It's Never Too Late to Write Your Story: The Courage to Become Visible After 50

Have you ever told yourself:

"I'm too old to start."

"I should have done this years ago."

"Someone else is already doing it better."

If so, this episode is for you.

As I approach my 58th birthday, I'm reflecting on the decade that changed me most. In my 50s, I published my first book, survived ovarian and uterine cancer, left a career that no longer fulfilled me, and stepped into a new identity as a memoir teacher and coach.

None of those things happened because I finally felt ready.

They happened because I stopped waiting for permission.

In this episode of Making Memoir Magic, I'm sharing the personal experiences that taught me our stories do not expire with age. In fact, some of our most meaningful chapters are often waiting to be written.

You'll learn:

• Why waiting for confidence often keeps us stuck
• How life experiences become the foundation of powerful memoirs
• Why it's never too late to call yourself a writer
• The surprising truth about becoming visible later in life

Whether you're 45, 65, or 85, your voice matters.

Your stories matter.

And the time to begin is now.

Journal Prompt:
What story, dream, or part of yourself have you been hiding because you think it's too late?

Write about the moment you first started believing that.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Making Memoir Magic. To learn more about my course, Make Memoir Magic, click here. 

Join my free Facebook Group, Memoir Magic for Aspiring Authors, where we honor your story, provide tips, create community, and help you write the story you were meant to tell. Join here!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Making Memoir Magic, the podcast where we unlock the power of your story and guide you through the magical process of turning life experiences into memoirs that inspire and impact. I'm your host, Carrie Chrysman, a memoir mentor and storytelling champion. And I'm here to help you find the courage to embrace your unique story and share it with the world. Whether you're just starting out or refining your final draft, this is the place to be for practical tips, inspiration, and the encouragement you need to write the memoir only you can tell. Ready to make some magic? Let's dive in. Welcome to Making Memoir Magic. I'm Carrie Kreissman, memoir coach, author of the memoir Accidental First Lady, and someone who believes that ordinary lives are filled with extraordinary stories worth preserving. Today I want to talk about something that has been on my heart as I approach my 58th birthday in July. It is the courage that it takes to become visible after the age of 50. But besides that, I also want to talk about a question that I hear from aspiring memoir writers over and over again. And that question is, is it too late for me? Is it too late to start writing? Too late to publish? Too late to call myself a writer? Too late to reinvent myself? Too late to begin again? And my answer is always the same. No. In fact, for many people, the most meaningful chapters of their lives haven't even been written yet. A few weeks ago, I was standing in the grocery store checkout line with a bottle of wine on the conveyor belt when the cashier asked me for my birthday. Now she had to do this as a course of her job because clearly I look over 21. All right. So she asked, and then she, when she did so, she looked at me and was laughing. She says, I know you're at least 21, and then some. And she probably thought I might be offended, but I smiled and I laughed as well, like I am right now a little bit, because truthfully, I don't care. But because as I approach my 58th birthday, I feel grateful for every single year of life that I have. However, I didn't always feel that way. For many years, I think I was like a lot of women. I looked at age as something to hide from or soften or apologize for, but now I see it as proof that I'm still here, I'm still living, I'm still doing new things. And after everything that my body has been through, uh surviving two cancers, um, that is not something that I take lightly. So just for a little context and perspective, I was 51 when I published my first book, Accidental First Lady. That book was born from three and a half years of asking myself difficult questions, revisiting old memories, and finding the courage to put my life on the page. But around that same period of my life, that's when I was diagnosed with uterine cancer. Actually, it was really about a year and a half after I started writing my book. And I was writing while I was working, like many authors do. Most authors do not write their books as a full-time job. But with that said, I wasn't too far into my book, and then boom, bam, whatever. I was told I had cancer. Nothing prepares you for hearing that. Nothing. And I'm not saying that to be dramatic. I say it because it is true. No matter your stage, no matter your prognosis, the moment you hear those words, you understand something very clearly. The time is not promised. So I remember after my first chemotherapy treatment, I was determined to prove to everyone that I was just fine. I still walked three miles a day. Um, I would tell people chemo isn't so bad. However, it is cumulative, so it's going to catch up with you at some point. But shortly after that first chemotherapy treatment, I went in for a PET scan as um before my next phase of treatment, which was going to be radiation. And my doctor called back to say there was a spot that they found on my chest. It's lit. It lit up. Things like that is what he said. And my world stopped again. I couldn't believe it. Um, but after a bronchoscopy, um, it was revealed that it was not cancer, thankfully, um, something far less frightening. It was the allergies flaring up that I had lived with for decades. So thankfully, not a big deal. But the fear of that moment stayed with me. And it taught me something that I carry with me now, that truly, truly, truly, I can't impart this enough to you, the time to live is now. If you had told 45-year-old me what my 50s would look like, I don't think I would have believed you. I would publish my first book. I would survive cancer. I would leave a job that no longer fulfilled me. I would build a business around helping other people tell their stories. I would stand in front of classrooms and introduce myself as a memoir instructor. And that took me a little while to accept those titles, author, teacher, coach. For years, I believed those titles belonged to someone else, someone who had more credentials than I did, someone who maybe had