. You're not I ever hear you say that we're gonna have problems.

Devin 25:55

We are not your kids are not, and this will be an entirely separate episode. Your kids are not a burden on your social life. Yeah, okay. You don't have to go babysit, you get to go spend time with your children. Because guess what? That may or may not be a possibility tomorrow. That may or not may or may not be a possibility next week. And your wife needs a social life too. So quit your crying. They're your kids.

Arguments, Entertainment, And Empathy

Devin 26:20

Let your wife man up.

Jon 26:21

Let your wife go to book club. Anyway, yeah, whatever it is women do, I don't know. Mine goes to book club. I can see that about her. Yeah. But it's we we need to we can change our perspective not only about another person, right? Uh we not only can we step into their perspective, but we can change our perspective about our own circumstances, our situation. Probably should have said that before I started talking about this whole need to get to thing. Yeah, that's fine. We got there. Guys, around like episode four, okay, kind of surprised. My bad. That was probably confusing for everyone. Anyway, so let's talk about how. Sure. How we change our perspective. Because I can sit here and tell you all day, step into that guy's perspective for a second.

unknown 27:12

Okay.

Jon 27:13

But how do you do that? How do I how do I get there? How do I change my perspective on my circumstances right now?

Devin 27:19

I have so I've got four ways that I'm gonna that I'm gonna illustrate this out. Okay. The first one, it's groundbreaking information. If you're listening, turn the music up or turn the podcast up. Get your pen and paper ready. Are you ready? Pray. Okay. That was an awesome drum roll. Get off me, all right? Pray.

Jon 27:45

I wonder if the mic even picked up that drum roll.

Devin 27:47

I don't know. Let us know in the comments. Literally, it's that simple. You want God to change an area of your life? Pray about it. But understand this. Your heart has to be ready for that. Okay. A lot of people love to just say, Wait, wait, wait, go back, go back. Your heart has to be ready for it. Go into that. Your heart has to be ready for those prayers. Your heart has to be ready for the for for God to make that move and that change in your life.

Jon 28:18

You have to be ready to receive what you just asked for. That's right. Nobody thinks about that. That's right.

Devin 28:23

Because sometimes the answer to your prayer isn't necessarily what you wanted it to be. It's it's kind of like some people they pray for a million dollars, but they honestly wouldn't have a clue what in the world to do if they got a million dollars. This is a you're right.

Jon 28:36

You're see what I'm saying? Also, let's like I just said, sometimes you the answer to your prayer isn't necessarily what you wanted it to be. Let's say you prayed for a million dollars, but God was like, Hmm, here's a hundred thousand. Moses, right? That's a ridiculous that's a ridiculous example, right? But it it gets my point across. Yeah. If you ask for something and you get almost that, God's like, not quite. Moses asked to see his face, and he's like, here's the back of my head. You see what I mean? He got to see him. The God of the universe. Yes.

unknown 29:12

God.

Devin 29:12

And had a conversation with him. Why couldn't I have been born several thousand years ago? Why couldn't you have been born several thousand years ago? Wouldn't be sitting here doing that. That's right. Anyway, so pray number two. So yes, so pray. Pray and ask the Lord to shift your perspective. Make sure you're ready for that. Number two, take a step back and analyze the entire situation. Take a step back at the end of at the end of a situation and analyze it. How could I have done better? What could I have changed?

Jon 29:39

You know something interesting? When some when people say take a step back, typically they don't mean literally take a step back. However, if you do literally take a step backwards, it helps you to mentally take a step backwards as well. It changes your posture, and then you're able to see it works for me. You're absolutely right, though.

Devin 30:03

It does for me too.

Jon 30:04

I think there's some science behind that. I don't know what it is, but I know it works.

Devin 30:08

Do you remember whenever I called you the night of Cultivate Joy?

Jon 30:11

Yeah.

Devin 30:11

Yeah. Okay. So that was after I took my step back. But what happened was that day, the plan all day long was for me to go with my family to that event. And for those of you who are listening and don't know what in the world's Cultivate Joy, our church, Cultivate Church in Alabaster, Alabama, does an event every year where we provide Christmas for families in our county in Shelby County, Alabama. It's one of my favorite things to do because I love the opportunity to be a blessing in somebody's life, right?

