OGYN #36 Pump It down

SHARE the laughs with friends. Thank you to everyone listening, we are greatful. We sat down for a quick one to have some laughs this week. More interesting and funny guests coming on soon. 

In this episode Joe and Michelle call Izzy and check in on him. Joe and Michelle talk and joke about all sorts of things including music and pirates.

     Joe and Izzy chop it up and tackle all the tough issues with comedy. Live Show tix joespaincomedy.com 

Thank you to everyone who laughs with us. Please Like, Share and comment to keep us improving. Spread the laughter. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:32

This is the number one song with Apple Mister. What do you think of that? I don't like it neither. I heard he got big dong, though.

SPEAKER_00 0:48

Probably. Probably. He got big dong energy for sure. He's a kitty diddler, so.

SPEAKER_04 0:56

He got big dick energy, and he be putting it in though, boys.

SPEAKER_00 0:59

That's what they end on the screen.

SPEAKER_04 1:01

Man, you can't be talking smack on Drake. They'll come for you. All the hate us. This is number 36.

SPEAKER_00 1:12

You believe that? That's that's good.

SPEAKER_04 1:14

36, man. That's half a year plus ten. Quick maths.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Half a year plus ten.

SPEAKER_04 1:22

Yeah, half a year is 26 weeks.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Oh, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_04 1:33

Oh man, we just had some um what are them things called?

SPEAKER_00 1:38

Mandarin oranges.

SPEAKER_04 1:39

Mandarin oranges. And this little thing they come with.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

Little sp little baby spork that's attached to the underside of the lid.

SPEAKER_04 1:48

It's a sport, but it's like sharp.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Joe was quite amazed.

SPEAKER_04 1:52

Yeah, man. This motherfucker's sharp.

SPEAKER_00 1:53

It's a mini, um, what do you call it? Spork. No.

SPEAKER_04 1:57

A devil horn thing. A devil thing.

SPEAKER_00 2:00

Trident trident.

SPEAKER_04 2:01

Trident, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Mini trident.

SPEAKER_04 2:03

The first one you gave me, you stabbed me in my lip. That's why that's why I know it's sharp.

SPEAKER_00 2:10

My bad.

SPEAKER_04 2:11

What else we got on birthday? What else we got on top 10? You know this one? Man, we're getting all kinds of. I'm glad I don't make no money from this. I'll make no money from this. Come after nothing.

SPEAKER_02 2:24

My friends are smelling.

SPEAKER_04 2:27

Guess what? 10% of nothing is still nothing. This is uh Olivia Rodrigo. Okay. It's called the Stupid Song. So I don't have to go far to say it's fucking stupid. Stupid song. Just kidding. It could be wonderful. I didn't really give it a chance. I got yelled at today.

SPEAKER_00 2:47

Why? By whom?

SPEAKER_04 2:49

A whole bunch of people, man. I had a uh Did I do something wrong? Something No.

SPEAKER_00 2:54

I was just trying to. Can you hear me that?

SPEAKER_04 2:56

Oh no.

SPEAKER_00 2:57

My bad.

SPEAKER_04 2:58

Robo Dick.

SPEAKER_00 2:59

I didn't sh listen. I didn't mean to interrupt you. You got yelled at today by whom?

SPEAKER_04 3:03

A bunch of people got mad at me.

SPEAKER_00 3:05

On Instagram.

SPEAKER_04 3:06

Yeah, won't lie.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

That's not unusual.

SPEAKER_04 3:09

I kind of I kind of dig it though. I think it's kind of funny. Because people just get upset. I try to post and ghost, but today, today, the heat came so quick that I hadn't even ghosted yet. I was still posting. I was doing other shit. Like I posted about this one. It was the um, so from the Freedom 250, the Josh Hokett fucking comment about Michelle Obama being a man.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 3:40

Which was, I mean, come on, man. Unless there's evidence that she's a man, there's no reason for anyone to get mad about just fucking throwing out there Michelle Obama's a man. I mean, come on, man. Whatever. This one lady said, uh, she told me, she said, Well, if that was your mom.

SPEAKER_00 4:00

Whatever. I don't care. That doesn't have anything to do with it. I don't, to me, the the issue isn't specifically, you know, what like, oh, is she a man or not? No, who cares? Whatever. Like your point. My thing is, is that it's just classless. And I, you know, you and I already had this. You and I always have this. I've already had this conversation.

SPEAKER_04 4:22

But the stick is to be ridiculous and classless and over the top, and that's not even who he is. He's selling fucking tickets. So he couldn't even hold it in. He couldn't even hold the laughter in when he fucking said it. Everyone was laughing. I think that's the it's so ridiculous for the people to come at me like, you know, the strong black woman thing. Give me a fucking break. Give me a break. So I responded. I says, actually, if you want to know what I really think, I think she's attractive. Does that make me gay? I don't think it does. I think Michelle Obama's attractive. There's certain pictures of Michelle where she be looking good. Right or wrong.

SPEAKER_00 5:07

I mean, whatever. Like, that's a personal, you know what I mean? I think she's a pretty lady. Yeah. I I think that she's attractive, but that's not a matter of opinion.

SPEAKER_04 5:18

Lil Dickie said he he's gonna bend her over.

unknown 5:20

Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 5:21

He did. Little Dickey did. Nobody got mad about that. He was talking about Mr. bending over Obama. He's an America sweetheart. Not really, but he's Jewish. So you know. There's only so much you can push back there. Man, this is a cool Pepsi.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

They're mighty fine.

