You Were Never Meant to Carry This Alone | Overcoming Isolation in Medicine

Discover why your support system is like a patient's vital signs, and how to build a circle that carries you through your healthcare journey when it matters most. 

In this episode, Fred Nazario-Alvarado shares a deeply personal story from his first days of Navy bootcamp, a moment of complete isolation that taught him the difference between surviving and thriving in healthcare. You'll learn why no one succeeds alone, how to recognize the people who truly elevate your growth, and what sustains you when your support system can't be in the room with you. 

What You'll Learn in This Episode: 

• Why your support system functions like a patient's vital signs 
• The four qualities to look for in the people closest to you: steady, honest, grounded, and growth-minded 
• How to assess your current circle and identify gaps 
• Signs a relationship may not be serving your growth 
• The powerful role your "WHY" plays when you're standing alone 
• How to build and strengthen your support system starting today 

Whether you're a nursing student, medical assistant, EMT, or anyone pursuing a healthcare career, this episode will remind you that your journey is too important to walk alone—and that you are worth fighting for. 

My Recommended Stethoscope
I still use my Littmann from 2011 because it lasts. This is the modern version of the one I carry.

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Transcript

0:01

there's a moment coming in your healthcare journey. Maybe it's already here, where you'll stand in a room facing something bigger than anything you've prepared for. And in that moment, you'll realize something important. The strongest people you know didn't get that way by standing alone. They had someone who believed in them when they couldn't believe in themselves. Someone who steadied them when doubt crept in. Someone who reminded them that greatness doesn't grow in isolation. It grows in community. And if you've been carrying this weight by yourself, wondering if you're strong enough, capable enough, worthy enough, today's episode is for you. Welcome back to MAP, Medical Pathways for Success. I'm Fred Nazario Alvarado, and today we're having a conversation that could honestly change the trajectory of your entire career. We're talking about your support system. Not just people who care for you from a distance. I mean the ones who stand beside you when the pressure builds. The ones who remind you of your purpose when doubt starts creeping in. The people who help you rise during the moments You feel like collapsing. But here's what most people don't tell you. And I wish someone told me this earlier. There will be moments when those people can't be in the room with you. Moments when you stand completely alone and the only thing you have to lean on is the reason you started this journey in the first place. So today, we're exploring both sides of this. How to build the support that carries you and how to find the strength within yourself when that support isn't within reach. Because here's the truth, your success in healthcare isn't just about how strong you are. It's about who strengthens you along the way and who sustains you when you're standing alone. Let's get into it. Let me be straight with you, support isn't a luxury. It isn't something that's nice to have. It's the foundation that determines how far you can actually go. Healthcare asks more of you than most careers ever will. It asks for patience when you're exhausted, empathy when you're overwhelmed, focus when everything around you feels chaotic and the ability to stay grounded even when your own world is falling apart. When you choose this path, you choose a life where people depend on you during their most fragile moments. That's not something you walk into casually and it's definitely not something you walk through alone. Let's think about it this way. A strong support system becomes the emotional scaffolding that keeps you standing when everything in you wants to collapse. You will have days where you come home completely drained, questioning everything, maybe even the decision to enter healthcare at all. Days where you feel invisible, misunderstood, or underappreciated. And there may even be days when you've poured so much into others that there's nothing left for yourself. On those days, the right support is the difference between giving up and pushing forward. And support shows up in different forms than you might think. It's the friend who reminds you why you started, the instructor who sees potential you haven't recognized in yourself yet, the coworker who says, you handled that like a pro. The family member who celebrates your small wins because they understand the battles you're fighting behind the scenes. This isn't just emotional reassurance. It's resilience. It's energy. And it's the safety net that catches you before you hit the ground. And here's something that the research backs up. People with strong social support networks have better health outcomes, longer lives, and report higher overall well-being. They're more resilient when stress, setback, or loss hits. Sometimes the people closest to you can even recognize when you're struggling before you even realize it yourself. But when you don't have support, everything feels heavier. Studying becomes overwhelming. Skills feel more intimidating. Setbacks feel personal. And mistakes? They feel like proof that you're not cut out for this. With support though, something shifts. Challenges become lessons. Fears become