SPEAKER_00 0:11

Welcome back to Besties from the Chamber. We're coming out from San Pablo here in the Islam area. My name is Vanessa.

SPEAKER_05 0:22

I'm Anne. And I'm Jasmine.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

And we're besties from the church.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

And we have two special kids. Very special. We have Miguel Monoz, who usually is the one behind the computer, making the wheel. So manager, my bestie. So welcome, Miguel.

SPEAKER_02 0:45

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

We have Jasmine's fiance here visiting us from his work that he took a break from just to come and record this podcast. So welcome, Jose.

SPEAKER_04 1:03

We're shy.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

You actually have to talk into the mic.

SPEAKER_02 1:08

Hello.

unknown 1:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

As you guys can tell, we're not used to vocing.

SPEAKER_01 1:16

Alrighty. Let's get into it.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Yes, we're coming. I'm not gonna be speaking very much because of my voice, but um we are coming to speak about a very touchy subject. Miguel, what is our topic today? Since you're here.

SPEAKER_02 1:31

Our expected roles.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

Gender roles.

SPEAKER_02 1:34

Yes, gender roles specifically.

SPEAKER_00 1:36

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:37

In our families and in church.

SPEAKER_00 1:39

In every aspect. So I'm gonna start off with a quote that I've always that I got when I was married to my husband, and I really am very fond of it. It's behind every successful man there is a strong woman. And that is said by Eleanor Roosevelt. And I do feel that it is true. So, you know, where every man is created by God, and woman is created by man by God as well, in the same image. Like in Genesis 1.27, it says, So God created man in his own image, in the image of God, he created him, male and female, he created them. So this is where I think that both were created as one. Does that make sense, guys? Yes. Yes. So coming with that, um I can see both sides. I was um taught to always, my dad always taught me there's three truths to every story, right? His, hers, and the actual truth. So I'm more of a medium type of person. I can see everybody's side. Um, I try not taking sides, but sometimes I do. Sometimes I can be that cheese mosa, you know? But it works out sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 3:03

You're that person in the meme that's um vacuuming their front yard.

SPEAKER_00 3:07

Oh, yes. All the cheese men in the front.

SPEAKER_01 3:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:10

No, I'm more of the window kind of girl. I don't have to be out in the front.

SPEAKER_05 3:14

I'm the one in the vacuum outside.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

But yes, you guys. So I am gonna start off with that. That everything is created equally by God. Another verse that I would like to go to is Matthew 19. Um, sorry guys, I kind of lost my spot here. And I have bookmarks and everything, and I'm still lost. Aren't we all? Matthew 19, 6. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. So when when someone joins in marriage, God brings them together into one flesh. He does not keep them separate, and he does not have a uh hierarchy here, right, guys.

SPEAKER_01 4:08

Well, that's a very common uh Bible verse at weddings. I think that we've all heard it at a wedding or two. And so yeah, it's just you know, the um the biblical way of, you know, uniting two people, um, like you say, like to become one flesh, because it does say in the Bible, you know, um, a man will leave his father and his mother and he will be with his wife.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:31

You know, that's what biblically it says, and that's what um people who are married hope that that will happen. We don't have any nosy mother-in-laws.

SPEAKER_05 4:51

Sorry, babe, but I do have one of those appointments.

SPEAKER_00 4:54

I had one too, but make sure you rest in peace. No. I'm being nice, definitely.

SPEAKER_01 5:05

Yeah, so you know, it it there is um, you know, families have a lot to do with how you're no your marriage works or doesn't work, you know. That uh I think that that affected a lot the destruction of my marriage, you know, was the the in-laws. And the in-laws.

SPEAKER_00 5:23

Michael, you knew them. You know what's crazy is that I just um heard that from a psychiatrist that she was like, How do I as a single mother teach my son or my kids to be respectful with their um within their marriage and with their partners? And she's like, it's not what you can teach, it's what you show them.

SPEAKER_04 5:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:46

So it's the way the father comes home and respects the wife and takes care of the wife, and the way the the wife takes care of the husband. And that's how the children learn. And it's not by us sitting down, oh, you have to do this for your wife and you have to do that for your husband. It's what we can show them as parents, as husband and and wife.

SPEAKER_01 6:07

And I think that as single moms, it's harder. Yes. You know, I think that your your kids were able to see um an example of that, even though I think Asul maybe was too little.

SPEAKER_00 6:16

Asuna and Christian, they kind of blocked a lot of it out. Yeah. Even though there were, I think, what, six and yeah, that's too little. Yeah, they they blocked a lot of it out. But the older kids know. And I see it in their relationships, the way they are with their girlfriends.

SPEAKER_01 6:31

So I think that's harder for you know, a single mom to how we how are we supposed to emulate, you know, a father, you know, uh when we play both roles, you know.

SPEAKER_00 6:41

Um, but I'm lucky I have Michael and he he's a really good Michael and um Miguel, sorry, Miguel and Marita have an amazing relationship.

SPEAKER_01 6:49

Yeah, and so you know, um Caleb says that you know his no no is his best friend. And so I know that I'm I'm good that I have him to show him what a a good male role model is supposed to be.

SPEAKER_00 7:02

So and it's nice because sometimes like the the kids they they come and they're like, Oh Ma, Marita and Miguel are kissing. So what they're missing.

SPEAKER_05 7:13

I have never seen you guys kiss.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

We don't do it that often, guys. And then Hassan would be like, is that what you and dad would talk? Like, yes, we were very affectionate. And they're like, and then Maritza's like, we were just whispering to each other.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

That's what we're calling.

SPEAKER_05 7:34

Yeah, my kids they still get kind of grossed out. Now Sienna, when we're kissing, she has to get in between us.

SPEAKER_04 7:41

So she could be in the kiss.

SPEAKER_05 7:45

She's like me too. Yeah. When it comes to like the role models as as parents, right? Um, when it comes to mind, I I'm so far apart from my sisters, so I saw I I didn't see the how bad of a relationship my dad and my mom had. Because I as what I just las historias that I was hearing from my sisters and family members and everything, they were not all great. Um but in my eyes, my dad is totally different. My mom is totally different of the stories, you know. Um my mom I saw like a Mexican tradition woman in La Casa. She was a housewife, and my dad was the one that brings in the bread. Um, but regardless of the flaws and anything, um, I think I did find I see my my my dad and my fiance. Because we had our fights and everything, uh adventures, like my dad, any kind of man, you know, now you Miguel, you're you're an angel. But like yeah, like I see him, but my dad era muy trabajador, take care of his family regardless, you know, financially and all that stuff, being there for my mom and for us, I see him. So, and I think I am. I'm getting married to somebody that's kind of familiar to my dad.

