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The Beauty Files Podcast
Case #034 PART ONE
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The girls had so much to say, it needed to be split in to 2 parts. This is their most unhinged and entertaining episode yet- enjoy this one!
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You're gonna light your hair on fire. That would be not very good. Open the show.
unknownOpen the show. It'll be fun.
SPEAKER_02Open. And you just walked away. So I'm just here chilling by the candlelight that her husband decided he was going to uh light for us. It is.
unknownOkay. Did you open the show?
SPEAKER_02Um, I just said hi everyone.
SPEAKER_01Did you welcome them to the beauty files?
SPEAKER_02I was gonna get there. I was talking about the candlelight. Oh, yeah. That we're just, you know, you almost lit your hair on fire with.
SPEAKER_01It was close. Let me up.
SPEAKER_02Yes. Welcome, welcome to the beauty files. We are here. It's Friday night. It's Friday night. We're about ready to light y'all up, not she.
SPEAKER_01I like that. We got good good energy tonight. Very good. Um oh my goodness. Yeah, and we we came down to our this is not a studio, but I'll say a pla the place where we record. Yes. And um, yeah, there's two single candle lovers just lit. Lit and the wax is dripping. Philly Ganita. It says we're we're podcasting by candlelight.
SPEAKER_02That's what I said. Well, did you say I said it's we're we're sitting here by candlelight?
SPEAKER_01We are. So the sudden like the the vibe has changed. It's more romantic, lovely. Guys, it's October. This is it's it's hot out, but it's October. It is, it was a little I think it was technically seasonably warm because I feel like there's always that like what do they call that? The Indian summer.
SPEAKER_02Are they we allowed to say that anymore? Are we allowed to say anything anymore?
SPEAKER_01That's I mean You made me uh okay. I'm just gonna say it because it's we're two minutes into the show. Yeah, um we you know, my husband brought up a very good point. Very valid. Very valid. So you you had a nail appointment today, and you said you were quoting your nail tech, and there was a little little bit of an accent, right? And I always use an accent when I quote my nail lady because that's how she sounds. Yeah. And one could say that that's offensive, right? They could. They could. But where do you draw the line if you're quoting how a British person sounds or an Australian person, or like why where does it get skewed? Because also not to mention, I'm sorry, but those people are also super racist. So, like it's not a one-way street. No. Like, there's lots of non-white people who have lots of opinions about other races. So don't let me forget that. What is that?
SPEAKER_02My earring. Oh, did you take it out? Yeah. Are you allowed? No, I didn't take that one out. I took the bottom one out. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01Everyone remind Rachel not to forget her earring. Um, anyway, it was comical. So that just that's where my mind went when we said, Are we allowed to say that? Um, we have the glasses are back, everyone. We are we have beverages.
SPEAKER_02We do.
SPEAKER_01I know that was missing from the last show. Last show was a little low energy. Sorry, everyone. It was a week. Yeah. And once again it was a week, but it was a good week. It was I guess now I it was we're gonna go with good. We're just gonna go with good because I forget everything that happened up until now.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I like I said, um, we were talking about this earlier. I just wish sometimes I could just have one brain cell. There's been a lot of them around me lately. And I mean people. And sometimes I just wish, like, wow, if only I could be like that.
SPEAKER_01Um the just for one day.
SPEAKER_02It is uh I I do want to. Because I think it would have to really function, and the things that would come out of my mouth, even though they made no sense to anybody else, wouldn't matter because I had one brain cell.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And I thought that that was okay.
SPEAKER_01The I used to think I st well, I still think it's a superpower to be self-aware, right? And there's it's a big curse because it's I'm just always in my head and and and in other people's heads of like, what are they doing? I had a very long conversation with a friend earlier this week, and it felt really good to get it off on both of our chests. We had to just rip on all the drivers out there, especially this week.
SPEAKER_02Like man, on my way to work, I had a guy just like laying on his horn, and I I was waiting for him to get out of the car. Like I was literally. Are you or someone else? No, at me because what did you do? I did I didn't turn fast enough. Wait, this is traffic court. That's just traffic court.
SPEAKER_01Um dun dun dun dun dunly turn one way, right?
SPEAKER_02Okay, only go right. That was the only way I could go. Okay. But there's traffic across from me. Yes, oncoming traffic. Oncoming, right? She was there before I was. Oh, okay. She was there before I was. And then you got traffic going in either, you know, in front of you or like you can't go. So there was a point where she could have gone.
unknownYes.
SPEAKER_01So the right thing to do would have been to let her go is to let her go.
SPEAKER_02Well, I did let her go, but she didn't go. Oh, see, that's her fault. So she didn't go, and you got this guy just laying on his horn, and I got people coming. He can't see the people on this side that are coming like this way.
SPEAKER_01He just sees that there's an opportunity that you can go.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and he wanted me to go, and I was just like, no, douchebag. Today ain't the day. He thought today was the day. He thought today was the day, and I just didn't go. And then he wanted me to go again, and I didn't go again. Is that because that lady didn't go or because she finally did go? No, she still hadn't gone. Oh, come on, lady. But she so again, we're opposites. Right, right. And you have traffic going this way and this way, right? Um, so she had to she had to look for traffic this way and this way. Okay. And then me. So she's looking way more than I am.
SPEAKER_01I don't need to know where this is, but this sounds like an area that I would not like to be.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And so I really wanted to go straight across, but you're not supposed to go straight across. So I was kind of hoping to kind of go straight across. It doesn't sound like were you able to? No. I had to go like and I had to turn around before I even got to that point because traffic was so bad somewhere else. So I was highly annoyed at this point, and then you got this guy just laying on his horn and laying on his horn. And I was real irritated until he was rear-ended. He was I wish. No, I don't wish. That's horrible. Um, until I got one, two, three, four lights away.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And I pull up, and you got this probably 55-year-old, bald, big old white guy jamming out to Beyonce in his CRV. And I was like, Was this the beepy guy? He's just the guy beeping, or is this a different guy? Just someone that made your day. Somebody else. I mean jamming for him.
