UV23 - ASH (2025)

Join Chris and Charlie as they throw rocks into weird alien holes and are surprised when something bad happens

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Yes. As I walk through the uncanny valley of death, you're not evil. Or I am not evil. Oh wait, no, he's not famous. Okay, Winston Winston wasn't famous, but he was a cat that I saw so much I was like, he's he's famous. And then I saw the the follower account and I was like, oh no one no one follows Winston. Poor Winston the cat. I'm trying to find photos of him where he doesn't look very ill because for the last few months he was pretty rough for them. Probably better send it to your actual messages and not chat messages, aren't they? Yeah. So look that's a very that's a very specific cat. Aww. Oh, yeah. But now there's a stickers up a second Gumbus has also hit the tower. Someone has found a cat that looks identical to Gumbus.

SPEAKER_04 1:09

That's the way to put it.

SPEAKER_00 1:12

Honestly, Joey, we should uh maybe we should just pivot to internet cats. I've got a lot on them. Have you ever seen uh Sister Mini? The No Is she is she a Hindi or Muslim? She's one or the other, but she's she's always getting done up in her fancy religious outfits and praying.

SPEAKER_01 1:30

I have not seen this. I I've not seen any internet cats except for what you showed me.

SPEAKER_00 1:35

Just follow more in our cat. Oh, you didn't know what mini bopper was. A mini bopper is just uh it's it's like a really bad quality footage of like I think it's Polish or Czechoslovakia, and it's somewhere in Eastern Europe where a man finds um what even animal is that? See like if I say what fucking animal is that? It's like a gopher, isn't it?

SPEAKER_04 2:02

I the Jeff that that has a duck in it, the of shaking.

SPEAKER_00 2:09

Oh the one after it. The one after it.

SPEAKER_01 2:14

Like uh I guess a gopher or like a mole rat or something.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Well he's big, no, he's a he's a big boy. But he he's the Polish person finds him and goes, tiddy bummer, pity bummer, and then picks him up and dances with him. This like shell-shot wild animal that just has no clue what's going on. I love Eastern Europeans. There's another one where it's like he finds someone it's another Eastern European that finds like a big rat or something and goes, oh teeny bopper, teeny bopper. And I don't think they're the same person. I just I love their voice. Oh, would you look at that for you's out?

SPEAKER_03 3:03

Oh, what's Theo up to?

SPEAKER_00 3:07

He's acting like he wants out his cage despite the fact that he's had so much social time today. I I I went back and I played with him for a bit because I was I was at Pets at home and I was like, damn, I could get another hamster right now if I really wanted. But I I restrained. It was fucked up seeing the other series, man.

SPEAKER_04 3:29

They were all I admire your restraint.

SPEAKER_00 3:31

They're about the size of Field's ass. I don't know how Field is so fucking big.

SPEAKER_04 3:39

He's big for a hamster.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

He's obscenely big for a hamster. Oh fuck. Oh wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on, I think I might have spotted it. I've I've gave him you get sprays, which are plants that hamsters like in the wild you could put in a house. And he likes them, but I think he realize you can knock one down like a tree and make it a ramp. Yeah, he has, hold on. Every single time, man. During Ash I couldn't watch the entire fucking movie because every five seconds you were doing something, weren't you?

SPEAKER_04 4:15

What was he up to during the movie?

SPEAKER_00 4:17

Get a scapitus. I had to take his wheel away. Hello.

SPEAKER_03 4:24

Well, yeah, you're the warden, you gotta.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Oh, your voice scared the shit out of him. Never mind, he's not on the phone. I don't know, maybe the vibrations of your voice like buddy's arse or something, but he wasn't happy with it.

SPEAKER_03 4:39

I feel he's trying to eat the speaker. What's he doing? He's trying to eat the speaker.

SPEAKER_00 4:47

You can't press it, we man. Go back to what you're doing. Well, he probably wants streets at nighttime. Hold on.

SPEAKER_01 4:54

Alright, we're doing a hamster detour.

SPEAKER_00 4:57

We always get the hamster. It's like actually.

SPEAKER_01 4:59

Actually, while you're while you're feeding him, what's up? We're like four or five minutes in. I'm gonna just cut this little bit. I'm gonna go close the window because I can tell that it's getting picked up on the mic.

SPEAKER_00 5:10

There you go. Snack one.

SPEAKER_04 5:12

Snack two.

SPEAKER_02 5:14

There's no more snack.

SPEAKER_00 5:16

What do we do?

SPEAKER_04 5:18

Give him more, you want more. Do we do anything to sync up?

SPEAKER_00 5:24

But do you mean it's sync up what with the movie in the background? Oh true.

SPEAKER_03 5:28

All that yeah, let me put that in the background.

SPEAKER_00 5:32

So what do you mean? Do we do anything to sync up? Why would we need to sync up?

SPEAKER_03 5:43

Why else? Why else would we do it? Why else might we don't want to do it? What's wrong with that? What did we watch? Anaconda? Avatar fire and an action.

SPEAKER_04 6:28

All right, all is well in wherever.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

You know what I'm thinking about? We have avoided both the wailing and the substance. Purely for the length. And then I have went out and purchased a movie for it. Not realizing it is the exact same length as both of those movies.

SPEAKER_03 6:53

Yeah, well. Now we're here.

SPEAKER_00 6:57

And they all get with the the substance? The the wailing?

SPEAKER_01 7:02

The good movies. They're all good movies.

SPEAKER_00 7:05

Apparently there's a Japanese movie from the 60s. I've I've heard of before, but I don't know what's horror called. Quieran? That's three hours. Ah, fuck it, mate. Yeah. Oh shit, this movie. It's the one that like it looks an awful lot like Incantation. It's about samurai.

SPEAKER_03 7:27

I've not heard of that.

SPEAKER_00 7:29

No, this looks sick. Oh wait, maybe we should Brotherhood of the Wolf. Maybe next week do Onibaba. Because I've still not seen Onibaba. And it's Willem Defoe's favourite film. I imagine he's got good taste.

SPEAKER_04 7:49

His favourite film?

SPEAKER_01 7:51

What's up with Onibaba?

SPEAKER_00 7:54

It's just like a Japanese I think it's a samurai uh like demon movie from like I think also the 60s. That sounds pretty good. It's the one that like they remade recently with um Jon Snow and his sister, but they're fucking in it, and everyone's like, that's weird, why did you agree to a script? But you're fucking the person that was your sister for like 10 years.

SPEAKER_04 8:19

What's that called? The new the same thing?

SPEAKER_00 8:23

No, they they Americanized it, they made it like a a William Shakespeare thing. Uh what's that fucker's name? What's Jon Snow's name? The cunt that ruins everything he's in.

SPEAKER_03 8:37

Kid Harrington.

SPEAKER_00 8:38

Silent Hill Revelations 2. No, Revel Silent Hill 2 or Silent Hill Rev That cunt, what's his name?

SPEAKER_04 8:47

Kit Harrington.

SPEAKER_00 8:49

Kit Harrington, hold on. Like a fucking smug. He looks in his photo, it comes up. Good god. It's called The Dreadful! It was out this year with uh 36% on Rotten Tomatoes.

SPEAKER_03 9:03

The Dreadful. Interesting.

SPEAKER_00 9:06

Roger E. Murphy Watch. You you uh you know how how hard it would be to convince me to watch anything with Kit Harrington in it.

SPEAKER_01 9:19

Yeah. We should watch both we should watch four and a half hours of movie.

SPEAKER_00 9:26

But I hate him and I hate Adrian Brody. But at least I know if I put an Adrian Brody movie, it's probably going to be at least okay.

SPEAKER_03 9:37

Yeah, Adrian Brody.

SPEAKER_00 9:39

I hate this person, and it's definitely going to be one of the worst films I've ever seen.

