Freedom, Fireworks & Liquid Courage | Episode 18

As Americans prepare to celebrate Independence Day, Maxine and Isabelle explore one of the biggest drinking weekends of the year and how alcohol impacts the celebration. Inspired by a recent discussion on alcohol and creativity, they unpack the idea that alcohol helps us think more freely, examine the myth of "liquid courage," and reflect on what they've gained since choosing an alcohol-free life. Along the way, they explore whether the things we often credit alcohol for—creativity, joy, spontaneity, and fun—might actually have been inside us all along.

Liquid Joy: Blind Tiger

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hi everybody, I'm Maxine, and uh this is episode 18 of Happy AF.

SPEAKER_00 0:05

I'm happy alcohol free. And I'm Isabel, and I'm happy as fuck because I'm with you and you make me fucking happy. And also the weather.

SPEAKER_01 0:14

You make me happy. Oh my god. The weather, the weather, the weather. It is sunny outside, and I um I say this all the time, because we live in Vermont, right? I think many of us have real seasonal depression.

SPEAKER_00 0:30

And I went through it last week thinking, so all the men are gonna probably like turn off this part, but uh I told Brooks I'm going through emotional menopause. I had gone through menopause at 40 years old, as you know, because my uterus walked away from me. It was like, you're not using me, and you kind of you're waging a war against me. I was throwing every contraceptive I could fucking put my hands on. So it quit. But uh last week I was just like morbid, and why are we on this planet for? Why is life worth living when we live here only a hundred years? Like it's so short. What's the point? I'm finally at 54 at a place where I can breathe a little bit and not worry so much, but I'm gonna be dead in 40 years. So why am I even here? And like all this really crazy shit. And I told Brooks Still morbid. I told Brooks, I think it's emotional menopause. And I no, I think you're right. It had been very gray. Gray, gray, gray. And the difference is without booze, normally I would have had those feelings, but I would have reached out for booze and I would have drank and numbed myself through it. So you're just pushing it away, pushing it away, pushing away, waking up with hangovers. And this time I just had to sit, woo, what?

SPEAKER_01 1:41

Put my pants on and put your big girl put your big girl pants on. That's right. Um, I you just made me think of something there that you know. I have um we had a family friend living with us who's from Lyon. Right. Uh, this wonderful young French boy called Maxime. Um, very confusing in our house with Maxime and Maxime. And uh, but we were talking about weather the other day, and uh, you know, my my mediocre French, but we were describing it as being gray, and he he said, Oh, uh en franca we say um uh le temps à la Londres. Like it's it's weather like London.

SPEAKER_00 2:18

I've never heard that. And by the way, you know he said that we speak funny. Well, tell him I struggle to understand him too. With a little fucked up accent. His his French French. His French French. What is he thinking? And by the way, what do you mean? We call it gray. It's not London weather, although a little bit. But it is so true. It's so true.

SPEAKER_01 2:38

But it's finally sunny, so my emotional menopause has left. It's sunny, and we're so happy that it's sunny, and it's gonna be 4th of July. Um, speaking of drinking, because we're gonna talk about drinking and not drinking, and 4th of July and all the things that go with summer. Summer. Um, people loved, by the way, our last episode, which is called Summer Switch, about that switch to summer. People really enjoyed it. We've had a number of people already comment on how great it is for us to not interrupt each other.

SPEAKER_00 3:06

I know it's so, so hard. Look at us grow, though. So like good girl, it's so fucking hard. Now, if we weren't drinking it'd be just a big jello. But it is like we you and I are so funny. We're looking at each other like deer cutting head, like, are you done? Are you done? Can I go? No, but we have little hand symbols now. Yeah, we do. Very Queen of England. Ta-ta. Ta-ta. Um, but by the way, I'm still in the summer switch because it is early summer. Yes, yes, yes. And I have so much more to talk about that. We have so much more to talk about. So podcasts. Let's do a thing with me.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

I'm doing that. Oh, a what's it called? M M S. Is there a name? There's a name for it. I saw a guy on the internet. It's not, it's not. There's I'm thinking of all letters that go together now that are not right.

SPEAKER_00 3:59

But listen, there's a guy on the internet that doesn't ASMR. Is that what that is? ASMR. So there's a guy on the internet that makes a parody of that. He taped actually nails on his fingers, like real nails for like hammering, and he goes kick click click click click click on the boxes.

SPEAKER_01 4:14

Kind of thing like that happened when the TikTok uh COVID explosion. When I see it, it makes me it makes me angry when I see people. I like it.

SPEAKER_00 4:25

It is comforting. I don't have nails because I eat them super irritating. But it's probably because I don't have nails.

SPEAKER_01 4:31

I eat my nails. Anyway, we're going to go for it. Unbox with me. Unbox with me. Um so one more of it. I like it. Oh my god, the whole episode's just gonna be us going to end it. There's something singly about it. So open it up. Well, the the one of the benefits of our podcast growing and our listenership growing um quite exponentially at the moment, is that people are sending us stuff. We love being sent things. They're sending you stuff. I'm not getting shit. It's for us, it just comes to my house. Uh anyway, we're this is a box from the wonderful company, which I've talked about before because I love them. Okay. Blind Tiger is the name of the company. Rebecca is the CEO, one of my favorite names, because this is my daughter's name. And look at this beautiful packaging. Ooh. Um these are all the different oh, there's a lot of flavors. She says anything you want. So all of these flavors, you look at those. I'm gonna look at these. Okay. So this is the variety pack. Um, beesne's uh a mojito type drink. A mimosa. I have a question. And a lavender French 75. I already know. I'm gonna try that one. Beesne's is lemony, right? Isn't it oh here it goes? Bees' knees, pure honey and bright lemon flavor with juniper undertones. Yeah. Then the lavender French 75 is bright and bubbly with notes of lavender, lemon, and juniper. And Southside Mojito, uh, sparkling mint and lime blend with hints of juniper, and and sidecar mimosa. That's the one I tasted before, which I really loved. Um, so I'm gonna try the French 75. And then you have other ones there.

SPEAKER_00 6:15

Yes. So the ones I have is the classic Manhattan, which obviously is vermouth and sherry bitter, and grapefruit fizz. Now, what do you like? I might have to go for that mimosa. Yes. Um, remember, unlike you, I don't like just the cans.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

You don't like but beef it up with beef it up with something else.

