OGYN #40 Jail tales with Curtis Saylor

     Thank you all for listening!!  Please share with a friend and comment wherever you are listening. 

In this episode: @George C. Saylor II joins Joe with his life story. From foster care to workforce, to prison and marriage. Slaughter house work and traveling to Madison, Wisconsin. Interesting trip through a turbulent 50+ years, only to refind love and live to tell about it. Good fun, serious, silly, real conversation. 

     Joe and Izzy chop it up and tackle all the tough issues with comedy. Live Show tix joespaincomedy.com 

Thank you to everyone who laughs with us. Please Like, Share and comment to keep us improving. Spread the laughter. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:52

I couldn't find a plug. Damn. Welcome to another OGYM podcast. I'm your boy Joe Spain.

SPEAKER_04 0:59

Here. Here.

SPEAKER_03 1:02

On a regular Tuesday evening. Finally. I didn't get to do one last week. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 1:06

This is number 40. 40.

SPEAKER_03 1:09

40. 40. 2x 20. 4x 10. 8 times 5. 6 don't work. The 6 don't work, does it? I don't think 6 works. 7 don't work. 8 already said. Yep, so we're around the horn. I'm here this week for number 40 with my man, Curtis Saylor. How you doing, Curtis? I'm good.

SPEAKER_02 1:32

How are you doing, Joe?

SPEAKER_03 1:33

I'm good, man. I'm glad to see you. I'm glad you could come do this. I like doing uh, I like sitting down with people, man. And like this gives you an excuse to hang out and have a conversation. And like, I can ask you shit that I ain't never asked you for, or we can talk about shit that we've done before, or whatever. I've known you for how many years now?

SPEAKER_02 1:56

Good about 20 years.

SPEAKER_03 1:57

I love talking to people with good stories, man. And I think you got a you got a one-of-a-kind story. So when did we meet? Usually get ready to tell me before we started us.

SPEAKER_02 2:09

Me and Timmy went on um Timmy Saylor. My brother Tim Saylor uh came in his car to Colonel Richardson High School. We went to see the Colonels play, and the basketball star was Alonzo Morning. Remember him that went to Yukon?

SPEAKER_03 2:27

Albert. Albert. Albert Mourney. Albert Mourning. Alonzo played for the uh Georgetown. Yeah, Georgetown. Albert Morning. Yeah, yeah. Albert and Kivan was on that team.

SPEAKER_02 2:39

And that night is the first time I met you.

SPEAKER_03 2:41

Uh uh. I knew you before that.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

Really?

SPEAKER_03 2:43

I think so.

SPEAKER_02 2:44

Well, that's the first time I met your mom, was that night.

SPEAKER_03 2:47

What's my mom? Why you gotta bring my mom in it?

SPEAKER_02 2:49

She was a nice lady. Respectful, always nice with me.

SPEAKER_03 2:53

She's a good cook, man. That's one thing I miss about my mama. That food. So how old were you then? No, I met you before. I met you out of four now. I met you at a party where there was lots of drinking.

SPEAKER_02 3:11

Always a lot of drinking.

SPEAKER_03 3:12

And you got in a fight. And I only met you in passing. And it was on Hobbs Road, and I was young. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

That's when I was at Bethany House.

SPEAKER_03 3:23

Yes. That was when you're in Bethany. Alright, so let's just get into it, man. So where were you born at?

unknown 3:28

P.

SPEAKER_02 3:28

G County, Chevrolet.

SPEAKER_03 3:30

Chevly?

SPEAKER_02 3:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:31

Damn, that's a stop on the uh on the subway.

SPEAKER_02 3:34

Yeah. I know that's why I mean that hospital no longer exists. Uh uh. Yep.

SPEAKER_03 3:39

What'd it used to be? Is a red line stop?

SPEAKER_02 3:42

Uh no, he just found a hospital more. I think they built apartments there.

SPEAKER_03 3:47

No shit. Yep. Ain't that a bummer? So well, there's big ass hospitals being built everywhere. Maybe they move it. So you was born in Chevley. How long did you stay in Chevrolet? Chevley's like a suburb of DC.

SPEAKER_02 4:00

Yeah, um, lived in PG County. Um my parents were like, we say, have children. Yeah, but don't want to be parents. Yeah. And um my grandparents, my dad, mom and dad raised me until I was 12.

SPEAKER_03 4:15

And where? In Chevley?

SPEAKER_02 4:17

In Hydesville. Hyattsville. Hydesville.

SPEAKER_03 4:20

I like how I see. So your dad. Yeah, my dad. Lived in Hyattsville.

SPEAKER_02 4:26

Yeah, my grandparents as well.

SPEAKER_03 4:28

See, me and Tim and uh went to see your dad. In Riverdale. Was it Riverdale? Yeah. And we was playing darts and got all fucked up and he ended up fucking that woman up.

unknown 4:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 4:42

Yeah, I remember that. End up slinging that bitch around. You were there, weren't you?

SPEAKER_02 4:46

I think that was that's my stepmother.

SPEAKER_03 4:48

Yes. Yeah, is she alive still?

SPEAKER_02 4:51

No.

SPEAKER_03 4:51

No. So we could talk about him all they want.

SPEAKER_02 4:53

Yeah. Yeah. He's gone too, so yeah, yeah, no.

SPEAKER_03 4:56

Um, I was at Timmy's house when he got your dad in the box.

unknown 5:02

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 5:02

That's a weird story, isn't it? Yeah, I swear to God. He lived in Virginia Beach, and my son, who just graduated high school, was barely walking. Like he was walking but falling over a lot. Right. And we got to Timmy's house, we got all the way up the steps, and um there was a box sitting in his door. The apartment in Virginia Beach.

SPEAKER_02 5:24

That's when Lulu was a little baby.

SPEAKER_03 5:26

Uh uh Lulu wasn't born yet. Lulu wasn't born yet. Lulu's his daughter, who is how old is she now? 15?

SPEAKER_02 5:34

16.

SPEAKER_03 5:35

16. Yeah. So it was just before Lulu. Because I'm telling you, Joseph was little. He was probably one or two. So I remember uh I was trying to talk talk Timmy and let me snort some of your dad. I was like, man, it might give me a buzz. You never know, you know what I'm saying? He got it in. All right, so when you was 12, what happened?

SPEAKER_02 6:00

Uh grandparents couldn't hold. I was this wild kid.

SPEAKER_03 6:04

So the the Wild or Bad? Both.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

Wild and bad. Uh they had old ways of West Virginia hillbillies, don't speak until you've spoken to, don't back, don't sass.

SPEAKER_03 6:17

And that made you do the opposite.

SPEAKER_02 6:18

Yeah, and also they would use corporal punishment, like make paddles with holes in them.

SPEAKER_03 6:26

Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_02 6:27

Or uh grandmother used to can hot peppers. Yeah. She would make them in.

SPEAKER_03 6:32

She stick them in your butt?

SPEAKER_02 6:34

No, she would make it eat the whole jar.

SPEAKER_03 6:36

What?

SPEAKER_02 6:37

Yeah, that type of punishment. And then when we get ass whippings, grandfather taught us men don't cry. So we had to take it without crying.

SPEAKER_03 6:46

Oh man. I had a guy tell me one time, take it without crying.

SPEAKER_04 6:50

He was like, take it without crying, don't you make a sound.

SPEAKER_03 6:53

Sorry, flashback. And he so my parents beat the like my mom, believe it or not, was a beater. She was, she she had a switch. Like she hit me with a hose one time and the hose wrapped around me, and the metal end of it cracked one of my ribs and put this big old strawberry fucking nasty bruise on me. And I thought I was gonna call Boys Town Hotline. Yeah, but it didn't work out like that. Boys Town don't care, man. They know, fucking, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_02 7:26

So I started running away at 12. At 12, and they would bring me back.

SPEAKER_03 7:31

Where was you running to?

SPEAKER_02 7:33

Anywhere.

SPEAKER_03 7:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:35

I just didn't want to be there. So they eventually uh put me in.

SPEAKER_03 7:38

I mean like to the street?

SPEAKER_02 7:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 7:40

To a friend's house?

SPEAKER_02 7:41

Just running the street.

SPEAKER_03 7:42

Yeah. Like stay away overnight?

SPEAKER_02 7:45

No, no. It was never that. Oh, they got a couple hours, three or four hours.

SPEAKER_03 7:50

No, that's what's happening. I did that too. I took off running a couple times.

SPEAKER_02 7:56

So uh the State Department of Social Services came into the CPS. And then I went to foster home, and by the time I was 16, I was at Beltonny House in Cordova.

SPEAKER_03 8:05

So wait a minute, wait a minute. So CPS steps in and takes you from your grandparents, they put you in a uh an orphanage. No, foster home. Right into a foster home. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:15

Um Family Oriental in Beltsville.

SPEAKER_03 8:18

Oh, right there in the same community. So you still saw your parents, but you live with somebody else?

SPEAKER_02 8:23

Yeah. So I saw I didn't see my parents, I see my grandparents.

SPEAKER_03 8:27

All right. Your parents were all fucking up.

SPEAKER_02 8:29

My mom was already gone by the time I was 12. She rolled out when I was six. Right. She took my middle brother and went to and left.

SPEAKER_03 8:36

I ain't never met you. Oh, yes, I have.

