Hot Girls Talk Hormones ft. Menopause Expert Sheila Milan

This week on The Taylor Taylor Taylor Show, Taylor sits down with menopause expert Sheila Milan for a conversation every woman needs to hear but no one has been having.

From understanding the difference between perimenopause and menopause to unpacking why so many women say “I just don’t feel like myself,” this episode dives into the hormonal, emotional, and cultural realities of this stage of life.

Why has menopause been treated like a secret for so long? Why were generations of women taught to stay quiet about their bodies? And what happens when we finally start talking about it out loud?

Sheila breaks down what is actually happening in the body during perimenopause, the early signs most women miss, and why this phase has been misunderstood for decades. Together, she and Taylor challenge outdated narratives around aging, femininity, and identity while creating space for women to feel informed, validated, and empowered.

If you have ever felt off, overwhelmed, or like your body is shifting in ways you cannot explain, this episode will give you clarity.

This is your guide to understanding menopause, hormone changes, women’s health, and stepping into your next chapter with confidence.

💚 Support the Pod: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2550540/support
📧 Email Sheila Milan: PausingIt2025@gmail.com 

🎙️ Recorded at: https://westchesterstudios.co/

📲 Follow along / stalk politely: https://linktree.com/taylortaylortaylor / https://www.tiktok.com/@sheilamenopausemom

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:19

All content featured on the Taylor Taylor Taylor show is intended for entertainment purposes only. All stories discussed herein are based on alleged events and personal opinions. Nothing shared should be taken as bagged with professional advice. Many viewpoints expressed are solely those opposed and do not represent any business or organizations.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

Hello, hello, hello, and welcome back to the Taylor Taylor Taylor Show, the show where we say everything three times until it makes sense. And today we're gonna be doing a lot of that. We're gonna be saying things three times, four times, five times until they make sense. And I'm so excited for today's guest. We have Sheila Milan here, and she is a menopause expert. She is the owner of Pause It, and we're gonna talk today about menopause, obviously. And it seems like it's like such a well-kept secret. Like we don't talk about this. Women don't have these open conversations. So that's what we're having right here today. Give it up for my friend Sheila. Hi. Hey, hi, thank you. Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it. Coming on. Oh my gosh. This is going to be one of those eye-opening conversations. I think so, especially for you because you're not even in that space yet.

SPEAKER_02 1:27

You're not thinking about it. It's not, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:30

Yeah, but now I am. Now I'm like consistently thinking about it. So a little background for my listeners. Um, you guys all know I went to an all-girls high school. Like I've always been very like female focused and female empowered. I had no idea how big menopause was going to be in my life until I started talking to my mom, friends. I joined a menopause workout class because I was like, I just like get motivated and like get ready for this phase of life, but I didn't know anything about it. So I want to change that stigma. I want my listeners, my little gremlins to come out of this conversation feeling empowered and like they have information and not they're scared of this like random thing that we're saying menopause and it's like so scary.

SPEAKER_02 2:12

So yeah, and it it is scary, and I think it's scary because I know it was scary for me. I never heard, well, I knew what menopause was, but I didn't know what perimenopause was. So I want to start there.

SPEAKER_03 2:25

Yeah, let's start there.

SPEAKER_02 2:26

Because perimenopause are all the years of changes and hormonal fluctuations and things that are happening to our body leading up to menopause. Menopause is one day.

SPEAKER_03 2:38

It's one day.

SPEAKER_02 2:39

It's one day. It's when you have reached that time in your life where you have not had a period for 12 consecutive months. Wow. That's your menopause, then your postmenopause. Wow. So anything leading up to that is per is considered perimenopause. Okay. And so I talk to my girlfriends, people in my circles, and we talk, we had not heard about perimenopause probably until the last like five years. Had no idea what it was, that it was a thing. And I I now that there's social media and there are a lot more doctors out there, and everybody's got their their thing that they're talking about as far as hormones, no hormones, whatever, um, we're starting to hear more about it. But yeah, perimenopause is the thing that we need to start thinking about earlier.

SPEAKER_03 3:29

So menopause is only one day. One day. That is so that's such a powerful statement to even begin with. Because coming into this conversation, I thought it was like years. So the years before, that's perimenopause. Years before is perimenopause. How do you know when you're going through perimenopause?

SPEAKER_02 3:46

So that's a lot of what we're gonna talk about today. Okay, yeah. That is a lot of what we're gonna talk about today. All those early signs and symptoms, and you know, just the the biggest thing is, and I think it's now characterized as um something that doctors are looking to listen for, is when a woman comes in and says, I just don't feel like myself.

SPEAKER_03 4:06

I just don't feel like myself.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 4:08

Wow. So let's start here. Why do you think menopause is such a silent, scary topic? Like, why do you think we stray away from talking about this?

SPEAKER_02 4:20

I don't know because I think men still have such an influence over what is talked about, and they think that everything that has to do with women and their bodies on a in a cycle are is gross and we don't want to talk about it, we don't want to hear about it, you know, keep it quiet. Um but I think the other thing is it's changing.

SPEAKER_04 4:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:45

But our grandmothers, our mothers, our grandmothers, our great grandmothers, they were always just probably told it's part of aging, this is this is how you're gonna feel when you get old. Yep. Um, I know that in research and reading that I've done in like the super, you know, old, olden day medical books, when women go through that change, they're characterized as crazy. They are characterized as no longer women, they're characterized as no longer beautiful. Oh my god. Like on beyond childbearing years in you know, old timey days, you're done.

SPEAKER_03 5:24

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 5:25

You're no longer relevant.

SPEAKER_03 5:27

So you're just discarded as a woman because you can't pretty much carry children anymore. You're not a society. So why?

SPEAKER_02 5:33

I I think in medicine, yeah, but in you know, in traditional life, we rely on grandmothers. Yeah. We rely on grandmothers to help raise our children. We rely on grandmothers to be that fun source of education for our kids. Um I don't know. It's it it shouldn't be taboo. I think it's that sh that wave is changing. It's we're moving into a different era, especially with social media.

SPEAKER_03 6:03

Yeah. And you're helping move us into that era. I'm sure. You're the first person that I've come across locally, nationally, internationally, and like I know a lot of people, I'm a lot of places that has been so open about this topic. And like when we jumped on a call just to break the fourth wall, like after our first conversation, I was like, Sheila's my friend. And like I'm going to be calling her with any like ailments I have, or if I feel like I'm being crazy, and like when I go into this stage of life, like I feel like you're crafting this to be okay, I'm your menopause bestie. Yeah. I'm your menopause mom. I'm the girl that you can talk to.