SPEAKER_01Jamming out.
SPEAKER_00Wow.
SPEAKER_01To somebody else. What was his sexual orientation, if you had to guess? Because that age is difficult. Like, oh no, he was straight.
SPEAKER_00Oh wow.
SPEAKER_01So he really can only be himself in the car. What song do you know?
SPEAKER_02I don't know many Beyoncé calls. Oh gosh. Well, and and I knew it because it was one of the old ones. It was an older one. Like old Beyonce or Destiny's Child Level. No, not Destiny's Child Level, but like older Beyoncé. And I was just like, see, I you would have asked me that like two hours ago, I would have known. That's right now, like it'll come to you have to be a little bit more. That one brain cell thing, maybe.
SPEAKER_01No, you want that, you don't have that. So um you just can't recall at the moment, and it will come to you. It'll come to me. Oh, but I thought that was a sight. That sounds nice. The and it's interesting, the the guy who is singing like that might also be a one-brain cell guy. And the guy who's blaring on the horn is probably like us, maybe even a little too turned on, or he also has one brain cell and can't see the scene in front of him, and he's just like car no go, car no go, must honk on horn. There's that.
SPEAKER_02I think he was that. I think he was a Neanderthal that was just like, yeah. What if he was really cute?
SPEAKER_01What would you have done? I would have still been like, you're a douche. I know. Well, see, that is the definition for good-looking people who behave that way. Yeah. Is a douche.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. I would have literally looked at him and been like, you are a douche. You win the prize today. Have a nice day. And then I want to drive away.
SPEAKER_01The things we wish we could say.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, well, holy cow. Yeah. Okay. Well, that that was a day. Um, you noticed a certain um accessory on me today, uh, which we'll get into right now. Uh I broke the tip of my finger this week, and I have a lovely splint, and it's it well, under candlelight, and I don't think you'll really be able to tell, but it's like it's all bruised and mangled, and it's so it's not really even a good story. Um I got it like stuck in a drawer handle. It honestly, it's it's too long to even explain, but just know that it was an antique piece of furniture in the drawer or dumbbells, so it's already like a very heavy drawer. And there was something set on top of this piece of furniture, and as I was like yanking the drawer open, which got stuck, I thought said thing was going to fall on me. So my initial response was just get out of the way. Right. Well, my hand was still in this metal drawer handle. And I'll be honest, I don't actually know how the tip broke. I thought I just But your nail's fine. Well, exactly. I thought I ripped my nail off because that's how it felt. That's how it felt and what should have happened. Yeah. Like that makes sense to me. So I must have crushed like the pressure of the handle must have just crushed my anyway. I still worked out. It was right before workout, and it was upper body day, so I had to hold dumbbells while flicking off you know you know the things we do. It's commitment, man. Yeah. I'm really proud of my skin. Good for you. But it did blow up to like the size of my face. It was purple. About four hours later, I'm like, I think I'm gonna go to urgent care. Do you want to get this looked at? Well, I knew well, I didn't know it was broken. I I am it was behaving like it was broken, but I was in denial. And then um, you know, what what do they do for broken bangers? Nothing. She was like, it'll heal in four to six weeks. Great. That's that's great. It's not inconvenient at all. Yeah. It is really painful. Um I accidentally like like tried to grab something and and didn't have my oh my splint on. You guys hear that? That was painful. Um that was an ouch moment. Yeah. I I actually physically yelled like a swear word in the house today. Like, like one of those. Like yeah. Yeah, it was really and you know what's funny? Guess what I was doing? I was doing dishes. Oh. And I just my hand like slipped, and I anyway. All that to say, um, it's really stupid. It was like a a a fleeting thing of just in my day, and now it's ruined my life for four to six weeks. I have two color analysis appointments tomorrow, and I'm I'll be honest, I'm not sure. Not sure how I'm gonna do it. I I've the anxiety of that is gone. I'm like, you know what? It is what it is. It's fine. It's gonna be fine. It's not my right hand. Yeah. I write with my right hand, it's my left, it's not my thumb, because I think that'd be way worse. Right. We're gone with that. And the splint is in my color season. It's silver, yeah.
SPEAKER_02And blue.
SPEAKER_01So I'm on brand.
SPEAKER_02You are very much on brand. Yeah. But so I also have to ask, yeah. I gave you something to try.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay. Well, that's what's that's what's so funny. Oh, that's on my notes to talk about. Oh. Um, okay, so yes, you gave me the Dyson, just the regular blow dryer, not the air wrap, right? I told you, I'm like super excited, which I still am. And then I broke my finger and I didn't wash my I I had to go get my hair. That's what I think. I can't like get I mean I yeah, it's too risky. I would mess it up somehow. Anyway, I'm like distraught. I couldn't even do the thing that I wanted to do.
SPEAKER_02Then you went into it.
SPEAKER_01So it's just mocking me. It's in my bathroom and it's like, hi, ready when you are.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And it's a cute little case. It's really a cute cases.
SPEAKER_01Well, the okay, if anyone's familiar with Dyson products, at least the hair care, um, yeah, they have like I only had the Dyson Air wrap, which comes with way more accessories. It it comes in a really like a big ass case, like it's huge. So when you came with just the the blow dryer, it's so petite.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it's so cute. And I'm like, oh I love it even more. So I um to be to be determined.
SPEAKER_01Yes. We'll get to that one day. It's either that or yeah, my husband blow dries my hair or washes my hair for me, I guess.
SPEAKER_02I mean that can be interesting.
SPEAKER_01Yes, it would be a really odd form of foreplay. I mean, although like head play is very relaxing. It is, it's like very relaxing. Have you seen those spas where you can go and literally just see and I play with your scalp? So I exquisite med spa's gonna do that.
SPEAKER_02We're not gonna do that. So I we used I like when I was in school, you had to do like scalp treatments and stuff like that and go through and then do the massaging and all that. Which is fine. I don't mind doing it. I don't think I'd want to do that all day long. And I can't have it done because of my extensions. Uh oh.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, I didn't really think about that. So I'm gonna get itchy something at all.
