SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Family Church's Sermon of the Week.
SPEAKER_00: We're so glad you're here.
SPEAKER_00: Each week we share a message from God's Word to encourage your heart, strengthen your faith, and help you grow in your walk with Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: We hope this time blesses you and draws you closer to the heart of God.
SPEAKER_01: Well, this morning, I'm gonna I am gonna speak because it's Father's Day, I'm gonna speak specifically to men today.
SPEAKER_01: But we're we're gonna talk about something called the regulated man.
SPEAKER_01: And this has nothing to do with the high fiber, high fiber diet.
SPEAKER_01: Um, but everything I tell you today from the scripture is applies to everyone in here: man, woman, adult, child, whatever.
SPEAKER_01: It applies to all of us.
SPEAKER_01: But I am gonna speak specifically to men today.
SPEAKER_01: So I want to go to uh Psalm chapter 128, the 128th Psalm.
SPEAKER_01: If you've got Bibles and you want to turn there, look at look there with us, and it says this in verse 1, it says, How joyful are those who fear the Lord, all who follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: Fear God, follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: Two things in there.
SPEAKER_01: And it says, it says, How joyful are those who fear God and who follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: And now I told you, fearing God is kind of hard to understand.
SPEAKER_01: So I told you a story a few months ago, and I'm gonna tell it again because I think it's a good way to help you understand what it means to fear God.
SPEAKER_01: When I was in eighth grade, I went to a Christian school over in Fairfax, and and I was at a basketball game one night, and some high school boys came up to me and said, Hey, Mazingo, come here, come here.
SPEAKER_01: We want you to go through the locker room to the back hallway and open that door and let us in.
SPEAKER_01: And I thought, okay, well, why?
SPEAKER_01: And they said, because we're gonna throw firecrackers in there.
SPEAKER_01: And I thought, oh, that makes sense.
SPEAKER_01: You know, if you're gonna throw firecrackers, you gotta have somebody open the door.
SPEAKER_01: So I went around, went through the locker room, went through, opened the door for them, and uh let him in, and then I disappeared and went back up into the bleachers.
SPEAKER_01: About 10 minutes later, there's an explosion in that back hallway.
SPEAKER_01: I I don't mean firecrackers, I mean there was an explosion because what they threw in there was an M80.
SPEAKER_01: You guys know what an M80 is?
SPEAKER_01: That's an eighth of a stick of dynamite.
SPEAKER_01: That's what they threw in.
SPEAKER_01: And uh, so you know, somebody yelled, fire, the game stopped, guys are running with fire extinguishers, they go in there.
SPEAKER_01: There was no fire, just a lot of smoke from the from the bomb that went off.
SPEAKER_01: And uh, so I'm like, oh man, that's that's that's no firecracker.
SPEAKER_01: So I just sat there in the bleachers for about 20 minutes, and then I see the principal walk out in front of the bleachers, and he he catches my eye and he goes, and I'm like, I'm a dead man.
SPEAKER_01: And so I'm walking, walking down out of the bleachers thinking, okay, how can I get out of this?
SPEAKER_01: All I did was open a door.
SPEAKER_01: That's all I did.
SPEAKER_01: You know, I can get out of this, I can do this, I'm charming, I can get out of this.
SPEAKER_01: So I go into the principal's office, and when he opens the door to let me in, my dad is sitting there.
SPEAKER_01: In that 20 minutes, he called my dad.
SPEAKER_01: My dad never went to a basketball game.
SPEAKER_01: He called my dad, and my dad was sitting in the office.
SPEAKER_01: So I went from, I went from, you know, conniving and planning, figuring out how am I going to dodge this, to just total shame.
SPEAKER_01: Total shame.
SPEAKER_01: Because there's a big difference between having to face the consequences of your actions and standing and facing your father.
SPEAKER_01: And that's what the fear of God is like.
SPEAKER_01: You know, we don't serve a God who's who's standing and waiting to strike us with lightning every time we do something wrong.
SPEAKER_01: That's not the God that we serve.
SPEAKER_01: We serve a God that loves us, redeemed us, died for us.
SPEAKER_01: And when we sin, when we do something wrong, and we have to stand before Him, that's worse than the consequences ever would be.
SPEAKER_01: Because He loves us so much.
SPEAKER_01: And the fear of God is much like that.
SPEAKER_01: Not that we're afraid of our God, but we are we are afraid knowing that we're going to let God down in that way.
SPEAKER_01: You know, we're still gonna face the consequences of our actions, but we're gonna stand before God for it.
SPEAKER_01: That's what the fear of God is like.
SPEAKER_01: And so that verse, verse one, says, Fear God and follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: And the man that does that will find joy.