SPEAKER_04 5:46

Yeah, they are. Speaking of Jewish fellows, my boy, I saw my uh my boy Zachwagel is doing a Juneteenth show. And I cannot wait to see him later. Just so I can, you know, attack all the angles of that. That could be funny. We'll take some swings and see what happens, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 6:08

Right. Alright, so So where are you gonna see him later?

SPEAKER_04 6:13

Uh probably Motor House.

SPEAKER_00 6:17

Then what are you going there for?

SPEAKER_04 6:19

Are you interviewing me?

SPEAKER_00 6:22

I was just trying to make it more interesting while you were looking at your phone.

SPEAKER_04 6:25

I'm actually getting ready to call Izzy.

SPEAKER_00 6:28

Oh, okay, cool.

SPEAKER_04 6:29

Yeah. Uh I want to see what he's doing. He doesn't know we're calling him, so this could go any old kind of way. I might not even tell him he's on the he's on the podcast. He probably won't answer, tell your truth. I think last year.

SPEAKER_02 6:45

The person you're trying to reach is not available.

SPEAKER_00 6:47

How do you put that through there?

SPEAKER_04 6:49

I like magic.

SPEAKER_00 6:50

Oh okay.

SPEAKER_04 6:51

Alakazamakazoo.

SPEAKER_00 6:52

That makes me happy. I like magic.

SPEAKER_04 6:56

I got cards in my pocket.

SPEAKER_00 6:59

Oh, yeah?

SPEAKER_04 7:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:02

Does one of them have a heart on it?

SPEAKER_04 7:04

Mm-hmm. They all do for you, baby.

SPEAKER_02 7:06

How about some space? Or did it be voicemail? The person you're trying to reach is not available. At the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording, you may hang up with the show.

SPEAKER_04 7:16

Hey, yo, you in the shower? You in the shower? You better be doing something.

SPEAKER_00 7:21

Eeyore, what are you doing? Are you working?

SPEAKER_04 7:24

We had to record a podcast, man. I didn't even know what day it was. I forgot to count the rotations of the sun and the earth. So I was like, man, I think it's been enough moons to where it's time to record another podcast. But you wouldn't know that. Hey, buddy.

SPEAKER_00 7:46

He forgot to count the moons.

SPEAKER_04 7:48

I love you, man. Call me back.

SPEAKER_00 7:50

We love y'all.

SPEAKER_04 7:52

Alright. There goes Izzy.

unknown 7:55

Man.

SPEAKER_04 7:56

He'll call me back. Or he won't. So just putting it out there, man. Um, if anybody actually, I'm gonna put this right out. It did his Wednesday about 6 o'clock, so that's cutting it tight. But if you're in Ocean City and you happen to be just listening to this, this pops up on your phone and you say, Oh, the OGYN guys, in this case, gal and guy. Put out a podcast today. Maybe I'll check it out. And you turn it on and you hear this in the first 10 minutes. In Ocean City, Maryland, there's a drunken stoner show tonight that it's gonna be fun. There's supposed to be a whole bunch of people there. He asked me to go down there, but I don't have anywhere to sleep within like two hours of Ocean City right now. So I'm going to Baltimore because 20 minutes from Baltimore, I have a shower and a toilet.

SPEAKER_00 8:45

And a bed.

SPEAKER_04 8:46

And a bed. We did sneaky sacks last night. Didn't we? Yep. Sneaky sacks. That fucking bed, yo, is like you can't even move a muscle on that bitch. We like had to like had to like put it in and like just rest on top, just mash around a little bit. Just mash around a little bit. But it was weird because I had to do it so little and it tickled and it made me blow off real quick. It was fucking great, man.

SPEAKER_00 9:23

All true stories. This is not just from copying, y'all.

SPEAKER_04 9:27

Hey, you got you gotta you people don't know what is true and what ain't. What a quickness. With a quickness. I should have studied in here. But but I yeah, took about a hundred more, two hundred more strokes. Nice and slow and quiet while my face was in the pillow. That's what she does to me. She puts my face in the pillow. What have you been listening to, baby? What's been in your uh rotation lately in your car? Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't introduce you. It's Michelle. All those people that listen, and maybe this is the first one that you listen to. This is my wife, Michelle Spain. Usually I have a co-host. His name is Isaiah Tingle. He's a funny guy, but he's not here right now. He usually gives me I know. He usually gives me the ability to say even rougher things because I just run it by him.

unknown 10:20

Bow.

SPEAKER_00 10:20

And he don't give a fuck. He don't give a fuck. No, Spain. That's funny.

SPEAKER_04 10:26

You should try that. He's actually got me in trouble doing that a couple times.

SPEAKER_00 10:29

Yeah, I believe it.

SPEAKER_04 10:30

Fuck him. So what's in your what's in your uh radio these days, radio? Your your CD player.

SPEAKER_00 10:38

Um sound like Renee.

SPEAKER_04 10:43

You got them got them 10 disc changer behind your seat. What do you got loaded in there this week?

SPEAKER_00 10:49

Um, so on my Apple music. Actually, today all day, almost every time I was in my car, I was listening to uh Megan the Stallion.

SPEAKER_04 10:56

Really?

SPEAKER_00 10:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:58

That's cool. And because you got you saw her on that thing and it made you want to see her.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Um actually, no, which is kind of funny that you say that because you would think that was the case. Because the uh Tony Awards uh opening number with pigs. Oh my god. All the people, including Megan the Stallion, um, which was frickin' phenomenal.