a bigger following on social media or just in the world than I did, someone who'd been doing it longer. Maybe you felt that way too. Maybe you have a dream that keeps whispering to you, but you keep telling yourself someone else has already done it better. Oh, I should have started years ago. I missed my chance. Okay? Not true. I want to speak directly to that person listening who has always wanted to write their memoir. Maybe you've been carrying around a story for decades. Maybe you've told yourself you'll start after retirement, after the kids are grown, when you have more time. I'm gonna tell you, there's never more time. There is time right now, but you're never gonna have more time in the day because you'll always find it to fill, find a way to fill it with something else. So um just keep that in mind. Maybe you say you'll do it when you feel more confident, but when's that going to happen? We are never truly as confident as we think we need to be. And I'm here to tell you: the more you write and the more you put yourself out there, that is what builds your confidence. That feeling of seeing your work executed in the world, on the page, okay, out of your mouth, that is what builds the confidence that you need to not only write, but finish and publish your memoir. So here's what I've learned both as a writer and as someone who has sat beside many aspiring authors. Confidence is not the prerequisite, it is the result. All right. Let's say that again. Confidence is not the prerequisite, it is the result. And what that means, it's how your life will change when you decide to believe in the value of your story and commit to telling it through your memoir. The first page is never written by the author who feels completely ready. It's written by someone who decides that they are no longer willing to wait. Okay, and we all have that moment, and there's a different catalyst that might precede the moment that you actually decide that you're going to do this. But I want you to be open and recognize it, okay, and listen to that call. Heed the call to write your memoir. And if it's coming from me and you're listening right now, and this is what you needed to hear, then I'm happy for you. And I want you to start writing. I have worked with people of all ages. I mean, maybe not super young because they have not had that lived experience. But I was recently presenting to a group at a writer's retreat, and there were 20 somethings to 80 somethings in that room. And, you know, some of the people who are in their 70s and 80s that I work with, they're writing the stories that they thought they would never tell. And it is such a privilege to see the joy return to their faces because they have finally given themselves the permission to write. And they're not doing this because they want to become famous or sell a million copies of books, but it's because they want to leave a piece of themselves behind for someone else. Um, you know, and there's multiple reasons. We all come to authorship with certain goals and certain reasons why we are writing. And it's multifaceted, it's not necessarily one thing or another. But when we talk about becoming visible, we often think it means being known by everyone or a big audience or a best-selling book or thousands of followers. But I've learned something different that's actually, I think, dare I say, more important. Visibility begins much smaller. It begins the moment that you stop hiding. The moment that you say, I am a writer, my experiences matter, my voice belongs in the conversation. My life is worthy of reflection. That is where memoir begins. It doesn't begin with a publishing contract, okay? Although that is such a milestone to reach, that's not where it begins. It doesn't begin with a perfect outline because those don't exist. And not everyone wants to outline. Outlines are important, but so is structure and organization. And if you find it in a different way than an outline, that's okay too. It doesn't begin with certainty, it begins with courage. All right. It begins with courage. And as I enter these final couple years of my 50s, I don't see myself as someone whose most exciting years are behind her. I see myself as someone who's constantly becoming. I'm still learning, I'm still creating and still taking risks. And that is what I hope for every person listening today. Whether your dream is to write a memoir, start a business, learn a new skill, rekindle an old passion, or simply just show up more fully in your own life. Please don't wait for the day that you feel ready. Because that day may never come. Start while your hands still shake, or when you have doubts. Okay? That's the best way to get over doubts and imposter syndrome. Start while you wonder whether anyone will care. Because the truth is, every meaningful thing that I've done in my life required me to begin before I had complete confidence. And if you have a memoir inside of you, let me leave you with this question. What story are you keeping hidden because you're waiting for permission to tell it? Perhaps this is the moment you finally give yourself permission. If this episode resonated with you, I would love to hear from you. If you know someone who's also writing their book, please share this episode with them. Hit follow, give me a review. I would love your feedback. I would love to know what this podcast episode meant to you. Send me a message and tell me about the one thing that you're ready to become visible about. And if the story that you're ready to share is your own life story, my memoir coaching programs, workshops, and resources are always available to help you begin. Because your story does not expire, and it's never too late to write the next chapter. So keep believing in yourself, keep believing in the value of your story, and always believe that you are the best person to tell your story. And I'm cheering you on. So keep making memoir magic. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Making Memoir Magic. I hope today's conversation inspired you to take the next step toward telling your unique story through memoir. Remember, your story matters and someone out there is waiting to read it. If you enjoyed today's episode, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review. It helps others find the show. You can also connect with me on my website at caryCreisman.com, on Instagram at Carrie. And each Wednesday, I host a memoir magic writing where you get to join other writers to accomplish the often arduous task of getting words on the page. Until next time, keep writing, keep sharing, and keep making memoir magic.