Who are you without your physique?

Welcome to PUMP TALK: THE GIRLS ROOM— Where Strength Meets Sisterhood 💪🏽

Hosted by Raven & Candice female bodybuilders, this podcast is all about breaking barriers, building muscle, and empowering women to embrace their strongest selves — inside and out.

Each episode dives deep into training, nutrition, mindset, and the realities of competing, while keeping it real about the ups, downs, and everything in between. Whether you’re stepping on stage, starting your fitness journey, or just looking for motivation, we’re here to educate, inspire, and remind you that women can do it all — and do it strong.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Welcome back to another episode of the Pump Talk the Girls Room. We're so happy to have you guys back on another episode. It is Sunday, May 24th. It's almost June, almost halfway through the year. Pretty unbelievable to say the least. So this week we're going to be talking about who we are without our physiques. Who are we beyond the stage? Because what happens when the body that you worked for for years becomes the only thing that you like about yourself. So today we're going to talk about identity, body image, and who we really are outside of bodybuilding. I think this is a really good one. Kind of goes off the last podcast that we were talking about about just like confidence and comparison. And so I think it'll be good to piggyback on that. Um so I feel like there comes a time where bodybuilding becomes more than just a hobby for some people and comes into an identity. And I think that's where the trouble begins, is when instead of you see it as like a hobby or a sport that you play, it's like that's your identity, that's all you're self-worth, that's all you think about. Like, hey, if I'm not lean, I don't like myself. The abs are gone. Do I still like myself? And you know, sometimes you may feel like less attractive because you're not lean. And you know, when you're lean, everyone likes all your stuff. Everyone's talking to you, everyone's hyping you up. And when you're not so lean, it's like all that disappears.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

Yeah, it's really it's really a tricky one. Um, and I'd be lying to say I'm not guilty of it. Like it when you're a competitor in this sport, like it it almost has to be become part of your identity, like going through a prep, like especially if it's been a really hard one or you're dealing with like struggles, um, like being able to push through that prep to get to the stage, like it has to become a huge part of your life. Um and so then coming out of it, it's like, how do you kind of let go of some of that and get back to being more quote unquote normal, but you're still not normal? It's like really tricky. Um because I think about sometimes like I I've been training for like 10 plus years, but I didn't ever think about it the way I do now. Like it used to just be like, oh, I'm just going to the gym, you know? But now it's like, no, I'm going to the gym. The gym is my life, you know? Um it becomes such a bigger thing, and you really kind of have to like keep yourself in check. And honestly, the my last two preps, when I got to the end of prep, I was just so tired of thinking about myself all the time. I was like, the only the main reason why I'm ready to be done with prep is because I'm tired of like everything being about me. Like I wanna, I want it to be about other people, like not about me. Like I'm I'm tired of thinking about myself so much, you know?

SPEAKER_01 3:01

Yeah. And it's hard because it's it's an extreme sport, it's different than like any other sport that you play, and you can't have the same mindset, and it's almost like it becomes your identity because your whole life has to be centered around bodybuilding and like your diet and your training. So it's hard not to, but you know, it is a hobby that we do. I mean, for most of us, it's not a job, we're not getting paid to do this. In fact, we pay to do this, so it's really about drawing that line. And I think this past all season and year is the first year where I've actually treated bodybuilding like it's a hobby. Not saying that I'm not taking it serious, but I'm enjoying my life, living my life. I have never given myself so much freedom and flexibility until after I got my pro card and I kind of had this like big like, whoa, I need to have I need to be a person outside of bodybuilding. That doesn't make me less of a bodybuilder, but at the end of the day, I'm more than just a competitor who looks good on in a bikini on stage. But like this past year, I've truly just treated it like a hobby, and it's so funny that when you do that, you get more results and things are better. I I mean, I'm not saying I'm less dialed in, of course, you know, I'm following my plan, but you know, having extra meals with friends and family and just macro matching more and just being a human being and like I'm growing a lot more, I'm less stressed, I'm not like so worried about like, oh my god, am I gonna be big enough? Or I don't know if I'm doing this right. Like, I haven't had any of those thoughts. Like, I it's just been a lot better that way. And because I used to be one of those person people who ties their self-worth to how locked in they are, how on plan they are. Oh, you're not on plan, you don't want it bad enough, or you're not good enough, or you're not disciplined enough, and that's not the case at all. And I think too, one thing that helped me with that is realizing, and I know you're not supposed to copy other people, I wouldn't say I use it as I copied people, but just as inspiration. Like some of the top athletes, they literally have so much like lax in their off season. Some of them eat intuitively and don't even track, and they don't worry about it, they're not pressed about it, and look, they still show up to the Olympia, and it's not like I'm not saying everyone can just intuitively eat till prep, but like that's what it means it's okay to have balance and have meals with your family and to macro match and to cook things and to eat out, like it's okay to do those things. Um yeah, like it's it's okay, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 5:28