SPEAKER_02Extensions? Yeah. No, they don't anymore. Because they've grown out a little bit. Oh, they're way grown out. So I've had these ones in for seven months now. So we're gonna be taking them out soon and trading them for some new ones. Can't wait. Because you're gonna get a different color. Okay. Yeah, so um well that will be in a couple weeks. So that's exciting. I know you're excited for that. You know what? I'm curious.
SPEAKER_01Actually, you weren't the one who pushed that. Your husband was pushing it. It's true. He was like, I think Rachel should try this. Show her this. I made this for her on Chat GPT. Like, oh my god. Well, you were hung on the word warm, and I think that's where you were like, uh-uh, or shut off. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So I even my hairdresser was like, No, you you can't handle warm. She's like, you she's like, this won't be okay. This is not gonna end well for either of us. And I looked at her and I said, You're right.
SPEAKER_01I won't be okay. It's just that when you go darker, there's more of a commitment because you can't go lighter. But in your case, because you are you are uh you were clinically diagnosed as a soft autumn, but what people don't uh necessarily know about that is like if if anyone follows color analysis, autumns are typically like dark features and you know, warm undertone. But when you add that soft element to it, it doesn't really, it's not likened to an autumn palette. Yeah, it's very similar, it's like borderline summer, which is cool tones, right? Yes. Um, so you know, I would not recommend a lot of warmth through. However, dimension, which is what you're also going to work on.
SPEAKER_02So and the other thing that I we also talked about is I don't do permanent. So like I do that. That's right. I do like a demi. So if I do it and I'm like, ooh, it'll it's okay if I need her to you're not gonna go, oh, you're gonna like it.
SPEAKER_01Maybe it's gonna be cohesive with your brows, it's gonna be cohesive with your lashes.
SPEAKER_02We're still keeping light all around my face. That's fine.
SPEAKER_01We don't no, I don't want it around your face.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. It's only up up top. Yeah, up top.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_02So we're keeping it light up around my face and then more dimensional and rooted. Yeah.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01That's gonna be gorgeous.
SPEAKER_00We'll see.
SPEAKER_02I'm I we'll see.
SPEAKER_01We'll see. Okay. Yours is also to be determined just as my blow-drying incident. Or non-incident, just whenever it can happen. Right. Um Should we do our fun segment now or later in the show?
SPEAKER_02Um, I mean, that's up to you. What do you what what's on your what's on your agenda?
SPEAKER_01Because Well, I I wanted to talk about holidays. But not those holidays. I mean, we could talk about those holidays, but I wanted to just announce that guys, it's October.
SPEAKER_00It's October.
SPEAKER_01I'm what's she's super excited if you couldn't tell. She loves Look. I was born born in May, but I identify as I was born in October. Like, I it's it's just it's my time. Like, I feel like I I've just come out of my coffin and I'm like, oh, it's showtime. Like kind of like Beetlejuice. Um, but I wanted to say, I wanted to ask, did you decorate your house yet? So oh, oh I I I struck a nerve. Well not maybe not a nerve, but I I'm not like it.
SPEAKER_02I I don't have tons and tons of decorations. Um I will say I feel like if you grew up with your parents decorating and doing those kinds of things, then you will. Then you will. If you didn't really grow up with your parents doing a whole lot of it, then you're probably not gonna do a whole lot of it. Um my mom was really not into decorating. So we would put out because we had a farm, so we would create a scarecrow because we would get a shirt and pants and we had hay and a hay bale, and um, we would obviously do pumpkins and carving them.
SPEAKER_01Now, see, already right out the gate, I feel like that's more than most.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yours was more like physical labor. Yeah, we did a lot of physical labor, and like we would carve a pumpkin head for our scarecrow. Oh, that's next level. Yeah, so we could impressive. Yeah. Um, as a kid, but we never had trick-or-treaters because we lived on a farm on a farm, like back, you know what I mean? Like nobody's it's just you know, like your house. Like you're probably not getting trigger treaters. So, like, no, um, and that's how we were. So it was more for us as kids, and as we got older, you know, we didn't do it anymore.
SPEAKER_01Did you go trigger treating? I did. So probably what I do. You go to a neighborhood. Okay.
SPEAKER_02Go to a neighborhood. Okay. Um, my youngest loves pumpkins, like wants us to have all the fall things and do all the fall things. My son, he's kind of like, eh, whatever about it. He didn't really care as much as she does.
SPEAKER_01Age and gender, I'm sure, play a role.
SPEAKER_02Even yeah, even when he was younger, he was like, you know, I'll carve a pumpkin, but he was never like, let's have stuff everywhere. Let's, you know, decorate the whole house, let's decorate inside and outside. My daughter, on the other hand, is like, oh no.
SPEAKER_01This is a thing.
SPEAKER_02Like, I need pumpkins. Yes. I need I need all the things. I love that. So we were at an event and it was at a farm. They had the stackable, which I do like the stackable pumpkins. We had to get two of those. How were their prices? Because I feel like they're they were not bad at all. All over the place. For four of the stackable ones, which were really high, it was $26.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's extremely reasonable. Per four. There's a place around here that's literally $26 a pumpkin.
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_01Mm-mm.
SPEAKER_02No, so it was per four. Okay. And they were really cute ones. So we got.
SPEAKER_01Would you like to shout out this farm?
SPEAKER_02I think it's Twin Pines. It's actually in Shrewsbury. It's really close to you.
SPEAKER_01What? Yeah. It's um I'm looking this up, everyone. I'll put it in the shade.
SPEAKER_02It's by on the way to um Brown's. It's very close to Browns. But it's more Shrewsbury, like opposite same road. What's what do you guys what do we call it? The trail. The trail. Yeah, it's right on the trail. Um where the skateboard isn't the skate park used to be. It's at the top of the hill. Oh, with the skate. You know, the skate park's down here. They're at the top of the hill. Well, it's not a skate park anymore. Oh no, no. We all know it is the skate park. I know. We all know it is that.