SPEAKER_02 8:38

The one in Florida? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:39

Yeah, yeah. I met him, man.

SPEAKER_02 8:40

I haven't seen him in 30 years.

SPEAKER_03 8:42

Um, it's probably been 30 years. I bought weed from him. I hope he hears this. I bought weed from him when I was in uh it don't matter now, it's legal. Yeah. Like 20 years ago, I bought, you know, like an eighth of weed or something. I ended up in uh Stuart, Florida. Right? Yeah. And I was like, man, I know somebody lives right around here. Sure enough, it was your brother. And he brought me an eighth of weed, and I got to get high the whole time I was on vacation. All right, so you're in a foster care. Did you like your first foster family?

SPEAKER_02 9:14

Yeah, they were a nice family. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:16

Yeah. That's it.

SPEAKER_02 9:19

Well, they they had a son, a daughter, and another foster girl. They treat me like family, you know. At Christmas time, I got as many Christmas presents as everybody else, and they treat me like equal.

SPEAKER_03 9:33

You still talk to them?

SPEAKER_02 9:34

No. No. I'm in my 50s now, so no, I hear you. But I don't know if they're still alive or not.

SPEAKER_03 9:40

How many of your foster how many foster families did you have before Bethany House? Two. Both of them were good?

SPEAKER_02 9:49

Yeah, I just so they were both good, but I just wasn't, didn't want to listen to the rules.

SPEAKER_03 9:56

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 9:56

So I rebelled, but it was you pushing back.

SPEAKER_03 9:59

It wasn't them being pieces of shit.

SPEAKER_02 10:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:01

Dude, my brother my son has a friend who was in foster care, and the day he turned 18, the day she locked him out of his fucking house. And he's been homeless ever since. Like it sucks. Fucking yeah, man. There's gotta be some there's got like I'm jumping ahead a little bit, but when you go to the can, if you want, they'll help you.

SPEAKER_02 10:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:28

You know what I mean? If you ask before you're out, when they start saying, What are you gonna do when you get out of here? You both if you ask for the help, there are programs and fucking uh support groups and all that kind of shit, halfway houses. Why isn't there that for foster kids, man?

SPEAKER_02 10:45

Yeah, because the money stops. So the reason she kicked them out because the money stopped coming in for defeat them or clothing. So she's a fellow, he's an adult, so he kicked her out.

SPEAKER_03 10:56

I mean, she's she's within her legal within her legal right to do so. I get that. Yeah, but what kind of fucking human being, and even if I I know there's a lot of pieces of shit in the world, so there should be something else where this kid can pick up a phone and say, look, this bitch just kicked me out. Fuck it. Give it give them six months.

SPEAKER_02 11:16

They have up to 21 to be still in the Park of Social Services, but you can emancipate yourself like me. I emancipated myself at 18, so I'll cut all ties with social services in the state of Maryland.

SPEAKER_03 11:29

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 11:29

So he could emancipate himself, or he could he can still be within the system.

SPEAKER_03 11:35

Problem is the system is gonna get him. Just you know how it goes, man. You know what I mean? The system is gonna turn on him at some point. He's gonna get caught sleeping on a bench or something, and then once he gets into that fucking cycle, man, what is he gonna do?

SPEAKER_02 11:50

Nothing.

SPEAKER_03 11:50

Nothing. Except sleep on a goddamn steel bench.

SPEAKER_02 11:54

In Denton.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

In Denton, Maryland, or any other small town in America, or fucking Beirut. Alright, so 16, you go to Bethany House.

SPEAKER_02 12:08

Cordova, Maryland.

SPEAKER_03 12:09

In Cordova, which is uh what would you say?

SPEAKER_02 12:12

It's a half, it's a it was a transitional halfway house. Halfway house. Well, it was either you either do it the right way or you end up going to Carter Center, and that was located in.

SPEAKER_03 12:25

Well, Carter Center was for juvenile services. Was for delinquents, though, right?

SPEAKER_02 12:29

Right. So this was here was like the the last step.

SPEAKER_03 12:33

You had a chance.

SPEAKER_02 12:33

Yeah, you either do it right or you were gonna go to juvenile services. A lot of boys then do it right, so they went to juvenile services.

SPEAKER_03 12:41

Right. I know a lot of boys that from Bethany House that would go away from Bethany House and then come back to Bethany House and then go. I don't know whether they were going with families or why they were in and out like that, but like I knew Lyle and uh of course you and Timmy and Richie Greenwood. Richie and yeah, like I knew everybody, those were kind of my friends, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02 13:05

I was there when Richie went had his site. I was there with Bethany had it. Before he had his accident, and then they got they won AWOL, him and Rob McGaughlin McLaughlin and another guy named Chris. Rob McLaughlin. And he passed away, and they stole a car and went to Baltimore.

SPEAKER_03 13:23

Yeah, they always stealing cars, man. When I was in uh can't can't you them the boys will steal cars.

SPEAKER_02 13:30

That's the only way you can get a wheel off that door. You had to steal a car. You can't get walking cross the Bay Bridge.

SPEAKER_03 13:36

We're gonna we're gonna take the van and go to the movies.

SPEAKER_04 13:38

You gonna do what? How many demerits you gonna get today, bitch?

SPEAKER_03 13:44

All right, so Bethany House. So you still went to public school though.

SPEAKER_02 13:47

Yeah, I went to North Carolina High, right there in Bridgeville.

SPEAKER_03 13:49

Did you graduate?

SPEAKER_02 13:50

No, dropped out.

SPEAKER_03 13:52

Did you? Um, how many years what what year did you drop out? Junior? My junior year. Yeah. So you were 16? By that time I was 17?

SPEAKER_02 14:02

Almost 18 years old.

SPEAKER_03 14:03

Almost 18. Yep. So where'd you go from there?

SPEAKER_02 14:07

I lived in Greensboro. I lived with uh the Wright's family.

SPEAKER_03 14:11

Were you working? Don't be telling people's names, man. They might not want you to know that you live with them, especially when you can tell the rest of the story.

SPEAKER_02 14:19

No, I worked with the rofo right there in um Denton right there.

SPEAKER_03 14:22

Oh, yeah, the one in town.

SPEAKER_02 14:23

But my first job.

SPEAKER_03 14:24

That's the ghetto rofo.

SPEAKER_02 14:25

My first job was at McDonald's.

SPEAKER_03 14:27

Yeah? I can see you with that bib on, baby. Ha ha!

SPEAKER_02 14:31

Making four bucks an hour. That was a lot of money back then.

SPEAKER_03 14:34

Yeah, back then, man. I remember 425 thinking I was hot shit.

SPEAKER_02 14:38

Yep, then it went Pizza Hut and then went on rope up.

SPEAKER_03 14:42

Pizza Hut.

SPEAKER_02 14:42

Pizza Hut.

SPEAKER_03 14:43

That's when Pizza Hut was a restaurant, too. Put a mic just a little close to your face, but you can move it, yeah. You can still relax. Just I want people to hear what you're saying.

SPEAKER_02 14:52

So So this was with the uh Caroline County back in the early 90s.

SPEAKER_03 14:58

So what did you uh when's the first time you got in trouble trouble? I was 19. So the next year. Yeah. What happened? You ain't gotta tell me the like the story, but what did they charge you with?

SPEAKER_02 15:14

Having sex with a minor.

SPEAKER_03 15:16

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

What was the I was 18, she was 14.

SPEAKER_03 15:20

That's what happens. It's Maryland, it's four years, right? I had a guy, was it uh did the parent was the mom the one that pushed it or the grandpa? Yeah, the mother. It was the mom. Yep. So um I think what should I say about this? I think that that should be a case-by-case basis. And I knew a guy who worked for worked with me. He was 19 years old. He had a consensual relationship with a 14-year-old girl, and he's in prison, prison, prison for a long time, doing hard time with those that paperwork, you know what I'm saying? Um, and he tried to run away, so he got that stacked on top. But I met that girl, and he ain't do nothing wrong. I'm here to tell you. I've had a 14-year-old daughter, and uh, yeah, that's a tough one, but yeah, it's still, I don't know, man. So anyway, what'd you end up getting for that for that one?

SPEAKER_02 16:25

Um a year.

SPEAKER_03 16:27

In jail.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 16:29

Local.

SPEAKER_02 16:30

No, no, I went to Division of Craigslist.

SPEAKER_03 16:32

Oh, you they sent you to DOC for a year.

SPEAKER_02 16:34

Yeah, they gave me uh um pre-release.

SPEAKER_03 16:39

Yeah. Did they make you register? Was that a thing back then? No. Well, that's goddamn b that came later on. Right, right. So, um So that was my first So you did a year?

SPEAKER_02 16:52

Ten and a half months on a year. Really?

SPEAKER_03 16:54

So they you did most of them.

SPEAKER_02 16:55

No, why? Because I worked in the kitchen at the EPRU Eastern Pre-Release Unit in Churchville or Churchill. So in Queen Anne's County.

SPEAKER_03 17:06

Is it still there?

SPEAKER_02 17:08

It is, but it's got a it's got a fence around it now. Uh the neighbors say they didn't want.

SPEAKER_03 17:13

So you went to the Cannes for the real jail and then they put you in that, or you went straight there?

SPEAKER_02 17:18

I went from DOC downtown Baltimore to pre-release.