SPEAKER_00 6:38

With NAM with yes, and NA mimosa and a gin. And I'll be honest with you, A, for the taste of the NA liquor. Yes. And B for the mouthfeel. A lot of these NA liquor, they add capsane. Yes, yes. The thing that makes pepper spicy, so it gives you that alcohol burn. So they makes you sip your cocktail like a real cocktail versus drink it versus drinking like your hydrating. So for me, that's a big deal.

SPEAKER_01 7:06

Okay, well, look at our lovely glasses.

SPEAKER_00 7:08

Their cans are remote. Our ice cube has melted. Oh, yeah, I hate that. So I was saying earlier, so we've had these cups with ice cubes. The difference between someone who has children and someone who doesn't, I go, there's water in mine. I'm gonna go empty it. Where's the tap or where's the sink? And um, Maxine was like, What do you mean? And she just chugged it, right? So, you know, I'm like, ew, but I will chug the ice water. It's just ice water.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

Um, all right, look how pretty this is. It's very uh great Gatsby. It's very great Gatsby. It's very um I also love the size of these. Yes. Oh, look, it's pink. Okay, I'm very happy about this. If we were not sitting in the recording studio, I would be putting a little sprig of fresh lavender from my.

SPEAKER_00 7:52

You have to doctor it up. Okay, everybody, this is a big deal. Like Mama Isabel here has a thing to say about that. Not because it's NA that you go naked. You gotta dress it up. Oh, yes. I will not have a cocktail without all the garden on top of it. Love, love. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

Look, guess what we do have the liquor. Look at these. The beautiful glasses. So these are our local, are they? What does it say under there? Oh boy. These are the are these things? These are Simon Pierce, right? Wow. Okay. Yes. These are Simon Pierce glasses, which I love.

SPEAKER_00 8:27

Um, which is uh Okay, I want to say something about that sidecar mimosa. It took me for a curve. Okay, so I was gonna like kind of poo-poo that it doesn't have the NA like liquor in it and blah blah blah. But it almost I still would add it, but it almost doesn't need it. Oh, good. Mine doesn't need anything.

SPEAKER_01 8:45

It got that that kick. So, and again, can I just go back to asking all of the restaurants to carry more of these things? I'm so impressed. Yes, it's got that kick.

SPEAKER_00 8:57

Holy shit, blind tiger. Thank you, Rebecca. Thank you. Cheers, blind tiger, we love you. Imagine, like, I'm getting a kick and it's naked. Imagine if you add a splash of NA tequila or NA Vaca.

SPEAKER_01 9:11

Love it.

SPEAKER_00 9:12

And then you put a bunch of little garnishes on that.

SPEAKER_01 9:14

Yeah, yeah. Wow. We have to do a whole like craft cocktail um making. Speaking of, you weren't able to come to our team dinner last week. No. But we went to uh my favorite local restaurant, one of my absolute favorite restaurants anywhere, actually, called Mystico. It's so good. In Manchester, Vermont. If you are here, you've got to go there. They just doubled, doubled their NA cocktail list. Wait, did they have any NA wine yet? No, not yet. No, but they're they're going there next. Great. They're going there next, but they doubled it. That's great. And here's the thing that I had never seen any restaurant do before. They had mocktails, and then they had a zero proof. So the mocktails have no um fake alcohol in it. People get triggered. So people who do not want so thoughtful. Yes. Um, Debbie and Luis, amazing, amazing owners of that restaurant. Thoughtful. So that have like lavender and all of these different, you know, lovely flavor profiles, but zero, zero anything that is mimicking alcohol. Then they had the zero-proof cocktail menu. Oh, but they did have zero, which has different brands of, you know, gin alternatives, rum alternatives, all of these things. It's unbelievable.

SPEAKER_00 10:32

Okay, because so I'm glad you're saying that because the first time, not the the few first times that I went there, they only add the mocktails that doesn't have any mimicking. Yes, and now I have this. I like, I don't get triggered by the taste of fake alcohol. It makes me happy, it makes me feel like I'm still a yeah, I like that burn. So so now they have the burning mocktail. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 10:54

Well, I mean, burning it sound like a selling point. It doesn't, it sells me. Yeah, but I'm actually it's funny. We were out for I was out for dinner with a friend last night, and um, this has happened a couple of times to me uh in the last year or two, where I've ordered a non-alcoholic drink and they brought me an alcoholic drink by mistake. So last night we think it was just a table mix-up that they brought the wrong drinks to the wrong table versus mishearing me. Um but but last night I ordered um the non-alcoholic rose, and she brought me our an actual rose. And but you can't tell, right? So it was in the glass. And I looked at it and it looked at like a different color, and I was like, mm. And then we were both not drinking, neither one of us, and uh not drinking alcohol. Right. And I tasted it and I was like, oh, holy shit, that is that is alcoholic.

SPEAKER_00 11:47

Or it's really, really close.

SPEAKER_01 11:49

Because no, because the hot burn on our throat now is like one sip of that alcoholic rose was like I had just done a shot of scotch.

SPEAKER_00 12:01

That's what it felt like in my throat. Funny you'd say that because every like I've talked about this that I had tried to moderate for years before I that's why I finally quit. There's no point. And um, and by the way, it's interesting because when I don't know about everybody listening, but for me, when I was trying to moderate, this is not something you publicize. Yeah, because then people will be like, okay, you do have a problem. Yes. So the problem with not having publicized this is now people are like, Well, I'm sure you could just have one, because they don't know how much I battled that, right? But anywho, my point is twice I quit for three months in my whole life. And when I would start again, the first couple of sips were like you are describing. Problem is after two sips, I'm like, oh, my brain lit up again. But you're right, your body's like, whoa, yes, ew.

SPEAKER_01 12:52

Yes. So, but I have to tell you the funny story about the other time that that happened to me in a local restaurant that um actually it wasn't, it was a new restaurant. The restaurant had just opened, but I know the bartender really well. Okay. For many years, she has made lots and lots of cocktails for me, right? Classic cocktails. Classic cocktails. I mean, uh, I love a real French 75. I love a um pear martini, was what was my one of my absolute favorite flavor profiles. Uh, anyway, the the server asked what I was drinking, and I saw the bartender was working, and I said, Oh, can you just tell Lexi to make me something delicious, non-alcoholic? And I don't know if I said the words non-alcoholic, or I said NA, or I said an alcohol-free, and I said a martini of some kind um would be delicious. So she brings it over to me, and same thing. I taste it, and I'm like, oh my God. I was like, that burnt my throat. And I was like, is that a mocktail or is that an actual martini? Right. And and so when the waitress came back, I said, so this has no alcohol in it, right? And she went, no, no, no, that's that's uh pure alcohol. It's it's an actual martini. Yeah. But she had misinterpreted what I said, and then she came back with a fake martini and she was like, Yeah, so sorry. I I I I didn't realize it was a mistake, but they they were so not attuned to hearing me specifically ask for something without alcohol.

