Atomic Blonde - I'll Give You One Hint: Domino Theory

Today, the boys take a look at Charlize Theron's spectacular Cold War thriller, Atomic Blonde--the ONLY movie where you can get a stunning 1980s soundtrack, John Goodman in a suit and a verifiable chorus of Eastern European dudes getting whacked in their Lyndon B Johnsons with firehoses.

What part of the body is "Lyndon B Johnson" a metaphor for? You'll have to listen to find out, dear listener. You'll have to listen.

But if you thought "nards," you're right. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_05 0:00

Knock knock motherfuckers. Craig's here.

SPEAKER_03 0:03

Here comes Craig is the name of our Denzel Washington as a serial killer movie.

SPEAKER_05 0:10

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 0:12

His character's name is Craig, and when he breaks into your house, he says, Here comes Craig, and he chases you. He chases you.

SPEAKER_05 0:20

That's the movie so far. This is the cop pursuing him. Liam Hemsworth?

SPEAKER_03 0:24

Liam. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 0:28

Yeah. This is just one of those rare moments where Liam Hemsworth will touch greatness. Alright, fuck. Here we go. Did you like John Wick, but thought it could be just a little bit better if it were about a very attractive woman having a fight inside a really nice Home Depot. Not one of the normal Home Depots, but one of the nice ones where everything seems very well organized and the staff is helpful and they always put up their Christmas display early. Welcome to Slop Culture. Today we're talking about Atomic Blonde starring Charlize Theron. Hello and welcome to Slop Culture, the Happy Hour podcast where we strive to see the beauty in stupidity. I am your host, Sam Sykes, and with me as always, a man who dared to take the controversial stance to say that another sentient human being should be allowed to wed a horse so long as the horse and the human were from the same ethnicity. Now I disagreed with that, but uh goddammit. What would compel you to say such a thing uh at such a pivotal time in our nation's history?

SPEAKER_05 1:47

Oh fuck. For the record, I do not endorse this.

SPEAKER_03 1:54

Which part? Which part? Do you do you can only you can you have to endorse one of those?

SPEAKER_05 2:00

Well that shit, okay.

SPEAKER_03 2:02

Uh do you endorse the horse intercourse or do you endorse the horse racism discourse?

SPEAKER_05 2:10

Uh okay, is the racism just among people, or can we just be racist to horses? I feel like we already are racist to horses. I'm quite a bit of a good thing.

SPEAKER_03 2:18

We are definitely racist.

SPEAKER_05 2:20

What's your favorite subgenre of horse?

SPEAKER_03 2:23

What do you mean subgenre?

SPEAKER_05 2:25

I don't want to say race now because it would be uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_03 2:28

You know, like Clydesdales or yeah, I don't I don't actually know much about the breeds, but I think those really big horses with the shaggy hooves. Yeah, I think those are Clydesdales. Yeah, yeah. I think that's uh those are the ones that are associated with Bud wiser beer, right? Yeah, yeah. I like those. I think those are very cool. My intent my intent with that was to like give you uh an opinion that would like offend everybody. Everyone, I know. But like on on different layers, like like it would offend people who were both did not believe a person and a horse should marry, and people who believe in equality between all ethnicities.

SPEAKER_05 3:08

Yeah, that's like shooting me in the kneecaps and then running me over with like a bulldozer.

SPEAKER_03 3:14

That's so unnecessary. It feels like I need there's gotta be like some extremely petty third step where like I put in I put like a caution like wet floor around around your yeah well you draw the chalk outline but you give me a tiny dick. Or like I I look into the camera, or like I say, someone get someone better get a mop. And then I look at the camera and I say, Cause this man's a mess. Jesus Christ, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 3:47

And the Looney Tunes like circles come in to like, right?

SPEAKER_03 3:52

So like we're envisioning like a duck amok situation here essentially, yeah. Okay. Fuck, we're we're getting deep already. Um that said, I was hoping you might want to do a little banter. Uh sure.

SPEAKER_05 4:04

Just just a little just a little pre a little pre-show banter, a little warm-up. Um, hit me with the banter. You said you'd been playing uh Deep Rock Gallip.

SPEAKER_03 4:12

I've been playing Deep Rock Galactic Survivor, and it's one of the it's a roguelike where you where you you know gain different power-ups and it it I I love these games, and part of me is ashamed of that because it seems very simian, you know, like get get different colors and things do better, you know? Like yeah, I'm looking at screenshots right now. Yeah, like like total Pavlovian response. Like oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 4:41

I mean a lot of the games are like that though, it's just how you get that drip feed. Yeah. Right?

SPEAKER_03 4:46

Yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_05 4:47

I guess. Um that's not say all of them are, but it is at least an aspect of a lot of them. It's not the only thing, though. Like, can you get for your dwarf?

SPEAKER_03 4:55

Yeah, well, yeah, you could you you can you can upgrade your dwarf in many and you get your choice between four dwarves, four kinds of dwarves. I didn't know there were races of dwarfs. What's your favorite race, Sam? No, no, not races, not races, not races. I said four different kinds of dwarves. That could mean a lot of things. As it happens, like a cast they all no, they all have different uh uh different employment in uh in their management. Like it my my I'm I'm I'm kind of osmosing the lore here, but my impression is that these are dwarves who work for a mining company where they mine planets full of dangerous creatures.

SPEAKER_05 5:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 5:35

And that's a cool idea, yeah. There are four there are four different uh I guess you could call them contractors, employees. I don't know. Um character classes, yeah, yeah, the classes, but like also the social classes. I don't know, like there there is some like social commentary, like you're you're constantly chattered to by someone in your head, like reminding you how expendable you are, and how you're only going to be rewarded with beer and sandwiches if you do well with for the company.

unknown 6:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:09

Uh and then like if you succeed, that you know it'll tell you that management is pleased. So my my impression is that the dwarves are kind of undervalued labor in a in a exploitative capitalist system, but they are either at peace with it or they don't know it, or they do know it, and yet are compelled to dig anyway. Yeah, they're not compelled to dig. They might be just like they might be compelled to dig, you know? Shit. I'm sorry, that came out.

SPEAKER_05 6:41

You're good, you're good. I've I must admit to having played the the original like Deep Rock Galactic a couple times. Yes. Quite drunk for both of those, but I do remember really enjoying the terrain deformation and destruction. Extremely freeform. Really, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:56

Like like it it it the game has earned its accolades. But uh fuck. We could talk about dwarves all day, but we can't because we're here to talk about Atomic Blonde.

SPEAKER_05 7:05

There really weren't any dwarves in Atomic Blonde.

SPEAKER_03 7:08

There were no dwarves in Atomic Blonde, despite this taking place in Cold War Berlin.

SPEAKER_05 7:15

Known for its dwarves.

SPEAKER_03 7:16

Known for its dwarves. That's where Snow White and the seven dwarves came from at that time, and never before. Sure. It was like a gritty spy tale. It was a gritty spy tale that Walt Disney later said, hang on a bit. Why I tick you why I tick him.

SPEAKER_05 7:43

Wait, but what accent does Walt Disney have now?

SPEAKER_03 7:47

I I I guess I'm kind of envisioning him as like kind of a freewheeling cockney at this point.

SPEAKER_05 7:52

Like, hello, hello, hello, what's this? He's got like a wagon with a bunch of treasures in it he wants to show you.

SPEAKER_03 7:58

He's just like he's just like scavenging whatever and turning it into fucking animation. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 8:06

Well, those hand drawn animations did slap.

SPEAKER_03 8:09

But and in a way, if you were to say Snow White and the Seven Dwarves was about a spy taking care of several snitches, that might actually not be too far from the plot of this movie.

SPEAKER_05 8:22

Okay, I can Okay, sure, yeah, I can see where you're yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:25

Do you do you agree? Do you agree? Like In some ways, I guess. This was a very like, first of all, we're trying to talk a lot of shit because honestly, we both really, really enjoyed this movie and we weren't expecting to. And we both know it's not quite as fun to talk about movies that were well executed and very careful. Like, like, like we definitely have more fun when the movie's a fucking sloppy amess, a la Samurai cop. But this is a podcast, a happy hour podcast, about action movies, and this is one fucking hell of an action movie. Like, this is possibly one of my most favorite action movies, and I've only seen it like four hours ago. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 9:16

Well, so uh before we get into all the glorious details. Well, we're not known for doing uh recaps.

SPEAKER_03 9:23

You might even say we're not in the business of doing our recaps. You might say we just don't offer that service. That said, we do offer an artistic interpretation of the events we have just seen, and we try to make it fit in two minutes or less. Now, since I recommended this movie, it falls to Will to have to try to recapture this uh thrilling spy, Cold War spy thriller. This is gonna be the within two minutes. And we wish him we wish him luck. Will in three, two, one, go.