But I think I can tell like you've you have changed your attitude towards it, um, just in like the way that we talk and like the way like it's not do or die the whole world to you anymore. And so like I think you've done really well with that. Um I've also been trying to like balance it out a lot more. Um in my head, I'm trying to tell myself like that I'm not a competitor. Like I know I'm probably gonna compete again someday. Okay. But like I don't want to identify as a competitor or like even think I'm a competitor. Like I just want to be living this lifestyle. And so for me, I'm thinking of it more of like a life, like a lifestyle and um and just living a fit life. And like even like I was talking to some other moms at a practice the other day and we were talking about fitness and stuff, and I was like, I caught myself, I was like, oh yeah, I used to compete. And like I was like, oh yeah, I used to compete. Like I didn't say, oh, I compete. I said, yeah, I used to compete, or I, or I said something like that, or I competed in the past. Like I don't really want to identify as a competitor. And I and like this, like ever since I competed, and and it's I guess it's been about six months now. Um I gosh, I just lost my train of thought. Um I'm really just trying to like live a fit life and not think about the stage. That's what I wanted to say. Like, I'm not when I go into the gym, I'm not thinking about like, oh, I have to look like this on stage or I need to grow this body part so that it looks better on stage. I'm not thinking about that anymore. Um, like I'm just thinking about like, I want to go have a good workout, I want to push myself, I want to make progress, you know? And I'm I I can honestly say, like, I don't think about, I don't like fantasize in my head about the next time I get on stage, which for like I'm happy that I'm feeling that way.

SPEAKER_01 7:35

Yeah, and that's good because like it could happen, it could not happen, and you're okay very well okay with that because you just never know, and there's no guarantees with the sport. So um, do you think that competitors tie their self-worth to how lean they are?

SPEAKER_00 7:51

Um I mean, yeah, definitely a lot of yeah, for sure, a lot of people do. Um but then like I think about like last off season, I mean, I I gained a lot. Um I probably gained like 25 pounds, but like I liked the way I looked the entire time, even when I was at the peak of it. I've I really enjoyed the way I looked and it was like a different look, like I was like thick. It's like, oh, I haven't looked like this before. This is kind of cool, you know? So, but I think I think especially maybe like but I also that being said, I also really like to be on the leaner side as well, too. I think maybe like younger girls might fall into that trap a lot more where they really feel like if they're not lean with abs, then they're not good enough.

