The Carpool Guys

Nap Time Anyone? We Can't Stop Laughing About How Tired We Are...All The Time!

• Jon Ackerman

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Why Are We Always So Tired? The Exhausted Jewish Life Edition

Somebody had to say it. We are exhausted. All the time. Every single day. And not in a "ran a marathon" kind of way... in a "stared at a dinner menu for four minutes and still couldn't decide" kind of way.

Fresh off their most successful episode ever featuring Allison Blass, Jon, Asher, and Dave are back together- and Asher is fresh off a trip to Israel for nephew Meir Simcha's bar mitzvah. But jet lag quickly gives way to a much bigger conversation: why does it feel like everyone around us is running on empty?

The guys dig into the real reasons modern exhaustion hits differently — the constant connectivity, the WhatsApp messages that start before 7am, the total disappearance of boredom, the dual curriculum school day, the shul commitments, the community obligations, and the creeping anxiety of a world that never really turns off. Plus Dave's infamous half-a-block bike ride that ended with him passed out in a Brooklyn garbage room. And the debut of a brand new segment: the guys go around the room and share what is on their minds this week, from aliens and AI to the Hanta virus and the eternal question of which is scarier: Independence Day or Terminator.

Also: snoring during bar mitzvah speeches, AIM away messages, The Brick app (purchased, never used), Trump's Shabbos proclamation, Dave's "David Days," essential worker pride, and the most important question in Jewish history — which Parsha would you most want to live through?

Question of the Week from Anonymous in Commack: If you could live through any Parsha, which would it be?

We want to hear from you — are you exhausted? What is draining you most right now, and how do you combat it? Email us at carpoolguyspod@gmail.com or drop a comment on YouTube.

🎙️ Rate and review The Carpool Guys on Apple Podcasts — five stars only, please. Four and a half if you must.

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⏱️ Chapters with Timestamps

0:00 — Cold Open: Snoring at a Bar Mitzvah. Avi Was Not Happy.

0:27 — Welcome Back + Shoutout to Allison Blass

2:00 — Welcome to New Listeners + Now on Amazon Podcasts and Podbean

3:47 — New Segment Debut: Around the Room — Naming Rights Contest Announced

17:10 — Today's Topic: Why Are We Always So Tired?

20:26 — The Phone Problem: There Is No Off Button Anymore

23:48 — Is the Jewish Lifestyle More Exhausting Than Everyone Else's?

26:31 — The Anxiety Tax: Always Waiting for the Next Shoe to Drop

27:47 — No Escape From Work: WhatsApp Does Not Have an Away Message

31:22 — Dave Falls Asleep During Bar Mitzvah Speeches — Full Story

33:37 — Asher Falls Asleep on Someone's Couch — Also a Full Story

43:11 — Dave Days: Twice a Year, No Explanation Needed

43:41 — Question of the Week: Which Parsha Would You Want to Live Through?

51:38 — Closing: Comment on YouTube, Email Us Your Exhaustion Stories

Please rate and review The Carpool Guys!

You can email us at carpoolguyspod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram @carpoolguyspod

Send us a question, a comment, birthday wish, shoutout, or anything else fun and positive, and maybe we'll feature your addition on the next episode of The Carpool Guys Podcast!

SPEAKER_04

During the speeches, I got like such an elbow from Avi. Oh my god. I was snoring so loud. I was like fighting myself. I'm like, stay up, stay up. And then I had one of those loud hiccups.

SPEAKER_02

You know, like the Hello and welcome to the Carpool Guys podcast, where three dads just trying their best to talk about life, work, family, and all the detours in between. We've made mistakes, lots of mistakes, but we've also learned a few things along the way. We don't have it all figured out, but that's never stopped us from sharing our two cents anyway. The Carpool Guys podcast is hosted by Usher Dwaretsky, John Ackerman, and Dave from Flatbush Tenenbaum. Buckle up, it's carpool time. Okay, welcome back, everybody. We are hot on the heels of uh really our most successful episode where we interviewed Allison Blast. So shouts to Allison Blast. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_03

She was so incredible, and I hope that everybody who listened felt uh inspired as we did. It was really incredible. I don't know. Dave, what did how'd you walk out of that one?

SPEAKER_04

I was blown away by by what Allison said, and we didn't have to make Aliyah to hit those high numbers. So it was really double impressive.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, fair enough. It was it really was our most successful episode. I think many people listened to for curiosity, but at the same time gained so much from her story, her her positive attitude, and Bar Hashem, it's trending in a positive direction, should continue to do so. Um, I may have asked some Sean up. So, John, you were saying with our incredible numbers, we I think we eclipsed two million listeners.

SPEAKER_02

Well, I do want to say to everybody who's new to the show, welcome aboard. We're really excited to have you. As Allison says, don't forget to like and subscribe. You can follow us on uh Apple Podcasts, on Spotify, on YouTube, and as we said last week, we're now on Amazon Podcast, which is wait, and I know I know I said I wouldn't say it, but at the barbecue, at my family barbecue last night, happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there.

SPEAKER_04

It's true. My family was claiming they couldn't find us. So I was telling them about YouTube that there's a new site, that they have video shorts and longs. Um but then my brother was saying that there's a there's a um YouTube is a new site, a website that we had to be on, and I was so delighted to see at the table, he kept on saying for the last like six months he's been saying this podbean, podbean, podbean, podbean. And hate to break it to you. We're on podbean also. Yes, we are. Oh, there we go. I I said it was like the lot less of podcasts, but it's still it's a podcast streaming network.

SPEAKER_03

What we're on podbeam, it's a podcast streaming network. Yep, we're on it. We're on there, and not only that, but we're like the number one on good pods. Not only is Jewish, but also dad-oriented podcasts, something like that. I don't know. They love us on good pods, they love us. I don't they they can't get any other traction. We should they should sponsor us. That's really what it comes down to. We're we're we're driving business for them. Anyway, but by the way, you're right. Welcome to all the the listeners. We figured ourselves out a little bit. I don't know, not in life, but in in podcasting, we've tried to figure ours ourselves out that we are trying to tell real life stories and trying to find the humor in life, the lightness in the the everyday. And uh thank God we've we've found our audience, I think.