SPEAKER_05 10:07

Okay, a uh spy gets murdered in Cold War Berlin. Shocker. Um, but it turns out he uh had picked up this uh list that was hidden inside a watch that has uh the names of all the undercover agents from I guess the Soviet Union, um or maybe just everybody's, I forget. Um but it also has the identity of a notorious double agent named Satchel. Now we cut to uh ten days later in London, uh Charlie's Theron plays Lorraine, who is our main character. She's getting debriefed, uh by MI6 and John Goodman, who works for the CIA, about what uh happened in Berlin over the past ten days. That is the primary plot line of the movie. She goes to Berlin, meets up with her contact, played by James McAvoy, his codename is Percival. He's extremely shady and obviously untrustworthy, but um at the same time, she's one of her he's one of her only resources to get more information on where she can find a list. Uh she works with Delphine, who's a young French spy, um, who ends up getting murdered after they have uh a very torrid romance. Uh torrids. One minute left. Holy shit. I'm crushing it right now. So um she and Delphine have a like a really nice uh romance that we'll discuss further later, but Delphine is killed ultimately by Percival. Um throughout the film, there's a kind of like a dual plot line going where they're trying to get the watch, and also the guy who initially put all the data or the list in the watch uh because he memorized the whole list. Um he ends up getting killed, um, which is uh sad. It's a huge bummer. But um Lorraine ends up uh being able to get the watch from Percival, who himself was a double agent. Um she kills Percival after he kills Delphine, then she goes to turn over the watch to the Russians because she was satchel the whole time, but then it turns out she was a triple agent for the US, and she murks the Russians, takes the watch, and gives it to John Goodman. Um thus kind of tying a bow on the plot. Um I think I got all the main beats there. Yeah. Sure, at least a couple things.

SPEAKER_03 12:00

Yeah, no, with with seven with seven seconds to spare.

SPEAKER_01 12:03

Woo!

SPEAKER_03 12:04

Well done. All right, two things before before we talk about the movie. Two things you just said that I really liked.

SPEAKER_01 12:10

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 12:11

Uh I really liked that you mentioned you only mentioned John Goodman at the end. So it it it sounds like at the end of this movie a super spy is handing over a watch to John to John Goodman, the actor. Yeah. Okay. What do you want me to do with this? About this. No, John Goodman was playing as a CIA agent, and he's he's great at it. Um and two, I love that you described um the passionate romance uh between between two hardened women uh that ultimately ends with one of them being killed. I like that you described that as nice. I mean, I was like floundering after calling it shit. I have to you're really you're really putting a positive spin on this. It makes it sound like you're trying so hard to be not judgmental that like you're because you're worried about someone accusing you of being close-minded. It was nice. These two ladies, um well, they had a nice little thing. Uh one of one of them did get murdered.

SPEAKER_05 13:23

Yeah, cuts between them like pointing guns at each other and like one of them James McAvoy.

SPEAKER_03 13:28

And yes, there was a moment when one of them confessed that she doesn't have feelings anymore. But they're very nice, they're a nice young couple, and I would I was rooting for them. I I would ask them to babysit my child. It was nice. I'm sorry, I'm I'm I'm I'm painting you as a very specific type of person that I noticed. Um but I do want to talk about this movie specifically. I want to talk, as you said, this is a spy thriller, and our lead spy is played is uh played by John. I'm sorry, do you do you remember do you remember the character name? Lorraine, I want to say Broughton, but Lorraine Yeah, Lorraine Broughton, Lorraine Broughton, I believe, and she is played by Charlize Therome. And you know that uh on this podcast we typically dedicate the first uh segment to talking about uh the lead. And this is also where we tend to wax poetic and fart off a little bit about what uh what makes an action hero. And I'm happy we get to do that today because we're talking about Charlize Therone, who I feel is an action hero, is a bona fide action hero, and who I believe does not immediately come to mind when you think of action hero. Do you agree or disagree? You I would tend to agree. Ooh, we're coming in fucking hot today. Sorry, I I have a glass of uh scotch here. Uh we we we do try to encourage a responsible intoxication at a happy hour podcast, but I'm sorry, I took a I took a particularly diff squig in a mean scotch, it kind of chall it kind of channeled like a little uh fucking 1776 energy in me world about to accuse you of infringing on my molasses profit margins on my shipping company, you s you you you you blaggard. Do you think Blackguard was like a really like can you imagine someone getting very offended at being called a blaggard?

SPEAKER_05 15:46

Sure, people got offended at all sorts of whack shit back in the day. They were just itching for a chance to duel a motherfucker. There's not a lot to do except it was like, yeah, this Tuesday wanna get gut shot by like a 60 caliber. No, I don't want to fucking Jesus like play with a hoop or something.

SPEAKER_03 16:01

Does it feel like the n the amount of names of bad names to call people like kind of stays consistent throughout time? Like as as new ways as new slurs to call people come in, like old slurs. So it's kind of very stable. Do you feel that as well? Oh, certainly, yeah. Jesus, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We're talking about Charlie's theron. Um well, she's from South Africa, so I mean well, wonderful.

SPEAKER_05 16:28

That's wait, how is that related? I mean, I was just like I was searching for something where it's like, wait, someplace where they're known historically for having some pretty bad ways to refer to people.

SPEAKER_03 16:38

Oh okay, all right. All right, you you rap scallion, you're gonna taint the taint the discussion before it even happens.

SPEAKER_05 16:47

Yeah, no, I love Charlie's They're on. I think we both do, but it is a good observation that like she doesn't immediately come to mind as an action hero. She comes to mind as a talent, obviously, a draw for like one of those rare stars who it's like, I'll see the movie because she's in it, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's also very hot.

SPEAKER_03 17:03

Yeah, I mean, yes, like legitimately beautiful. Um, and like, what am I trying to say? Yes, like I agree with you about everything. Absolutely beautiful, clearly a talent. We're not uh implying anything about her talent except that it's fucking great. Like she's been in a number of hits, a number of very challenging movies, yeah uh and of you know, very challenging roles, uh excuse me.

SPEAKER_05 17:30

And across the spectrum of uh different genres, too.

SPEAKER_03 17:34

Yes, and uh one of those is that she has been in an awful lot of action movies, yeah. A shit ton. Like way more than you'd think. Way more than you'd think. Uh she's been, you know, Atomic Blonde is definitely kind of her opus. Uh because she's uh she's a amazing Fury Road 2, though.

SPEAKER_05 17:52

I mean, you haven't seen Fury Road.

SPEAKER_03 17:53

Well, no, that's true. I'm sorry, that's true. Fury Road is probably what she's better known as. Fury Road's a heater. Um uh fast and furious movies. Three of the Fast and Furious. She's in that old guard series on Netflix where she plays like she plays like a war god. We'll definitely visit one of those because that is absolutely what this what this podcast was made for. That specific type of garbage. We'll put that on the list for sure. That sugary, sweet, straight to streaming piece filth. I'm sorry, I'm getting I'm getting quite rowdy.

SPEAKER_05 18:25

Oh no, this is interesting. Just I was skimming her Wikipedia, but she's inspired by actresses Susan Sarandon and Sigurney Weaver, and I can for sure see some Sigurney Weaver energy.

SPEAKER_03 18:34

Yeah, right. Yeah, kind of a proud tr and you know, I I swear I'm trying to be sensitive when I say this, but a proud tradition of pointy, intense women. I feel you, yeah. You like I mean that sincerely, but like a lot of pointy energy, a lot of a lot of very like a lot of like down the center of your nose intensity. You know what I mean? Sure. Yeah. Like I'm thinking of Sigurney Weaver primarily an alien, because that's just you know my favorite.

SPEAKER_05 19:03

I mean that's two different at both times, too, you know.

SPEAKER_03 19:08

Well, yeah, but like in both, she's a survivor, you know. She's trying to escape the situation.

SPEAKER_05 19:13

So and then in the second one, she's like, nah, let me head back real quick to save this kid. And she fucking straps a flamethrower onto a machine gun with a grenade launcher and is just fucking holding the kid with one hand while she Oh, that shit was so cool. You can tell I like aliens. Get away from her, you bitch, right? Oh fuck.

SPEAKER_03 19:30

I've I've liked Sigurney Weaver in pretty much everything I've seen her in.

SPEAKER_05 19:34

Uh that's part of Avatar.

SPEAKER_03 19:37

Yeah. I and like one of the few parts of Avatar I remember. I remember Sigurney Weaver, and I remember you like have spiritual sex with a bird, and that's how you make it do what you want to do.

SPEAKER_05 19:52

And a horse, too.

SPEAKER_03 19:53

Yeah, and like you you you kind of you kind of make love to the planet.

SPEAKER_05 20:00

Uh oh. James Cameron's ultimate fantasy.

SPEAKER_03 20:04

I feel like well, you know what? Like there's worse things to want to make love to. Like, that is new though. I don't think they do that on uh DeviantArt. Top five worst things to make love to that are funny, not dark. Top five worst things to make fun of that area.

SPEAKER_05 20:18

No, to make love to that are funny, not dark. Alright, well, um thinking like a like a moving wagon wheel, right? A butter churn.

SPEAKER_03 20:29

The wagon wheel is funny because I feel like you imagine putting your business in the little spoke. But for some reason, I imagine like clinging to its side and humping it and like rolling, rolling, rolling with it like downhill. And like that's that's how it works when you when you make love to a wagon wheel. Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 20:52

And that was the last time the town sold, Sam. Rolling out of town on that damn wagon wheel.

SPEAKER_01 20:57

That's how old wheelfucker Jones got his name.

SPEAKER_03 21:02

And ever since this has been known as wagon wheel fucker sculpt.

SPEAKER_05 21:08

That's a real American tall tale for all you think.

SPEAKER_03 21:11

That's a real American. If it doesn't involve having sex with some inanimate object, it's not a real American tale. So just remember that. Alright, other other worst uh no, no, no, we don't talk about to talk about Charlie's thermo. We have a we have a duty, we agreed to make this podcast for a reason.

SPEAKER_05 21:35

We were last talking about, I believe, pointy energy. Uh yeah, well, you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 21:38

I know what you like, but also uh I went into this movie as I so often do. Uh oh. I'm I'm not ready to come back to wheelfucker Jones yet.

SPEAKER_04 21:52

As you so often do.