courage. Pressure becomes growth. And those tough days become evidence of how strong you really are. Support is the difference between carrying this weight alone and sharing it with people who genuinely want to see you win. So what exactly does support look like? It's not just people clapping from the distance. It's people who stand close enough to steady you when life pushes you off balance. Support shows up quietly, in the form of belief, in the form of presence, and in the form of someone choosing to stand by you even when the road gets difficult. I learned this firsthand, and it started with a decision that changed the entire direction. my life. My best friend was the reason I joined the military. He enlisted to become a hospital corpsman because he loved medicine and wanted a life of purpose, helping people in their most vulnerable moments. When he told me he was heading to boot camp in August, right after graduation, something shifted in me. At the time, I was freshly out of high school with no direction and no plan. I had no sense of where life was pushing me, and while I stood in that uncertainty, my best friend already had a path laid out, with complete support behind him at that. His family stood firmly behind his decision, proud and ready to help him with his goals. Seeing that made me confront myself for the first time. What did I actually want in my life? What do I want to become? And answer didn't come from pressure. It came from clarity. I didn't want fame or money or recognition. I wanted to help people. I wanted to treat the injured. I wanted to show up when others needed me most. But it wasn't just about joining the military. It was about standing with my best friend, choosing a path that felt meaningful, stepping into something that terrified me because the alternative, staying lost, was even scarier. So I made the decision, I was joining the Navy too. When I told my mom, she didn't hide her feelings. The first thing she asked was simple, but heavy. Are you sure this is what you want to do with your life? The moment I said yes, she didn't hesitate. She didn't argue. She didn't even try to convince me to stay. She didn't let her fear become her limitation. She got up, grabbed her keys, and drove me to the recruiter's office herself. That moment changed me. Support isn't always someone pushing you to chase your dreams. Sometimes, It's someone helping you take that step towards those dreams, even when it breaks their heart a little. Sometimes support is sacrifice. Sometimes it's love expressed quietly through action. Sometimes it can even be letting you go so you can grow. My mom didn't want me to leave, but she wanted me to become the man I was trying to become. She wanted me to find purpose. to stand strong and build a life I could be proud of. And because she supported me, I took that step. Your support system might look completely different. It might be one person or a whole community, someone you've known forever or someone you just met. What matters is this. A support system isn't about having people who cheer loudly. It's about having people who stand with you when the noise fades. It's knowing someone believes in your potential, even on the days you doubt it. It's having someone who gives you strength just by being present. Not every journey starts with applause, but the right support system will walk beside you through the moments that shape who you are becoming. Here's the truth I want you to hold on to. Not everyone deserves a seat at your inner circle. As you grow in the healthcare role, this becomes clearer than ever. And the people you surrounded yourself with, they matter more than you might realize. I want to share a way of thinking about this that might resonate with you as a future healthcare professional. Your support system becomes like the vital signs of your personal and professional wellbeing. Think about it when a patient enters your care. You check their vitals, temperatures, heart rate, respiration, and blood pressure, because these readings tell you just how stable they are. Whether they have what they need to function or whether something unseen is pulling them towards danger, your support system works the same way. The people closest to you either stabilize you or destabilize you. They either regulate your emotional blood pressure or they spike it. They either help you breathe more freely or they leave you gasping for air. The right people become your oxygen, the ones who keep you grounded when life's weight starts pressing on your chest. The wrong people, they become the stressor that pushes your heart rate into dangerous territory. Healthcare will test you in ways you've never experienced. You'll witness fear, pain, and uncertainty. You'll hold someone's hand while they shake. you'll explain news that's hard to swallow. You'll walk into rooms heavy with emotion. Those moments, they demand strength, clarity, and compassion that doesn't collapse under pressure. That's why who you surround yourself with matters so much. Let me break down what to look for. Number one, you need people who are steady, like a consistent heart rhythm. Support that doesn't spike and disappear. Support that stays even when the environment becomes unpredictable. These people bring calm when everything feels chaotic. Number two, you need people who are honest, like accurate readings on a monitor. Not sugar-coated, not filtered, not telling you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear to grow. In healthcare, Honest feedback saves patience. In life, honest support saves futures. Number three, you