SPEAKER_04 9:45

He makes bad movies.

SPEAKER_00 9:54

For my name.

SPEAKER_03 9:55

No, no, just prove his he's uh what he does for them.

SPEAKER_00 9:59

Even Eternals, Chloe Jell. How how did he get Chloe Jell in a Marvel movie? And it's shit. I guarantee is because he was in it. He touched the script and it just fell fucking pieces.

SPEAKER_04 10:12

I like Eternals.

SPEAKER_00 10:15

I fell asleep I think three times in the cinema was watching that movie. The only thing I can remember is is is on like a cult in the woods, and then Baraki Yogan's like, oh look at my eyes. I've got big blue eyes.

SPEAKER_04 10:33

So something close enough to that.

SPEAKER_00 10:36

And then it's like it's like I remember, oh no, no, no, no. The the see the Speedy Girl? The Speedy Girl fucks. Speedy Girl looks crazy good. You wanna do Eternals next week? No, I do not want to do Eternals next week. Not at all. I saw anything.

SPEAKER_01 10:54

This week we're talking about Ash from 2025, directed by a Flying Lotus.

SPEAKER_00 11:00

I like that anytime I go on a rant, you just you cut me off with a different sentence.

SPEAKER_03 11:07

It's a superpower that I Chris Ash.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Why why would you suggest Ash of all films?

SPEAKER_04 11:16

I just wanted to watch it. I didn't know a ton about it.

SPEAKER_00 11:22

It's always your thing. You're never like, oh, I heard about it through this, or oh, this person was just it was a film. It was a film that existed.

SPEAKER_04 11:31

What do you think?

SPEAKER_00 11:33

Well, but before we go into what we thought, because I see you've not rated it on Letterboxd yet. Flying Lotus. You're you're the music guy. Are you the flying lotus music guy?

SPEAKER_01 11:47

I'm not familiar with Flying Lotus.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

You're not? You made that a point like last week. You were like, oh, and it's my Flying Lotus. As if it was like a big a big pool for you.

SPEAKER_01 11:58

Well, I'm I'm familiar with him conceptually, that he is an artist and has directed. And this is. Is it one person?

SPEAKER_00 12:10

It is one person. I thought it was two people for whatever reason.

SPEAKER_01 12:14

No, it's a dude. Just not with their actual work beyond this movie. Which I wanted to watch because it's Aaron Paul in a sci-fi horror movie.

SPEAKER_00 12:31

See, for me, Flying Lois, I've not heard too much of them, but I always hear huge critical acclaim. And anytime I've heard any of her songs, I'm just it's just kind of like it's okay. It's like it's fine. None of her productions ever wild me. I always find it kind of like muddied. Like it's it feels like there's a good beat, but it isn't mixed properly. I always feel like I'm kind of struggling to hear what's going on.

SPEAKER_01 13:01

Is what they're doing impressive for one person?

SPEAKER_00 13:05

Well, I mean it's a producer. Most people are it's it's 2026, Chris. Most people are producing by themselves.

SPEAKER_03 13:12

Yeah, it's true.

SPEAKER_00 13:15

But I feel like my opinions of his mediocrity also goes into this movie. I feel like this movie is it is almost the definition of all style and no substance. Because it's I imagine see if you were high as fuck watching this movie, it would be an incredible experience. But unfortunately, I was not. I was in my room fighting with my hamster who decided he was going to do another note every single second of this movie. So I may I have brought notes for once, Chris, but I may there's a couple of moments that I have not because I rewound this like five times, and then by the six, I was refusing. It wasn't happening anymore. But Chris, well, what was your thoughts on um on Ash?

SPEAKER_04 14:12

I agree that it was all style, no substance.

SPEAKER_01 14:17

I liked it for the most part. Because it looks really nice, and because there's I don't know. Uh there's a lot of good visuals in it. That's the same thing. I I like the the gore and the the death effects in some scenes. In addition to the uh cinematic visuals.

SPEAKER_00 14:46

Well de well, there's definitely some cool scenes, and imagine we'll we'll talk about one when we get but I think watching it you can tell like this is like it's it's it's a music video, it's like it's eye candy, and there's like a vague plot going on, but for I don't feel like the the qualities of that could carry it for it's only like an hour and a half, wasn't it?

SPEAKER_01 15:13

It was and it felt longer than that.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

It felt so much longer than that, when nothing happened. Was it mac and cheese? Chris, that fucked me up. I was like overeating mac and cheese, and but it was like it was bullish.

SPEAKER_01 15:34

I don't know, I thought it was mac and cheese, which is very funny to me. Maybe it's not.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

Well, you say that as if the the crew outside of our main two protagonists are even remotely characters in this film.

SPEAKER_04 15:51

And I mean, are we talking spoilers from the start?

SPEAKER_00 15:54

Okay, always talk. There's no point. What are we gonna do? We're gonna go. She woke up, she had a look about, then she had a look about again, and then she kept looking for a lot.

SPEAKER_01 16:07

Yeah, so I mean to say that there's only one main character, really, because one is a hallucination or uh you know, an image motherfucker. Give me one second, let me check it out. Alright, that's the second thing, but that's let me make a note.

SPEAKER_03 16:57

You trickable. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 17:02

I refuse to feel man, just got a fucking bed, please.

SPEAKER_04 17:10

He knows what he has to do.

SPEAKER_03 17:13

Alright. There we go. Action.

SPEAKER_00 17:19

You say action, you were you were the one speaking.

SPEAKER_01 17:22

Yeah, I forgot what I was talking about. I got distracted by yelling at my dog.

SPEAKER_00 17:28

Uh you're talking about there's only one character.

SPEAKER_01 17:32

There's only one character. Uh, because one of them is a hallucination or well, the virus, a manifestation of the virus. And she's infected through the present-day course of the movie. I do like the the the scenes of the attack in the base. And I I wish that was more of the movie, and there was some maybe the wraparound story could be shorter, and there could still be the uh vagueness about what's going on with her, but the movie itself could be more about what's happening in the base, or you know, who's going to survive. Making a movie like this and not giving the audience the suspense of who's going to live or die just feels like a mistake in making a narrative. There's a lot of references to alien, there's a lot of the you know, the they they talk about protocols, which is very alien. There's a the shot where they're eating mac and cheese, they do a roundabout shot on the table, which looks like something out of alien. The surgical machine seems like something from Prometheus.

SPEAKER_00 19:06

The spaces doesn't wrapped from Prometheus, like holy shit, it's a one-to-one.

SPEAKER_01 19:16

So making this a movie that's uh almost nostalgic about characters you've never met who have already died, rather than letting you live with them for a bit and be in suspense about what's going to happen, just feels like a mistake, and it does make the movie feel very slow and kind of either uncoordinated or undirected. I I like a lot of elements of it, I just think it's not put together in the right way.

SPEAKER_00 19:55

It's interesting you brought that up. The we've basically got like a base under siege murder mystery story, but everyone's already dead, so there's no stakes involved. Because you know that aside from our protagonist, and you don't even have the like you don't even set up the mystery as oh, how did they die? Because the answer that you see through the flashbacks, she killed them, so you go, okay, so that's answered. So I now have like a sort of sub-question of okay, but why did she kill them? And I don't really find it that interesting for some reason.

SPEAKER_01 20:38

I I have to I feel like the beginning of the film You shouldn't be the side question shouldn't be, or why do I care?

SPEAKER_00 20:48

Yeah, because like we set it up like it's like love crafting, because uh Chris can be talking about she wakes up okay in the base, and then the shots are like really super claustrophobic, so you can't really get a scale of where anything is, like there's no sense of uh positioning anywhere, uh and she wakes up with her hair, makeup, and nails perfectly done, which I feel like on a space exploration mission is the she would be carrying her her the chemicals and her makeup and her hairspray is because you don't get I feel like there's a kind of matrix like uh what's the word I'm looking for here? Like callback shots and alien, and in both of those films they sell the realism by having the characters be a bit greasy and their hair messed up and them just kind of chilling in their clothes. But no, she's got her fancy spacesuit and she's just out of the beauty salon, despite the fact that she's apparently just murdered a bunch of people. Okay, so that's already a strange start. Chris, what if Fuck's going on with these lights? What's how are you feeling about the fucking the lighting in this place?