SPEAKER_00 14:30

They could like the one with the alcohol, besides the burn. Was your body like, oh my god, I recognize this, this is good.

SPEAKER_01 14:38

Um, no. So or your brain. Trick question. Yes. My my not a trick question, a a complicated answer. Uh-huh. Because I took a sip of it and I felt the burn. Got it. And then I was like, ooh, that can't be that this can't be a mock tail. Uh-huh. And then I don't know who was with me, and I asked her to taste mine because she was having an actual martini. And um, oh yes, and my friend tasted it, and she was like, oh, that really tastes like alcohol to me. So then I took another sip of it, and then I was like, oh, confirmed. It's alcoholic. Right. So then we swatched, swapped it out, and then I would say about 10 or 15 minutes later, I definitely felt tingly. Right.

SPEAKER_00 15:21

And did your body want more? No. My body would have wanted more. I wouldn't have done it. I mean, I didn't know.

SPEAKER_01 15:27

But I'm saying my body my body wanted more versus the recognizing the feeling. Right. Right. I recognized that, like, ooh, the beginning of a num. Um, gosh, we have so much to talk about. It's like, no, no, but now I'm not.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

But a beginning of a numb. That article you sent me. So that was so interesting. So I was on Instagram and it was the worst timing for me because I was in the midst last week of my emotional menopause, which turned out to be seasonal defective disorders. Right. And also the worst timing, and I know this is not a propos today, but and cut me off if I go too long. But I've been experiencing, I'm not quite two years, but almost, and I'm never gonna drink again. I hate saying it. When I say it makes me feel weird. Yes. But there's not a part, it's not, there's not an open door, right? There's not an open door. The door is closed. But I don't like saying it. It's a weird thing. But my point is, I've been feeling that the further away I am from my quitting date, and the more my resolves question in the sense that you forget why you quit. So the first year, I never questioned why I quit. I never questioned maybe I should have one. I never questioned, am I exaggerating? But now that it's almost two years, like the bad things and the reasons have fade away, and you're often left with the romantic parts of alcohol, right? And I've lived to that with cigarettes. It was more difficult the second year than it was the first six months because of that. Well, maybe I should smoke on weekends, right? Yes. Um, so um, so that part of it, like it is like where I'd be like, I guess it is social. I guess I'm not social, right? Like, you know, and that fades. And then you remind yourself, but I'm saying you have these reactions. So just as I'm in the midst of that weird week, where, well, I guess I am not social, and I guess they are positive to drinking conviviality. They say it's good for humankind, blah, blah, blah. Right. There's this thing on Instagram where this professor, and I don't know what kind of professor he is, not doubting it, but he's some sort of a professor. And he was explaining about the effect. There's a man at Microsoft, I forget his name.

SPEAKER_01 17:40

No, Google.

SPEAKER_00 17:41

Was it Google? It was Google. Okay. So a man at Google, some big CEO at Google. Let's say his name was Mr. Miller, can't remember. And they talked about the Miller effect. Yes. Whereas Mr. Miller, when he would brainstorm with his executive team, and they would be hitting a stone wall. Yeah. He had a whiskey bar within the office, and they would go to the whiskey bar and have a cocktail because they found that in low levels of alcohol, you open up your brain, such as like when you're a kid where both sides communicate better.

SPEAKER_01 18:14

And you're in play mode.

SPEAKER_00 18:16

You're in play mode. And Mr. Miller, apparently not his real name, had found that that's the Miller effect. He had found that the guy didn't remember exactly what the amount of alcohol in his blood was, but let's say it was 0.68. It was very specific. No, it was 0.0 something. But he used that as an example. He wasn't sure, but there was a very specific low amount of alcohol in his blood that he found that that was the key to his creativity. And he actually had a drip to make sure they would stay at that level of alcohol. So that was this. So this guy was like, so it can open up creativity at a low level, blah, blah, blah. And so when I heard that, your first thing is like, there you go. There goes my fucking creativity. And then obviously the next two minutes, I'm like, well, if I could just stay at 0.035, that'd be great, which never ever has ever happened. Nor can that happen people. Nor can that happen to people. And number two, I remember thinking, huh, I wonder if they had found the same thing about heroin. Correct. Or cooking. But it's true. It would have come with a huge disclaimer. By the way, in low-level heroin can open, but you need to be under therapeutic guidance. You, you, it's highly addictive. There would have been all this shit. Yes. Whereas, like with the alcohol, it's like, well, so we opened the bar without any therapist or clinicians there, and you just have a couple of cocktails. You're right. There was all the disclaimers and the dangers of alcohol were thrown to the wind. So I after the, you know, but the first reaction is like, oh, there we go. I killed my creativity. And then, you know, you are you kidding me? And then you realize how ridiculous this is.

SPEAKER_01 19:49

And somebody who is an artist, like it's my job. It's it's it's what I do. Right. And so I hear that all the time. And and that um allure of going into the recording studio and getting drunk and high to get all of your best ideas out. And and and that's uh fake. That's false. Right. Right. What is true, and what this guy was talking about is there is that moment very low level. Small tiny window where you start to to let your defenses down, you start to let the juices flow like you did when you were a kid, and you didn't give up what other people thought, that that we can get there, and alcohol helps us get there. The problem is it's such a narrow window. As soon as you pass it, you're out. You're negated all of the good stuff. Not only have you negated the good, then you have to deal with the aftermath of all of what comes with the consumption, like of alcohol.

SPEAKER_00 20:57

Addiction. And the thing, it made me think also of I forget the name of the drug, everybody else knows it. I'm just a silly, I don't, I'm not very connected and I don't watch a lot of TV and stuff. But you know, what I think it's with LSD or what's the the scientific name, where they found that under therapeutic guidance, it can cure PTSD, it can cure depression, but it's like a very low dose, and you have a doctor and a therapist, and there's a whole protocol, and they guide you. So I felt as though probably with alcohol to hit into your creativity would have to be like that. But because it's alcohol, they're throwing caution to the wind. Yes, right. So, you know, there's still that whole like they're trying, I feel they're carbing at whatever positive they can about alcohol to not vilify it.