SPEAKER_01But uh yes. Is it tw It is twin twin pine pine farm? Yeah. Hang on, this is saying seven. Oh no, I meant. Oh, they have a couple locations. Uh well, maybe not. That might not be the name. This is the pink something something. The thing where Tessa did the jewelry thing. Okay. Alright, guys, I'll I'll find it. I'll link it because um pumpkins are really expensive normally. So I will I'll get that from you after After the show. Um, okay, so you actually well, this is actually a great point because that's what I I kind of wanted to talk about. How I have like my fall box, okay? I have it's like two boxes. I put all the stuff out, I call it a day. I decorate on the inside. It's rare for me to do the outside because I know myself now. I've killed way too many mums. I have a little- I don't have mums.
SPEAKER_02I I can't keep them alive. We just have the stackables, and then we'll do our four pumpkins. So everybody has to carve a pumpkin. Yes. Everyone has to. Yes. Then we have our little gourds inside. That's cute, yes. And then she decorated and wanted to decorate like one of the ones that you paint, like a Halloween one, and it was a cat. Yes, we talked about this a couple episodes ago. So um That's cute. We and then she has one white one. So you two I would say you do more than well, you do more than me.
SPEAKER_01I mean, we don't have lights that we do. We don't put like Well, the big thing with the lights, that's my hack.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01You have to have lights that has a remote where it has like all the colors. But you can leave them up all year round. That's exactly right. So I just I just click the two colors that I feel represent Halloween, which was like a purple and a and an orange. Oh, okay. Is it a purple?
SPEAKER_02Oh, because you probably don't have brown.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, brown and a light would be interesting.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm pretty sure they have that, but I don't know. They have they have all the things. That's true, they do. They literally have all the things. Just trust AI. It's okay. It'll tell you. We can't, we can't AI this episode. We can't, we can't, we can't do it. Um, so I mean, we're gonna carve pumpkins this weekend. Oh they wanted to do it last weekend. I said absolutely not because it's gonna be really hot, and those pumpkins are gonna turn into mushrooms faster than we can say mush.
SPEAKER_01Yes. So I don't get pumpkins until mid not mid, just the week weekend before mid-October. Because I know there's one. So this weekend? Well, I okay, so I thought that it's gonna have to be the next because I saw that we have a couple days I think they I mean the 80s are gone. Like today was the last day of the 80s, which was a good one.
SPEAKER_02Which honestly was so nice out though today. It really was nice.
SPEAKER_01It was. It's just it's stink bug paradise. So I just I know those stink bugs are I can't say nothing. I get look, my bug anxiety is is high. You know what I did today? You know what? I'm just guys, I'm just being real, okay. So the exterminator came, he spared the crap out of my house, which is great. But there are some stink bugs that have really been been working out. They're like, nope, this stuff won't kill us. There's just a couple, less than than usual. But there's like some sort of gnat, I guess. Every year it's this, it's like um right before dusk. It's like around four or five o'clock. These stupid ass things are just hanging out right in the in the pathway to my to my front door. They're there every year, this time of year, for like for like a a week straight. And and it and they're you have to literally like heavily swat and you still get them in your hair. Anyway, uh enough was enough. You know what I did today? What'd you do? I had to check the mail. I got an umbrella. That's why there's an umbrella out there.
SPEAKER_02I was wondering why there was an umbrella.
SPEAKER_01Yep, that was me. And not because it was raining today. Oh no, I had no idea it was going to rain this evening. No, this is a pre-rain. This is pre-even signs of rain. I had an umbrella and I like was going into battle. I like used it as a shield. Oh my gosh. I have a problem. I'm very aware.
SPEAKER_02That is definitely a problem. Do you know?
SPEAKER_01Oh my god, speaking of bugs, because this is just I gotta get out of my system. So I remember the cicadas, right? Well, cicadas are all the time. But you remember how like every 17 years. Okay. So the last one was like what? It was only it was a few years ago. Um okay, they weren't as bad, they weren't bad here, but they were really bad in my office, like for work. And I bought one of those clear dome umbrellas. Oh. So that I could like hold it all the way down as the shield. Oh. Now I will say they were hitting I mean, they were really bad at my work. They were like hitting the umbrella. Like they, well, okay. I I was successful. I wear I got to work. I went to work. I left. I had my umbrella, whatever. I got in my car. And do you remember the scene from Jurassic Park when Newman from Seinfeld, but Dennis Nedry from Jurassic Park, he gets in his car and he's like, and he's safe from that dinosaur, and all of a sudden he hears the right, and he turns, and the thing's in the vehicle. Okay, that is what happened to me. I'm sitting in my car, about to turn my car on, and I hear one single cicada, which sounds exactly like that dinosaur. He was on my headrest just behind me. Guys, you were dying. If I was driving, honest to God, I wouldn't be here. I I completely flipped. I I got out. I got out and I see it, and I'm like, what do I have? And I'm trying to get it from behind. So I'm in the backseat of my car trying to like get it with like a folder that I found. Anyway, I'm sure someone was filming. I'm sure there's footage of me some on some security camera. I just don't I don't do well.
SPEAKER_02No, she's not old. I should purposely make sure they're there tomorrow for you.
SPEAKER_01The end of our friendship. I because I would know. I'd be like, Rachel planted this. This is a plant. Oh guys. I like I know it's not normal. Like, I I I know. It's okay. We all have our things. Are you like irrationally afraid of something? Mine's not irrational, though. Mine's a living thing that can come after you, but come on. It's fine. Are you like a snakes person? I feel like you're scared of snakes.
SPEAKER_02No, I don't mind snakes.
SPEAKER_01I give pet snakes. You give snake energy. Oh, maybe that's why. What are you afraid of?
SPEAKER_02I don't know.
SPEAKER_01You're not afraid of anything? Nothing irrational.
SPEAKER_02Like.