SPEAKER_01: He'll find joy.
SPEAKER_01: And and and this is what this is what uh uh what that joy looks like.
SPEAKER_01: It says, You will enjoy the fruit of your labor, how joyful and prosperous you will be.
SPEAKER_01: Fear God, follow his ways, and you will enjoy the fruit of your labor.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: And it said the fruit of your what?
SPEAKER_01: Fruit of your labor.
SPEAKER_01: Labor is work.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, you'll enjoy the fruit of your efforts.
SPEAKER_01: Following God, fearing God and following his ways is not a passive activity.
SPEAKER_01: It takes a significant amount of effort to follow God.
SPEAKER_01: There's never gonna be a time in your life where you're sitting there and God is just gonna come over you so much and so bless bless you so much that you're never gonna sin again.
SPEAKER_01: You're not, you know, you're not gonna reach that point.
SPEAKER_01: And God's not just gonna come over you and boom, your all your problems are gone.
SPEAKER_01: It takes effort, it takes work on your part, it takes being deliberate, deliberately choosing to follow God.
SPEAKER_01: And when you do, you enjoy the fruits of your labor.
SPEAKER_01: And and so it's kind of like this.
SPEAKER_01: It's kind of like this.
SPEAKER_01: You know, all men, all of us have, all of us, if you know Jesus, we all have the same thing.
SPEAKER_01: We all have the same power at our disposal, we all have the same resources at our disposal.
SPEAKER_01: We have we have uh a God who loves us, we have his word to lead us, and we have the Holy Spirit living inside of us.
SPEAKER_01: Every single one of us.
SPEAKER_01: So it's kind of like this.
SPEAKER_01: I got three propane tanks up here.
SPEAKER_01: All right?
SPEAKER_01: Every one of these propane tanks, when they're full, have the exact same amount of power in them.
SPEAKER_01: And they can be used different ways.
SPEAKER_01: So this one, this has this has it's actually like a flamethrower attached to it.
SPEAKER_01: And this is like one of my favorite tools, man, using this in the yard, you know, and uh, and I was actually gonna fire it up and show you how it works, but we have an agreement with Prince William County that we won't even light a candle in here.
SPEAKER_01: So I figured it's probably not a good idea that I use a flamethrower and and I really don't have the time to find another place for us to meet.
SPEAKER_01: So we're just gonna pretend it's there.
SPEAKER_01: But when I pull this trigger, like a flame shoots out of the end of this, like eight to ten feet long, you know, and I've got an acre and a half of leaves I got to get rid of every year, so this comes in real handy to get rid of those leaves, because in Fawkir County you're allowed to burn leaves.
SPEAKER_01: That's a great place to be.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, so somebody's applauding, listen to that.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, but that kind of flame is hard to control.
SPEAKER_01: When you have that much power coming out of the end of this, it's hard to control.
SPEAKER_01: And if you aim it in the wrong direction, you're gonna do a lot of damage.
SPEAKER_01: You're gonna do a lot of damage.
SPEAKER_01: And so every man in this room that has the same uh power, same opportunity, same resources, can take take everything God has created in him and use it like that flamethrower.
SPEAKER_01: You can be the flamethrower father, and and you can be out of control.
SPEAKER_01: You can take that manliness and you can use it to hurt people.
SPEAKER_01: And and it looks something like this.
SPEAKER_01: You know, this is the guy, you know, the guy that that is out of control like that.
SPEAKER_01: This is the guy that that is uh is uh uh he's the kind of guy that takes advantage of women.
SPEAKER_01: You know, he thinks manliness is all about women and he takes advantage of them.
SPEAKER_01: This is this is the guy who will manipulate others to get what he wants.
SPEAKER_01: He'll uses words to manipulate others.
SPEAKER_01: Uh this is the guy who will bully others.
SPEAKER_01: He'll bully them, even his wife and kids, he'll bully them to get his way.
SPEAKER_01: That's what the flame flow flamethrower father looks like.
SPEAKER_01: This guy thinks that real masculinity is equal to the ball field, the boardroom, and the bedroom.
SPEAKER_01: That's what masculinity is, and it's all about that.
SPEAKER_01: And this is the guy who leaves a trail of hurt people and broken relationships in his past.
SPEAKER_01: That's all it is.
SPEAKER_01: When your masculinity is out of control, you leave a trail of hurt people and broken relationships.
SPEAKER_01: And this is the kind of guy that be in part, you know, our culture labels all masculinity toxic because of that guy.
SPEAKER_01: Because he's out of control.
SPEAKER_01: And there's hurt people all around him because it's all about me, and he pretends that there are no hurt people.