SPEAKER_01 8:53

Um and that's just people like you more. And it's like people like you more and you get more reach, and you're you're like people like your photos more and they talk to you more when you're lean. And I think that's a big thing. Like, of course, everyone likes you when you're lean. For example, there were so many more people following me and talking to me and watching my story when I was in prep last year. Like, man, the difference. When I was in Peak Week going to North Americans, I have never had I had like a hundred DMs. I mean, my phone was blowing up. Um, people that don't even talk to me, influencers and random people and random pros, like just talking to me, and I'm like, who are you people? And then now everyone's like ghosts, no one talks, and so it becomes a way of validation, I think, sometimes, and like, of course, everyone looks better when they're lean. So, yeah, I used I used to tell like in prep, I think you can't help but tie yourself worth to being lean because that's the whole point. But in like off-season, I truly don't care. I gained so much weight this past offseason, it was the best thing I could have ever done. Like, I mean, I gained a noticeable amount of weight. My parents have even said that. It's so funny. Um, and now all the weight is coming off, and they're like, we can definitely tell you're losing weight. I'm like, great. Um, but yeah, I think a lot of people do it because social media, and social media really ruins bodybuilding sometimes because it gives you these false expectations and false standards, and like you think that it matters, staying lean all year means you're gonna have like the best prep ever, and you're staying leaner because you have more muscle. And sometimes, like, maybe for some people that's the case, but not for everyone. Um, so there just I think a lot of people do tie self-worth to being lean.

SPEAKER_00 10:33

Yeah, but I guess let me ask you this what is to an extent, like I don't know that there's a problem with it. Like if to tie your self-worth to like a part of your self-worth to your physique. In the sense that like you worked really hard for this and you put in the work daily to look like this, like there is some kind of you know, self-accomplishment, confidence, and pride that should come with that. Like, yeah, um, not necessarily saying like you have to be super lean to feel that way, but like I said, like last year in my offseason, I mean, I was busting my ass. And like, yeah, I was 20, like I was 20 pounds up and like I was still, you know, felt good about the way I looked because I knew every single day I was working so hard. And um, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 11:28

I think confidence is different to like I guess it's a hard line, but I mean like literally hating yourself if you're not shredded and not wanting to post and not like you know, but yes, you should be confident and like love your physique and hey, I work for this, but there's like sometimes like people who like they won't post their physique because they're not lean. Like I straight up know people, like, oh, I can't post my physique, I'm not lean. Like, I can't post pump photos, I'm not leaner. One time I had a and I guess this is like an insult to me. I had a post, I guess, at one of my legs you could see more cellulite and you could see roles. And one girl's like, Wow, you posted that, and like you can visibly see your roles in cellulite. I was like, Yeah, I don't care. Thanks, girl.

SPEAKER_00 12:08

Okay, yeah. Like when you put so when you put it like that, I'm like, wow, yeah, that's crazy to not post it all because you don't feel lean or whatever. Because, like, especially if you're posting like a set, a working set, like you should be posting because like you just killed this set, you know. Um, and you shouldn't be ashamed to like have like a little extra body body fat on you. Uh, that's sad when like people are they don't even want to post because of the way that they, you know, think they look when they probably look really good still.

SPEAKER_01 12:42

Compared to the average person, that's kind of like it's funny because as bodybuilders, we're like, oh my god, like I'm fat now, I'm fluffy. Compared to the average person, you look great, you're still lean. When I was up 32 pounds, people are like, oh my god, I wish I had your legs. And I'm like, girl, there's a lot of fat on these legs. Um are there like certain compliments that you think affect you the most? I think um I I guess for me it's there's some compliments that I think that are like um affect me the most, or like, you know, you're not like I'm trying to think of one. There's once someone said to me that, like, wow, like, wow. It was like a compliment, but I feel like it was like a jab. They're like, you have gained a lot of weight this season and you've really held it well, like blah blah blah. Things like that. Like, I feel like that does affect me because I don't, of course, you don't want to be fat. I don't want to gain too much. There's obviously a balance between gaining weight and too much weight. So there are things that are triggers for me, and uh the compliments that I think are not really like compliments or things like that are like, oh, like, yeah, I see you didn't stay as lean this year. Things like that, like compliments and comments that can really trigger me. Like, I still get triggered, I'm not gonna lie. There's a lot of things that trigger me.