SPEAKER_02

So, Asher, you are recently returned from Israel for a big family simcha that has a strong tie to the show. Tell us about it.

SPEAKER_03

It's true. So uh former guest, my sister Nava, and my nephew, Mayor Simchha, uh, my nephew's bar Mitzah, and he celebrated his bar Mitzah on Lag Baumer and over the past Shabbos, and it was so wonderful. We went, we had such a great time. So I want to wish a mazl tough to Mayor Simcha, his parents, Nava and Steven, and uh my my parents and my my sisters-in-laws, mazetov to everyone, and also to to Shua, Nesya, his siblings, and like Dave said, I'm sure our family is still currently listening to our podcast.

SPEAKER_04

And I expect them that they have always been loyal listeners, and we we hope that they are still listening in Israel.

SPEAKER_02

So, Dave, you had an idea for uh for a new segment to the show. Why don't you kick us off? So we always have a lot on our minds.

SPEAKER_04

And by the way, if you if you email us, we'll read all the all the comments, whether or not we like them or not. We read everything. That's just and um one thing that did come up was that we have a lot on our minds, and a lot happens over two weeks. So um, we're actually gonna give it might be our first contest, but naming rights. Um if you name this segment, then you could win a prize.

SPEAKER_03

And um this is what this has done really well for us in the past, by the way. So many people join in on our uh contest.

SPEAKER_04

That's why it's our first ever you will win a prize, prize, and um and basically you will be able to do that.

SPEAKER_03

Tesla Cybertruck. That's what it is. It's a Tesla Cybertruck with the with the carbon guys.

SPEAKER_04

Somebody's gonna want to claim this. We're gonna be in lawsuits sitting there like with a lawyer, we could barely afford like that guy from Pepsi who who won the phone.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, with the plane, with the airplane.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Uh editor's note, we are not giving away a cyber truck.

SPEAKER_04

We're not giving away a Tesla. We we we'll probably have some hopefully some swag coming down the pipeline. But we're gonna just be in the beginning of every episode, we're gonna go around the room and we're gonna quickly just say something, whether or not it's personal, whether or not it's it's something that happened in the news, going on right now, whatever it is. Um, and we're we're just excited. It's gonna be a short, just little update. You know, in in uh there's a there's a show I don't usually listen, but this show called it's like a Z100 or something, and they and they go around the room, they they they talk about different things on the belt, you know. I like to, you're like, I don't I I don't really listen, but yes.

SPEAKER_03

Listen, when somebody does something good, you you just steal from them. That's what it is. Okay. So John, you're the oldest, so you could start.

SPEAKER_02

It's true. Thanks. Okay, this is on my mind. Usher, you you mentioned this, but it's it's it's there, and I feel like at some point I actually want to do a show on this, but more and more reading in the news, aliens, and I'm just like waiting for the next shoe to drop. And I know like some people are are hearing this, they're like, Yes, John, we get it, Star Wars, aliens. I'm just every time I read an article, you know, Trump said that that Obama shouldn't be talking about this stuff, and Obama said that it's it's top secret, we can't talk. There's so much allusion to it right now that something I feel like is going on. Um, and then I actually uh I saw a tweet by my good friend Rabbi David Beshevkin, classmate of mine, high school classmate. Correct, correct. And uh one day friend of the show. And Rabbi Beshevkin was tweeting about if it if we find out that there are in fact aliens. The question was like, well, how does that impact your uh theological observance, your Jewish observance or whatever? Where does that what you know, where does that put you? So this has been on my mind. Um, I don't know what to think. Part of me is hopeful, part of me is extremely fearful, but uh that's that's where I'm at. That's on my mind.

SPEAKER_04

Is that like what you're waiting for?

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

We are as soon as they reveal themselves, we are the podcast they are going to choose to go on. It's not Joe Rogan, they're gonna go on the carpool guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, if they journey here, they went on a carpool.

SPEAKER_04

So um speaking of aliens, I'm curious to know, like uh while this alien business is going on, the the Hunta virus is going on. Yeah. And I'm I'm a little I'm not concerned about it yet, but I I don't like when you see numbers going up. I think that's true. Is a case now in New York, it got uh the cruise line, you know, if and and the the story about it where two guys were bird watching, had to go into a dump and start start uh you know climbing on rat feces. That's what that's where it came from. It comes from mice droppings. It came from people who were bird watching. People were bird watching, and they they climbed into a dump, uh, like a garbage dump. Dumpster. And uh no, not a dumpster. No, like a landfill. Like a landfill. And they they contracted this disease, and they went onto this cruise, and then they and then and people have died, and uh, and now that's an emergency thing from the national guidelines of emergencies, and um kind of like what COVID was. Those are very serious. They had a name for it.

SPEAKER_03

From the National Guidelines of Emergencies is very serious.

SPEAKER_02

I feel like we're still all a little bit uh we have trauma from from the COVID experience.

SPEAKER_03

This is what it was like in like 19 you know, 20. It was like, oh my god, do you guys remember in 1918 when the this don't I would just say like if you see like mouse dropping somewhere, don't like start playing with it.

SPEAKER_02

This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I read that article and I thought, you know why they go to the landfills? Why did they go to the landfills?

SPEAKER_04

I was just short of you're the dumbest person I've ever heard. No, he wasn't saying you, he about in the landfill.

SPEAKER_02

I Dave, I am with you. These guys are the dumbest people. Like they went to the landfill because the birds eat at landfills because there's like garbage, there's like food for them. So they knew that's the best bird watching. But can you imagine? Like, yeah, I'm gonna go birdwatching on a landfill. And I mean, yes, I'm gonna be walking in like poop and and in garbage, but but birds. That's like that's like that's like sticking your head in the toilet being like toilet fish.

SPEAKER_04

Is that like goldfish after you uh just saying if you hear that the the the most aquatic fish are are are under the the the the you know the cesspool you are blowing bubbles because you want to see the green the green alien fish.

SPEAKER_03

So now we have another global pandemic coming our way because of the guys who jumped in the landfill to watch the birds. That's what you're telling me. That's pretty much what's going on. And and there are cases, there was a case in Israel, and there's a case in America in New York. Guys, settle down. I understand. This is the this is I really want to ask this question. Number one, John, two things. Are you more afraid of aliens or chat GBT?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, it's like which one's gonna get us first, AI or aliens? It's like which which movie am I more afraid of? Independence day or terminator?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, that's a good question. Okay, and don't ask Dave because he's neither he's seen neither of those.