SPEAKER_01 9:11

Oh that's good. Well, I think that um that this subject is very touchy because you know, I I'm a uh a very big feminist, and um, but I also think that there are some things that only men should do, you know, but it's a really touchy subject for a lot of people, you know, like to um distinguish between the the two gender roles, you know, what is the the role of a male and what is the role of a female in our home and in church? Um so you know, um biblical gender roles generally emphasize that men and women are created equal in value and they bear the image of God together, yet they're designed with distinct complementary roles in marriage and with a church. Uh, those key principles include, you know, husbands as sacrificial leaders, you know, loving like Christ, and wives as supporting helpers, even though sometimes that helper for some women is like a hard thing to get over. And that's like submitting to your husband. You know, that's what we talked about last time with submission. And so that was a little bit hard to talk about because you know, you know, we don't always want to submit in certain ways, I guess, to our to our husbands or to anyone, basically. Um how do you guys, Jasmine and Jose, you know, see these gender roles in your home and in your marriage? It's still hard.

SPEAKER_05 10:46

We're still working on it. Still working on it. Um, before the um we started recording our podcast, we were actually talking to my beautiful besties here. Um I just wanted to them have an idea of what my fiance thinks because they only hurt me when I go and vet with them. So take it away, babe.

SPEAKER_02 11:13

What do you feel about?

SPEAKER_03 11:15

How do you feel?

SPEAKER_02 11:16

Putting you on the spot.

SPEAKER_03 11:18

No pressure, baby. I'm on the hot seat now. Wow.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

Um it's um he was more vocal when we were talking about this earlier.

SPEAKER_05 11:33

With what verse? Your verse. That you that that you think that's it's uh related to the subject.

SPEAKER_03 11:39

Oh, okay. Oh, can you uh I don't know how to say the word.

SPEAKER_00 11:44

He's looking at his phone. It's a verse I have. Oh, can you say it on it's a it's a name?

SPEAKER_01 11:51

Ecclesiastes?

SPEAKER_00 11:52

Yes, I could not even say that.

SPEAKER_03 11:56

Ecclesiastes. Chapter four, verse nine through twelve is two are better than one. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. The one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. And that uh that verse speaks to me because uh when it comes, especially with uh with when it comes to children, uh our children, they uh they usually try to gang up on us like separately. But when we stand together as a couple, and you know, this is whether it be discipline or stuff, decision making, you know, it's it's very it's very strong when we stand together because yeah, we do over are very very firm on our decision and and they even though there's more of them, they understand that the power dynamic of you know the relationship over their parents and they have to follow our lead. And it's uh it's a little hard sometimes because I we there is a difference of opinion sometimes between us. But overall it's uh you know, at the end of the day we have to come to an agreement on a lot of the things at home and it helps them when you have the the voice of God and you know the the Bible verses to help guide you through, you know, kind of those kinds of situations.

SPEAKER_05 13:14

Yeah, for sure. I think is I think in our situation it's still a little hard because at the end of the day we could come in agreement, but before that it's it's uh it's a fight or um it's just so chaotic and stuff. I think it's because he's still I think okay. Um for him, I think is the power that is overtaking him. And for me is that I feel like he's taking my voice away, and that's taking me from actually being a team.

SPEAKER_01 13:50

So um I read um this Bible verse, it's Ephesians 5, 21 through 33, and it says about Christian households, and it says, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. So the two of you submitting to each other. Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body of which he is a savior. Now, as a church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands and everything. And I know that might be a little bit jarring to you, Jasmine, because I know that sometimes the verbiage that is used isn't like the nicest, but it's not as as bad, you know. So it's like what we talked about last time when we were talking about submission. It's not that the man wants to hold power over the woman, you know, and the woman just has to like sit there and take it. No, it's that the that the man leads you and treats you just like Christ would treat the church, which is with love and respect, and is going to lead you and guide you. That's what it means. And us as women need to submit to our husbands, how by also treating him lovingly and with respect. But it's mutual respect. It's not just, you know, like, oh, you, you, you know, you are a woman, I am man, you listen to me, you know. Oh, you know, like no. Like it's you know, it's it's a mutual kind of love and respect. Because that's what God told Jesus to come and give to us. You know, He He God loves us, you know. I mean, who everybody in this world can say that somebody was willing to die for them and did. Why? Because Jesus Christ did that for us. So that alone tells us how loved we are by our God. You know, so He wants us, He wants the men to be able to treat their wives with love and respect, and the same love and respect given from your wife to your husband. So that's what it means. It doesn't mean like you submit now, you know, like no. There's love and respect that comes from that. Husband loves your wife Jesus Christ of the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. I mean, uh there are some men that are very, you know, macho, you know. Um, they're not gonna beat themselves up. So why are they gonna do the same thing to their wives? You know, some men treat their bodies as like their temple, some women do, you know. I'm not gonna say that it's just men, and you know, treat their bodies like, oh, soy un dios, acá, you know, like you know, but then you're gonna go and treat your wife like crap, you know, you're gonna go and talk down to her, and you know, like, no, that's not what God wants us to do.

SPEAKER_00 17:04

And in every verse that you're saying, what I have noticed is that for the woman to submit as much as the men need to submit, yes, woman.

SPEAKER_01 17:13

Yes, yeah. So uh let me see. Uh after all, no one ever hated their own body. That's true. But they feed and care for their body just as Christ does the church, for we are members of his body. For this reason, a man will leave his father and his mother and be united to his wife. Again, we've heard that verse several times, right? And the two will become one flesh. So, like, I mean, God wants us to have that unity with our partners, you know. And I think marriage is a despite all the my contradictions that I always say that you know, I'm never gonna get married again. Um, being married to the right person, you know, it's it's it's a wonderful and beautiful thing, you know.

SPEAKER_03 18:04

Um when it when it comes to that, like that whole verse that you just said, like the pretty much the the thing that a lot of people don't grasp is the core thing is to be selfless. And that's to you know, to have priority of others over yourself. That's what a lot of people have, I think, problem with today is that they don't know selfless, they just know selfishness. It's all about me, me, me. And when it comes to a marriage, it's about being selfless, about thinking about others and your other than other than yourself. Meaning you have responsibility over others, yeah, not just yourself.

SPEAKER_00 18:36

That is all well said.