SPEAKER_03 21:55

As I so often do, get lured back into wheelfucker. Stop. Stop it. Alright, alright. Knock it off. It is not the time to be making elaborate relationship plots around wheelfucker Jones. A guy who fucks wagon wheels. So I s asked myself before going into this movie, as I did so many other times with in other episodes, what makes a Charlize Therone action film what makes her what makes her act what is her brand? What is her signature? What is her Jean-Claude Van Damme high kick? What is her Schwarzenegger uh Stone Cold Delivery? What is her what is her theory? Don't go ahead. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_05 22:43

Just going 110 per fucking percent. Like she goes so fucking hard in her action.

SPEAKER_03 22:49

I don't disagree. She's got she she does not know any other way to approach a role, and it's to her fucking credit. Oh sure. Like she and in a weird way that actually might work against her as an action hero.

SPEAKER_05 23:02

Because like you wince when she gets fucking hit. You know, when Arnold's getting hit in like commando and predator, it's a little different, but in commando, it's like, okay, you know, it'll be okay when Charlie's takes a hit, she fucking like sends it.

SPEAKER_03 23:14

Yeah, yeah. See, that's the thing, is like in a lot of uh yeah, and you know, like the rundown and in a lot of the action movie Greats, there's kind of this layer of I don't know what you want, like plot armor almost. Not plot armor, but you know, like a layer of separation between the actor and a character where it's kind of like and you know when taken out of uh when taken to an extreme, it can end up like Marvel, where it's kind of like winking at the audience, you know. But like a lot of uh but you know it's it's it's are it's a layer of disbelievability that makes you believe that one person can accomplish all this, you know? Yeah, they have an increased like tankiness. Yeah, whereas I think Charlie's Theron approaches everything like she throws herself into the role so much.

SPEAKER_05 24:04

She probably actually gets pretty hurt in a lot of these.

SPEAKER_03 24:06

Yeah, well, her fucking stunt work was fucking amazing. But uh this is what I ultimately arrived on, and I think Sagurney Weaver energy feeds very well into this because I think Charlie's Theron occupies this really interesting crossroads between high style, high concept, high like you know, genre stuff, like super stylistic, art almost artistic, like you know, like vibes, combining that with like extremely real consequences to like both physically and emotionally. Like this movie features her in so many like it has this real James Bond. Like, I'll give you a perfect example. Okay, she she arrives from London in Berlin, and she gets picked up uh by people who have been sent to pick her up, and she finds out later that they are actually not people sent to pick her up.

SPEAKER_05 25:07

Later, meaning like one minute later, she's gonna be able to get it. Yeah, one minute later, raw.

SPEAKER_03 25:11

When she's picked up, she's wearing this gorgeous fucking outfit, like this super fucking cool sweater, like total 80s aesthetic. And then when she's in the uh car and she realizes something's up, she takes off this beautiful red heel and then fucking shanks a dude with it. And not just like like I don't mean like she killed the shit out of that guy one stab and then she's done. No, she stabbed the shit out of him, and then she starts fucking wrestling with the driver and fucking forcing him to empty his gun, and she's fucking struggling. And you know, we'll talk about the combat in more depth uh in a bit, but like that's something that she does extremely well in this movie is she does not throw guys around easily. She goes for their knees, she goes for their uh eyes and throats. She kicks a lot of people in the nuts. She kicks a lot of people in the nuts, and everyone sells it completely well.

SPEAKER_05 26:09

You're like, yes, I completely believe that this was a guy in the nuts with a hose at one point.

SPEAKER_03 26:16

She whips a guy in the nut with a hose and then chokes him out after having whipped him in the nuts.

SPEAKER_05 26:21

And then uses him as like a linchpin so she can repel down the side of a building.

SPEAKER_03 26:25

Yeah, no, it it fucking rules, but that's where she lies as an actor.

SPEAKER_05 26:31

She has these really intense uh after she does that repelling move. You know, she doesn't just land in like a superhero landing. No, she like fumbles the landing a little bit, goes flying into like a closed door, smashes into it, and lands on the ground, and then has to pick herself up.

SPEAKER_03 26:47

She's like, fumbles, and then she like pulls herself up and she's like, oh fuck.

SPEAKER_05 26:51

It's like that's how it would go in real life, you know.

SPEAKER_03 26:53

And she still looks great, you know?

SPEAKER_05 26:55

Oh yeah. She looks great, but you also like get pulled into the role a little more. It's like, oh shit, like she's actually at risk of getting severely fucked up in all these fights. And then she takes hits.

SPEAKER_03 27:05

Yeah, yeah. But then in like the next scene, she goes to uh an East Berlin bar and it's fucking moody lighting, and she's dressed up real nice, and there's all this coy dialogue between her and another agent, like and it's it's all just dripping with uh style, you know. Like, you know, this fucking podcast loves this word pageantry, visual language, uh, all the shit that like tells you without telling you what this this fucking uh movie is all about. And it like this movie fucking tells you like right off the fucking bat what it's all about. Like it's it opens with a guy getting gunned down in his bathroom.

SPEAKER_05 27:49

Well, he gets hit by a car like twice and then shot in the head after exchanging one-liners with the guy who's about to kill him. That's awesome.

SPEAKER_03 27:56

He's fucking great. Like it's it's it's the action is so stylish and so fucking cool. Uh but and anyways, this is what Charlize Theron does, because you know, like in uh Fury Road, there was also like a pretty horrifying setting with like some pretty intense personality, pretty gnarly implications in that one. Yeah, some pretty gnarly implications. Uh and but it was also like highly stylish, like there was a way it had an enormous visual.

SPEAKER_05 28:25

There's a character called the Doof Warrior who like plays a like a flamethrower guitar on a car that's like covered in speakers. It's fucking sweet.

SPEAKER_03 28:32

Was Nicholas Holt in Fury Road? Let me check. I think so. I shouldn't have asked. I I I'm breaking up the flow. I'm breaking up the precious flow. Yes, he was.

SPEAKER_05 28:44

Yeah, you did break up the precious flow. Good for him. I'm sorry. Shit in the middle of that river.

SPEAKER_03 28:50

Shit in the middle.

SPEAKER_05 28:51

That was all the monks downstream are trying to make fucking wine using that water, and now you've caused a problem. Right. Just like in London in the 1500s.

SPEAKER_03 29:03

I feel like you're accusing me of fucking poisoning an abbey.

SPEAKER_05 29:08

Not on not on purpose, but also it would be the people who also bought wine there. So it wouldn't just be the Abbey.

SPEAKER_03 29:15

So I'm fucking I'm inadvertently fucking like just by shitting in a river. Alright, shit. God, you've almost got me you've got me on the edge of this rabbit hole, but no, I'm I'm not gonna fall for it. I feel like I like I feel like I've said what I want to say on Shirley's Thereon. Do you agree with me on this? You sack of shit.

SPEAKER_05 29:40

Yeah, I mean, fuck. She is, like I said earlier, she's one of those like rare, I guess these days, rarer these days, like stars, like Capital S, you know, where you see them where you see that they're in a movie and you are like a certain percentage, like I'd say 15% on average, depending on the star, but 15% more likely to see the movie just because they're in it.

SPEAKER_03 30:01

Yeah, you know, like name recognition, I guess you could say.

SPEAKER_05 30:05

And like not just that, but performance recognition, too. You know, like I can recognize track track record.

SPEAKER_03 30:10

Right, yeah, like like Charlie's Thron has been in a couple of stinkers, but Charlie's Thron has never really been a stinker element, you know? Like, even in a stinker, uh, you're pretty much in a turd. Yeah, yeah. Right. I mean, yeah, that actually does describe a couple of actors.

SPEAKER_06 30:28

Uh do you see the diamond? Do you see the diamond?

SPEAKER_03 30:33

Have you seen Blood Diamond? No, I haven't. Is that was that a Werner Hertz? I thought you were just gonna do that.

SPEAKER_05 30:39

That was not a Werner Hertzog.

SPEAKER_06 30:40

Uh I thought you were gonna join Do you see the diamond in the world?

SPEAKER_05 30:45

That would have been a very different fucking movie.

SPEAKER_06 30:47

Oh, it came from your rear end. It contains within it great value.

unknown 30:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 30:56

It should be a means. It should be a means, an incentive to look within yourself and see if your own doo-doo holds within it diamonds.

SPEAKER_03 31:10

I'm sorry, I th I feel like I was getting a little New York by the end there.

SPEAKER_05 31:13

No, no, you're good. But I don't know if you ever used Cameo for anything. If Werner's on it, I'll get a bit from him. Because the one time I used it, I got uh Butterbean to make a like threatening inspirational speech for one of my friends. Um and uh not only did Butterbean fucking nail the speech and everything, but there's a feature on Cameo where you can like pay extra to like have it expedited so you'll get it within like one week instead of two. I didn't pay that because it wasn't like super time sensitive. I was just hoping that Butterbean would like say something, and he went above and beyond, man. He got back to me like within like nine hours on a Sunday, nailed the fucking like I Butterbean said I am the Alpha and the Omega. Like like great lot, because I suggested some lines to it.

SPEAKER_03 31:55

I really hope we get a really like angry email from someone accusing us of shilling for either cameo or butterbean. I am shilling for Butterbean. Shilling for you endorse all that Butterbean creates. I mean, I don't I don't know if he made a really aggressive shirt that like was pretty angry, but kind of non-specific. Like if he just made a shirt that said arrest them all, uh would you would you endorse that?

SPEAKER_05 32:29

What font is it, and what are the color choices?