SPEAKER_04

I no I'm just thinking you you you commented, okay, but he just dated himself with Terminator. I mean, I know that dating himself, it's a classic. It's a classic from from like our early adult childhood.

SPEAKER_02

Is Matrix better? If I say matrix, is that that's better, right? Not much better, but it's like that's a fair point.

SPEAKER_03

The matrix is also an AI.

SPEAKER_02

So I think I'm I think I'm theoretically more afraid of aliens, but I am practically more afraid of AI. But the thing is, AI also is really super helpful, and the aliens are not yet super helpful. You don't know.

SPEAKER_03

Maybe we've reverse engineered all of this and we they've been very helpful.

SPEAKER_02

I guess, right? What if AI is really just alien tech? It's a good point.

SPEAKER_03

And now, Dave, I have the following question for you. It it's true that the pandemic was horrible and people died, and it was horrendous, and we know people who lost loved ones, and it's very, very, very horrendous. But were there good things that happened during that time that you were like, I didn't have to wear pants for three months? That was nice.

SPEAKER_04

So so there as as with everything, there are positives that come out of it. Um, I did win the the Tannebaum family won the young Israel of West Hempstead video competition. That's I remember that. You guys we did win um $200 to to like godly was Oma's, Wing Wong, uh, Soly's. Wow.

SPEAKER_02

Um, we split it, we split it up. Can I just point something out? Usher's like, I know that a lot of people died, but hashtag no pants. Yeah. Jeez, for God's sake.

SPEAKER_03

I was gonna just jump into the pants part, but then I didn't want people to do it. I didn't want people to sit there and say, like, oh, it's not only that, but everyone that I know is like, oh, I haven't got to work since the pandemic. I'm like, I went to work the first September after the pandemic, and I have not stopped going to work. I didn't go to the phone. I went to work earlier than that.

SPEAKER_04

Anyway, we went during the pandemic. You went during the pandemic. So I had it, I had a lot you weren't going to be. I checked in on some of the homes. You went after I was quarantined. I I did did go to some of the home.

SPEAKER_03

Did you get a letter that you were a uh what was that called?

SPEAKER_04

A writ uh a danger that that's uh Aitan got it.

SPEAKER_03

No, did you get it that you were what was it called that essential worker? No, it's yeah, essential worker.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, we had we all had it.

SPEAKER_03

We all had I had a letter also that I was essential worker. I was like so proud of myself. I was like, look at me, I'm essential. So nice. You and uh the lady at ShopRite, you know, you got the same letter. So my personal story, is it my turn yet? I'm sorry, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I'll show you.

SPEAKER_03

I was at a wedding last time.

SPEAKER_04

I thought you were just gonna do trivia instead.

SPEAKER_03

Would you rathers? That's we would like to do would you rathers, but this is where I'm going with this one. I was at a wedding of a, I would say, longtime listener, or not necessarily yet longtime listener last night. And I'm sitting there at with my wife, and you know how the cup the parents of the of the couple or the couple themselves comes around and they take pictures at the tables with everybody. So we're sitting there and taking the picture. They happen to have been my cousins. Everybody who was there who knows, you know who they are. It's fine. I just don't feel the need to name drop. Um uh it was Jerry Seinfeld. So we're we're sitting there at the wedding, and they come around and they whisper in my ear, by the way, we love the podcast. And I'm like, Amazing. This is like your most exciting moment of your life, your son's wedding, and you're focused on the podcast. It's amazing. It's amazing. Yeah, but that's under the hood.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, I'm not I'm not surprised at all. It's like when you ever see like where like Shaq shows up to a wedding or Trump shows up to a wedding, you are the celebrity.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I guess you're like Shaq in every way. In every way.

SPEAKER_03

Other than the obvious tall one. No, Shaq's also I think I've seen videos that people love Shaq. Like he comes over, they he like people will give him a hug, they'll start crying, he'll give them a kiss on their cheek. He's he's like lovable in that way. I wish I was more like him. I'm Googling is Shaq a real person, a middle child? You think he's a middle child? I feel like he comes from a big family. I mean, uh obviously tall family, but is he a middle child? I can't find it.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, fair enough. Research this for next time. Maybe I'll do a little drop-in when I edit.

SPEAKER_03

But we did we really did have a great time on this trip to Israel. And then I came back. I flew, we flew in Tuesday night, Wednesday morning. Why are you laughing at me?

SPEAKER_04

And we realize I just should have gotten busted. I'm like, I had a little bit of an AD moment, and I just answered something on a WhatsApp that we are all three of us are all three of us. We're a third of this WhatsApp group right here. Right, we're a quarter of it, and yeah, and yet and yet I feel the need to answer to it.

SPEAKER_03

Sorry. I'm not judging you, it's fine. Okay, yeah. What did you write? I didn't write anything. You put a picture? Yeah. Of what? Well, that's so nice. Anyway, so now that we're all distracted, so we got back. I landed Wednesday. Uh it was Wednesday, like I pushed through. I was like soldiering through. I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna get through it. And I had a client at eight o'clock at night. I was like, I'm gonna make it through. I'm not taking a nap, not taking a nap. Everybody in my house fell asleep at 7:30. I had a client at 8 o'clock, I had a good meeting, and then Thursday came and I felt this incredible wave of exhaustion that I have not felt in years. And it just reminded me of like I'm always tired. It's not just it's not like jet leg is like a new thing. I am always tired all the time, and I'm not sure when it started. I I feel like I've been tired since like I'm 21 years old. I I don't know. So like this was this was something I floated to you guys. I imagine that many people our age and people younger and John's age also feel like they're tired all the time. And I'm curious, like, I we this is already a well-established fact that everybody knows I don't drink coffee after 11 o'clock in the morning because I will not be able to fall asleep at night. But I am always tired. So I'm gonna go to John. John, I'm passing this to you. This is gonna be our topic of the day. Why are we always tired all the time?