SPEAKER_03 18:38

And that is that is a priority in a marriage. Like, you know, we I have responsibility over my uh my fiance and my children, and she has responsibility of me and the kids as well. And a lot of people don't realize that that it's not about like what what you can do for me, it's what you can do for others.

SPEAKER_01 18:55

That is very beautifully said.

SPEAKER_05 18:57

And we're we're there. I think um we do take of each other, take care of each other, and we take care of our kids.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

Um I would hope so.

SPEAKER_05 19:08

We we do, it's just sometimes we go about it very instead of being just simple, is either him or myself, we make it difficult. But again, at the end of the day, we are there for our kids.

SPEAKER_01 19:23

And it's all about the foundation that you have, you know. Um like I said, you know, uh uh it's easy for a woman to submit to a man that has a mission, you know. And so if that man's mission is to follow Christ and like you said, be selfless, you know, then it's easy for a woman just to submit to them. Because why? Because like you, Jasmine, you told us right now, you know, you feel safe. Yeah, you feel safe with Jose, and that's so important. Because if you don't, si no sientes es el respaldo, like why are you going to even try? You know, but it's there. That foundation is there. That foundation of love and respect in God's word, then you have everything. Anything else, like I said, you know, like all the there's gonna be problems, there's gonna be bad stuff, there's gonna be bad influences, there's gonna be bad friends, there's gonna be bad family, you know? And but as long as you guys have that foundation there, it doesn't really matter.

SPEAKER_00 20:20

Putting God, putting God in the middle of your relationship.

SPEAKER_05 20:24

You know what? I even though that me and him, we didn't have a relationship all these 14 years we're on and off. Um I did have God. I always have faith. And I always we used to tell him all the time, I have faith that you know we are meant to be. And he will tell me, Oh, you're delusional and delusional and delusional, but I don't understand. So, and I kept on telling it, it's faith. Like, I have faith that you're gonna come. And I will tell him, like, straight out, like, yo, I'm gonna be honest and be like, I have faith that you're gonna be with me. And I'm holding into that faith. And yeah, sometimes he would tell me, like, well, you know, keep on holding, like sometimes not that way, but for me to keep on holding on to it, but he was not gonna tell me straight out.

SPEAKER_03 21:14

You see, I would to to clarify, I I would call it delusion at the time because it's not something I wanted at the time. So she wanted it, but I didn't. So I would pretty much tell her straight out, like I I do a lot of the times. I'm just a straight out person. I would tell like you're delusional when it comes to that because that's what I thought at the time. You know, I d I did not see myself with her at the time. So that's what I thought it really was. She saw it another way because she still had, like she said, faith. And I just didn't have that faith in us at that time. But yes, here we are after so many years, and you know, her perseverance pays off. Right? It does.

SPEAKER_02 21:57

She's a toxic

SPEAKER_01 22:02

But it's you know, uh, you know, as far as just like like gender roles, it's like what is it that us females look for in a man? As far as like to be like um not only our leaders in our household, but like in church. And I just mentioned to y'all earlier that like you know, I'm a big feminist, but I do believe that women shouldn't be pastors in churches. And I know that's very controversial. Please don't come after me for me saying that, but I really, really do believe that. You know, um I I whenever I do feel like if somebody is like preaching to us that is like a female, it makes me feel a little uneasy. Um, I don't know why. It's just always I've always felt that way.

SPEAKER_05 22:49

It's like how sea always says that we as women we live with emotion. So I think that if uh if it was a woman pastor, I think she will be preaching with emotions instead of actually um I was just thinking. But when a man is speaking to me, it's not speaking to me as the as him being a man. I'm speaking like if God is actually speaking to me. If I hear a girl is like, uh, okay, girl, I've been there, you know, I know how you feel because she's talking with emotions.

SPEAKER_01 23:22

See, and I disagree with that. I disagree with that because it's we were just talking about politics, you know. I'm not gonna get into politics, okay? But you know, people, you know, say that, you know, oh, it's because women can't lead a country or whatever. And I'm I'm like, well, you know, we talked about Queen Elizabeth, you know, in in England, and she led the country for a long, long time, you know. And so like I think that women can lead. Not all women are as emotional. I do think that, yeah, we can be emotional sometimes. But I think that there's some good examples of female leaders that for the sake of their state, you know, have to put that aside. But I guess, you know, now that I think about it, it's just like it's different because, like, I mean, she grew up that way, you know, Queen Elizabeth uh she grew up that way. So she was raised. She was raised to think that, you know, she was raised that you have to put the state of your country before yourself. You know, so I guess there's a difference in that, you know, being born to that and raised into it and maybe just falling into it, you know, you like arguing or politics and stuff, you know. I mean, I guess there's there is a difference there.

SPEAKER_03 24:40

There's definitely a difference because there's a difference of like you getting the position because you were appointed or before somebody who was born into it and getting groomed into that position and getting taught at a very age, this is what you're gonna become. So it is it is literally handed to them from the beginning, like this is what you're gonna be, and this is how we're gonna lead you that way. And it took the whole family to make that happen. Right. There was a bunch of mentors and a bunch of other things, and that's that's really the difference when it comes to that. Like, you know, if you get led in that path, like with nuns who you know do the believe that that's their calling, and it's you know, that they end up sometimes at positions of power because you know they they were put there, right? But but but they were led there to have that position. So it's all about you know, if you can manage it.

SPEAKER_02 25:29

I I think some sometimes it's it's a challenge, even for people that have the example, to to be the role model for your family. It is a challenge because sometimes, like Ann said, sometimes you don't have that role model. So who do you follow? You know, and I think the biggest role model that we have is Christ Himself. You know, that's the biggest model that we need to follow. What did he do for the church? He died, you know, to restore it. So that's our biggest example that we that we should follow. Is it hard? Heck yeah, it's not easy. Um, but we have to take it a step at a time. We're gonna stumble, we're gonna fall, we're gonna trip, but Christ is always there to lift us back up.

SPEAKER_05 26:11

What about uh a woman pastor that that woman has that was actually born in the church? Like though grew grew up with the church, everything. Would you still feel the same way? Not able to be a woman pastor, then I think so.

SPEAKER_02 26:28

I I think the biggest challenge on that is I mean, it's it's in the Bible that that a pastor should be a male, you know, because one thing is yes, like you said, um, females do tend to react with emotions a lot. And men can you talk about just here and and men And I'm over here raising my hat and men tend to be very calming, very like cool-headed. We don't react before before the situation happens. We analyze a situation and look at our best way where people won't get affected, not be like, oh well this lady hit my son. I'm gonna go off on her. It's like, no, like, well, what happened? This and that, and like just seeing that situation, figuring out what the best result is with a level head. And sometimes it's really, really hard.

