30. Sophie, I called out your name

There are about 58,000 nannies working in the UK and about 75,000 au pairs. This dropping by quite a lot due to Brexit and a change in immigration laws. A nanny is seen as professional employee, whereas an au pair is a someone on a cultural exchange visit.

Generally, au pairs receive pocket money or a small allowance and works an average 30 hours a week and unlike a nanny is not required to have a formal qualification. They always live in , whereas nannies normally  live out. Au pairs are also expected to help with light housework. The phrase au pair  means ‘on equal terms’

The concept of the au pair started in the late 19th century, where women were brought into rich families to help the children learn a new language. Switzerland was the center of most of this activity. The role was formally recognized by the EU in 1971 for the purpose of cultural exchange. Many of the au pairs working in the UK are from France but this has ground to a halt in recent years. Post Brexit the role has no official visa status and no official legal immigration channel. Dedicated agencies have now stopped placing au pairs  and there are now visa barriers that require a min wage, which is higher than the pocket money that au pairs receive. About 20% of all married men in the UK admit to having had an affair at some point in their lives. Cheating is the most common reason for divorce with 33% of all divorces due to one or the other partner having had an affair, usually men. 44% of all unmarried women in the UK have engaged in infidelity. People have affairs due to emotional dissatisfaction, loss of intimacy, low self esteem, unresolved anger or a desire for revenge or its simply an ‘exit affair’. Often there has been a communication breakdown, people have grown part or taken each other for granted. Opportunity and circumstance play a big part as does major events or times of crisis.

This is song about a French au pai that previously worked for a yuppy English couple in   Chiswick, West London He has a good job in the city and they have two children. The beautiful au pai was called Sophie. This a song written like a whispering conversation between the husband and Sophie, ten years  after she returned to France. Albeit I used a female singer to keep it gentle and  feminine. I was really pleased with the result, which is a bit different  to most songs. The conversation starts with ‘Hi Sophie, I’m calling you for a reason. Do you remember, your time in London’  and then, ‘I called out your name in bed, on her birthday’. This has clearly rocked his marriage, so much so that his wife now wants to call Sophie and discuss events from ten years ago. 

It tuns out he wants to come clean, albeit after he shouted out Sophies name in bed. He sings, ‘I said, I don’t want any lies between us’ –now  that’s that very good of him !

He seems to be explaining to his wife and reminding Sophie how it innocently began 

i.e. ‘It started with a simple walk in the park. Putting on makeup, going out after dark. Sophie, I finally told her about the affair. About sleeping with our French au pair. You always made me laugh so much. Now asking me questions, about my crush’

Funny how he relegates the issue to ‘ a crush’’ and of course, like all cheaters, there is no mention at all about his children and the effect on them and their lives.

Our fallen hero now starts to feel sorry for himself ( that’s the norm ) and pleads to keep the marriage together , ‘I’m terrified she is now going to leave me.I’m being judged, turning two into three. I asked her to forgive me, to defuse the tension. To try and face the blows, to learn a lesson’. The songs ends abruptly ! – its all too little too late, I'm afraid.