need people who are grounded, like a stable blood pressure. People who bring balance, who remind you to breathe, who keep you from spiraling when stress takes over. Number four, you need people who are growth-minded. People who elevate your long-term health, not just your day-to-day comfort. They don't just help you survive the journey. They help you thrive in it. Think about what happens when a patient suddenly declines. You call for help, but you don't call just anyone. You call the people you trust. The ones who respond quickly, calmly, and completely. The ones who won't freeze under pressure. That's exactly how your support system should work. Now here's the part people rarely admit. As you grow in healthcare, you will outgrow certain relationships. Not because you think you're better than anyone, but because your purpose is evolving. Your priorities are shifting. Your emotional capacity is becoming more refined. And not everyone is meant to walk with you into the next chapter of your life. Some people are a part of your past, not your future. Some can't carry the emotional weight of the goals you're building towards. Some only understand who you used to be, not who you are becoming. And that's okay. Here are some signs a relationship might not be serving your growth. You feel drained every time you interact with them. They're inconsiderate of your time or feelings. They're unreliable or highly critical. They belittle your goals or ignore your progress. They engage in behaviors that pull you away from who you're working to become. Remember, those in your support system should help you reduce stress, not increase it. They should support your goals, not undermine them. Your support system doesn't need to be big. It just needs to be aligned. Two solid people who uplift you are better than 10 who drain you. One mentor who sharpens you is better than a crowd that keeps you stagnant. Here's the reality. The people you surround yourself with don't just affect how you feel today. They influence how you recover from setbacks, how you see yourself, and the kind of healthcare professional you're growing into. And in healthcare, a field where you will one day be someone else's support system, that choice isn't optional. It's essential. So, how do you actually build the support system? Here's the thing. It's not something you stumble into. It's something you build with intention. And you can start right now. Begin by asking yourself some real questions. Who makes me feel stronger when I talk to them? Who listens without judgment? Who pushes me to think bigger and try harder? Who brings clarity instead of confusion? Who believes in the version of me I'm working on? These questions help you identify something essential. Who is safe for your growth? Your support system isn't based on who you're closest to or who you've known the longest. It's based on who is aligned with the direction your life is taking. If you're still in school, stop and look around your classroom. The people sitting right beside you are fighting the same battles you are. They're studying late, juggling responsibilities, battling imposter syndrome, pushing themselves towards a future that demands courage. That shared struggle? That's a bond. And bonds like that can grow into support systems that last for years. I saw this firsthand in the military, both with my time in the Navy, and during my time with the Marines. We bonded so deeply with our companies and sections because we all went through the same grueling training and missions together. That shared experience taught us to become supports for one another. We held each other accountable when someone was struggling. We didn't let each other fail. Your classmates can become the same kind of support for you. In the military, we had a saying. One team, one fight. Your classmates, they can become the people who sit with you during stressful study sessions, who celebrate with you when you pass an exam, who pick you up when you fail, and who remind you that you're not alone. One team, that's what you are. And when they are going through the same things, you can be their support system. One fight. If you're already in the workplace, one team, one fight already applies to you. Look at your coworkers. There's always one or two who stand out. The ones who carry themselves with calmness, compassion, and confidence. Who treat patients with dignity even when the day is overwhelming. Who step in to help not because they have to, but because that's who they are. Those are people worth learning from, worth connecting with, and worth keeping close. Consider joining professional organizations too. This extends your network to others in the field. People who understand the stresses you face better than anyone else can. Volunteer for causes you care about. This brings you into contact with others who share your values. And shared values? Those are the foundations of meaningful support. but here's what most people overlook. You have to learn to recognize support even when it doesn't look like what you expected. Support isn't always loud or obvious. Sometimes it's someone checking in after a long shift, someone offering to help you practice a skill. It can even be just someone saying, don't give up. I see how hard you're working. These small moments become the threads that weave your support network together. And maintaining that network takes effort. Show appreciation. Tell people how much they mean to you. Stay in touch. Be available when they need you. Accept help when it's offered. Some people find that hard, myself