SPEAKER_03 17:21

Oh, it happened in Baltimore.

SPEAKER_02 17:24

No. That's where when you get sentenced to visit a correction, you got to go to Baltimore to be diagnostic.

SPEAKER_03 17:30

Yeah, uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 17:32

To prisons.

SPEAKER_03 17:33

Right.

SPEAKER_02 17:33

So I had a low security, so they sent me there.

SPEAKER_03 17:36

That's what's up, which is a county facility.

SPEAKER_02 17:39

Yeah, it's a camp. Yeah. Go get a job somewhere. You can you didn't have a fence around the place. You sleep there, period. Yeah, that's it.

unknown 17:46

Damn.

SPEAKER_02 17:47

So shit. I had a job working in the kitchen. I was young, hot-headed. Dude said something to me early in the morning. It was like four o'clock in the morning. I didn't like his answer. So I decked him. Oh, they locked me up and took me to Jessup to Brockbridge.

unknown 18:07

Oh god.

SPEAKER_02 18:08

Gave me 60 days on the hole, changed my security level from EP um pre-release to medium mass.

SPEAKER_03 18:18

God damn. It's for the whole time.

SPEAKER_02 18:21

Yeah. And that's how I ended up doing leaving the ECI. Ten and a half months on a year.

SPEAKER_03 18:27

So you got out, you were 20?

SPEAKER_02 18:29

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 18:30

Then what'd you do? Move back to Denton. Oh, what a dumbass.

SPEAKER_04 18:36

You never go back where you shit. I can't say much though. I'm still trying to get out.

SPEAKER_02 18:43

So uh at the Rofo, somebody left their Chrysler Fifth Avenue running with the keys in, and I just slid into the driver's light.

SPEAKER_03 18:54

Straight out of jail?

SPEAKER_02 18:55

Straight out of jail.

SPEAKER_03 18:56

Jesus Carl Rice.

SPEAKER_02 18:58

Ramed around town in a Chrysler Fifth Avenue.

SPEAKER_03 19:00

Yeah. Is it fun?

SPEAKER_02 19:02

Not when you get caught in it.

SPEAKER_03 19:03

Did you pick up any honeys? Did you bump the beats?

SPEAKER_04 19:07

Nothing. Did it have hydraulics?

SPEAKER_02 19:11

So I caught an authorized use of motor vehicle and they gave me five years for that.

SPEAKER_03 19:18

Whoa! What's up, dumbass? Get out of jail, go to prison. So where'd they ship you that time?

SPEAKER_02 19:27

ECI. Yeah. Three and a half on five. Three and a half years in ECI. Got out in went in 93, got out late 96. No women.

unknown 19:42

91, 92.

SPEAKER_02 19:44

Late 95.

SPEAKER_03 19:46

I remember. That's when I met you. Late 95. That's when I met you. Because I graduated high school in 95. And that makes sense that you came home. Because you were home for a little bit of time.

SPEAKER_02 19:58

Yeah, I lived in Salisbury with my brother.

SPEAKER_03 20:01

That's right. But oh man, whatever. You just jogged that memory in my man. I I remember before that then, because I was in that apartment all the fucking time. When he punched you in the nose and fucking where you pulled a steak knife. Yeah. Pulled a steak knife on your on. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:19

My current wife, she was there at that party whenever.

SPEAKER_03 20:22

Was she really? So there we hit there's this party. Um they get arguing because they're brothers, Timmy, Timmy and Curtis. Timmy's at this time I'm in college. I was at Salisbury State and Salisbury State University in Salisbury, Maryland, and uh I could walk. It was a long ways. It would take me like half the day. But I could walk from Salisbury to that apartment.

SPEAKER_02 20:46

Yeah, because it was on um Route 50.

SPEAKER_03 20:48

That's right. You had to cross Route 50, and uh Salisbury State's on the other side of 13, so you had to walk that whole spot in the middle. So I'd get over there, and man, everybody's already drunk and carrying on. Mary, uh Sharon, a whole bunch of people, man. And he get arguing. Fucking next thing I know, he pulls a knife and oh yeah, motherfucker, oh yeah, crack. Timmy punches him in the nose.

SPEAKER_02 21:13

Yeah, broke my nose.

SPEAKER_03 21:15

Broke his fucking nose.

SPEAKER_02 21:16

That's why his crooked stuff.

SPEAKER_03 21:18

He broke because he broke it again, didn't he? In the hospital.

SPEAKER_02 21:20

Uh I think so.

SPEAKER_04 21:22

Yeah, I think so, Timmy. You come out there talking shit.

SPEAKER_02 21:27

You want to call police?

SPEAKER_04 21:29

Yeah, crack.

SPEAKER_03 21:31

Taped up and shit. Oh man. Anyway, so from there. So how long were you were you in Salisbury? Couple a few months. When did the fat black women start? I know. You married a white woman.

SPEAKER_02 21:52

Yeah, my wife, my white, my wife is white.

SPEAKER_03 21:56

My white wife.

SPEAKER_02 21:57

But she's the second white woman I've ever been in my life.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

I know.

SPEAKER_02 22:00

So always D winner.

SPEAKER_03 22:02

So okay. When do the okay, so let's just continue down the the timeline. So after Salisbury, where you go?

SPEAKER_02 22:09

Uh PG County and went to stay with my dad.

SPEAKER_03 22:11

Back to PG. Why would you do that, Curtis?

SPEAKER_02 22:14

Because it was work there.

SPEAKER_03 22:15

Yeah. What what were you doing?

SPEAKER_02 22:17

I was gonna I got my job with my dad working as a land surveyor.

SPEAKER_03 22:20

Oh, that's a good job.

SPEAKER_02 22:22

So I got to live there and then I had to pay no rent.

SPEAKER_03 22:25

All right. At this point. Are you a felon at this point? Does the car thing count as a felony?

SPEAKER_02 22:30

No, it was a misdemeanor.

SPEAKER_03 22:32

Five years for a misdemeanor because you were a repeat offender. You probably had time hanging over your head.

SPEAKER_02 22:36

Yeah, for the previous charges.

SPEAKER_03 22:38

That's right. Yep. Um, okay, so you're working with your dad.

SPEAKER_02 22:44

Yep, and then I met a woman and ended up moving. Big black woman. No, she was actually a white woman. That's the other one?

SPEAKER_04 22:51

Yeah, the one- Oh man, how'd I trip over the only other white woman in your past?

SPEAKER_02 22:57

So I ended up moving in with her, and my drinking days was work with my dad, go party at the Paragon at College Park, drink all day, go to work. Right. Then I met her, moved in with her, then I started coming in, drinking liquor, popping kalan pens, started doing other type of drugs. And then what kind?

SPEAKER_03 23:19

Like blow?

SPEAKER_02 23:21

Yeah, mostly blow.

SPEAKER_03 23:22

Yeah. I did that.

SPEAKER_02 23:23

Crack. I did that later on, but yeah. No, we're gonna skip ahead.

SPEAKER_03 23:27

I experienced all drugs. Did you?

SPEAKER_02 23:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:29

Is there any you ain't done?

SPEAKER_02 23:31

XSC and Molly.

SPEAKER_03 23:33

Yeah, I ain't fuck with that neither. You know why I didn't fuck with Molly? Because uh I knew this dude who always had methamphetamine. Right. And he would crush it up and put it in these pills and call it Molly.

SPEAKER_02 23:49

That's not Molly.

SPEAKER_03 23:51

So I said, man, I ain't never eating that. I don't know what that is. That's made in a bathtub anyway. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 23:56

No, no, experiment with all experiment with all drugs.

SPEAKER_03 23:59

In that time, like when you were because your dad partied hard.

SPEAKER_02 24:02

Yeah, my dad was just an alcoholic. He liked to drink that beer.

SPEAKER_03 24:07

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 24:08

Wake up next morning and start drinking right all over again.

SPEAKER_03 24:10

And he got mean eventually.

SPEAKER_02 24:12

Yeah, he was a nice and man when he was sober, but when he d drank, he was I seen him go through the transformation a couple times.

SPEAKER_03 24:18

Just mean old man. So how long did it take you before that blew up in your face drinking and fucking when I caught my 15 years?

SPEAKER_02 24:26

I was I drank liquor and clonipins and blacked out and beat up someone really bad. And um so to say I don't remember doing it.

SPEAKER_03 24:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:37

And when I woke up in Upper Margo and they know where I was why I was there.

SPEAKER_03 24:43

In the police station.

SPEAKER_02 24:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 24:46

Oh did they die?

SPEAKER_02 24:48

No.

SPEAKER_03 24:49

No.

SPEAKER_02 24:49

But I was charged with first degree assault, and that's a felony.

SPEAKER_03 24:53

That's a shitty one. Is that was that it, or did they pile them up on you?

SPEAKER_02 24:57

No, that was it. They tried to pile them up on me, but I fought them until the right before trial, and then they came in with a plea bargain and I couldn't refuse.

SPEAKER_03 25:07

And what'd you plead guilty to first degree?

SPEAKER_02 25:08

I pled alpha plea.

SPEAKER_03 25:11

What's that?

SPEAKER_02 25:11

Alpha plea is like you're pleading, you're admitting your guilt, but you're not, but they have enough evidence to convict you.

SPEAKER_03 25:19

I understand.