Jon 30:43

And my cultivate joy, if you will. Do what? Cultivate joy in someone else's life, if you will. Did I say my life? No.

Devin 30:51

I was just making cultivate. That's right. I enjoy I enjoy bringing joy to their their households, knowing that their kids are going to have a Christmas because of generation generosity and amazing people. And that particular day I had a work situation

Politics, Assumptions, And Humanizing Others

Devin 31:10

that caused me to run a little bit late. And I told my wife, I said, Hey, I'm going to be a little bit late. I'll get in the truck and I'll drive there whenever I'm done. And so my wife, my nine-month at the nine-month pregnant wife at the time, loads up our three-year-old toddler and goes by herself. And about an hour later, I'm getting ready to leave and I go get my truck. And it I noticed it struggling to start. Well, through to make a long story short, I went to the gas station. I finally was able to get it started. Whenever I left the gas station, I noticed I was having issues. The truck wouldn't get out of first gear, and everybody behind me was ticked. And I was just like, look, I'm sorry. And there ain't nothing I can do about it. But I instinctively, I would normally turn left, and instinctively, for some for whatever reason, I turned right. If I'd turned left, I would not have made it back to my house. I turned right, I made it back to my house, and I made a phone call to my brother, Dave, and one of my best friends, Justin. And within 10 minutes, both of them were there. And that's crucial to remember that because it was discovered that it was a bad battery. And so we're leaving to go get another battery. And right in front of me, I hear that sound that everybody freaks out with that they hear whenever they are in a car and shots. No, he had that too, but no, I didn't hear that. No, it was and I was just like nice sound effects. Thanks. And I was just like, oh my gosh. So sure enough, right in front of me, a a car had been rear-ended kind of aggressively. And I got out and I went across the street, told my brother to put the truck in park. I got out and went across the street, and there was a van full of kids in one of these cars and another woman in the other car. And I was able to like I went to the kid and I used a napkin or something nearby and dried a little bit of blood. He he just had a bump on his lip and dried a little bit of blood. And I just said, dude, you're gonna have an awesome story to tell your friends at school on Monday. And he goes, What do you mean? And I said, buddy, you can tell him like you fought a bear over the weekends.

Jon 33:36

We are not condoning telling children to lie.

Devin 33:39

You know, no, I'm not I'm not I'm not saying that. I was trying to bring a smile to the kid's eyes. I get it. But he was just like, he got all parked up, like, oh, you're right. And so I like I told the mother that I was like, hey, you know, take a deep breath. It's it's gonna be okay. Cars, cars are replaceable, okay? It's gonna be all right. And I went to the other van and she is freaking out. Understandably. I worked her through some breathing exercises and was able to get her calmed down. And then the police officer shows up and I was like, all right, well, I'm out of here now. But not before this police officer was like, A you. And I was like, Yes, yes, sir. I don't know why I immediately became like five years old. This dude was jacked, all right. And he's just like, Did you see anything? And I'm like, no, dude. Oh, I mean, yeah, like she hit it's kind of obvious, but they're fine, everybody's fine, all right. So the guy, the cop turns around and he's just like, Okay, thanks. Is he Batman? No, no, but then literally, while while we're standing there, another car a hundred yards up the road, rear ends another car, and I'm like, what in God's name is happening right now? So there were two wrecks within a hundred yards of each other. Anyway, so we go get the battery, we come back, we put it in, the truck starts, everything's fine, right? And we're I'm putting all my tools up. My my brothers left and I'm putting all my tools up, and I shut the drawer and I went to the opposite side of my garage, and I was about to walk inside, and it was just like right then and there, the spirit of God came over me. Because I was, I was, I was mad, like I was ticked that I didn't get to go to cultivate joy to do the thing that I wanted to do, that I really looked forward to doing, and I took a step back literally, took a couple of steps back, and I said, Okay. Because in that moment it felt like God was telling me, I didn't need you there. I needed you here, I needed you with that family, I needed you with those kids, I needed you to make that kid smile. And this is in no way anything that I did for for me. This is no way you like, look at me, this is all about the honor and glory of the father. But it was like I took a step back and looked out of the perception and looked into the perspective of the situation, the drone shot view, if you will. So take a step back and analyze the entire situation.