SPEAKER_04 11:19

Um I don't mean to interrupt you. No, you but oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 11:23

I know, right?

SPEAKER_04 11:24

Oh my god. I know opening to the fucking Tonies was amazing. If you have not seen that, I don't care what kind of music you're into, if you're into theater, I don't it doesn't matter. The the production of that and the fucking choreography and the singing, even the bad singing was good. Right. You know what I mean? Like it was fucking amazing, man. I'm glad you sent me that. Thank you. Go ahead. Sorry.

SPEAKER_00 11:48

You're welcome. Um, yes, so the other day Joseph and I were having a conversation, and you know how things happen, like no matter what is going on, there's always some sort of like musical or music reference to this or that, and one of us starts singing, you do the same thing. And so I one of the two of us sang the opening to the the song Savage. It was me.

SPEAKER_04 12:11

And Savage is what that pink song is called.

SPEAKER_00 12:14

No, no, no, no, no. That's a Megan the Stallion song. It's probably her most famous song. Oh, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 12:18

I know, yeah. Yeah, bitch itch, bitch itch, cabbage. That that song, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

That song sort of. Um, and I said, What whoever, which one of one of them? I said Megan the Stallion, and he said, No, that's Lizzo. And I said, No, sir, that is Megan the Stallion. And it's the opening to like one of her songs, you know, saying, and um so anyway, we parted ways, whatever. He went somewhere, I went somewhere, and then I looked it up because I was like, I'm then he made me question myself. Well, because he's young and has a better memory than I do and loves music and and you know, all the things. So I was like, let me check. So I you know opened my iPad.

SPEAKER_04 13:02

Plus it could have been a remake, it could have been a Megan Stallion song that Lizzo redid, or something, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 13:08

Maybe, but probably not, but that, but anyway, goofball. So I yeah, I played that song and I was like, Yeah, that's what I thought. So then I sent it to him. So it was still up on my Apple Music from that.

SPEAKER_04 13:23

So it like built a channel around it?

SPEAKER_00 13:25

No, no, no, no. It was just still up, it was it was the last thing that I had listened to.

SPEAKER_04 13:29

Oh, that's what I mean. But what are you listening to? That's one. I'm saying, what else have you been listening to? What's in your dish changer? What's in your tape case that lives on your backseat and just gets stepped on and the broken all the time?

SPEAKER_00 13:43

As you know, um, I mostly am one of the very few people that still listens to the actual radio.

SPEAKER_03 13:51

Egg crates?

SPEAKER_00 13:51

You got egg crates with albums and yes, I do. Um, terrestrial radio. Uh-huh. And I always listen to 101.9. So you whatever they're playing is what I'm listening to typically when I'm in my car.

SPEAKER_04 14:03

So what is it? What kind of shit are you is it? What have you been jamming out to?

SPEAKER_00 14:06

I mean, they play a wide variety of things. Everything from, you know, 80s, 90s up until like more current music.

SPEAKER_04 14:14

Do you okay? I'm gonna have to show you something. There's like a couple people listen to this.

SPEAKER_00 14:19

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 14:19

That don't live in Maryland.

SPEAKER_00 14:23

So they don't know what music the average radio station plays?

SPEAKER_04 14:26

No, exactly. What's 101.9? I just told you it's 80s, 90s, what? Pop? Hip hop?

SPEAKER_00 14:34

Like radio music, yes.

SPEAKER_04 14:36

Yeah, well, that's another thing, baby.

SPEAKER_00 14:38

It is a thing.

SPEAKER_04 14:39

You're talking about like Mix 106?

SPEAKER_00 14:42

It's any average radio music from the 80s to now.

SPEAKER_04 14:46

So what was on the radio?

SPEAKER_00 14:48

Is what they play on most station. Sure. They've been playing a ton of Michael Jackson recently. Because of the movie. Because the movie just came out.

SPEAKER_04 14:56

Did you seen it?

SPEAKER_00 14:56

Did you know that like right now, like 10 of his songs are in the top 100?

SPEAKER_04 15:02

No.

SPEAKER_00 15:02

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 15:03

Man. I wonder who's getting that thing.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

This is wild when you think about it. He's getting that dough. I don't know. I hope it's children.

SPEAKER_04 15:10

He got children? Hell yeah. I thought he was uh didn't have a penis.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

No. That is that was a false rumor.

SPEAKER_04 15:18

I thought I thought he was uh castrated.

SPEAKER_03 15:21

Nope.

SPEAKER_04 15:21

He was uh no, that ain't right.

SPEAKER_03 15:24

No, he's got biological children? He does.

SPEAKER_04 15:26

With Elvis Presley daughter?

SPEAKER_03 15:28

No.

SPEAKER_04 15:29

Where'd I hear that?

SPEAKER_00 15:30

Um, I don't know. Probably the same place you heard he's castrated. I don't know. Fucking TMZ. I have no idea.

SPEAKER_04 15:43

What's his children is? He got boys or girls.

SPEAKER_00 15:46

Um, I just looked this up the other day.

SPEAKER_04 15:48

Now, you don't want I want you to I want you to tell me.

SPEAKER_00 15:51

Uh well their names are You ain't got too many names.

SPEAKER_04 15:53

How many got?

SPEAKER_00 15:54

He got three. Three? Yes. One of them is surrogate mom that nobody knows her name.