SPEAKER_02 25:20

So I'm not pleading guilty, but I'm not pleading not guilty. So I'm like pleading fifth.

SPEAKER_03 25:25

Right.

SPEAKER_02 25:26

And they gave me a ma a cap of 15 years. And I took it because I knew I could get out. But the plea bargains before that was either 50 with parole.

SPEAKER_03 25:38

50?

SPEAKER_02 25:39

50. And then it went down to 40, then it went down to 30. And I was still saying, no, that's way too much time.

SPEAKER_03 25:46

Right. With parole.

SPEAKER_02 25:48

With parole.

SPEAKER_03 25:49

So what's parole in the state of Maryland? What percentage? 50%. 50.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

So then it was 15, and after that, seven and a half. If I did 15 or at 30 or 40, that's 15 or 20 years. Not a lot of time.

SPEAKER_03 26:04

Fucking eh. Yeah. So you took the 15? Yeah, I took the 15. With parole. With parole. How long did you how long were you down before the parole board came knocking? Seven and a half years. Right at seven and a half? Yep. Oh, well, that's good. They drove, they usually dragged your feet.

SPEAKER_02 26:20

They were rated at seven and a half.

SPEAKER_03 26:21

Well, that's good.

SPEAKER_02 26:22

One infraction ticket in seven and a half years.

SPEAKER_03 26:24

Where were you?

SPEAKER_02 26:26

MCIH.

SPEAKER_03 26:27

Where's that?

SPEAKER_02 26:28

Old jail. Hagerstown, Maryland.

SPEAKER_03 26:30

Oh, out to Hagerstown.

SPEAKER_02 26:31

I was in the castle. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 26:32

No shit. Yeah, that's nobody likes it out there. Um for seven and a half years. And what what what happened when you went up for pro I'm sorry? Back up. What was your infraction for?

SPEAKER_02 26:46

Uh made a five-gallon bucket of uh tomato paste wine.

SPEAKER_04 26:50

Tomato paste wine! Give me that. I did that one time.

SPEAKER_03 27:00

Keep draining that shit off and draining that shit off and letting it fucking all yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:04

So the only reason I got caught was that at that time it was it, early 2000s. So at that time I was, what do you say, homophobe? So I've never been around a gay person.

SPEAKER_03 27:17

Oh, wait a minute. So this is in pre jail. Yeah. Okay. So your previous stints in jail before this that we're talking about?

SPEAKER_02 27:28

Never seen it. Never never? Nope. You never seen no fucking booty play. Nope, nothing. It was this No girly men? Nope. Not really? Not in the early 90s. No. No shit. Not until that third bit that I saw a trans woman or a man. Right, right.

SPEAKER_03 27:46

Lady boy or uh whatever you want to call it. Yeah. A bitch. Gumps. A bitch, yeah. There you go.

SPEAKER_02 27:51

There's so many different names you we called them back then.

SPEAKER_03 27:54

Yeah. So I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you. So that this surprises me that you didn't see any of that until your third bit.

SPEAKER_02 28:02

Yeah, but they this one here was just a feminine gay guy, and he was like, I know you got some wine up in there. Will you sell me a I told me get the f I told him get the fucking step and I'm not selling shit to you. And four o'clock the next morning, I got the door popping, and there's six or seven correction officers.

SPEAKER_03 28:21

Oh man.

SPEAKER_02 28:22

Asking me where's my hooch at.

SPEAKER_03 28:25

Did you have any butt?

SPEAKER_02 28:26

No, I drank it all. Because I knew he was gonna go tell on me. And he did.

SPEAKER_03 28:33

Motherfucker. So you was fucked up when they come in there.

SPEAKER_02 28:36

Yeah, I was way over the limit. Like a tomato pigs one.

SPEAKER_03 28:41

Oh, that's disgusting. I threw that shit up, man. It came out of my nose. It felt like it was coming out of my eyeballs.

SPEAKER_02 28:46

I've had the best one out of prison is fruit cocktail. That's really the good one.

SPEAKER_03 28:50

You know what? I had that, but it didn't, it wasn't right. I heard it was better than that. It wasn't so good. I couldn't even join my basketball game. So hey, uh wow, I still can't believe you didn't see no no dick sucking until you third time you were there.

SPEAKER_02 29:08

Yeah, when I went to OJL, that's when I saw it all. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 29:11

Because it's everywhere now.

SPEAKER_02 29:12

Yeah, they had breasts walking around, look like women. And they would use it as eyeshadow and a little blush. Oh yeah, it was but it was still against the rules to have homosexual acts while in prison.

SPEAKER_03 29:31

Yeah, so the thing that weirds me out is like the gangbangers, you know, they're you know, they're doing their thing, they're running business, they're doing whatever they're doing.

SPEAKER_02 29:40

The drug bangers? Oh, yeah. Talking about in prison, but they're the undercover ones, they're getting their dick sucked left and right. Yeah, but they'll be selling drugs in Baltimore, but as soon as they get locked up, they messing with the boys.

SPEAKER_03 29:50

Gay for the stay, baby.

SPEAKER_02 29:52

Crazy.

unknown 29:53

It's true.

SPEAKER_03 29:54

And then come on the street and just act like everything's normal.

SPEAKER_02 29:57

They say, Oh, I'm not gay.

SPEAKER_04 29:59

I'm not gay. I only tasted it twice.

SPEAKER_03 30:08

I was uh I had the pleasure of meeting a couple of the gays. Never had the inclination to get my dick sucked, though.

SPEAKER_02 30:16

No, because they're still a man.

SPEAKER_03 30:18

Yeah, just yeah. Plus, there were women guards. I could just peer at them through the glass and jerk off, you know.

SPEAKER_02 30:26

Oh, you experienced the trans in when you were locked up, didn't you? Oh, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:30

Hell yeah. But it was weird because they gave us paperwork. Because okay, let's go back to you. Fuck me. They gave us the paperwork saying to report it and you know, all this stuff about booty play when you go in and you gotta sign it that you seen, you know what I mean? So but it didn't make no fucking, you know, it didn't make no difference. So they it was kind of undercover where I was like they wouldn't get looking like a girl until it was time to perform. Like they didn't run around with lipstick on.

SPEAKER_02 31:03

Right, I got you.

SPEAKER_03 31:04

You know what I'm saying? All it was was like melt it down fucking an hour later anyway.

SPEAKER_02 31:11

They were undercover.

SPEAKER_04 31:13

Undercover. Oh my.

SPEAKER_03 31:18

So so you did how long did you do on that one?

SPEAKER_02 31:23

I got denied parole. So I did a total time of nine years, eight months, and three weeks on a 15-year sentence. Say that one more time. Nine years. Nine years, eight months, and three weeks.

unknown 31:34

Damn.

SPEAKER_02 31:35

That's the mandatory sentence on 15.

SPEAKER_03 31:38

So you were only denied parole once?

SPEAKER_02 31:40

That was the only parole hangar I got.

SPEAKER_03 31:42

Oh, so then you served out your whatever percent. Yeah, they told me to do it. Did you uh fuck them?

SPEAKER_02 31:50

I didn't like it, but I did. I did. I gotta pay my debt.

SPEAKER_03 31:54

Did you light somebody on fire or something? No. No. Did you do nothing crazy in prison?

SPEAKER_02 32:00

No, that was the only thing, only ticket I had. I worked in the officer dining room and I cooked the warden's lunch for him every day.

SPEAKER_03 32:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:08

I kept good jobs.

SPEAKER_03 32:09

Yeah. That was your last bid, right? Yep. And you've been home ever since.

SPEAKER_02 32:15

Oh seven. Haven't been back since.

SPEAKER_03 32:17

So oh seven. So 20 years. Yeah. Congratulations fucking lations. And you still walk like you've been in prison.

SPEAKER_04 32:24

I'm old.

SPEAKER_03 32:27

Why is that, man? I don't know. Motherfuckers get out, you can still tell. That motherfucker's done time.

SPEAKER_02 32:32

Or if we take pictures, we can really you can tell.

SPEAKER_03 32:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:37

Because y'all do the same fucking pose. Like you're in an 80s rap band.

SPEAKER_03 32:46

Alright. So uh I got some more questions for you. We won't talk. So you didn't did you affiliate while you ran?

SPEAKER_02 32:53

No. I did get approached by the uh DMI.

SPEAKER_03 32:57

I'm sure. I'm sure.

SPEAKER_02 32:58

They said won't you ride with us? I'm like, nah, I came in here by myself. I'm gonna leave by myself.

SPEAKER_03 33:02

And that didn't close, they didn't try and make you?

SPEAKER_02 33:04

No.

SPEAKER_03 33:05

Yeah. I got pressured by multiple people. And just but I was lucky in the fact that I was older. So I didn't get pressured like I I would have if I was a young man.

SPEAKER_02 33:17

But you were in the county, weren't you?

SPEAKER_03 33:19

Yeah, but yes. But I was in the county. So there's only so many facilities that are allowed to house uh federal and um above a certain level of violence because they have a maximum security part portion.

SPEAKER_02 33:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 33:40

So because the feds had a retainer on me, they never charged me, but they reserved the right to charge me until I was already six months in. So I had to stay in basically the supermax wing of a fucking jail. You know what I'm saying? It's fucking stupid. And the fucking the worst thing of it all was COVID. Yeah. Because no visits. I mean, I only did 10 months, but I did 10 months of not seeing anyone's face, not fucking you're completely immersed. You know, there's no brakes, there's no yard most of the time, there's no uh they lock you down 23 hours a day for any fucking thing. And you know, it was it was weird. It was a weird time to be locked up, man.

