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The Beauty Files Podcast
Case #031
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Episode 31 - Do's & Don'ts of hosting. Fresh off the girls' recent vendor event, they have a thought or two about this subject!
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Those swag bags that you have, they were a good size and they are very aesthetically pleasing. Welcome to the Beauty Files. We are fresh hot off of the big exquisite event. If you were there, thanks for coming.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, thank you.
SPEAKER_01If you weren't, uh I have to say you really missed a very nice event. First of all, the weather was impeccable. Yes. Could not have had better weather. And great vendors. It was a good variety.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Even though we both were just saying that we had no idea that like certain vendors were there. Apparently there was a chiropractor there. Yeah. I would have liked to have known that. Yeah. There was a woman who was doing, I guess she was a photographer, and she was doing like not there, but she was advertising boudoir photos that she does. Okay. And she had a really neat, um, what do you call that? Like, setup, if you will. She had those like Victoria's Secret Angel wings. Oh. That were like, and they were on a mannequin. And the mannequin had on like, you know, something like lingerie, boudoiry, whatever. And I was like, oh no, no, no, no. If that were my business, maybe not the boudoir outfit, but you need to put those wings on. Yeah. That is that is what's gonna attract people and come to you because you have the wings on. Yeah. And then Nikki, uh, when she was in my tent, she was like, I could see you wearing those. I was like, you know what? You're right. I think I need to do that to get color analysis clients to set those wings on. It was it was really funny.
SPEAKER_00You have to make sure the wings are the right color.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely. And they weren't, they were like a blush pink. They look really pretty on you, actually.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Just say them. But yeah, it was uh that was funny. But yeah, it was a good um, good event, good variety uh vendors. I was I was floored. The slushy truck. Did you do that? I did I did not. I'll tell you why I didn't. Um because one of the husbands that was assisting with with setting up, he had a I don't know what flavor it was, it was blue, but then his whole mouth was blue. Oh and I thought, hmm. Now Michelle made a good choice because she ordered a pina colada one. Oh and that was white or clear or whatever, lacking of color. And that's what I I wish I did.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and then I guess there was so was the there was just regular slushies too. And then there was Oh, the dirty sodas. Dirty soda or dirty sodas. Yes, yes. And then there was a wine place.
SPEAKER_01Yes, which was a winery I had never heard of, uh Lavender something. Um too hot for wine for me. I mean, I don't drink wine anyway, but I was working. Okay, I was working, work it, girl. Oh, let's talk about this because this is hilarious. The day before the event, I see you for a lash fill. Yes, and I'm laying there, and if you've gotten your lashes done, it you look like you're sleeping, your eyes are closed, and you know, we're chit-chatting and whatever, and you say, Hey, are you gonna have your saint stuff? And I was like, No, I wasn't planning on it. And you said, Oh, well, you should, because I've been telling people that that's what you're gonna do. So I have to thank you because you more s more than pressured, you you just made it happen that I needed to like do a thing that I wasn't necessarily prepared to do, but it's because I just wasn't gonna do it. And I got everything together. I went to Walgreens and got a new poster made and had it designed, and I got all my makeup together, and I was doing foundation matching. Right. And uh I have to say, it really it made my my um stand, tent, what have you, look like that much more like oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm legit, you guys. You are I literally had like 24 hours to um execute and somehow deliver on that, and I did. So I just have to thank you for giving me a push that I needed. Look at you. I know. I'm glad. I had to be outside. You don't like being outside. Well, I d but you put me in the shade. Yeah, and that was very kind of you. Um, but it was hilarious because I was like, well, there's my room, and I'm gonna not be in there. Somebody else is in there. No, it was fine. I uh it was good that I was out there. I think it gave me it actually like finally answered the question of do I want to be outside for events? And the answer is no. So that was good. I would do it again, same same way. Um if you were to do another event, I would still do it outside as long as I was in on that side. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it was hot.
SPEAKER_00Would you would you do other events outside? Or would you only do inside now?
SPEAKER_01Um, I would say it depends on the event and how long the event is. Three to seven, which was your event, was perfect. I would not do any more. And if it if I were to do any less time, it had to be like nearby. Like close, like within 15 minutes of driving for for it to be worth my while. But it has to be very popular. And I don't know what event is only two hours long. So I think four hours is probably like that sweet spot. Yeah. Um, but yeah, I guess it it would just depend on the popularity. If it was like an event that was well known, then I would do it. But like Grey Apple, which I talked about not doing, um, uh that that's too long. That's 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Both both days. I went there today and it was an absolute zoo. Um also a very nice event, but she's been doing it for gosh, how many years now? Um, maybe five? Five. Yeah. Five yeah, that sounds about right. Very nice event. Very glad I just went as a patron. So, you know. I feel good about my decisions as of late. So that that means something.
SPEAKER_00When you canceled it, did you get refunded or no?
SPEAKER_01No. No, I did not. Uh I didn't ask because I thought that would be I thought if if s if I were to get refunded, that's just a happy accident. But I did cancel within two weeks, and that's not I booked it back in January. So Yeah That's I would say shame on me. I wasn't expecting a refund though. Yeah. I didn't check to see if she cashed the check. Now that I think about it. You know what? More on that. I'll let you know. Cause maybe she just never cashed it. I doubt that, but I'll check. I did see some empty spaces. Oh, were there? Yes, and I saw one and I thought, oh, that must be where I was gonna be, which was a terrible spot. So if that's the case, then I'm glad I wasn't there. But then I saw like maybe another two. So I don't know. So I thought that was interesting. Um yeah, lots of dogs. Lots of dogs. Lots of dogs. Lots of dogs. Everybody, it was like a puppy show. Everybody was bringing their puppies, um which was cute. Speaking of that, not actually of of puppies, but like service dogs. Yeah. I think it was the Dover School District. They're like they had like a like a meeting about making miniature horses part of service animals for the school. Mm-hmm. I just thought that was ridiculous. Like, can you imagine? Like, hi, Joey, this is our new student, Joey. Here's him and his miniature horse.