SPEAKER_01 21:45

The whole picture. And the whole idea behind that argument of c of this Google whiskey room for the creatives, it was to unblock their their stress and their tension. It's like any kind of addiction. How about you address the source of the problem? That's right. There's other ways to get there. Why is everybody so uptight as a as a species? That's right. I think you know this. I'm the chair of the board of an elementary school, a very small elementary school that is so unique. It's it's um forward-thinking, progressive, outdoor, experiential learning. The kids are in the woods every day. We just heard their graduation speeches where all of these children talked about how they love to play in the woods. And they they don't call it school because they're playing in the woods. But they're out there measuring and and and understanding uh ecology, right? Everything. And they're doing it under the guise of play, which you know, detractors of that method of of education say, well, they're not learning anything. They are meanwhile, they're all incredibly intelligent and and and high-achieving academic students when they go on, but they've learned, they've learned that ability to do and to so we lose it as human beings.

SPEAKER_00 23:04

Absolutely. I'll never forget. So when I was a kid, I picked up by my own oil painting. I was like six years old, and I was painting, I mean, really, then my mom sent me to a neighbor who was a paint, an artist, and she taught me more, but really complicated, gorgeous paintings. Actually, I remember there was a teacher in school, grade four teacher, who was very different from everybody. She was very artitzy and took a liking to me, and she was like, You're gonna be a great artist, but guess what? I let it go, and then I became an adult, and I can't draw the way I used to, cannot. And I've seen some of these oil paintings I made, and I was like, how the fuck did I do that at seven, eight years ago? I I used to play much better piano at that young age than I did in my drinking years. So you're right, there's a way to tap into that creativity that has nothing to do with alcohol. And as we've talked about before, my jazz pianist teacher always said, he's like, Isabel, I've seen some guys play gorgeous jazz strung out on heron. Don't recommend it because that came with a lot of different things. But he's like, I've never seen the best jazz player drunk play well. They play sloppy, sloppy, sloppy. It's really sloppy. It's not, you know, you think, and I've I've like I've taped myself playing piano when I was still playing jazz, a little drunk. And that's one of the things. I remember when I re-kindled playing piano. I played for 20 years, quit for 10, got back into it for 15. And I remember telling my mom, I'll finally drink less because I have to practice. Right. I was just practicing with fucking glass of wine on the piano. And I had to tape myself or the teacher anyway, whatever, to make exercise. And after a glass or two, I thought I sounded great. But when I would be listening to the next day, it was sloppy.

SPEAKER_01 24:51

So I think I've mentioned this before too. As a singer, um, you you you can't sing well drunk. I can't imagine. Uh it's, I mean, aside from you know, forgetting the lyrics, doesn't it? Completely it constricts your vocal cords, it makes everything tight. It's like absolutely no no. So, from from a working standpoint, I would never ever drink before a show. In fact, for days before performance, I wouldn't drink alcohol. But there would be moments where in um, you know, actually almost exclusively in a karaoke setting, right? Where it's not work, right? It's fun, but I've been out and someone's like, oh, please sing, you'd be such a ringer, like get up and sing it, and uh could sing something, and I would I would be drunk. Right. And then if someone videoed me and I would see myself singing the next.

SPEAKER_02 25:43

What do you think?

SPEAKER_00 25:45

It was not like the way you can sing, right? Oh my god, oh that's so pitchy. I'm so off, oh god, so terrible. Well, it's like the knitting, remember? I said the I'm oh and then dropping, and then the next day I look and everything's crooked. I have to frog the whole fucking thing.

SPEAKER_01 26:02

No, and it's exactly right. I, you know, I understand what what this topic was about freeing your brain to be creative, but we have to do it in a way that that goes to the root of the issue versus putting a band-aid uh on it. I I I had told you the story about me too, writing lyrics at night and thinking, oh my God, I'm drunk on an airplane. I'm like, I've just written the most amazing song. And then I would find those notes like a week later, and I'm like, what is that?

SPEAKER_00 26:34

I feel as though it's the only substance I can think of that when you decide to quit it, because there's a lot of reason one would want to quit it. Not society, because that sounds like we're victims, but somebody, loads of people are trying to convince you that it was a bad idea to quit it. I don't see that on social media that's a bad idea to quit coke, bad idea to quit heroin, bad idea even to quit weed. They don't say quit weed, they don't say it's about if someone quits weed, they're like, that's great. Same with cigarettes, that's great. But if you quit alcohol, a lot of people are gonna congratulate you, but there's still a huge marketing machine.

SPEAKER_01 27:14

They're like, are you sure? There's also all the people, and it's true, it had there has to be a counter-argument for everything. So now that the alcohol-free voice is being um amplified, uh, now that that all of these companies are creating these alternatives, there has to be a backlash, right? Because as we've said a million times, we're going against societal norms by making this choice. So there has to be people who are going to stand up and say, oh, for fuck's sake, shut up. What's what's the harm in a glass of wine? And it's like, well, it it depends. There's a very big gray area about what about whether or not a glass of wine is fine. And if a glass of wine is fine for you, then have your glass of wine. We're not telling you not to have it, but there are many people who cannot have one glass of wine. And then there are many people who now know that it was a lie that one glass of wine is good for you.

SPEAKER_00 28:15

Thank you. So I was just exactly to say that. So have your bloody glass of wine, absolutely, but don't dilute yourself in thinking that it is good for you. Yeah. Because that's just a fucking lie. Yes. Same as they used to tell women that were pregnant to smoke cigarettes before uh before they were gonna deliver because it would make for an easier delivery. It wasn't true. Yes. Okay, so that's exactly what we're doing.

SPEAKER_01 28:40

And that's the thing, we're at that place now where we have the information that my parents didn't have. Like that generation before us didn't have this, the information that we have. And and one of the clips from our one of our previous podcasts that was the most um controversial, or the one that was at what's certainly the most viewed, was when I said someone had come at me saying, Oh, for fuck's sake, I my whiskey at the end of the day is part of the ritual. And if it's gonna cost me a a a couple of years at the end of my life in my 90s, then that's the price I'm willing to pay. And I said, bingo, you've nailed it. You are willing to pay the price. I am not. I'm not willing to give up one single day of my life.