SPEAKER_04 15:59

Uh-uh.

SPEAKER_00 16:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 16:01

They can't find her?

SPEAKER_00 16:03

No, they know it's known who she is, but she chooses to remain anonymous.

SPEAKER_04 16:07

Oh. She don't want the money or nothing.

SPEAKER_00 16:12

I that I can't answer. I'm guessing no, if she chooses to remain anonymous.

SPEAKER_04 16:17

But they're getting a whole nother round of money. Look, Michael Jackson got all the money. He was talented, he deserved it. Then he dies. And then they make a hologram and they get another round of money. Right? And then they release another album and they get another round of money. And now they got this movie and they're getting another round of money. I think the bitch that had the kids should get a dollar or two.

SPEAKER_00 16:41

I mean, if she says no thanks, that's up to her.

SPEAKER_04 16:43

Yeah, I guess you're right. It's not like they're keeping it from her.

SPEAKER_00 16:47

I mean, who knows what that situation is. God knows. You're right. Rich people are crazy and weird and have all the money, so they can do whatever the fuck they want.

SPEAKER_04 16:54

She might live in a cave with like a candle in the corner and a little troll.

SPEAKER_00 16:59

Oh, yeah. Who the fuck knows? Right. Right.

SPEAKER_04 17:01

Like the Chinese.

SPEAKER_00 17:04

Whatever that means. Like the Epstein files.

SPEAKER_04 17:10

Oh, there we are. I think uh Epstein is living in Florida.

SPEAKER_00 17:15

You do?

SPEAKER_04 17:16

No.

SPEAKER_00 17:18

I just fucking like saying dumb shit. Dumb shit.

SPEAKER_04 17:22

I had something I wanted to show. I had something I want to show you. Speaking of the news, we might as well. Alright. So there have been pirates. Somali pirates that are getting kind of desperate. So they're trying to get cruise ships. Look at these poor bastards. There is a video of one, two, three, four wooden boats that looks like it's two or three people. Can you see it? Okay.

SPEAKER_00 17:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 17:50

I know that people can't see it that are listening, but there's four these four wood boats that are probably. I would declare that they're rowboats. You think that's a rowboat?

SPEAKER_00 18:01

I mean, it's a big ass rowboat, but there certainly isn't any motors on those things.

SPEAKER_04 18:06

Okay, so it's a big rowboat, but it's a small boat far as boats go, right?

SPEAKER_00 18:10

Oh yeah. Maybe I mean they look miniature, they look like small calling. Smaller than tugboats, yes for the cruise ship.

SPEAKER_04 18:18

Hey, buddy. Hey.

SPEAKER_07 18:23

Welcome to the podcast, Isaiah Tango.

SPEAKER_04 18:34

Hey, man.

SPEAKER_05 18:36

Chilling on, man.

SPEAKER_04 18:37

I miss you, buddy.

SPEAKER_05 18:39

Miss you too, man.

SPEAKER_04 18:40

Had you got your truck fixed yet? No, not at all. And I I thought of a couple things we could do. What? So I know some people, and they're small. Okay. I don't want to say any names, but they're small, and they're brown skinned, and they speak a different language. Maybe a couple of them could get drunk and run into your truck in your driveway and maybe have gasoline on and blow the fucking thing up, and then we call the insurance company.

SPEAKER_05 19:18

My insurance isn't that great, so they probably just pay it off, and then I'd be at, you know, wherever I'm at.

unknown 19:25

I thought I had it figured out.

SPEAKER_00 19:26

Maybe one of those Hispanic people could figure out how to fix it.

SPEAKER_04 19:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:32

Maybe there's a cheaper price than taking it to a boy.

SPEAKER_04 19:44

Ermino.

SPEAKER_05 19:45

See? Maybe it's just a computer part, really. I think it's a computer part. It's just expensive.

SPEAKER_04 19:51

Well, you you can't get one from the Chinese.

SPEAKER_05 19:56

I mean, I'm sure I could. You know people. I do. Everywhere I called around, they just, you know what I mean? They give me like the runaround, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 20:10

How about the uh at the um flea market, man? There's gotta be some shady chips around the flea market.

unknown 20:17

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_05 20:18

Oh no, I didn't know they fixed cars out of there. No, just because it's diesel. So, you know what I mean? I gotta be careful where I take it so that I get fucked up worse. You never been in the basement of the flea market? Nah, man, cannot say.

SPEAKER_00 20:37

Oh Joe has.

SPEAKER_04 20:39

Oh yeah. Man, um, I just put the phone by my balls when you called. Oh man. Yeah, it was on vibrate. No, it's good. It's good.

SPEAKER_00 20:47

Yeah, you should be saying you're welcome.

SPEAKER_04 20:50

Hey, did you uh we were talking about these Somali you see them Somalis and them little teeny boats trying to get on them great big boats? Not any of that was going on. Yeah, well, it keeps going on, but now they're trying to get on cruise ships, man, and it looks like you know, it's like taking a shit in a pool as opposed to in a toilet, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_05 21:13

You're not covering very much ground.

SPEAKER_04 21:16

These little teeny boats can't even get up on them. I don't know what they're doing, you know. Did you go uh did you go up Monday?

SPEAKER_05 21:24

Yeah, I went up first. Uh eight shit. Well, I didn't eat shit. It shouldn't be well. It better last uh last time I came out. That's what's uh yeah, it was all right. You guys should uh it wasn't a lot of people, but like it wasn't no, not on the list. Like it only went up like 13, but I left early. I left I went number one that I left. Oh, that's what's up. That's real tripper of you. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:56

Stoner was trying to find a couple uh people to come down tonight.