SPEAKER_00I mean, I don't know how many horses they're gonna have.
SPEAKER_01Horses, of courses. I don't know. I just thought that was really silly. I'm gonna I'm gonna um petition that like giraffes can be service animals.
SPEAKER_00I think anything can be a service animal at this point in the world we live in. I'm just being honest. Like pet mice, pet rat mice? Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01I mean that's less um less distracting. Like, I don't know what the word would be. Destructive. I don't know.
SPEAKER_00I know how are you gonna take cat with you out in public?
SPEAKER_01Cats, first of all, you can't train cats. You cannot train cats. I don't care. Yeah, I don't care. I think it's ridiculous. I I know dogs made sense because dogs I think can sense seizures before they happen. I don't know what a miniature horse is called.
SPEAKER_00Horses are actually very intuitive. I've I've heard. Very smart. Um and they can like horses smell fear, like they know.
SPEAKER_01Imagine you're walking down the halls and you hear No, you know what I'm imagining?
SPEAKER_00I'm imagining them taking a crab.
SPEAKER_01Yes, and I guess is that part of the training? Like, can you train a horse? I I have no idea. This just floored me. I just saw this today and I was like, what are we doing? Like, what are we doing? Why why aren't dogs why aren't we stopping at dogs? Who was not satisfied other than an allergy? But then just get some allergy shots. I mean, you're already got something wrong with you, which is why you need a service animal to begin with. Just add that to the list. Yeah. I'm sorry if that was insensitive, but I don't care what it is. This is for entertainment purposes only. Get over yourself. Right. Um anyway, I don't know where I was going with that. Oh, they had a petting zoo at Gray Outpole. Um, I think there was a miniature horse in there. There was. Yeah, yeah. You know, that's what you didn't have. You didn't have a miniature petting zoo.
SPEAKER_00I didn't have farm animals there. Sorry. Yeah. Sorry about that.
SPEAKER_01Well, I thought today it would be fun to discuss, you know me, and my top tens or my ten questions or whatever. But I thought we would talk about just hosting in general. We've all we've all as as a collective have hosted something at some point in our lives. Right. And kind of like the rant we went on a few thousand episodes ago about party bags. We have swag bags now. Yeah. And you had what did you call them swag bags? What did you call your bags? It was like the first how many people needed to be in the 25. 25 people. So the first 25 people at the event got did you call them swag bags? I think so. I can't remember. I'm pretty sure. And I think that's where you had the golden ticket. Is that right? That was really cute. I saw someone open it while they were in my tent, and I got to see the golden tickets. That was really good idea. Um, so I will say, like, the swag bags is kind of like the party bag redone, right? Yeah. You get it in the beginning, usually. Um, there's like coupons and like little things on, yeah. Like little, I don't know, just little things. Yeah. Some things are branded, some are not. Um I personally I love a swag bag. Yeah. I have never gotten one, but I love the idea. I just think it's I think it's um expensive feeling. Yeah. And it just feels more curated and more because we like stuff. Yeah. Do you remember those um those boxes? Oh my gosh, what were they called? They were it was like an early-on subscription box. And it was like a quarterly, like a seasonal box. Oh, yeah. And when you opened it, yeah, what the heck was that called? When you opened it, it was all kinds of stuff. You could get like scarves and blankets and like makeup, and it was but it felt very elevated and curated, and it was fun. It was like this is for me. I that is gonna drive me. The not the fab box.
SPEAKER_00Fit fab fun fit oh shoot. And they still have them. Not there's a like now, they're just more geared towards one specific thing. So like that makes sense, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, but when it first came out, yeah, it was a big fit fab fun, fit fabric. But then I was like, wow, I have a lot of tiny little bottles, and I have no idea what which is why the death of subscriptions, because it's like okay, how many bottles of lotion do I really need? Yeah. I mean, I still like to get them though, but I had to had to cut myself off. But swag bags, I would say that's a plus.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we did our brands that we have in office as far as what we put in them, um, which was good, and then you had your raffle tickets. So if you did something that you could put it in. Oh, that's smart.
SPEAKER_01Um I think it was great. I was a big fan. And it looked very aesthetically pleasing. It matched your colors. Yeah. So if you're hosting an event, we're gonna give the swag bags a thumbs up. Okay.
SPEAKER_00Alright. Moving on. Alcohol. So I didn't drink any alcohol the whole time. Uh there was no way that I I didn't either. I didn't know there was alcohol.
SPEAKER_01Who had alcohol other than the winery? Was there any other vendors?
SPEAKER_00The slushy thing? The wine?
SPEAKER_01Oh, yes. It's good that I didn't know that. Yeah. So I know alcohol is one of those, like, it's very polarized. A lot of people are and even like even like wedding season, are you gonna have it or are you not? I'm always gonna be pro-alcohol. I'm I'm sorry. Um, I just it's up to the individual of controlling themselves. Like if that um you can limit it. I've seen like drink tickets, I've seen like all kinds of things you can try and control it, but depends on the venue, depends on the party. If it's an actual party, a lot of people rely on it to like as a social crutch. Love it or hate it, but a lot of people really do feel good and have a good time when they have something in their hand. One could argue, well, what is it's just the hand then? It's just that someone needs to hold something.