SPEAKER_01: That he that this this doesn't bother him.
SPEAKER_01: He print he you know, he he pretends that this is just the way things are, and he's okay with it.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: But there's another there's another kind of toxic, and I think it's even more toxic personally.
SPEAKER_01: This tank has all the same power, all the same potential, but it's disconnected.
SPEAKER_01: It's never coming out of there.
SPEAKER_01: Nothing's ever gonna come out because it's disconnected.
SPEAKER_01: And and I think the most toxic men in Christianity are the ones that are completely disconnected.
SPEAKER_01: They show up at church and they're fine just filling a pew every Sunday in their homes.
SPEAKER_01: They they abdicate all of the important stuff to their wife, and they're disconnected.
SPEAKER_01: This is the guy who is totally disengaged and uninvolved with his family and his church.
SPEAKER_01: Totally, totally disengaged.
SPEAKER_01: This is the guy that looks forward to spending less time with people.
SPEAKER_01: He loves to live in isolation, and that's a dangerous place because that's where Satan wants you.
SPEAKER_01: When you're when you're isolated, Satan's going, I got him where I want him.
SPEAKER_01: I do my best work when you're isolated.
SPEAKER_01: And his habits are probably less conspicuous than the flamethrower father, but his habits still rob him of time with his wife and his kids, and his habits look look like things that are okay, you know, like sports.
SPEAKER_01: You know, nothing wrong with sports, but when sports robs you of time that you should be spending with your wife and kids, or it's your excuse to not be with your wife and kids, that's a problem.
SPEAKER_01: If you spend more time with SportsCenter than you do your family, that's a problem.
SPEAKER_01: If you pay more attention to ESPN than you do B-I-B-L-E, that's a problem.
SPEAKER_01: You know, and and other habits are like like video games, you know, and and I have strong opinions about video games, and I just say, I've grown up, I'm not gonna play video games.
SPEAKER_01: You know, but there are there are men, grown men, 40-year-old men, that will spend more time on the PlayStation than they do playing with their kids, and that's a problem.
SPEAKER_01: Video games, online gambling, excessive scrolling and watching television, those things that are make a man passive and disengaged from what he should be doing.
SPEAKER_01: And it's a problem.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, the disconnected man lets his wife raise the kids.
SPEAKER_01: She makes the decisions.
SPEAKER_01: He has no input for whatever reason.
SPEAKER_01: He lets his wife do it.
SPEAKER_01: He invests little time into his marriage, but he expects great return.
SPEAKER_01: He lets his wife be the spiritual leader of the home rather than doing what God has called him to do and stepping up and leading them spiritually.
SPEAKER_01: And let me just say, there's not a man in this room that is really good at leading their family spiritually, okay, myself included.
SPEAKER_01: But wives, you got to give them time to learn how to do it right.
SPEAKER_01: Because the temptation is, if he tries to lead them spiritually and he does it different than you do, the temptation is to go, that's not the right way.
SPEAKER_01: And if you say that enough, he's just gonna go, fine, you do it.
SPEAKER_01: And he's gonna abdicate to his wife to lead the family spiritually.
SPEAKER_01: This is the guy who is total the totally unengaged and absent father.
SPEAKER_01: Totally unengaged and absent father.
SPEAKER_01: And you may think, guys, you may think that your absence, you know, when you're unengaged, you may think you're doing people a favor, but you're not.
SPEAKER_01: You're still hurting your family.
SPEAKER_01: Your family's wondering, why isn't dad helping?
SPEAKER_01: Your wife is wondering, why isn't my why isn't my husband taking the lead?
SPEAKER_01: Your kids are wondering, where is my father when I need him?
SPEAKER_01: When Haley, our oldest, when she was four years old, I was working on my master's and I was studying a lot and and was, you know, I was at school two, three nights a week.
SPEAKER_01: I was in my room at the desk getting work done and writing papers and stuff.
SPEAKER_01: One of my best friends, his name's Ron, came over and uh uh uh he was out in the front yard and Haley came up to him and she said, he came and told me this later, and I appreciate him doing that.
SPEAKER_01: Haley said, Uncle Ronnie, would you play with me?
SPEAKER_01: My dad doesn't have time.
SPEAKER_01: When Ronnie told me that, I started crying.
SPEAKER_01: Broke my heart.
SPEAKER_01: Because I don't want to be that dad.
SPEAKER_01: I don't want to be the dad that's so busy with so many other things that I'm disengaged from my kids.
SPEAKER_01: You know, and and a lot of us grew up with one of those fathers.
SPEAKER_01: You know, you may have had the flamethrower father, or or more likely you had a disengaged father that kind of left everything to mom.