SPEAKER_01 27:20

Yeah, we're still I think that's a horrible example because I think I mean, I I don't know. Anyone touches my baby, and of course I'm gonna go off on them, you know?

SPEAKER_05 27:34

Yeah, but that's at a different that's different, but we are but right there, you acted in emotion instead of just be co-hered and be like taking the action the correct way and adjusting emotion that's gonna get you in trouble too. That's that's a difference. The guys have all these plans, going through all these plans, like everything in their head, you know, right away we took the action and not being smart about it.

SPEAKER_03 28:03

Uh I think the biggest difference, like in a woman pastor and a male pastor, because I see I've seen it sometimes. So I've seen uh videos and stuff of like where in like when the pastor gives his sermon or like you know, uh uh a reading, stuff like that, like he'll give just like the point and what he's trying to he's trying to what he what he's trying to make a point of and like the verse. And sometimes the women kind of drift off with like personal experiences or something that they heard or something that had happened. And I think that's like where the where the diversity happens, or like you know, it's like when you go to church, you go to hear the word of God, like you know, what what are you trying to learn from the verse or the sermon that the pastor's trying to give, not hear somebody's other personal experience of what they believe it is. So I think that that's something that that's my opinion of like what the difference might be between the gender roles of a pastor.

SPEAKER_00 28:53

And and I think you might be right in that sense where us women, we tend to like even just with this podcast, like we tend to want to um what is it not communicate, but um relate to somebody. We we want some type of connection. And whether it's with like a friendship and a relationship, we just want to have that connection. And I think that's where we tend to do make it more personal and just keep it personal when men don't really personalize their their issues or um certain commitments, they're just okay, we're gonna do this, and then they do it. They're really surface-based, I guess you could say. Um, and that is one thing that I have noticed. And right now, Jose, that you're saying that I do think you're you're right in that sense that women do try to connect in in that um type of sense where they just want everybody to know how they felt, and they want they want to know how you felt as well.

SPEAKER_01 29:51

So I I think I think a lot of women seek validation. Yeah, is that what it is? Yeah, is that what it is?

SPEAKER_00 29:58

Even like how we were just talking about Genesis, um, where um Adam and Eve were created, and where God had spoken to Adam to tell him to go to um, they put him in the in the garden, and they told him you can eat from every tree, but the the tree of knowledge, um that's the only tree that you cannot eat, and it's in the middle of the of the do you want to explain it, I guess the forbidden tree the forbidden tree. Oh, yeah. So we were talking about that in the beginning. Yeah, so in um in the beginning.

SPEAKER_01 30:33

Sorry, it's because my voice is in and out. Um, yeah, so you know, when God created Adam, he created Adam in his image, right? And so, you know, God was trying to find, he didn't want man to be alone. So, you know, he was looking for companion for him. Of course, he wasn't gonna, you know, put him with an ox or with a bird or with, you know, some other livestock that God created.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

Because he was naming the animals at the end.

SPEAKER_01 31:01

Right, he was, yeah. So, you know, what did he do? Put Adam to sleep, took his dream, and created woman in Adam's image. And so, you know, when we we always, I know this is like a another super touchy subject, but like where we say, you know, um, Eve was the one that ate from the tree, right? But it was God that told Adam, you know, you're not supposed to eat from this tree. You know, Eve wasn't created yet. So when um when Eve ate from the tree, we assume that Adam told her, you know, God said, Don't eat from this tree. You know, we can only assume that he he told her that. But of course, as as women do, we don't listen. And so, but you know, you know, she fell under the influence of the snake, you know. Um, and so what happened? We all know what happened, you know. Um, once they saw themselves, it was, you know, they they realized that they were naked and ashamed, you know. But before that, before the the whole snake thing happened, you know, Adam and Eve were able to be with each other and they were naked and they were not ashamed, you know. And I really think that that's very um important because when you are with your partners, you know, you are unashamed. You are able to be the person that you are. We are able to, in a sense, be naked with each other in many senses. And it's okay because we're with the person that God wanted wants us to be with, you know, and so that nakedness should be there, that unashamedness. Is that a word? Yeah, should be should be there, you know. But once sin did come in, you know, then everything changed.

SPEAKER_00 32:58

And it goes back to the communication, right? It should have been communicated. I feel like Adam should have communicated a little bit more with Eve and been like, oh, yeah, see, ladies, even in the beginning, men were not listening. No, I'm kidding. Should have been like, hey, sweetheart, you know, if somebody comes and talks to you or there's any type of issue within the relationship, come talk to me first before you you do something, you know? Let's let's talk about whatever so we can deal with the issues together. And instead of her hearing from the serpent and being like, oh, let me go talk to Adam and see what he thinks, she's like, oh no, the serpent's right. So I think it's just based off communication and the way we deal with our relationships and the way we deal with um with everything in our lives, you know?

SPEAKER_05 33:44

Okay, well, this is a question for Jose and Miguel. Oi, oh my god. I know, I know Jose because that's the debate forever.

SPEAKER_00 33:54

But let me ask Miguel on the Well, we would like to hear Joseph.

SPEAKER_05 33:59

But I wanna I want Jose to hear Miguel first.

SPEAKER_04 34:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 34:04

What is you already know the role of a man because you have been so familiar with the Bible? Before you were all with the familiar with the Bible and getting married to Maritza, what was your role as a man back then? What was your mentality that a man role was supposed to be?

SPEAKER_02 34:28

Well, I will be honest with you. My before coming into Christ and everything was my mentality is like, okay, I'm the man, I make all the decisions, and the woman followed my decisions. You know, and I learned through Christ that that's not the way, that's not how he wants us to lead. He wants us to lead by unified, by being unified. Um, by listening to each other, uh, communicating. We don't have to agree all the time, because that's normal. We are human and we are completely different. We have different mentalities, but at the end of the day, we have to look at the common goal. And the common goal is Christ. You know, so any decision that we make decides, like, okay, like this decision, does it honor God? It's like, oh, we decide to ignore our kids. Is that honoring God? No. Because God wants us to make sure that we're taking care of our family. It's the same thing with the with the church. Uh it and it is a big challenge, like I said, because a lot of people assume, especially the big macha ones, the the middle middles are like, oh no, well, my chicharronos are the only ones that crack here. And it's like, no, like you might make the final decision of everything, but you need to take your wife into consideration because it's not just you being affected, it's your whole family.