SPEAKER_03 32:32

It is in like that fucking Renaissance font. I like that. Okay. And it's it's got a big cartoon like like star explosion behind it. So it's like what kind of star?

SPEAKER_05 32:45

This is important.

SPEAKER_03 32:48

Not the kind you're implying. I'm thinking like you know, the the jagged cartoon. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 32:53

Like the bam pow.

SPEAKER_03 32:54

Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's just arrest them all. And it has two exclamation points, so it's not kidding.

SPEAKER_05 33:01

As long as he didn't like ever go into detail on like talking about yeah, I'd probably endorse that.

SPEAKER_03 33:07

You're willing to, you're that's kind of a neat moral exercise, isn't it? Like you're gonna endorse it so long as you never know who it's actually talking about.

SPEAKER_05 33:15

Sure, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 33:16

You are so comfortable with sin and corruption, and I was right to call you a coward.

SPEAKER_05 33:23

I wouldn't say I'm a coward, more just indecisive.

SPEAKER_03 33:26

No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm getting I'm getting I'm having a wonderful time. Um so I don't I don't mean to judge anyone who uses cameo, but I I sincerely can't think of any actor I would really want to say something, and like all the things I would want an actor to say, I don't think it would be nice to have them say. Like alright. I'm going to talk alright, I want to talk about the action.

SPEAKER_05 33:57

Now, the action here.

SPEAKER_03 34:00

I want to talk about the fights. I want to talk about the gun fights, I want to talk about the traces. I want to talk about the chases, both foot and car. This one had it all.

SPEAKER_05 34:12

Yeah, it really did. I have a couple observations as well, but uh I'll let you get started.

SPEAKER_03 34:18

So the one thing well, first of all, I know I'm I like like we just talked a lot of shit that we're gonna have to cut, and here I am about to fucking stick my toe in a kiddie pool full of diarrhea again. But I'm about I'm about to introduce a topic.

SPEAKER_05 34:35

I have heard You know who else introduced a topic?

SPEAKER_03 34:42

That's an interesting way to go about to to describe it. That's that might be letting it off a little easy. I'd like to introduce a topic that could be a little volatile, okay, a little charged, and I'd like you to bear with me. But in some reviews I've seen, I've seen people express frustration when there's a combat scene and the protagonist is a you know shorter than average, or you know, like a non-especially built woman, and she's fighting bigger guys and succeeding. Now, bear with me because I don't want to talk about this along the typical like, oh, is it sexist, is it not sexist, whatever. Like biology, like well, well, like, well, like coming at it from that angle, like, yes, I can see how it can be a little like if you are looking at it from that angle, then yeah, I can see why you'd be uh frustrated, but I'm gonna I'm gonna be very risque, not risque here. I'm gonna be very brave.

unknown 35:51

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 35:52

And I'm gonna say, shut up. Like, it's it's just the price of admission, right?

SPEAKER_05 35:56

Like part of the bargain you make with the movie, like we do with pretty much every movie.

SPEAKER_03 36:02

You're going into the action movie expecting that the main character probably won't get like killed in the very first sequence, right? Like you're going in with the expectation that the act that the action hero is probably gonna do some active shit. So like I that that doesn't truck with me, where people's like, oh, that's very unrealistic.

SPEAKER_05 36:21

That doesn't truck with you.

SPEAKER_03 36:22

That's that doesn't truck with me. How'd you like that? That was goddamn good, dude. I'm in my old fucking, I'm in my 1950s.

SPEAKER_05 36:31

Uh even earlier than that. That's like 1900.

SPEAKER_03 36:36

That doesn't truck with me, Monsignor. Pilgrim. That don't truck with me, Pilgrim.

SPEAKER_05 36:41

You best take that tight little ass and wander on out of this town.

SPEAKER_03 36:45

I see you here coming to fuck some wagon wheels.

SPEAKER_05 36:49

Looking all cute like that.

SPEAKER_03 36:51

Looking all cute like that, making eyes at my wagon wheels. Well, these here wheels have been promised to wheelfucker Jones.

SPEAKER_05 37:00

He's like lubing up the wheels.

SPEAKER_01 37:02

He's like, he comes to town at sunset to take his pick of the wheels. Wait, it's so fucked up. It's so fucking crazy. You gotta get out of here. This is this is fucking nuts, man.

SPEAKER_03 37:17

It turns into a horror movie.

SPEAKER_01 37:19

He just comes and he fucks my wheels. Oh Jesus.

SPEAKER_05 37:25

Then you hear like a rooster crowing or something, and like, get out of here!

SPEAKER_03 37:30

This isn't what I wanted to be. I build my I build wheels to connect the world. Not for some indecent being to have his way.

SPEAKER_04 37:43

You ever wonder why the railroad never came to this town? This is why!

SPEAKER_01 37:47

This is why he didn't want the competition.

SPEAKER_03 37:55

I love the turn. I'm very happy that we took that detour. Oh, sure. Um, here's what I was trying to say, though. Here's what I'm trying to say. When it's a smaller than average combatant against a group of larger than average or average-sized combatants, it's and like, you know, I I like being generous in trying to interpret other people's uh views, even if I don't agree with them. And like if you uh if you're doing a movie that's like at least couched in reality, even if it's not grounded, then yeah, I can see how that might uh wear. I do sincerely believe that the price of admission is like the firmest argument.

SPEAKER_05 38:36

Yeah, I would uh agree, but I would also add on that um because I watched uh ballerina recently, the uh John Wick's being spinoff. Um Anna De Armas, I believe, is in that. Yes, god she is.

SPEAKER_03 38:49

Uh we don't need to get into it, but man, what a fucking No, don't don't don't don't finish the sentences, leave it ambiguous. Nobody can tell if you really actress. Oh, damn it, you ruined it. Like, I we could have just if you just go like God, she's so uh you know, just like you can just tell she cheats at cards.

SPEAKER_05 39:09

No, um never mind.

SPEAKER_03 39:10

All right, go ahead, go ahead.

SPEAKER_05 39:11

Um, in that movie, there is um a whole sequence, uh not a whole sequence, it's a very brief part of a larger sequence where her trainer just kind of points out, like, hey, like if you're fighting dudes, they're always gonna be like bigger than you, but like yeah, you know, you still have advantages that you can use. And it's not all kicking people in the balls, but there are scenes where it's like, okay, she's fighting like a dude who's like fucking strong or multiple ones, yeah. She has to be fucking clever, she's got to use the environment to her advantage and everything. And for me, it's like that's not a necessary part of a movie, but it gets bonus points for it when they do do it.

SPEAKER_03 39:42

Yeah, and I I yeah, I agree, I agree. Like, I it's nice that they addressed it, and in this movie, it's nice that they addressed it uh by excuse me, uh Charlise. They're on uh like I said, going for the knees, using uh the uh all sorts of ball whacking props. Yeah, using all sorts of ball whacking props, going for the balls, uh going for the eyes, using momentum to her advantage.

SPEAKER_05 40:07

Uh she stabs a guy in the face with some keys.

SPEAKER_03 40:10

There is this amazing bit where she stabs a dude in the face with some keys, and he's just walking around with keys dangling from his face as he's chasing her. It fucking rules so hard.

SPEAKER_05 40:20

And that's kind of one if she later stabs with a corkscrew and then runs over.

SPEAKER_03 40:25

Yeah, yeah, and he comes back. Like he comes back like eight different times.

SPEAKER_05 40:28

I noted that I like that kind of trope of just the villain he's gonna be able to do it. Oh, I love that he quit.

SPEAKER_03 40:33

I love that. And it's always like a goon, like a goon who won't fucking quit, and he just keeps coming. Like it rules so hard.

SPEAKER_05 40:39

And they had, I think, a good distinction between goons that she fought in this movie, too, right? Because she had a much easier time with like a big group of policemen than she did fighting those two, uh, like I think they were KGB guys in the stairwell. Yeah, like the four KGB guys.

SPEAKER_03 40:54

Like, like um, I mean, let's pause and give a shout out. Uh, I I believe his last name is pronounced Leicht. Leich? Leich? David Leich. David Leich is the director of this movie. He has had a couple of really good heaters. Like he's done good. He's directed Deadpool 2, he directed Hobbs and Shaw, uh, and he co-directed John Wick. He's done good. He and like you can tell this movie hits some very John Wick notes, you know, like it's all about that deeply involved uh all about that deeply involved combat and all that like so he's done a lot of very cool uh character-driven actions, I would say. Uh and we'll talk about this.

SPEAKER_05 41:46

Slick but with some grit to him.

SPEAKER_03 41:48

Slick and gritty.

SPEAKER_05 41:52

Oh boy, chef boy RD, slick and gritty.

SPEAKER_01 41:55

Oh, old I was thinking more like a gold age, a gold rush-era prostitute, like or a brother going down to the old slick and gritty.

SPEAKER_05 42:05

Slick and gritty. Run in getting for gold all week.

SPEAKER_03 42:08

Run in a two-gram nugget. Gonna go down to the slick and slick and gritty. And I'm gonna get a slick and gritty.

SPEAKER_05 42:16

You have a menu, and it's like that's the special every day.

SPEAKER_03 42:19

What's a slick and gritty, you ask? It's where you it's where she rubs a raw chicken on your business and then on your per perineum, is what it's called. The man's gonna and then gives you a quick tan paper handy. That's what's hot back in the gold rush era.

SPEAKER_05 42:40

And that's the story of how North Dakota joined the union.

SPEAKER_03 42:43

That's the after the president interred a ritual slick and gritty without crying.