SPEAKER_01: You know, and so that's all you know, so that's what you're repeating.
SPEAKER_01: But there's another kind of father.
SPEAKER_01: There's another kind of father.
SPEAKER_01: This third tank over here, this third tank, this is my favorite.
SPEAKER_01: And some of y'all, when I rolled this out, some of y'all thought, oh, they're giving away a grill this morning.
SPEAKER_01: No, we're not.
SPEAKER_01: This is this is my grill, and it's going home with me today because I'm pretty sure that somebody's gonna cook me a steak while I spend Father's Day in my recliner as God intended.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: But that tank has the same power as both of those, same potential as both of those.
SPEAKER_01: Just like every man in this room has the same potential.
SPEAKER_01: You have a God that loves you, you have the word of God, and you have the Holy Spirit living within you.
SPEAKER_01: You have the same potential.
SPEAKER_01: This tank has the same potential as those, but it has these things on it.
SPEAKER_01: These are called regulators, and they control the amount of power coming out of it.
SPEAKER_01: You know, so if I wanna if I want to cook a rare steak, I'm gonna crank this up as high as it'll go, then I'm gonna throw that steak after it's good and hot, I'm gonna throw that steak on the center rack on the searing rack.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna leave it three minutes per side, I'm gonna flip it three minutes the other side, and I'm gonna pull it off, and it's gonna have an almost warm pink center, the way a steak should be.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: If I were gonna fix a well-done steak, which I would never fix a well-done steak, but if I were gonna do that, I'd turn the heat back, I'd play the long game, I'd put it on about eight to ten minutes on one side, then I'd flip it eight to ten minutes on the other side, and I'd make sure the internal temperature was equal to the external temperature and the colors the same throughout.
SPEAKER_01: That would be how to cook a well-done steak, because I can regulate the power coming out of that tank.
SPEAKER_01: I can regulate it.
SPEAKER_01: Man of God that regulates himself, regulates himself according to the truth of God's word and the leading of the Holy Spirit.
SPEAKER_01: And and you may have you may have struggles in your marriage, you may have struggles with your kids, but the way you react is gonna be according to one of these three things.
SPEAKER_01: You're either gonna overreact and you're gonna yell and you're gonna scream and you're gonna bully, or you're gonna you're gonna disengage.
SPEAKER_01: You know, you come home, and nobody's allowed to elbow anybody on this part, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Because sometimes, sometimes, guys, you're gonna come home and your wife will have had a horrible day.
SPEAKER_01: And she's gonna tell you about it before you're out of the car.
SPEAKER_01: She's gonna start telling you.
SPEAKER_01: She's gonna have that look on her face, like, you know, she's about to turn into a monster or something.
SPEAKER_01: She's gonna have that look on her face.
SPEAKER_01: And she's gonna start telling you about everything that happened.
SPEAKER_01: Every time the kids did something wrong, every mess she had to clean up, or anything that went wrong at work, anything all day long, she's gonna tell you about it.
SPEAKER_01: And then somehow, she's gonna say something that spins it to make it sound like it's your fault.
SPEAKER_01: And she's not doing that on purpose.
SPEAKER_01: You know, she didn't come in and say, I'm gonna blame my husband for everything bad that went, you know, that happened today.
SPEAKER_01: But but that happens.
SPEAKER_01: It just happens, you know?
SPEAKER_01: You spin it so that it sounds like it's all your fault.
SPEAKER_01: So you can react and you can use what God has placed within you, you can you can react according to that.
SPEAKER_01: And you can be the flamethrower father, and you can, when she starts talking, you can just you can blow up and you can yell at her and you can let her know how dare you blame me for this.
SPEAKER_01: This is all your fault, and you can say things that make her feel make her feel unimportant.
SPEAKER_01: Or you can, you know, she starts talking, you can just back up, go out of the house, say, good luck with all that, and go into the garage and tinker on your car, or go sit on the ride mower for an hour, and just whatever you do to get away from that so you can't hear it, and you disengage.
SPEAKER_01: But the regulated man, the man that controls all of that, when he hears that, he responds according to the truth of God's word.
SPEAKER_01: He responds according to the truth of God's word.
SPEAKER_01: And when his wife starts, well, his wife starts unleashing because of a frustrating day, instead of instead of reacting and yelling or retreating, he thinks.
SPEAKER_01: 1 John says, He's slow to speak, slow to get angry, and quick to listen, and quick to hear.
SPEAKER_01: That's what he thinks.
SPEAKER_01: As she's unleashing on him, she's she's unroll unraveling everything that happened that day.
SPEAKER_01: He's thinking, I need to listen.