SPEAKER_04 22:05

I love it.

SPEAKER_00 22:06

You love it?

SPEAKER_04 22:08

I love it.

SPEAKER_00 22:10

Oh what do you think?

SPEAKER_01 22:11

I fucking I see.

SPEAKER_00 22:13

I feel like the idea's cool. I like it.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

It's not realistic, but it's great.

SPEAKER_00 22:19

It's not visually it looks good. But then I'm like, okay, but why are the lights?

SPEAKER_01 22:25

It looks like uh Voyagers or like uh maybe hotel Artemis. I'm trying to think of movies that feel like this.

SPEAKER_00 22:33

Okay, but Chris she turns on the power, you see her do this, so that would mean for some reason this entire base is just lit this way all the time, and there's no sick because I was thinking, like, I have no idea where anything is or what every room is supposed to be, and I was like, surely you could get the same effect if you had like say the medical room be green, so when characters are rushing about, you know that that's the medical area, or have the hallways red, but it's not I feel like all the rooms kind of just mission match and the colours sometimes change between scenes. And it's like how are these people living this way?

SPEAKER_01 23:20

It seems like uh I'm watching it in the background right now.

SPEAKER_00 23:26

But how would you go about daily life in the blue room? How the fuck are you going to find things?

SPEAKER_04 23:33

These don't make any sense as colors for the spaceship. Or for the base.

SPEAKER_00 23:39

Okay, so she's got she's going through this and you she finds like the bodies, okay. She's going through these really, really cramped corridors, so you don't know what anything looks like. And then okay, she's got a space garden with a giant alien butthole. And I I don't I assume that this was going to come back, but it seemingly doesn't. And I don't know if I missed something with the big alien butthole.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

That you thought I have no clue what's up with the big alien butthole.

SPEAKER_00 24:18

And she doesn't seem to weirdied out by the alien butthole. Which is I don't I mean it's not something you see on a day-to-day basis.

SPEAKER_01 24:28

I understand it's a maybe she does, maybe they're used to it.

SPEAKER_00 24:33

Maybe I maybe that's what was taking out there. Because I'm not the the plot's so vague. About okay, so okay, set up, set up, set up. She has amnesia, okay. But she only has amnesia about plot relevant details so Aaron Paul can come explain it to us later. Okay, so that's the thing. But he also doesn't explain it in enough detail that it answers things. Because we we learned, okay, visa, this is we've Earth's dying, okay. So they've sent out six crews, I think it was, and they've all came up with deadly squat. So this is where last week. It is, but it's like exoplanets. So but why is Earth dying? And what are we looking for? When is this set? Why is she on the ship? I don't there's I guess a mystery movie.

SPEAKER_02 25:38

But why isn't there anything answered? No okay.

SPEAKER_00 25:45

Alien butthole aside, she walks out into this alien planet that has no oxygen and doesn't realize she's dying for about five minutes.

SPEAKER_01 25:59

That's that was crazy to me, is that she didn't know or even think that she might need some sort of protection from an atmosphere that is not Earth.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

Like I could get maybe she didn't remember she was on an alien planet. But again, the giant alieniness I think is a good visual indicator that this is not a safe place to be.

SPEAKER_03 26:30

It seems bad.

SPEAKER_04 26:31

It doesn't seem like a good place to be.

SPEAKER_00 26:34

This is how people say in Prometheus the scientists are stupid. This woman is presumably a scientist. Yeah, no, I guess she's got a little brain goo, but I still don't like surely the the aliens using her brain. Because like she had her person, so she must have her intelligence. Aaron Paul comes in and goes, Oh, you will still have your skill sets. Whatever that means, what are her skill sets? I don't know, Chris. Lady She is the late she's a hot lady. She's hard the the the visuals until we can get the plot going for a bit.

SPEAKER_03 27:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:24

What okay, I've seen contention online. What do you think of the acting in this?

SPEAKER_04 27:31

It's it's a good question.

SPEAKER_01 27:36

Mostly good.

SPEAKER_02 27:38

Mostly good.

SPEAKER_01 27:39

There were shots of Isaac Gonzalez where I thought that she physically looked like a high school drama actor. But the way that they frame her is very effective, and I think she's good when used well, which is not it's not meant to be an insult. I think a lot of actors are, and it's hard to act. I think Aaron Paul is mostly really good in this. I was surprised because he's not playing a character I'm used to.

SPEAKER_00 28:16

Oh, that's strange. I think we we have lip opinions in this, because I thought towards the end the acting was good. But I think you can really tell that this is a director that doesn't make movies. Because for some reason in the first, it must have been them just getting used to being on set, or maybe maybe the acting direction by Flying Lotus just wasn't helping at first. Because my fucking god, do these guys suck at the beginning? Like whole.

SPEAKER_04 28:58

Like the attack on the base.

SPEAKER_00 29:01

I feel like there's a split. I feel like the second that we get the dialogue interaction between both of them, where she admits that she knows she killed these people, but she doesn't know why, and she's bugging about her weird little uh Doctor Who emotion patches. I feel like for some reason that one scene, everything after that was perfectly fine. But up until then, good fucking god, it was it was uh I think you you nailed it on the head with like high school drama acting. Everyone was so flat there wasn't like Aaron Paul, he was delivering his lines poorly at first. Aaron Paul is a voice actor. What happened? My man's in Boy Jack person the entire runtime of this movie. I kept thinking, Jesse, why are you blue? See if he was another fucking blue lighting, and I don't know if that's not being used as a meme more.

SPEAKER_03 30:08

Should be. I'd like that.

SPEAKER_00 30:11

But uh he does get fucked up, he gets mashed like a little potato, like a little potato boy.

SPEAKER_01 30:20

I wish they gave him his character. They could've because his character is the one character you don't really know what happened to. You can still assume that he died, but you can more directly assume the rest of the crew died. This guy appeared out of nowhere. So seeing that he existed in the main story, you just sort of don't expressly know. And I feel like they could have used that for maybe two or three minutes of suspense, a little chase sequence.

SPEAKER_00 30:57

Yeah, it was strange because his body was inside the wall, was it not?

SPEAKER_01 31:02

But yeah, but then didn't it appear in the in the living room?

SPEAKER_00 31:09

Okay, so we'll go through recruit. Okay, so we have um we have our scientist guy. No, she definitely is a scientist because she's poking about with the little the little blobby boy from life that causes all this shit to go wrong.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

My dog is having a bad time. I'm gonna let him out of the kitchen. Give me one second.

SPEAKER_00 31:53

When you left something just went honk, honk honoring all that things. It's like you go off of a fucking like a clown chair or something. Okay, but uh the crew the crew deaths, we get our first infected guy and he gets stabbed a bunch, okay.

SPEAKER_01 32:24

Wait, what about the guy who gets his face fucking blasted off?

SPEAKER_00 32:30

Oh see this is why for some reason.

SPEAKER_01 32:36

Yeah, that's what I mean too.

SPEAKER_00 32:39

And it's very Prometheus, I like it. They're all fucking I the I hated the the dialogue interaction though between the two that are fucking because one of them makes a joke that about them fucking, and then for some reason every single crew member has to go, Whoa! Did they just make a joke that they're fucking? Hey guys, did you know they fuck? And it's like what's this weird incel energy coming from? Like you're in space for six of these. Fuck if you want to. Why is this such a big deal?

