S1E4 "Surviving Morbidity & Building A Legacy Of Prevention"

What if the most powerful tool for safer births starts long before a positive test? We take a clear-eyed look at preventable maternal morbidity and map the path from awareness to action—spanning preconception choices, pregnancy care, and the often overlooked postpartum window. Through honest storytelling and practical guidance, we connect family language, partner health, and historical shifts in birth practices to the outcomes parents live with today.

We break down how hypertension, diabetes, and kidney disease intersect with fertility and pregnancy, why sperm quality and partner habits matter more than most people realize, and how terms like the pressure and the sugars can hide the urgency of real diagnoses. We also surface under-discussed risks—disability during pregnancy, autoimmune flares, seizures, and the rise in postpartum preeclampsia—while giving listeners a framework for better questions at every appointment. Advocacy sits at the center: using lived experience to demand clarity, counter bias, and secure accountability from systems that too often ignore marginalized families.

You’ll hear a deeply personal account of being labeled high risk without context, and how learning the language of care transformed fear into informed choice. We talk about rebuilding trust in the birthing process, honoring midwifery roots, and widening the circle by educating boys, men, and all genders whose decisions shape outcomes. The goal isn’t to simply survive birth—it’s to create a legacy of prevention, where knowledge, community, and accountability travel from one generation to the next.

If this conversation sparks something in you, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review. Your voice helps this community grow—and your questions could be the lifeline another parent is waiting for.

Chapters

• 0:14 Setting The Focus On Morbidity
• 1:53 Defining Morbidity Across The Journey
• 2:40 Partners’ Health And Pregnancy Outcomes
• 3:32 Generational Shifts In Birth And Care
• 8:40 Advocacy To Bridge Data And Lived Experience
• 10:49 Personal Story And The Power Of Information
• 12:39 Teaching Youth And Including All Genders
• 15:13 Beyond “High Risk”: Hidden Conditions
• 17:04 Pledge For Prevention And Community Action
• 19:18 Subscribe, Support, And Stay Connected