SPEAKER_02 6:41

Yeah. I want to be that person that people can call and talk to. And and you know, when I first started doing this, it was purely selfish. I was trying to figure out things for myself. But then I'm like, if I'm feeling this way, other people must be feeling this way.

SPEAKER_03 6:57

Totally. And you have a daughter, right?

SPEAKER_02 6:59

I have a daughter.

SPEAKER_03 7:00

So you you're doing this a lot for your daughter, too.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

I see. Absolutely. Absolutely. And she's looking at me, and she I know I know she knows she's like, Oh, I get everything from you, mom. So yeah, thanks a lot.

SPEAKER_03 7:10

But yeah, that's how I've done with my mom with my periods. I'm like, I have the worst periods ever, and this is your fault, Mom. Yeah, this is all your fault.

SPEAKER_02 7:16

Right. Yeah. But I think education and having a little bit of background going into it helps a lot too.

SPEAKER_04 7:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:24

So I didn't know. I had no idea. So when we start talking about, you know, get deeper into the conversation about perimenopause symptoms and when they can start and and what they start with, when you know that there's a chance that this is what it is, it's kind of like, okay, I'm I'm not crazy. Right. There's nothing wrong with me. This is something that I'm gonna get through, just like PMS, just like postpartum, just like all the things that women go through, we'll get through it. It's just a matter of knowing what to expect.

SPEAKER_03 7:59

Is this, and this is a personal question, but do you, in your experience, has menopause, perimenopause been worse than postpartum, than PMS, than those things?

SPEAKER_02 8:10

Um I think it's gonna be different for everybody. Sure. So very, very personally, I don't remember having super bad PMS. Okay. I did have a pretty bad postpartum.

SPEAKER_03 8:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 8:24

And I can think back to then, like how much those hormonal fluctuations affected me mentally. And so it's really no surprise that now once I've entered perimenopause and I'm getting closer to menopause, that those hormonal fluctuations affected me that the way that they did.

SPEAKER_03 8:43

Wow. Yeah, I think that's powerful to hear too, because not a lot of people talk about postpartum as well. Like it's becoming more and more present. Like in reality TV and shows I watch, you'll hear women mention it, but not to the extent of you know, X amount of women do go through this. Right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:59

Right. And I wish that a doctor had said to me, like, it looks like you're struggling. It looks like you could use some help, and no one ever did.

SPEAKER_03 9:09

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

Yeah, I'm gonna get like all no, I know.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

It's like it's no, it's heartbreaking.

SPEAKER_02 9:14

It is heartbreaking. It's heartbreaking, and women swallow it all, and we're afraid to talk about it because we're supposed to be strong and it's embarrassing, and you know, I feel weak. I feel like something's wrong with me. Yeah, and there isn't anything wrong.

SPEAKER_03 9:27

No, yeah. That's that's what I want everyone to take out of this. They don't take anything else out of this interview. It's that there's nothing wrong with you. One thousand percent. Let's get into the peri where was it, mery menopause? The perimenopause.

SPEAKER_02 9:42

I wish it was Mary.

SPEAKER_03 9:43

Yeah, right. The perimenopause of it all. What age should women look towards, or like, is there a certain marker where, like, okay, maybe this is something that I could consider that is affecting how I feel? When is that like a possibility? Okay.

SPEAKER_02 9:59

So hold on. Okay, strap in. Can happen in your mid-30s. Whoa. Okay. Early 40s. It's gonna be different for everyone. Um I know for me it was early 40s, okay, and I'm 56 now, and I'm not officially menopausal, so I haven't hit that one day.

SPEAKER_03 10:22

You look amazing, by the way, I just want to say.

unknown 10:24

Thanks.

SPEAKER_02 10:25

Um, so I'm still technically in perimenopause. Okay. I would say probably the last five or six years have been the most up and down, but I've also handled it better because I knew what it was. In my early 40s, I had no idea what was going on with me, and I felt all those things. I'm crazy. What's wrong with me? There's no reason for me to feel this way. And then some of the other symptoms that were happening, I'd go to doctor after doctor after doctor, and no one ever mentioned perimenopause to me. Wow.

SPEAKER_03 11:00

What what did they say? It's just anxiety.

SPEAKER_02 11:03

Um, so I I'm gonna say one of my earliest things was skin changes. I started getting psoriasis on my elbows, down my arms. I'd never had skin issues ever in my life. And so I thought, am I all of a sudden allergic to something? What's happening with me? Went to a dermatologist, we did all the testing. Oh, you're allergic to this, this, and this. Well, I eat those things every single day. How can I be allergic to it?

SPEAKER_04 11:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:32

And those skin rashes went away almost as fast as they came on. But they lasted I want to say for a good period of time. You're asking me to ask, think 16 years back. But they they lasted for a while. Wow. And they still tend to come and go. But I really think that they were hormonally related.

SPEAKER_04 11:52

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 11:54

And then early other early symptoms are just all of a sudden having anxiety that you've never had before, being worried about things that you never worried about before, having irrational thoughts that you never had before. Wow. I one of my sisters and I, if I have two sisters, one of my sisters and I both have a similar anxiety about driving. And I went through a period of time where I couldn't drive over bridges. Wow.

SPEAKER_04 12:22

Yeah, that's extreme.

SPEAKER_02 12:24

I had a I had been starting to feel a little anxious about driving over bridges and even riding in the car going over bridges, and I wasn't really sure like where this was coming from, and I kept, you know, pushing it down and saying, This is stupid, like nothing's gonna happen. And I was driving my daughter to a swim meet, and we were going over the Delaware Bay Bridge, the four-mile bridge, the really super high one. Yeah, and all of a sudden I was white knuckling, I was like tunnel vision. I had been trying to watch the truck in front of me because I started to feel panicky. Yeah, and all of a sudden the truck was gone, and I was trying to listen to the music, and then I couldn't hear the music anymore.

SPEAKER_04 13:06

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 13:06

And had my daughter not been in the car with me, I probably would have stopped in the middle of the bridge and asked for somebody else to drive me.

SPEAKER_04 13:13

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 13:14

And that came out of nowhere, and then for years I couldn't drive over bridges.

SPEAKER_04 13:20

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 13:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:21

And now it's gone. Just as quick as it came on. Now it's gone. That and did you talk to a doctor about that when that happened? I didn't. Because you wouldn't think to bring that up with a practitioner. I'm scared of bridges. Can you fix me? Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_02 13:38

And I I hear that it's you know, driving on highways, driving through tunnels, and it's this all this it's a it's a shift that happens.

unknown 13:47

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 13:48

And I I got a little validation about that's exactly what it was because I had been asked to partic participate in this research study and answer all these questions. And one of the questions was anxiety, driving over bridges, driving through tunnels, driving on highways. And I was like, wow, mother effer.