SPEAKER_00No. No, because I can hold water something.
SPEAKER_01I can hold water all day. Like it's not yeah. If could you imagine? If it was just the hand thing, there wouldn't be alcoholism. No, it wouldn't be any social issues whatsoever. So no, I it is the drink that's helping.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So I I mean, I think having alcohol at events is good, especially for the clients that are coming, the customers that are coming. Um if you're working it, you probably shouldn't be drinking it until the end. Um, but that's just at a work event, 100% thought. Yes. That crosses my mind. Um but I do think for customers having something like that there, um it's just fun. I'm not sure if it was this I think it was the fleshy alcohol drinks. I think she had run out of stuff and had to send somebody to get more. So I know that she I know that they did very well because I know that they ran out. That makes sense.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and even if it's not like an event, if you're just hosting a party, I think me personally attending many parties over the years and hosting and and what have you, uh I'm like, well, where's the alcohol? Oh, it's a dry event. Oh, oh, we gotta go.
SPEAKER_00Like not that it's look you know, I think it's not a weddings are worse than that. Dry weddings are worse than like I totally agree.
SPEAKER_01Lots of people go to a wedding to have a drink and feel good and let loose. And I understand, look, I get alcohol is expensive. I don't think that's the first thing you cut. If if you're planning a wedding and it's expensive and things are are the money's tight. What would be the first thing okay?
SPEAKER_00Let's I'm gonna ask you this because uh you I already it came to my head. What would be the first thing you would cut? Okay. Flowers. The same. Thank you. That would be my very first thing too. And the reason I thought about that is first of all, like, I have allergies at the wazoo. So like flowers. For me, it's they die. And that too, they're perishable. Can we get some like fake shit and call it a day if it's good fake shit?
SPEAKER_01I was just gonna say, I looked into that. I was gonna do silk flowers for my wedding, and I think at the time there was a pretty big pipe price difference. Like, silk was way more. But I do sometimes they are, it depends. But I do, my mom will remember this. I went to Michael's and I curated like my perfect bouquet, which you'll love this because it was all like muted, soft, right? And to this day, we still have that arrangement of flowers, but you know, it's like, huh, if I would have used that as my bouquet, which I I didn't, I didn't end up doing that, but like I still have them, they're still here.
SPEAKER_00They're still here.
SPEAKER_01Um, it was a fortune though. Michael's like their individual flowers are like lots.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I am just not I I like flowers, but I'm just like not, I'm not a flower person. I'm just not like I don't want flowers. I don't want flowers. If you're gonna send me something like can you send me food? Can you send me um coffee? Can you send me I like that? Can you send me a surprise to something? Like send me Let's normalize that. I think Let's go. Like the surprise would be like, for instance, tickets to something. Oh and it doesn't even have to be expensive tickets. Um, or you say, I need you to take off this day, I have a day planned for you. I would rather get something like that than flowers any day of the week. Okay, I like that because it means that you had to think about it.
unknownYes.
SPEAKER_01If you are a flower lover, yeah, and it's your absolute favorite flower, true, and someone knows that. That's a little different. That is different. A little different, just a little. My finger is up, everybody. It's a little different.
SPEAKER_00I I love like edible arrangements. I love edible arrangements, and I and and I love sending them to certain people, especially, and and again, don't get me wrong, like especially for somebody who has just been in the hospital, somebody who's just been sick, something like that, because a lot of times it's healthier. Like it's fruit. Yes, of course. You know what I mean? Like it's something healthy. They it's cute.
SPEAKER_01It is cute, it is very aesthetically pleasing.
SPEAKER_00You can eat it, so it's gonna help you heal. Okay. So it's good for you. So it's it is a fruit, so it's not junk. That's true.
SPEAKER_01Actually, that's a fair point.
SPEAKER_00There might be some chocolate on it, but it's still gonna be good for you.
SPEAKER_01It's true.
SPEAKER_00And it's about the same price, y'all.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, all right, all right. I okay. So, everyone, if you're listening, to wrap this up, if you have to send a bouquet of some sort, make it edible. Edible edible bouquets.com. I'm pretty sure. Not sponsored. Um, or unless it's edible edible flower. I forget. I think it's edible arrangements. Ah, there it is. Ediblearrangements.com forward slash beauty files. Not yet, not yet. But if you're listening, we would love a show sponsor. Then there was the gift giving portion of the Beauty Files podcast, and that somehow came off of alcohol. Okay, moving on. Okay, food. So this this is interesting. And I you've recently this is top of mind for you because you've had a few actually. You've had personal events, your daughter's birthday, you've had vendor events. So in terms of food, how do you decipher full meal versus heavy apps versus just snacks? And is it rude just not to feed people? So obviously this is gonna pertain to what the event is.
SPEAKER_00I do think it depends on what the event is. I also think it depends on the time of day that the event is. I think that that plays a huge role in it.
SPEAKER_01And if there's alcohol.
SPEAKER_00Right. If there's alcohol, you at least need need heavier. If there's alcohol. Um so I'll soak that up. What do we do? In May we had mimosas.
SPEAKER_01Yes, in May you had a mimosa bar. Don't file yourself short. It was really cute.
SPEAKER_00And then um I'm trying to think of what we did. So we did have like charcuterie charcuterie cups. Yes. That were really cute. They were. Um, we did veggie cups, we did fruit cups. And the reason we did that is because it's so much easier to just grab it and go. Yes, hold and go. Um, and then I also did, which I thought was funny, um I I did a Dunkin' Donuts like tower. Oh, I remember that. I did a donuts tower that I made.
SPEAKER_01That was very cute.
SPEAKER_00Um because why not?