SPEAKER_00 13:57

Yeah, people people probably do say back-handed things like that just to get a reaction out of you. Honestly, I can't even think of anything off the top of my head. Um, but I'm sure that people have said it to me. They just don't really stick with me because I'm just like, okay, like whatever. I know how hard I'm working and I know I'm working harder than you probably. Uh, because it's usually, you know, somebody who isn't even, you know, trying. But but um I would say my favorite compliments to get are when people, when I'm in the gym and like people like see how hard I'm, you know, working out and giving a compliment on like my form or my execution or like how hard my effort is. But I also really like it whenever people ask me if I do CrossFit because I'm like, yeah, that means I'm like looking jacked.

SPEAKER_01 14:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:53

Awesome.

SPEAKER_01 14:56

Okay. I guess we can move into another topic. Okay. Oh, yes. This, I mean, I guess we kind of already talked about confidence versus validation in that last thing. Um okay, yes. Do you ever feel pressure from followers or friends or other bodybuilders to stay lean? Yeah, yeah, me either. I feel like I will be honest and say that I'm just this is honest. All of my bodybuilding friends, I hunt a hundred percent, I truly believe they stay leaner than I do, and that comes from a totally that comes from a lot of different things. Like also, my friends are taller, we distribute body fat differently, um, different goals, things like that. So I don't feel pressure because I feel like we're all in our own groove, and it's okay, but I think like a lot of younger girls or a lot of people that tie everything to social media definitely feel pressure, and I think that is why everyone is so obsessed with like I only gained three to five pounds this off season, like that's so good for me. Like, I put on so much muscle and I'm so ready to go, like things like that, or P I and I feel like you get that pressure and that false expectation from social media because like I remember um before I started this off season when I was uh and I quote told I only needed to gain like five to seven pounds for the muscle I need to grow, that was like not gonna be anything. I remember another wellness pro told me, and she still isn't, she's an Olympian and she competes every year, and she still said I still have to gain 15 to 20, sometimes 30 pounds every offseason to grow and to be healthy, or I she's like, or I truly will not stand with these girls. And this is someone who's gone to the Olympia three times. Yeah, really stuck with me. I was like, wow.

SPEAKER_00 16:47

So, you know, everyone Especially, yeah, especially being wellness, like you guys have to have a lot of muscle, you know, and and like 10 pounds on a MPC bikini girl is not the same as like gaining 10 pounds on a wellness girl. Like, you know, it's it's totally different. Um I would say, like, as far as like I don't feel pressured to look a certain way for anybody. Um, the way I want to look is coming from how I feel and like what I want for myself. Like I am staying leaner this time around, but that's because that's what I want to do. Um, and like I said in the past, I've gained more, and that was because that was what I wanted to do at the time. And I don't feel any kind of pressure from anywhere, but I also am not like some big influencer either. So I can see where, like, if your whole life is tied to social media, you know, you might feel a lot more of that. But that's where we have to disconnect and like realize social media is fake, it's not the real life, and you need to make sure you're feeling good about things, like not in real life and in real time before you can really like be on the internet.

SPEAKER_01 18:08

Um, yeah, and you have to that's why I don't believe everyone, but I mean everyone has their own choice. Everyone doesn't really need to be on social media because like you have to be able to have your own goals and confidence and like not care about what other people think or say, and if you put yourself out there, people are gonna have opinions. That's just the way that it goes, and there's so much like there's people what they post are the highlight reel and the good stuff. People are not posting the gut issues they're having and how bloated they are and all the weight they gained, and how how they feel not confident because they're 30, 40 pounds above stage, vice versa. Social media is a highlight reel. You have to remember that. Don't believe everything you see on the internet because it's just not true. No one is posting them being down bad, because like who wants to do that, you know? Um another thing, I guess, in is do you feel like people treat you differently in off-season impress? I feel like that's like a I don't think that's a real thing, okay? In my aunt now that I'm maturing in the sport, I used to think that. I swear to God, I used to be like, people only like me because I'm lean, and then when I'm not lean, they won't like me. No, that is just something I was had in my head, just didn't make any sense. Because like people that love you and want to be your friends and care about you, they could care less if you have abs or not. Me having abs doesn't make me less of a friend or more of a fiance, or it doesn't make you less of a mom. Your kids like, mom, you don't have abs, so I'm gonna be bad now. Like it doesn't, nobody really cares. And honestly, people in your life who are not bodybuilders, they probably prefer it when you have a little body fat on you, and when you're not in prep and you can eat things and do things, and when you're not irritable because you're not tired, you know what I mean? So they probably prefer that. I know for a fact my mom loves it when I'm not in prep, and we can like go at a happy hour or have a meal, or I'm not like, I gotta go, I gotta do cardio, I gotta do steps. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 20:05