SPEAKER_01: I need to keep my mouth shut and listen.
SPEAKER_01: And and when he thinks, hey, you know what?
SPEAKER_01: I I could have a I could have a better wife, you know, if I if I had a better wife, uh, it would just be, you know, my life would be better.
SPEAKER_01: He stops and remembers Philippians 4, 6.
SPEAKER_01: Be content in everything with prayer and supplication.
SPEAKER_01: You can be grateful for what God has blessed you with.
SPEAKER_01: And it might be hard, but if you show gratitude for it, that gives a different perspective on it.
SPEAKER_01: And when when when he's tempted to look at his wife and say things that are hurtful or things that will make her feel stupid or unimportant, he remembers Colossians chapter 3.
SPEAKER_01: Never say an unkind word to your wife.
SPEAKER_01: That's what the regulated man looks like.
SPEAKER_01: That's what it means.
SPEAKER_01: That's what it means to fear God and follow his ways, even under the toughest of circumstances.
SPEAKER_01: Even when things are hard, when you're when your kids are acting up, when when when uh when when the marriage is hard, when money's hard, whatever it is, you react a certain way because you you fear God and you follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: Then in verse 3 it says, it it's well, it told us in in verse 2 it said that you will you will enjoy the fruit of your labor.
SPEAKER_01: Well, verse 3 tells us what that fruit is.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, look at this verse.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, if you follow God, fear God and follow his ways, your wife will be like a fruitful grapevine flourishing within your home.
SPEAKER_01: Your children will be like vigorous young olive trees as they sit around your table.
SPEAKER_01: That is the Lord's blessing for those who fear him.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, that's the blessing.
SPEAKER_01: Now, this is not a promise of a perfect, perfect home and a perfect marriage right away.
SPEAKER_01: You know, you still have to play the long game, you still have to put in the effort.
SPEAKER_01: But if you if you if you grow to become a man of God, your family is gonna respond to that.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, ladies, let me ask you this.
SPEAKER_01: Wives, how many of you want to be a better wife?
SPEAKER_01: Raise your hand.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, this is not an admission of guilt or anything.
SPEAKER_01: This is just natural.
SPEAKER_01: I want to be a better wife.
SPEAKER_01: You know, I want God to use me.
SPEAKER_01: I want to be a better wife.
SPEAKER_01: That verse just said, Men, be a man of God, fear God, and follow his ways, and your wife will flourish.
SPEAKER_01: You being a man of God will help your wife to be a better woman of God.
SPEAKER_01: It happens naturally.
SPEAKER_01: That's part of God's plan.
SPEAKER_01: You be a man of God and your wife will flourish.
SPEAKER_01: Your kids, your kids, it says they will, they will uh be they will be vigorous like vigorous young olive trees as they sit around your table.
SPEAKER_01: That means they're gonna be strong.
SPEAKER_01: They're gonna stand firm in the faith.
SPEAKER_01: When you stand firm in the faith, your kids are more likely to stand firm in the faith.
SPEAKER_01: And and dads, the more like God you are, the more godly you become, the more you live for Christ, the more your kids are gonna respond to that.
SPEAKER_01: You know, and and the the uh statistics in our culture bear that out.
SPEAKER_01: The number one indicator of everything bad in a kid's life, every negative behavior, every everything that they get into, the number one indicator of that is the presence of the father in the home.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, and I and I could read statistics to you the for the length of this sermon.
SPEAKER_01: I really could, but I don't want to do that to you, so let me just highlight.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what it says Research tells us that when the father is present and involved, kids do better in school.
SPEAKER_01: They do better in school.
SPEAKER_01: The kids are less likely to bully other kids, they're less likely to be victimized by bullies.
SPEAKER_01: That's pretty cool.
SPEAKER_01: The fact that you're involved, dad, you're involved in their life, and you're you're uh you're a man of God, you're involved and present, they're less likely to be bullied.
SPEAKER_01: I think that's pretty awesome.
SPEAKER_01: Uh kids are less prone, uh less prone to mental and emotional health disorders.
SPEAKER_01: Kids are less likely to have behavior problems in school.
SPEAKER_01: Almost without exception, young men in inner cities that join gangs have no father.
SPEAKER_01: They're looking for a father figure.
SPEAKER_01: And and and young men with fathers avoid the gangs.
SPEAKER_01: That's pretty amazing.
SPEAKER_01: Kids are less likely to use drugs when a father is present.
SPEAKER_01: When dad is the spiritual leader of the home, the kids are 98% likely to follow his lead when he is the spiritual leader in the home.
SPEAKER_01: When mom's a spiritual leader, they're 27% likely to follow mom's lead.