SPEAKER_05 42:50

North Dakota was formerly inducted. Yeah, James K. Polk. A lot of people don't know that about him. He's famously credited. I probably fucked up the timeline there.

SPEAKER_03 43:00

You know what? We're we're just we're not gonna stand by that.

SPEAKER_05 43:03

Um but action scenes, there are a variety of them, and they're executed in different styles. You know, there are like I think two scenes where slow motion is used in a gunfight. Yeah. But I think it's used sparingly. It's really like when it's used, it's like it's punchy.

SPEAKER_02 43:17

And the vast majority of them are choreographed, it's it's and the choreographed the the choreography.

SPEAKER_05 43:22

The choreography. Yeah, in contrast to that though, you also have the the vehicle chase scene, which is I think mostly filmed from inside the car, which is I think a challenging way of filming it and it pays off here. And then you've got the more fast-paced, like real-time fight scenes, including the one take, which we'll get to.

SPEAKER_03 43:41

We yeah, yeah. Um, I was just about to talk about that. If you don't go for it. There is I feel like it used to be much more uh rare when an action movie would do a one continuous take shot. I feel like it's more common these days. It's like a flex, but I Yeah, it is it is absolutely a flex. And, you know, like because this is an Artsy Farty podcast, it definitely lends an air of claustrophobia to the to the scene, you know? Like uh in this movie, it was taken place as uh Charlize Theron and a and a spy that she's escorting to West Berlin. Yeah, the spyglass guy who memorized the whole list.

SPEAKER_05 44:24

Yeah, yeah. He's wounded and she's gotta lead him like through uh I guess an apartment building and down the staircase.

SPEAKER_03 44:30

Yes, someone's trying to kill him because if he's dead, then the list becomes much more valuable. It's James McAvoy. James McAvoy's trying to kill him. James McAvoy's trying to kill him.

SPEAKER_05 44:40

But also the KGB who shows up in the staircase.

SPEAKER_03 44:42

Yes, yes. And there's this long one-take scene where she fist fights uh the KGB and she fucking wrestles a couple of them, she stabs a couple of them, she beats a couple of them to death, she shoots a couple of them, uh, and it's fucking grueling. Yes. Like, like uh, you know, we talk about movies that have confidence, right? And like part of that means subjecting your audience to a one continuous take, violent shot. Like I would if I say old boy style, would you know what I meant? And would you agree?

SPEAKER_05 45:19

Oh, sure, yeah. The Josh Brolin movie. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

SPEAKER_03 45:23

I hope we get an angry email about that too.

SPEAKER_05 45:25

Like, I hope you recommended it to me a while ago. Yeah, did you? Like a long time ago.

SPEAKER_03 45:30

Oh, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 45:30

I watched it like within the year of your sentence, but you recommended it to me when I was like 13. I was like, oh, I should check that out.

SPEAKER_03 45:37

Oh boy, I was I was not responsible at all. But in fairly but the hallway scene in uh yeah, like like uh that that weary, like the the fucking protagonist has taken so much hits, like brutal.

SPEAKER_05 45:50

Like everyone's taken like a second in the middle, just like she gets fucking thrown around.

SPEAKER_03 45:57

My god, like she takes some fucking hits, multiple flights of stairs, multiple flights of stairs, it's so fucking brutal, and she is like by the end, she's fucking a mess. She's a bloody fucking mess. And yeah, but she sells it, like she sells the hell out of it. She fights her way out of this thing and then escapes in a car chase, and it's all in one continuous shot, and like it is a total flex, but yes, it also makes us feel like her going through every grinding moment of trying to escape, you know. Like, yeah, it's it's so good for like really selling the wear and tear of combat, you know? Like it's it's great mechanical and artistic choice when you really want to get into it.

SPEAKER_05 46:44

And it's a flex, but it's a very earned flex by not just the director, but by you know, Charlize and all the stunt men, all the all the camera people, the camera movements themselves are effortless, you know, that never gets in the way. You can never sense it. Uh the actors are all just oh fuck, it's just so goddamn.

SPEAKER_03 47:01

No, it is it is that whole fucking movie is worth it just for that scene.

SPEAKER_05 47:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:07

Um, and you know, it's but it's a little more common now, but again, like it's so perfect when it's done. I I I really hate saying this, I'm sorry. Like, it's perfect when it's done well. And like, you know, I hate fucking saying that because it's like, oh, when it's done well, I like it. Oh, really? Yeah, amazing. Amazing that I love something done well. That's incredible.

SPEAKER_05 47:25

I mean, you know my favorite uh one take. What's your favorite if you got one?

SPEAKER_03 47:29

Oh uh the protector with Tony Jaw uh is one of the earliest adopters of this method, but it he's uh as you know, he's a uh he's a Thai sensation.

SPEAKER_02 47:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:40

Um we Thai sensation, and it's him infiltrating like some gangster's casino, and he's fighting his way up some stairs, and like there's like a there's like pachinko on one floor and there's a massage on the on the next floor, and he's like he's like people are chasing him, and like he's he hides in a in a in like a in a brothel with with where there's a John going on. Like it it rules. What about you?

SPEAKER_05 48:08

I gotta watch that. Uh the hospital shootout in uh hard boiled. Ah 100%, dude. Like I do, I do think multiple floors, an elevator ride in the middle, dual-wielding guns, yeah, jumping through fucking plate glass. There were no safety standards for that football. It is kind of uh pioneered by I think Asian uh yeah, the Hong Kong, especially um like heroic bloodshed, kind of that subgenre, the Chow Yun Fat uh uh John Woo.

SPEAKER_03 48:35

Um isn't that nice though? Like, isn't that nice that that tradition gets carried on and woven into our action traditions?

SPEAKER_05 48:44

One thing I also uh noticed how many good fucking one take uh scenes are set in a stairwell, too, right? That seems like a very for me. Like if I was gonna shoot one, it wouldn't be in a fucking stairwell. It sounds like a huge pain in the ass, but there's so many great one takes set in stairwells.

SPEAKER_03 49:00

Well, see, but that's the thing, though, is like that's the that's the disadvantage of the uh one take is that if it if they were just going down a hall, it would feel too much like a video game. It would be kind of boring, and you just be like always answering. Yeah, but that's like that's very A, it didn't last nearly as long as this one.

SPEAKER_05 49:21

Good point.

SPEAKER_03 49:22

Uh and you know, it was uh that whole one take, that was less about the one take than it was about just seeing a guy get his ass kicked, you know? For me, for me, like the one to for it to to be like because there's two different kinds, right? Like Old Boy was just shot uh from a side view, showing the whole thing, like a side scroller. But this one and you know, the the one takes I've been describing.

SPEAKER_05 49:46

This one you got the camera movement in and out around the stairs.

SPEAKER_03 49:48

And so like you kind of that kind of comes with an implicit promise, right? That you're gonna go through some interesting uh movement pieces. So like it doesn't have to be stairwells, like it not it can also be like jumping over windows or something. Like you know what I mean, you know what I mean. Like it can all it can also be that.

SPEAKER_05 50:05

But they did it well in hardboiled with the lobbies, different rooms on the sides. It wasn't just like hallways.

SPEAKER_03 50:11

Yeah, to keep it interesting, you kind of have to break up the uh break up the environment so it's not just like walking down a hall beating guys up.

SPEAKER_05 50:18

You don't see a ton of outdoor ones. There was one in The Northmen that was pretty fun.

SPEAKER_03 50:23

Um, I did like that one where he was where they were sieging the village. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was great. That was great. The rest of that movie was kind of weird. Robert Eggers, you coward. Oh, Jesus. Okay, well, at least you're clearing your Robert Egers. He's got a lot of good movies, though. Oh, he's got some good movies. Oh, that's what they all say. He's got some good movies. Did you see The Lighthouse? Did you see the Lighthouse? The Lighthouse is so good. Yeah, I know. Robert Egers said, keep your dick away.

SPEAKER_05 50:54

He farts a lot though. All right, the first line of dialogue is just an extended fart.

SPEAKER_03 51:00

No, I I actually really like Nosferatu.

SPEAKER_05 51:04

I haven't seen that one yet.

SPEAKER_03 51:05

Okay, you recommend that I would recommend it, and it also stars Nicholas Holt. I admit Robert Egers, the Northmen, did not blow my mind, but that was a good shot, and I thank you for doing it.

SPEAKER_05 51:21

I was like bothered probably more than I should have been by the fact they were fighting like in a volcano with their cock and balls out. Like I know we were supposed to like see that's put that aside because it's like it's mythic and shit, right? It's like a legendary thing.

SPEAKER_03 51:34

Like, but like I just keep thinking, like, oh, these poor guys, like I'm not saying I have a beef with Robert Akers, but if I did have a beef with Robert Agers, it would be the main reason. Where like you fucking set up all these very complicated and interesting uh consequences, personal consequences, and then you resolve it with magic bullshit. Yeah, well, it's like, oh, like, because the whole fucking thing about the North Man was that he learned that his mother fucking hated him and his father and resented their life, and he's like, rather than deal with this, I'm gonna go fucking fight my uncle in a fucking uh volcano.

SPEAKER_05 52:11

And also on the way, like just murder everybody else.

SPEAKER_03 52:14

Yeah, same with fucking uh the lighthouses. Like, oh, I've got this very complicated and difficult past. Like, oh, rather than resolve that, I'm just gonna I'm gonna imagine fucking a mermaid.

SPEAKER_05 52:24

And kind of same with the witch, too, right?