SPEAKER_05 35:56

Okay, so now what is your opinion? Be honest, be honest.

SPEAKER_03 36:04

I agree with him on that, and that's the way it should work. Communication is key in every relationship, and like he said, as long as you put God as the the one that you need to follow and you know, follow his word, everything should work out. But again, they have to make the decision together, not just because one says something, the other one doesn't want to do it, doesn't mean that's that's how it works. It has to be together as a unity. So we have to come to an agreement and follow that agreement together, not just because I say or you say, and then the other person doesn't do it. That doesn't make it right because that's the key is to have that unity. So through both of us, this is gonna work, and through the word of God, and through you know, God's guidance and you know his word is that we have to follow.

SPEAKER_02 36:56

And a lot of patience.

SPEAKER_00 36:59

So I do have a question for you, Miguel. Coming now that I see your guys' relationship, and maybe this might help Jasmine and Jose as well. Is both of you guys submitted to your guys' relationship, you and Maritza. So, how do you guys submit, follow each other, and still be able to have your independence, still feel like both of you guys have your voice? Because I think that's where I lost myself in my relationship. I felt like I submitted way too much that I lost myself, but yet we had an amazing relationship. And I think that's where they're trying to find their places. Like, where do we submit to where we don't lose our voice and our independence?

SPEAKER_02 37:42

I think the the biggest issue there is the the it's not just letting them speak and and and oh, you this is what you think, this is what I think. It's like, no, actually listening, paying attention to their concerns and and analyzing everything. In a relationship, you have to analyze everything. Um when Marita and I got together, it wasn't Hearts and Flowers. Uh no, of course not. You know, it was a very big challenge because she's a very independent woman and I'm a very independent man to a certain extent. Uh I have certain things that I was like, oh, you know, that I that I learned that as an every couple, um, but you know, the biggest thing is make sure that when you guys are communicating, that you guys are like, well, what do you think? What is your opinion? And describe, like, okay, like these are the pros and cons of this situation, these are the pros and cons of this situation. Not just, oh, well, I don't like your decision, we're gonna go with mine. Like, no, that's not the way it works. Because in the in the long run, maybe the decision that that the other individual makes might affect the whole dynamic of the family. So, I mean, it is a very, very big challenge because it's like I said, it's two completely separate people in their marriage. The male thinks one thing, the female thinks another thing, and it's you know, it's very rare for us to be together because we think so completely different. But trusting each other and trusting in the Lord that the Lord is gonna give us the right path is the best thing that we can do.

SPEAKER_05 39:19

Okay, I I love you, babe, but I'm gonna put you on the spot.

SPEAKER_03 39:23

Can I say something before that? Yes, yes. Uh, just a quick follow-up on that, Miguel. At the end of the day, when you guys have the discussion and you guys do come to an agreement, whether it be the decision or the the point that you wanted to make or she wanted to make, like at the end of the day, like whichever side you choose. Do you guys follow the decision at the end of the day? Like, do you guys like stick with that? Like, okay, this is what we're gonna do, and we're gonna follow it, or does it somebody like eventually go back to like, oh no, I just didn't like well in the beginning, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:56

I mean this is what happened in Michael and Maritza verse one chapter two.

SPEAKER_02 40:02

I mean, the idea is to try to follow it to the best of our abilities, but you know, certain situations, circ circumstances happen that sometimes it doesn't help anymore. So then you have to go, you have to go back and rethink. It's like, okay, obviously this wasn't working, then let's try this. Let's let's try your opinion to see maybe your opinion helped, or if you chose her opinion and her opinion didn't work, then you know what? Let's try my opinion because maybe that'll help. But the the the biggest thing here, and and I hate to say this, is don't flunt. Well, I told you my my idea was better in both aspects. We don't want to hear that. No part of the rel of of the couple wants to hear, well, I told you my idea was better than yours. You know, no, because you're diminim, you're diminishing their position as a leader in the family, you know, and but all of that was like learned through your relationship.

SPEAKER_01 41:10

Like when you guys were like a baby couple, you know, that was a hard thing for you guys to get over.

SPEAKER_02 41:14

Yeah, but as I mean, so for anybody, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:17

And so as time went on, you know, they were able to, like I said, you know, what is their goal? Yeah, you know, and so they're you know focused on that goal together rather than individuals.

SPEAKER_03 41:34

Yeah, because uh in any in any marriage, the honeymoon phase is all flowers and rainbows and stuff like that. And at the beginning, you know, maybe the first will be a few months or the few years, you know, it's always gonna be dandy, or even before you they don't have kids. After kids come, the situation and the relationship changes overall. So we gotta keep that in mind with with with uh marriage, you know, that uh it's uh it's a moving, it's like moving gears, you know, moving process that every every marriage goes through several phases and you know it come they come as as different parts of life. And uh, you know, just uh keep that in mind with everything, like you know, that like like they like Miguel said that uh that you know the the whole dynamic, how it turns out, and you know, it it's difficult at the beginning, and it's gonna be even more difficult as time goes on because the situation changes overall.

SPEAKER_02 42:23

And all situations are handled differently with different relationships, you know, because our relationship is not gonna be the same as your guys' relationship because we're totally different people, you know, but that doesn't mean that it's impossible, you know, and that's the biggest thing that we need to like, like I said, that's the biggest importance that just because oh well the decision you made was wrong, now we're gonna go with mine. Yeah, maybe that that's the idea, but don't bring it out that way because you're you're you're making the other individual feel down, and the idea is you're supposed to lift each other up. I I heard something very, very nice that that that brought my attention was like, oh, you know, in a couple you fall, the other ones are to pick you up. So you guys are working together.

SPEAKER_01 43:15

Yeah, we laugh first and then pick you up, yeah, for sure. I'm not one. I always laugh first.

SPEAKER_05 43:23

Yeah, um, and that's that's a question because we were having this conversation before this. Uh between because of us, the whole roles, it's I feel like it's a little hard because he's not here all the time. So I was explaining to Ann and to Vanessa, well, he was here, right? That the way I feel is if he tells, and that's what that's what I'm saying. I don't want to say like I told you so, or like I don't want to be mean or like put you on the spot in any way, but the way that you thought about a man's role is. Is you being the king and being up here and your role and me just follow. That is it was your mentality. And now that you are hearing us, you changed a little bit and saying that we need to be united. When I told you that that's what it is being together, being equal and being united in this relationship, in this marriage. I told you that before. I I wasn't making you feel like I'm gonna take I'm gonna be the woman in the pants, lose. I'll respect it, but if you show me respect, and there was a time period, and they know they're my witness that I came to them and I said I didn't feel that I was respected because you made me feel little when it came to that. But I'm glad that you're changing because you're hearing other people, and that's why I like to talk to them or to whoever, because we need to see our um outside opinions of our own mind.