SPEAKER_03 14:06

Yeah. Something clicked. You're looking at it. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 14:08

Okay. Finally, yeah, like I can feel like, yes, that's what it was. I've been saying that it had something, I but I had no idea what it was coming from.

SPEAKER_03 14:17

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 14:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:19

So I think I might have skipped over this in the beginning, but if you want to give my listeners a little bit of background of like your occupation, like what how you got so knowledgeable on what you are talking about now?

SPEAKER_02 14:30

Yeah. So um I have been a teacher my whole life. I started out in childcare back when I was 15 years old, and that was just the path that I took. I was an elementary school teacher. After I had my kids, I took some time off, and then I became an adjunct instructor at a community college. Got it. Um what else have I done? I became a group fitness instructor for a little while, and then I took a job with a company that educated patients, and I was like, oh my God, I love this. Educating patients because I think that we would be so much healthier as a country if we had some kind of understanding of what's happening in our bodies.

SPEAKER_04 15:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:14

So then I started doing my own, it kind of turned into I needed to research for myself what was going on with my body. Um in my early 50s, I was having irregular periods. I had had blood work done, I'd had an ultrasound done, I'd had a uterine biopsy. Don't recommend. Painful is what I hear. I've um I've had three of them.

SPEAKER_03 15:41

Oh my God. And you've had a child. Because you're superwoman.

SPEAKER_02 15:45

You're superwoman, is what I'm hearing. I've had two children, but yeah. Um, so but perimenopause wasn't coming up, and there wasn't really any explanation because everything, blood work was always coming back normal. Your uterine biopsy is coming back great. There's nothing wrong with you, everything looks fine. You're just having a hormonal miscommunication.

SPEAKER_03 16:10

Yeah, like what does that mean? Okay. Yep. What does that mean? Yeah, how do I fix it? Yeah. And then there's no answer.

SPEAKER_02 16:16

So then I was offered at one point, and I think even before that conversation, I had been offered testosterone, and I'm like, wh why do I need testosterone? Really, not very much explanation given. Okay. So then time passes, and I have my first uterine biopsy, and everything's fine, but I'm having, you know, I'm my cycle is all over the place and I'm uncomfortable and I'm not sleeping, and this and that. I was offered progesterone. But nobody told me why I was taking progesterone. And I for me especially, and maybe not everybody is like this, but for me especially, I need to know the why. Yeah. I need to know you're handing me a drug, you're not really telling me what it's for. And the first thing that happened when I started taking it was I gained five pounds. Well, I'm a person who has been on a diet since she was 10 years old. I, you know, fight tooth and nail to lose a couple of pounds. I'm not gonna go on a medication that's make gonna make me gain five pounds. When you already don't feel like yourself. When I already don't feel like myself. So I started doing a lot more research and I started diving into what was going on with me. And then through that research, I came across a course to become a certified perimetopause and menopause coach. So I'm like, yeah, this sounds like it's up my alley and I'm gonna learn something. And as I did that, I'm like, I think there is a space for me somewhere to help women, to talk about this and to help women, to educate women, to lead them into this time in our lives, better prepared for what's happening or what could happen. Yeah. And not everybody goes through it the same way. I have girlfriends that say that they never felt a thing.

unknown 18:00

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 18:01

Bitches. Bitches. I love you, but I'm so jealous. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. So, and now I think your background as an educator too. I think so too. Really just propelled you into this. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 18:16

It just seemed like a natural path for me to take. And once I realized that there was so much that I didn't know, I just thought, well, I I need to start sharing this with everyone.

SPEAKER_03 18:29

Yeah. So when did you uh after taking the class and getting your certification, when did you decide to start pause it?

SPEAKER_02 18:36

Was it immediate? Pausing it was born out of yeah, I think I just I I needed something to occupy my time and something to do with all this information that I had. And so, you know, it's kind of gone through a couple of iterations, you know, as far as what I thought was going to happen. I mean, honestly, I thought women were going to be like pounding down my door, and yeah, but I think women prefer to stay at home and listen and try to get their information in the background. It's true, yeah. Um, which is unfortunate because I'm not making a you know big business of it. Right. But what I need women to understand is that hormone therapy is not a magic pill. Is it it's not magic. It's not gonna fix everything. And there's a lot that goes into it that I can help with. Yeah. But, you know, even if nobody knocks on my door, I'm gonna keep going out there and I'm gonna keep talking about it because it is important to me to help, you know, everyone, women and the people that they love them, kind of understand what's happening.

SPEAKER_03 19:43

Yeah. I see, I'm gonna get misty because I guess so. It's touches such a close part of my heart, and I feel like a lot of my listeners' hearts too, because everyone's a child of a mother. Like everybody has a mother. You have a grandmother, you have women in your life that are older than you that you really respect and you admire, and not being able to identify with what they're going through, one that just sucks because then they're alone on an island, but also the lack of education around it is just so prominent.

SPEAKER_02 20:11

Because if you see, like, you know, your mom saying or doing something irrational or having this like episode of rage, or you know, getting super weepy over nothing, being tired all the time, all those things, you're just chalking it up to, oh, she must just be getting older.

SPEAKER_03 20:28

Right. That's just such a common, oh, yeah, that's just how she is now.

SPEAKER_02 20:33

That's that's just how she is now. And it doesn't have to be that way at all.

SPEAKER_03 20:37

I love that. I love that you're saying it doesn't have to be that way. It does not have to be that way. And you talk about the rage portion. So this show is very female rage-based. And so we identify female rage here as speaking as loud as men and not apologizing for it. But it does take on a different set of uh definitions when we talk about female rage and menopause. Right. Do you want to talk a little bit about that?

SPEAKER_02 20:58

Sure. So um there are a couple of um doctors out there in the social media space that talk about perimenopause as the zone of chaos. And so what happens with your typical menstrual cycle is that your hormones are going up and down at this very predictable 28 to 30 day schedule. And when perimenopause starts, then those hormones are doing this.

SPEAKER_04 21:23

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 21:24

And your brain, can I curse? Yeah, oh yeah. Good. But your brain is saying, What the fuck?

unknown 21:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:29

Your brain is sending signals down to your ovaries saying, do all the same things that we've been doing for the past 20 years. And your hormones are saying, Nope, not so much, because you know, estrogen has left the building, progesterone has left the building. Oh, now we're back. Oh, now we're back. And everything's all over the place, and that rage, estrogen affects every single part of your body.