SPEAKER_01And this is important because time of day. Right. This was normal business hours. This was like 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Yeah. It was definitely normal business hours. You had to you covered it all. You had to do breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And you did.
SPEAKER_00In the past, we've done like full charcuterie boards.
SPEAKER_01Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00Um, I've done sandwiches. Yep. Um You've done veggies. I've done veggies. Yeah. Breakfast stuff. Cookies. Cookies. Yeah. Um. Yeah, I mean, I think for my daughter's birthday, we did pizzas. I and I always get too much.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that was the that's one of actually there's like three food questions in a row. So what do you think is worse? Having too much food or running out of food?
SPEAKER_00I think running out of food would be more stressful than having too much of it. Because you can just give it to people here. Here, take these to go home. The only thing I think about when I say too much is like how much is too much? Because if you have like an overabundance, then it kind of like bites you in the ass because you spent so much money on it. True. And then you're trying to do it. You can't return it. Yeah, you can't return it at that point. Blue dominoes. I would like to refine. I got way too many pizzas for my daughter's birthday. Did you? And oh my gosh, we had so much pizza left over, full pizzas. Like so much. And the cake, too. So the cake was so good. It was really good. Amy's cakes. Yes. She was at Gray Apple. So she okay. She had told me that the size that I got was gonna root for 10 people. Right? And I'm like, okay, maybe like some really large 10 people.
SPEAKER_01Honestly, if you had 10 of me, I think we could have killed that cake. That was one of the best cakes I've ever had.
SPEAKER_00In fact, I picked out the filling for it.
SPEAKER_01It was everything. It was like please send that information to my husband whenever it's my birthday. I need that exact, that exact it was so delicious. What was the flavor of the case?
SPEAKER_00It was like strawberry mousse. Oh.
SPEAKER_01And it was vanilla. It was up there with my mom's. She always makes um strawberry shortcake.
SPEAKER_00So it wasn't short bread or whatever it's called, but the so they were they have the difference between just like a regular strawberry and then they had a strawberry mousse. The strawberry mousse is lighter. It's light, it's light and very flavorful. It was strawberry. I also tried the raspberry and the raspberry mousse. They were also very good. Doesn't hit as good as strawberry. The strawberry was and I knew that she loves strawberry, so that's why I kind of went in that route. And I do too. She would have been betrayed if you got raspberry. Um but and then we got the cupcakes too. It was fine because I did the cake first and didn't bring out the cupcakes. Smart. So I took the cupcakes to the babysitter.
SPEAKER_01Also smart.
SPEAKER_00And so all the kids at the babysitter got to celebrate with her. Oh, that's cute. And that's a good idea.
SPEAKER_01So what are your thoughts? I'm sure there's people screaming right now, of like, why don't you just freeze it? You can freeze pizza, you can freeze cake. I'm sorry. I'm a I'm the type of person that's like I'm over it.
SPEAKER_00If I put it if I put it in the freezer, y'all, the chances of me taking it out and thawing it. Maybe you need to.
SPEAKER_01Oh, oh, I thought you okay, see, I'm the opposite. I wouldn't even let it freeze. I would just keep taking it out and eating it and putting it back and taking it out and eating it and putting it on the floor.
SPEAKER_00Well, in that point, then it's gonna stay in my refrigerator. So if I put it in the freezer, um, the likelihood that I'm going to actually truly get it out, because I'll do this with chicken. Alright. I don't know if anybody else is like this. You go to the grocery store, it's a great deal. Yes. You look at the dates on it, and you're like, shit, I am not gonna get that much chicken before the the expiration date expires. Okay. So you package it up appropriately and you shove it in the freezer.
unknownI do.
SPEAKER_00Do you not take it out? Forget about it. And then I'm like, oh, I'm just gonna get chicken the next time I go.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay. I see what you're saying. Yes.
SPEAKER_00So I have chicken in there.
SPEAKER_01That's really funny.
SPEAKER_00And then it'll be like two years, and I'm like, yeah, I probably shouldn't eat that chicken. So I have stopped myself from doing that.
SPEAKER_01Fair. And I agree. I'm more like, I can't look at this food anymore. Please get out of my sight. I'm wasteful. I'm sorry, everybody. Um, okay, along the lines of food, this is I think the last thing that's related to food. What do you feel about dietary restrictions? Oh my god, the second you tell me I'm on a diet, I'm on the seafood. Well, alright, not so much literally I'm on a diet, but more like, well, I can't have a gluten, I can't have dairy.
SPEAKER_00If you specifically but if you specifically say I can't have it for this reason, then okay, that's fine. But is that something that you as the host should accommodate for?
SPEAKER_01Um I was gonna say, I think it's very dependent on the event. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00For a a If you're going to a restaurant, absolutely, you have to accommodate people. This is an event.
SPEAKER_01So if you're having like a dinner party with ten of your friends, yeah. You might want to consider your guests. I can consider who's ideology.
SPEAKER_00But having a large event as a company, as a business, as anything like that, like that's very very different. That is very different. Um, I'm not taking that sorry, I'm not taking you into consideration. Um just to just so you know, I am not here to feed you. It is not my job. I'm going to have we're just doing it to be nice. We are. We're doing it to provide you guys with some nice drinks or a snack while you wait, in case you are waiting. Um and just to say thank you for coming by, but it is not my job to check everybody and make sure that you you know I'm clear of nuts and gluten and dairy and because there would be nothing there.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00If I got rid of all of the things that if I got rid of all of the things that people are allergic to in this world today, there would be no food there. That's very true. So very true. I mean, that's that's it.