SPEAKER_00 29:32

And not only that, is that the price? Are you sure that's really the price? You're rolling. Is it really the price? And I remember when I quit smoking cigarettes, you know, quitting so cigarettes was traumatic for me. It was really, really hard. And actually, you know, I just discovered Brene Brown. Okay, I'm a loser. I know I'm not plugged in. I'm like a 95-year-old grandmother and a 54-year-old grandma. Is me, darling? I would like you to know that that is not a bad thing. Okay. Not being plugged in. So I just realized who she is. So I listened to a few podcasts, and I didn't know she quits drinking 30 years ago. And she she said she quits, she was an avid smoker like me, and she still thinks about it every day. Now I don't think about it every day, and I was a two-pack a day. Um, but I forget what I was gonna say about that. What am I talking about, Brittany Brown and smoking?

SPEAKER_01 30:20

Um about oh god, I love us, and we're not drunk.

SPEAKER_00 30:25

Cheers, have another mock down the book. Anyway, I don't know. The number of mouth, like I was like, I went, my mind just like, you know. Um, anywho, so then we'll talk about where we're supposed to be. No, no, no, so now I have another segue.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

Summer. And now I have another, before we get to summer, before we get to 4th of July, is one of the things our amazing video editor, Andrew W, because we've got Andrew Coss, who's our sound editor, Andrew K. We're a teeny tiny but mighty team. Anyway, Andrew Walker had just said this morning when he we were setting up, um, he said, I love what, and he's he's got the most lovely southern droll. Right, because he's from South Carolina. South, South Carolina. And he's like, I love what y'all, I can't do it. I can't do a southern accent, but I love what y'all are doing here because you're you're even speaking to me, and he doesn't drink by choice. Right. He doesn't drink by choice, and I love what he said about it. He he was like, not because I ever had a problem, but because uh I got shit to do. Right. That's what he said. He was like, I got shit to do, and I don't like how it makes me feel. Right. And and when people ask me often, like, what's your favorite uh side effect? What's the favorite um uh result that you have seen different in your life from from not drinking in the last couple of years? And my answer is the rise in my productivity is right astronomical. It is astronomical. And I wasn't a slouch before, but but I have more energy, I have more focus, I have more it's I mean, that's that's it. But okay, let's let's get to what we're gonna talk about. What were we gonna talk about? Why are we here? No, we're talking about 4th of July. It's about 4th of July.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

For me, that's like being a Canadian American now, and our Canada Day is July 1st. And French Canadians really don't care about Canada Day. It's just a fucking dude. Oh, okay. We have our own Saint Patron Saint Ben cares very much about St.

SPEAKER_01 32:24

Patrick's Day, so as did the whole world. But you know what? It's it's controversial, but saying it anyway, because we are a podcast that is totally honest. We're not owned by anybody. Okay. Um what is it she's gonna say? Is that I'm not feeling I'm not feeling very patriotic right now. As somebody who, well, first of all, I'm not American, right? I'm Irish. You are what aren't you?

SPEAKER_00 32:46

Don't you have an American citizenship? I I do, but doesn't make me American. I'm Irish. I would never do that. I'm not American, I've been here 30 years. I'm Canadian American.

SPEAKER_01 32:54

If somebody walked up to you in the street, you would not say, Hey, I'm American. I said you were mutt. I'm a mutt. You wouldn't say you were Canadian. I say I'm French Canadian. Exactly. So thank you for making it. But I'm also a little bit American. I look, I adore America. I grew up my entire life. After being here for the first time at 12 years old, I made the commitment to myself. I was like, I'm gonna live there someday because I loved the idea of America as one of my favorite um musicians of all time and great lyricist and humanitarian. I'd like to call him my friend, Bono. Uh he said the idea of America is one of the greatest ideas humanity has ever had. Yes. The idea of give me, you're poor, you're tired, you're hungry, be this a place of refuge, be this the place that you can be, whatever the fuck you want to be. The the Irish girl that wanted to break out of of the norm and of of the parochial little setup that that uh perhaps I was expected to live within, America was this big, beautiful uh dream, a place that I was gonna go to when I grew up to be an actress, to be a singer. Um, you know, uh before I went to law school. But it that that that ideology appealed to me so much. And now, after this second admin time of this administration, I I it's being ruined for me.

SPEAKER_00 34:29

It's being ruined. Hold on, the idea, the ideology is still there. Unfortunately, we're the country has decided to take a break from it, but the ideology is still there. It is, and I think July 4th doesn't celebrate the administration, it doesn't it celebrates that ideology. Correct. And so while I don't want to wear like I never would have starts and states, I'd like to say so. I am not a fan of this administration either. Uh, but a lot of our fellow citizens feel the same way we do. Even people that might have voted for this administration are starting to be like, wait a minute, that's not what America is about. And I celebrate all these people that still believe in the dream, that still believe that we're an Asian of Emirate, and still believe that you can make it here. And and I think this administration doesn't get it and they're gonna be gone soon. So I still celebrate Americans for what their image and what they they are. Yeah. And keep in mind that they a lot of people were sold a bill of good that is not true. So when they voted for a way or another, they thought they were voting one way, and are they like that's well, I mean, it remains to be seen, and I gosh darn love your optimism.

SPEAKER_01 35:46

I'm very optimistic. You are, and so am I. You know this about me. In fact, I get mocked for being too optimistic about things and not being realistic enough. And but I'm like, I would much rather be the optimist uh than a pessimist. And you know, the fact that said said president's name will not go on the Kennedy Center is one of those things for me as an artist who has spoken to people at length in recent years about the Kennedy Center and the importance of of that cultural institution not being politicized, right? Um, and that his name's gotta come down. That gave me that gave me joy. Right. And gave me hope again. Um, but I decided to wear my Red Sox cap today because when I moved to America, I knew nothing about baseball. I knew that I had to be a Red Sox fan because of my ancestry. So all of my all of my relatives on my mother's side who moved to America um generations before me were all Red Sox fans. So when we went as children, they they we went to Boston and they gave us all this stuff. And and I lived for many years in New York City. That's our Sean was not fun.

SPEAKER_00 37:04

I can't imagine. Like I mean, you will be discriminated against.