Yeah, I would think more people in real life would enjoy it more when you're not in prep because you aren't just so self-focused all the time. Um, and you can put a lot more into all your other relationships. As far as like social media goes, I've never really cared about it either. I've always posted through my off seasons um because before I ever competed or even ever wanted to compete, I posted my fitness stuff just because I liked it. Like I like it, you know? And so I don't, it doesn't matter what you look like at that specific moment in time, like you can still enjoy fitness and share that love for it, regardless of what your pump picture looks like, you know, like people are still gonna like you, especially like, and yeah, maybe you won't get quite as many DMs or you know, messages on how you're looking insane because you're shredded. But like your core followers who they're gonna connect with you, you know, when you're posting through your off season and they're gonna see some something in you that they like about you. That's why they follow you in the first place, hopefully, unless they're a hater. Um and and they wanna keep up with you year round, you know? And they're not following you because you're shredded, they're following you because they're interested in your journey and they want to follow your journey or they want to be inspired by you. So hopefully, but there are haters out there too.

SPEAKER_01 21:42

That's where like sometimes people don't realize that bodybuilding can become less about building your body and it's more about trying to earn your worth. And that's not what the sport's about. And it's about literally building a physique that you built yourself that you're proud of. It's not About your self-worth being tied to this, and just because you're not as lean as these girls, and just because you're not as lean as you were last off season, or you would like to have abs, or I see all these things that'll be like the goal is tie-ins at 150. The goal is abs and tie-ins. Well, in my offseason, no, the goal is to build muscle, the goal is to build a better physique and to present a better physique than you presented last time. The goal is not keeping abs and tie-ins, of course. If you know, we all want to do that, like sure, right? But that's stop, we have to stop doing that and tying like our self-worth to how we look because it does not like it does not matter. Um, it really doesn't at the end of the day, and that's when bodybuilding be can become an unhealthy thing. When you're so like, oh yeah, I can't eat that food because then I'm gonna gain all this weight and my insulin sensitivity is gonna be off. I've been seeing a lot of that, and I don't know who started that crap, but you have to gain weight. You you have to, and I'm not saying everyone needs to gain 30, 40 pounds and just get huge, but you there's a you have to gain healthy weight back, especially if your goals are to get better, then you do have to gain weight, even if you want to stay on the leaner side, you can still gain a few pounds and still be lean. Like, understand that uh us being not lean is like shredded to the average person.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

Yeah, I was going back through, I've been going back through some photos, like because I'm archiving them all and like saving them. And I've been going through some from my last prep, and I'm like, oh my god, I was so lean. Like, you like you gotta get those goggles off because stage lean is a whole different level than like lifestyle lean. Like people tell me I'm lean right now. I'm like, no, like I was lean when I competed. I mean, like, yes, I am lifestyle lean right now. Okay, I will say that, like, I am leaner, but like stage lean is on a whole different level. Okay, you can't stay like that. It's not it's not a place you want to stay. Um and I think like getting like having some self-worth outside of that um really comes down to just like having a life outside of bodybuilding. Like for me, like bodybuilding and fitness is like a really fun outlet um that I get to enjoy and have like a little like a little piece that is just for me. Okay, like my fitness is for me. It's something that I do for myself. Um, but the rest of my life is typically doing things for everyone else in my life. And I'm not doing anything else for myself, really. Uh, so it's like something fun where I get to have this to focus. Like it's like a whole little different life outside of my family and mom life where I get to just do it for fun, right? Um, but then I have like a whole nother life that I I don't share a lot about just because I don't want to. Um I share some here and there, but um you guys know. Y'all have no idea like what I'm doing on the daily. Okay. Um my real life is my mom life. And I, you know, work my ass off every day, taking care of my kids, my family, my house, and and and being a daughter, being a, you know, a sister, and and being involved in the community, like volunteering, helping coach, you know, and I think having like you have to have a whole different life outside of this. It's fun to be focused on bodybuilding too. Like obviously it is a big part of my life, but you should also have all that other stuff. Like you should have something separate. Like you're a nurse, you have a whole nother life outside of this as well.