SPEAKER_02

All the time. I'm exhausted, all the time. And it's it's a physical exhaustion, there's a little bit of a mental exhaustion for sure. But I've also hit the point now where I hit a wall. And we we've been talking about this. Like we record at night, you know, a little peek behind the scenes. We record at night, and uh and we're all exhausted by the time we're done recording the pod. But I 10 o'clock ish, maybe even before that, I'll hit a wall and I'm like, forget it. I'm I'm cooked for the night. But do you go to sleep at 10 o'clock? I'm usually, I would say in bed at around 10, and hum and I watch a show for five minutes and then she's asleep. But it it's it's I think it's more than that. I just I there's not there's never a day, there's never a day um where it's not packed with stuff that needs to happen. And I think that uh I don't know if it's just the parenting part, but I think life has become this just uh speed train of no there's no stopping and and it's just everything's constantly going. And I think that really wears you down.

SPEAKER_04

So I I would say that I I mean, first of all, full disclosure, 15 minutes before this podcast, Avi woke me up and said, Don't aren't you aren't you doing a podcast tonight? I was sitting on the recliner and I was out cold. So a hundred percent I relate. Does your wife get upset at you about this?

SPEAKER_03

Well that you're taking naps during the day?

SPEAKER_04

It wasn't a nap. It was I I was just You were sleeping for the night. Fell asleep. My wife does not like that I take naps. I do find myself falling asleep a lot more a lot more often that than ever before. I I think a large part of it has to do with the fact that we we don't have a stop. And I and I know I'm gonna get I'm gonna get in trouble for this because I'm really not the most helpful in the morning or at night. But like the the day starts at six o'clock.

SPEAKER_03

That's true.

SPEAKER_04

And then it goes, and then and especially now that we have like older kids, they don't go to sleep. So they so it's it's just a con it's really besides the fact that we have work and life in between, we there's like no like downtime. I think that's always but there's no downtime for most people.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, there's also there's always something to do now with like with with our phones, right? So like there's never not something on, there's never not an activity or a game or like a something for you to do. You know, like I was thinking, you know, as we were prepping for the show a little bit and I was I was reading through some different things, and thinking back to as a kid, so so we didn't have all this stuff. You had the shows that we watched or the sports that we watched, but everything was at a fixed time. And if you didn't see the show at that time, so it's over, right? You missed it, and it's gonna be on again next week or whatever it is. But this notion that all of TV ever is now available to us.

SPEAKER_03

But nowadays, I think more to the idea that we we can't be bored anymore. Yeah, there is no bored, there's no bored. There's my kids, they're bored for 13 seconds and they're like, Oh, I'm bored. And it's like, you don't know what boredom is. But uh to me, I'm I look, I am very, very, very guilty of going to sleep way too late. Way too late. Like, I will be sometimes up till one o'clock in the morning, one thirty. It's terrible, and there's no reason for it at all. There is absolutely no reason for me to be up that late. Um, I it's just crazy. Sometimes I'll be up late and I'll be like, oh, I'll call my parents in Israel now because they're awake now, and that's what it is. But it's it's I am I wake up in the morning, I'm like, do you know that feeling? And maybe it I want to know if you can relate to it. I'm and I wonder if people out there in Listenerville relate to it. Do you know that feeling when? You wake up in the morning and you're like, I can't wait till I get back into bed tonight. Yes. Yeah? Yes. Dave?

SPEAKER_04

I mean, well, that's when I wake up to go to the bathroom at two o'clock in the morning.

SPEAKER_03

Well, oh my god, I hope I fall back asleep. That's that's b so by the way, so Mayor Simchas Barmitzva on Friday night. I so we had landed Thursday after it's so weird. You land Thursday afternoon after leaving at 12 o'clock on Wednesday and whatever it was. So you miss the entire Thursday. And then so we had one day of being awake, and then Friday night, I'm like, oh my god, there is no way I'm gonna be able to get up for the bar mitzvah. My kids woke up at like 12 o'clock on on Friday. There was I was so nervous, and I woke up at three o'clock in the morning and I could not fall asleep the entire night of Friday night because I was like, we are in a basement apartment, there is no light, I'm going to sleep through this bar mitzvah. My sister will never speak to me ever again. And it was, I was I literally was up the whole night. I woke up, I'm reading, I'm like tossing and turning. I was trying to be like calm about it, but I was like, I was, you know, it's it was not a pleasant feeling when you're just up all night long.

SPEAKER_04

So this is something more in my old age, I guess. But I can't sleep away from home. I've never I'm just choose I've never been able to. Like we were we were in Boston last week for a bar mitzvah, and I absolutely like I just don't sleep at night.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. I have a hard time sleeping away from home also.

SPEAKER_03

I love just sleeping at home. I don't enjoy sleeping. I think it's it's either the bed um that I don't always enjoy.

SPEAKER_02

Let me ask you guys a different take on this. Do you think that an element of this is is because of like the Jewish lifestyle is more taxing?

SPEAKER_03

Meaning, like you and I think you think that people who are not religious or not Jewish are new.

SPEAKER_02

I think that there's an element of, you know, for somebody who who's not Jewish or for somebody who's not, you know, Shabbos observant, that Saturday is just a chill day. And I think that there might be a value in that. We obviously have Shabbos as a built-in, you know, quote unquote day of rest.

SPEAKER_03

Did Donald Trump say that everybody, all Jews, should celebrate Shabbos? Yes. This Shabbos.

SPEAKER_04

Yes, he's doing a bit of Shabbos, Shabbos across America from uh Donald Trump.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, Trump's all in on it. Yeah. Tell me.

SPEAKER_04

Honor the American America's 250th birthday.

SPEAKER_02

But so Dave, okay, you and I both do security. Um we volunteer once in a while for for school security, and we have to wake up earlier in the morning. So think about it. Like that that wasn't a laugh line that you both do security. Very intimate. It's called Operation.

SPEAKER_04

I'm very appreciative that you do it, but I do it for the donuts.

SPEAKER_02

For the donuts. But it's it makes it a long day. It's an it becomes an exhausting day. There's a lot of time spent in shul. And the Jewish lifestyle that's that revolves around both the synagogue and the yeshiva, right? So all of a sudden, we're way more involved in the community than I think a lot of people are because there's all the there's all the the extra com extra curricular, extra community stuff on top of the fact that our kids have a double long day because of the dual curriculum. And then we're involved in shool events and we're involved in school events on top of all this. So I think there might be an extra Jewish.