SPEAKER_05 22:02

Yeah, I heard Zach was telling me about it. Zach's on the table, but uh he ended up having to work. Oh, he's working? Yeah, he works tonight. Uh I think that he's off either tomorrow and Friday or uh Friday and Saturday. Cause he's taking me up uh to do Christmas show after this. That's right.

SPEAKER_04 22:23

I was just gonna bring that up, man. So you're working, you're working it's Saturday or Friday? Uh Saturday, I believe. It's the 20th, right? Yep, Saturday and the 20th, yeah. That's Michelle's birthday. Oh shucks. Yeah. What are y'all doing for uh for it? Actually, as that Saturday, we'll be here. We'll be in Denton. We'll actually be back that day we come back. Okay, what are you going for? Yeah, I've been staying up my dad's round B more. Oh shit. How's that been? I mean, it's alright. You know what I'm saying? Get to see Pops for a little while. Me and and you know, Joseph. Joseph's got my truck right now. You know what he's doing. Getting ass.

SPEAKER_05 23:14

Yeah, it doesn't stop. Probably more ass like deprived, you're saying that he's really hunting.

SPEAKER_04 23:23

Yeah, so I only stopped. Actually, we're in Denton right now just to record this, and then I'm going back up. I'm gonna try to get a set set or two in tonight.

SPEAKER_05 23:32

Oh, sure.

SPEAKER_04 23:33

But I'll probably come out Saturday.

SPEAKER_05 23:37

I'm sure I'm gonna bum. I haven't done a lot of sets, haven't done really too many at all. So I mean it depends.

SPEAKER_04 23:43

It's my wife's birthday, so it depends what she wants to do. But if we come through that way, I'll definitely stop through. Right, no, I think y'all should go out and uh have some fun. We had sneaky sex last night. Oh shit. Sneaky. Sneaky, sneaky. It's the best kind.

SPEAKER_01 24:00

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04 24:02

We were in the we were in line for the movie. It was it was real sneaky.

SPEAKER_05 24:11

That is sneaky as well.

SPEAKER_00 24:13

Yeah, it is. Can he hear me? Yeah, he can hear you.

SPEAKER_05 24:16

Yeah, I hear you a little bit. How are you doing, Michelle?

SPEAKER_00 24:18

I'm good. How are you, baby? I'm good. No, what he just said was a whole ass lie. We did have sneaky sex, but it wasn't at the movie theater. It was in his dad's house.

SPEAKER_05 24:30

Oh, well, that's not as fun.

SPEAKER_00 24:33

It was fun.

SPEAKER_05 24:36

Take your word for it.

SPEAKER_04 24:39

I'll see you next week. All right, brother. Well see you source. I just want to check in with you, bro.

SPEAKER_05 24:48

All right, man. We miss you. I miss you guys. Fucking uh, I can't wait to see you. I feel see you on fucking uh Saturday. I'll fucking uh if y'all come out Monday, let me know. I'll definitely come out Monday.

SPEAKER_04 25:00

All right, word, and I'll talk, I'll talk to my boy Ermindo, and we'll see. I don't know if he does diesel stuff or not, but I'll talk to him. Remind me not on the podcast. All right, but I got you. All right, bro.

SPEAKER_05 25:12

Alright, man. Love you, buddy.

SPEAKER_04 25:14

Love you too, man. There he goes, my man. That's his new uh theme music. I'll try to get to the next song on the on our list here.

SPEAKER_00 25:30

So, um, what's with the pirates?

SPEAKER_04 25:34

Oh yeah, these pirates. Look at these little motherfuckers. I'm gonna click on it. People's on this cruise ship, right? I don't even want I'm sure it's fucking uh clickbait.

SPEAKER_03 25:47

Right.

SPEAKER_04 25:48

But this fucking uh this what's the name? Uh the guy who drives it. The cabin. He takes some kind of fucking maneuver and see and sinks these motherfuckers. They're trying to get grappling hooks up on there, but while they're doing it, he like turn Man, this is gonna be hard to explain visually. So they get to one side of the boat in the ocean, and when they connect on the side of the boat, he makes a turn so that it it that the tide is clipping them on a certain angle. They get attached to the boat, and then he turned back across it. So when he turned across it, basically it sucked their boats underneath the fucking ship.

SPEAKER_01 26:40

Really?

SPEAKER_04 26:41

Yeah, yeah. So they were fucked. You know what I'm saying? If they were if they would if they would have been loose, it wouldn't have been a big a deal, but they he like kinda let them get attached and then did some nautical shit on the ass. Um wild. Yeah, I know, right? Remember that movie uh what was it called with Tom Hanks? Captain Oh, you're right, it was Captain's Phipps Is that right?

SPEAKER_00 27:17

Phelps?

SPEAKER_04 27:18

Captain That's the swimmer that smokes weed. I think it's Michael Phelps. I think that's his name, Michael Phelps. Yeah, that's that's the guy who had the Somali pirates in his submarine and got shot in the head. No, I think it's Captain Phipps. No.

SPEAKER_00 27:41

Phillips.

SPEAKER_04 27:42

Phillips!

SPEAKER_03 27:43

God damn it! Phillips.

SPEAKER_04 27:46

Damn it! Bobby Phipps was the guy I went to high school with.