SPEAKER_01 37:07

Oh, very, very much so. Very much so. But I wear this with pride. Um, and it's it's it's a symbol to me of of America, right? Baseball and a and a baseball game. And when I have sung the American national anthem at Fenway or at City Field or any of these places, I consider that one of the greatest moments of my performance career to be able to sing about the land of the free and the home of the brave while wearing my American baseball cap and feeling the power of the ideology behind America. So it is there. And I don't want to get lost.

SPEAKER_00 37:45

And by the way, I want to remind you, I want you to not lose your hope. I want to remind you, we're a young country. Canada is a young country, America is a young country. It's old continent. There's people before us. I get it. But yeah, you I think you all know where I'm going with that. Um, all the countries that were much older than ours, like in Europe, I've all gone through their trial and tribulations with going through our own trial and tribulation, and we will go on the other side of it. Don't get me started on colonization. You know what I'm saying? Right. So you know, it's one of those we're getting our bumps, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

And we're gonna try to 4th of July. Yes, here's the reason we're talking about it, and boy, do we know how to get off track. Um it's so funny when we were having our our team meeting last week, and everyone's like, well, and then there's the roadmap, and Isabella's like, Yes, then there's the roadmap, and then we go, yeah, that's right. Let's talk about something completely different. But here's some interesting statistics about the 4th of July, which I did know this. Did you know that it's the biggest drinking day in America? Yeah. Yes, okay, you did know that. I I wasn't sure. If somebody had asked me to guess, I would have said different other possible ones. Um but here's the thing that's really freaking scary about 4th of July is um uh the ER rooms, the emergency rooms, uh are busier than any other weekend of the year. Because people do stupid shit while they're drinking. Yeah, yeah. So this the the downside of the social lubricant argument is um the National Safety Council reports that during the Independence Day period, 38% of all traffic fatalities uh involve an alcohol-impaired driver. Um and 4th and 5th of July have the highest injury-related ER visits of any other day in the US. Uh, more than 45,000 people visit emergency rooms on those days.

SPEAKER_00 39:54

By the way, I can't remember if I mentioned this on this podcast or not, but it doesn't matter. Norway took care of that. Oh, you did? We did. We talked about that. Like where you're not allowed to drive. And even when I was drinking, I used to think we should be stricter about because I was this hypocrite. I was such a fucking hypocrite. Because I never drank, I mean, very seldom drank and drove. If I did, it would have been for three miles and I wasn't slushed, right? I would be above the limit, but not like, you know, so I would always be like, I'm not driving, right? Like I would always announce. So who do you think would drive? Fucking Brooks, who was probably just as slush as I was. Do you know how many times we're like, we're both like it's like we have two pairs of eyes that he's going really slow? And what an asshole. I'm making him drive so that I'm not drinking and driving, right? Like if anyone's getting caught, right? That's it. And I I'm the one going, like, oh, that's another one. Listen, I'm not driving. Yeah. Oh my God. Do you know how many times I've done that? I make other people drive drunk so that I didn't drive drunk so that I can't go around in the world saying, Which wouldn't matter if you're driving if you wrap yourself around a bull.

SPEAKER_01 41:06

Right. But it's not just that was the crazy thing. It's not just about driving. Oh, falls and head injuries, broken bones, drownings, um, grill accidents, firework accidents, and a funny story. Alcohol poisoning. So it's not just getting behind the wheel, it's all of the possible disastrous things that can happen on that weekend because that's the weekend that's every everyone is saying we gotta drink our faces off.

SPEAKER_00 41:34

Do you want to know the fireworks slash grilling accident that I've heard of that is so dumb that it's funny and sad at the same time? Go for it. So involves both grills and skiing. Yes. So this, so I'm at a bar years ago in Truckee, California with gun skiing in Lake Tahoe. Okay. And Bruce and I are sitting at the bar having a couple of cocktails and eating our dinner, and there's a gentleman that sits next to us, so we start striking conversation, and he happens to be the town's doctor, right? So I'm like, wow, that's gotta be the best gig in the universe. Like, you know, you get broken bones, like you're not getting like, I'm thinking, you know, I'm romanticizing this place. I'm like, you're not getting the overdose, you're not getting like the sh gunshots, right? So it's like all fun, fun injuries, ski injuries. He's like, no, you're right. But he's like, sometimes you get the dumb ass injury that's pretty bad. I'm like, do tell. So he tells me that this guy, 4th of July, I drank too much, grilling, and he decides that he's gonna put out fireworks for his kids. So he lights the firework, but he's holding it in his mouth, and it fucking blew early. Oh he blew his fucking jaw off. No, oh my gosh, why did you tell that story? I think it's sad, but so fucking funny. How stupid, how fucking drunk and stupid you have to be? Yeah, he blew his fucking jaw off. Even the doctor was like chuggling. He's like, I know I shouldn't chuggle, but he's like, Man, have you ever seen? I couldn't believe it. Yeah. So, hey kids, don't do that. So this guy had been drinking and he was grilling. So now I need to know though, did they reconstruct his jaw? Was he okay? I didn't even bother. We were like, you know, drinking, so we're laughing. No, I don't think he died. Wait, bruised. You don't think he did? No, I don't think he did. Like I didn't mention any death. That's a crazy story.

SPEAKER_01 43:30

You know what? Actually, I have I have two Fourth of July injuries, and neither one of them involved alcohol. Oh, you know, there's two sides to every story. Yeah. And I know that that people will be like, well, plenty of people get injured without drinking. Of course, of course, that is true. And actually, Fourth of July, Andrew's probably gonna be like, oh gosh, I remember both of those. Um We always have a pool party. Right. And the first accident happened maybe, maybe like seven or eight years ago. The pool party had just started. Many of the friends hadn't arrived yet. And once people arrive, I'm get busy getting things ready for cookout and barbecuing and all of that. And I thought, oh, not everybody, people aren't here yet. Most guests aren't here yet. I'm gonna jump in the pool with the kids myself for half an hour before it gets too busy. And I I took off my cover up and I wasn't looking where I was going and I tripped and fell on and landed on an umbrella stand. Ouch. That didn't have the umbrella in it.

SPEAKER_00 44:35

Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch. So you know the cylinder sticking in it.