SPEAKER_03 21:54

Really?

SPEAKER_02 21:55

Head to toe. You have estrogen receptors in every single part of your body. And progesterone helps, has a calming effect. And when progesterone leaves the building, we're no longer calm.

SPEAKER_04 22:09

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02 22:10

We're no longer tolerating things that maybe we used to tolerate. Or we're not we're no longer handling stress the way we used to handle stress. And for many women that are going through this, they're in this time of their lives where their children are older, probably teenagers, maybe a little bit older. Now we're starting to take care of our parents. They could be, you know, in the prime of their careers, and then all of a sudden they're thinking about quitting their jobs because it's too much. Right. It's too much to take care of my kids and take care of my parents and take care of myself and take care of my husband. And we're just not handling things the way it taking care of ourselves during this period of time is like a full-time job in and of itself.

SPEAKER_03 22:55

Oh, yeah. I can only imagine. Yeah. Wow. So I have a I done some TikTok research on this. As one does she did. I I type in menopause in my little search bar, and I saw there's a couple pages. There's not a lot out there, even on TikTok, where you think I would be able to get hundreds of thousands of videos of women talking about this. It's scarce, it's few and far between. But something that I did notice that came up in the videos I saw was some women have immense brain fog, and then some women say that they're they have immense clarity, that somehow they feel like they just see everything for what it is. Can you talk a little bit about that?

SPEAKER_02 23:36

So yeah, the brain fog I definitely can relate to. I mean, the amount of times that I lose words in the middle of a sentence is crazy. Um and I and I feel it all the time, and I feel like, you know, and oh, she sounded like an idiot because she started talking and then she can't remember her words. And it's a thing. Aaron Powell, you're so articulate, by the way. Like I've not gotten that once, but I guess it's I woke up really, really stressed about it. I'm like, is this gonna be one of those days where I can't even remember the word cat? Oh my gosh. I'm just but yeah. Um so brain fog and then just not feeling really super disorganized, not being able to complete tasks. And you know, there's I've been doing a lot of reading lately because I'm wondering if it's one of my issues is this late stage, late age diagnosed ADHD because I can't keep myself focused. You know, I'll be doing one thing, and then all of a sudden it's like, oh, I need to do something else, and then I can't remember what I was doing, and it's I'm all over the place. The clarity, I would love to have the clarity. I would love to have that. Um but I have heard it. Okay. And I have heard for some women that it's after they start hormone therapy. Oh, okay. Menopausal hormone therapy. And um, I do want to talk about that just a little bit. Yeah, let's talk about that.

SPEAKER_03 24:59

So that's okay, let me get my terms right. So HRT is hormone replacement therapy.

SPEAKER_02 25:04

So that is one of the things that people are trying to cross off the list because we're not trying to replace hormones.

SPEAKER_03 25:10

Oh, okay, this is interesting.

SPEAKER_02 25:12

Yeah, we're not trying to we're not trying to replace anything. Yes, are our hormones going away? Are they dipping? Are they erratic? All those things, absolutely. But what we're trying to do is give you just enough to make you feel normal again, uh-huh, to be able to help you with your daily functions, um, so that it's not impacting your life, it's not impacting your sleep, it's not impacting your relationships, all those things. So I think the term that's getting thrown out there now and more people are shifting to is menopausal hormone therapy. Okay. So specifically for those women that during this period of our lives we are being really impacted, you know, our daily lives are being impacted. We want to kind of bring us back to a space where we can function.

unknown 25:58

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 25:58

Okay. Yeah. So we're not trying to replace it. Yeah. We're just trying to. It's the same as like, you know, if your if your hormone was or if your if your thyroid wasn't working great, you know, you'd get some kind of medication for your thyroid. Um I'm gonna forget all the other hormones that are floating around in your body, but there are lots of things. If your pituitary gland wasn't working, so if something wasn't working in your body, they'd give you something to kind of help that out, right? Give it a boost. And so I think that that's what's happening with menopausal hormone therapy.

unknown 26:30

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 26:31

So that's one method that women can go down to. I don't want to say cure. I feel like cure is such a strong word because you don't need to be cured of menopause.

SPEAKER_02 26:38

No, we don't, yeah, we don't need to be cured. Yeah. We just need a little boost.

SPEAKER_03 26:42

A little boost. Yes. So what's what are the other paths that women can go down? Say the menopause um hormone therapy isn't working. That's not for them. What else do you think?

SPEAKER_02 26:52

So if it's not working, or you're not a good candidate, which you know, that's a whole nother conversation that I think that we could have because there are a lot of people that think that they aren't candidates because there's a lot of scary information out there. Um I think that you probably are, and you just need to find the right provider. And the provider that is well versed in your situation, um, your background. So let's say you can't use metapatical hormone therapy, though. Lifestyle changes. And none of this is new, and none of this is like earth shattering. You want to work on nutrition, you want to work on your sleep, you want to work on your exercise, specifically strength training.

SPEAKER_04 27:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 27:39

Um, as I know as I've gotten older, I can no longer handle high-intensity workouts.

SPEAKER_04 27:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 27:46

Um, to the point where a few years ago, every time I was working out and my heart rate would get like above 163, I was throwing up.

SPEAKER_04 27:55

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 27:56

And I didn't know what because that that came kind of out of nowhere. Yeah, because you were doing it and I wasn't recovering like later in the day, and I'm lucky enough to be home. But l later in the day, I couldn't function.

unknown 28:09

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 28:10

I was taking naps for like two or three hours trying to recover from a workout that was supposed to be good for me.

SPEAKER_04 28:16

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 28:17

And so I have now found that just working on strength training for me for the long term is where I need to be. Interesting. Plus, I just want to be able to pick myself up off the floor if I fall. Right. Right? You know, basic things. The longevity thing. Yeah. You know, when I'm 85 years old, I want to be able to get up out of a chair by myself. I don't want any I don't want assistance. I want to still be able to move around the house. I want to still be able to walk upstairs. I want to be able to do all those things.

SPEAKER_03 28:50

Yeah. I actually ran into a woman at the airport naturally, as one does, um, last weekend. And she was 96 years old and she tapped me on my shoulder and she said, I'm so sorry. I'm 96 years old and I can't figure out how to work this damn iPhone. I'm trying, my daughter's trying to pick me up. So I'm calling her daughter and I'm like, Hey, I have your mom just you know, taking care of this woman's mother. And I said, Girl, you look great. Like I wouldn't have guessed that you were 96. How do you stay getting on a plane from Florida to Philadelphia at the Philadelphia airport? She said, movement. She said, Don't sit and just sit. She's like, I golf every week. And I was like, You golf every week? And she was like, Yeah, and I might not make all 18 holes, but I get out there and I do something. That's amazing.