SPEAKER_07 27:59

I know it's embedded in that.

SPEAKER_04 28:01

Man, it's Greg again. Let's see who else we got. Ello Langley. Another week when I did this, and we're just flipping through songs, seeing what's hot.

SPEAKER_07 28:19

I don't like them, but just when I thought I got in the fall in love with female country fair.

SPEAKER_00 28:29

Not my baggage.

SPEAKER_04 28:30

Very typical, right? That's the Jake, Drake, Drake, Drake, Olivia Rodrigo, Olivia Rodrigo, Ella Langley, Olivia Rodrigo. You people are musically. No, it's probably they probably just came out with albums, is what happened, right? Uh-oh, this is young Miami.

unknown 28:52

Miami.

SPEAKER_04 28:53

Miami. It's like I knew, but I really didn't know. I just got lucky. Oh, I gotta bleep that out. Alright, we're good.

SPEAKER_01 29:08

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_04 29:09

More Olivia Rodrigo. Uh-oh. Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift's. Come in the top 20. More Olivia Rodrigo.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

She's going back towards country a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 29:21

Who's Mac Miller? This is Cinderella. This is T Y dollar sign. Or thank you, dollar.

SPEAKER_00 29:33

Ty Dollar. Ty Dala.

SPEAKER_04 29:35

It's Ty Dollar. You knew that one? Yeah. You're more hit than I am.

SPEAKER_00 29:43

Ever so slightly. It's like different. Only thanks to Joseph.

SPEAKER_04 29:48

Yeah, it's like different shit.

SPEAKER_00 29:50

If I didn't have a 17-year-old, almost 18-year-old, I wouldn't know any of it.

SPEAKER_04 29:54

Oh man, let's take this call. Hey, Pop.

SPEAKER_06 29:58

Hey, Bonin. How you doing?

SPEAKER_04 30:00

I'm good, man. I'm good. I'm on the podcast right now. Can I call you back?

SPEAKER_06 30:04

You're where?

SPEAKER_04 30:05

I'm podcasting.

SPEAKER_06 30:07

You're on the podcast, Pop.

SPEAKER_04 30:09

All right.

SPEAKER_06 30:10

Oh, so okay. Can I talk to Michelle?

SPEAKER_04 30:13

Yeah, you talk to whoever you want.

SPEAKER_00 30:16

What's up? What's up, Papa?

SPEAKER_06 30:18

Oh, Michelle. Are you a podcaster also?

SPEAKER_00 30:22

Yes, and so are you now?

SPEAKER_06 30:25

And so am I now. Okay. Very good.

SPEAKER_04 30:27

I'm almost done.

SPEAKER_06 30:29

Okay. I mean, you're in.

SPEAKER_04 30:32

Yes, sir. Headed that way.

SPEAKER_06 30:34

Oh, okay. You guys gonna be hungry when you get here?

SPEAKER_04 30:38

Sure.

SPEAKER_06 30:39

Okay. All right.

SPEAKER_04 30:40

All right, bye. My man.

SPEAKER_01 30:46

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 30:47

I wonder what we eat tonight. What you think? We had uh tacos last night.

SPEAKER_00 30:54

Oh man, them tacos are so nice.

SPEAKER_04 30:55

Taco Tuesday. Is that cultural appropriation?

SPEAKER_00 30:58

That's called that what is that place called? Chaprito. I don't know. It's like something like that. It's like the goat.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

The goat.

SPEAKER_00 31:07

The little goat.

SPEAKER_04 31:08

Maybe. Um I don't know, that shit's good. Them birria tacos are fucking excellent.

SPEAKER_00 31:13

All of them.

SPEAKER_04 31:14

All of them.

SPEAKER_00 31:14

I had the barbecue. That shit was banging.

SPEAKER_04 31:16

Yeah. You ever ate the uh the head when they do the cheeks and the chop it all up?

SPEAKER_00 31:23

You know better.

SPEAKER_04 31:24

I didn't know if you might ate it not knowing what it was. Nope. It's good.

SPEAKER_00 31:29

You know me, baby. I ain't putting some shit in my mouth. I don't know what it is. Uh-huh. I was I was a vegetarian when I met you.

SPEAKER_04 31:40

Not no milk.

SPEAKER_00 31:41

No. I love the meats.

SPEAKER_04 31:44

We got the meats.

SPEAKER_00 31:45

That's Arby's.

SPEAKER_04 31:47

Yeah, I know. You like that shit too, don't you? All right. So let's look at another some more news without fucking looking at any of this bullshit. So we got it.

SPEAKER_00 31:58

We're jumping back and forth from news to music, news to music. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:01

We're just kind of for free balling today.

SPEAKER_00 32:03

Free balling.

SPEAKER_04 32:04

Um, Joseph's got a bunch of people are into the World Cup, man. I like to see that actually.

SPEAKER_00 32:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:11

It's kind of cool.

SPEAKER_00 32:12

Yeah. He's super into it. So it surprises me, but I can't do it.

SPEAKER_04 32:17

I can't do it, man. They gotta fix the fucking clock. If they fix the clock, soccer would be one of the best sports in the world.

SPEAKER_00 32:24

I think it's fun to watch.

SPEAKER_04 32:25

It is fun to watch, but you don't know when the fuck it's gonna be over.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

Those men are just killing it out there.