SPEAKER_01 44:38

And it's really sharp.

unknown 44:40

Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_01 44:41

Not anymore. All of my umbrella stands in this house now have a rubber insert. Yeah, but this one was sharp. This this one was sharp. So I cut straight into my shin and I thought, ooh, and I went, wow. And and my one of my friends is in the pool, and one of my friends is walking down the grass, and I was just I just put my hand on it and I was like, I've cut myself. And I said, I'm not sure if I need a band-aid or I need a bigger plastic surgery. So, and I'm I'm not good with blood or anything like that. So I had to ask my friend as she was walking down, she was like, What are you doing? And she sees the blood pouring down my leg. And I was like, I'm gonna lift my hand and you're gonna tell me band-aid or hospital. And I lifted my hand and she went, get thee to a hospital. Oh no. She could see my shin bone. Like I had cut that deeply. Anyway, uh, went, got stitches, whatever. I have the scar to tell the tale. Not a single drop of alcohol had been consumed. Um, and and I was, I think, the first in the ER that day. So, you know, nobody and urgent care, nobody else was there yet. Um, and then the next year, I kid you not, because Andrew was like, I think 4th of July at our house is cursed. Uh the next year, it wasn't me that got injured, it was my darling daughter, where um she was swimming and there was like it was like kid soup in the pools. There was like so many kids in the pool, and and one of my friends was throwing his son in, and they were just having fun, but didn't see Rebecca was hidden underneath um a floaty. Oh no. The timing of her coming up and the kid going in. Just perfect, head collision, Rebecca split. Like, oh my gosh. Now I'm making myself a little bit nauseous from these.

SPEAKER_00 46:27

But so I'll tell you, then my July 4th stories, they're not nauseous and they were heavily uh alcohol induced and no accidents. Oh, good. Um came close though. We just stepping on our police. Like I like to say, there's gods for imbeciles, right? We being the imbeciles. So two of the most epic July 4th took place in that little town in Friends Banyules where my in-laws used to live on the Mediterranean. So obviously, the French people there don't really know about July 4th. My-in-laws are the only American, so they tell them, hey, it's like the birthday of the United States. It's like your Bastille. So we're gonna do a party in a park. Oh, it's US T Day, yeah. So we go and that this old Land Rover, like truck from the 80s, like like, dak, dak, dak, not fancy. So we have like this big uh trailer in the back and we pack it. We're going to the town's park and we pack it with all American goodies where we're gonna make uh chicken wings, which is not a small feat to find chicken wings on the border of Spain. They don't know what that is, right? And like burgers.

SPEAKER_01 47:25

And there's no way you're finding a hot dog.

SPEAKER_00 47:27

Right. No, no, we we scratched that one. That was not gonna happen. It doesn't exist. And I had brought wigs from the United States because I have I'm a firm believer that you can't have a good party without a bunch of wigs. And even the crankiest person ends up with a fucking wing on their head before you know it. So we go to this park, we set up, and just me, Brooks, my in-laws, one year my sister came, and it's like 10 in the morning. We told the French people, come around noon, you know, and it's in a park, so there's no loo, right? There's no bathroom, there's no anything. It's a fucking municipal little park in a town of 4,000 people, okay? It's just a green space with a thing to play bull, you know, like saboti, I guess. Uh so of course, French people liking a good party, they show up at 11, like an hour early. We closed the park at one in the morning. Nobody went to the bathroom, okay? We drank, actually, people would leave, go to their house and come back with vieille prune, which is like 50-proof. It's prunes that have been macerated. Anyways, it's it's you can shine your fucking car with it, but we were drinking it, right? So we drank. I mean, I don't even know if I was drunk because I was drunk enough to not even know that I was drunk. Like it was that kind of drunk, right? And then my father-in-law is like, let's go back. My father-in-law can keep it on like a sailor. Him and I kind of like are, and it's one in the morning. We've been there since 10 in the morning drinking, right? Uh, so we packed the trailer. You should have seen the fucking trailer next day. It was pretty hysterical the way it's packed. You could tell it was like the blind leading the blind. And then we're going that old Land Rover, like the town, everything's dark, everybody's asleep. It's a tiny little town. And there's a river that runs through it, you know, like an ocean river, and it's dry that time of the year. So we all thought my my father-in-law is like, fuck the road. I don't, I know, shortcut. I'm like, oh yeah, where is like down the fucking river? I mean, we're like going back, tack, tag. The trailer almost like jumped over the land where I mean, we could have gotten killed right there and there, like down the river, up the river. But so that was my July 4th. The most epic celebration of the United States was in France. Drinking a lot and crossing dry river beds.

SPEAKER_01 49:36

Well, you know, this 4th of July, um I'm working this 4th of July. So we actually stopped having 4th of July parties because we were like, I don't want any more injuries. Right. So we have a party on like the 5th or the 6th. Um and this year I'm working, I'm singing with um a symphony. Right. And and it's the 250th, right? It's a it's a whole big celebration this year. Um, but but you know, I can now think about celebrating 4th of July or any other amazing holiday, uh, with lots of different uh alternatives. And and having that option available, uh actually Andrew Walker was talking about this too. He was like, you guys are just like we're right at the precipice of this big, big conversation, and we agree that these uh drinks are becoming more mainstream, are allowing people to uh choose not to without feeling uh left out.