SPEAKER_02 29:31

That's amazing, and that's huge. And I think social engagement too for women who are still working, find people outside of your workspace. Oh, okay. Because it's just a completely different feeling that you get when you get to talk to people who are you don't see every day all day long.

SPEAKER_04 29:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:55

You know, I am an empty nester now. And the first couple of years were great. And then it kind of I and maybe it was just perimenopause stuff settling, but I'm started to feel like really lonely at home. And my husband is a wonderful man, but I'm just kind of and then I started to feel like I was isolating myself and I didn't want to go out anymore, and I was making excuses not to go out. And I forced myself out of that, and I've joined some women's clubs, leadership things, going to luncheons, going to dinners, and it's been a really transformative thing for me.

SPEAKER_04 30:31

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 30:32

It's been really, really great for my mental health. You need to find something outside of the house, outside of your work, outside of your daily routine that's different. And the golfing every week or bowling or mahjong or whatever it might be, going and doing crafts, you've got to find a social circle.

unknown 30:50

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 30:51

And I do want to say for anyone that is going through this right now, and maybe, or maybe you know someone, it's your mom, it's or it's your friend. This is why Sheila's here. This is what she does. So if you're scared to go out, if you're nervous and you're like, I just don't think I connect with society in the way that I used to, you do virtual appointments, right?

SPEAKER_02 31:08

I would absolutely do a virtual appointment and let's talk about it and and release that stigma, release how you're feeling. And I do really think that women feel alone. They feel alone in how they're feeling. They they think that they're the only ones. Right. Um, and the other thing that I wanted to talk about too is for a lot of women, they're no longer comfortable on their own skin.

SPEAKER_03 31:31

And we had a couple questions about that. So yes, I I want to hear your thoughts.

SPEAKER_02 31:35

Yeah. Um, I know that I've talked to women who have put on 20, 30 pounds during this phase of their life, and this is the heaviest that they've ever been, barring, you know, having a baby or whatever, but they're just like, and they they're mad, they're upset about it, they're grieving the body that they had, they don't feel comfortable. Um it's probably impacting their relationships. Yeah. And it's no through no fault of their own. You know, I'm not doing anything different, and I'm going to the gym five times a week, and I'm trying this diet, and I'm trying that diet. And in my opinion, and just knowing from what I've gone through, we make it too complicated. We make it too complicated. Okay. Eat healthy food. Mediterranean diet is something that's really, really highly recommended. Oh, okay. Mediterranean diet, stay active, and that doesn't the activity doesn't have to be high intensity. Right. Can be walking. Get out there and walk and get some fresh air.

SPEAKER_05 32:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:42

Um, a few years, something that I incorporated for myself that I feel a difference when I don't do it is the first thing I do when I get up in the morning is I grab my water, not my coffee, my water, and I go outside. And it doesn't matter how stinking cold it is. If I have to bundle up and I go outside and I drink my water and I get some morning sun. Interesting. And sometimes I'm out there for five minutes, sometimes I'm out there for 15. Sometimes I find myself being and I don't take my phone. That's an important distinction. No phone. No phones. Do not take your phone with you. Just you, and just if you want to set some intentions. I I don't get too woo-woo about it because I'm not a woo-woo person. Um, I'm not great at meditating or anything like that. I just really enjoy sitting outside in the morning. There's just something that's so peaceful and um, yeah, and it helps me get through the day.

SPEAKER_03 33:38

And that I think that is like a form of meditation. My sister is a holistic doctor. Oh, okay. So she's she's all into the woo-woo shit. And we love her for it. Like, woo woo. I'm just not, you know, and not for me. Again, I I can't sit and just meditate and think about that because then I'm gonna think about all the awful things that I'm trying not to think about. And I think that's part of it though. Right. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's probably part of it. Yeah. So we'll we'll get there. Oh my gosh. I know she's she's a hard guest to book, you know. The younger sisters, they're they're busy, busy. They're busy, they're cooler than you, they're saying terms that you don't know, and you're like, hmm. I learned what mogging was the other day. Do you know what that is? What is it? Mogging? No. So mogging is like when you're flexing in front of the camera. And I that's a new term. I had no idea. Oh, I like it. I like it. She only has a permanent fixture on this podcast now, Mama. She's never going anywhere. Now, can I ask you some listener questions that we have? Absolutely. Yes, please. Okay. So I took notes, Gremlins, because you guys have been very active on socials with this topic, which I didn't expect there to be so much interest, but I think because it's anonymous, and so like we can have these open conversations. Okay. So the notes I took is so I don't forget any of these words. Okay. I've been going through menopause for three years now, and nothing has lessened up. So I think they mean perimenopause. Going through perimenopause for three years and nothing has lessened up. Does it ever for background? I've been on HRT, I've used oral patch creams, nothing seems to work.

SPEAKER_02 35:10

I wish I knew how old this person was, and I wish I knew whether and not that they were actually in perimenopause or menopause. So what I will say is she could be postmenopausal for three years.

SPEAKER_04 35:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 35:23

Um, and those symptoms sometimes start to go away after, from what I understand, five years. Okay. And then go away and you're clear and you're free and you're you're good. For other women, it lasts forever. Um, what I would say to that listener is we need to start working on some lifestyle things.

SPEAKER_03 35:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 35:47

We need to start adding in some other things. If you feel like your menopausal hormone therapy is not working for you or not working the way that you think it should be working, I mean, feel free to reach out. Let's talk about the levels. I'm not an expert, but I'm an expert enough to know you know, I could tell you what questions you should be asking your doctors and what blood work you should be asking for, those kinds of things. It's blood work and it's symptoms. It should never just be one or the other.

SPEAKER_03 36:19

Interesting.

SPEAKER_02 36:19

We've got to look at everything. Yeah. Um, because you also, you know, what if it's not perimenopause or menopause? What if it's something else?

SPEAKER_03 36:28

That's that's true. And you I guess like it's not that it's a scapegoat thing to say from a practitioner, but it can be.

SPEAKER_02 36:34

I mean, my husband has said to me, he's like, Shila, you can't blame everything on perimenopause. And I'm like, I think I can't.

SPEAKER_03 36:40

You're like, last time I checked you, you didn't have two children, and also you're not going through all of this. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 36:46

I think I can.

SPEAKER_03 36:47

Yeah, I think you can too. I I would be using it for everything. Oh my God. Okay, so what can you truly do if you can't tolerate progesterone?