SPEAKER_02 45:06

Brother, I'm with you on this one. Trust me, it happens, it happens. Marita would tell me things and I wouldn't believe it until someone else told me it's like, oh, oh, okay. And it's it's human nature, dude. It's human nature. It's the same thing with our parents. What parents can see? Listen, I've already gone through this. Do this, do this, and we're I I've almost the testarudos. No, well, I'm gonna do it on my own because I think I know everything. And then we learn, it's like, oh, my mom was right. Same thing. Oh, my spouse was right. I messed up, I did this wrong. You know, the biggest thing is to to admit that you know what, I was wrong. I apologize. Let's move on together. Not that, oh, well, I'm I'm sorry for messing up, and that's it. It's like, no, like be 100% honest about it. And admitting that you're wrong, guys, is not going to make you less of a man.

SPEAKER_00 46:05

Right.

SPEAKER_02 46:05

In a woman's eyes, that'll make you more of a man because you admitted that you were wrong and you needed help.

SPEAKER_01 46:12

And like I said, like, you know, being part of a marriage, you know, it's just it's being part of your team, you know. That's the team that you're creating with your partner, you know, with your partner and your kids, you know. That's that's your team, you know. And so, and like I said, you know, what what's your mission?

SPEAKER_00 46:29

And and in the beginning, when we were speaking about it, when Jose was speaking his part, I completely saw what he was what he was trying to say. And I it goes back to me telling him, like, you have a good foundation, a good understanding. It was just the way he was saying it. And I think it was just like certain words that came across that Jasmine doesn't like. And I think because my brother can be like that too, my brother. I think all guys are like that. Because sometimes like my brother would come and tell me, no, but that's it's because she did this and she did that. And I was like, I completely understand him, but I think it's just the way he speaks to her or what he says to her, like certain words. I'm like, that's where it's like you guys need to like be a little bit more.

SPEAKER_05 47:16

I think besides that, I'm the kind of person that takes a lot of things personal, because I don't know, I thought you spoke very well right now.

SPEAKER_01 47:23

Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:25

I think we should do that. I love the way you you've spoken today, and I really love the way you've um really put yourself out there. And thank you for for being honest, for being yourself, and for for doing this, you know, because not a lot of men would do this, to be honest. And I think this it also shows us that you and Jasmine have a really good foundation and you guys have a really good start in the in the next chapter that you guys have and just keep it going. Like I'm very proud of you guys, I'm very happy for you guys.

SPEAKER_02 48:04

And I mean, I can see a and know that you guys can always count on us. Yes.

SPEAKER_05 48:08

I know I wish I could get you guys to be our madrinas too, but I can't. Yeah, we have a lot of it's okay. We're we're not hurt at all.

SPEAKER_03 48:18

Just as long as we get better.

SPEAKER_05 48:20

You guys are getting some tack up.

SPEAKER_03 48:22

Vanessa, I've been uh you're not the first one to tell me that. Uh I've been told in my jobs and in my personal life that my mouth is my biggest enemy. And I understand why. I do know I am self-aware of that. That I my way of speaking sometimes hurts feelings and you know is a little bit too blunt and too upfront. And that's just the way I don't know. I apologize to everybody or anybody who I offended or you know, said something that didn't like. And and I'm not just gonna say it's a woman thing where like, you know, people you know take what I say a little bit too personal or a little bit like I'm attacking them. When I'm not, I'm just being honest. And a lot of people are not used to that.

SPEAKER_05 49:00

I'm very sensitive, so you need to watch how you say things too.

SPEAKER_01 49:04

That's how people see me too, though. Yeah, it's hard for us out there.

SPEAKER_00 49:07

Yes, it is. I I was really blunt, but now I'm kind of like in the middle. So I guess sometimes it's like siempre me dice bonita. And sometimes I'm like, okay, I'll just follow that.

SPEAKER_02 49:19

I used to be backwards. Yeah, I used to not be confrontational at all, and now I'm backwards. Now I I speak my mind.

SPEAKER_01 49:28

I rubbed off on him. I have I have uh like another verse that I want to share with you all, and more like a almost like a whole chapter, but it describes like the the role of a wife, and then it describes the the role of uh of a husband or or a just a man in general. But it's uh it's Proverbs 31, verses 10 through 31. I'm gonna try not to read the whole thing, even though the whole thing is really good. But it says the wife of a noble character who can find she is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She collects wool and flax and works with eager hands. And it just goes on to say, like all the things that the wife does for him. Um, and then when we go to the bottom, it says What verse? Um 31. It says, and it said this is for the husband. It says, Honor her for all her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at a city gate. So husbands are supposed to recognize all. I'm not gonna read the whole thing, but I I really encourage everybody to read it. Again, it's Proverbs 31, 10 through 31. And it says everything that a wife, of course, in this time would do. But it says, you know, husbands, encourage her, be proud of her, you know, because that's what that's what we're supposed to do. That's what husbands are supposed to do to wives, and the same as wives are supposed to do to husbands. I'm gonna look up the one for the husbands really quick.

SPEAKER_05 51:14

Well, you're looking at that. Let me ask you on that, on the roles. When it comes to career-wise, what is the correct role of a woman and a man when it comes to careers? What do you feel, Miguel?

SPEAKER_02 51:26

I think, and I'll speak from my own opinion, from my own experience, I don't think it matters. I think um if you are a very secure individual, it doesn't matter. Uh, I will be honest, my wife is actually more educated than I am. And I see that and I and and I honor her for that because of the sacrifice that she does as a woman, um, her being the head of the of the household of do feeding, uh cleaning, all of the all of that, and still has time to go to school and be educated. And I'm very proud of that.

SPEAKER_05 52:04

Is it a difference when it has when they have kids?

SPEAKER_02 52:08

Uh not really. I I mean it goes back to the same thing. Um you guys are there to balance each other out. You know, just because he's going to work doesn't mean that you're not gonna take care of the household. Or if you're going to school, that he's not gonna take care of the household. It the door swings both ways, you know. It's a it's a constant balance between both couples that are trying to work make something work that is not easy. Um, but you the focus is that you're you're lifting each other up. So if that helps the the the family dynamic, I'm gonna say it financially, then why not?

