Mama Needs A Minute
"Mama Needs a Minute" is your go-to podcast for a candid and comedic look at the rollercoaster of motherhood. Hosted by Ellie and Emily, two postpartum nurses and moms, this show offers a blend of heartfelt stories and laugh-out-loud moments. Tune in to hear about the ups and downs of parenting, the importance of taking a breather, and why every mom deserves a minute to herself. Perfect for anyone seeking connection and a good laugh.
Mama Needs A Minute
SUMMER MISHAPS
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The girls are reading all your summer mishaps! From sunscreen/diaper cream mix ups to pool potty disasters, this episode will have you feeling better about your own summer moments gone wrong!
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Hello, Mamas. I'm Emily. And I'm Ellie. And this is Mama Needs a Minute.
SPEAKER_01Ellie just told me this story that sh made her really annoyed and I can tell she's still I'm like, Mama needs a minute. You know what? That other night, I actually did say, I need a minute. Did you? Yeah, I did. If I do that in person now to anybody, they're like, what? Mama needs one. No, I did. I did actually, though. I went on I went on a walk. Yeah. So nice. I went on a walk by myself just for like 20 minutes after dinner. And I listened to my audiobook and I just enjoyed the piece. And I came back and I was refreshed. I need to do more. Because I take a lot of walks with the kids. Yeah. But with the kids, I'm taking a lot of walks. And it's usually like we stop every five minutes, or now I'm holding a tricycle in one hand and a scooter in the other. And yeah. It's never just a peaceful, calm walk. Where I and I can never, you can't put two headphones in and listen to your audiobook. No. You gotta make sure your kids aren't getting hit by a car. And they're probably yapping, which is yeah, and I like that. A peaceful walk sounds nice, especially like today. It's so cool out. Yeah, it was nice. And like Marco was like, yes, go. I mean we had just finished dinner. It was already cleaned up. It was just like this lull time before bath. And I was like, I'm gonna go on a little walk. I'll be back before bath time. Were the kids being like crazy, or you just were like, this sounds like something I want to do? No, they weren't being crazy. Yeah, I was just like, I just need a second to myself. Because you know, summer you could have listened to our podcast. I didn't have any episodes to listen to. I could have circled back. Yeah. What's your favorite episode? So far, probably the one where I told you guys to punch your kid in the face if you're ever late for an appointment. I think about that moment a lot. Stop putting it. It was a joke. Ellie keeps putting her Gatorade. I have two coasters set out on this table. And she keeps setting it. Not on the coaster. Right next to the coaster. Literally right next to the coaster. This type B. And I didn't even say that. It's not gonna make a ring. It could. This coffee table is in horrible shape. We need to keep it that way. The kids are like climbing on it. But yeah, also it's two shower a day season. Do you celebrate that? For yourself or for your children? For me. Oh, I won't be partaking in that. Thank you. All summer, uh well, it's because I work out in the morning. So then I have to shower in the morning. But then by the end of the day, I'm disgusting again. And you are the type that cannot get in your bed sweaty. No. No. This actually goes back to the sheets conversation. Yeah, well, how often you wash your sheets. Yeah. But your sheets, again, like we said, are different. Yes, of course. Than a child's. I thought you meant like kids two baths a day, and I was like, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. And honestly, like, it depends on the day. If it's raining and we're not outside, it's one every other day type of vibe. Or a rinse-off, just because they enjoy like a bath before bed. But no, for me, I need a shower twice a day during the summer. Yeah. Actually, this isn't sponsored, but Lumi can sponsor me if they want to. There, I just tried this new body wash. It's called Lumi L U M E. Lume, maybe. Lume. They have the full-body deodorant that everybody is. Yes. Yes. And I've tried that before and it was okay. But this, they have a body wash. It's like a pH-friendly body wash. So you can use it like near your key cat. I put that on like, yeah, armpits and stuff. But what it's really been helping with, and I am shocked that it does anything. Because if you have big titties like I do, they always in the summertime, and you know this if you have big boobies, underneath your boobs, you get like so like sweaty and irritated. Yeah. And it gets really red and it hurts because there's just like, you know, just sweaty. Yeah. This, I have not had that at all. So if you have not at all. I wonder why. It's like a pH, and it says it like prevents like sweat and stuff for like 24 hours. I actually saw a girl on TikTok who recommended it because she puts she has really bad armpit sweat. And she was like, I swear I do not smell when I put this on my armpits. And I was like, I wonder if that would help like under boob sweat. And it does. What? So if you have big Yiddies or if you even just like are like super sweaty underneath your boobs, you need to try it. For the three guys that listen to this, they're like, what the fuck? I know. My husband's gonna be like, that's why that's in the shower. Also, like the way that guys would never understand this because they have a bottle in the shower and it's like face, body, shampoo, conditioner. It's one bottle.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it's like a baby soap, you know, like a baby is like head to toe.