SPEAKER_01: Dads, your words and your actions are powerful.
SPEAKER_01: And just by being a man of God, being the man that God calls you to be, being the regulated man, your wife is going to grow, your wife is going to flourish, your kids are going to be strong, and it's worth the effort.
SPEAKER_01: If you're going to bear the fruit, if you're going to enjoy the fruit of your labors, it's worth the effort.
SPEAKER_01: Then it says this look at verse 6.
SPEAKER_01: It says, May you may you live to enjoy uh I'm sorry, look at verse five.
SPEAKER_01: Uh may the Lord continually bless you from Zion, may you see Jerusalem prosper as long as you live.
SPEAKER_01: Godly men strengthen community or strength, strengthen the culture.
SPEAKER_01: They strengthen their families and they strengthen the culture.
SPEAKER_01: The fruit of their labor, according to that verse, is a blessing on the city in which they lived.
SPEAKER_01: And history will tell us that when in a culture when men are strong and families are strong, that culture thrives.
SPEAKER_01: When families are diminished and masculinity is vilified, that culture will fall.
SPEAKER_01: Empires rise on strong men and strong families.
SPEAKER_01: Do you want to make your community better?
SPEAKER_01: Do you want to make your culture better?
SPEAKER_01: Be a man of God.
SPEAKER_01: Verse 6.
SPEAKER_01: May you live to enjoy your grandchildren.
SPEAKER_01: May Israel have peace.
SPEAKER_01: Godly men leave a godly legacy.
SPEAKER_01: Guys, the life that you're living right now is the legacy you will leave for generations.
SPEAKER_01: So think about that.
SPEAKER_01: The life you're living right now.
SPEAKER_01: If God said, today's your last day, I'll see you.
SPEAKER_01: I'll see you in an hour.
SPEAKER_01: Whatever life you're living right now, that's the legacy you leave.
SPEAKER_01: That's it.
SPEAKER_01: You don't get to change it once you're gone.
SPEAKER_01: God willing, we all have lots of years left.
SPEAKER_01: So if the legacy you're leaving right now is the flamethrower father, and your kids remember a hothead who couldn't control his temper and said things that he wish he hadn't said, you got time to change.
SPEAKER_01: If your legacy is the unengaged father, the disconnected father, you got time to change.
SPEAKER_01: You can connect with your family.
SPEAKER_01: You can do that.
SPEAKER_01: And you leave that legacy.
SPEAKER_01: If you're God, follow his way, and you leave a legacy that strengthens generations to come.
SPEAKER_01: The legacy that you leave, man, will not just affect your family, your immediate family.
SPEAKER_01: But it's gonna affect your grandkids.
SPEAKER_01: And your great grandkids.
SPEAKER_01: But it takes a choice that you have to make, man.
SPEAKER_01: You know, I said at the beginning, I said this is not a passive activity.
SPEAKER_01: Fatherhood, manhood, masculinity is not a passive activity.
SPEAKER_01: It takes effort.
SPEAKER_01: It takes you saying, I'm gonna be the man of God that he called me to be.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna do it.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna step up.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna put aside the things that are keeping me from being that.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna put aside the habits and the addictions and the activities and the distractions.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna put all of that aside and I'm gonna focus on being the right man.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna focus on being a man that affects generations, a man that causes my family to grow just by following God.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna make that decision.
SPEAKER_01: So it starts with this.
SPEAKER_01: First, it starts with men deciding, okay, I've been doing it wrong.
SPEAKER_01: I need to repent.
SPEAKER_01: You know, to repent means that you turn 180 degrees.
SPEAKER_01: So if you're going this way with fatherhood, you need to repent, and you turn and go this way towards fatherhood, and this way towards towards the cross, towards Christ, and follow what he has said about what it means to be a father, what it means to be a man of God.
SPEAKER_01: It starts with repentance.
SPEAKER_01: You tell God, I was wrong, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01: I repent of that sin.
SPEAKER_01: Then you look at your wife and you say, I haven't been the man God called me to be.
SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna change.
SPEAKER_01: I've already talked to God, I've repented, and I'm gonna turn, I'm gonna do it the other way.
SPEAKER_01: I need your support, I need your help, and ladies, man, you have no idea how powerful your words are to your husband.
SPEAKER_01: When he makes that decision, you look at him and you go, Go get him, tiger.
SPEAKER_01: You know?
SPEAKER_01: And he'll be like.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, because your words are that powerful.
SPEAKER_01: And if you say things to discourage him, when he makes those decisions, he's gonna say, whatever.
SPEAKER_01: But if you say words to encourage him, he's gonna move forward.
SPEAKER_01: You pray for him, he's gonna move forward.