SPEAKER_02 36:56

Um, so there are some other drugs out there that you can take. I'm going to forget what they are, and I'm not a provider, but you can certainly ask your provider because there are other things. It depends on what you're taking the progesterone for. So if it's mainly for sleep, then we've got to talk about reasons why you're not sleeping. But you have to dive a little bit deeper into what's your sleep hygiene like.

SPEAKER_03 37:23

Right.

SPEAKER_02 37:23

What are you doing before bed? How are you getting ready? What's your nighttime ritual? Uh-oh those kinds of things. And I know that that sounds woo-woo, but it does matter.

SPEAKER_03 37:32

That's interesting. Yeah. Okay. I didn't know that progesterone was used to help you sleep. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 37:37

I take it every single night, 200 milligrams, won't live without it. And I will say that different formulations work differently for different people. So my I had one provider that had me on compounded uh progesterone, which means that it's made in a compounding pharmacy. And not to get like too deep in the weeds on this, but the FDA approved progesterone that you get at your pharmacy, your regular pharmacy, does have something in it. I I think it, I don't know if it's made with a nut oil or a peanut oil or something like that. But there's something in that progesterone that if you are allergic to nuts, you cannot take that.

SPEAKER_03 38:19

That my sister has a nut allergy.

SPEAKER_02 38:21

So this is like very okay. So I mean, it would be important for her provider to know that. And hopefully her provider knows that those progesterones that are FDA approved. So then in that case, you would go to a compounding pharmacy, and a compounding pharmacy would make that progesterone without any of the nut contaminants in it. I'm not, I don't have a nut allergy, but I switched from compounded progesterone to the FDA approved progesterone, and I noticed a difference in my sleep. I wasn't sleeping anymore. Wow. For weeks, and I'm like, what the F is going on? Like I So I went back to my provider and I said, can we go back to the compounding pharmacy? That's out of pocket. It's not covered by your insurance. Of course it's not. Because it's women's health. Of course not. Yeah. So your progesterone that you get that's FDA approved, and you're getting that from your regular pharmacy, that's usually covered. I think I pay like five dollars for that.

SPEAKER_03 39:19

But your your compounded progesterone is not. So this leads into another listener question. Can I trust Life Med? Is it LifeMed is the is that's the compound pharmacy, right? Or am I? I think they do pellets. Okay. Um and we don't have a sponsorship with LifeMed, so you can shit talk them if you want.

SPEAKER_02 39:41

I don't want to shit talk them. I think that anybody who is in the pellet space, there there's a reason why they're in the pellet space and it's making a lot more money than traditional.

SPEAKER_03 39:52

There are pellets, if you don't mind me asking.

SPEAKER_02 39:53

Pellets are their they're the teeny tiny little and I actually I do use testosterone pellets.

SPEAKER_03 39:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 39:58

Because I was finding that every other form of testosterone that I tried was not making a difference for me at all.

SPEAKER_03 40:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 40:04

I do use testosterone pellets. They also have estrogen pellets. Okay. Um, I did not care for those. I've tested it all. I've been I've been the road test dummy for every hormone that's out there because I feel like then it gives me a little bit more that I can say about it, at least from a personal experience.

SPEAKER_03 40:23

How it impacted you, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 40:24

Um, as far as life mud goes, I don't know. I've never been to them, but I will say I think that they do pellets, I think they do injections, I know that there's a lot of people out there that are super happy with that. But what I would caveat is with those drugs, because they're not the bio-identical, like some of the other hormone therapy is, and when I say bioidentical, I mean that it's it's as close as you can get to the actual hormones that we're actually producing in our body. Wow. Um you're not getting some of the other benefits. We're starting to find that there are cardiovascular, cognitive, um, I have to look at my notes. There are a lot of other benefits to the traditional getting estrogen, estradiol, estriol, there's several different kinds. Progesterone, there's a difference between, I'm I'm gonna get so deep here that we're I'm gonna confuse people. There's a difference between progesterone and progestogens.

SPEAKER_03 41:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 41:38

And so, like when you think about the hormones that are in, let's say, in birth control pills, those are progestogens. Those are not bi body identical, they are synthetic, and they are and your hormones that you're getting in birth control pills, not that they're a bad thing, but when everybody worries about blood clots and side effects and things like that, birth control is gonna give you more of that than the very, very low dose of hormones that you're getting on hormone therapy.

SPEAKER_03 42:08

Wow. Wow, that's eye-opening.

SPEAKER_02 42:11

Yeah, you're gonna get a lot more side effects and a lot more risks on birth control.

SPEAKER_03 42:17

That's something like personally that I've thought about because I don't tolerate birth control pills very well. So I went the IUD route because less hormones and things like that, and then doing research into menopause and stuff. I'm like, am I fucked? Am I truly screwed?

SPEAKER_02 42:30

No, okay, no. There's and by the time you go through it, there'll be uh probably a hundred other options.

SPEAKER_03 42:37

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 42:38

And the one thing that I want people to recognize about, you know, all this information that's floating around out there, and then you'll have, you know, I I've had women who've said to me, Well, it's not FDA approved. This isn't FDA approved, or this isn't this, or this isn't. It takes our healthcare system anywhere between 17 and 25 years to go from a study or clinical observations or any of those things for it to actually be written into traditional medical care.

SPEAKER_03 43:08

17 years is like the minimum?

SPEAKER_02 43:10

17 like 17 to 25 years, I think is the the range.

SPEAKER_03 43:14

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 43:16

So I'm not willing to wait for 17 to 25 years for somebody to tell me that a testosterone pellet is okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 43:25

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 43:26

I'm I feel better taking one or having one. And that's that's the route that I choose because the gels, the creams, the the other things didn't work for me.

SPEAKER_04 43:38

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 43:39

Life med, I think, does injections. Okay. And they do peptide injections as well.

SPEAKER_03 43:44

What is a peptide injection?

SPEAKER_02 43:46

So, well, any of your hormones can be peptides, but then they're gonna also there they might add in things like B12. Okay. There's other ones that I think there's one that's called NAD plus. I want to talk about that. I don't know a lot about it. It but I can try.

SPEAKER_03 44:01

So we had a listener question. Um she struggled with weight gain uh going through perimenopause and her uh Botox doctor, so her um med spa, sorry it's recommended the skinny shot. So an NAD plus shot. Have you heard of this? Is this something that like some girls that go to you have experimented with or I have heard of it.

SPEAKER_02 44:23

I don't have anybody that I know that's come to me that but I do I have talked to people who have tried it and been successful with it. Okay. I don't know a lot about it. I know that there are other routes. Um, I know that there are other supplements that you can take that have NAD or NAC in them that you don't have to go to the injection route.