SPEAKER_05 52:50

How do you feel?

SPEAKER_00 52:53

Be yourself, it's okay for no then please.

SPEAKER_03 53:01

So I don't mind having an educated woman by my side because my wife, like Miguel, she's a lot more educated than I am. I wasn't uh I am more of a working man and you know, and she's more of a likes school, likes you know, wants to have a career and stuff like that. That's not the path I chose, but I still have a good career regardless. And I I do encourage her too if that's what she wants to do. But my biggest thing is that we do have a whole family and not to neglect our family over a career or work, because that's a lot of the problems that I see in today's world, that a lot of women choose career and work over family, and that just destroys the whole family dynamic, and that's very important because if they're gonna choose that, they should have never thought of having a family in the first place. That is that the path they chose to have a career, and that should have been their first priority. Because if you already have a family and you want to do a career, then you know you have to either pick one or the other. It's hard to do both, it is very hard because you are devoting yourself to two things and you can't split yourself into. And I just, you know, I wish and I hope that anybody who hears this and it's and women, you know, like you know, know what the goal is at the end of the day of what you want to do. Because it's hard to do both and and don't blame yourself because you can't do one or the other. Pick a path and follow it through. But just know that there's consequences to picking either or the other and choose the good and the bad. Uh always uh see the pros and the cons of which one that you want. And you know, with you in we live in a in a very open world today that you can do both if you choose to. So you just choose your path and follow it through. But it is very hard once you have children that you know of you having a priority of something over the other.

SPEAKER_02 54:55

I think it's very important to make sure that there's open communication in the relationship because I mean saying, Oh well, I'm gonna go to school, uh be like, okay, yeah, but you know, it's still hand in hand. We both have a role to play in this family. It's not that just because I'm working, you're the housewife. It's like, no, it's still, you know, nowadays m most of most couples, most families, both the couples are working. So they have to divide that role of family, of, of, of the roles. You know, it's not that aunt is like, oh no, plus the husband goes work and the wife takes care of the kids and cleaning and feeding and all of this, which a lot of people back then, I'll state and still now, don't see that as an actual job. Being a full-time mom is a job. Yeah. And sometimes it's even harder than a regular job. But the biggest thing is, like I said, make sure that there's always a balance and there's always open communication. Because if there's no communication, that relationship is going to fail.

SPEAKER_05 55:59

When I told him and when I when I told him that I wanted to go back to school, I came, I I told him with a plan. I didn't say, oh, I'm just gonna go to school. No. I told him, by the time that I do get in the program, Sienna's already gonna be in school. I'll be in school while she's in school. So I'm not neglecting her. I'm not like just putting her in daycare or with my sister or whoever, right? I was like, we're both gonna be in school. By the time I get out, the kids are gonna be out. Then I could come home and be with them. All I did ask him is like, let's see if you're able to take care of the financial part for those two years so I could finish the school. But I came with the plan. I came to the table with a plan. Now no comedy say, oh, take care of it, I'm gonna go to school. So that was my communication with him. Okay, now he does feel some type of way. I know that I have his support, but it's like, okay, I'm gonna support her, but he still thinks that I'm just not gonna be there for the kids.

SPEAKER_00 56:56

I think this is an amazing subject. And let me tell you why. Okay, this is my point of view. When I met my husband and I got pregnant with Christian, I was in my career and I was trying to move up, and the doors just kept getting closed, kept getting closed, and I stayed in the position that I was, and I had the opportunity to work from home. Me and my husband sat down, we agreed I was gonna work from home, take care of the kids from home, because Asul was just born as well, a year later, and um she was a pre-mi, so she was having a lot of health issues. I've always wanted to have a family and be a stay-at-home mom. Um, but financially I couldn't do that. So that was the best way for me to be a mom and still work and bring money home. So I had agreed. Now, from the time that Asul was born to the time that my husband died, it was 10 years. So 10 years, I stayed in that position. I was home for my kids and I loved it. But then when he was gone, I felt so lost and I felt like I gave up my career for my kids. And at one point, I was angry at myself because I felt I lost myself in that sense. Now that I have the opportunity and I've moved up and I'm my career is coming back to me and doors are opening, I see it now. Now that I'm following and I'm listening to my God, I see that in the beginning, these doors, I was applying like crazy to be assistant supervisor, to be supervisor, and I was being rejected. And I was one of the top workers and I still wasn't getting that position. But why? Because it wasn't for me at that time. It just wasn't for me. For me was to be at home with my kids and bringing in some type of income, right? If I would have been praying at that time and in in the in the book, I would have known, like, okay, it just wasn't my time. But I wasn't. So now that I do see that, that it's like, okay, now I have I've raised my kids. My kids are old enough to do what they need to do. Now it's my time. Now I can move on. So this is where you need to put God in the middle of your relationship, and you need to be, is this for me at this time? Is this for me to do school, be with my family, and still be a wife to my husband? And is my husband okay with this? And this is where your guys' communication comes through and be like, okay, obviously, you guys already made the decision, but uh for future purposes, this is where you start praying about things before taking action on things, and that is something I've learned, and I think it's so beautiful. And I just it just clicked to me today because I was like, man, I'm happy where I'm at. And I like now I see why I never got the positions that I wanted, why I never was able to move up because I'm very career oriented, but for some reason it just wasn't happening, and my husband was all for it, you know, but it just at that time it wasn't, and I see it like my kids love having me home, they really do. So I think it's just something that we all like not just as women, but as men too, like we really need to pray and talk to our partners so we can make the best lives for ourselves and our children.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:24

And see, like in my case, like I didn't choose to be a single mom. You know, when I first had Caleb, you know, Caleb's dad was only with us of his first what three, four months of his life. And then I was by myself, you know. And so I had to work, there was no choice, you know. If it were up to me, I would have stayed at home with my son until he was able to go to school. And so that didn't happen. But, you know, I've been very, very blessed. Um, you know, my my boss is an amazing boss and allows me to be a mom to my son when I have to be. My number one goal is to be his mom. That is to me, is the number one priority in my life. If I fail at that job, then nothing else that I've done matters. But I have been very blessed in that the career path that I've chosen, that I'm I'm good at it. I make pretty good money. I've been able to start my own business. I've been able to provide for my son by myself. You know, I have to be his mom and his dad at the same time. And I do prioritize time with my son. I do cancel things to be with my son. My son comes first all the time, you know. Um, and I know that a lot of women can't do that or choose not to do that. You know, it it's the same, um, it's a double-edged sword for some people. But I feel successful in the sense that my son is happy. He has a wonderful life that I have provided for him. I wish he has the mom that I wish that I had, you know. So that's also been my goal is to be a better mom. Um, he has everything, thank the Lord, that he could want. And I've been able to provide that for him by myself, but not completely by myself because it's taken a village to help raise my son. You know, I I've had Miguel Amaritza there for me. I've had so many, so many people that have have helped me be successful at being his mom. But that is my main job is to be his mom.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:45