SPEAKER_00 50:40

Right. So because I was thinking I was telling you, and I don't know if we're running out of time or not, but I was telling you how for me, July 4th and summer really triggers parties and travels. And that's where I think about my alcohol. And one of the things that I've done is try to think of these good times where I was drinking heavily and imagine myself, if I hadn't been drinking, would have it been as fun. And several of them, I'd say 90%, yes, it would have been as fun. There's maybe a 10% you're like, eh, but 90% would have been as fun, and and maybe better. Like, for instance, there's one where uh this there's a summer thing, and also there's a trip in Australia. So I don't know if I have time for both, but I'll start with the trip in Australia because traveling makes me think of summer. That for me, like that's like I went to Australia with my sister years ago, and uh she was there on business, so our boss was there. Her boss was really nice, great guy. And I was meeting her on our last day with our boss, and her and I were gonna do a Telma and Louise, right? We're gonna travel. Okay, so great. So I show up, and our boss kindly generously invites us for a whole day in the vineyards, and then we're gonna go to this fancy dinner. So we drink the vineyards. I mean, one of the vineyards called and said, like, this woman needs to go. Like, we're out. She drive, like, you know, we we fucking did it. So much so that, and we went to Melbourne and having more cocktails, we're supposed to get ready for dinner, and everybody's like, fuck that. And we're just staying at the beach and we scrap dinner, we stay in our like jeans and linens, and we're just gonna party it up, which we did. So we got sauced. So in my being sauced, the next day, my sister and I are leaving for a road trip. Now, this man is so nice, but he's our boss, right? Like, it's still our boss. Now, I'm in a state that you know, there's a state of drunkenness that you just love everybody so much. Yes, like you love them, like you need to be my brother. So I'm like, this gentleman, let's say his name is Jim. Jim, yeah, gotta wait, you're alone the rest of the week? No, no, no, that is not acceptable. Ev is gotta come with us. Jim, I'm not no, you're coming with us on our girl trip. No, I'm not taking no for an answer. And this goes on for a fucking half hour, right? He's like, Well, I think you got no, no, no, Jim, buddy, you can't be alone. And my sister's like, I'm fucking fucking kill her. So my sister's like, Zebel, let's go to the bathroom. So we go to the bathroom. She's like, dude, he's my boss, okay? Like, we can't go on a fucking girl trip with my boss. Come on. So I'm like, fuck. So she's like, you need to scale it back. Obviously, I don't, right? So then we go to the hotel, we wake up the next day. I'm one of those top five hangovers is that one. And I look over at my sister, and she just looks at me like this or my skirt, like down her face. And I'm like, I'm so sorry. Like it all comes back to me. I beg this guy to travel with us, and I'm like, no, I want to be alone with my sister. So she's like, dude, you need to fix this. And I'm like, okay. So we go to breakfast, we're having breakfast, and he comes down the staircases, and I'm like, I really need to go to the bathroom. And I took off and I left her. I fucking left her to fix it. She was like, I fucking hate you. She did. She's like, Listen, my sister really likes you, but you know, I really want to be alone. He understood completely. Like, he was like, Listen, I wasn't gonna go, but like, you know, I like not been drinking so heavily, like the feeling of like having to take back something that's already in the universe, and now you're really fucked up. And now you have to go drive for four hours on the wrong side of the road with the worst hangover of your life. That's a whole different podcast. Okay, like that was a whole different podcast. Yeah, but like this, I remember. So when I was doing my exercise of would the situation have been more fun had I not been drinking, this is one of those that yes, would have been more fun. It would have been. It would have been more fun. Yeah, had I not been drinking.

SPEAKER_01 54:34

I don't have I don't have many. I would have to really think about it. Uh, of because of because of the taking it too far, it might have started out fun. For me, the reverse is true. There are way more situations that that could have been really bad because of drinking. Right. And and I'm just fucking lucky. That it didn't go south. Lucky. Right. That I didn't die. Like nothing. You're not putting yourself in stupid situations. Like the subway up to the situation. Getting in a cab, doing these things, going to a house party, going a you know, back with some guys that it like so so many things. So those, those for me, anytime I think about um the the oh, would it be more fun with with alcohol? I'm like, no, no. Right. No, right, I don't. And and you know, to to tie us up for Fourth of July, when you think about all of these parties now, you are the queen of being prepared with your alternatives. And that's like that's just the way now. Absolutely. It's it's wherever you go. I went to a benefit the other night, and actually at a woman's house, a fundraiser, um, and she is also alcohol, both her and her husband do not drink, not because they had addiction issues, they just don't drink for health reasons. And they have this amazing selection of of uh dealized wine, and there's just more and more of it. So, you know, our message to our listeners, again, just in case anybody thinks we're trying to tell them what to do. Oh god, no. We are not. We're not we're not self-help gurus, we're not psychiatrists, we're not, we're not addiction coaches. Um, we're just telling you how we did it. And for me, like sharing the sharing the the fact that going out to a party in the summer, like a Fourth of July cookout and bringing your own delicious bottle of alcohol-free champagne or a little four-pack of of blind tiger, I now I don't even think about the wine or the rose in it.

SPEAKER_00 56:49

Because I think they mismarketed it, and I need I know we need to go. They're saying that the alcohol is the social glue. It's not the alcohol, it's because you have you're it's like eating, you know, you sit, you eat, that's the social glue. Yes, you're walking around with something in your hand, you're drinking together. Yes, that's a social glue. So if you're drinking in a whatever, you have the so actually a better social glue because you're not gonna say something stupid. Right. Like my friend went over someone else the other day at a cocktail. She's like, oh my god, congratulations. The person's not pregnant. Oh gosh. Right. She had been having a couple of cocktails in her. I mean, that's just not smart. No, but with a couple of cocktails, you're just gonna be able to do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not so smart anymore. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 57:29

Oh my gosh. Trust me, trust me, trust me. And we're killing the brain cells with every with every glass. But um, yeah, I I just love I love our alternatives. I'm very excited about Fourth of July this year and summer and and all of the things. And um keep listening, uh, sending in your questions because we we do we do love our questions. Um, we love answering them, and we're gonna do that in the next in the next episode. And have an amazing Fourth of July. Uh, we'll go back to this camera. It's like, which where am I looking?

SPEAKER_00 58:01

And also like send us your you is there a topic you'd like to us talk about? Because I think there's a lot of topics within us that we don't even think of right, right.

SPEAKER_01 58:10

Thank you to the service. But and I love that so because some of those questions that get sent in up uh open up a lot of conversation points, right? Um, we are so grateful for uh that you're listening and keep listening, keep sending us your questions, um, share us with other people. If you see us on social media, follow us. We're happyaf podcast.com, which is our sort of central landing point for everything. And and we're growing. You know, again, we were talking with the Andrews about this before we started filming. Like we're growing. We jumped into this um blind. Uh two people who'd never done a podcast before, and here we are. And and and with every episode, I feel like we're we're getting a little bit better and we're we're we're figuring out um how to do things uh in a little more polished way. Uh, although I don't know we'll ever be polished based on who we are. But there we go. Uh keep listening. Go on to happyafpodcast.com, find us on Instagram, on TikTok, we're on all the places, and share us and come back and listen in for the next episode. Thanks for listening. I'm Maxine.

SPEAKER_00 59:16

I'm happy, alcohol free. And I'm Isabel and happy birthday, America. You're gonna be 250 this year. Well done. Well done. You you look you don't look a day over 149. Uh, and I'm happy as fuck.

SPEAKER_01 59:29

See you soon.

SPEAKER_02 59:37

Just wanna be happy. Wanna be happy and happy and free.