SPEAKER_03 44:42

That's an interesting perspective. I haven't heard that. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:45

So but I think everyone's into the skinny shot these days. Everyone's into the skinny shot. Oh, everything everybody's into anything that they can find.

SPEAKER_03 44:52

Oh, yeah. That's very true.

SPEAKER_02 44:55

Very true. That makes it easy. And you know what? I get that, but I you also want to you want to think about your health long term too. Totally. And you just need to go back to the foundational basics your nutrition, you know, taking care of yourself, strength training, getting sleep. Sleep, I protect at all costs. There isn't the sleep is the most important thing to me.

SPEAKER_03 45:21

I it's the most important thing to me too. So like that's yeah, yeah. That being jeopardized would be top of mind. Right. Especially like if, as you said, like you're you have a home, you have a husband, you have kids, you have a job, you have work, and then not sleeping on top of that, and you're expected to go through life normally. Right. Anybody would be going crazy.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

And then you're just you're just trying to take care of yourself. And if you don't get a good night's sleep, you don't feel like getting up and going to the gym in the morning. And you don't feel like getting up and making a healthy breakfast. You feel like grabbing the first thing that you see.

SPEAKER_04 45:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:54

You know, all those thought thoughts go out the window when you haven't slept well. And that also, you know, can impact our rage.

SPEAKER_03 46:02

Leads me to another question. This one is the funniest one we've gotten, and it is why do I hate my husband?

SPEAKER_02 46:11

Well, there could be a lot of reasons. There's gonna be a lot of reasons for this. There could be a lot of reasons, but yeah, it's a real thing. I mean, that meno divorce is a real thing. Really? Yeah. Meno rage, meno divorce, it's a real thing. Let's talk about it. Okay. So I think that women start to go through this transition transition, and we start saying to ourselves, enough is enough. I'm over it. I'm I'm done tolerating whatever I've been tolerating. Yeah. And you know, I'm not saying that this person's husband is a bad I mean, like I said before, my husband's wonderful. I can't stand to listen to him chew or breathe. I get that. Yeah. Get away from me. So I just I don't know, but there's something about how we just don't want to tolerate it anymore. We just we don't want to expose ourselves to anything that makes us feel uncomfortable anymore. We're done with that.

SPEAKER_03 47:09

And I feel like that's a lesson that all women can kind of take underneath their wing after this episode of you are empowered and you're an individual. Like stand up for yourself, be strong. Yeah. And not just wait until menopause to do that.

SPEAKER_02 47:24

Right. Yeah. Right. And just know that it's gonna come a lot easier in menopause, though.

SPEAKER_03 47:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:30

I do think about the Karen videos that I see in these poor women who are lashing out, and I'm like, they're going through something right now.

SPEAKER_03 47:38

That's a great perspective.

SPEAKER_02 47:39

I mean, that rage is an indication of something.

SPEAKER_03 47:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:44

Wow. I mean, unless they've just always been crazy, but yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:48

Yeah, but they've always been a little off the rocker. Um, another question we had was how can more women get support in real life? Do you ever have like meetups or would you be open to organizing anything like that?

SPEAKER_02 48:02

Yes, 1000%. Please reach out. I'm gonna knock my microphone over. Yes, let's reach out. Let's talk about it. Let's have mom's nights out, women's nights out, whatever. Let's do it. Um, I every time I'm in a social situation and women find out what I'm doing, you know, I'm pulled to a corner and there's the they ask me, they're desperate to tell their story. Yeah. And they're desperate to not feel alone. And I'm 100% behind, yes, let's do it. I love that. Yes. Yeah, girl, we're gonna throw an event.

SPEAKER_03 48:33

We're gonna throw an event. We have to. We have to. Um okay, let's see. Let me make sure I'm not missing anything. And I will take all the questions. Gremlin's you heard it here.

SPEAKER_02 48:43

She's gonna answer them for you. I'll take all the questions. I am not afraid to talk about anything. I mean, I have notes about things in here that we haven't even touched on. I mean, there is a lot.

SPEAKER_04 48:53

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 48:54

And one of the things that I personally have worked really, really hard on um over the past couple of years, and I think that this is something else that women don't talk about is urinary incontinence. Oh, and it doesn't have anything to do with how many babies you've had. That once you lose your adjust r estrogen, everything gets thinner, everything gets weaker, everything starts to get smaller, and maybe I don't want to use the word shrivel up, but it can.

SPEAKER_04 49:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 49:23

And there are things that you can do to help prevent that. There are pelvic floor exercises that you should be doing now. I'm breaking one of my cardinal rules right now, sitting here with my legs crossed, because we really shouldn't be sitting with our legs crossed. Really? It really twists up those muscles in a way that we that makes you feel tight all the time. Wow. And so I I took a really expensive course, and I'm not certified, but I do feel really comfortable in talking about all of the things that I learned. And I I came from too much information, but I came from a point in time where I had to wear a poise pad every single day, all day long, never leave the house without it, and I no longer do that.

SPEAKER_03 50:09

Wow, and you contribute that to the pelvic exercises, pelvic exercises and the things, yes, absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 50:15

And there's a couple of different types of urinary incontinence. There's the kind with the coughing, sneezing, lifting, you know, doing something strenuous strenuous, and that's called stress incontinence. And then there's also urge incontinence. So that incontinence that we get when we pull in the driveway or start to put the key in the door, and you have you go from feeling like you slightly need to go to the bathroom to I don't think I'm gonna make it to the bathroom.

SPEAKER_04 50:42

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 50:43

And that is a mental thing, and that takes a lot of behavioral health therapy, a lot of thinking through. There's a lot of talking through with that one. But um, that's something I've worked on for myself for a really long time. And so I'd be happy to talk to anybody who's going through that stuff too, because that's something that we also don't talk about, and it's right in line with perimetopause, menopause, it all goes together.

SPEAKER_03 51:08

Since we're already getting TMI, I'm gonna ask another listener question. Um, a woman asked, Why does sex hurt for me?

SPEAKER_02 51:15

She needs some vaginal estrogen.

SPEAKER_03 51:18

Vaginal estrogen.

SPEAKER_02 51:19

Yes, vaginal estrogen, and it's not you can take that on top of any estrogen patch that you're already taking, or if you're taking the estrogen pill, you can so it's localized and it helps kind of plump everything back up and strengthen everything up back there. Okay. Because, like I said, when you've lost that estrogen, everything gets thinner, everything gets weaker, things start to shrivel up a little bit. So when you start using that vaginal estrogen and you have to use it regularly, you have to do it. So it's usually the per your provider will tell you that you start out for 14 days, you use it every day. Okay, and then you use it two to three times a week as needed. You must use it two to three times a week. Trust me, I've tested it.