SPEAKER_01We're gonna leave it at that. Okay, this one's not so much about vendor hosting. This one's more like personal. So if you if you're hosting and you really do have the expectation or or whatever, of saying, please don't bring anything. Do you mean it? And should the person still bring something?
SPEAKER_00If I tell you not to bring something, don't bring something.
SPEAKER_01I feel the same way.
SPEAKER_00But how do you convey that? Because I feel like everybody would answer that way. If I want somebody to bring something, I'm going to say, here's a list of what I'm offering or providing for the dinner or for the event. Um and then I would say, can you please list what you are willing or would like to bring? Or I would also make a list of these are the things that we would like to have somebody bring. Yes. Please volunteer. But a gift for like hosting, I think is acceptable.
SPEAKER_01Right. If you bring a bottle of wine, that's our yes, that's our I think that's fine.
SPEAKER_00If even if you bring like a thing of cookies or a thing of chocolates or something simple like that.
SPEAKER_01Have you seen though the like okay, this is even this is even interesting. I've seen this played out both. I've seen people bring a beverage, a wine, what have you, with the expectation of opening it while the event is going on.
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_01I agree. But I've also seen it done correctly where they say, no, no, this is for you. Do not open this during the event. This is for you only.
SPEAKER_00If somebody wants you to open something during the event, that means they want to drink it. So you better bring an extra bottle for yourself. Totally agree. Unless it's BYOB. That's different. And if it's BYOB or whatever, or unless it's somebody like, oh my gosh, I love this. Thank you. Which, you know, and you bring it, you give it to them, and they're like, Do you want to share some with me? We can open it right now. You know, okay, that's fine if somebody chooses to do that.
SPEAKER_01But Okay, here's a here's another one. Okay. This is great. You're at an event and you bring a tray of pick a pick a dessert. A tray of brownies. Okay. Okay. That is you brought it. There's half left. Do you leave it or you take the half with you?
SPEAKER_00Um, I ask. Would you like me to take these or would you like to have them? Because um sometimes people are like, please take that. I have so much food.
SPEAKER_01You're right. Asking.
SPEAKER_00I think asking is an appropriate response.
SPEAKER_01And when in doubt, if for whatever reason you cannot get a hold of the host and you gotta go, I would leave it. You leave it. Thank you. You are a decent, normal human being. I would leave it. And everyone needs to know that that is the acceptable route. Whatever you bring, you should always assume that it's gonna stay there. Even when it comes down to alcohol. If you bring a thing and you open it, it's half done. Sorry, it has to stay. Say bye-bye. Yeah. It's staying and you need to go.
SPEAKER_00I don't think that I've ever just left a bottle unfinished.
SPEAKER_01No, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_00No. I'm like thinking about like bringing food and stuff.
SPEAKER_01I don't think that I've ever just I will if I'm like at my parents' house and I'm like, hey, I brought a thing and I'm taking it with me, just so you know. I mean, that's different, I think. Um but no, if you're if I'm at an event, I I'm leaving whatever I bring.
SPEAKER_00I what I will say is if it's on a nice tray or something, I might try to like put it on a tray. Yes. Like I might like so let's I'll do a transfer. Right. I might do a transfer so that I can bring my dish home, like that I actually brought it in. Yes. Um I think that is polite because that's annoying as someone who hosts dishes too.
SPEAKER_01Yes, that's annoying.
SPEAKER_00And I also think that that is annoying as well. Um, but yeah. Okay, moving on.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Oh, here's just an open-ended question. Is there, and this is like we can come back to this if you want to think about it, but is there a little hosting detail that instantly makes an event like more feel more elevated? So I'll go first, only because I came up with these questions, so I thought of it. Um I talked about this maybe on this podcast. I went to an event last year. Remember, we talked about it was like the little it was like things. You needed to bring things. Okay. Okay. It was as soon as they opened the door, they had this whole rack of just filled champagne like glasses. Uh-oh. And they instantly took one off and handed it to you. As soon as you walked in in their foyer, they handed you a glass of champagne.
SPEAKER_00That's cute. And it was like, it just really champagne, but that's cute.
SPEAKER_01Aesthetically was very pleased. Do you like champagne? No. As the bubbles, you and your if it was a mimosa. That's so funny. My mimosa, I like without orange juice. That's champion. Hello, mimosa, hold the orange juice, please. Um, but I just aesthetically, but also again, this is why you serve alcohol. Because I was nervous. I didn't know anyone. Right. And then as soon as they handed that to me, it was like, I can't, I got this. I also got my courage.
SPEAKER_00I also think that probably depends on the event. And fancy how you know what I mean. Like, I would say that that probably depends. Uh you know what? Let's say it's a baby shower.
SPEAKER_01It's sparkling cider. Like, I think it's still it's the it's the fact of like welcome, and they hand you that. But yes, you're right.
SPEAKER_00It depends on the event. I don't know that I've ever been to a baby shower where anybody hands me anything. Like, there's always a favor or something to take with you, or well, usually they'll hand you like here's the the quiz that we're gonna do later, here's all your games.
SPEAKER_01That's fair. But that's different. That to me is paperwork and that's stressful.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I I think having a drink when somebody walks in, depend uh you know, depending on the event. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I just felt like it was very nice.
SPEAKER_00Especially if an adult event, let's be clear.
SPEAKER_01Because I would be very upset if we went to a kid's birthday party and they instantly handed my child a soda. Yeah, that's the same thing.
SPEAKER_00You know what I mean? Like it I I I think it depends on on the event. Um, we were talking about minor details. Um I think that, you know, if you're going to an event that's very specific um and there's a few amount of people, um I love like tiny little details, like cards that have just like just tiny little things. Yes. It's those little details. It's those little details that you sit down and you're like, oh, this is really cute. Yes, because it you have to just take it all in. And there's things, and and I like this like um one, it was a bridal shower, it was a very intimate bridal shower, and it was like um a napkin, and it had our names embroidered on it.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's really sweet.