SPEAKER_03 33:15

It really shouldn't be. You're you're there.

unknown 33:19

What else?

SPEAKER_00 33:22

Well, yeah, we're supposed to be intelligent people. The script would suggest otherwise.

SPEAKER_01 33:28

But yeah, so big alien butthole number two, but this time it's a oh and uh I wanted to also say, do you know Iko Ues? I think that's how it's pronounced. I don't know if he's the captain, but he's the he's the guy who gets infected, it goes through his nose.

SPEAKER_00 33:52

Is that have we have I jumped scene? Um what? I'm lost with someone infected here.

SPEAKER_01 33:59

No, my bad. I I'm jumping to something entirely different for a second.

SPEAKER_00 34:04

Okay, but maybe a factual statement. I was like, what's what's going on here?

SPEAKER_03 34:12

He's in the raid.

SPEAKER_00 34:14

He's in the raid?

SPEAKER_03 34:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:17

Is he like a big guy in the raid, or is he like a sound guy in the raid?

SPEAKER_03 34:21

He's the main guy.

SPEAKER_00 34:23

Oh! Oh, I never noticed. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 34:27

That's what yeah, they give him a cool fight scene in this movie.

SPEAKER_00 34:32

Oh shit, that makes so much sense. Oh, but okay, rock scene, Chris. You love this scene. You can do none about it, I've been talking too much.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

Wait, remind me what you were talking about, because I got distracted talking about this actor earlier.

SPEAKER_00 34:48

Chris, we're talking about I'm the tired one here. How are you losing focus?

SPEAKER_04 34:53

I'm I just have ADHD, man.

SPEAKER_00 34:57

What about the rock? The scene that you like where Duane the Rock Johnson shows up and fucks someone in the face.

SPEAKER_01 35:05

Oh, yes. Well, all right. Fucking first of all, so funny, these scientists. He just picks up a rock from the side of this hole and goes, wonder how deep this is, and chucks a rock in this hole, he doesn't know what it is. And it blasts him and blows a hole in his face, like something out of the Patriot or Armageddon. But like what do you expect? Why are you throwing holes down alien why are you throwing rocks down alien holes?

SPEAKER_03 35:42

Just crazy.

SPEAKER_00 35:45

Yeah, it's it's such a strange reaction that they went, Oh, we found giant alien land masses on this planet. A, they start cheering, which is weird, like you're not worried about in this situation about what these giant air vents in the planet are, and B, why are you even chucking something into it? Again, Prometheus people go, Oh, why do why are the scientists and alien and Prometheus poking out these eggs? Why is he throwing rocks down the like reverse alien skyscraper? And then dangling his face over the edge of it when it starts blowing up.

SPEAKER_04 36:32

He deserved what he got.

SPEAKER_01 36:40

Have you ever seen Pandora?

SPEAKER_00 36:43

I have not seen Pandora, but it's on the list.

SPEAKER_01 36:45

I got Pandora vibes from the first 10 minutes or so of this movie. Not from the movie itself, I guess, and how it was fully presented, but just the someone wandering around a defunct spaceship trying to piece together a mystery.

SPEAKER_00 37:04

Is Pandora good? Is this a recommendation for Pandora? Pandora.

SPEAKER_03 37:09

Yeah. Yeah. Do you know Ben Foster?

SPEAKER_01 37:13

I do not. Oh, that's fine. It's a guy wakes up in like a stasis tube in a ship that is a spaceship that he doesn't see anyone on, and it's like, you know, wires are hanging down. It's a very dead space feeling movie.

SPEAKER_00 37:34

I feel this movie's a very dead space feeling movie. Even though Flamethrower looked at Alpha Cutter.

SPEAKER_01 37:42

This movie reminds me a little bit of Endorum.

SPEAKER_00 37:46

Which again, the flamethrower in the space station. Another alien. Like we're I feel like almost every scene in this movie, Flying Lotus, was like, yeah, like that sci-fi movie. Can we put that in here somehow?

SPEAKER_01 38:00

Okay, I'm glad you're saying that. Because now we can fully jump around. The flamethrower, I don't think, is an alien thing. I think it's a the thing reference. Because at the very end of this movie, the parasite turns into the thing.

SPEAKER_00 38:16

It is very the thing. The thing is very the thing.

SPEAKER_01 38:20

And she has to flamethrower it, which is the way you kill the thing in the thing.

SPEAKER_00 38:26

But it's more of the thing from the thing, and not the thing from the first the thing.

SPEAKER_01 38:34

It's very the thing from the thing, the remake of the thing.

SPEAKER_00 38:40

Yeah, but not the thing from the thing the thing.

SPEAKER_04 38:44

No, no, not the thing from the thing, the thing.

SPEAKER_00 38:48

But oh well, I mean. I suppose it's just a trope at this point. I can't even tell you what came out first, I feel like. The thing? Did the thing not because Alien? Yeah, and Ripley uses it.

SPEAKER_01 39:06

Between Alien and the thing, we're not doing a bit anymore. Alien came out first. Alien was 79, the thing was 84, I think.

SPEAKER_00 39:17

Okay, but Ripley's more famous for using the flamethrower and aliens. But I feel like Aliens, that was a fast production, wasn't it? That was like 81, 82.

SPEAKER_01 39:28

That's true, aliens might have been 82 or so.

SPEAKER_00 39:32

Oh so the thing definitely stole. Well, I don't know. I never read um oh what's the book? That's true. Would you read the the the book that the thing is based on? Not the thing. The thing. But the thing, the thing. The first thing.

SPEAKER_03 39:56

I've read that.

SPEAKER_04 39:57

It's good. It's good.

SPEAKER_00 39:59

Uh is that Did he use a phone cloud on the thing?

SPEAKER_01 40:03

Honestly, I don't remember. What I remember about the book is there's an actual spaceship that takes off in it, if I'm remembering right. I think on Sculphead Computes over a very long span of time, so I did not retain a lot of it.

SPEAKER_00 40:23

See, I the only thing.

SPEAKER_01 40:25

The thing was 82, Aliens was 86, so they stole it from the thing, if anything.

SPEAKER_00 40:32

Oh. That goes back to the thing. The only thing I can remember from the book about the thing is I remember there was a strange, like, elongated sentence describing uh McCree's abs. And I was like, that's that's a weird side note to have in this book. I don't remember It doesn't match the vibe of anything else going on.

SPEAKER_01 40:58

I'll definitely read it again before we do an episode on the thing. I love that movie.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

Are we doing a thing on the thing?

SPEAKER_03 41:06

We gotta do a thing on the thing.

SPEAKER_00 41:09

What would we if it's only two parts, would we then follow up by doing the thing the week after?

SPEAKER_04 41:17

We would have to do everything.

SPEAKER_00 41:20

Or would we do the thing first? Because it's a technically a prequel, and then do the thing after.

SPEAKER_01 41:27

No no no no no. We have to start with the thing from another world. And then do the thing, and then the thing.

SPEAKER_00 41:36

Okay. The thing. Oh, it's good. That was a Valentine's Day, we'll be doing the thing. Oh wait, would we be doing the thing the thing or we'd be doing the thing the thing?

SPEAKER_04 41:57

We'll do the thing.

SPEAKER_02 42:00

Okay. Okay, I got you.

SPEAKER_01 42:04

That means you should get a month at some point. Program your own whole month.

SPEAKER_02 42:10

What what Chris, what were we talking about?

SPEAKER_00 42:13

We've Oh, we were talking about the flame group.

SPEAKER_01 42:20

Oh well, we jumped around. We were talking about how it this movie emulates a lot of different sci-fi movies that Flying Lotus likes. So we jumped around about Alien, about the thing, all these different things that he wanted to put in this movie. There's a lot of Prometheus in the visuals, especially in uh like the outdoor stuff. When it's not doing the really trippy things.