SPEAKER_04

Are you saying, no, is this a new are you are you trying to, I'm not picking on you. It's not not the school of mock. But are you saying that this is like a newfound thing? Or is this because our parents also were at our fatigue right now? No, no, I'm saying for us, I like I think we're at that. I think this is the wheelhouse of like like we're just starting to feel aches and pains. I don't know if anybody saw, like, at some point during this podcast, I switched over because I my leg was feeling like cramped up and dead legs. You know, it I get into my car in two stages. I have a gray hair right here. You know, like like think we're we're just so we we're not we we spoke about it when I was with Asher a few weeks ago, which is which is like like we're not the same. We can't go to sleep at one o'clock and expect to get up at four o'clock, you know, or five o'clock. Like things are changing with us. So we have now that we have um, you know, we're our kids are more active, we're more active, we're doing more carpools, more pickups, more drop-offs. And then and then and then and then we're Jewish, yeah, John. We're Jewish also.

SPEAKER_03

I think there's a I think you're talking about practical sparks. I think the anxiety of life nowadays is really something that we're not speaking about. The rat race is certainly part of it, that we're constantly on the move, constantly trying, trying to hustle to try to make a living. But then there's anxieties that like I don't know if it really these types of yes, it's true. We're not running from the Nazis, and you know, it's true, but there's anxieties about our life that it just, you know, it just doesn't exist. Like when we were in Israel, the kids they run around. We they they don't care. They're the parents don't care, they're not worried about them running in the streets. Lagba Umer, we were watching like two-year-olds light up fire that was 45 feet tall. Like nobody cares in there about these types of things. And I'm walking down the street with my kids on on Shabbos, and I saw some guy walking towards us. I'm like, is he holding what's he holding in his hand? Is he oh, it's a phone. Like, okay, like like there's a level of anxiety that we're living with here nowadays in 2026 that is so weird and it just makes us exhausted. And we're always just like you, I think you said, we're always waiting for that next shoe to drop. We're always concerned that something's always gonna happen. And we're we're worried about this person who's sick, that person was sick, this thing that's going on, and it's a lot, it's a lot.

SPEAKER_02

Do you guys ever feel like there's also um just the way everything is now with tack, there's no escape from from work stuff. So, you know, uh, I took off a few days uh a couple weeks ago um after after surgery, and uh so I was actually like, you know what, this is great. Like arrested.

SPEAKER_03

You didn't get a leg amputated, John. You had a nose thing cleared out. Wow. After surgery. You have had a really serious surgery in the past. No, this was correct. I have nose.

SPEAKER_02

No, but that's my point.

SPEAKER_04

So his inside of his nose was taken out.

SPEAKER_03

No, I'm not gonna give him a break. In other words, no, people are lit. No, people are sitting here listening and they're like, Oh my god, what happened to John? He no, I'm fine. I'm obviously he had his sinuses cleared out, it's not a big deal.

SPEAKER_02

No, it's not, but I took off three days, one day for the day of the surgery.

SPEAKER_03

You should make a Suda Soda after this one, John.

SPEAKER_02

Yes. We're gonna tell that story one day. It's gonna be amazing. The Suda Soda story. But I took off the day of the surgery and then two days afterwards to recover. So I put on my email away message, and actually for the the first day I put away my phone for most of the day, and I just like relaxed, and it was it was amazing. Just like I didn't have to do anything. But when I took my phone back, so like my email had the auto away message on, but there was no stopping WhatsApp, and my WhatsApp was out of control, messages piling up, and that like that absolutely caused an anxiety for me of like this there's gonna be a mountain of messages I have to get back to, and they're all waiting now because I don't have like a WhatsApp away message, and I know there's WhatsApp for work. I I know that for businesses, I know that exists, but I don't have it. So what do you do? What is WhatsApp for business? I've never heard of this before. There's a WhatsApp for business that has the ability, I guess, to put up like an away message. Wow. So I don't have it, but you have to get a special.

SPEAKER_04

I agree with you. There, there we we are so connected to our phones that there's no off button. Yes, and that is exhausting. Even even like sometimes when I play like two backgamming games in a row, like my thumb starts getting stuck in that, like, in that position. So really, no, they're they're really I think we're nonstop, and I think some people on WhatsApp are like super like like have to comment on everybody's comments.

SPEAKER_03

You're right, and this is something that did not exist, it really exists it did not exist when our parents were our age. They did not have there was a phone on the on the wall, maybe they had a cell phone, a flip phone, whatever. They did not have a constant barrage of information coming at them all day, every day. It's true. Yeah, 100%. 100% this morning. And it's there's no I have no fault with these the parents that did it, every right to do it. Before I even got to school this morning, I got two messages. Can you check into these two things? It was like before I don't know, seven something. And they I don't fault them, and I don't have to deal with it at that moment. It was like they were trying to tell me, When you get to school, can you please deal with it? And it was ever they have every right to send it to me, but it just it my day started that much earlier today. Now, everybody in my family was throwing up last night, so that was what started our day. Anyway, and shout out to my wife. My wife is the one who handles the throw-up in the family, so I really credit to her. She is a hero in every way, shape, or form. She also has a philosophy that she wills herself not to get sick. I don't know how she does it. I have no idea. She does it.

SPEAKER_04

So I actually um wanted to just mention a funny thing about being tired. I uh went to a bar mitzvah a few weeks ago in Boston. Did you really? Yeah, I think I mentioned it like 10 minutes ago.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, I don't remember. But um no, you mentioned that in the WhatsApp group that you were texting in. No, he literally just said Well, I literally just mentioned it 10 minutes ago, okay.

SPEAKER_04

So um during the speeches, I guess like I became that old guy during the speeches. At one point, I got like such an elbow from Avi. Oh my god. I was snoring so loud, and people were like looking at me giggling. And then if it doesn't make it worse, I was like fighting myself. I'm like, stay up, stay up, and then I had one of those loud hiccups, you know, though, like you notice you mean you had sleep apnea and you stopped breathing for a second.