SPEAKER_00And it was actually very cute. And I was like, that's very cute. Okay. Oh, I like it. So again, you said tiny details. So for me, like I thought that that was a very I want a little that's what I want.
SPEAKER_01I want like a little doily.
SPEAKER_00Right, it was it was very cute. Oh um, tiny details. Oh that's something that I like yeah. I like that.
SPEAKER_01It was like a favor, if you will. Yes. Yeah, that's nice. Okay. This is more of okay, this is great. What are the biggest hosting don'ts? So I wrote these down because these are all very important to me.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_01Bad lighting.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_01Bad or no music. That's like murder to me. Like absolute. Yes. Um, I did write no alcohol. This is alcohol is very revealing. AA, but in a different way.
SPEAKER_00Can you help us over here? We need help, please send you.
SPEAKER_01Yes, our glasses are empty. Um bad like seating arrangements, especially ones that are like circular. Like you're in a room and all the chairs are in a circle. That's like that's no good. So if you're doing that, you need to like rethink that. Um, those are ones that I thought of that like came first top of mind. Like that to me is an absolute deal. Fair, yes, bad hosting. Yeah, yeah. Well the thing is is I don't I don't think everyone thinks music's important. And I really have music at the event inside on the computer. And there was music outside at your at your event, and that was that was the first thing I noticed, and I really appreciated that. Yeah. So in fact, one of the children, like little littles, went and turned up the dial, and it was really funny because I agreed with that child. I was like, that child knows what's up, and then someone came over and turned it down. I was like, nope, you should have left it where it was because it was like an event at that point. Anyway, it was really funny. But yes, music and type of music, very important. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I but I also think type of music is also dependent upon the event.
SPEAKER_01It is. So I'll give you an example. I my husband and I used to host, I say used like past tense, it's just because we haven't done it in a few years. But we used to host like every year this the banger of a Halloween party, right?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, you're doing that this year, right? Yeah, we were gonna.
SPEAKER_01And then um, and then I we just didn't. I know. We were gonna.
SPEAKER_00We really were.
SPEAKER_01We were like really thinking.
SPEAKER_00I would actually dress up. Don't tell me that. And you know I don't do that. I don't do that shit.
SPEAKER_01Oh well, you know what? We're only in mid-September. Like, it could be done, but the issue is like I have high standards. I don't I'd have to really make sure it could be. I'll help you.
SPEAKER_00You want me to help you? If it's not my event, I would be glad to help. That's the thing. Like, I can organize somebody else's event. I'll just I'll give back to you.
SPEAKER_01Because I don't like help, and you know that. Oh, I know. Um, regardless, I had the party was was so perfect and well thought out that I had for the first two to three hours, I had a I called it my Halloween social playlist. That meant that that was social hour. That's it was music that had a witchy vibe, and it was exclusively for drinking and talking and eating and catching up. Okay. And then it transitioned into dance, dance, yeah, and it was Halloween dance. And when I say I don't take requests, I mean that wholeheartedly. I can tell you she will not do well. I'll tell you why, because it messes up the playlist. I have it in a very specific particular order. The songs I have crossfade, there is not a moment of silence, it doesn't dip down, it just is on. And I will be on the dance floor for six hours straight. And I have been, it's the happiest times of my life. But if you come up to me and you say, Hey, can you put on I walk away from you? I'm like, that is No. That is so offensive as a host. In fact, that is a big don't as a guest of mine. Do not under any circumstances request a song. Do not because that implies that I don't know what I'm doing, and I know I know what I'm doing. I have had people ask me for my playlists after the party because it was so good. And guess what? I don't share it. I don't. I think there's one person on this planet that actually got my playlist, and it was because I was in a good mood, and they asked me at just the right time. That is how protective I am. No.
SPEAKER_00Oh boo. No.
SPEAKER_01I well, I'll tell you what, you haven't heard it. You haven't heard it.
SPEAKER_00No, I haven't. I just asked you for it and she told me no, so it's okay. I told you it was a time and a place.
SPEAKER_01It's a time.
SPEAKER_00It's not right now and it's not today.
SPEAKER_01Anyway, but I that honestly, very offensive. Do not ask me to play put on a song for you. Yeah. I will ask you to leave. I I won't ask you to leave, but I do think about it.
SPEAKER_00It's not a wedding. Like it's a good thing. Exactly.
SPEAKER_01It's not a wedding, and there's no DJ there. And it's it's no. Who do you think you are? That's what I want to say to them.
SPEAKER_00And you should.
SPEAKER_01I should. And it's usually honestly, I will, I will say it's usually.
SPEAKER_00You should have a drink or two and you'll, I mean, why not?
SPEAKER_01It's usually people who are guests of people that don't like know they don't know. They're not in the know. You know what I mean? I put them in the no. I go, I go, I'm sorry, I can't hear you. And I'm like fuck away. There was one person I had to very like not firmly, but I was like, I'm not taking requests. Like, I don't think you understand. And for you to interrupt my dancing on the dance floor because you want to hear some slow ash country song. No, no, no, no, no. No, this is extreme dance. Some people, man.
SPEAKER_00Some people.
SPEAKER_01It's Halloween.
SPEAKER_00Like, no. Anyway. Do you have any thoughts on don'ts? Um, I I mean, if it's something that's very structured, I would say don't think that you're able to change it. Don't come in and try to change somebody else's event. Um, don't try to interject and think that you know better. Um, you're a guest there, you were invited, unless they're coming to you and saying, oh my gosh, this is a flop. What do I do? Um, mind your own.