SPEAKER_01 25:58

Yeah, you have to have a life outside of bodybuilding. That's why I love when I'm seeing I'm people are like, you know, like busy moms who have, you know, they're like going to their kids' games and they're, you know, doing all the things, and then like people that are, you know, building their career, doing something outside of bodybuilding or something else. Because if you don't have anything else to keep yourself busy, of course you're gonna be insanely obsessed with this. And I get it when like social media is your job, but still, and that's when it becomes unhealthy. Like, people are always asking me why I'm posting less. It's because I am a coach, I'm a nurse, like I'm in school, I'm also a fiance, a sister, a daughter. Like, I have relationships to maintain, right? I have dogs, if you can't hear them in the background, and one of them is a puppy, and it takes a lot to take care of a puppy. You have to have to train it. It's like a it's yeah, it takes a lot. But I have so much going on, like, and I need to put that life first. Like, I can't just put everything else on the back burner for bodybuilding, and like it's it's it's selfish, and like and prep is a whole different story, but I still feel like you have to be available for your family and friends, and at the end of the day, the stage is gonna go away. Then what? I'm not like I'm I'm more than just a bodybuilder. I love it, it's my like hobby, and it's awesome, it's so fun, but I am I love being a nurse more. Um I love spending time with my family more. I think there's just things that I want a lot more, and bodybuilding is a hobby that brings me joy, but I my identity is not tied to it. For example, if I were to stop competing today, I'd be just fine because I have so many other things occupying me. Um, I I would not, you know, like I'd be okay. Like a lot of people, you take bodybuilding away, then what?

SPEAKER_00 27:46

Yeah, like you have to bodybuilding can take up as much of your life as you allow it to. It really can take over. And that's when, like I said before, like you have to check yourself and like draw that line and be like, no, this is too much. Like, I need to back off, like I need to have other things going on as well. Like, I can't, this can't be my entire life and identity. It can't be. Especially like I see it, I just feel like it happens a lot to like girls who get into this like in their early 20s and like really young. Like, cause those are like some very transformative years, but you're not even like a full adult yet. Like your brain isn't even like fully functioning until you're like 25. Like, I remember turning 25 and I was like totally different. I was like, oh wow, I'm like way more mature now. I can make better decisions. Um and and if you get sucked in like that, you might you might do some things like that you end up really regretting later on. So just try to keep it all in perspective. Like you're likely not ever gonna be Miss Olympia. Okay. So it is okay to really enjoy this, put a ton of effort into it, work really hard towards something, but you can also still be working hard towards other things as well at the same time.

SPEAKER_01 29:16

Yeah, I agree. I agree. There's enough room for everything, and it's a lot healthier when you do have that balance, even though there's all this social media talk that literally says F balance. I get like I do understand that you do have to be adherent to a plan, but that that is where it's becoming toxic. Like, what do you mean, fuck balance and fuck blah blah blah? And no, like you have to have a life outside of this. There's literally Olympians, they have a life outside of this. Like, I I see them in other countries living it up, and they have kids, and they're like, come on, like there is balance, is like a thing, there is such a thing as balance, regardless of what people want to say. Yeah, so yeah, I yeah, I just feel like bodybuilding can become toxic when you don't know who you are with that beyond a physique. And I encourage everyone to find a hobby. Um, I don't know, find something that you like that's not bodybuilding and give yourself that I'm sorry to say, sense of balance and find something else that you enjoy doing that brings you happiness, pour into other people in your life, pour into your family, your kids, your husband, your boyfriend, like whatever. Like find a hobby or other things that can make you happy so that this doesn't become a toxic thing and it doesn't take away the joy from it. That's why I feel like instead of me being burnt out from it, I still am fulfilled by it because I have other things in my life going on, and I'm not just like bodybuilding, bodybuilding, bodybuilding. Because it can easily become something toxic that you resent, and then you don't know who you are, you have no self-worth beyond your physique.