included. But letting others support you keeps that relationship balanced. It's happened to me just recently. I was reached out to by someone who was willing to help me with this podcast. I was worried because my original episodes were more monotone. And I was going off a script. The reason I was going off a script is because I wanted to be perfect and I wanted to make sure that you all got what I was trying to say. But this person reached out and was able to help me realize that it isn't just about being perfect. It's about showing that emotion and being there for you. They showed me that this podcast, in a way, is its own form of support system for you all. And because of that, I was able to realize... That being more myself versus reading off a script is more important because it gives us more of a connection. So you can find support in ways that you never even expected. And honestly, support can even find you if you're willing to accept it when it's offered. Now here's the most important part of building your support system. You have to include yourself in it. This is where future healthcare professionals often struggle because you're so used to being strong for everyone else. You're used to giving comfort, fixing, and being the person others rely on. But you can't expect others to support you if you're constantly tearing yourself down from inside. You need to speak to yourself with the same patience you'd give a scared patient. With the same compassion, you'd offer a child getting their first vaccine. And with the same kindness, you'd show someone who is hurting. You need to become part of the support that carries you. Because when you learn to support yourself, and I mean truly support yourself, your external support system becomes even more powerful. Their encouragement hits deeper, their presence becomes more meaningful, and their guidance becomes clearer. You're no longer relying on others to carry you. You're allowing them to walk with you. Building a support system isn't about creating a group of people who will rescue you. It's about creating a circle that empowers you. A circle that understands your purpose and that respects your goals. And that aligns with the healthcare professional you're becoming. A circle you can lean on and a circle that can lean on you. Support is not a weakness. Support is strategy. It's strength shared. and its growth multiplied. And you deserve a support system that helps you rise. But even the strongest circles around you, even with every piece in place, there will be moments where life puts you somewhere where your support system can't reach you. Moments where you're facing something bigger than anything you prepared for. And the room feels painfully quiet. these moments matter. Because those are the moments that test what you're really made of. Let me tell you about the moment I learned this the hard way. There will come a time when you feel completely alone. A moment where everything familiar disappears and the world feels too big, too loud, too different to process. For me, that moment hit the second I stepped out of the van into boot camp. Yes, I was picked up in the van. Most people got in the bus, but I was picked up in the van because I got there late. But anyway, I told you earlier about my decision to join. about my best friend's influence and my mom driving me to the recruiter. That was the beginning. But what I haven't told you yet is what happened when I actually arrived. The air was thick. The pace was fast. Everything demanded obedience, precision, and instant adjustment. One minute you're a civilian and the next everything you've ever known is stripped away to rebuild you from the ground up. It was a shock I wasn't ready for. Those first few days, man, were they hard. harder than anything I'd experienced at that point in my life. I had never felt more alone in my life. No familiar faces, no reassuring voices, no mom to lean on, no best friend to talk to. No one telling me I could do it, just me, just the noise, just the pressure. And that silence, The silence of not having my support system with me created space for the doubt to get louder than ever. Imposter syndrome hit me like a right hook I didn't even see coming. What am I doing here? Did I make a mistake? Am I really cut out for this? Am I even strong enough to do this? Every voice of doubt I ever tried to ignore finally found the chance to speak freely. And this is where the truth hits. There will be a moment in your life, in healthcare, in growth, and becoming who you want to be, where your support system won't be physically present, where the people you love can't stand shoulder to shoulder with you, where your journey requires you to be the one holding yourself up. That's exactly where I found myself. But here's what changed everything. When the people I leaned on weren't there, my why stepped in. My reason for joining, to help people, to grow, to serve. to become someone I could be proud of became the voice that steadied me. When I wanted to quit, my why reminded me I didn't come this far to fall apart now. When I felt lost, my why reminded me I chose this path with purpose. When I felt weak, my why reminded me that purpose creates strength. You don't even know you have. My why became my support system when my support system wasn't within reach. That purpose carried me day after day, moment after moment, until one afternoon. My first letter arrived, a piece of home. A reminder that I wasn't actually alone, proof that people who believed in me were still there, even if they couldn't stand next to me. It