SPEAKER_00 42:52

I can't you can't say the thing anymore. The thing the word thing is now banned. No more things.

SPEAKER_03 42:59

It's really funny.

SPEAKER_00 43:02

I feel like we say the thing too much. We always say the thing. Um but yeah, I feel like a lot of this is just it's it's weird because Flying Lawrence, he doesn't direct movies. So obviously anything that he tries to to steal from other sci-fi classics, he's not going to do better than like Ridley Scott or you know John Cameron. It's not happening. So I don't know why rather than trying to do your own thing with your uh base horror sci-fi movie, you would just imitate people that are definitely more equipped to do the job than you.

SPEAKER_01 43:54

It is. There are shots of this that feel like waters of Mars.

SPEAKER_00 44:00

I haven't seen Waters. What the fuck's Waters of Mars?

SPEAKER_01 44:03

It's a Doctor Who episode, Buddy. You've seen it.

SPEAKER_00 44:06

Oh Chris, it's three in the morning. Got me some Zack.

SPEAKER_01 44:15

Episodes. There's shots of this. I feel like I'm looking at a shot of the water monster. And those look good, but good for a TV show because of the budget. This It's doing so much, but it's not. I'll say the one thing that I thought really surprised me besides the guy's face getting blown off was um the thing monster at the end. There's some really bad CGI stuff with it, but when you see there's like practical face folds that are flopping off of it, those look really good, really creepy. Fake all face.

SPEAKER_00 44:55

Very similar to like. Oh true, right? Scarily similar. It's like we've all just reused the same face prop.

SPEAKER_04 45:14

Maybe.

SPEAKER_01 45:16

Although this one emulates Aaron Paul really well. Where's this face prop? You think someone has it?

SPEAKER_00 45:26

Oh I got surely Aaron Paul must have it. See if you're gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_01 45:30

Oh, that'd be so fun to bring out at a party.

SPEAKER_00 45:33

Oh what you do no, what you do is you wait until someone's coming over to your house, and then you put a bunch of fake blood on your face, and then you put your face on your face so you can run out with your face falling off.

SPEAKER_01 45:48

Yeah. You you don't do it immediately, you put some fake blood in it, and you put it in the kitchen, and then you have them sit down and you go, I'm gonna go I'm gonna go use a can opener, I'm gonna go open a can of beans. You run and put your fake face on and you run around screaming.

SPEAKER_00 46:10

See, I feel like beans a lot more devious. If I was gonna play it like calm, if I could hold it in place for a bit, I would just go, oh fucking really itchy today. Like I can't stop itching this part of my face.

SPEAKER_04 46:23

So disgusting.

SPEAKER_00 46:25

Just fucking ripping turf. But yeah, the the end was Do you want to talk about the monster? Because I feel like the monster what what's its plan? Because I feel like they describe its plan, but I don't get it.

SPEAKER_01 46:44

I assume from the start that I I didn't get what they were describing either. I well, he does talk. I wanna I'll talk about that in a second. I want to talk about that. But what I assumed from the start is that it wanted to get on the spaceship, because it's trying to convince her as Aaron Paul to get on the ship. But talking about fucking I have in all caps of my notes. Refer notes this time. Parasite monologue. Horrible. I thought this was a bad part of the movie. I liked this. It was actually the moment the movie lost me a little bit, which is weird. I was pretty on board with this movie up until then.

SPEAKER_00 47:31

Oh, that was like real close to the end as well.

SPEAKER_01 47:34

It is, it is. It it's not to say I didn't dislike anything in the movie, it's just that it kept me going well enough. And then this happened, and I went, I don't trust this movie anymore. I don't think it knows what it's doing.

SPEAKER_00 47:50

But okay, but it's plan.

SPEAKER_01 47:52

Okay, so it's how did let's just say they wants to take over. It says like you have come to take our world, we have earned this something or other. We just need to take one of you, and then maybe like we can add you to our conquest, something like that.

SPEAKER_00 48:14

Okay, so it's I assume it's from the planet they're on. Do they get it from the rock that hit their crewmate? Like, where did it come from? Oh wait, it was in the wires, wasn't it, somehow?

SPEAKER_01 48:32

Yeah, later in the movie, the show is just growing everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 48:36

Yeah, so I find it's strange that only one of them's alive. Because they're like, oh, it's like this biomechanical gloop that's like in our pipes and shit. Which would be horrifying.

SPEAKER_01 48:47

It's crazy to me that speaking about protocol being a reference to alien, it's crazy to me that the protocol is go back to the main ship after you've noticed an infection. I would think protocol is don't go anywhere, isolate everybody.

SPEAKER_00 49:07

That's a good point now you bring it up, is like why why would the first sign of there's an alien illness or fungus growing around us? We should take it back to what seemed to be the last remaining human columns.

SPEAKER_01 49:25

Yeah, they said the mission takes priority, but I assume the mission would also mean not infecting whatever one guy is still up on the ship.

SPEAKER_00 49:36

And also, this is the last planet we're on. So once we go over weird alien fungus that attacks people, surely like, okay, well, that's that's humanity fucked.

SPEAKER_04 49:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 49:49

Well, I guess in that case it doesn't matter. You can get up to the ship if humanity's fucked and there's no real but I don't know. Yeah, it just seemed like the wrong they didn't they they also don't express the gravity of that situation enough. It might as well just be a space mining vessel.

SPEAKER_00 50:10

Okay, but so if the aliens are biomechanical, like the little gloop people, does that mean that the structures are made of the aliens? Or do they have like their own cy structures going down? Like what's what's what's the tubes out then?

SPEAKER_03 50:31

That's a good question. I do not know.

SPEAKER_00 50:35

Like is is our little I don't even know what a little blob man what we'd call him. But like you see like phoning up a plumber to like fix his pipes when he's on. I suppose he has his pipes. He would just fix it himself.

SPEAKER_03 50:50

He is his pipes.

SPEAKER_00 50:52

He has his own pipes. That's where the biggest.

SPEAKER_01 50:59

Still gotta get someone else to fix them sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 51:03

Yeah, but he he fuses in with like earth material. So I'd be like, hypothetically, your bathroom is like your toilet is like a little flesh bowl with like little small intestines for pipes. And then any time your toilet ruptured, you would simply like plug your own ass into it and grow it back up. I feel like there'd have to I feel like if that was if that was human beings, yeah, someone else would have to do that job. I guess asking for an infection.

SPEAKER_03 51:37

Sounds like it is, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:40

Okay, well alien infrastructure aside he he like the alien like he's talking about like oh where like join us This is like like like it's a hive mind thing but it wants to go somewhere and I don't know where it w presumably back to humans, but it can only seemingly infect one human at a time. So I don't I don't know what its end goal is supposed to be. It's unclear And also why does why does the neck patchy stop it? I I don't understand what the neck patches are.

SPEAKER_01 52:25

I don't either. I I did not get that. I was hoping you would have coped what those are.

SPEAKER_00 52:31

And also why can she think when the rest of the crew say Okay, so we'll go our our first infected guy, right, is is our raid man. What a what an awesome fighting. Like the action's so well choreographed for him.

SPEAKER_01 52:48

Yeah, he must have choreographed it himself. He usually choreographs the movies he's in.

SPEAKER_00 52:53

Yeah, but it's not even that like the way it's filmed, like it's it's insane the jumping quality from the rest of the movie to like this one scene. This one scene. It is true.

SPEAKER_04 53:05

It's so cool.

SPEAKER_00 53:07

It's really violent as well. I wasn't expecting the level of violence we got in this. But he he turns into like a a zombie when he gets infected. And then his his friend who also gets infected is like a zombie for a bit. But then he he's able to stop it for a moment. But oh my Chris. Chris, see the fucking stupidest scene in this film. Her main character's talking to what I think is her her husband or boyfriend whilst he's infected. Yeah, and she goes, Okay, I'm going to to kill you. And he goes, Yeah, alright, do it. So she stabs him in the stomach, and then the alien just leaves him and climbs into her. What did she think was going to why did she stab him? What was the purpose?