SPEAKER_01That's you know what, that's funny because that I sometimes I really did bite my tongue. As a as a guest, when I go to people's homes and there's no music, it really like I will get very uncomfortable. Sometimes, depending on who it is, I will be like, I think that Hey, do you have a playlist? Show me to put on. I'll I'll go there. But it's only if I know them well.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I typically like for a lot of the things that we've done, everybody's outside. So I don't really have anything on inside, and then typically there's music playing outside and I'm not in control of that. Yeah. Um, but if I do know that people will be coming in and out, I'll usually put something on the TV, like just a you know, just to house or something. Just something. Yes. Um, typically. Um, but I do think that That's a bit okay.
SPEAKER_01I just thought of one. What? Okay. If you're having a party, yeah, and it's outdoors, do not go inside. Yeah. Don't even ask to go inside unless it's a very specific, like, the bathroom is inside. But do not, do not go inside under any circumstances if the party is supposed to be outside.
SPEAKER_00W I've had that a lot in the past, and it drives me nuts, and I just kind of am like, okay, well. I mean, I understand the bathroom. Absolutely. Like, I don't have a problem with that. The other thing is that typically there's lots of kids there, and parents do not monitor their children. Monitor their children, so they're like in and out, and um that is one rule that I do have. When they get to a certain age, yeah, they should start abiding by their rules. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, unless they're young, young, young, which is completely different. Very different. If somebody has an infant, like and you want to go inside with your own. It's different.
SPEAKER_01Again, discernment people, okay? But if that's not you, stay outside. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Also, my My house is no longer child proof. So then again I feel like I have to watch just in case, um, because I don't want an injury to happen and you know, so therefore I feel like that kinda takes away from the party. Um but I'm always on edge at my house. Hosting is very expensive. Hosting is stressful. It is. Um there's always so many things to worry about. You're worried about how everybody is doing, um if people are having fun, if they're liking it, if they're liking the food, like if everybody's, you know, safe.
SPEAKER_01Driving and just the party's flowing. Yeah. Yeah. That's a lot of there's a lot. You don't think about it. I guess if you don't care about it, it doesn't matter.
SPEAKER_00I think that I think there are some people out that are out there that are they care, but then when it finally comes down to okay, the party's here, let it be They want to they want to enjoy themselves. They want to enjoy themselves. And honestly, I wish I could be that person.
SPEAKER_01I'll tell you what, we had two parties two years apart here. The first year I was extremely hypersensitive and aware, and I couldn't enjoy myself. Yeah. The second time around, I corrected the issue. I hired a caterer and I had two bartenders. And I I have to be honest, that did it for me. I I was so relaxed, and I just took everything off my plate, and I was like, you know what? This is an amazing party, and if you don't enjoy it, then that's that's totally on you. And I just danced the night away. But I mean that comes at a price, not everybody. And that's probably why I haven't done a Halloween party since because that's a it's a huge financial uh and now knowing that that's what makes me relax, I'm like, oh crap.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I mean, I like I said, I think events are more fun to go to than they are to like weddings, same thing. It's fun to go to one. It's fun to go to a wedding.
SPEAKER_01Um, I don't ever want to have one. I understand that. I always joke about my own wedding saying I wish I was a aghast at my wedding. Right. I think I would have enjoyed it way more. Way more. Yeah. So what are you gonna do? Yeah. Um okay, I thought we covered that. Uh oh, this is a good one. How long should a party last?
SPEAKER_00A party, an event, uh any I you know, I think it depends on what it is.
SPEAKER_01Uh always. I think that's the number one answer to all these questions is it depends. It depends on what it's like. So let's break it down. Let's break it down. So you're okay, let's start at the top. You had your vendor event yesterday. You had it for four hours, and I feel like that was perfect.
SPEAKER_00I think I think when you have a vendor event like that, um especially if it's not like hu you know, huge or whatever, I think a few hours is is sufficient. I don't think any more than five hours for events like that um is appropriate. I think that you know how many vendors you had? Twenty-six. Really? Yeah. That's a lot. Yeah. So I think that um, you know, five hours, and I've talked to other people that go to events, and they would they would agree that like long day events, like they're a lot. Um, like Grey Apple, it it's a lot. I know people that go there and they do well while they're there. Yes, but it's it's exhausting. It's a lot.
SPEAKER_01But the amount of volume that they have, their hours I think are eight to five, Saturday and Sunday. I think that's appropriate. Right. I wish these little shops had like shifts for their people. That's a long day.
SPEAKER_00I also think about it in the terms of they're probably not doing these events every single weekend. Right. They're probably not doing things like this except for maybe a few times a year. Um, but I think that if it's like special occasion events and it's gonna be longer hours, that's fine. Um, for ours, it was, you know, more of like a pop-up random, you know. I think four hours was perfect. So from what I've heard from people that I have talked to and that do events, I think five is like the max for the majority of them. I think that um it truly depends on the type of event where it is.
SPEAKER_01And this bleeds into personal, like non-business events. So like our Halloween parties usually went from like seven to twelve, almost like a reception. Same, same thing. But then we had our outliers, they were there to party, and they'd stay until two or three in the morning. Like And you didn't kick them out, so yeah, I would have been like, dude, get it. Um there is there is a a time. You do hit a wall and you're like, okay, it's time. I think that's the hardest is actually kicking people out and and you feel like you're the bad guy. You need to read the room as the but sometimes that's where people are like, well, I don't have alcohol for that reason.