SPEAKER_02

So sleep apnea during the rabbi speech is not what you want.

SPEAKER_04

I was literally that guy who was who was snoring and and like snoring and hiccupping in the middle of in the middle of sleep.

SPEAKER_03

Were you embarrassed? Were you embarrassed when you woke when they when she woke you up?

SPEAKER_04

No, I was just I wasn't I looked around every you know you look around hoping that nobody noticed, but like everybody's staring at you.

SPEAKER_03

I fell asleep at somebody, I may have been at John's house. I don't remember whose house it was, and I fell asleep on the couch and I woke up and everybody's looking at me. I was there for that. You were there for that. And then like you really snore a lot. I was so embarrassed. So embarrassed.

SPEAKER_04

It was probably me that made that comment.

SPEAKER_03

I don't think it was, I don't think it was you. No, it wasn't. It was a female of wife of one of our friends. Yes, it was embarrassing. Was it Mrs. Tatamel? Shout out to Nachama Ackerman.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, okay, good. At least she was coming from a medical standpoint. Yeah, from medical standpoint.

SPEAKER_03

I don't think it was Nakama. I don't, I don't think. It might have been that it was Avi. I don't remember who it was. You would think it was Avi.

SPEAKER_02

Asher is trying to really sound like a backtrack on this. What?

SPEAKER_03

Whatever it was, I didn't know that Dave was there, and it was Avi. Anyway, the point is.

SPEAKER_04

And it doesn't sound it doesn't sound like her though, but I think we were all watching.

SPEAKER_03

I was so mortified when I woke up. I was like, oh my god, this is so embarrassing. You know what we need?

SPEAKER_02

I'm tired and I snore. What do you want from my life? We're all we're all there. We're all with you. You know what we need. You guys remember AIM, like instant messenger from a bunch of years ago? Remember, my father still uses it. Oh my it still exists.

SPEAKER_03

My father still uses the the AOL clients. You come into his office and he goes, You've got mail. I'm like, I love it. God mail.

SPEAKER_04

Is that is that when we used to go like like ASL school? Remember that.

SPEAKER_02

And you're school. Wow. Yeah, I remember that. I remember that. But on the instant messages, they used to have away messages where you could say, I'm away, and put up, and people would put up funny away messages or whatever. Like, we need life away messages. Like, I'm out today, I'm sick today, I'm whatever today. I'm on like everybody, leave me alone. What why does Apple not have an app that just for all of your stuff, your text, your WhatsApp, like I'm out today? They do, job. I hate the breaking to do.

SPEAKER_04

It's called the off button. It says this person's do not disturb is on.

SPEAKER_02

No, I no, the do not disturb, but I'm saying, like, if you're going away, like you can put up an email and automatic response, right? Telling people I am not working today. But like, why can't it also be that because that for me that's a thing. The text and the WhatsApps are like a huge anxiety for me. Because knowing that it's not only gonna pile up, but it's called like, you know, instant messages. Like it's it's they pile up and people expect a response.

SPEAKER_03

If you send somebody over to the case, I will this is a shout out to Hindi Schiff, mother-in-law of David Kesselman. Um, so I my I think I may have told this story already. My mother told me that when she divins in the morning in the house, she turns off her phone and no one can bother her during her divening time. I am guilty of not doing this. And the times that I am mindful to turn off my phone, my divening is exponentially better because it was not great in the first place, but it was it's exponentially better. There is an off button. We can turn the phone off. Now I am terrible about doing it.

SPEAKER_02

That's that's not what I mean because you can turn off your phone and you can ignore it, but the messages are still there, and people are expecting you to respond.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, that's fair. That's my problem is that I'm I'm I'm I'm like I know you're on 24 hours a day.

SPEAKER_04

I hear it goes away 24-7.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, wow. It was how long did it take you to get that one in there, Dave?

SPEAKER_04

I was waiting. I was waiting. I was actually waiting. To be honest with you, I think you are getting old, Osher, because I was waiting for maybe 10 minutes for you to say it. For me to say it? Okay.

SPEAKER_03

No, that's fair. Look, that is fair. There are people like my father-in-law is also a doctor, and he's been on call. Thank God, I believe it was his last Shabbos on call a few weeks ago. So he is retired from that life of being on call on Shabbos and Sunday and Monday. But it's it's a lot, and it's it's really, really exhausting to like you're saying, John, that you have so many messages to now catch up on and to respond to. It it's a lot for sure.

SPEAKER_02

So, do we have a practical?

SPEAKER_04

Do we want to tell people, hey, here's I mean, I think we all have to find find uh time for yourself.

SPEAKER_03

There is this app that we bought, and it comes with this thing. You have to like use it. It's called the Brick, where you could actually brick your phone to make it like not work. I actually bought it, we've never used it. Uh not that my wife wanted me to buy it because she said, Why are you buying that? We're never gonna use it, and we don't use it. So she was right. I'm shocked, Asher. No, she does say to me, like, Do you want to brick your phone? And I'm like, I will brick my phone when I want to break my phone. She's like, maybe do it now so you could be more present with the family. But I don't do that. It's like, it's almost like I it's it's you know, don't put baby in a corner when she says that. But regardless, I I think that there's we I we've talked about this in the past about being mindful to turn our phones off. I think that this level of exhaustion that we're talking about, the fatigue, is because it's very hard to be present in multiple arenas at one time. To be a father, to be a mother or a sibling or whatever, and to be present in your house and at the same time worrying about the fantasy baseball league, worrying about the shul, worrying about uh all these different things and and work and school, and uh it's too much. And worrying about the it's we need to be able to turn something off, and it can't be our family.

SPEAKER_04

It has to be I'm gonna say something even further. Not only technology, I think part of the fatigue is is that we're always on in general. Yes. And I think it's important to take a little bit of time, whether or not you exercise, which I haven't done in like 25 years, or whether or not it is that you so I I wanted to that that your outlet is, is to make sure that you do it because I think that that's also refreshing for your body.