SPEAKER_02 34:26

Yeah, well, my wife, um when I first started that 15 years, she rode with me for about three years. No shit.

SPEAKER_03 34:35

You were with her then?

SPEAKER_02 34:36

Yeah, she she was coming to see me at Batuxin. That's where I was there first. The Batuxin time. Um, so and one day she came to visit me and I told her, Don't come back here no more. Right. If it's meant to be, I'll see you down the road. Right. Oh me more, but I'm the one that put my put myself there, and I didn't want her to wait the whole time I was gonna be there.

SPEAKER_03 34:59

Dude, that's hard.

SPEAKER_02 35:00

It did, it was hard on me.

SPEAKER_03 35:01

I'm saying you probably made the decision I'd made because it's you you gotta put your mind in a different place. You gotta be a different person to deal with being inside. Yes, you know what I mean, and you don't want that rubbing off on somebody you love and care about on the outside. Just let me do this, let me do what I gotta do to fucking survive this, and then, and you all got back together 26 years later. God damn, bro. That shit is fucking magical.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

Been married four years now.

SPEAKER_03 35:33

Four years. So you all got married right before I got out.

SPEAKER_02 35:37

Yeah, you're uh Michelle and Lil Joe was at my wedding.

SPEAKER_03 35:41

That's right. What month was it? In June, June 4th. Oh, so it was a long time before I got out.

SPEAKER_02 35:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 35:46

That's what's up. I wish I could have been there, buddy.

SPEAKER_02 35:48

I know, I wish you would have been there too.

SPEAKER_03 35:50

How about uh what's the wildest person you met? Like, of all the people you met while you were incarcerated, did you meet any real characters that you liked?

SPEAKER_02 36:01

Um, when I was at the hotel, my next door neighbor was named Arthur Bremer. You may not know who Arthur Bremer is, but Arthur Bremer was the gentleman that shot Governor George Wallace in 1972 when he was running for president.

SPEAKER_05 36:18

What?

SPEAKER_02 36:19

Yeah, Arthur Bremer slept next door to me for three years.

SPEAKER_03 36:22

What kind of conversation do y'all have?

SPEAKER_02 36:24

He didn't really have any conversations. He just played crazy all day.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

He played crazy? Yeah. But he talked at night.

SPEAKER_02 36:31

Yeah, but one night we were Did you throw him a kite?

SPEAKER_03 36:34

Ask him if there was aliens.

SPEAKER_02 36:35

No, this is this is a true story here. All right, come on. They were we were watching uh, what is it, um, Jeopardy. Uh-huh. It came on a question, who was the man that shot Governor Jordan?

SPEAKER_04 36:45

Ugh!

SPEAKER_02 36:45

He was a goddamn Jeopardy answer. And he slept next door to Are you fucking kidding me? That person said, Oh, who is Arthur Bremer? And you could hear him next door giggling loud.

SPEAKER_03 36:58

Man, I hope I live long enough to be a Jeopardy answer, man.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

So he didn't get life. He only got like 68 years, but now Arthur is out and lives in Cumberland.

SPEAKER_03 37:08

No man. No way. Let's give it up for Arthur. Have you seen him on the street? No. No. He's still alive? I believe so. Probably is. How much he does on 63? Like 40? Damn! God bless him. God bless him.

SPEAKER_02 37:31

So yeah, that was uh the most celebrity one I met.

SPEAKER_03 37:34

You know, the first five years or six years of his sentence, they probably fucked with him bad.

SPEAKER_02 37:40

Well, they did fuck with him. I'm talking about the cops. Well, the uh the government used to pack his stuff up every year, take it to the property room, and the government will go to his property to make sure he wasn't writing any notes to write a book.

SPEAKER_03 37:55

Get the fuck out of here. Let the man make a dollar.

SPEAKER_02 37:59

It didn't matter. They did it every year. Every year.

SPEAKER_03 38:02

He should make a book, write a book now. You know, I sent, I wrote every day. That's one of the ways I keep myself sane. I just took a uh a composition book because my wife was a co-defendant, so I was not allowed to contact my wife. No. At all.

SPEAKER_02 38:19

No contact.

SPEAKER_03 38:20

Plus, for the first 60 days I was locked up, she was locked up. So there was no way for me to talk to her. So I wrote every day like I was talking to her. Some days it was fuck you, you know, blah, blah, blah. Some days it was, you know, sad. Some days it was I can't wait till this is over, you know, all kinds of shit. And I mailed it to her. And I haven't read it yet. I'm gonna get some material out of that for sure. Because I know I wrote some ate up shit in there. What was your favorite commissary item?

SPEAKER_02 38:53

Nutty bars.

SPEAKER_03 38:55

I don't even know what that is. We don't even know what a nutty bar is. Just a like uh peanuts all stuck together.

SPEAKER_02 39:01

Oh, yeah, I know what you're talking about. I don't like it.

SPEAKER_03 39:08

I don't know if I'd suck a dick, but I I would sniff a dick for a swift roll.

SPEAKER_04 39:14

Oh my god. I smell it. Smell the end of it. How about that shebangs, man?

SPEAKER_02 39:23

Yeah, they're really good. Fuck yeah. Yeah, especially with a noodle. Oh yeah. Yeah. Chewy fish up in it.

SPEAKER_03 39:29

See, I was gonna ask you, you know, all about the cooking, man.

SPEAKER_02 39:31

Yeah, chili hookups.

SPEAKER_03 39:33

Yeah, yeah. They do my brother, does they do one with um breakfast thing or some kind of shit? I don't know, man. They took they we used to do this thing where they take fucking peanut butter and put between those big cookies you could get.

SPEAKER_02 39:49

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:50

And they would layer them motherfuckers up. And if you were on the tier, you didn't have a uh microwave or nothing. Um so you had to use hot water, put it in a plastic bag and put it inside the water container.

SPEAKER_02 40:00

That's how we cooked our noodles.

SPEAKER_03 40:01

Yeah, no, that's how we cooked our noodles too.

SPEAKER_02 40:03

Or the sink water.

SPEAKER_04 40:05

Yeah, or the sink water. That's right. That's right. You get it, you get fucking cooked. Did you do any drugs when you were in jail?

SPEAKER_02 40:11

Uh a lot of marijuana. Yeah? Yeah. I used to buy uh two-pick cap um, not two-pick, uh chapstick cap. Yeah. Just a cap full for 20 bucks every New Year's Eve.

SPEAKER_03 40:24

Really? Yep. And how'd you smoke it? Like a joint?

SPEAKER_02 40:27

I would roll it. Yeah, that's when we had top papers and I would roll it up.

SPEAKER_03 40:30

So you were allowed to smoke cigarettes then? Yeah. Um, the only thing that I really saw was uh what's the heroin drug? The strips?

SPEAKER_02 40:41

Oh, what are those?

SPEAKER_03 40:42

Suboxins. Yeah. They called it um. Yeah, they called them strippers. They called them uh They'll fuck you up. Yeah, yeah. They would take a little piece of they would take a little piece of one and take a soda like uh off a Pepsi bottle or whatever, and put just a drop of water in it and either put it in their eye or sniff it up their nose.

SPEAKER_02 41:03

Yeah, they'd be fucked up.

SPEAKER_03 41:05

Fucked up. And that little black pieces of paper, what they call that shit?

SPEAKER_02 41:08

K oh K2, you know, oh that's you remember that.

SPEAKER_03 41:12

No, yes, I know. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 41:13

No, they smoke that too.

SPEAKER_03 41:14

Yes. They would go retarded. Like some of them would some of them would freak the fuck out. I'm like, oh, man, I ain't what I want to do with my time.

SPEAKER_02 41:25

Not in there because you're gonna go crazy in there.

SPEAKER_03 41:27

Or somebody gonna kick you, tell you shut up, you know what I mean? Are you a dog guy or a cat guy?

SPEAKER_02 41:33

Both.

SPEAKER_03 41:33

Both?

SPEAKER_02 41:34

Yeah, I have a five and a half-year-old pit bull and I have five cats.

SPEAKER_03 41:38

What's your pit bull's name?

SPEAKER_02 41:39

Lita Ford.

SPEAKER_03 41:40

Well, how about your cat?

SPEAKER_02 41:42

I have uh Finch. He's a show cat. A show cat? Yeah, he's an Egyptian Mao.

SPEAKER_00 41:49

Ooh.

SPEAKER_02 41:49

And then I have Lemmy from Motorhead. Nice. Nikki Six, Ozzy Osborne, and Axl Rose. Those are my other four cats.

SPEAKER_03 42:00

Damn. So you got that's an awesome band. Oh, you need a Tommy Lee.

SPEAKER_02 42:06

I got two girls and four boys.

SPEAKER_03 42:13

Yeah, I need a drummer. Was there a drummer in there? Did I miss it?

SPEAKER_02 42:16

No.