SPEAKER_01And it's like suave or something that costs like three dollars. Yes. Yeah. And like the way that you have to pack all these little toiletries for a trip. Yeah. Yeah. I also have those tea, I like those tea tree exfoliating scrubs. I've told this before, I don't like getting pedicures. I know you don't. So you're like, what do I do? I have to keep up. So I like scrub my feet really good with that during the summer, and I've been using uh those foot masks. Uh-huh. Nora, the other night I was using them and she goes, Mommy, can I get a pair of those socks, please? Because are they like a sock or is it like a mask you wrap around your face? It looks like a sock if you're six. My friend actually puts every night before she goes to bed, she puts this lotion, specifically like a foot cream lotion, on her feet, and then she puts socks on. Oh, yeah. Oh, but the sensory for me, I could never do you sleep in socks? Um, in the winter, I will sleep in wool socks. Yeah. Okay, I could see the winter. I could be winter. If I fall asleep with my socks on, they usually stay. Oh, I have to take them off. Yeah, a lot of people do. It's like kicking my I kick my the comforters off my feet too usually. Yeah. So I could never do that, but I envy her soft feet. Why do you know that they're so soft? Well, I I don't know. That I guess I don't know, but they look soft from She's sending you pictures of the I pay every week. I actually, from my five-six stance, when I look down at her feet, they look extremely soft. You're five six? Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Wow.
SPEAKER_01I know actually, and I verified this this week. We were talking, my friend and I were talking about the calculation that you can do. Let me pull it up so that I can tell people so they can do it. About your wingspan? No.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01This is why we were looking it up because when there's like a thing when your kids are two that you can double, it says, uh, let's see. For girls, if you multiply their height at 18 months by two, so whatever height they are at 18 months old, if you multiply that by two, that's supposed to be their average adult height, like kind of like a little thing to show you what they're how tall they're gonna be. 18 months. And for boys, when they're two, if you multiply their height by two, that's supposed to be an average. But there was also one where you like add mom and dad's heights together, and then you like subtract and add stuff, which I'm not gonna get into that because that one was kind of wacko. But I needed to like remember my height, and so my friend measured me because we were trying to see how tall our kids were gonna be. And I think Milo was like, it said like five five or something, which kind of tracks, and it said like Julian five nine. So maybe he's gonna be a little bit taller than us. That's anyway. No, no, I want to look at my baby book and see if that's right. Oh, that's so true. Did your mom keep those stats? Yeah, I bet she did. I bet I mean they kept a lot. My baby book's got my belly button, my first tooth, a walk in my hair. Hey, speaking of teeth, has Julian ever lost one? No, has Nora? Nora's got one that's very close by a thread. She is excited. We have prepared, you know, that there is gonna be blood. There will be blood. Oh my god. Because if you didn't know that and you were a kid, you're like, I'm dying. Yeah, like, oh my god, this is really bad. No, this is expected. So she is very excited, but then she tried to like get an extra reward out of it. She was like, and then we can go get something very special at the store. And I'm like, no. Because then that's gonna be every single two. You're yeah, you're gonna get 24 special treats at the store. I will say though, that the chore chart went swimmingly the first week. Really? Yes. And she actually did her chores. Yes. What are some examples of chores? By the way, very minimal. Like open the front door for mommy. The biggest thing is that by the time school starts again, I want her doing her morning routine by herself so that I'm not like rushing her around and trying to get her and key lib ready. Because I'm like, a six-year-old can get yourself dressed, yeah, throw some waffles in the toaster. Um it's just like getting her to understand like this safety stuff about microwaves and toasters more than anything. Okay. So, but she's been doing great. So does the chore chart literally say like put toast in the toaster? No, it says make my own breakfast. Oh, okay. And as long as she like makes an effort, you know, and like I'm still cutting her pancakes because she's like, I don't, I'm not gonna cut them right, you know. Yeah, stuff like that's fine. But at least she's doing the majority of it herself. She's pouring her own milk, she's doing all of that herself. Yeah. So she's been making her bed every morning when she gets up. Um, she makes her own breakfast, she gets herself dressed, and she brushes her teeth. Okay. Should be handled by her. Now, what is this chore to heart