SPEAKER_01I mean. I mean, this is fine. I'm just, um, you just you just said we all have our things. Well, okay. What's your thing?
SPEAKER_02I mean, when I was younger, it used to be weather. Like, even though we never had tornadoes, we used to be terrified of tornadoes. When I was younger. Because you watched Twister, I guarantee it. Probably. Um I was scared of storms too. I my brother growing up had so many reptiles.
SPEAKER_01Wow.
SPEAKER_02Tarantulas.
SPEAKER_01We had a tarantula.
SPEAKER_02And not only just majors even worse. Like he we had geckos, we have lizards, we had snakes, he had I mean, I didn't like it when his um boa ended up in my bed. What's a bo a what? His boa constructor? Oh, boa. This is Bella. No. Ended up in my bed. He we thought that it was dead, but it was literally living in the walls because our our house was a farmhouse and we would have mice. Like field mice. And it was living off the field mice. It had gotten out because he was really bad at when he would clean the cage, which didn't happen often. He was really bad about that. But when he would, he would get out, and so he got out one day, and we normally could find him.
unknownWow.
SPEAKER_02And I can't even remember what his name was. He had so many different freaking lizards. I remember Spike the iguana. I loved Spike. Spike the iguana. I I loved Spike. But keep talking. So I gotta my dog is at the door. Yeah. Keep talking, keep talking. So he had gone out and he was gone for a while, and I was terrified because I had pet mice, and I told my brother, like pet mouse? I had two. They were my babies. That's right. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So and I had said, like, if it eats my mice, I will hurt you. It didn't eat your mice. No, it didn't. It didn't. Wait, something happened to your mice. They they died. They just died. After three they were three years old, each of them, and they died. I remember this. Um briefly. So I was going to bed, it was late. It was like 10 or 10.30. I think we had talked about this at one point. And I go up to my room and I pull my sheets back.
SPEAKER_01And there he was. No, we did not talk about this. This is not heard this.
SPEAKER_02There he was. He was just coiled into a little circle and his little head popped up. This sounds kind of cute.
SPEAKER_01Rachel's making the classic little snake face for their I mean, yeah, actually that would be the only sound effect that I would do.
SPEAKER_02You know, the limo live.
SPEAKER_01Incredible.
SPEAKER_02Um was it cute? Was he like I screamed?
unknownOh god.
SPEAKER_02I screamed because I wasn't expecting it. Not yeah. You know what I mean? Like I scared the living daylights out of me. I'm a teenager and I was like, my brother's name is Tyla! I was like, come here, yeah.
SPEAKER_01This sounds like something that would happen in like a sitcom or a or like a 90s, early 90s movie.
SPEAKER_02I mean it was definitely in the 2000s, but sure. And because I was in high school and everybody, I woke everybody up because I screamed so loud because it's like I was shocking. And and I was like, he was oh, here he is. And I was like, Yep, you better change my sheets now. I was done. I was like, I'm not sleeping in my bed now. So I I literally made him change my bed sheets. I was like, I'm done. He's been clim he's been crawling and climbing into places and doing all I was like mm-mm, no. Mm-mm. No.
SPEAKER_01Okay, but you're not scared of snakes though. No. Okay. I'm not. So you're just you're our superhero. You're just brain. I'm a superhero, I'm just you are. I grew up on a farm. Do you know what happened to me today? So I have to like And it didn't even happen. And nothing actually happened, okay? I'm vacuuming. Down, down here. Because my lovely cleaning lady, she's not even a cleaning lady, she's just a girl that cleans. I don't know why. She's just a girl that cleans for me. I don't I can't call her a cleaning lady because I know anyway, she's the bride of the wedding I went to last week. She's on her honeymoon. And she took like she's taking like a month off. Oh. And um, I'm like, oh crap, this house doesn't clean itself. So there I was. That's why I couldn't record earlier today. I was like, if I don't clean this house, I'm not going to. It was on the only time that I yeah, what Rachel's inspecting now. She's like, how well does this bitch clean? I guess she did okay. Anyway, it was down here vacuuming, which this carpet is black, okay, and I have with like a gold design, and I have border collies. So hair is incredible. Um, but we have these spider traps, as you as you see. And historically, I have seen some big ass spiders down here, and I am always on edge ever since. If you prove to me that it's possible, I don't forget it, I clock it. Excuse me. Speaking of the hairy dogs, there's there is one. Anyway, um so I'm already I'm already like looking, okay. And my vacuum cleaner is cool, it has a light on it at the very end, so I can see like what's what's happening because it's very dark down here. Um I I'm over here, and there's a spider trap right there, and I'm trying to look in it, okay. Just you know, just surveying, seeing if there's anything down here. And one of the attachments that's like just stored on the vacuum apparently fell off at this time. And as I'm coming back, I see this big black thing, which I literally let out an audible, ah, like and I'm like, then I felt really embarrassed or really stupid. If anyone heard that and then saw like what I was I was on edge, and there you have it. That's I don't know, here. Alright, tell a story, or tell tell the audience what we're about to do. So guys, this is a very interactive episode.
SPEAKER_02This is uh a very interactive episode. So all of us, or I would say probably the majority of people have a purse that y'all carry around on a regular basis with you. And we thought it would be fun to just randomly say what's in my bag. What's in my bag? What do we got in there today?
SPEAKER_01I need like a um a uh like a uh like a game show sound.
SPEAKER_02I know.
SPEAKER_01So um well, let's describe our back because you have your signature my bookbag. Your signature look. Yeah, Rachel doesn't have a purse per se. A per a per se. A per se. She has a backpack, and she actually inspired me today. I finally pressed the button on that butt one. The one we liked? The book bag purse, yeah.
SPEAKER_02The white one? I still have a book. No, I didn't get the white. No, did you get a did you get black? Oh, I yeah, it was the same one though, right? Or different style.
SPEAKER_01Different style.
SPEAKER_02That's okay.