SPEAKER_01: The best thing you can do is use your words to strengthen your husband and to encourage him to do the right thing.
SPEAKER_01: When he, you know, I saw a pastor one time say that men are men are just like puppies, you know.
SPEAKER_01: You get a puppy to go on the paper and you go, Oh, you're such a good boy.
SPEAKER_01: You know, your husband will respond to that.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, so your husband's never prayed publicly before, but suddenly he gets your family together at dinner time and he says, Okay, I'm gonna pray tonight.
SPEAKER_01: He says a prayer and it's it's awkward and incoherent or whatever.
SPEAKER_01: You look at him and you go, Oh, you're such a good boy.
SPEAKER_01: And that's gonna encourage him.
SPEAKER_01: Your words are powerful.
SPEAKER_01: Kids, kids, tell your dad how awesome he is.
SPEAKER_01: When he's leading you, when he makes that decision, you know, because guys, if you make that decision, you repent, you tell God, I'm sorry, and you look at your wife and you say, I'm sorry, then you look at your kids and say, I haven't been being the dad that God wants me to be, and I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01: And and I'm gonna I'm gonna change, I'm gonna do what God's word says.
SPEAKER_01: That's where it starts.
SPEAKER_01: It starts with repentance, vertically and horizontally.
SPEAKER_01: And then you can't follow his ways apart from being a man of God's word.
SPEAKER_01: And and maybe you've never been been one to get into it, maybe you've never never uh uh had a had a routine of reading God's word daily or whatever, you've never been in a men's Bible study.
SPEAKER_01: There is no reason to continue down that road.
SPEAKER_01: So you go home today and you start.
SPEAKER_01: Now don't go to Genesis 1-1 and think, okay, I'm gonna read all the way through the scriptures because you're gonna get to Leviticus and you're gonna go, what?
SPEAKER_01: And you're gonna stop.
SPEAKER_01: That's just the way it is.
SPEAKER_01: I do that.
SPEAKER_01: I get to Leviticus and I'm like, seriously?
SPEAKER_01: This is hard, you know?
SPEAKER_01: So here's what I want you to do.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to start today is June 21st.
SPEAKER_01: So I want you to open to Proverbs 21.
SPEAKER_01: And I want you to read Proverbs 21.
SPEAKER_01: Tomorrow is June 22nd.
SPEAKER_01: Open to Proverbs 22.
SPEAKER_01: Read Proverbs 22, and continue that every day for a month.
SPEAKER_01: Just start there.
SPEAKER_01: There's so much stuff in there, just wisdom about how to live, what you should do as a man, all these things.
SPEAKER_01: Just start there.
SPEAKER_01: And as you're reading, as you're reading, make a note.
SPEAKER_01: Say, okay, here's what I'm gonna change in my life today.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible said, do this, I'm gonna start doing that.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna start doing that.
SPEAKER_01: Write it down and make the commitment to change.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, guys, you're not gonna be successful at Bible study on your own.
SPEAKER_01: You gotta get involved with a group of guys.
SPEAKER_01: And if you want to do that, come see me afterwards, I'll help you find one.
SPEAKER_01: It's that important.
SPEAKER_01: Because you need men around you, you know, you just like you need a wife that's encouraging, you need men around you.
SPEAKER_01: And if you're a single man, you need men around you more than, even more than the married men do.
SPEAKER_01: You need men around you that are gonna encourage you, that are gonna that are gonna tell you when you're being a knucklehead.
SPEAKER_01: You need guys that are honest enough to say, yeah, that wasn't a good idea.
SPEAKER_01: Some of the best conversations I've had with the men closest to me is when they look at me and go, What were you thinking?
SPEAKER_01: You know, we all need guys like that in our life.
SPEAKER_01: We need guys that are gonna encourage us when we make that decision to repent and start going the right way.
SPEAKER_01: We need guys that are behind us cheering us on.
SPEAKER_01: So you need to make those changes in your life.
SPEAKER_01: You want to become the man of God that he's called you to be, those are those are non-negotiables.
SPEAKER_01: You need to prioritize church.
SPEAKER_01: You need to prioritize church because everything you're learning from God's word, you get to put into practice in God's church.
SPEAKER_01: And you're doing that with a bunch of other people that are putting it in practice, putting it into practice in God's church, and we can learn from each other.
SPEAKER_01: And then once then eventually you'll feel like, hey, I understand this.
SPEAKER_01: Then you can put those things into practice in the world.
SPEAKER_01: You can have an impact on people around you that don't know Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: It's got to prioritize church.
SPEAKER_01: But none of that means anything apart from a relationship with Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: So if you're here today and you've never accepted Christ as your Savior, it has to start there.