like? Does she move a little token for each tour that she does? No, it was $10 on Amazon. It has like 35 weekly sheets on it. So it's like gonna last us for a long time. Okay. And there are, I think, seven spots where you can write a chore. So once she's like mastered something. You can write your own chores. Yes. Okay. The next week you could switch it. And then it has for the whole week, it has a sticker goal. So I think there was like 40, I don't remember, like 47 spots for stickers or something like that. And I said, let's try to get 40, because this was our first week doing it. And she got it. So she got to get her Barbie toy. This week she wants to make brownies if she gets 42 stickers. Okay. So it's given us a routine too, because over summer, like we don't do day camps or anything like that. She has no routine. Yeah. And like kids like routines. So it's given her something to do. And honestly, she likes it. Yeah. And there's also like, we put like cleanup after yourself. So, like, that includes like throwing out your popsicle stick after you eat your popsicle, not just leaving it on the coffee table and putting her clothes in the laundry basket. I'm sick of it. That is a tough one. And it's so easy. That is like as hard as putting that drink on that coaster. I know. And that's honestly the one that like trips her up the most. Yes. Yeah. Because she leaves them on the floor right by the camper. Yeah. Now, are you gonna ever switch to like an allowance? Like every week you get a dollar. I don't remember. Are you gonna keep doing like this stuff is stuff that you should be doing? Like, because you're six, like, yes, we're rewarding you for this, but when you're 14, no, I don't want to be giving you $10 a week for brushing your teeth and like putting the dishes in the dishwasher. Well, yeah, but that will change. Then it will change to like take the trash out and drive mommy to get a margarita. Yeah. That's a good idea. So I was talking to another parent about allowances and they had a good point. They're like, if it's something that you should just be doing, I'm not giving you an allowance for that, but like I don't there was like a big storm and there was a bunch of sticks in their yard. And they said, Got it. If you pick up sticks for 30 minutes, I'll give you five bucks. Yeah. And their six-year-old was like, This is incredible. Yeah, I'm rich now. Yeah. What am I gonna buy? And so I think that is like a good point. Okay. You could argue that what I'm doing is an allowance in another form, but also it's not gonna be a toy every time. Like she literally wants to make brownies. Yeah, and you do too, probably. So it worked out. That is something I could eat an entire bowl of brownie batter. It's on my death row meal for sure. A brownie Sunday. No, I want the batter. Oh, or the batter. No, I would take the batter too. I would eat the batter. Yeah. I actually want that right now. The batter? Can't make that with cottage cheese. Although I'm sure someone actually has. Yeah. My mouth is watering. You do. Yep. So that's what we've been doing. What's new with you? Not much. I haven't really been doing a lot of anything. It's like the beginning part of summer when it's still hot. It's so hot that you want to get in the water and you get in the water and you're freezing cold. You know what I mean? Some of our pools around me aren't even open yet. Oh, ours are. Yeah. And I had bought that membership. So we like went a couple days ago. I mean, my nipples were hard. Yeah. And they were frozen and you could flick them and they'd fly off. That's it. That was the day of the nipples. And this is the hardest part, I guess, too, about being a stay-at-home mom or being like our situation where you're a stay-at-home mom during the day and then you work is my husband's out there. So now I'm like taking the kids to all these places by myself. And he's I can't like make him, I can't be like, I birthed him, so you have to get in the freezing cold water. So now I'm getting in the freezing cold water and it's horrible. And they can't, they're not old enough that I can just like sit in a lounge chair and be like, go play and watch them from afar. I'm getting in the water. Yeah. And so I'm really what I'm really excited for it to get a little bit warmer because it's hot. You want to get in the water and then you're just freezing cold.