Jon 36:12

Right. And I think also in some situations, we have to consult with whoever you would consider your counsel to be, someone, a wise, godly person in your life. If you're a man, it should probably be a man, but someone that's an unbiased third party. In some situations, they might be big enough where you can't take two seconds to not get mad at the guy on the other side of the counter behind a computer, right? Sometimes it's a little bit bigger situation, and you need a little

What Actually Matters Tomorrow

Jon 36:45

bit of guidance.

Devin 36:45

Maybe you just need to say it out loud, honestly. But and and understand this, these people probably need to be biblically grounded. Not probably, they definitely need to be biblically grounded and spiritually mature people. They need to be people who are living an uncommon life as a man. Okay. So when it's unbiased, when you do that, like for me, I have three men in my life that between those three men, they know 100% everything there is to know about me. And they're there. Their purpose and their job is to call me out on my crap. If I screw up, if I do something wrong, if I whatever. It's called accountability. And the problem with the the problem with men today, I believe, is we have stopped accepting accountability.

Jon 37:33

Yeah. You have to, if you're gonna ask somebody to hold you accountable, you have to be willing to accept them holding you accountable. Just today, you know what happened? Someone, so there's two people I work with. I'm not gonna use any names. These two people, one of them asked the other, hey, sometimes I do stupid things. When I tell you that I'm doing something, I need you to tell me. I need you to hold me accountable. Basically going, I'm kind of stupid. I need you to hold me accountable. Right. Okay. This person told them the other person that they were doing whatever the thing was. They got ticked, didn't they? No. No. But the person that was supposed to be person, we'll do person one and person two. Person one said, Hey, I'm gonna do this. And person two, who's supposed to be holding person one accountable, said, Do you really think that's the best idea? Something along those lines. And they just went, shut up, and they're just doing it anyway. So they asked them to hold him accountable and then told them to shut up when they held him accountable. You don't actually want to be held accountable, you just want to you want to cover.

Devin 38:47

You want to cover.

Jon 38:48

That's exactly what that is. You just want to cover. So, anyway, point is if you're going to ask for accountability, just know it is not going to feel good.

Devin 38:57

That's another full episode in and of itself, is accountability. But understand this when you consult with your counsel, understand it may hurt. They're not going to tell you what you want to hear. If your biblical counsel, your your your counsel that you go to in life only tells you what you want to hear, you have the wrong group of people. Yeah. It's kind of the age old thing of like if you walk in a room and you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room. Yeah. Right? If if if your your counsel or people that you're that are holding you accountable in your life are not biblically grounded, spiritually mature people, might as well be sheep, sheep weeding sheep, right?

Jon 39:43

Sure. I think I know where you're going with that. Well, yeah. I know what you mean. Anyways, number four, I'm gonna start this off with a Bible verse. And it goes. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, and what is unseen is Is eternal, and that is the words of Paul in 2 Corinthians 4, 18.

Devin 40:05

So what did Moses do going back to the beginning of this? What did Moses do?

Jon 40:10

Let's dive into 2 Corinthians just a little bit first. Yeah, but I think they're related. I'm getting there. Hold on a second. So what is seen. Yeah, do that. What is seen is the world around us. What is unseen, unless you're Moses, is the Father. That's right. Point number four. Fix sorry. How we change our perspective. The fourth way we change our perspective. Fix your eyes on the father.

Devin 40:37

Yeah.

Jon 40:38

Fix your eyes on things that are unseen, unless you're Moses, because you gosh. You're really jealous of Moses. I am. Gosh. You need to reconcile that. Pretty sure I'm not supposed to be jealous of anyway. But yeah, you're right. It does very much relate to that. Because Moses was leading these super that's another thing. Don't let me get on a soapbox here, but like there's these people walking around in the desert complaining about food falling from the sky. Sounds pretty awesome. Can

DMV Story And Emotional Control

Jon 41:10

you imagine leading that group of people? Can you imagine being in charge of people that their food literally is falling out of the sky?