SPEAKER_03 52:03

You're like, I've been there. Okay. Now we were talking about providers a good bit. Have you noticed that people who come to you, women, even like young girls, like if you're talking to your daughter, when you're looking for a provider, do you think it's important for them to be a woman? Or do you think that there are men that are able to for me? I feel like it would be hard to understand completely and take their word. So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:30

So I'm sure that there are male doctors out there that know a lot of stuff. Sure. Yeah. But you haven't felt it, you haven't gone through it. I just I personally feel more comfortable talking to a woman. Again, I know I know and I've talked to clients that have male providers and they love them. Okay. And it's just who you're comfortable with and how knowledgeable they are and how what how much time they put into really learning this stuff because they weren't taught. And we can go into all the history of you know what happened with the women's health initiative and why education about perimenopause and menopause went out the door in medical school. We could we could dive really deep into that. But yeah, I think that one of the things for me, I feel really fortunate to live in a time where there is social media and there is a lot of talk about it because 20 years ago, 30 years ago, there was it wasn't there for my mom.

SPEAKER_03 53:36

Yeah. It wasn't there for so many people. And I think like that older generation, it was almost shameful, I guess, to talk about not being yourself, like how you thought you were. Yeah. And then you morph into this other person because that's what people expect. I'm not afraid to tell anybody. Right.

SPEAKER_02 53:52

You don't feel like yourself. Well, what what the hell does that mean? Exactly. I don't feel like myself, and I wake up and I I just I look at myself and I don't recognize myself, and I've gained weight and I'm pissed off about that, and I'm tired all the time, and I'm pissed off about that, and I'm not sleeping at night. And then all of those things kind of snowball into bigger things, and it's not always recognized that is started from a hormonal shift that we're going through.

SPEAKER_03 54:20

Now, there's another question I have if the medical marijuana will help with menopause, perimenopause symptoms. Have you had any experience with that? Have you chatted with people going down that route?

SPEAKER_02 54:32

I believe that, and um I'm not ashamed to say that I much prefer THC drinks to alcohol because my body doesn't metabolize alcohol the way it used to. Now I did find a supplement, it's called glutathione. Okay. That has helped me tolerate. I got to a point where I couldn't even drink one drink. Like a sip would make me feel sick.

SPEAKER_04 55:00

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 55:00

And so I just was totally off it for a while, and then I started seeing these commercials for glutathione, and I knew I was going on a family vacation that was gonna include alcohol, and so I was like, let me just try it. Yeah. Because not every state allows you to have THC beverages. That is very true. And so I wanted to make sure that I was prepared, and so I started taking the glutathione about a week before the vacation, and it really helped. Wow. Now I'm not out there partying like I was when I was in my 20s and 30s, but I can I can have a few drinks. Right, okay. Um, I do think that peep women are going to dispensaries because it maybe they are having that alcohol aversion. Yeah. I think that's feeling like we're not and it it messes with your sleep. It fucks with your sleep, and then you wake up in the morning feeling like you've been hit by a truck, even if you've just had a couple. Yeah. So yeah, the THC is is a nice alternative. There are CBD drinks that are nice alternatives. There are um adaptogen, uh adaptogenic drinks, uh, the ones that have mushrooms in them that are nice alternatives. Interesting. And the nice thing about those beverages is I I I I would be a paid spokesperson if anybody wanted me to. Um I have a couple brands in mind, actually, so I will pass them along. They have a lot less calories than alcohol. I've noticed that. They have a lot less calories, and I don't feel hung over at all.

SPEAKER_03 56:33

Especially with like the CBD cream. Oh, yes, and the gummies. The gummies. The gummy game has just changed things so much for people. Yeah, so much for people.

SPEAKER_02 56:43

And it's just a nice little lift. Like you just don't feel the same, you're you don't get out of control like you do with alcohol, or you know, sometimes you have a like, light little gummy, and then you just have one beverage when you're out instead of yeah.

SPEAKER_03 56:56

But I like that you're normalizing this too, like the THC and like not having so much of a stigma against it. Because there are a lot of women who think, oh, that's the devil's drug.

SPEAKER_02 57:05

Like, track you off. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is.

SPEAKER_03 57:09

Yeah, no, that's the way it is. Yeah. Because I mean, everyone's desperate to find something in some sort of way to help them. Right. And if that's it for you, no shame.

unknown 57:19

Right.

SPEAKER_03 57:19

No shame. No shame. Now I want to end with you telling the audience. So feel free to look in that camera, talk to them one-on-one. What do you want them to get out of if they don't get anything else out of this episode? What do you want them to get out?

SPEAKER_02 57:34

The one thing that I want you to know is you're not alone, you're not broken, you're not crazy, and education is power. You must arm yourself with education. And I mean, we didn't even touch on things like going in and talking to your provider. Go in with the stats. You as soon as you start feeling off, as soon as you start not sleeping, as soon as you start feeling irrational, having anxiety, whatever it might be, keep a log. Talk about how long it's lasting, how many days a week it's affecting you, how it's impacting your day-to-day life, how it's impacting your relationships, your work, whatever it might be, go in with the statistics and say, here you go. Because going in and just saying, I don't feel like myself to your provider is not going to be enough. And if you have a provider who is offering you something, that's great. But ask why. Ask why they're offering you this over something else. What are the side effects? When can I expect to feel better? All the things. And if you need help with that, please reach out to me.

SPEAKER_03 58:44

And where can people find you?

SPEAKER_02 58:45

People can find me at pausingit on Facebook, pausing it 2025 on Instagram. My email is pausingit2025 at gmail.com.

SPEAKER_03 59:00

And all of this information will be at the link in the bio in the description and on my page as well. Thank you so much for the video.

SPEAKER_02 59:07

I'm not great at social media, so I don't remember all the things. And I do have a TikTok that I just started, but it's it still has my name, Sheila Milan. I think it's Sheila.malan2.

SPEAKER_03 59:16

You also have the coolest name, by the way. Like it sounds like a 1990s like pop singer, and I love it. That's Sheila Milan. She's coming to you live. Thanks. I always wanted to be a pop star.

SPEAKER_02 59:27

I love it. I love it. Thank you so much for being here. Oh, thank you for having me. And I want to come back because we have a lot of. I think that once we talk about this and it gets out there, I think there'll be more questions.

SPEAKER_03 59:38

Oh, yeah. I I can hear my inbox flooding already.

SPEAKER_02 59:41

Awesome.