SPEAKER_04 32:31

I get you. And if you watch away from the ball, they take a lot of breaks. I mean, they walk a lot. They run, don't get me wrong, they're in great shape, and I'm not diminishing what they do, but like they walk a lot. As soon as it's away from them, they're taking a stroll. You know what I mean? They're tugging on their shorts. But nil-nil is hard for Americans.

SPEAKER_00 32:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 33:00

You know?

SPEAKER_00 33:01

But if it was nil further proving how gross the average American is.

SPEAKER_04 33:06

But if it was nil-nil and the clock was going ten, nine, eight, you know, there's some amount of like yeah, excitement to it. But it just clicks and then it goes over 90 minutes, and you're in extra time, and nobody fucking knows who my how much extra time there is except the guy on the field. The television doesn't even know.

SPEAKER_00 33:29

The television does know because, dude.

SPEAKER_04 33:31

It's not right, it's not official.

SPEAKER_00 33:33

It has always has a little plus sign and a little red box next to it, and that is gets added to the 90 minutes at the end. I get it. As soon as it's if it says plus five, it stops at 95 minutes. Does it? It's not that hard to figure out. No, I don't think it does. 100% it does. No. Promising.

SPEAKER_03 33:47

I think it's weird.

SPEAKER_00 33:48

I think you're wrong. I think you count backwards. I think that may be how it used to be in the 1990s when you tried to watch it once in 1997. And you were like, I hate this. Oh. And you decided, yeah, but it was on there. It was on there yesterday while you were complaining about it. It's like this is absolutely.

SPEAKER_04 34:08

But it didn't wasn't right at 95 minutes, though, was it? It wasn't. It wasn't.

SPEAKER_00 34:13

It was. It absolutely wasn't.

SPEAKER_04 34:15

I thought it was 95 minutes and they were still playing. And like, nope, you know, 45 seconds later he blew it with.

SPEAKER_00 34:20

That's why that last uh ball that went into the net didn't count because it was after the time had ended. They scored in that last like second of the game, but it didn't count because the time was up.

SPEAKER_04 34:33

I think you bullshit.

SPEAKER_00 34:34

Which made it exciting. No, that shit was real because everybody was like, oh my God. Nope, just kidding. Didn't count.

SPEAKER_03 34:41

Huh.

SPEAKER_00 34:41

Yeah. And I have to tell you that like I understand what you're saying, because I'm honestly not a huge soccer fan, but I grew up in an area of Baltimore where soccer was really, really popular. And so I grew up watching it and I kind of understand it.

SPEAKER_04 34:55

But soccer's popular in Maryland, period.

SPEAKER_00 34:57

Right. But the thing is, is like I think for like you said, it doesn't have that excitement factor, but I think for soccer fans, it does. You know what I mean? People who are genuinely fans of soccer, it's like a slow hockey. No, I hear you. I I get what you're saying because I love hockey. Yeah, man. That's probably my favorite professional sport.

SPEAKER_04 35:16

Especially live.

SPEAKER_00 35:17

Especially live. But even on TV, I like I like it.

SPEAKER_04 35:20

All right, so there's a good example. So those guys are going all out.

SPEAKER_00 35:25

The whole time.

SPEAKER_04 35:26

The whole time. But they only do 40 second shifts.

SPEAKER_00 35:30

Right.

SPEAKER_04 35:30

You know what I mean? So they go 100% back to the bench. 100% back to the bench, and they're constantly fucking rotating. Right. Whereas, you know, the I think it's soccer guys stay on the field.

SPEAKER_00 35:40

It's a really, really long time. They do. Which is why when they get a chance to take a couple steps and take a breath when the ball is away from them. That's you know what I mean, how they keep their energy throughout the game. Keep going.

SPEAKER_04 35:52

Messi got three fucking goals.

SPEAKER_00 35:54

Goals. Like bam, bam, bam. Yeah, this shit was crazy. I'm like, damn, that man is actually sick.

SPEAKER_04 35:59

He is sick. And now he's uh 38 years old, I believe. Or so I mean, we only got this is probably his his you know, creme de la creme World Cup.

SPEAKER_00 36:10

Right.

SPEAKER_04 36:10

Because next time it comes around, what's it come around every two years?

SPEAKER_00 36:14

I think so. I don't know. Man, I'm I have no idea.

SPEAKER_04 36:18

Yeah, fucking Mexican don't know about the World Cup.

SPEAKER_00 36:19

Yeah, right? What the fuck is wrong with you?

SPEAKER_04 36:21

Anyway, but I don't think, you know, how many years can you have going that hard? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I know.

SPEAKER_00 36:29

But he's in crazy shape. Yeah. And then the other one, um, Cristiano Ronaldo, he's getting up there too.

SPEAKER_04 36:36

Well, he's fallen off. He's 41. And he's not what he was. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 36:41

So you just yesterday, Joseph was really digging on this uh player from Norway, who, by the way, is a beast of a human being. A lot of those soccer guys are like lean, seem seemingly a little bit smaller guys. Um, and if tall, they're very like slender, long. This dude is a monster human being. His name is Holland, but it's spelled because he's from Norway. He told me A A L A M D, I think.

SPEAKER_04 37:12

He is a big dude.

SPEAKER_00 37:12

That is a big he looks like a freaking Norse Viking or some shit. I'm like, good. Too much strain.

SPEAKER_04 37:20

Too much strain. There's people those guys are built like that.

SPEAKER_00 37:23

Sick.

SPEAKER_04 37:24

Yeah, now, those guys are built like that on purpose. You know what I'm saying? Like outside of because your body kind of like uh fits to your sport, you know what I'm saying? So they got big hard legs, yeah, and not much to carry around.