SPEAKER_01Right? I don't know. I'll show you. Anyway, so Rachel does not have a per se. A per se. I don't have a per se. But I I kind of love that about you. It's um I don't know why. I just I've never known you to have anything. I mean, it's a dis it's still a designer. It's not like it's a cra it's not like a land's end or a what was what's the other a Jan Sport? What was the It's not like that, guys. No. This is still a bougie bougie book bag.
SPEAKER_02Um Yeah, I still have bougie. I just I do have like a large, what do we call them, tote? Yeah. Like um Yeah, yeah. I have a few that I've never actually they're brand new. Never actually put anything in them. They're just kind of chilling. I mean, chillin' spray. I mean, they're just there. I think you have to consciously I have I feel like I just um even though probably most of the the things that I have. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Very cute. Um, I feel like most of the things that I probably have in my bag and leave in there on a regular basis, I don't use, but then I'm like, what happens on the day that I actually do need those things? And then I didn't have a bag that was big enough to fit it all in.
SPEAKER_01Do the actual purses, like real purses that you have, are they are they more petite? Are they smaller?
SPEAKER_02I do have a few like for like an evening out that's more appropriate, that's not you know what I mean? I think everybody has a clutch. I actually clutch. I have a sling. Oh yeah, one of those crossbody like a crossbody sling that's still appropriate, um, that you could wear. I have one that's one side it's white and the other side is brown. Oh it's like cute. It just has like that. Um I have a couple clutches.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I feel like a woman needs a nice clutch in a neutral color for the evening, whatever. One of those, like, kind of like my bag, like a big, just a big bag. I do. I have a big bag. Not too big, not too big. Proportions matter, but yeah, big enough that you can just throw everything in. Kind of like a bucket bag, but not literally the shape of a bucket, like a tote, like you said. Um crossbody is also helpful. I have a lot of purses that I just like how they look and they're not practical at all. But I can't part with them.
SPEAKER_02I also, and here's the thing, this is why I like a book bag. Yes, or so I like things to be organized.
SPEAKER_01Is it org? Oh, we're gonna find out if it's organized. I'm very curious.
SPEAKER_02Organized in their place. Um I like pockets because then you can put things in their place. I like zippers, and I find that a lot of the bigger totes do not really have that, and then you have to have individual little other bags for them, which I do have individual bags in my bag as well.
SPEAKER_01Um my purse is opposite of everything about me. My my home and my car are neat. Neat, organized. My purse is like a it's as the kids say, it's unhinged.
SPEAKER_02Like and I we're gonna start with Amy's purse tonight.
SPEAKER_01Well, okay. I I worry, I worry that it's not as crazy as it's been in the past. Because I I have a lot of things in here, but oh wow pillow. Okay, so I have to be snooty, it's a YSL. It's a big, it's a it's a big black leather bag. Okay. Okay. Are we just we're going? Okay. Just go. Alright, I'm gonna go square. Alright, I have my sunglasses case. And inside our sunglasses. I am I am organized in that way. I have mine and I have my husband's. Sometimes he'll be in my car, and he doesn't always have sunglasses in my car, and so I think of him, and I have a spare pair. Because I'm just I'm so nice. Okay, I have my car key. I do think that's important. It gets me from A to B. And then I have oh, okay. Oh, I guess it's fun. We're getting into stuff. I have my Saint Compact, it's like a green heart, yeah. And in there is my My Blackberry Lip Flush, which I use on my lips and my cheeks, and sometimes my eyelids when I'm feeling really festive and cohesive and monochromatic. Oh, I have my gum. Okay. I think I have a gum addiction. I think you do.
SPEAKER_02That's a big pack of gums.
SPEAKER_01That is a big pack of gum. That was This is the ASMR moment. Apparently I'm obsessed with ASMR. Anyway, yeah, I I realize I'm a I'm a big pack girl. My actual keys, which I don't know why they're separate from my car key. That's interesting. Uh okay. I've oh, okay. My travel hairspray. Now we're now we're getting into it. Okay. My travel hairspray. Um, when I do get blowouts from places, I will walk from there to my car. I will grab This out and then I will spray the crap out of it. The crap of it. And guess what? I didn't do that yesterday. And my hair is already like flat. Even though they spray it, it's not the same.
SPEAKER_02And what kind of hairspray is this?
SPEAKER_01This is Euphora, which is the line that where I go uses, but they're they're too far away. They're not aggressive with it when they put it on me. I need I need you to like get in there. I need you to lift the hair.
SPEAKER_02I really like Euphora product, but I don't use hairspray. I think you are doing yourself a disservice.
SPEAKER_01Although you do have you have nice volume. I don't feel like you need hairspray. I don't do hairspray. I think hairspray makes my hair frizzy, but I just can't imagine a life without hairspray.
SPEAKER_02You need to tease your hair some more or something.
SPEAKER_01I know. I don't know what I need. I probably need extensions again. I just can't do it. Okay, moving on. Oh, I have. Alright, well, this is this is a special guest. This isn't normally in here. This is all the makeup that I have to take to exquisite tomorrow for my analysis. So that doesn't count. Yeah, it does. I mean it does. It's in there. It counts. Okay. Okay, I'm feeling around. Oh, I have headphones. Okay. I don't you just never know. Right. I take my daughter to a lot of places and sometimes I have to sit. And I don't like to be chatted with or talked to.
SPEAKER_02What kind of headphones are they? These are bows. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01And they're not great because they're Bluetooth, and I know blah blah blah. Bluetooth's terrible for you, but I've had these forever and they're just they're big old white things. I use them today while I was vacuuming. Yeah, you can. Just so you guys know. It's a hack. You can dance while you vacuum. It's great. I have my wallet. That's important. Inside oh, a gum wrapper. That's no surprise. Okay. Uh there's no money. Um, at least no cash, right? There's lots of plastics. Lots of plastics. We have my driver's license. A couple debit credit cards. We have a color analysis card that has all my all my colors on it. Okay. Did I give you one of these? No. Oh my god, what a terrible shitty friend. Who would do such a thing? I gotta get that for you. Oh yeah, that's cute. Yeah. So when you have a nail appointment, I mean you don't really need help. Your nails, you always pick good colors.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I do need an actual card so I know my colors.