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01All the time. So cold. But they're hot. So they want to go to the splash park and the splash pad. And I swear we've been everywhere we could be already, like water related, already in the first week of summer being out. Mm-hmm. And why are kids never cold? They're never cold. Like Mila's lips are purple. And she's like, I don't want to get out. Yeah, we have to leave. I'm like, I have to, yeah. Then go, I'm we have to go to the hospital now. Yeah. Because you have hypothermia. And they truly are just so resilient. And I'm frigid. My God. You know what that makes me think of? I feel like I've talked about this before. You never watch the prequels to Yellowstone. No. Did you? 1913 or whatever. Did you ever watch Yellowstone? One episode. I know. And a few reels on Instagram. The way that Marco and I know the Detton family tree. Yeah. Deeply. Yeah. But this is like a kind of a spoiler, but they weren't main characters. But this couple in the 1923 spinoff, they freeze to death in their car. It's a lovely couple. And because of a, they got they ran out of gas in a snowstorm. They were trying to get the girl that was in love with the one Dutton to Montana. And they were from Chicago. Long convoluted story short. She ended up like connecting with this couple. And they're like, we will drive you there. We we like you're in love with him. We'll get you there. We'll get you there. It was 1923. They didn't like have like a car, which they didn't. There weren't snow plows. No, they had a car, but it like was like a Model T. So Okay. Yeah. And they and the people like they stopped, I remember, for gas or something like that. And the people were like, You're not, I don't know what you're thinking. Like the the people there said that, and they were like, Oh, that's silly. And then they froze to death. But what about the girl that was? She didn't freeze to death. So she just was like, so sorry, bye. No, she like woke up and was like, I'm almost froze, but I didn't. Yeah. And then just what? And she had to like take their clothes off of them and put them on her. And she made it to the guy she loved. No, she died. On the way there still? Oh my god. It was so darn. Was there no happy ending? I mean, it is the 1920s. A lot of shit was happening. Yeah, it was it wasn't a good time. But what was a good thing was that the main guy in it is the uh crap, the actor from um Yeah. House House Maine. I know, you tell me. Delicious. If I'd watch it, I'd watch it for that. You should watch it for that. I don't know. Would I have to watch? Do I have to watch the prequel before the regular? I don't think that you would have to have to watch the regular. Can I just watch the prequel? I think you could watch the prequels, but you'd have to start at the 1893 or whatever first. Okay. With Tim and Faith. Should we get into it? Let's get right inner. This week we're talking about our summer mishaps. Not to be confused with vacation nightmares. This is things that happened to you over the summer. Yeah. That were crazy. And you guys wrote in yours and I'll tell you mine. And do you have one? You've had no crazy incidents. I can't think of one that happened to my kids, but I was recently telling this story about when my sister and I were in high school and we decided to not wear sunscreen, even though my mom told us to. Were you there when I was talking about this? No. Oh, it was bad. Like fourth degree burn or like you had to go to the hospital? We probably should have. Yeah. It was like the kind of thing where when we I remember because we were on vacation and when we like stopped at an IHOP or something and walked in, everyone was like staring at us because we looked ridiculous. Yeah, like so bad. My mom was so mad. So you was your mom like, okay, honey, put sunscreen on. You guys are like, yeah, we will. And you just didn't. Yeah. And then just burnt to a crisp. Yes. How old were you? High school. Okay. No, yeah. I think I was a freshman in high school. And she still was this like Florida sun? It was South Carolina. And she and the whole drive home was miserable. You're just sitting in this. Yes. Did you have blisters? Yeah. And she would have to spray us with dermoplast. Wow. So bad. So your first encounter with dermoplast wasn't in the hospital having a baby. No. It was in ninth grade. I just remember standing in like the rest stop bathrooms and just like standing like a prisoner, like in our undies. And she'd just spray us and we would just cry. That was horrible. Like as a mom now, wouldn't you be so pissed? Yes. If now I was like, if there, if you were like gonna tell me you were six, whatever, like now I feel kind of bad for you. Ninth grade. She literally said, put the sunscreen on. Yeah, do not forget. Yeah. And you guys are pale people. No, we're pale. You're not like gonna get a tan. No. And we're like, nah, fuck that sunscreen. See, my sister and I tan pretty easily. We're not pale people, but uh like your white walker or skinwalker. Like, what do they call those? What'd they call the zombies? Yeah. What'd they call the zombies from what was that zombie movie that was so popular? Twilight? No, that's vampires. Oh no, walking dead. Walking dead. Were they called like white walkers or skinwalkers? I have no idea. Because they're really pale. Or maybe that is what they call the vampires from Twilight. Anyways, we tan pretty easily. And my sister and I used to tan with bait. This is bad. I will say this is bad now that I'm an adult. But we would tan in in our front yard in baby oil and we would put random objects. Like, you know how people always had like the Playboy bunny and put it on their pelvis in the corner and create like a little tattoo?