SPEAKER_00 37:38

Yeah, when I was in high school, uh, went to school with a guy. I think I told you the story before, but it per it pertains. So went to high school with a guy who was like just this incredible soccer player, sick soccer player. He had gotten accepted on some team in Europe, which for somebody from frickin' Parkville, you know, Maryland, was like, oh my god, this is crazy. This guy's gonna, you know, get paid to play soccer, which is amazing. That's like all he's ever done in his whole life. Started playing when he was like four. A couple months before school ended, he and this girl who had been dating for several years broke up, got into an argument. She ran him over in the school parking lot and broke both of his legs. And I was walking across the like the sidewalk, not maybe 30 feet away from them.

SPEAKER_04 38:24

Did she get in trouble?

SPEAKER_00 38:26

Honestly, I don't remember. I don't think so because she said it was an accident. Like she didn't mean to run him over.

SPEAKER_04 38:31

Did she or did he walk again?

SPEAKER_00 38:34

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 38:35

Did he hit it? She hit his penis.

SPEAKER_00 38:37

I don't think so. It just broke his legs and ruined his soccer career, which of course changed the course of his life.

SPEAKER_04 38:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:44

Probably not. But yeah, it definitely had one of those over. Definitely did. I'm saying. It was crazy though. The sound that came out of him is was I mean, it might save his life. Nothing like I ever heard before. The scream and the moan, and then the crying, and like, oh my god, dude. It was horrible. Horrible. Stuff a sock in his mouth or something. It was bad.

SPEAKER_04 39:08

Was you friends with him?

SPEAKER_00 39:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:10

Yeah. Were you friends with her too?

SPEAKER_00 39:12

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_04 39:13

Did he fight did he so he got he lived and everything?

SPEAKER_00 39:17

Oh yeah, of course.

SPEAKER_04 39:18

He's still alive?

SPEAKER_00 39:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:19

Yeah. You know what his name is?

SPEAKER_00 39:21

Of course I know what his name is.

SPEAKER_04 39:23

We had we had one like when I was, I remember being in eighth grade or seventh grade, you know, junior high, and seeing the articles about uh the high school kid that got to go to Europe from you know, little dinky this school, you know, blah, blah, blah. And by the time I graduated, I realized that there was one in every class from every school. It was some kind of program. Some of them couldn't afford to go, you know what I'm saying? But it was like an outreach thing.

SPEAKER_00 39:58

Yeah, that's not what this was.

SPEAKER_04 40:00

I hear you. But they always walked around like they fucking it was weird. Like after I I didn't know that at the time. And I was a football player, so you know, there was a little riff dumb, you know. Because both fall sports, football player versus soccer player, you know what I mean? You're only a soccer player because you're not tough enough to be a football player, you know, kind of shit. Type shit, as the kids say. TS, TS. So but they would walk around like they were fucking famous. And they weren't. Not even a little bit. They were just dumb soccer players. No, I'm just kidding. I was friends with most of them guys, man. They were they're always alright. And they were always the wrestling guys, too. Like the wrestling players and the wrestling players and the soccer players were always the same players.

SPEAKER_00 40:57

Not at my school. No?

SPEAKER_04 41:01

You have more people than my school though, probably.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

Yeah, probably. Probably. We didn't have a huge school, but it was probably more than likely bigger than North Carolina in the 90s.

SPEAKER_03 41:12

Doubt it. Doubt it.

SPEAKER_00 41:16

Don't doubt it.

SPEAKER_03 41:17

I doubt it. That was dumb.

SPEAKER_04 41:20

I'm just kidding.

SPEAKER_00 41:21

I know. That's why I said that was dumb.

SPEAKER_04 41:24

Man, this is a dumb fucking. I'm looking at this goddamn news thing and I hate it. I don't like it. Let's go do a set. I want to go do a set.

SPEAKER_00 41:32

Alright.

SPEAKER_04 41:32

Alright. I love you.

SPEAKER_00 41:33

Where's your counter?

SPEAKER_04 41:34

Um, so jospaincomedy.com, Joe Spain Comedy on Instagram. I got some shows coming up. I got a couple weeks off trying to get on all this family and love life stuff straight, but on house, living situation. But not this weekend, which is the 20th. Let me look at the fucking calendar. So I don't lie to you.

SPEAKER_00 42:00

This Saturday is the 20th, my birthday.

SPEAKER_04 42:02

This Saturday is the 20th, which is Michelle's birthday. And the day after that is her mom's birthday. So everybody.

SPEAKER_00 42:09

Mama.

SPEAKER_04 42:09

So Friday the 26th, I'm at Dream Big Venues in Del Mar Delaware. Those tickets, I think, are I think there's still a couple available. The 27th is in Denton, Maryland, at a brewery. And I the oh, Eden. Is that what it's called?

SPEAKER_00 42:28

Eden Town Brewery.

SPEAKER_04 42:29

Eden Town Brewerly. And I'm that was more than halfway sold out last week. So it's that one's getting really close, if not sold out. And then Sunday, I'm at the DC Improv, Tony Woods and Friends. You never know who's going to pop in on that one. So that's going to be a fun show in the main room at the DC Improv. Good times. Busy weekend.

SPEAKER_00 42:53

Yep. I love you.

SPEAKER_04 42:54

I love you too, baby. Justbeing Comedy.com. Just being comedy. Love you guys.