SPEAKER_03

So I want I'm glad you said that because I looked up, I was, you know, John did his research, I did my research on fatigue, and I looked it up on the Mayo Clinic because I wanted to know what were the reasons. Now, obviously, there are 30 diseases, which of course I have all of them because that's the type of hypochondriac that I am. But here are lifestyle factors. Okay, here we go. Alcohol or drug use. So I don't drink and I don't use drugs. Eating poorly, I certainly do that. You guys eating poorly? Yeah, and I'm getting better, but yeah. Okay, certain medications.

SPEAKER_04

Sorry about say that over again. We don't need to do alcohol and drugs. I skipped it.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, that's dangerous. Anyway, so medicines such as you ones used to treat allergies or coughs. So I, you know, certainly take those. Not enough sleep. Guilty. Too little physical activity. That's what you were saying. Guilty. But then on the other side, this is the reason why I don't exercise too much physical activity. Yeah, that's true. Could you make you really tired? I don't want to be more tired, so I don't want to exercise at all.

SPEAKER_04

I will tell you you also don't want to be be like ex like out of breath when you get to the bathroom.

SPEAKER_02

Right, that's true. But I'll tell you, you guys know I do a lot of bike riding and I feel so much better on the days when I go for a ride, a hundred percent feel better.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, except for when I used to bike ride with you and then I like got tendinitis in my leg.

SPEAKER_02

So it doesn't always tendinitis in your elbows from bike riding.

SPEAKER_03

And elbows and bike riding.

SPEAKER_04

Did I ever guy I know this is um I don't want to interrupt the mayo clinic, but just put it on hold for a second. I'm done with the mayo clinic. I did I ever tell you what happened that time the first time when I bought a bike in my married life? So we were in the apartment building in Brooklyn, and I told Avi, I said, I want to get healthy, I want to start bike riding again.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, I do know this too.

SPEAKER_04

Right? And we were walking, and and we were we were looking into bikes. I didn't want to spend so much because I didn't know how long this would last. And I got a bike, it was half built, and and a friend came, then he put it together, and I'm like, I gotta go biking. I gotta try this thing. And I got the new helmet, I got the the bike, and we go outside, and I I rode, obviously, like, be careful. You know, it was already like 10 o'clock at night. She's like, be careful. I rode to the middle of the block. We were on IN 16. I drove to maybe the middle of the block to in between I and J. And I I put the bike, I'm feeling like lousy. I put the bike, I lock it up, and next thing you know, I call Avi. Said, You have to come downstairs. She's like, Why? I'm like, just come downstairs, come down the elevator. She goes down the elevator, I was laying, and this is like full circle, because I was I was laying half in the in the garbage room. Uh right, so so this virus, I could have had it 16 years ago, half in the garbage room, and half by the elevator. You couldn't even open up the elevator. I was white as a ghost, I passed out. 10 half a block, literally like 10 pedals of bike riding. Not even, you know, where he's doing these 30 mile things. I don't think I did 30 feet.

unknown

Oh dear.

SPEAKER_04

And I was white as a ghost, I passed out. So be careful with exercise. Be careful with exactly.

SPEAKER_03

I don't recommend it either. You're a hundred percent correct. I do you ever see somebody who did act who didn't exercise pull a muscle? Did you ever see somebody get need uh rot rotator cuff surgery because they didn't exercise? No, yeah. Forget about it. I'm not exercising. Not a lot of Achilles tears. Yeah, I'm not exercising ever again. Never.

SPEAKER_04

When's the last time you saw a fat person have a heart attack? I mean, come on.

SPEAKER_03

Oh boy, and we found our first clip of the episode.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I will say this. I will say for for if you're able to, taking sick days, I appreciate those a lot more. Just coming back to the idea of resting. Absolutely taking a sick day to like just do nothing is is an amazing feeling. So I take David Days. I recommend it.

SPEAKER_04

You take David Days. Take what? David days are days where I just take off and I do my own stuff. Well, you go yeah, you go to see movies, right? I do anything, yeah. But but once uh twice a year or so I do David days.

SPEAKER_03

When I used when I was younger, I used to take quote unquote mental health days more frequently. Nowadays, it's just not possible with the kids, and it's just not, it doesn't work out. So whatever. But you're right. I think that's true. Take a day for yourself. Yeah. Yeah. No shame in it. We have a question of the week. We're ready. I'm ready for it.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, here we go. And we actually, by the way, Osher, for the record, man who accuses me of making up questions of the week.

SPEAKER_03

We have for for episode upon episode upon episode. But we've never made up. But here we go.

SPEAKER_04

Um so somebody. Emailed us and if you and if you want to claim it, you could still. Yeah, they didn't sign this.

SPEAKER_03

And sponsor question of the week, by the way. We're looking for sponsors for question of the week. And if you want to sponsor the entire episode, we're happy to have sponsors. John is looking into one of his uh business, uh whatever it's called, Connections, who is gonna be our first sponsor. But we would love to have our first sponsor be you. Go ahead. Question of the week. I like how you licked your finger there. And then again, it's one line. Where is it? Exactly. Like, where did you bury this?

SPEAKER_01

Hey, where the heck is this? Give me a second. From Anonymous in Comac. Bear with me here. Here we go.

SPEAKER_04

We got an email from somebody in Comac, New York, and the last four of their of their phone number was 0476.

SPEAKER_03

I don't think that they were really in Comac, New York, because somebody told me they sent this question in. I know, but that's where their phone was bought, maybe. Fine. It's a burner. People are embarrassed. People are embarrassed. Embarrassed too.

SPEAKER_04

Is that why sometimes our numbers are low? People are listening to us on burner accounts. Exactly. That's what it's like. Oh my god. It's a firm one. If you can live in any particular, what would it be?

SPEAKER_03

So is this our first non-food related? It might be. It depends what day we have.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no, we've had we've had we've had non.

SPEAKER_03

We have never had a food non-food related question of the week. Never.

SPEAKER_04

No, I think we had the last one was non-food, but you made it food.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

So we're not gonna No no last one was food. Last one was food.

SPEAKER_03

I I'm gonna I think John went first on our first uh our naming rights for round robin, something, whatever. John went first. So Dave, I think you should go first. What Parsha?

SPEAKER_04

So I would have to say, I mean, I was thinking like by Chris Yamsuf, but then I realized that's exercise. Does he have to walk through it?