SPEAKER_03 52:26

Everybody gets either killed goat or yeah, like everybody gets whacked, and then it's like, well, now you can become a witch, or you can basically just be alone your whole life, you stupid asshole.

SPEAKER_05 52:37

Yo, man, the witch did a good job of making people.

SPEAKER_03 52:39

The witch would be a lot funnier if that's what Satan said at the end.

SPEAKER_05 52:43

He's like stands up on both legs, as hind legs as the goat, and just like, whoa.

SPEAKER_03 52:47

And he's just like, Well, your whole family's dead, you fucking loser. Yeah, you want to be a witch or do you want to be an asshole?

SPEAKER_05 52:53

Like, I'll let you ride on me into the woods.

SPEAKER_03 52:55

Like bowls there. I I feel like nobody really portrays Satan as kind of a kind of like a a blunt, straightforward dick. Like a like like a like a socially awkward asshole.

SPEAKER_05 53:07

Yeah, and like Satan, you're a bad guy.

SPEAKER_03 53:09

Yeah, no, yeah, for sure. Well, your mom is fucking gross. Yeah. Yeah, your mom's fucking gross.

SPEAKER_05 53:17

She's burning in hellfire.

SPEAKER_03 53:19

I saw her taking dumps on her driveway like a fucking dog. Oh that's why she that's why she's in hell. They don't tell you that. But that's you go to hell for that.

SPEAKER_05 53:27

You go to hell for shitting outdoors.

SPEAKER_03 53:29

You go to hell for shitting outdoors. Unless, unless, unless you do a nice little hole and bury it.

SPEAKER_05 53:36

I remember like a while ago, I was on like a road trip through California with a friend and we like stopped at like a scenic overlook so to the bathroom, right? And like, you know, took turns like going behind the bushes and doing our business, but like we uh fucking highway patrol car like pulls up while my friend is outside and I'm like taking a shit, like behind the bushes, and then he like asked my friend, like, yeah, what are you what are you doing out here? He's like, Oh, I'm just waiting for my friend. It's like, yeah, like you seem kind of nervous, like, what's up? And he tells him, and the guy's like, Oh, you guys are just dropping some grounders? That's fine. People do that all the time here. Great turn of phrase. Dropping some grounders. That's not where did you hope it was gonna go?

SPEAKER_03 54:12

I hoped we were gonna get like kind of a bugs bunny episode where like a tough sheriff comes by and says, You boys ain't pooping outside, are you? And then like you've gotta hike up your short your pants, like no, no, officer, no, and then you drive a little further up and like find a new place to poop, but he's there too. He's there already, and then like he eventually catches wind on you, and he's like, Hey, what's his freeze? And then there's like this this fucking like banjo chase music is like your friend and you are like hauling ass down the highway.

SPEAKER_05 54:41

I was thinking it would take like a different turn. We'd see like a different good place to shit, but there's a guy with his pants down and like a shit it on ass, and the sheriff's just shooting him in the head.

SPEAKER_00 54:48

And we're like, oh no, oh god.

SPEAKER_01 54:57

Out in North Dakota, where the fucking wheelfucker jokes. You got two options justice by gun or justice by wheel.

SPEAKER_03 55:10

I'm sorry. Here's something I do want to say. We want to talk about pageantry. We talk about this fucking pageantry all the fucking time on this uh podcast. This had it out the fucking ass. This movie is set in the 80s.

SPEAKER_05 55:25

1989? 1989. Because it's like when the Berlin Wall fell. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 55:29

Fall of the Berlin Wall. 1989.

SPEAKER_05 55:32

Yeah, it's 1980s. Yeah. Um something you were alive for and I was not.

SPEAKER_03 55:37

I in 1989, I was five. So I don't remember a lot. Uh I seem to remember enjoying cartoons.

SPEAKER_05 55:48

So you're gonna say enjoying the fall of the Berlin Wall.

SPEAKER_03 55:51

Yeah, five, just like excellent, excellent. Unification is finally at hand. One of those fucking kids who's like, instead of telling you about crazy sh some crazy bug I saw, I'd fucking give you my lengthy opinion on the East German. I mean don't fucking talk to me until you've read my opinions on the Cambodian bombing campaign, you sack of shit.

SPEAKER_05 56:20

I'll give you one hint, domino theory.

SPEAKER_03 56:23

I imagine in this case, I'm like a baby with I'm like a a a young a young kid with like a cigar and like I mean imagine like a boss baby, but he works for Mac V Sog during Vietnam. I'm thinking like boss baby, but he's like a fucking hard-nosed editor of an old timey newspaper. Oh, okay. Listen up, you ps you pieces of crap. I'm out here to we're in one business and it's breaking muck. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_05 56:48

No, I was imagining like boss baby, but he works for Mac V Sog, like back in Vietnam.

SPEAKER_01 56:54

What?

SPEAKER_05 56:55

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he's like sitting in a corrugated iron shack in the fucking like jungle and he's wearing aviators and smoking a cigar, and there's some like poor farmer like strapped up to a car battery and like screaming like I don't know anything. He's like, turn up the voltage, I don't hear him speaking English yet. Jesus Christ. All his records are redacted.

SPEAKER_03 57:14

I was taking that somewhere so much more whimsical. You fucking had to make it dark.

SPEAKER_05 57:21

Listen, the pageantry um in this one, how would you find the main categories? 80s. 80s just the 80s vibe overall.

SPEAKER_03 57:32

Like, this was like a more punk James Bond. I wrote like the fashion the fashion is a little more edgy and risque rather than you know classy and buttoned up. Uh the the vibes are much grittier and much uh much more brutal than you know the sort of whimsy of early Bond. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 57:54

And you know, you see that text I sent you last week with uh Bond as a clown. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 58:01

I I loved what we did there.

SPEAKER_05 58:03

Um sorry, back to uh pageantry.

SPEAKER_03 58:06

Yeah, neon, the music fuck the music. The soundtrack was amazing.

SPEAKER_05 58:11

Specific shout out to how good the goddamn soundtrack was. God damn.

SPEAKER_03 58:15

Someone had to pay out the ass to get this soundtrack, and they put they put it to good use. And shout out, real quick. Uh I loved that they were constantly finding like quote in universe reasons to use it. Like it was it was rarely just uh playing the soundtrack for the sake of it, but they were like turn on the radio. Yeah, they would turn on the radio to like cover uh to cover their conversation because they thought they were being bugged, and they turned on the radio to like mask their steps. It's like it was very cool, very cool. A nice little touch, I would say.

SPEAKER_05 58:51

I was really proud of myself, but I want to make sure I used it right. I said I'll look it up while you keep talking.

SPEAKER_03 58:58

So well, this is my whole thing is like the violence is oh well done. The violence is super stylish, the pageantry is off the charts, it's a gorgeous film. And the plot is very interesting. Uh it's not just about spies, it's about spies uncovering other spies. There are multiple spies working against each other in this film, and it's all handled well.

SPEAKER_05 59:26

Uh one thing before we get I think I pick up where you're going, but one thing I did want to talk to you about was our overall, and we can keep it relatively short, because I'm sure we'll unpack this in future episodes too, but our different perceptions of I guess the 80s on film and what the ideal 80s are.

SPEAKER_03 59:40

You know what is what I did what I did write is it's very weird to see the 80s becoming this very idealized and stylized uh era. Like, you know, you know Happy Days? Have you ever seen that show? Yeah, it's like but you you're familiar with it, right? Like that came out in the 70s, I think, and it was a very highly stylized, idealized version of the 1950s. Uh and like that's what we think about uh when we think of the 1950s. And you know, we don't think about the fucking horrible social uh relations.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:22

We fuck, you know what? I'm not even gonna get into the Virginia uh history lessons. I will say my mental image, my vibe of the 1980s is just a dude wearing like a nice, like pristine white suit, no shirt underneath, just fucking gold chain, big gold chain, white suit.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:40

He's on a saxophone.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:42

Uh he's on a white speedboat, yeah, driving, or maybe red speed boat, driving through Miami Harbor. There are two giant duffel bags behind him. One's full of cocaine, like not even bagged up, it's just a duffel full of cocaine. And the other one is full of money, and both of them for some reason are unzipped, and there's cocaine and money billowing out behind him while he fires an Uzi one-handed at the uh, I guess, police that are chasing him. I don't endorse violence against police, obviously. This is more like a GTA Vice City reference, just for context. But my mental image is it mainly focuses on the dude who just doesn't give a fuck that his cocaine and fucking money are billowing out behind him. He's just aura farming so goddamn hard. That's what I think of when I think the 1980s.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:24

So two things. Yes. I mean, for one, you're accurate, and that's kind of what I'm talking about, is like that's kind of what was what the 80s were like?