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01But we were poor and we didn't have the means to get Playboy Bunny tattoos. So we would just put random shit on the corner of our pelvis. Like what? Like a pretzel, like one of those mini pretzels. Or just work? Yeah. Literally would just put anything and just create tattoos with our baby oil. Were you just on your concrete driveway? Well, we lived- We used to do that. We lived in a trailer park, which is fitting for Kami and I just in the front yard with a pretzel on your head. With a pretzel on our head. Yeah. But no, we were in the grass. Yeah. I remember just laying on a towel on concrete. That's horrible. Yeah. Like never would be front yard. Never would I ever right now be like, you know what I'm gonna do on my day off? I'm gonna go lay on concrete. Yeah. And just like burn to a crisp. Yeah, but that was the vibe. I do like laying out. I do. I like sitting by the beach under an umbrella as Ellie goes. Yeah. I just like I like feeling the heat and then getting in the water and feeling the heat and getting in the water. Yeah. I like that vibe. And if you tan, then that's different. I don't really tan. Yeah. So you're like, this is gonna be stupid. I might as well just be under the umbrella. I'm just pale. It's not in the cards for me. Yeah. So that's it. Okay, that's a horrible story. What a mishap for you. Mine's also my childhood. I don't really have any summer mishaps with my kids, but I've only had them for six summers so far. So Well, you only get 12 fucking videos. No, I actually saw the TikTok. I think we talked about this, but I said somebody said you only get like the first, like the summer before kindergarten is the last summer with your kids ever. I literally skip right past this. Like my mom probably wishes she only got 12 summers with me. I'm like, what are y'all doing today? I know. She's like, you're only five and you're still like Costco. Yeah. Good. I love that for you. No, mine was um well, I do have a little one about Julian, but it's kind of similar. He was in the pool and he had a swim diaper on, but he had had blackberries. Have you ever had your baby poop blackberries? Do you remember what this looks like? No, it looks like I mean they poop the blackberry seeds out and it's watery. Those swim diapers are they'll they're traitors, yeah. Honestly. Like they're not, you can't rely on them. Maybe if it would have been like an actual formed poop. It never is in the water. It never is. No. And blackberries nonetheless. And he was in the pool with for swim lessons and he had a swim diaper on. We did ISR, infant swim rescue. You did? Yeah. So he was like a baby. I don't know if I knew this. Yeah, we did. And I wish we would have done it for Mila, but we got poorer. It got more expensive. One of the different, one of the two. We didn't have that money. So we just now we just throw her in and we show her how to flip. Okay. Don't didn't you go like every day? Yes. And it's like 10 minutes? Yes. It sounds like you don't have a lot of questions. You're just making that's insane to me. It was like every day for 10 minutes only. And it was for what, six weeks or something? And he learned how to float on his back. And then the very last class or the last two classes, we brought him fully clothed. And she he learned how to flow fully clothed on his back. Okay. And then we did it again when he was the next summer. We did ISR round two. And that one, he was what, like one or two, almost two, maybe. And in that one, they teach you how to float on your back. They also teach you how to swim, like float on your back, swim a couple strokes, float on your back, swim a couple strokes until he can reach the ledge to then pull himself up. So they just add like floating on your back and swimming a couple steps. So what was that like as a mom to watch? It was hard for the first, you know, like week or two when he is just because they really acclimatize. They really acclimate them to have you seen that video? No. The the girls in the water. She's like, this is how you get into a cold ocean and she's got her hands up like this, like by her head, like you're making a goalpost with your hands. And she's like, acclimatize, acclimatize. And she sticks like a hand each time in the water. Then she sticks both, acclimatize. And then she goes like fully under acclimatize. It's so funny. Then I do acclimatize, like. But, anyways, it was hard because they really just go right into it. Like from like day one, she's like dunking his head up, down and up real quick, just to get his face used to the water. And he's of course crying because he's a baby and he hates it. But then by like week two or three, he