SPEAKER_03

It's not like you had to swim. I should have made it easier. Actually, you know what you don't see that person on the like the old it's literally the old man part of the pool where you could walk and you're complaining that you have to hold and we sing from from uh from Prince of Egypt.

SPEAKER_04

It can be miracles.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just picturing Bosha comes and tells everybody Hashem's freed us, we're gonna go. Everybody, let's go. And Dave raises his hand. Uh do we do we have to go? Are there chariots? I wouldn't do that.

SPEAKER_04

Like maybe five minutes in, John. I'll be like, you guys go, I'll catch up. That's why they blazed down.

SPEAKER_03

That's why it took 40 days for us to get through the desert because David's resting. 40 years in the desert because Dave is taking his time. I'm sleeping here. So so it's not Krius Yamsa.

SPEAKER_04

No, no, no. That's my pick. I'm gonna stick. Okay, he's sticking. I think it was probably a pretty cool uh, you know. Speaking of Kumzitz, people like Kumzits, we were probably singing like crazy down that, down, down that walkway, you know?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, yeah. I like it. And Shmuram Matzah on the trip. Good choice. Good choice. John, you are up. I'm gonna go Noah. I love the whole the Noah story to be in that parshad. Now, yes, probably I wouldn't survive being in that par sha I'd be dead.

SPEAKER_03

I think the questioner is not saying would you be a person there? He's saying a fly on the wall during the time of the body. No, it's a you want which what okay? Yes, but I don't think the questioner is saying that you would be dead.

SPEAKER_04

That's like John, you're amazing. You picked something that you'd be dead in. Well, John is the Bahor.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Parsha's Bahorus also. You want to pick that next?

SPEAKER_03

I think John always thinks of death as he has reached his 90s.

SPEAKER_02

I think the whole Noah story would be just so be so cool to see how the Teva and the animals, but also the afterwards of like restarting everything, just all the craziness going on in the world, like literally so crazy that God's like, enough. I've had enough of literally all of you. You know, like we're gonna start over. I think it'd be cool. I also like in like the end of Noach when you have like all the names and all those people started countries. Everything is so weird.

SPEAKER_04

You know, I think back to Asher, you would want to be a fly on the wolf for that thing.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, I would want to watch it as an observer, not hey, I'm alive, and the and the flood starts like, oh that that didn't work.

SPEAKER_04

Look at that guy building that up.

SPEAKER_03

Like I knew that was gonna happen. Man, I think for me, I I would probably want to live through the partios of Yosef. I think that is a very it's like my favorite part of the Torah. I find it just that so dynamic and confusing about the parenting choices, how they're really fighting, what ended up leading to them, to Yosef and Mitsraya. So to me, I find that very fascinating. And those are the partios I'd like to live through. So I would say like Vajhev, Mikates, Vajash, yeah, that whole thing.

SPEAKER_02

Can I ask you guys, is there a partial where if you could drop in and and tell somebody under no circumstances should you do what you're about to do, like to change a thing? Because you're like, no, no, no, do not do that. It's funny.

SPEAKER_03

I really I read a story from Rabbi YY Jacobson, I think it was Rabbi YY Jacobson, that when he was a kid, there was this woman in in the shul that every year it got to Parsha's Vaishev, and she would scream out at the top of her lungs, don't do it, don't sell Yosef, don't do it. And she was like traumatized, and then they got the rep the rabbitson of the shul. I'm probably forgetting it, it's probably somebody else, but I I'm pretty sure that's where I read it. And she was like traumatized, and and they got the rabbitson to speak to her, and the next year she's like, No. I told him last year, and he still did it. I wish that I had that same connection with the Parsios, but it was it was a very nice story. But you're right. I I I find that in the Megilla, in McGill's Esther, I find that I laugh when uh when when Haman comes to speak, and it's like, you know, the the dramatic irony gets to me every year.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I mean, I I I also like we we we always have those like don't hit the rock, Moshe. Just don't do it. It it'll come. Don't do it. Or or obviously, you know, the things that really screwed us for years, you know. Uh I think we I don't think anybody would have listened to me, but right.

SPEAKER_02

I think I would have. I think it'd be funny to like go to Avraham when when Sarah's like, you know what you should do? You should marry like our cleaning lady. And I feel like I want to like I always want to go up to Avram be like, under no circumstances should you do this. This is a terrible idea. Do not do this.

SPEAKER_04

Wait, just just to just to to to make it all first, full circle. I'm not make uh we we at Bar Hashem, um, thanks to our guests, thanks to our team, you know, we've really grown over the past several months, and I think it's truly incredible. But imagine like we were the podcast that they told to like spread the word like not to do the Keita Egel, and then like only like 30 people listening.

SPEAKER_00

Also, like and subscribe. Don't do Keita Egel, but like we got sick into the contest. And send it a question of the week.

SPEAKER_02

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, the question of the week has been our biggest engagement. People love it, they love it.

SPEAKER_04

Or everybody who listens to the podcast and tells us the the the you know, likes and subscribes and tells us the word um gets on Noah's Ark. Noach's taking. Also, I really want people to everybody's like, oh, I forgot about that podcast.

SPEAKER_03

I really want people to start commenting on our YouTube page, also. Like, throw a comment at the bottom. It doesn't hurt, it doesn't cost you anything. Not just anti-Semitic comments, also those other comments. We seem to get no matter what, so keep them coming, I guess. But the nice ones, yes, you know, what is your answer for the question of the week? Put it down there in the but in the comments section.

SPEAKER_02

And I would love to hear from our listeners. Comment, uh, send us an email. You can email us carpalguyspod at gmail.com or on one of our social medias. But tell us, are you exhausted? What is exhausting you, and how do you combat that exhaustion? Maybe we'll read a couple answers in the next show and uh let us know what you guys think. Guys, it's been a great show. Great show. Great job of fun. So, just a reminder, everybody, please follow us on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Give us a five-star rating. And uh we got some fun episodes coming up, so stay tuned for more.

SPEAKER_03

Is that about a four and a half?

SPEAKER_02

I mean, I'll take a four and a half. You can do half.

SPEAKER_03

There's always room for growth.

SPEAKER_02

It's not Amazon. Yeah, with a comment. Why? Why? Why did I only give them four stars? It's true. Okay. All right. So tight.