SPEAKER_05 1:01:32

Holy shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:33

That's what the 80s were like in fucking well, not I mean, that's what we like to think the eighties were like. That's the idealized, stylized version. Okay, right.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:41

But I'm asking what the what was the grit and grime of it, you know?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:44

I mean, the grit and grime of it was that uh there was yeah, there was reagonomics, there was uh the tail end of a very turbulent decade in the 70s. Uh there was basically unregulated prosperity as a lot of socialists as a lot of social systems were gutted, and uh yeah, unregulated prosperity sounds kind of sick, though. Yeah, I mean it was kind of sick, and like that's that's yeah, word it got kind of sick. But uh also I just thought it was f I thought it was very funny when you said uh you're not endorsing any violence against cops. I'm like, isn't it neat at this point in history in 2025 where you kind of have to pivot between who between specifying who you're not endorsing violence against? It's good to be it's good to be specific about Yeah, no, no, I'm I'm I'm not I'm just saying like isn't this fucking funny to be in this era where where you gotta be you gotta you gotta endorse violence against someone, you just gotta be careful about who it is. Uh am I clear to talk about I because there's only two more topics I want to cover.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:51

I guess the only question that I had was something that you saw uh that you had in your notes, which I thought was interesting, was that you have a kind of a different preference than I do for how movies do the eighties.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:03

You wanna get into that just real quick? I thought that was an interesting take that you had, because for me, obviously, it's that vibe I just described, and I'm just like a Labrador with fucking peanut butter.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:12

Yeah, no, I I feel like my view of the 80s has been kind of negatively soured because I feel like I've been exposed to a lot of movies that are just and shows that are just kind of wanking off the eighties. Uh, and I'm you know, I'm sorry. I sincerely mean no disrespect to this movie or its fan or this book or its fans, but Ready Player One is just like endless obsession over the eighties, and it's just there is kind of a sort of and I'm not saying it's fair, but there's kind of a vibe where the eighties are just very like saccharin and pandering, nostalgic, and like I f I kind of blame Stranger Things for that, for like painting this very glossy, childlike image of the 80s, you know.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:00

I think it brought it back into the kind of like the forefront of the here we go, Zeitgeist. But um I think it was already there, and well, at least for my generation growing up, like our experience, or at least mine with the 80s was like Robocop predator. It was just heater after heater after heater. I never really saw any of the the bad stuff directly or really heard it emphasized that much, you know, because I was born like several years after the Berlin Wall fell. Like I didn't know shit about the Cold War, really.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:26

Well, yeah, plus also your fucking I mean we we happened upon a very happy time cinematically where we were dressing up in interesting social, I mean interesting historical and cultural issues, and we were dressing that up very effectively in action movies. Like nobody was watching Robocop and coming away well, like some people were, but like kids weren't watching Robocop and coming away with like, wow, the privatization of police is actually a very real threat that would would like unconscionably justify uh uncomp un would inevitably compromise uh the for the uh you know, yeah, but he shot those guys off. That was but then you saw it, you're like, ah fuck, he's a robot and he got a gun.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:11

Yeah. Come with me, or there will be trouble.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:18

Yeah, that was that's my image of the 1980s. It's kind of pandering and a little sour. So I was happy to see this movie embrace its aesthetics, but like I'm actually gonna skip over my next plot, uh my next point, because I didn't know.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:32

So we know what I took from the audience.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:34

Uh my next point was gonna be how, and I'm just I guess I'll just say this. The aesthetics are so very cool uh and so stylish and so enamoring, and the plot is so awesome and so intricate and so multi layered that they kind of compete for attention. The caveat I'm not the brightest guy. So, like I I I fully Believe in this movie's ability to just be supremely confident and trust its audience to figure shit out. And yet, I'm also going to say when acknowledged at the start that this movie kind of flew over under a lot of people's radars, despite the fact that it's excellent, and I think maybe that might be why, is because you know, like with John Wick, the pitch is very simple. X-Hitman takes bloody revenge against Mafia for killing his dog. Simple. This one, much harder to describe.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:29

Like triple agents, double agents, triple agents, double agents.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:32

It's rough. But I guess what I really want to say is there was an amazing sex scene in this movie. It was intense. It was physical. It was passionate. It was beautiful, but it was not staged. It looked like two people overcome with passion, and they stayed true to their characters, and it fit the plot so well, and it was hot as hell. And I'm trying to be so sensitive about it because it was a very artistic sex scene, but also fucking well done. Like fucking well done. I'm sorry if that makes me a little coarse, but when I watch movies and characters kiss, I shout encouragement like I'm watching a sports game.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:21

Like if I see fun to be at the theater with.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:25

Well, I I try to maintain in the theater, you know, but if I see people kissing, I in at least internally, I'm going like, yes, get in there. Get in there. Like fucking I've always said that I like it when people fall in love. I like it when there's physical attraction. I like it when there's chemistry, and the chemistry is acknowledged, which is all what we've said sexual stakes are before. And this movie has like perfect sexual stakes. Do you knocks them out of the park? Do you like you agree with me on this? Right.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:00

Phenomenal sexual stakes. Just the chemistry between the actors, both physically and just emotively, I think.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:06

But such an interesting chemistry, too. So like the the the attraction. Well, for one, I want to I want to give this movie credit. It's very sexy all around.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:18

Like, yeah, everybody's dripped the fuck out.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:20

Everybody, everybody is gorgeous, everybody, but like gorgeous in a in a very natural, authentic way, you know? Like nobody looks like a supermod. Well, no, that's not true. Um, but you know what I'm saying is like everyone is very attractive, and that attraction is very it doesn't feel like it's trying to pan, it doesn't feel like it's trying to titillate you. It feels like it is just how it is, and it's like it seems almost effortless. Yes, confident. Confident is a great word for it. Uh there's this bit where uh she uh like has James McAvoy on his back and they're like exchanging quips, and he's smoking a cigarette, and she takes the cigarette out of his mouth and smokes it and then throws it away, and it's just such a hot fucking gesture. And that's like something we talk about, right? How sexual stakes are not always overtly sexual. Like that is but that's exactly what I mean, is like that's such a small, intimate gesture that is linked with power, and like it it scratches, it sends a very powerful signal to the brain.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:29

Charlie Sheron uh encounters a French agent, a junior French agent named LaSalle, who is uh she's pla yeah, Delphine LaSalle, played by uh Sophia Butella, I believe.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:45

Sophia Butella, and they are attracted to each other, and they make out in a restroom, and because this is a spy film, it has my favorite fucking probe where the spies are horny for each other, but also willing to kill each other.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:03

Because she like reaches behind uh LaSalle and pulls out a gun that LaSalle had and she points it to her head and says, Why do you have this? And they fucking talk and they kind of connect and they connect over this over this this is a low-going undercurrent uh where Charlize Thuron's character craves to have emotions she knows she can never have. Like to do her job, she cannot have the connection she wants, she cannot be as passionate as she wants, she cannot show that to anyone. This this movie has perfect sexual stakes. For one, it has plenty of physical chemistry, the characters like touching each other and react and interplay well with each other, it has emotional chemistry, they have an emotional reason to get together. Uh and like I I I really wanted to talk more about this, but I don't think there's time. But you know, like the thing that drives me nuts when people say, like, oh, I don't mind sex scenes as long as they're necessary to the plot. Like, what the fuck do you mean?

SPEAKER_05 1:11:10

Like what the fuck do you mean boogie nights, I guess.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:14

Like, like, what if the plot is involves them fucking? Like, what if things change as a result of them fucking? Which I agree. Exactly. So, like, I I fucking can't stand that criticism. Like, oh, I I want sex that's related to the plot. Shut up. What you mean is like you don't like sex, but you'll read it if it's necessary. It's like, okay, fine. I'm in a completely different boat. I love sex scenes, I love intimacy, I love that romance, I love that chemistry. Uh and this movie did it so well. And as you say, the goal of any sexual stakes, of any sexual scene, I should be say, is the culmination of those sexual stakes and how they change. It's similar to a fight scene, in that at the end of a fight scene, something should have changed, right? Something should have changed. The the uh Charlie's Theron is wounded and beaten up, and that affects her for the next fight. And after that, she is less trustful of someone because now she understands she's being betrayed by someone. Uh, in a sex scene, you should have the emotional chemistry and the physical chemistry all leading up to an event that changes something, and it doesn't necessarily have to be sex, you know? No, it can be the moment the characters finally kiss.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:39

But something needs to have changed. Uh, and in this movie, it goes pretty fucking well. Charlize Theron uh reveals that she cannot feel the emotion she wants, and something has changed as a real what you don't want, and I'm sorry that I'm ranting a little bit. I I swear I swear I do want your opinion on this. Uh, the what you don't want is bioware sex scenes where the sex is the goal, and like once you get and the sex is the checklist, and then you you go through the motions of meeting and opening up, and then the reward is the sex scene. No, that's not how it should be. That's after that, there's what we're a couple and we don't and we fuck sometimes. What is that? There's no more tension, and also that's not fucking true to relationships.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:28

Yeah, where a lot where a lot of people goes on from there.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:31

Yeah, like where a lot of people uh become unhappy, and including myself, is when you get a relationship and you think, oh, finally I have a relationship, the hard part's over, I found someone, and now we can just cruise and be happy. Go, no, you have to fucking actually pay attention to your partner.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:48

Welcome to real life, bitch.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:49

Welcome to real life, bitch. This is real intimacy with real equity, like real consequences, real consequences. Now fuck that wagon wheel. Pillow. But you know, like that's what a sex scene should be: a change, a culmination. And if it's a culmination, but not the end goal, but not the end goal, like just something should have changed, the relationship should have changed as a result, and this movie does that extremely well. That is what I wanted to say on it. I would love to hear your thoughts.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:22

I I think it uh does it well, and it also goes a slightly different direction than a lot of movies do, where there's increased trust between the characters as a result, and this one goes a different way, and Lorraine becomes less trusting, which, like you said, is tragic, really. That's the the sad undercurrent to this, is like what this life is doing to her.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:40

I mean, and that that's that's the beauty, right? Is that a sexual scene can also change the relationship in a different way. Like we're typically used to it being like, oh, they have committed the ultimate intimacy together, and now they are closer as a result. No, sometimes it can be doing the ultimate intimacy, and you are less close as a result. And I fucking loved that.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:02

Yeah, uh it's got overall the drip, everybody's like just vibe, special shout out to the costume designers.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:10