wasn't, he wasn't afraid to get in the water. He was smiling at the teacher and he was floating on his back. And I have a lot of anxiety as a parent. And the other thing is, my husband can't swim. So if he's ever near a body of water with my kids and the kids fall in, he's drowning to save them. Like it's not helping anybody because he literally can't even float. I mean, I'm not saying this to shade you, honey, but he can't even do ISR for no easy. I want to so bad. Actually, the YMCA does adult swim lessons, and I've almost signed him up like as a surprise so many times. No, I want to do adult ISR. ISR. It probably pretty much is. Like learned, but so I I had a lot of anxiety around water. Like I don't, if they're by themselves and something happens, and and drowning is the leading cause of death in children, I think, under age four. Yeah, it is. So as much as he hated it for the first week or so, then he did so much better. Yeah. He could float on his back, and I felt so much safer. No, it is it's great. It was working. Both of my kids are past ISR times. I feel like it would have been really stressful as a mom, though. It was hard the first week or so. But it's harder for me, someone with anxiety, knowing that it wasn't being done. And like if he falls in, he's totally hurt himself. That was harder for me. The dealing with the intrusive thoughts was gonna be harder. Now, if you're someone who's like, I have no intrusive thoughts, I have no anxiety, like whatever, then you probably would be like, that's not worth it. But I think that everyone with a pool should do that. Oh, for sure. Yeah. Or at least some kind of swim lessons and water safety. Yeah, very important. But and I really wish we could have done it for Mila. It just is super expensive. And so obviously, not everyone can do it. Yeah. Because it's expensive to to start it, and then you have to pay for the week, like weekly. Yeah. You're paying. So but anyway, so he shit a bunch of blackberries in the pool. And at least he was in there by himself. And you're not supposed to feed them like maybe an hour prior because of this reason and stuff, and they don't want them to puke. And and it was just her and yeah, him and the instructor, and he shit a bunch of blackberries, and it was so embarrassing. Just blackberry seeds coming out of his diaper as he's floating down the pool. I know. And then my most embarrassing story about myself, actually, my summer mishap. It wasn't even the prompt wasn't embarrassing stories, but they both happened to be embarrassing to me. Was when I was younger, probably eight, ten, eight to ten. Um, we were at our local pool and I puked in the pool. I think I just swallowed too much water. And also I have a sensitive stomach. And they had to get and they had to take everybody out of the pool. Everybody had to get out of the pool. And they had to shut it down so that they could clean up my puke. And I'm sure those eight-year-olds were shooting daggers at my eyeballs. You wrecked their neck. Because I wrecked like at least 30 minutes for these kids. Everyone's sitting out in their towels, staring at me, and I'm just staring at them back, like, I'm so sorry. Did you just skitter away? I would have laughed. I think I just like puked and then was like, I don't know what to do. And then the lifeguards probably blew the whistles and are like, Everybody out! We gotta puke her in the yellow suit. Yeah, you in the tankini. Raise your hand. Not the tankini. Did you wear a tankini? Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Okay, I'm gonna read your guys' now. I feel like I'm losing my voice again. I know. I haven't been taking my Zertec in like a summer. I I have to bring mine twice a day right now. I think they're bad. The allergies are bad again. But, anyways, my son lost his swim trunks on a water slide. By the time he reached the bottom, he was crying. I was laughing, and the lifeguard was fetching his Spider-Man bottoms. LOL. I wonder how old he is. Probably old enough. Well, he said Spider-Man swim trunks. He can't be that old. But he was I'm guessing five to nine.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's old enough.
SPEAKER_01Old enough to go down a water slide and have no. Now, did he have chonis on? Do you have a little bare undies on underneath? Chony. Chones is how you say underwear in Spanish. Oh, she's bilingual. Yes, sí, senorita. So my kids call him. They don't know the word underwear. That's like the only. My kids are half Mexican because my husband. And that is like the only one of the few words they know in Spanish that they don't, that they don't know in English or that they know even at all. Do they say kisses or do they say besitos?