SPEAKER_04 54:05

Yeah, it didn't. It wasn't. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 54:11

I was I was watching it and I was like, oh, she's going to try and dab in his ear because that's where it crawled in. And I was like, that's gonna but that's gonna look painful and that's gonna suck because she needs to look at him while she doesn't. And she stabs him in the fucking gut. She probably didn't know.

SPEAKER_01 54:29

The way I saw it was that he was holding her still because he was still infected, so that she couldn't move. But I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 54:39

He had his own mind for the moment.

SPEAKER_03 54:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 54:43

I feel like she just gutted her hobby for no reason. Maybe just a little maybe just a little bit. I like that we send um our blonde-haired woman just out to die in this alien planet. That was also very funny. We slap her in a spacesuit and go, off you go. Bye bye.

SPEAKER_01 55:07

Yeah, I like that they try blaming everything on her too.

SPEAKER_00 55:14

Even the woman will blame the women that shit goes wrong in space.

SPEAKER_04 55:19

And she was trying to help her too.

SPEAKER_00 55:24

Wasn't she already like dying as well when he didn't her out? She's not bleeding.

SPEAKER_03 55:30

Was she?

SPEAKER_00 55:33

Chris, you just watched this movie before me, man.

SPEAKER_03 55:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 55:38

I've also I've had a long day. I mean I've gone through a breakup today.

SPEAKER_00 55:44

So if uh yeah, Ash was probably not um the top of your mind, I suppose.

SPEAKER_01 55:51

Not through the whole movie, unfortunately, but I did still enjoy watching it.

SPEAKER_00 55:57

It was just when Azothoff started talking to our main character, you're like, no, I can't be dealing with this anymore.

SPEAKER_03 56:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 56:07

Or whenever Isaac Gonzalez was not on screen.

SPEAKER_00 56:11

Okay, so okay, this is this is a this is why we jump about because I remember the second stupidest thing that happened in this film. Our main character tries to convince Jesse Pinkman here after admitting that she thinks she killed the entire crew to stay with her two more hours because she wants she thinks she can take drugs and uh hallucinate her memories as to why she is now a serial killer. And she thinks that that is a persuasive argument to keep Jesse Pinkman in the small base next to her. How about no? How about absolutely not? And what you're never for anyone's day there. Like where'd you say okay, this is before you ever read that? Okay, so say you're watching an air-line base and you hear something goes wrong, so again, this is from her perspective. I'm not gonna happen to Aaron Paul, but this is what she thinks happened. You hear things have gone wrong, so you fly down into the base, okay? Everyone's been brutally murdered and one person is missing, and then you find the one other crew member that has a knife and attacks you and then says, Wait, I'm sure I killed everyone, but can you please stay here whilst I take drugs? You wouldn't probably not. And I wonder how dire of the rest of spaces. Yeah, maybe he trapped it, but I g that's it has to be possibly the the least convincing argument I've I've seen in a film.

SPEAKER_01 58:03

I don't have much to say about that. That's a very good point.

SPEAKER_00 58:09

You say you like the thing, you like the lights, you like the fight. Give me some other things, because my rating is going down as we're discussing this.

SPEAKER_01 58:20

I thought it was dumb of uh Jesse Pinkman when he started talking to her. Well, you know, in hindsight, it's a different context, but as a person, when someone says, When do you think I'll get my memory back? In this situation, I wouldn't say, I don't know. I would just say you definitely will, all of it within the next five years.

SPEAKER_00 58:50

I would just go, I would just go, I don't know, maybe in the next couple of days or something. We'll play it by also why the fuck is Emo? Why is he the the the like the doctor all of a sudden? He doesn't even know why you lost your memory. He just sent a little like robot to go poking about in your head.

SPEAKER_01 59:16

It was really cool when uh is it the blonde lady who's in the spacesuit that gets drowned?

SPEAKER_00 59:25

Oh yeah, what a fucking what a scene. Rad. I thought at first it was gonna be like I didn't realize right away it was in the bathroom, and I thought it was like a gas pipe, and I was like, is she just gonna blow this fucker up?

SPEAKER_01 59:42

Yeah. Yeah, uh, I didn't know what was going on, or if it was like a weird fluid she was injecting into it, but just drowning her is very cool. And then using that as fuel for the suspecting herself was good conceptually. I don't think it really worked or did much for the movie, but it was a good idea.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:10

I suppose that's a fun twist, kind of, on the thing. When it's like, okay, if everyone's dead and I can't tell where the infection is, is it me that's doing it, and I just don't know?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:25

I feel like it's the only thing I think it's a good idea. I think this movie has a lot of good concepts in it.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:31

Yeah, but the concepts are other movies concepts, well.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:35

Yeah, but that's a lot of things. That's a lot of movies.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:40

This movie reminds me of weirdly a lot of um of Iron Long. Because it's all it's also a one-location horror movie out the end of the universe, where you're dealing with a direct horror debut with incredibly heavy color lighting.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:03

Huh. I guess I see that I still gotta watch Iron Long.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:07

You do have to watch Iron Lon. Oh, but oh, maybe we swap on a baba for Iron Lon to like give us a nice palette cleanser on a good version of this type of movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:19

Okay, I'm down for that.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:21

But I have to say, Mark Plier out of out of our boy Jesse Pinkman there does have significantly better hair. Did you see his hair in this movie?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:32

Yeah, his hair is pretty cool in this movie.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:35

It's cool! The faux hold of like the little choded ponytail at the bottom of it.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:42

Oh good god, no. It's like Jesse's having a mental crisis.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:48

I wouldn't rock it, but I think in this movie it's pretty great. It's good character hair.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:55

Okay, so hairstylist Chris, what does this tell us about his character?

SPEAKER_01 1:02:02

Don't do this. I I don't know. That he's kind of vain. He puts a lot of effort into his hair, even though no one is around to see it. It's just six people that will ever see or judge his hair.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:18

Maybe he thought this was like his big day. Maybe he's like, oh, the planet's walking. I'm gonna get styled up for us to return home. And be like, see that.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:28

I forgot that she finds his body in the ducts and drags him out and everything. Oh analyzes it.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:39

See, that's the thing is the m I don't feel like the mystery's bad, because I feel like all of the the twists like they worked for me. Like it wasn't a twist that I was like, I saw that coming.

unknown 1:02:51

Jesse.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:52

She looks at Aaron Paul's body and it says blood force trauma. The audience could recognize it. I didn't. But uh Yeah, there's good stuff going through it, but it's not paced well. It's not edited well, I would say.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:12

But even even when she finds his body, did were you under any suspicion that oh he was dead this entire time?

