The Resilience Project
Illuminating the unseen impacts of adoption — for all who’ve been touched by it.
The Resilience Project Podcast brings voice, visibility, and validation to the parts of adoption society rarely names - but all of us feel. Through a trauma-informed somatic lens, host Julie Brumley explores the lived experiences of the entire adoption constellation, with a tender emphasis on the adoptee experience.
This podcast goes beyond storytelling into soul-telling. It offers embodied insight, compassionate education, and a path toward awareness, strength, and hope. Each episode invites listeners to understand adoption more deeply - not just with the mind, but with the nervous system - and to reconnect with the truth, identity, and belonging that were always yours to come home to.
The Resilience Project
Loss - The First Landscape Adoptees Walk Through
Summary:
This episode of the Resilience Project delves into the complex topic of loss, particularly from the perspective of adoptees. Julie Brumley explores three distinct types of loss: ambiguous, vicarious, and secondary, and discusses how these losses are deeply embedded in the lives of adoptees from birth. The episode aims to increase awareness and understanding of these unique experiences, offering insights from experts like Gabor Mate and personal reflections from Julie's own life.
Keywords:
loss, adoptees, ambiguous loss, vicarious loss, secondary loss, Gabor Mate, trauma, adoption, identity, healing
Takeaways:
- Loss is a foundational experience for adoptees, woven into their lives from birth.
- Ambiguous loss involves losing an entire family, culture, and identity without closure.
- Vicarious loss is a traumatic experience embedded in senses, reactivated in distress.
- Secondary loss stems from core losses, reactivating original traumatic memories.
- Adoptees often experience multiple losses before they can even process them.
- Healing requires acknowledging and validating these losses within oneself.
- Creating a safe mental space is crucial for adoptees to cope with loss.
- Society often fails to recognize the depth of loss experienced by adoptees.
- Adoption is created from loss, a hard truth that needs validation.
- Understanding and confronting these losses is essential for healing.
Sound Bites:
- Loss is fact of the adoptee life.
- Adoption is created from loss.
- Ambiguous loss lacks closure.
- Vicarious loss is sensory.
- Secondary loss reactivates trauma.
- Healing needs validation.
- Loss shapes adoptee identity.
- Create a safe mental space.
- Society overlooks adoptee loss.
- Confronting loss is essential.
Chapters:
- 00:00:00 Introduction to Loss
- 00:03:00 Ambiguous Loss Explained
- 00:09:00 Vicarious Loss and Its Impact
- 00:15:00 Understanding Secondary Loss
- 00:21:00 Healing and Acknowledgment
Instagram: @juliebrumley_
Facebook: julierasbrum
TikTok: @juliebrumley_
Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group
You Tube: @julie_brumley