SPEAKER_00 30:48

Yeah, 100%. I couldn't agree more. This should be fun, and if if it doesn't feel fun to you, on like yeah, maybe every single day of prep isn't gonna be fun, but the majority of the entire thing should be fun. If you're not having fun, if you're not enjoying it on a daily basis, like something needs to change because you shouldn't be just like suffering through this because you feel like you have to or you're not worth anything if you don't. Um yeah, just you should be enjoying it.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

Yeah, it should never become something that you resent or hate. And that's why we preach about confidence and self-worth and knowing who you are and loving who you are beyond the stage because it is uh it is worth it. And like body image is a it's a really hard thing to maintain in being a bodybuilder because you know our identity is literally tied to our physique, but you can still be proud of your physique and love your physique in every stage that it's in. You know what I mean? And of course it's fun when you're leaner, everyone thinks that, right? Like, I think that when I'm leaner, I'm like, yay, like, thank God. But that's not like it's not my self-worth. Like, if I if I'm 30 pounds up, I'm I'm just as happy. Like, I don't know. I just have let go of caring about what my physique looks like because I know regardless, I have more muscle than the average woman, and I worked hard for this physique, so I'm happy about it, whatever like stage I'm in, because like a couple years ago I didn't look like this. I would if I could like somehow like clone myself and like go back in time, I would not believe that I would have as much muscle as I do now, and like that's the win, that's the flex. Like when I graduated college, I was like a string bean. Like I still had muscle and I was leaner, but I was tiny. I was like 110 pounds. Now I'm like, can barely get out of the 140s, have so much muscle. I feel so good about myself. I I don't care if I'm skinny, I don't, I eat cookies, things that I would have never eaten before. Like, I don't have to run off everything. Like just think about the growth that bodybuilding has given you and think about how much, you know, better you are because of it instead of thinking about, well, I'm not lean, so nothing matters.

SPEAKER_00 33:03

Yeah, I would put, I would say like I put a lot more of my like of course I enjoy the way that I look and I'm the same way. I didn't even know, like, I didn't even know like having a physique like this was like possible or like think things that that I didn't even know people looked like this, right? And like the fact that I look like this, like what? I would have never guessed. But I would say I put a lot more of my self-worth in my effort and um like just the effort and then like working hard, like that's where I put my self-worth in. And if I'm checking on my boxes and I'm working hard on the things that I want to work hard on, then like that's where your self-worth and confidence come from. Okay. It doesn't come from what you look like.

SPEAKER_01 33:51

Exactly, exactly. I could not agree more. Do you have anything else you want to touch on, or do you think you're good here? What do you think?

SPEAKER_00 33:59

Yeah, I think I think we covered a lot. I think this was this was good.

SPEAKER_01 34:03

Again, guys, just make sure that you're not tying your self-worth to your leanness or your physique. Be proud of the physique that you built. Um, and of course, it's good to have you know that confidence, but don't let your confidence or your light be dimmed just because you're not lean or you're not shredded anymore. Because, like, the scary part is sometimes when the abs go away, sometimes your confidence can go with it. So just like don't let it and don't let your whole identity be tied to bodybuilding. Pour into your family, pour into your friends, and find something else that makes you happy so that this stays something that you love and you enjoy and it does not become toxic. So, again, this was such a fun episode to just talk about identity crisis and finding yourself beyond the physique. We hope you guys enjoyed it. If there's anything else you want to hear, do let us know, and we hope you guys have a great week.