SPEAKER_03 1:03:22

No.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:24

See, this it's again good moments. See when the thing goes 50 also, this didn't not say he was dead for 51 days. How long ago did this happen? Oh shit, I missed that.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:37

That's crazy. The only notion we have of the last cycle was uh from him. That's interesting.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:47

Did sure because I feel like he showed up just as shit hit the fan, did he not?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:52

Yeah, in reality, he showed up right after the first guy got hit in the face, and then right before anyone else died.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:02

So it must have happened about two months ago. Which would make sense if the powers ran out. But like even the I didn't I didn't pick up I got occasions killed people, but I didn't think she was infected at first until like we started to piece it together. But I okay so what did you hate so much about a little a little azephore from the Skyrim DLC talking to our character?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:33

Oh, it just was stupid. I don't know. All of it you could assume. And it wasn't talking to our character, it was talking to the fucking audience. It just it was bad. I didn't like it. If you have to have it happen, have Aaron Paul talking directly to the main character in a trance. Don't cut to a thing doing I don't even mind when it's talking to her and there's a voiceover and text under it and she's on the screen, but looking at an image of the thing staring you down with its one craggly eye while it's talking to you, horrible. Didn't like it. Icky.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:21

Were you not a big fan of join her existence? Fuck your existence, girl boss moment. Oh, it was so funny.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:32

It was stupid that she had the fuck your existence moment and then also had a fuck you later in the movie. I think one of those would have been fine, but having both is a little egregious.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:43

It also is her hallucination. So she's not talking to anyone.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:49

Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:50

In her head.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:51

This is just Underwater, which spoilers mild. Spoilers for the ending, there's a monologue, but I don't like the voiceovers in that movie. I feel like the voiceover is one of the only bad parts of Underwater, and the ending voiceover says, Let's light this shit up, which is not good. And I felt like is out of place in the movie. And that reminded this reminded me of that.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:23

I don't think voiceovers work in almost any movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:27

I feel like it's especially not horror movies, it doesn't fit.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:32

I think it works if you're building like a fantasy. Or like a storybook. I haven't seen Fallen, no. But I mean it works for Shrek. It works for it works for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. They're iconic. Um anything we get a Christmas carol movies it works for.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:58

I can't blanketly say. I'm sure there's horror movies.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:02

Would you consider a Christmas carol a horror movie? Because that typically starts with the Marty Mustaine.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:08

That's just because it has ghosts in it.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:12

No. What do you mean? Christmas carols like existential horror.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:18

Existential horror is a drama.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:22

He meets like the personification of the future, and he takes them to his own gravestone and goes, You died sad and alone, and everyone hated you. It's a supernatural drama.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:38

It's not a horror.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:53

Correct.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:55

Has his his friend really working. Get what next week?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:03

Let's do the Sunset Limited next week. A movie where a man talks to another man about God and death and suicide. For at two hours.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:14

See, you know, you know that's my jam, go. I like philosophy.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:17

It's uh Tommy Lee Jones and Samuel L. Jackson.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:22

Aww, you could have trust two better people to have a conversation. Well, come on.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:26

It's a really good movie. I don't think it fits. I I don't disagree with you. That's a good horror. I I'm a I'm being a little pedantic. I can come around on what you're saying.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:38

Okay, I'm gonna think of the only other one I can think of that comes to mind is the house that Jack built. But that's because again, Yeah, that's definitely a horror movie. But is it a horror movie?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:51

Because I I mostly consider it a horror movie because there's kids dying in it.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:57

Yeah, but kids die a lot in a lot of things. Does that necessarily make it a horror?

SPEAKER_01 1:09:02

I think most of them are horror movies that kids die like that in.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:08

But when do when how like at what point do you consider it's not even really a thriller, is it, the house that Jack built? It's more of a like a character-studdy drama.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:20

Yeah, it's the same. It's like an existential drama. Where I suppose at some point uh a manifestation shows him something. It's very similar to a Christmas carol.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:36

Oh, then we go through different points of his life. I wonder if that's a fruit line for a house at Jack built.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:42

Interesting.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:43

Oh. Oh, Chris, you might be even in the house at Jack built, it's like you did this for your misdeeds, and like, oh, that's so oh, I'm gonna need to rewatch that.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:56

Maybe you found a reading. But there's a moment about where our buddy gets infected through the nose by the parasite right before he says, back the fuck up, and then we watch. Let me see if I can pin the sequence of events. He says, Back the fuck up. You look at the parasite in the test tube, it cracks. You look at our main character, she looks concerned. You look at the test tube, it cracks more. It cracks more, it cracks more. Then it blows up, and he gets surprised, and it just doesn't. It was a really it really pinpointed the editing as a problem in this movie, and how there wasn't any building of suspense before the moment. It it needed to call the audience's attention to the thing cracking. They couldn't just put in a subtle cracking noise and have maybe the people who notice it wonder what's that noise, or just cut to it beforehand contextless and let people assume it might be bad that that's happening before he says, you know, back up. Uh but it's almost like they wanted to give the audience time to understand what was happening instead of surprising the audience with you know just a shorter time frame.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:33

Yeah, it's interesting you bring up the edit because there was I d like typically if editing's not great, I will pick up on it, but I won't pick up on why it's not great. And there's the scene specifically where they're sitting eating their bulbous macaroni cheese at the table. Not only is it cut in a strange way, so you can't tell where anyone is in relation to anyone talking on the table, which is problematic of his is. I realized that it seems between shots he's either changed the lens or what camera he's using or the focus level of it. But each like when when we've got our main character and she's speaking, the focus is on her in the background, it's completely blurred, so you can barely make out any details. And then it'll cut to someone else talking. And then they'll be slightly off-center, but the background is slightly less blurred, and then it'll cut to someone else, and they're in center again. But it's blurred to a different level, but the Ibertovers like, what the fuck is going on in this scene?

SPEAKER_01 1:12:46

I think it's trying to do music video stuff, but it just doesn't work for a movie, and it sort of destabilizes you in a weird way.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:55

I think I was watching, I was there was someone on Reddit going through I forget what film it was. Oh, it was Osgood Perkin, uh Osgood Perkins, and they were talking about how they don't think he's a good director because he doesn't understand that changing uh the setups of shots whilst you're cutting in between two different things during the same scene makes things feel disjointed and it doesn't work properly. And I feel like that just awoken that in my brain to notice during this movie, it seems like Flying Lotus has the exact same issues. And I feel like the amount that I enjoy an Osgood Perkins movie is the amount that I enjoy this. It's a bad plot, it looks pretty good and has some nice scenes, but it just doesn't work as a full movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:50

It doesn't, really.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:53

Uh yeah, I just wish they gave honestly the characters more room to breathe. That's the thing that's missing in this movie is characters you care about. People developed in ways that you can recognize and relate to before bad things happen. Because you just know they're all dead. There's no point getting to know them. The main character is doesn't know anything about herself. There's not anything to grasp onto while you're watching this movie.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:28

Oh fuck, it's interesting, but if you think about it, uh from a character perspective, there is no characters because our main character, she doesn't know herself. Everyone else is dead, and then Aaron Paul isn't there.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:44

Yeah, there's effectively no characters to get to know. Even through the end of the movie. Because you just don't get time to spend with them.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:56

Could could we not argue that that's an impressive cinematic feature? To have a uh single-location horror movie with six characters, but no.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:08

But no character. Yeah, that is pretty impressive.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:12

It's possibly the first the first movie put to screens that's had that weirdly specific of an issue.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:23

They should have shot her out of space instead of I hope they shot her instead of letting her in at the very end.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:30

Oh, when she gets back to maybe what's left of the man, because we don't we've not been in contact for two months.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:39

Because I would ask what happened, and she would either say the truth, in which case I would say, that's bad. Why are you not quarantined and shoot her? Or if she said nothing happened, let me in, I would say, that's that doesn't sound right, and then shoot the ship.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:02

Like I started them, but really made me defending.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:06

There's no way for her to talk herself out of this is a bad situation. If someone questions her.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:16

Yeah, but like the ending, okay, it's like she goes to eat and they play like this big fiat's cool happy music, and she's going out into space. But humanity's still doomed. Like she didn't win.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:32

So what's it's I I don't know. I guess the idea they were trying to get back to the thing so they could find another planet to go seed. But they don't give you any idea that that's even possible.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:48

No. Oh, Chris, what about the music? Okay, the guy that made this makes music. Well people people are typically I say generally positive about the music. In any of the good reviews I see, it's typically the music reference. Did the music catch you at all?