Devin 41:18

I mean, yes, I've been in charge of stupid people before.

Jon 41:22

For 40 years. Oh my gosh, I can't imagine. But what did Moses do? What did Moses do?

Devin 41:28

Moses simply fixed his eyes on God to change his perspective of the situation. I have to believe that the entire time for the 40 years that they're wandering around in the desert, I have to believe that Moses is over there going, hey, big guy. Any you got anything? Like, come on, dude.

Jon 41:46

Like, is this really the plan?

Devin 41:47

Is this really you brought us all out here to wander around in the desert? What in the world are we doing? I have to believe that at times Moses's Moses' perspective got a little jacked up.

Jon 41:59

Especially when God told him, again, told him with words, told him that he won't get to see the promised land. Yeah. His generation will not see the promised land. But he fixed his eyes. Can you imagine how he felt?

Devin 42:15

Oh my god, I'd be ticked.

Jon 42:17

I mean, he probably was.

Devin 42:18

Well, but again, his faith was greater. Yeah. His faith, his faith was greater.

Jon 42:23

Hold on. How did the story go where he where water came out of the rock? I think God told him to strike it and he like smacked. I don't remember. Yeah. God blanking right now. I'm not even gonna get into that. But it when I the first time I read that story, I was like, sounded like he kind of got mad at it and just like broke his staff or something. And then here comes the water. Right. Well, now he had it. We should look that up. Anyway. Because I'm blanking on exactly it, dude. Yeah, that was just a failure. All right.

Devin 42:56

Anyway. Oh my goodness. Anyways, I think that so so those are those are your four ways for how to change your perspective. Pray, take a step back and analyze the entire situation, consult with your counsel and fix your eyes on the Father. As John said when he read Second Corinthians, focus on what is unseen. Because what's seen is temporary. We get to, at the end of the day, guys, to live uncommon lives, we get to have a God in the universe that loves you more than you could ever begin to imagine. I didn't say you're gonna understand everything that he's doing. I didn't say it was gonna be easy. But if we want to truly begin to shift certain areas of our lives and be better men and better kingdom builders, I believe we have to simply change our perspective and the way we look at it. An event seen from one point of view gives an impression. Seen from another point of view can give an entirely different one. But it's only when you get the full perspective of the situation that you can truly understand what's going on. You may not understand why you're having to go through the battle. You may not understand why why the war is even being fought. But if I told you on the other side of it all is a unified front in a place of heaven that is so crowded that we're taking as many people with us as we can, short of sin, willing to do whatever it takes. Change your perspective, and I promise you, I promise you, you'll change your life. You got anything else?

SPEAKER_02 45:00

Yeah. It's kind of unrelated. Well, ended on aware note, I don't care.

Jon 45:06

So if we want people to live uncommon lives, if we succeed, if our whole little idea here succeeds, I think I think that this kind of the end of the uncommon man, because if everyone becomes uncommon, then they're common. And then we're you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 45:26

Oh my lord.

Jon 45:27

If we ask all of the people to be in the world, we're trying to help men and society today.

Devin 45:34

If we be if we but if they all become uncommon, then they're common.

Jon 45:38

Then we've done our job. Yeah. Then we've done our job. Then we gotta change, we gotta call it something else. The common man.

Devin 45:46

That's fine. You don't worry.

Jon 45:48

Anyway, why don't you press up? You're fired.

Devin 45:50

All right, I'm fired. You literally couldn't put this together without me. You're not wrong. Let's pray. Father, we love you. God, thank you so much for your love. God, thank you for John and this podcast. Thank you for the uncommon man. I pray, Lord, that you use the the recordings, that you use these videos to bring honor and glory to your kingdom to help men live uncommon lives, to change their perspectives and to live that way in uncommon. God, we love you. We thank you in Jesus' name. Amen.

Jon 46:24

Amen. Thanks for listening. Remember to like, share, and subscribe. If you know someone who would enjoy this, please pass it along. You can follow us on Instagram at uncommon.man or reach out at theuncommonman.podcast at gmail.com. Keep pursuing excellence and above all, pursue price.