SPEAKER_03 42:16

No. Lita Ford, man. I used to have the biggest crush on Lita Ford. I used to have such a big crush on Lita Ford, I might go fuck your dog. Shit, Joan Jett was hot. Joan Jett was hot, but she was like a little too dikey for me. I was scared she'd step on my balls with high heels. You know what I mean? You feel get that feeling from her? No. No. I used to like things like that. How about cereal, man? What's your favorite cereal? Excuse me. Excuse me. I wasn't telling you to do it. I was expecting it. Cinnamon toast crunch.

SPEAKER_04 42:47

Oh my man. Cinnamon toast crunch.

SPEAKER_03 42:52

I like that one. I like that one. Churros, you ever had those? Yeah. They're good too. Yeah, cinnamon.

SPEAKER_02 42:56

Just regular raisin bran.

SPEAKER_03 42:58

Yeah. With sugar on it.

SPEAKER_02 43:00

Oh, definitely with sugar.

SPEAKER_03 43:01

Yeah, and some kind of fruit.

SPEAKER_02 43:03

Strawberries.

SPEAKER_03 43:05

My dad eats this fucking cereal, man. I'll show you a piece of it after this podcast is over. It's, I swear to Christ, it's like cardboard. It tastes like shit. It chews like shit. It cuts your lips up. It cuts your gums up. He loves it. He's like, it's gotta be good for you. It's so bad, it's gotta be good for you.

SPEAKER_02 43:22

Is that the mini weast?

SPEAKER_03 43:24

No. This is it comes in a brown box with no letters on it. It just says cereal.

SPEAKER_02 43:30

He's old.

SPEAKER_03 43:31

I don't even know where the fuck he gets it. I think it actually comes in a bag, not even a box, like a bag. Oh, so um, since you've been home, you've been home for 20 years. Yeah. What's your favorite place that you visited?

SPEAKER_04 43:50

Keep on rocking in the free world.

SPEAKER_02 43:54

First plane flight I took. I flew from BWI. I flew to Chicago, then Oh, what a horrible airport. That was the first time I experienced a big ass airport.

SPEAKER_03 44:07

Chicago sucks.

SPEAKER_02 44:08

So I was flying to Madison to see my brother.

SPEAKER_05 44:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:14

And it was the first time I ex experienced a plane ride. So that was pretty. Chicago was pretty badass, and Madison was even better.

SPEAKER_03 44:22

Well at Madison, Wisconsin is a nice place.

SPEAKER_02 44:24

And then I got to see a football game with my brother.

SPEAKER_03 44:26

So Where'd you go? Who'd you see?

SPEAKER_02 44:28

Uh the Badgers, Wisconsin Badgers. Oh no shit. Akron Akron. Nice!

SPEAKER_03 44:37

And me and Michelle rented a car. Or maybe we borrowed a car. I can't remember. Because Timmy had friends and shit there. We drove to Green Bay and we watched Brett Favre play at Lambeau. Interestingly. With Timmy, right? Nope, Timmy didn't go. He didn't go. Just me and Michelle. Dude against the Jets, who he played for the next year. Remember the one year he came back and he played with the Jets? Yep. Um, it was so fucking cold, Curtis. I got a beer, and from the stand to my seat, the first like inch and a half I was froze. I ain't even fucking kidding, man. Cold there. And there was people out there with their shirts on. What the fuck is wrong with your nipples could cut glass?

SPEAKER_02 45:22

That's one stadium I would love to experience.

SPEAKER_03 45:25

It made me cry. I'm not even playing. I stood up on the top of it and looked out over, and it was, dude, I uh I was like, yeah, fucking go. Something like that. And everyone got quiet around me and was like, no, we don't do that.

SPEAKER_02 45:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 45:40

We don't cuss here. I was like, whoa. We parked at a gas pump. Like, got out of our car and walked to the stadium, left our car at a gas pump. The whole town shuts down.

SPEAKER_02 45:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 45:50

Fucking amazing, man.

SPEAKER_02 45:51

Same thing with Madison. Same thing.

SPEAKER_03 45:53

Yeah, yeah. The Badgers fucking, I'd love to go to the college atmosphere is cool.

SPEAKER_02 45:57

Yeah, they played that uh between the third and fourth quarter jump, the House of Pain. Yeah. The whole stadium's jumping up and down.

SPEAKER_03 46:04

Yeah, I love that shit. Um, what's your favorite sports teams?

SPEAKER_02 46:10

Um, a local DC guy. So I like the Washington Capitals. I love my Wizards, even though they are are lousy as hell, and I love my Redskins.

SPEAKER_03 46:19

That's what's up. How about um I'm a you know I'm a Skins fan too. I'm glad you said Redskins.

SPEAKER_02 46:25

Baseball and be in between the National and the Orioles. I grew up on the Orioles when they baseball didn't exist in DC. So and now I'm like a Nats fan and a Ourals fan.

SPEAKER_03 46:35

Yeah, I think uh have you been to a Nats game?

SPEAKER_02 46:37

Yeah, I've been there before.

SPEAKER_03 46:39

What do you think about that stadium?

SPEAKER_02 46:41

It's not that bad. It's a little bit big, but it's it's not bad.

SPEAKER_03 46:44

I think what do you think about Camden Yards?

SPEAKER_02 46:48

It's you got that warehouse in the background, it's smaller, it's more you can feel that fan atmosphere in Camden Yards compared to National Park.

SPEAKER_03 46:57

Have you ever been to any other ones? No. Pittsburgh feels a lot like Camden Yards. Really? Um Camden Yards to me is one of the better stadiums because of all the things you just said. It's got that baseball hometown, blue collar feel. The point I'm getting to, Nat's Park feels like commercial, like almost like it's a movie, like it's a a baseball game being played on a movie set. There's fucking advertisements everywhere, and I don't know, man.

SPEAKER_02 47:34

It just doesn't feel like feeling billboard. That's what it was. You like walking, you just see billboards.

SPEAKER_03 47:38

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:39

It's odd.

SPEAKER_03 47:40

And I'm not even saying there's no billboards in Camden Yards, but it doesn't feel like they're in your face everywhere. Yeah. All right. World Cup. Did you are you into soccer at all?

SPEAKER_02 47:51

I can watch it, but not into it.

SPEAKER_03 47:52

Yeah, I'm not really into it neither, but this year I got into it, I have to say.

SPEAKER_02 47:56

Spain won, so beat Messi and Argentina, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 48:00

Yeah, fucking uh how about that three-on-three basketball shit? You watch any of that?

SPEAKER_02 48:04

Sometimes I like to watch it.

SPEAKER_03 48:05

I seen something the other day. There's some guys on there I thought were dead.

SPEAKER_04 48:08

They play there, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 48:12

They're still good too. Excuse me. Um, you see the Red Sox just won 14 in a row.

SPEAKER_02 48:18

Yep, and they were at the bottom of the East just a little about a month ago.

SPEAKER_03 48:22

What the fuck, man? God damn East is tough.

SPEAKER_02 48:26

Orioles got no block.

SPEAKER_03 48:28

I hate this time of year. The sports-wise, like baseball.

SPEAKER_02 48:32

Yeah, it's baseball. Football's just starting in training camps, getting ready mini camps, you know, we're starting to get back into the flow of stuff. Yep. A couple more weeks preseason.

SPEAKER_03 48:42

Yep, that's right. We need we need football because hockey's over. Yep, basketball's over. Um, anything exciting's over except baseball. And baseball's not exciting most of the time. The clock helps, I think, but it keeps it helps keep it moving. Let's see if Izzy will answer the phone real quick. We'll do headlines with Izzy. Sometimes he answers the phone, sometimes he don't. You know what I mean? Sometimes he'd be up in his room. Yeah. That's what he would say. That's what he's gonna answer.

SPEAKER_02 49:20

He told me today you wanted to be on your show.

SPEAKER_03 49:22

I'd love I'd love him to come up. Yo. That's not working. Oh, I don't have any service. Oh, it was going through there, no? Nah, it ain't gonna work. God damn it, Isaiah. I miss you, buddy. If you hear this, I love you, buddy. I miss you. Alright, we'll just keep going. Alright, so we're gonna do uh usually what you you said you listened to the podcast before? Yes. So Isaiah, my cohort, the YN of the of the pair, uh doesn't pay attention. I barely pay attention, like the news and shit. So I run like, do you pay attention? Sometimes I do. Yeah, so you know a little bit of something.

SPEAKER_02 50:13

A little bit.

SPEAKER_03 50:14

All right. So I pick out some headlines, usually ones that aren't real serious, because this is a quote unquote comedy. I I don't care if it's not funny. Like, I like it to be interesting.

SPEAKER_05 50:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:28

But it is a comedy podcast, so we gotta yuck it up a little bit. Um, so I pick out headlines and I read them, and then we talk about I don't even sometimes I don't even know what they mean. I just read them. Alright, so the first one I got is from BuzzFeed. Buzzfeed always got some crazy headlines, man. You know who Shakira is?

SPEAKER_02 50:49

Yeah, Shakira, she's a singer, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:51

Yep. Shakira performed at World Cup halftime show, and everyone is saying the same thing. What do you think they're saying? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 51:05

I think they're saying, let me touch that booty, boo.

SPEAKER_03 51:09

Did you see it? No. Man, listen. Shakira is probably, I'd say, somewhere between 40 and 65 years old. Yeah. She is fucking smoking hot still.

unknown 51:21

Really?