Transcript

Jaye Wilson: 0:14

Hey girl, hey, it's your girl Jaye. Welcome to another episode of Melinated Mommy Talks, the podcast, where we are talking about and exploring all things within the melinated moms spectrum. If you listened to our last two episodes, then you heard our chat with Jasmine Winters, a mom who experienced morbidity during her IVF pregnancy. If you're just joining us, then I highly recommend that you check those episodes out and catch up on this rich exploration of morbidity. I want to keep the conversation going and explore some other aspects of morbidity that our community experiences. Let's talk a bit about the ways and the resources available to cope and deal with morbidity and explore ways we can reduce it if we stay consistent enough in addressing it through advocacy and make enough change in the world, maybe even getting it close to non existent. And by that, I mean eliminating the morbidities that are actually preventable. So go ahead and pull up your metaphorical seat, tap in, and enjoy this episode focused on morbidity and maternal health. Okay, let's get started with this journey that we have been on to eradicate preventable morbidities. What are the different morbidities in the birthing process that are most impacting the black community. And out of these, which ones are preventable? So, generally speaking, morbidity is defined as a chronic disease or ailment that can impact the process of birth or postpartum. In Melinated Mommy Talks, our support group, we talk about different chronic diseases and the way that it impacts our whole journey to motherhood. What we don't typically land on is what we did before the pregnancy tests was positive. If we don't know, the way that we take care of ourselves actually can add to our risk of having morbidity during our pregnancy, we're actually putting ourselves at a higher risk. This also includes our fathers, the fathers of our children. So just as we want our moms to have a healthy diet and go to all of her appointments and take her prenatal vitamins and folic acid, we have to also have the same conversation with our partners so that they understand their sperm quality, their living habits, and their dietary restrictions or non-restrictions actually do contribute to higher rates of miscarriage, birth abnormalities, and even pre-eclampsia. For me, when I was having my children, I had no idea about any of these statistics, even as a nurse. So learning these things post-children, because I am totally done there, makes me wonder: could I have had this conversation with my partner and would it have made a big difference in my losses or me being a four-time survivor of pre-eclampsia? Now, morbidity does not just exist through the pregnancy period. It can happen at any point in the phases of conception. So that's preconception when you're trying to conceive or having fun practicing, obviously during the pregnancy, postpartum, or interconception, which is between each pregnancy. Also being aware of the way language internally with your family and friends can shift your priority in taking care of yourself ahead of time, that can actually take away our ability to be more preventable. There is a difference between awareness versus commonality and words, as well as cultural influence and the way that we recognize what diseases can contribute to the success of a pregnancy. I know you all heard of things like they got the pressure, they got the sugars, but we not realizing that those are actual diagnoses. And instead of normalizing it as if it's something to expect, we can actually open up good dialogue with our friends and our family so that we know how it will affect the health of that pregnancy. We're also seeing a huge increase in more moms who are, or more women, excuse me, who are pursuing pregnancy later in life or who have these pre-existing co-morbidities and are having or experiencing infertility issues. So because we have seen this big shift, we should definitely be having these conversations now. Pregnancy is not one of those things that you only want to be reactionary to. It's always a good idea, whether you're pregnant or not to practice prevention, because that is the way that you prepare for what ifs. I remember having conversations with my grandmother. It's the lady that raised me. You're going to always hear me talk about a nana-ism. And I remember the first time I got pregnant and asking her like, "Nana, how was it when you got pregnant and all of the fun things that went into that?" And she looked at me like, "Girl, I don't remember that." And while her pregnancy choices and her access may have looked very different from what mines were, the process of pregnancy, the supportive networks, and also the knowledge of our family's history were still the same. What we didn't realize, or what I didn't realize in the moment is, we were actually passing down generational disinformation. I'm asking questions that no one ever asked her. I'm paying attention to parts of how my pregnancy was progressing that no one ever expressed with her. So even if she had a good answer, because it was never addressed when she was in that moment, she may not have thought it was significant. And that's why it's so important for us to shift away from that space of reactionary planning to preventative planning. Seeing how that can support a successful pregnancy shifts the way that we can honor the birthing process and stop thinking of it as just a procedure. This whole shift actually can go all the way back to the way that we even conceptualize where we give birth. Before 1950, more than 80% of births were actually given in the home. They were attended by midwives, there were doulas, it was a process. You were allowed to eat and move around and allow your body to open up and complete the process. But when we saw that shift from home births and a midwifery model to going into the hospital, having birth processes change into interventions, it took away from our ability to trust our bodies to go through this natural process. We also saw how that shifted the way that data sets actually told the story of what is a safe or risky birth. So when we have these conversations around the generational aspect of pregnancy, birth, and beyond, my grandmother, my lovely Nana, was in that change. So when she had her first baby, it was 1955. She gave me a whole aspect of what it was like to be in a room with 30 other women all lined up, giving birth, and one doctor going from one room or one person to another, and how that actually shifted what she thought the birthing experience should be. I couldn't imagine being in a room with 29 other people and just hoping for the best. Do you know how traumatic that sounds like? So to know that she lived through that and her children came into the world that way, I can totally understand why that wasn't a conversation that she wanted to have. But this is why it's so important for us to think about advocacy as a means to address where and how morbidity shows up in the way that we honor the birthing process. Advocacy helps us to tell that story between what the data set metrics are and what the delivery outcomes can be. This is also an opportunity for us to help moms who've been through these birth traumas or in these vulnerable spaces and not knowing what to do with their experience because no one ever gave them access to know it's safe to say these things out loud. So advocacy helps us to hold all parties that are a part of that birthing process accountable for the outcomes, not justifying it based on being marginalized or what insurance you have or even what you look like. We want to make room for those voices that weren't heard in the moment because we also don't want that morbidity to turn into a mortality. If you think about it from the space of, let's go with diabetes, if you are not pregnant, but you go to your doctor and they do, they do your A1C, just to throw it out