And I think it goes back to the way you want to have your relationship and how you want to have your careers. Like my sister, she got pregnant really early. She's 19. She's um she's going to school. Her mentality and her her um fiance now mentality is right now that the baby's little, they want to put themselves through school, finish everything. So by the time he is walking and talking and remembering things, which is like what, four, five, six years old, like they're already in their careers, they're not struggling anymore. So they're okay with not being there in the beginning, but being there towards where he's remembering, you know? So it all depends on the dynamic of your of your guys' relationship and how you guys want it from there on.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:32

So yeah, it's just just different choices of how they want it.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:35

Yeah, because of my situation, uh, I always wanted to further my career in the medical field. But unfortunately, I got in trouble with the the law and I couldn't do anything for 10, 15 years because of that. So that's why I did not pursue it back then. But regardless, with with when I was with Giselle, yes, I did work, but my mom, great grandmother, like very, very great. Um not to be bragging or anything, but that's just in my eyes, right? Um, but I had her support when I was working, because I did work and go to school when for Giselle. That's when I started in the medical field. And then Junior and Imani came, and I was high-risk pregnancy, so I was with them. So with them, no, I didn't lose anything. Con Sienna, thank you to my boss and everything that told me stay home. I've been working since then at home. So I've been with Sienna. But at this time in my life, I said, it's not that I don't want to be a mom no more, and they're not gonna be my priority, but I feel like I need to do more. Why? Because I feel like being in the medical field helping people, that's my calling. And I I can't let it go. And I keep on praying and praying and praying. Um if it's not for me, put more things in my path on that career. And honestly, right now it's just it's wide open. It's just up to me if I could make it into the program. But I prayed. If it's not for me, even with him, when I started dating Jose and I have broken up with him and that night, I said, God, if he's not for me, let me know because I will put any kind of relationship and I will break out because I was still like in love with Giselle's dad, and I will mess up those relationships. And I said, God, if he's not for me, please let me know. That same night that I broke up with him, I went to his house. And ever since then, I haven't been able to let him go. So, in some way, somehow, in some ways, somehow, God has always been there with me, but not like I like now that I feel him. Before it was just help me when I need help, and now I feel like. When I need help, when I want to say thank you, when I just want to talk to him, like now lo siento más. I actually feel him.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:09

Because before you before you had a transactional relationship with God.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:14

You know, it was a what can you do for me?

SPEAKER_05 1:06:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:16

You know, and it's not a good idea.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:17

And I was not returning nothing to him. Yeah, there's a lot of people. But now it's it's different. And I just hope that we continue to be putting God in our relationship that we both are going to be changing our mentality because we're we're strong. We're so hard-headed, losos.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:44

So the the verses that I was talking about now that um it's you know men for men to take charge of their home. This this um that they use the word deacons, but you know, we can say like just men in general. But it says, Whoever is spot, oh I'm sorry, this is uh 1 Timothy chapter 3 verses 1 through 12. Um it says, now the overseer is above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not to not give in to drunkenness, not violent, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a worthy manner, full of respect. If any one does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church? He must not be a recent convert or may not have conceded and fall under the same judgment as the devil. Let me see, and he must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into devil's trap. And then we skip to verse eleven. In the same way the women are to be worthy of respect, not malicious talkers, but temperate and trustworthy in everything. A deacon must be faithful to his wife and must manage his children and his household well.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:06

There goes La Toxica.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:10

But I mean, uh for everything, we know it's like we always say we we always say, like, oh, God, give us the answers. Please give me the answer. The answer is right here. It's in the Bible.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:19

It's in the book.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:20

It's in the Bible, you know? And so it it it it it all comes down to the same thing: husbands have respect for your wives, and wives have respect for your husbands and love each other the way God is telling us to love each other.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:35

Yes, exactly. In conclusion, you guys, before we we end this, Jose, would you is there anything that you would like to add or say before we leave? No.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:47

I think all good for this. Very good.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:49

Hold on, I didn't say my verse, so let me go ahead and get my verse first.

unknown 1:08:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:52

I think this is uh going to end.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:55

To end.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:56

So minus the Colinthians uh uh three, uh chapter three, verse twenty-eight, it says, There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. That's right.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:15

Amen.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:16

Amen.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:18

Is there anything that you would like to say or end with?

SPEAKER_02 1:09:22

Uh relationships have a lot of patience, please, because the devil's always gonna try to intercede and just have Christ in your hearts.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:31

And that's why I chose that's why we chose Marisa and Miguel to be our spiritual uh padrinos.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:39

In conclusion, guys, as you can see, no matter what we we bring up from the Bible, it's always man and woman need to respect each other. And just as a woman should treat a man, a man should treat a woman. So just keep that in mind. Um, we are gonna end off with this um verse, Mark 10, 9. What therefore God has joined together, let man, let not man separate. So um thank you again, you guys, for joining us. And I hope this helped you guys a little bit. I hope it didn't ruffle any feathers tonight. Um, can and can you um end us off with a prayer? Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:23

Heavenly Father, thank you once again for bringing us together and for adding Jose and Miguel to this conversation. Conversations that need to be had sometimes. Um, but I I just want to fervently pray with um with and for Jasmine and Jose and their upcoming upshuls. I pray for Miguel and Maritza for continued blessings in their marriage. I pray for Vanessa that she might find somebody that can, you know, walk with her in this Christ journey that she's on. And, you know, marriage is such a wonderful thing. And, you know, when it's blessed by our Father, it's it's just wonderful. And I pray that anybody out there that is struggling in their marriage and their relationship, that you know, you you turn it to God, you turn all your troubles to God because in Him we find peace and understanding and the greatest love that we can ever feel. So thank you, Heavenly Father, for giving us the blessings that you do every day. Lead us and guide us so that we can have your love shine through us. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:24

All righty. All right, click like and subscribe. And thank you for hanging out again with us again, you guys. So until next time. Thank you. Thank you.