SPEAKER_00Give me one tomorrow.
SPEAKER_01That was easy. Okay. Okay. That's not that exciting. Okay, that's it for the base. What's in the pocket?
SPEAKER_02I have one pocket. She only has one pocket, y'all. That's that's a problem for me.
SPEAKER_01I know. And you know what? Alright, this is like. Are you ready for this? I'm ready.
unknownAdvil.
SPEAKER_02Oh, we need some Advil.
SPEAKER_01So I need Advil because I get gnarly headaches. From from in places that like, I don't know, I never know when. Okay. I have a lip stain. I've got loud sounds today. Toothpicks. Or um well, it's a pick and floss. Yeah. Like a floss pick thing. We have a vibrating phone somewhere. Okay. I have oh, another, another lip. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I have a couple lips in here. So oh, I got lotion. Hand lotion. Now I did just take out I have hand sanitizer, but I put it in my other, I have another bag that's going to exquisite tomorrow. Don't let me forget, because I feel like I need to set that out.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you probably should.
SPEAKER_01Here's another lip. This is this is oh, oh, here we go. Here's okay. Contact lenses. Okay. Have to have extras because I have been known to like need to take them out because one gets like inside out or just iffy. And I'm I'll be driving, and I'll drive with like one eye, and I'm like practically legally blind. So I need more contacts.
unknownYeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Uh element, which is my like uh electrolyte.
SPEAKER_02Electrolights, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Guys, I am like I am here for all the sound effects. I want to put up like a triggering thing. Uh lip balm. That's important. I'm gonna put that on right now. Oh my god, another lip thing. Oh, more contacts. I'm almost done, everybody. She's got a lot of contacts. I'm like, oh wait, okay. To go along with the contacts, lumify. Well, it's not contact um drops, it's just lumify, which is like it helps with redness. I love Lumify. I I try not to use it though because I feel like your eye gets used to it. More contacts. Wow, okay. Like I have more than I need. Oh my god, I have okay, I have a lot of contacts. She's a lot of contacts in there, y'all. I have like a trip's worth. Wow, okay. Oh, another element pack and a different flavor. Okay, that was grapefruit. And one of my lash ones. No. That's important. I was wondering when one of those was gonna pop. Oh, two of them. Here's another one. She's looking at another one. Three of them. I think that's it. Okay, that's it. That's in my first. I mean, that's very valid.
SPEAKER_02That's bad.
SPEAKER_01That's not bad. Not at all. There there's I'm surprised I don't have any receipts. Gum wrappers, I'm not really that shocked. Yeah, okay. I feel like this is a good haul. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Alright, I'm gonna put all this crap away and tell us what's in your bag, Rachel.
unknownAlright.
SPEAKER_01So I have my book bag. It's really cute. It has, it's like two, it's uh is that dark brown? Yeah. Okay, it's dark brown, light brown, and then pink pink. Yeah. It's very cute. So we'll start with the front pouch. I love this. See, this is fun. Alright, so I have my look at your lip glance.
SPEAKER_02My Glymed lip enhancer. Oh I have a lip gloss. Is it the lip gloss that I that just fell over and made a big bang? Yeah. Um it's just a regular, and then I have my um Color Science lip gloss. Oh, is this the one you talked about? Yeah, it has sunscreen in it.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yes, that's nice.
SPEAKER_02I have my lip balm.
SPEAKER_01So you also have various lip products. I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_02I have a hair tie. I'll see what my hair ties on my wrist. I have another lip gloss, another GlyMed lip gloss. I have my car keys. That's important. That's how you got here. Um I have a lip stain, another lip gloss, I have my saint. Um You also have a blackberry lip flush. Blackberry, and then my saint, my other one, and then I have a wand. Eyelash wand. What else did I get you? What else? What was that? The it's the cheek one. What's it called? I can't see it. Oh, haze. Yes.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_02You wear this?
SPEAKER_01You don't wear this. You gonna wear it? Bitch, you have not touched this. Yeah, I didn't. Oh no, you didn't. I see it. I see your fingerprints. Alright, alright. Case clothes. But not on not on this. Rude. My actual detective case. Alright. I go on.
SPEAKER_02So we're gonna go to the second pocket. I might have side pockets here, but I oh wait.
SPEAKER_01No, there's something in there.
SPEAKER_02Wrapper. What my daughter put in my book bag. Um, a ninth, and then a hair clip.
SPEAKER_01Those those are side pocket worthy, actually.
SPEAKER_02I I didn't even know that that was in there, but okay. Sure. Alright, so then when I open it, I have a pen.
SPEAKER_01Oh, you know, I don't have a pen. Oh, I'm gonna add this pen here. Okay.
SPEAKER_02I have a card from someone uh from when I got my ears pierced. Like a business card. Like a business card, yeah. Not a grading card. The um one of the sticky ones that you can put on your for your phone case. Oh, yeah. So the suction cups. The suction cups. Um I have a bunch of my cards in a little case. Or are you not a wallet person? Or is that a couple of wallets? But these are business cards. Oh separate. Oh, that's fancy. Um I have for oiliness, my little pads to blot your face off. This is actually for the pen. I can probably throw that away.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, make a trash pile and I want to eat my cheese stick now.
SPEAKER_02Um, I have oh, a little moisturizer, my hydrenity hand moisturizer. Oh, that's nice. He's in there. And then I have another pocket that has keys.
SPEAKER_01Love that sound.
SPEAKER_02I have my wallet. My big wallet. What is a big wallet?
SPEAKER_01That's a big wallet for that book bag. I would not have thought that that would be in there. Oh, for wow. What a mysterious wallet. We have everything in there.
SPEAKER_02Literally everything in here. I have all my kids information, like their cards, my cards.