there. Sorry, I'm a nurse. It is what it is. And they tell you, you're actually pre-diabetic. Here are the numbers, here's the reasons why we are saying diagnostically, you may experience diabetes. If you are in that child birthing age range of 14 to 45, you are at a higher risk of having a short-term or long-term impact on your pregnancy and postpartum. Now, going into my pregnancies, I was never given the opportunity to see the connection between my own chronic illness and how that would impact my reproductive journey. When I was 17, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure and a kidney disease. And when I became pregnant the first time at 19, no doctor ever explained that to me. In my first appointment, my confirmation, the doctor told me, you have pre-eclampsia and this baby's gonna kill you. Make a decision. Was never given any additional information. I had no idea, I've never even heard the term pre-eclampsia. So now I'm scared, informationless, and I have to make a quick decision because the way the doctor gave it to me, this is life or death. I can reflect on it now because I have the information and I know how powerful having that can be. But I want to, I want to share my experience because I want you to learn from what I didn't know and what wasn't available to me. So you'll always hear me say, find a resource, be a resource. So when I think about finding resources, it's not just words on a paper or a peer-reviewed article or evidence-based data points. It's the humanity behind it. It's being able to reflect in these moments and saying, "This is what I didn't know, but now I do." And here's, here are the other pathways so that you can know what you need to know too. Sometimes the resource is just being able to ask a better question. How can I find support for this diagnosis? What aspects of pre-diagnosis or a family history can actually impact my reproductive journey? And also don't be afraid to tell your medical provider, you not give me an answer doesn't work for me. That is a form of advocacy. Remember, being preventative is always the key. That is the way that we're going to unlock the way that we take care of ourselves and create a better legacy for our children. You know, I have two children and I think of them now going into their next phase of life. And while I don't want them to think about pregnancy and parenting right now, because of their age, I do know that it's on the table. I remember being in high school and having more than one pregnant classmate and them not even being able to recognize what the process was of how they got there or how that baby was going to come out. If I don't do anything else, I'm going to have those conversations with those kids. I encourage you to not stand in that fear of the what-ifs or how can I? Or am I encouraging them to do something that I don't want them to do? And realize that having the information is so much more powerful than not having it at all. I also think that it is important for us to have this conversation across gender identities. Women and young girls should not be the only ones that are equipped with this information. It's usually two people that are involved in having sex to make a person. So both of them are just as responsible for making, providing, and maintaining the support and resources that are necessary for that pregnancy to turn into a person. So I'm challenging you to have these conversations with your boys, with your sons, with your husbands, with your uncles, with anybody that has a penis, because they do have the say-so in being a part of this journey too. They also need to know that morbidity is not a one-sided thing. So when I think about what does it look like to create a world where we can actually be preventative, I think it just looks so beautiful and melanated. I think it looks like the way that we create longevity from within. I think, I think of all the things that I've taught my children over these years. And the most important thing I always want them to hold on to is the legacy I'm building. I know that my children may pick parenthood at some point in their life. And it's always cute to think about, oh, the baby's gonna have this hair and look like this and have your nose. But I want my kids to pass on knowledge. I want them to pass on why they're here and why their partner also is a part of that journey. That is really what good preventative perinatal health looks like. I want to go back a little bit. You know, I love using myself as an example because I'd have been through some shit. So I think there's so many lessons I was able to learn that I had no idea were lessons in the moment. I think when people hear the term morbidity in the context that it's usually given to us, they may hear high-risk pregnancy as just a blanketed statement. The most common forms of the diagnosis for a high-risk pregnancy is usually high blood pressure, diabetes or gestational diabetes, or anemia. There are some not so common things that also can happen that influence morbidity in pregnancy and honestly postpartum. One big one is disability during pregnancy. Whether you walked into that pregnancy with some type of disability or you experienced something in the moment, using myself as an example, I remember being pregnant with my oldest daughter and being in my last prenatal appointment and literally going blind in my left eye. No one told me that that was a symptom or a possibility during pregnancy. That was definitely not on my bingo card. I'm grateful that it came back, but that's not always the case. Not always a story for other moms. There's also the form or the exacerbation of autoimmune diseases, seizures, and other really significant health issues that can actually last after the baby is born. Even the diagnosis of pre-eclampsia. Until about 10 years ago, the official cure for pre-eclampsia was birth. But we've been seeing such a huge increase in the last five years or so of postpartum pre-eclampsia. So now we are understanding pre-eclampsia is not a monolith, but it is a morbidity. I'm asking you to learn about these things, to be a part of these conversations, to invite your friends and your family to talk through the experiences that they've had and not be fearful of it. It should not be okay to say, "My pregnancy was great because I survived it." You're supposed to survive it. But because we know mortality and morbidity has such a high prevalence, especially in communities of color, we need to take more time to be responsible and we need to be more receptive on how to be preventative and not just reactionary when or if we receive these diagnoses. And this is where I want to invite you to take this pledge with me. I pledge to hold more safe spaces to include partners in these types of conversations about morbidity, responsibility. I pledge to use my story as my why for continuing to do this work. And I pledge to empower my children's journey through my lived experience because I know how important it is to live through a morbidity as opposed to be remembered through my mortality. I hope this episode was as fruitful for you as it was for me to share. I think it's important to share from my lived experience because I want you to know I'm a part of the same community that I've been building since 2017. Melinated Mommy Talks, the podcast, is your place for authentic and raw conversations about what it means to be a melanated mom. So make sure to subscribe to all of the platforms where you listen to your favorite podcast. Make sure to like and share. And if you want to continue to see our podcast grow, make sure to become a paid subscriber for exclusive bonus content or become a donating listening supporter. If you're interested in becoming an individual or corporate sponsor of this podcast, go to melinated moms. com/ podcast for more information. We can't wait to have you with us in our next episode. So keep listening, stay connected, and stay tapped in.