SPEAKER_03 51:22

She did that halftime show. Shake a bong bong, shake a bong bong. I don't know none of the songs, but she looked good doing it. I think they're saying it was amazing. I don't know. Could be wrong. Maybe it sucked. No titties fell out that I seen. So it ain't the best one ever.

SPEAKER_02 51:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 51:37

All right. Ready? We'll move on to the next one. You gotta help me with this one, man. I don't get this one.

SPEAKER_02 51:43

All right.

SPEAKER_03 51:45

This one's an ABC headline. American Broadcasting Company. Woman becomes mom of eight with birth of rare identical quadruplet daughters.

SPEAKER_02 51:59

What? That's four babies, right?

SPEAKER_03 52:02

Right. You want me to read it again?

SPEAKER_02 52:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 52:06

All right. Women. Woman, sorry, woman and women look the same. Women woman. Woman becomes mom of eight with birth of rare identical quadruplet daughters. First of all, can you imagine?

SPEAKER_02 52:25

So she had eight daughters.

SPEAKER_03 52:27

So is it two fours?

SPEAKER_02 52:29

Yeah. She she's not on. Quadruplets.

SPEAKER_03 52:33

Quadruplet is four.

SPEAKER_02 52:34

Right. So she had two sets of fours.

SPEAKER_03 52:36

So identical, two, so she's got.

SPEAKER_02 52:39

She had eight babies. Oh, that's a lot of kids.

SPEAKER_03 52:41

Is that what it's saying? She had eight babies.

SPEAKER_04 52:44

Four of them looked one way and four of them looked another way. Like a goddamn dog. Some of them had spots.

SPEAKER_02 52:52

Four of them came out looking like her, and four came out looking like her old man.

SPEAKER_04 52:56

That bitch had a litter.

SPEAKER_02 52:59

A lot of babies coming at a woman.

SPEAKER_03 53:02

Yeah, man. That poon ain't gonna hold fucking heel up for years. Can you imagine having four daughters that are identical? Yeah. I would shoot my fucking self.

SPEAKER_02 53:17

I've seen women with stomachs with just one baby, and it'd be so damn big. I can only imagine what they look like when she had eight babies in there.

SPEAKER_03 53:25

You'd be fucking her when she's pregnant like whack-a-mole. They probably came out premature. Definitely. They took them out premature. Yeah. I bet. Because they couldn't have been 10-pound babies. No. Fuck no. They ripped her apart. C-section, but yeah. Even C-section, take a four 10-pound babies out of C-section.

SPEAKER_02 53:43

Bobby was in bed rest for a whole nine months.

SPEAKER_03 53:46

Probably. Let's keep saying probably. She probably, her ankles probably look like an oak tree.

SPEAKER_02 53:50

Don't take up from Baltimore. I'm not.

SPEAKER_04 53:53

Her toes look like she curled up. Her titties look like two big pillowcases. Her buttonhole was gaping so big.

SPEAKER_03 54:12

All right. I always do a what I always do a wildlife one. Um so BBC Wildlife. I don't understand what this could be either, so you we have to talk about drone captures Greenland ice tearing open to reveal colossal animal beneath. What do you think it was? The animal. Have you ever seen ice tear? I've never seen ice tear. No. That's a horrible. That's a fucking horrible headline.

SPEAKER_02 54:47

A whale, a blue whale?

SPEAKER_03 54:49

It could be a whale. A whale's an animal. I think it's uh um one of them great big krakens. Maybe the krakens came out.

SPEAKER_02 55:00

Oh, you're talking about the ones where you had the uh the big teeth hanging out on it.

SPEAKER_03 55:04

Yeah, man, a big beak like on have you see the Odyssey yet? No. I bet that's got a kraken on it. Yeah. I'll be cracking on that kraken. Fucking retarded. Um, so what are you doing? Uh I want to talk about one more thing. We were talking about jobs and shit. Tell me about your job. How long did you when when you did the butchering thing? I gotta know about it. How long did you do that?

SPEAKER_02 55:34

Ten years.

SPEAKER_03 55:35

Ten fucking years?

SPEAKER_02 55:36

Yeah, I walked in a door. It was in West Baltimore off of Pennsylvania and Clifton. So that's where they had the riots at.

SPEAKER_03 55:43

Yo, is it blood in the streets?

SPEAKER_02 55:45

No, it's it's not blood. It's a lot of back then it was 2014. So I was walking by and I popped my head and I saw some animals. I was like, You looking for a job? Dead animals. No, they were coming in live off the truck.

SPEAKER_03 55:58

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 55:59

And then the guy was like, hey, you know, this is a slaughterhouse. I was like, all right, what's the slaughterhouse? Mm-hmm. And he took me through the cooler, and all I saw was hanging meat. First thing came to my mind was Rocky.

SPEAKER_04 56:10

Rocky! I was gonna say this.

SPEAKER_02 56:12

First thing you came to my mind, I was like, this is like Rocky.

SPEAKER_04 56:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 56:16

So I ended up getting a job in November of 2014.

SPEAKER_03 56:19

So what'd you do first?

SPEAKER_02 56:21

First, I was shoveling cow poo out in the pens at 12 bucks an hour. Worked my way into inside, learning how to gut a cow, and then I learned how to gut a lamb, gut cat goats. And then I started losing my knife a little bit more and um start cutting cows' heads off and skinning their hit the highs off their heads. So I yeah, I got to see the gore and it's nice. I thought it was pretty, it didn't bother me, you know. I thought it was pretty wild that animal get get their head sliced, neck sliced up, and get hung up.

SPEAKER_03 56:56

Yeah, okay. So walk me through it. I'm a cow. I'm on a truck.

SPEAKER_02 57:03

Get offloaded into the pens.

SPEAKER_03 57:05

Into pens. Yeah. And there's a bunch of other cows in here with me, bumping into me, not giving me my space.

SPEAKER_02 57:11

They had four areas you can put animals, like keep the lambs in one area, up to alley.

SPEAKER_03 57:15

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 57:16

Uh we put steers in there, cows and bulls.

SPEAKER_03 57:18

In the city?

unknown 57:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 57:20

Inside or outside? Inside. It was like a little barn, but as a holding area. And we had air section off in the pens. So I'm a cow.

SPEAKER_03 57:29

I'm a cow. Don't forget. I'm a cow. And I'm I'm in the pen now. Where do I go from the pen?

SPEAKER_02 57:35

We'll run you out of the pen up a chute.

SPEAKER_03 57:38

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 57:39

What if I don't want to go in the chute? Uh I'll I'll use electric one on your ass. All right. I got a cattle prod. That'll get you a going.

SPEAKER_03 57:45

Come on, get me, buddy. Get me.

SPEAKER_02 57:47

So they get a little chute. They run it into the door of the building, open the door, animal slides into a little knocker box. That's what they call it, a knocker box.

SPEAKER_03 57:56

So now I can't move.

SPEAKER_02 57:57

There's no way you can get out of it.

SPEAKER_03 57:59

I got a wall on each side and a door closes behind me.

SPEAKER_02 58:01

Yeah, and the back pushes your ass towards the front so your neck can come out. Don't touch me there.

SPEAKER_03 58:07

When it comes out, what?

SPEAKER_02 58:08

And then they clamp your neck and they stretch it, stretch your neck.

SPEAKER_03 58:13

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 58:13

And then we had a Jewish rabbi, so it was kosher meat. Oh. So we didn't shoot it because unhumane to shoot an animal because you're only killing the brain, you ain't killing the heart.

SPEAKER_03 58:24

Oh god.

SPEAKER_02 58:25

And then it's not kosher when you do that.

SPEAKER_03 58:27

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 58:28

So they would use a rabbi to slice the throat to bleed the animal out.

SPEAKER_03 58:32

So it's kind of alive and just bleeds out and goes to sleep.

SPEAKER_02 58:35

Yeah, about three and a half minutes, yeah. They'll stop kicking and do all this thing, and that's it.

SPEAKER_03 58:39

So that's more humane than a bolt to the brain?

SPEAKER_02 58:42

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 58:43

You think so?

SPEAKER_02 58:44

It is by the USDA, is it? By the government, it is.

SPEAKER_03 58:50

I've killed a lot of animals, man.

SPEAKER_02 58:52

Yeah, me too.

SPEAKER_04 58:53

You've killed more than me, but I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 58:56

Yeah, but it's different when killing deers from out in Caroline County to having an animal come off a truck.

SPEAKER_03 59:03

Right.

SPEAKER_02 59:03

Because then killing a deer, you don't have the government riding your ass.

SPEAKER_03 59:07

Right, but I all I was saying is for a lot of different reasons, like I guess, because you can taste, this is this is some hokey shit, but this is real. You can taste stress in an animal. Okay? So like if I kill a deer that is seen me and is in fight or flight mode, yeah, that deer is texture and the the strongness of its meat is different than if a deer is standing there and never sees me and just goes to sleep. Right. I don't know why. I don't know the science behind it. So do you think those cows are like oh fuck? Or do you think they're just eh?