was from my mom, her handwriting, a few pages telling me about our dog, about my little brother's shenanigans, and how proud she was of me. Nothing profound, just home. But in that moment, It was everything. That letter felt like oxygen, like I was able to breathe again. Like a lifeline, like confirmation that I could make it through the rest of this journey. But the truth is, I made it to that letter because my why carried me long enough to receive it. And that's the lesson I want you to hold on to. Your support system may not always be in the room, but your why is always with you. When you're stressed in class, your why is there. When you're overwhelmed during clinicals, your why is there. When you're making a mistake on the job, your why is there. When you feel like you're not good enough, your why is there. Support is powerful, but purpose? That's unstoppable. You need both. And when one is in present, the other steps in. Bootcamp taught me something I'll never forget. Your support system helps you stand. Your why helps you survive. And both are essential to who you're becoming as a healthcare professional. Now let's pause, reflect, and let's get into your map moment. It's time for your mad moment A quick little push to keep you going Stay focused, keep strong Your pathway to success is on This week, I have a two-part challenge for you, and I want you to complete both parts before the weekend. Part one, check your vitals. Remember how we talked about your support system being like a patient's vital signs? I want you to actually assess yours. Take five minutes, grab a piece of paper, or open the notes app on your phone. Create four categories. Number one, steady. Who brings me calm when things are chaotic? Number two, honest. Who tells me what I need to hear, not just what I want to hear. Number three, grounded. Who keeps me balanced when stress takes over? Number four, growth minded. Who pushes me to be better? Now fill in names. Some people might appear in multiple categories. Some categories might be empty. That's okay. This isn't about judgment. It's about awareness. If you notice gaps, that's valuable information. It tells you where to focus as you build your support systems moving forward. And if you notice names that drain you more than sustain you, that's valuable too. This is your baseline reading, your vitals check. And just like in patient care, you can't improve what you don't assess. Part two, strengthen your connection. Now look at the list. Pick one person, someone who truly supports your growth. Before this week ends, send them one message. not generic, but specific. Say something like this. Let me take my best friend for example. Hey bro, you probably don't realize this, but when you told me you were joining the Navy, it showed me that I needed my own purpose and it inspired me to join also. Thank you for being such a huge part of my foundation. 30 seconds of courage, that's all it takes. Here's why this matters. When you reach out, you're not just acknowledging their influence, you're inviting them to walk this journey with you. You're strengthening a vital sign in your support system. And here's the beautiful part. Sometimes all it takes is one message, one honest moment, to transform a simple acquaintance into a lifelong pillar of support. You'll walk away with two things, clarity on who's actually in your corner and a stronger connection with someone who matters. That's not just a challenge. That's progress. So take these steps. Not later. Not eventually, this week. Because your journey is too important to walk alone. And you deserve to be surrounded by people who see your potential even before you fully step into it. You're walking a path that not everyone can walk. A path that asks you to show up for others with strength, compassion, and courage. Even on the days when you're barely holding yourself together. And you're doing it anyway. You're showing up. You're learning. You're growing. And you're stepping into a future where people will trust you with their lives, their fears, and their healing. That alone makes you extraordinary. But even extraordinary people need support. They need community. They need reminders of why they started. They need voices that lift them when the world gets heavy. You deserve that kind of support. You deserve a circle that believes in your future. You deserve people who remind you of your strength when you forget. And when those people can't be beside you, when life places you somewhere you have to face the moments alone, remember this. Your why never leaves you. Your purpose never abandons you. Your growth never stops. Even when the world feels still, you are becoming someone powerful, someone needed, someone capable of impacting lives in ways you haven't even imagined yet. So build your support system with intention. Lean into the people who see your potential clearly. Reach out to the ones who inspire you. Check your vitals, check your circle, and keep moving forward. Because your journey, your map, is worth protecting, worth nurturing, and worth fighting for. If you enjoyed today's episode, follow the show and share it with anyone chasing their healthcare dreams. And if you've got a story to share, a question, or a topic you want me to cover, I'd love to hear from you. Email me at madpodcasts at outlook.com or connect with us on Facebook and Instagram. Just search MAP Podcast Official. Your ideas and experiences could inspire someone else on their path. Until next time, keep learning, keep growing, and keep following your MAP. your medical pathway for success.