SPEAKER_01 1:17:08

Yeah, it's pretty trance. There's nothing that I would listen to again, but it helps the music and the visuals together made it very watchable.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:21

See, I like I feel like the music is uh like I would say great. I I really like the music, but I feel like now the scenes the music matches. And it it it stuck out me particular in the scene where she's fighting the woman in the astronaut suit and chains of drowning car, it's a fight scene. But the music has this piano loop going, the dead and dead in the dead and the dead and looping, and it's like that's chase music. That's not fight music.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:52

That's true.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:53

That's like a running pattern, and you're in two rooms fighting each other. It just doesn't make any sense. Uh I thought I was gonna like this. I saw this as like it was cosmic horror, and it's like that's easy to win me. I didn't even mind I didn't even mind a little eyeball talking. I like a little eyeball talking, I think he's kind of cute.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:19

I don't know why he's- I know that it's crazy that she lived through a CGI parasite being extracted from her skull.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:28

Yeah, and she had the little Japanese robot poking her in the zone twice.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:34

Yeah, that's she should be dead. She should have stayed dead. When she died for a second, I said that makes sense.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:42

But again, it's they were stealing the like the the eyeball scene from Dead Space 2, but just with a brain.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:49

Yeah, that's true. I was thinking of the alien or the Prometheus abortion scene to roll out of this.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:59

You know what? A movie it reminded me a whole lot of and I was like, surely we're not stealing from that. And then we got to the alien breakout scene, and I was like, We're stealing from that and it was life with Rebecca Ferguson, Ryan Reynolds, and Jay Gyllenho. Oh how so I didn't notice like the way the little alien like wraps around and climbs up into people's heads and she's poking at it in the jar and the way it breaks out, it's like this is this is eerie similar to Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:37

That is very life.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:39

But life looked cool because it was like a little skin flap and had a little name. I forget what his little name was, but it was cute.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:45

Calvin.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:47

Calvin. I like little Calvin. This didn't even get a name. It's like it's so simple to add personality to the alien if she just sat down and went, Well, it's name's Ronald, by the way.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:59

Everyone, if you like Ryan Reynolds, you'll love life. Go watch it.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:04

I would I don't think anyone loves life. I feel like there's again, there's great scenes in life, but I feel like life is too long. Life is long.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:19

It is exactly what you were saying about this movie, where it's uh a lot of things from other movies stitched together. It's done better in that movie. There's that movie also has good cinematography, worse m worse music, I'd say, better acting, maybe overall.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:40

But you care about the characters in life. And small. Yeah, there's good characters.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:46

Good actors inhabiting characters in that movie. There's no characters for anyone to be acting with in this movie, they're just reacting to things.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:57

Because you know what they do in life, the second something breaks out, they go, shit, quarantine it, shut down that part, and we'll try and move over here. And then when they hear that it can break out through the walls, they go, Oh shit. We're gonna find ways to try to track where it is so we can stay away from the thing.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:18

Yeah, they're always doing something. It's about firewalls.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:23

Yeah, it was just fucking some hacker nonsense. And then in that you get to see like Ryan Reynolds turn to like a thin suit. And that's fun. It's very fast. I don't I feel like we don't have too much else to go on with this.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:42

No.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:43

Uh, always gets his whole throat cut. That's pretty cool.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:51

It's good again, the little flappy alien is kind of like I feel like this isn't a bad like well, I feel it's a bad movie, but it's not like a bad viewing experience. There's definitely worse stuff out there.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:05

This is a good movie to watch with a couple of friends.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:09

Yeah, if you were like drunk, or again, if you were very, very, very high, I'd imagine that is great.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:18

Yeah, I I think this would kill it in that situation. Especially maybe a pizza.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:25

Soon she goes back to sleep, and then they wrap the enter the void flashing lights really fast to make you disorientated.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:34

Yeah. You could also just if you're watching this on your own, you could fall asleep for 20 minutes, wake up, and really not miss much.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:45

Do you I guess? I feel like it would be. Because you you wouldn't need to pay attention. Do you know where this movie would fuck? See those cunts that set up our home cinema setup to have those LED lights that change to what the colors on the screen are.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:06

Oh, that's true. That would this would be really good. You're gonna make 40x at home.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:12

Yeah, and then you've got the speakers. Like you have some good speakers with the with the soundtrack, because they're both fucking booms in this movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:21

That would be good. If it weren't so late, I do have a surround sound setup. I would have cranked that, but it's too late to do that. My floors and ceiling are too thin.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:31

I really need a surround sound setup, but I feel like most pirating uh sites don't give you I suppose it'd work with my Blu-rays. I'll have to set up a I have to set up a uh surround sound set. Also, I'm in a flat and I don't know where I put my speakers in my room, but wouldn't just vibrate my neighbours.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:53

That's the problem. That's what I'm dealing with, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:01

Because you'll just hear loud screams randomly vibrating in their in their ceiling.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:06

The audio is not balanced well in horror, and it's intentional and it's good in a lot of cases, but yeah, it's really tough to feel respectful about. You can buy little patches of carpet to put them on.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:21

I could, I could just set them up on like a little a little rug or something. It's a smart idea. But I suppose that that segues pretty well into who who would you recommend this movie to? And just be just someone that wants to test a good HDR TV.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:40

If you liked Mandy.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:43

If you like Mandy, if you like I suppose we mentioned every single cycle of the case.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:49

The color out of space.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:53

The thing, Alien.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:57

No, no, no, no. I I don't know. Life. Yeah, if you liked life, you'd probably like this. I don't know if you'd like this specifically only if you like the thing or alien. You might those are better movies than this, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:13

Um if you like the movies that are close enough to this.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:16

I think Mandy is better also, but it's very similar in that it's vibey, not a lot of plot, a lot of action and visuals.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:27

There's gotta be. You say Pandorum, are we talking similar Pandorum vibes?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:33

Definitely. Especially in like wandering around a derelict spaceship with wires poking out everywhere, sparks flying around, not the the mystery. Pandorum is about like what happened in this spaceship. I don't have my memory. That is all that is all very Pandorum.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:54

Do you know what C you like enter the void, not because you understand anything of what's going on in the movie, but because you like the visuals, then you'll probably you'll probably fuck with Great Fitch.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:10

Great fitch.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:12

That's the best way to describe it. If you watch Enter the Void and you went, I don't know what's going on, but I'm having a good time. This is the one for you.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:22

My copy is on the uh the fight with the thing monster. It looks really good when they let it be practical.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:30

Shit, I've got in my notes, he's a little goofy. I don't like his little his little willy whip. Why is it why is he just whipping it out?

SPEAKER_01 1:26:39

I don't like the tentacles either. Mostly the face is what I'm talking about. I think looks fantastic.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:50

The the whippy thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:55

It's 100% resident evil. I remember I was watching it and I was like, oh Chris said last week this is very Resident Evil. I wonder if he'll bring it up this week.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:06

It is, yeah, it still is. But this one's very Resident Evil 4. What's the virus that makes them do this shit?

SPEAKER_00 1:27:15

Oh, I was thinking the doctor from Resident Evil 2, what's his name? Um fuck, what's the doctor from RE2's name? One you slap with a crane.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:26

Is that Birkin? William Birkin?

SPEAKER_00 1:27:29

Yeah, doc uh yeah, Birken? Yeah, I think it's correct. He's very he's very Birkin. Is also Resident Evil 5 a little with the Uruboros virus?

SPEAKER_03 1:27:41

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:45

But I suppose that's this is this is what we call it, isn't it? We don't even know what we're doing next week. I haven't even put out the this month one. Uh it's my child next week, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 1:27:56

Uh yeah, if you want to call it right now.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:02

Fuck it, we'll go on Onibaba. I want to see Willem Defoe's favorite film.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:06

We're watching Onibaba next time.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:08

And I'm in a Japanese one differently.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:10

Hell yeah. So if you want, you can get in touch at the Uncannyvalley Podcast at gmail.com. Uh we're on Instagram at the UncannyvalleyPod. Have a good night. Thank you for listening.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:27

Bye bye.