SPEAKER_00Kisses.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Uh but then sometimes I'll say your tonies. And so now Mila will be like, I gotta go get my tonies. Okay, that's really cute. We say panties, and people said I shouldn't say that. Why? Because they said it's like sexual. I'm like, really? That's what we called them all growing up. I don't think panties is sexual. No. That's like saying brawl is sexual and you should call it a brassiere. I feel like brassiers are more sexual.
unknownOh, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01My dad called it an over-the-shoulder boulder holder. Oh yeah. Yeah. Classic. Yeah. Okay. But, anyways, all right. Poor kid. I hope he was wearing Tony's. Okay. I was feeling like a super organized mom and slathered slathered everyone in sunscreen before heading to the splash pad. After being there a while, I realized I accidentally used white diaper cream instead. My kids look like Victorian ghosts running through the sets. How did you mix that up though?
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01I'm not hating on you. That was rude. No, it's fine. Because sunscreen has zinc oxide in it, and that's mostly diaper cream. Really? Yeah. So it's fine. So if you were like out of diaper cream, you could put like some baby ganex on the butt? Maybe. Is zinc oxide what's in sunscreen? Is that what you're saying? Yes. Wait, that's probably just what you said. That's literally exactly what I said. I zoned out when she said Victorian ghost. Well, I remember, and I'm not telling you to put sunscreen on your infant, but I remember my pediatrician saying, because I was like, hey, what should we do with Caleb? We're gonna go. And he was led on vacation, and he was like, You're not supposed to put sunscreen on technically until they're like six months. But she was like, a little bit of sunscreen is fine. Like, keep him out of there as much as you can, but it's mostly zinc oxide, and that's what diaper cream is. So what's the difference? Yeah. What there must is there another ingredient in sunscreen that makes it harmful? I don't know. Or is it just because you're putting a large quantity of it on because you're rubbing it all over their body instead of just their booty? Well, it's pretty much like a political statement if you're wearing sunscreen at all anymore because Do tell. Do tell. Wait, what? Unless we've talked about this, I feel like I've got water in the back of my mind. No, I've never heard this in my life. Please tell me. Oh, why? Because of all the chemicals in it. And we should just be using watermelon juice instead. So they say it's a natural sunscreen. You don't drink it. You rub it on your skin. Yes. I'm so curious about this and very skeptical. I mean, I'm not curious. Like, I know that's not gonna work. I want somebody to do a study on this. And also, how many people are getting a sunburn now because they're putting watermelon juice on their kids and their kids are looking like you in ninth grade. Yeah. That's actually crazy. Yeah, yeah. It's a whole thing. I can't believe you didn't know that. No, I didn't know that. Anywho's. It's on TikTok. Well, then it must be true. It's probably on the TikTok. Yeah. If you go to Google.com on the World Wide Web, you might find it. My kids have never had a sunburn, but they're half Mexican, like I said. Oh, yeah. I was like, wow, this is a flex. But no, it is kind of a flex, but also I do put sunscreen on them. I'm not like, yeah, just because you're brown, you you know, will be fine. They do get super dark nonetheless. Yeah. And they've never but they've never had a sunburn. Now, they've had like pink cheeks from being in the sun. Their cheeks always get really like pink after being on the sun all day, but they've never had a sunburn. And yeah, I don't know. That's it. That's all I got to say about that. Okay. Also, my yes bag that I mentioned and maybe last week or the week before. Yeah. It's going spectacular. For example, yesterday I was at a cookout with my family, and someone said, Oh my god, I wish we had chalk. And I said, My yes bag has chalk. I'll be right back. And I bought all my chalk, and they were like, You keep chalk in your trunk. And I was like, Yeah, why not? Yes. It's in my yes bag. Yes, I do. Keep chalk in my trunk. Thank you very much. Let's see. I've already missed the ice cream truck twice. By the time my kids run in and get me, it's already past us. At least I'm not paying $8 for an ice cream gun. The fucking ice cream truck. Gets me in a lot of trouble. I am over this ice cream truck. We've never seen an ice cream truck in our neighborhood. And this summer, it's like if you're on a walk on a Sunday evening, you're seeing the ice cream truck. Yeah. And Nora's like, there it is again. And it's playing like, it's a small world, it's like blaring. And I'm like, I'm not paying for that. Ours was playing happy birthday the other