SPEAKER_01Guys, this is like a book. Rachel just unzipped and opened it and is looking at it literally like a like a what are those um what are those like bindery things? Like those accordion um file cases. That's what that looks like.
SPEAKER_02I have a piece of paper. Eye drops. Oh, see? Oh, but you have prescriptions. My prescriptions. Those are legit. My legit expensive eye drops. Okay. Then I have a zipper.
SPEAKER_01Where?
SPEAKER_02In here.
SPEAKER_01Oh, an internal zipper.
SPEAKER_02I'm kind of my internal I have eyedrops and my internal zipper.
SPEAKER_01It's the same brand.
SPEAKER_02Uh no, different brand. Those are these are over-the-counter. These are um Invisa eye drops.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I know these. I know these well.
unknownOi.
SPEAKER_03Oh.
SPEAKER_02I have. So for those of you who don't know me, um, I have uh chronic drama. It's for UTIs. Oh. Do you get those a lot? Yeah, so I get those a lot. So um clearly I have those in here. And all my like everybody at work is like, Rachel, give me drugs. Give me some of that. And I'm like, yeah, more eye drops. Lots and lots of episodes. So you're also a pharmacist as well. Also a pharmacist. So I have lots and lots and lots of eye drops in there. Okay, and that was the first, my first um zipper. How many zippers? Actually, no, this is my second zipper. I have another zipper.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_02And then we'll go. My second zipper is my big boy.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I'm gonna need a visual after the show of actually looking in there. Oh, I see. I see what you mean. It's literally Yeah. Okay, okay. Okay, how can I word this to people? I can't. Okay, it's fine. Oh my god. Okay. Well stops more drugs. My son's meds. Oh, it's important.
SPEAKER_02I have one, two epi pens, my son's.
SPEAKER_01Oh, here this is officially the pharmacy. Okay. It is. Really, this is like emergency responder. First responder. Oh god, okay. Rachel just pulled out a bag within a bag. Oh my god. Okay, this is this is incredible. Okay. Oh wow. Rachel is taking out like a hundred thousand prescription drugs.
SPEAKER_02Hair ties. Oh, hair ties, okay. Hair dies, hair ties. Um, I also have floss in here. I have Benadryl, I have Advil, I have Tylenol, I have cold and flu, I have sinus, daytime and nighttime.
SPEAKER_01I have I'm very impressed, and you are the person I will go to.
SPEAKER_02I have another key which I think I was looking for this. I think I might need that. Um, and this looks important. I actually have two key three three keys in here, and I don't know what they are for. Three? One, two, no, maybe just two. Nope. Nope. I have a hair clip. Oh, okay. That's and and more um drugs. Yes. Yes, okay. All legal drugs, everyone.
SPEAKER_01All legal, okay.
SPEAKER_02These are all over the lots of hair ties.
SPEAKER_01These are RX. RX drugs.
SPEAKER_02Lots of hair ties. And and eye drops. More eye drops. That is important. Because I have severe dry eye. So literally, besides my prescription eye drops, I have eye drops everywhere. I understand our household is very similar. So then I have Oh, there's documents. Oh, this is for my son's appointment, which I don't need that anymore. That was a bill. And then I have this.
SPEAKER_01Oh my god. There is another. Okay, you have become officially Mary Poppins. I am like shocked at what you have. This this book bag, everyone, is not a large book bag. This is a s this is a small book bag. And she's pulling out like all the shit. Okay, now we're getting now we're getting into the into the weeds here. I recognize that. That's your sunscreen. Why do you have that's for toes and fingernails, isn't it? Like a fingernail clipper thing? Pepper strip. Oh, well, that's important. You know, I have that somewhere. It's not in this purse. It probably should be. For eyebrows. Why? I I I can't wait to hear the explanation of this.
SPEAKER_02These are anti-perspirant waves.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay. I mean, you never know. Oh, that's something I usually have in my purse, and I don't I'm not sure why I don't. I usually have a mini deodorant.
SPEAKER_02What is that? It's contour pack. Not that I wear.
SPEAKER_01I was gonna say you I don't see you as using that very often. A brush. Okay. So in case we need to be done up on the go.
SPEAKER_02On the go. Yep. So there is um hand sandy, sunscreen, moisturizer. Yes. These are this is for blotting as well, but this is a actual um sponge blotter. Oh, okay, yeah. Two-sided. Oh, I like that.
SPEAKER_01Um let's talk about this instrument that's on the laptop right now. So it's a cuticle clipper. A cute, yeah. Rachel has a cute. This is this is if we were in a contest of like most extreme purse, I think you would win just for having the cuticle clippers. I don't this is a first for me. I cuticle clippers. I don't think I've seen you might beat my mother-in-law.
SPEAKER_02I used to have tiny scissors. I think I took those out.
SPEAKER_01Well, if you're traveling, yeah.
SPEAKER_02I mean the cuticle clippers are a big no-no too, but that's true.
SPEAKER_01Like you can't even reset, but Oh, I can.
SPEAKER_02Oh, absolutely can. Um, I think I don't think I have any more zippers. That's that's that's just all. That is okay.
SPEAKER_01How much does your book bag weigh? It's it's kind of heavy. So we're what's the term for that? We are what do you call that? When you're walking and you have like a weighted vest. Oh, it's very heavy.
SPEAKER_02It's a term, like, what is in there? And I'm like a lot of a lot of stuff.
SPEAKER_01There's a term for that. It's what you wear when you're hiking and you want to have like an advanced. I can't think of it right now. It doesn't matter. It's lost with your um what was the thing you couldn't recall early on in the show? Oh no. Still lost. It was something you were trying to recall the name of the Beyonce song. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. Okay, we brought it back around. Trash. There you go. We we'll add it to our trash pile. Okay, you you win. So then I um that was that was incredible. That was incredible.
SPEAKER_02I normally have a lot of things if somebody's like, hey, I need this or I need that, I'm like, I probably can find that.
SPEAKER_01I was gonna say you're well, you're that you're that person. You're that go-to, you're that go to person.