Yes, yes, the fucking the whole style department, everyone involved in the lighting, in the setting, in the costumes, in the hair and makeup. Fucking beautiful, beautiful. This is one of those rare movies where it feels like everyone was on exactly the same page, and it yeah, that is a feat.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:29

And if I'm right, um and if Wikipedia is right, then the budget was only thirty million dollars only. Like to me, that's that's quite pressed that they were able to pull off so many cool stuff. I agree.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:41

That speaks very well to Charlie's Theron, too, right? Like she'll she'll do these smaller projects. And James McAvoy as well. And James that guy just fucking loves. He just he's in it for the game.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:51

Slides into weird fucking roles that I get that sense of. He was just like, this could be fun.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:55

Well, he yeah, he just he he was in fucking uh he was in split, he was in glass, like he was he was in that fucking he was a fucking goofy ball in that. So yeah, James McAvoy, excellent fit, everyone fit this perfect. And I wrote in my notes if you if there's a movie with John Goodman in it, you're in for a good time.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:16

True.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:16

Like, very rarely has John Goodman been in a bad film, and even then, he's one of those, he's one of those pizza actors, right? Like, even bad, even John Goodman in a bad film is still John Goodman, and it's pretty good.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:28

Not saying it's a bad film, I would say his only like maybe miscasting was um when he played Peter in The Passion of the Christ.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:37

I think it was really fucked up how he did his Dan character there. Well, Jesus, I'll tell you what.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:44

Someone's gonna fucking betray you. Or if you can if you can believe it, Jesus, someone's gonna betray you. And at the last supper, too. Guess we'll be taking that food to go, huh?

SPEAKER_05 1:17:00

Question. If if they had to order the Last Supper off Uber Eats, what do you think they would go with?

SPEAKER_03 1:17:06

Oh, I think I think they would all get uh tacos from a local taco place, but Judas didn't get his drink, and that's what fucking pushes him to do it. Like, and nobody didn't get his Baja Blast. Well, I guess Baja Blast is more corporate. Yeah, he did not get his Baja Blast. He didn't get his fucking blue dew. If you were really the son of God, you would have to be. If you were really the son of God, you could turn this water into mountain dew. I hate, I hate, I hate with the Fury of a Thousand Sons that we waited until the end of the fucking episode to come up with gamer Judas. He fucking betrayed Christ because Christ didn't want to romance Tally.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:51

Hey, I romance Tally.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:53

I know the fucking Judas is like, what do you mean you won't romance tally? She's the only choice.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:59

Oh no, there's different choices for different people who are wrong.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:02

Jesus is like, but I I I wanted to romance I wanted to romance Miranda. She has a sweetness.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:10

So Jesus confirmed S-Man.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:13

Just tell me this, Jesus. Which of the Sonic games is best?

SPEAKER_02 1:18:21

And he's breathing real heavy.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:23

I like Sonic Rise of Lyric. Oh, you son of Oh pilot, where are you?

SPEAKER_05 1:18:29

Yeah, he uses the fucking uh like 30 coins to just get DLC for Fortnite. Yeah, no, no, he buys skins on Overwatch because they're more expensive.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:43

And when he dies, he's in hell and he's like shackled to his skins. They've all like been patched to his flesh. He's in gamer hell, which is even worse.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:55

Yeah. They're constantly lagging and getting shit talked about.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:59

None of the gamers in Gamer Hell actually care that they're in hell. They're just happy to fucking bitch to each other about games all day. Yeah. So gamer hell and gamer heaven are exactly the same thing.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:12

What um what games do you think Judas would have like played? Do you think he would have been like, oh, MOBAs probably oh, we're gonna get some some mail for that one. But I feel like Judas would have probably been a MOBA guy. I don't know if he would have been good at it. You're cutting out a little bit. So I'm gonna keep riffing on Judas being a MOBA guy. Um I don't know a ton about MOBAs, besides like I had a really good friend in college who like um like other people would pay him to level up their League of Legends accounts. And like, Jesus Christ, the amount of toxicity that poor man subjected himself to on the behalf of a paycheck is truly legendary. Like, shout out to my friend, you know who you are. Um because fuck those League of Legends guys could be mean. You know, it's harder riffing on my own than I than I thought it would be. I'm really not sure what happened to Sam. Well, I heard him say, oh fuck, but that's about it.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:02

Alright, I'm I'm I'm I'm just gonna I'm just gonna settle it this way. I'm just gonna here's me with my final thought. Like, I'm sorry if you're just tuning in, we had some technical difficulty, but here's my final thoughts on Gamer Judas. Yes, I think I I think Gamer Judas plays League of Legends. That is exactly what I was gonna go for. I imagine he has a very hair fucking trigger because of it. Uh he's very he's that's probably what he's pissed about most, is because Jesus would not Jesus gamed with him, but he wouldn't take it seriously.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:34

Yeah, the most used keys on his keyboard are KYS.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:37

Yeah, he's he's so fucking toxic.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:40

He's like he's been banned from League, like multiple. He has like 15 alt accounts.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:45

Oh, he's he was originally banned from the apostles, but Jesus let him back in, like he gave him an extra chance.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:51

Yeah, because it's Jesus. Of course he's gonna Judas was like, I promise I'll stop telling you know Peter, Peter and Paul that they're gay.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:58

You know, I'll stop. I swear to god, I'll stop, I'll I'll stop fragging noobs.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:04

And Jesus is like, okay, you can come to the land tournament, but like you have to be cool. I told the guys you'd be cool. You have to be cool. Judas, can you be cool at the land tournament? Judas as long as they're not beep. Jesus' like, okay, you can't. Judas can't say that.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:18

Judas, there's gonna be a girl there. Judas is gonna be a girl there, and she's not gonna bother anyone.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:26

She's like, what is like, well, she's actually no Judas.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:31

Well, kinda actually's just Paul's roommate.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:36

Oh, I was thinking Mary Magdalene.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:38

Oh, technically, kind of actually, yes, but it's beside the point. All right.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:45

Who is Judas Main in Smash? That's my last question.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:48

Okay, Judas' main in Smash is Sephiroth. Okay, well. Absolutely Sephiroth. And he insists on the introductions playing out in full.

SPEAKER_05 1:22:01

Like, and he like says the quotes like real loud alongside it.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:05

And he he does the voice, and it's like one of those nasally voices thrown back in your throat, and in his head, it's like, you know, ha ha ha ha. But out here, it's like, yeah, I'm I'm destroying you, clown. I've come to destroy you, clown. He gets way too into it, and Paul's just like, Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ. And Jesus is like, Yeah, I know, I know, I know. It's like I he said he would be cool. He said he'd be cool. Just fucking give him give him some time. Maybe he just gotta relax a little. I'm so upset that we came up with this at the end.

SPEAKER_05 1:22:36

I mean, man, I there's so many great ideas I have just springing off of Gamer Judas. Like, yeah, what do you think his favorite console of all time is? Oh, it's gotta be something fucking obscure. He's it's like the Sega Saturn or something.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:49

I was thinking Sega, like or maybe Atari and Lynx. Dreamcast. I think Dreamcast, I think Lynx is too far back for GameCheck. I think Dreamcast is like the perfect level of like anime bullshit that he would love. Of course, I believe that Judas loved anime.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:05

And look, to be fair, there are some great animes out there, but not the ones that Judas liked.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:10

Anime fan Judas is even is almost even better.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:14

He's got a body pillow.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:16

Fucking he pissed off at Jesus for eating his Cheetos. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:20

He's pissed off at Jesus for liking the original end of Evangelion, like the series better than the end of Evangelion the movie. He was like, Yeah, you know, I thought that like the cut-down animation style and the exploration of Shinji like coming to terms with himself was great. And it's like, what about him coming on his own hand? Why didn't you like that?

SPEAKER_03 1:23:37

Jesus said that that Berserk 97 wasn't the best adaptation. Oh my god. Alright, fucking. That's the kind of episode, that's the kind of podcast this is. We go on very peculiar rants, but we kind of had to for this episode because otherwise we would have just been like slurping this movie's knob this whole time, which I'm not saying it doesn't deserve that. It's a fucking amazing movie.

SPEAKER_05 1:24:02

But it could have devolved into just like an extended recap and is like, oh, and we like that, and we like that. We didn't want to do that. You should just watch the movie and enjoy it, right? If you haven't already.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:12

This movie is fucking great. I think everyone should watch it. I'm so happy we saw this. It's almost too good for the likes of this. Uh we only really chose it because it flew under the radar for a lot of people, and uh I don't know why.

SPEAKER_05 1:24:28

Yeah. Good fucking movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:31

Would you like to do a little housekeeping before we decide on the next uh the next film?

SPEAKER_05 1:24:37

Yes, sir. Uh Slop Culture is a podcast hosted by Sam Sykes and Will Palmer. Please give us a five-star review on whichever platform you heard us on. That's five stars out of five, of course. Uh our cover arts by Andrew Sides. Our intro music is by Joe Roy. And you can find me on social media at Palmskis or Will underscore Palmskis pretty much everywhere.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:58

And you can find me at Sam Sykes Swears pretty much everywhere.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:02

Oh, also, we do have an email uh address you can write stuff into. That's uh slopculturepodcast at gmail.com. So go to the show.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:10

Yes, if you if you have any questions, any recommendations, or any harsh words for Will. Oh um well, if you have any harsh words for Will, you've got to go through me. But yeah, good save.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:24

Good save.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:25

Um, this has been Slop Culture. I have been your host, Sam Sykes. I've been Will Palmer, and until then, stay sloppy.