day. Julian's like, does somebody get that for their birthday? I was like, no, and why the fuck are they doing that? Yeah, no. It's a no first of all, it's annoying because they're like $8 for an ice cream cone that we probably already have in the freezer. Yeah, you do. The same drumstick. Second of all, here comes all the kids in the cul-de-sac with their dollars. And I'm like, okay, so everyone's gonna get a drumstick, and my kids just gonna be standing there staring at it. And I'm gonna say we have ice cream at home. Like, and we're happy, well, we are at home. So that's even more annoying. That's annoying. And three, that was it. That was my only two brievances. You know what? It kind of leads me to think though. So hear me out. You know how like everybody does a lemonade stand? What if we went to Costco and we bought a bunch of ice cream bars and our kids sold them for like $2 a pop? Yeah, and an ice cream stand. They make a lot of money, I bet. Do you know what I want to do? And I don't know if I've said this before, but I tell Noe every summer, I'm gonna, I'm like dead serious. Okay, maybe I shouldn't say this on the podcast because someone's gonna steal my idea and they're gonna make all the money. I don't know. Uh, you don't live in my town, so you should be fine. I don't know anybody that listens that lives in my town, besides my sister-in-law, and she would never steal my ideas. I said, I want to get a food truck and turn it into a coffee, a mobile coffee truck, and then I'm gonna drive around all these suburban neighborhoods. Oh, yeah. For the moms. Yes. And I'm following the ice cream truck, baby. Who music are you gonna blare? Like Cardi B and Fetty Wap now that he's out of prison. And what attracts the suburban moms to the truck? Probably, you know, Shaggy wasn't me. Like, but you can't play the actual song. You have to be like the ice cream trucks, you have to play like the instrumental. Yeah. Bridgerton music. Yeah. Anyways, I'm gonna drive behind the ice cream truck. Or I'm or what if you like at like school pickup times, you know, like 7:30, 8 o'clock, you just start driving around these neighborhoods where the moms are all waiting at the bus stop with their kids. No, that's and you just pull up to the bus stop and everybody gets an iced coffee and gets to go back to their house. Yeah. Isn't this and then you're done? It's like a school bus. Like you just do it in the morning and you do it in the afternoon and then you're done. And you just, I mean, I don't know the licensing, but this is like a solid plan for me. So that's just it. I don't think that there is there any, like, can the I don't know, who monitors restaurants? How can you come to like your truck? Not that I'm suggesting you're gonna have rats in your coffee truck, but I just mean like that kind of weirds me out about an ice cream truck. Yeah, and also like how do they know of any licensing at all? Like, you'd have to what pull them over, like a cop would have to pull them over and be like, let me see your licensing. That's just it. I think you can just start rolling. Yeah, I mean, what are the rules here? I don't know. If you're not parked, you can't catch me. Well, okay, but put stickers on the coffee cups for mama needs a minute. Yes. I'm gonna have the merch. Like, you know, when you go buy a merch at a concert. At least we do this together and then they'll get to know. Mama needs a coffee? Mama needs a coffee. Yes. And I'll split the properties with you 70-30. Okay. Yeah. It's a plan. Okay. Great. That's it. Okay.
SPEAKER_00I mean, we could yap for hours, but.
SPEAKER_01But this is where we'll end it. Yeah. Great. Happy flag day, everyone. On the 14th. What does that even mean? I don't know. Oh my god, it's June. We have an address. Happy Pride. Yeah. Love is love. We just lost one listener. You shouldn't have been here to begin with. I agree. Happy pride, mom. Happy Pride. When is the indie pride parade? I don't know, but it's a jolly good time. I've heard. Yeah. I've never made it down there. You should go. I know. It's fun. If someone was like, well, how are you gonna explain to your kids like the half-naked people? Which is just the dumbest thing you could say. Why would I what would I do at the beach? That's what I said. I said probably be wearing the same clothes they would have been wearing at the pool. Yeah, maybe even more a little. No, it was an absolutely family-friendly parade. Yeah, I've seen lots of family members. It's mostly just businesses and handing out candy. And I mean, one flow was handing out condoms. They obviously didn't hand them to my kids. Yeah. Kept rolling and they thought nothing of it. So yeah, it's a great time. You should go. Okay. Yeah, cheers. Next week is Father's Day weekend. Happy Father's Day. Yeah. So we will be talking about daddies. Oh, our baby daddies. Cheer. Yeah. I hope everyone has a good weekend. See you in a minute.