SPEAKER_02 59:49

Yeah, I think it's like that. Yeah. I think some of them, some of them do fight it. They'll be trying to pull away or they know they're getting ready to So does he come out with like a sword? The Jew. Yeah, he it's probably have a knife.

unknown 1:00:05

Really?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:06

About that long. What is that? About two feet. Does he say anything? Does he like schnack schnack? He says his prayers before he comes down to the slaughter floor.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:15

Oh. And you all got oh, y'all gotta stand back and let him do the deed.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:19

Yeah, and then then it'll have another high rabbi priest who'll come in to check and see if there's any edges on the knife. So it has to be straight. It can't be no ridges in it. That means that animal wouldn't be kosher kill. So the knife has to be, he would run his finger across the edge of it to make sure there was no ridges in it.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:41

What if there's a ridge in it and it killed animals? What happens to it?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:45

It's it's it's not kosher.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:47

Okay, it's not kosher, but what happens to it?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:49

Nothing. We still put it on the groceries. I was gonna say because I don't care if it's kosher. Yeah, it doesn't matter. It's kosher is about money for the Jewish people. Right.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:59

Imagine that.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:00

Anyway. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Rap about make five hundred bucks a a week. Yeah. A day, excuse me, five hundred dollars a day to come in or tax-free money to animals.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:12

I'm converting. I'm converting.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:13

Yeah, me too. Give me a little knife and fucking let me go. Just some tassels hanging off these eye.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:18

Oh, they had those, the curly cubes?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:19

Yeah. Oh, so they were Hasidic Orthodox Jews. Yeah, they lived in Park Ice in Baltimore City. Oh shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:24

That's the ones that my Jewish friend told me were digging tunnels and popping up on people. I believe that. That's what he said, man. He's Jewish. He knows he got the inside track. You know what I'm saying? So after the the cow bleeds out.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:38

They get laid down onto a cradle and they lay it on its back so that they can slice the hair.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:46

Same thing with a goat?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:47

A goat will stay up just like a deer. So you have to skin it like you do a deer.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:53

Uh-huh. You don't do that with a cow?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:56

No, you open his chest cavity first. You gotta be able to open that all up. Okay. They use a little saw and they open his chest cavity. Uh-huh. And then they hang it back up, pull the hide off of it.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:06

Oh, yeah, with the hydraulic.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:08

Yeah, then they'll move it over to another machine where they have a saw. Before that.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:13

You're doing a saw motion like it's a chainsaw.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:15

Oh, it's like a $15,000 handsaw, but it goes so fast and size cut. But they have to open the belly and have to pull out the stomach, the organs.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:25

But we get that, right? We get to eat that.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:27

If you eat that heart or liver.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:29

I mean, in the butcher shop, do you separate that and that gets sold to somebody else?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:34

No. Working for Oline Custom Me Company, they would they told them right out. They did save the livers and and the hearts. Uh-huh. And then eventually they were starting to throw it in because customers didn't want to eat that.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:44

Oh man, that's the best part. Nobody wants to eat no liver. I love liver.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:49

God, it's just disgusting.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:51

It's good. Tastes just like bloody pussy.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:54

Put onions on it.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:56

Yeah. Oh, you gotta make her run around the block. She got your onions.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:03

So after that it gets cut in half. Uh-huh. Gets through the cleaning section area, and then that's where they get all the hair off of it. Then they spray like a vinegar type stuff to preserve the body, the carcass. So that's leather. Yeah, then it gets pushed into the cooling box where I worked at. Oh. There it's 38 degrees in there.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:26

Did you say 10 years or tenure? Tenure.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:29

Nice. So I did 10.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:31

Did you get your GED? No. Damn it. Tenure is a GED word, buddy. I don't need no GED 54. All right. Let's see. Go ahead. I'm good. So they put it in the cold box, that's where you will.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:43

You let it chill for like 24 hours and then it gets broken down to a four-quarter and a hine. And then you guys ship it out as four quarters and a hind to the Yeah, and they'll go to O-line to the processing plant, and then they'll break it down to briskets, Chucks, Delmonicos, and all the rest of uh damn.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:00

What all no pigs?

SPEAKER_02 1:04:01

Just go pigs. Yeah. No, I would love to see a pig be slaughtered. I would think that'd be pretty cool.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:07

Look, man, um, I don't want to go too much longer, but I I uh saw a couple crazy things in my life when it comes to slaughtering things, because just living in the country, you see people buying, selling, killing, all kinds of shit. This guy one time came to a friend of mine's house and bought a goat alive. And he was in a car. And he had a buddy with him, and he buys this goat, and we're like, okay, what are you doing with this goat? Like, he was in a car. So the guy gets out of the fucking car and he clubs this goat over the head. Blink, blink, blink, hit it four or five times, knocks it stupid, knocks it dead, and he cuts a little slice in the side of its hide, and he pulls this long ass hollow, like uh almost like a curtain rod out of his car trunk, and he sticks it in there and he starts blowing in it and moving it around and blowing in it. And he blows the hide off this fucking goat, man. Really? Really? I was I could I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it. Just use the air from blowing in it to like separate that, you know what I mean, the membrane in between while it was just fresh dead, so it was still warm.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:24

Soon as he got it all blowed off there, he had the coat off that goat in seconds and corded up and in the car and gone.

unknown 1:05:31

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:31

So I was like, and then they were uh they were Middle Eastern of some kind.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:36

Yeah, that's where you eat those. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:38

So then on the same farm, they had a uh a pickle vat, like a big uh almost like a silo that was cut off and it was full of water, probably six feet deep. They took this pig, this guy came and bought this pig, and they put it in his pickle vat. The pig. And you can't get it, it couldn't get out. Right. You know what I'm saying? So it's swimming around. Pig can swim. Yeah. Swimming around, swimming around. So I'm like, what the fuck are we doing here watching this? Why the fuck did you put it in there? And he said, watch. Sure enough, it was a while, but the pig was swimming and it's its legs were so short, it was hitting the side of itself like this. And it real fast, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He cut his own fucking throat eventually. Wow. And because his heart was going so fast, it pumped all the blood out of his body. The guy said, That's the best ham you'll ever have. Really?

SPEAKER_04 1:06:34

Yes, sir. What are we doing?

SPEAKER_03 1:06:38

That's crazy. Yeah, man. You ever see anything crazy like that? No. What'd you all do with the heads?

SPEAKER_02 1:06:45

Well, um, we were bone them out. So the cheek meat on steers and cows, they use that as beef cubes. So, but usually Latinos were coming by the whole head without boning them out, and they would sell the whole head for like 50 bucks. And they'd take it home and boil it out. And they say that's the best meat, and it's in the brain.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:07

Did the tongue stay in it?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:09

Yep, the tongue too. The cow tongs good, man. No, I'm not. Don't want to eat that. You ever had a b um bull ball?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:17

Oh yeah. In Colorado, they eat the shit out of them.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:21

You ain't never had them? Nope. Why? You know what it tastes like? You won't like it. It kind of tastes like a lighter liver. I dip it in ranch dressing.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:30

Well, you take the you take the lining off of it, then you slice it.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:35

I didn't ever prepare it. I just ate it. But yeah, that's how they did it. They breaded it and fried it. Right. And it was like chips. And it had like a like a soft liver consistency.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:45

What's the word for that?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:46

Uh Rocky Mountain Oysters. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:49

I don't know where the fuck they get that from.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:50

I can't imagine putting a whole one in your mouth though, man. Bull balls are big. Yeah, they're really fucking big.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:57

Coming off of 2,500-pound animals. How you get them off?

SPEAKER_03 1:08:00

You sheing?

SPEAKER_02 1:08:01

Yeah, you cut them right off. Yeah. Slice them right off the dick. Yep.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:07

It's making me hard. Um, is there anything else you wanted to talk about while I got you on here, brother?

SPEAKER_02 1:08:12

No, man, I'm good.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:14

Man, I am happy to have known you. I love Timmy too, man. Timmy's been one of my best friends for a long time.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:19

Yeah, he's my um, he's my little brother, but he's also my best friend in the whole world. You know, me and him we've been through a lot in our lifetime, and um he's always been there for me when I needed someone. Even when um even now to this day, if I need someone to talk to him, I can do his call and talk to him about anything in the world.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:39

That's fucking great, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:40

So he's my best friend in the whole world, you know. I talked to him today about coming on here with you. So he's like, man, just have a good time, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:49

Yeah. It's been alright, right? It's been fun.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:51

Yeah, it's been fun.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:52

Cool, man. Thanks for coming on, brother. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:54

I love you inviting me. I love you.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:59

All right, guys. Uh I had to get a hug on the air, fuck it. Um, so what is today? What's today's date? Today is the 21st, so this will come out on the 23rd. Uh I think my next show, I'm doing a uh man, I'm ill-prepared on this. I'm I'm judging a contest or something on August 2nd or 3rd. It's a Sunday at Dream Big Venues. Uh Baltimore Comedy Festival coming up the last week of August, August, first week of September, September 4th, my birthday. I'm hosting a Baltimore Comedy Show Festival somewhere in the city, Baltimore Comedy Festival show. I fucked that all up. Somewhere in the city, um, venue to be determined. Uh that Sunday is the uh I guess this Friday is the fourth, fifth. So the sixth, Sunday, the sixth is the closing ceremony at the Port Comedy Club. There's shows all over the city that whole week. So please come out, support, have a good time. Thanks for coming on, Curtis.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:02

Well, you're welcome. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:03

All right, brother, later.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:05

Later, making the perfect trade must get kick reality. Man, you've been doing all this dope and dudes and you ain't had a chance to show them what time it is. So what do you want me to do?

SPEAKER_00 1:10:46

And now we're gonna correct it.