SPEAKER_00But I think that also when you go to somebody's event, if they have an end time, I feel like it's a good one. Yes, you need to respect that. I think if there's no end time, okay, well, that's on them. If they got mad that nobody left. Okay. Well, if you just said starts seven and you didn't say anything after that, okay, then that implies that it goes till whenever. Yes. Um, if you say it's from seven to midnight, then midnight is the end time.
SPEAKER_01I agree. Same thing like a wedding. Like that is the expectation. And usually it's because hey, I only have this space until blank even, so get out. Like And usually weddings are like seven or four.
SPEAKER_00They usually like four, three, four.
SPEAKER_01And they never go till midnight, it's usually until like eleven.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And then you have to be out. So um, yeah. I do think that um time frames matter. They do.
SPEAKER_01And this kind of goes into what we talked about, I don't even know, a couple episodes ago. But it was like, do you offer to help clean up? If the party is actually visibly ongoing, no. No. Just go. If you're gonna be one of those people that are gonna linger to the end, then yeah, you should pitch in. Yeah. I even though I will tell you, please don't help me, but that's another story. Uh last question here. What actually makes someone a great host? Is it the food, the atmosphere, the planning? Is it just simply making people feel comfortable? Like what is it that makes a good host?
SPEAKER_00I think if something is you get there and it is set up and prepared the way that it should be, um for that event, whatever it may be. Again, depends on the event. It really depends on the event, so that's why I can't be specific. We're just saying generic. Um Okay, yeah, as because only because this is top of mind.
SPEAKER_01As you were the host yesterday, you I think uh exquisite uh it's as an entity was a great host because me as the participant of being a vendor, you helped me set up, you helped me take down, you encouraged other people to visit my space. It was very um attentive. Yeah and that's the word tent in there for a pun. Um, it was I felt very supported, and I could not want anything more as a vendor. I did not feel like lost or like I was drowning or like, oh my god, what do I do? You provided power for me. Like there was a lot that I'm sure lots of people have gone to events and they're like, oh no, it was a shit show when we got there. We just had to figure it out. I've heard that. I haven't experienced that, but I've heard that. Um so I would say, in terms of what you did, that was great. And then it was up to me to then host anyone that came into my tent, right? And that's we've all been to the shows or you know, these little vendor pop-ups where you've got jewelry and you got a girl to sit in a chair on her phone, right? And she's like, Hi, yeah, you like that? That's great. If you get that, let me if you have any questions, like no no no no no. I need you to be like front and center of like, oh my gosh, welcome to my tent. I am so happy to have you. You look like you're a gold girl. Let me show you what like that. Is that's like it's like showmanship, like you need to have that anyway. That's hard to say about that. But if you're but if you're clearly I'm very passionate about this, yeah.
SPEAKER_00I um I will say, like, I cannot take credit for that. That was definitely I said exquisite, but just take it.
SPEAKER_01It's I'll take it. Take it.
SPEAKER_00But do yes, I think that that is definitely something that that helps out because especially if it's your first time or you've never had a setup before.
SPEAKER_01And you had some people there that was their first time. That was their first event, and they were giddy and excited, and it was special. Yeah, it really was. It was special.
SPEAKER_00I I will say I really did not get a chance to go around to all the events because I was it was chaos inside. Stuck at the front desk.
SPEAKER_01Um I'm trying to think what else makes a good host. Obviously, like when someone notices your drink is empty, handing you something else. Oh, that gets dangerous though. Because if it's alcohol, I would actually say, please do not keep refilling my drink. I do not want to top off. I do not want if I'm driving. That's you gotta look out for that. You can be too hospitable unless you're offering your house to me to stay there because I'm gonna be too drunk to drive home. That's a different story.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, which that's another thing. You don't want people to be that intoxicated that you're like responsible for them.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Unless unless you're prepared. Yeah, if you have accommodations, that's that's on you. Right. But yeah, don't dig your own grave and the c and the fact of like, oh, I've ever served these people, now what? Right. That's a problem. Don't do that. Um, but yeah, I don't know. I think hosting is it's hard. Yeah. It's hard, and it has some some finesse to it, and again, it just depends on what you're doing. I have a friend who can host one of those parties where she's cooking the entire time, and it's amazing. Like you're just sitting there, you're watching her cook, and and it's like it's just part of it. I could never ever ever ever do that. I forget what I'm doing. I forget how to breathe if somebody's watching me do something. If I have to cook in front of people, I will like drop everything and I can't let you look at me. Makes me very uncomfortable. I would never host a dinner party. Let's put it that way. No. The day that I invite you for a dinner party, I have been taken over by aliens. Like someone's wearing me as a suit. I mean like that's a red flag.
SPEAKER_00Not unless somebody else is cooking it for you. I could still have a dinner.
SPEAKER_01Even then, that still stresses me out. I don't like, but that's because that's like back to like forced conversation in a circle. I don't like that. But like taking out to a restaurant? I don't know. You tell me. I don't get it. I don't know. And on that note, we'll end there. I mean do you guys like to host? Let us know in the comments. Let us know. Uh do you like to be hosted? Sort of thing. Do you like events? Yeah, do you like events? Were you at the event? Tell us that too.
SPEAKER_00We'd love to know.
SPEAKER_01Don't forget what are your thoughts. What are your thoughts? And don't forget to share this with a friend or a foe, uh, a stranger or a close relative. Anyone. Anyone, literally anyone, because this one pertains to everyone. It does. Especially everyone, because we've all either gone or had an event. Yes, everybody has, yeah. And this is relevant to your next event. And the holidays are coming up, and it's gonna be go time. Yeah. But until then, this has been the Beauty Files. Case closed.