SPEAKER_01: Has to start there.
SPEAKER_01: No amount of Bible study or fellowship or church attendance, nothing, nothing is going to change your life, transform your life until your life has been transformed by Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: And he did that when he was crucified, buried, and rose again.
SPEAKER_01: He made it possible for you to go to heaven.
SPEAKER_01: He is the way, the truth, and the life.
SPEAKER_01: No one comes to the Father except through Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: Bible's really clear about that.
SPEAKER_01: He is not one of many ways, he is the way.
SPEAKER_01: And he is not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
SPEAKER_01: So if you're sitting in here today and you're thinking, oh, that's not for me, it's for you.
SPEAKER_01: Because he said, I'm not willing that anyone should perish.
SPEAKER_01: Hell's not an option for anyone.
SPEAKER_01: All they have to do is accept Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: All you have to do is accept him.
SPEAKER_01: So if you're here today, you've never accepted Christ, it's as simple as just telling him, I want to put my faith in you.
SPEAKER_01: I trust in your death, burial, and resurrection for my salvation.
SPEAKER_01: I trust in your shed blood for the forgiveness of my sin, and I choose to follow Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: And you just talk to him and tell him that.
SPEAKER_01: Now you can say that to him any way you want, but if you're struggling to put that into words, what's going on in your heart and your mind, you're struggling to put that into words, you can just pray something like this.
SPEAKER_01: And let's do this with every head bowed and every eye closed.
SPEAKER_01: If you want to accept Christ today, you just pray something like this and say, Dear God, thank you for sending Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: Because on my own, I could, I could never earn, I could never earn salvation.
SPEAKER_01: I could never earn a place in heaven.
SPEAKER_01: I could never earn eternal life.
SPEAKER_01: And I know that Jesus paid that price for me so that I can have eternal life.
SPEAKER_01: So today I trust in his death, his burial, and his resurrection for my salvation.
SPEAKER_01: I trust in his shed blood for the forgiveness of my sin.
SPEAKER_01: And today I choose to accept Christ.
SPEAKER_01: So if you just prayed that for the first time, you've never prayed that before, and you just prayed that.
SPEAKER_01: And it's not about repeating a prayer, it's about meaning what we just said.
SPEAKER_01: But if you prayed that, lift your hand for me so I can pray for you.
SPEAKER_01: All right.
SPEAKER_01: God, I pray for these that lifted their hands.
SPEAKER_01: Lord, I pray for those that just now accepted Christ.
SPEAKER_01: Lord, I pray that you would bless them, help them understand the decisions that they've made.
SPEAKER_01: I pray that your Holy Spirit would just do a great work within them as they start on this new life following Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: Now, if you're a father, you're a you're a man, and you're here today, and you think, I need, I'm that guy, I'm the guy that needs to turn, and I need to become the regulated man.
SPEAKER_01: I need to follow Christ.
SPEAKER_01: I need to, I need to fear God and follow his ways.
SPEAKER_01: If that's you and you need prayer, you want to make that commitment today, just lift your hands so I can pray for you.
SPEAKER_01: Hands going up everywhere.
SPEAKER_01: Hands going up all over the place.
SPEAKER_01: Men that want to be that guy.
SPEAKER_01: Keep your hands up.
SPEAKER_01: Let me pray for you.
SPEAKER_01: All right.
SPEAKER_01: God, thank you for these men that have made that choice and say, I'm gonna do things different.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be the man that God called me to be, the man he created me to be, so that I can lead my family well, I can lead by example, I can lead actively and choose to be their leader, choose to be their protector.
SPEAKER_01: God, I pray that you would just bless him, Lord, but surround him with other men that will encourage him.
SPEAKER_01: Lord, help him to understand the truth of your word, help him to prioritize getting in your word, help him to prioritize church, Lord, knowing that those are necessary if he's going to grow as a believer.
SPEAKER_01: God, thank you for the dads in this room.
SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for all these folks.
SPEAKER_01: Lord, I pray that you would just bless dads here, Lord.
SPEAKER_01: Help them to stand up for you, help them to be men of God in their homes.
SPEAKER_01: And Lord, we ask all of this in Jesus' name.
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening to Family Church's Sermon of the Week.
SPEAKER_00: We pray this message encouraged you and helped you grow in your faith.
SPEAKER_00: If it blessed you, share it with a friend and follow so you never miss a new episode.
SPEAKER_00: You can learn more about Family Church at myfamilychurch.com.
SPEAKER_00: If you are in the area, join us on Sunday mornings at 10 a.m.
SPEAKER_00: We meet at Patriot High School 10504 Kittle Run Drive.