Aging in Place or Moving? How to Make Smart Housing Decisions as You Get Older

What happens to your home as you age?

In this episode of Real Estate Connections, host Mary Foerster has a candid and personal conversation with her husband, Carl Foerster, about the real-life housing decisions they are beginning to face in their 70s.

From health considerations and financial realities to emotional attachment and lifestyle preferences, this episode explores the many factors that influence whether to stay in your home, downsize, or relocate.

This is not just a theoretical discussion. It is a real conversation about what happens as we age, and how those changes impact one of our most important assets, our home.

In This Episode You’ll Learn

• How health and mobility influence housing decisions over time
 • Why living on a single level can become increasingly important
 • The role of community and proximity to family
 • How property maintenance becomes more challenging with age
 • The financial realities of living on a fixed income
 • Why unexpected expenses like heating or repairs can impact decisions
 • The emotional side of downsizing and letting go of space
 • Why having a contingency plan is critical as circumstances change
 • The importance of estate planning and professional guidance

This episode is intended for informational purposes only and does not constitute financial or investment advice.

Transcript

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And welcome again to Real Estate Connections podcast. I'm Mary Foerster. I'm so happy to be with you today. You know, in the last couple of weeks, I've really encountered a number of people who have talked to me about the real estate needs of their family as they're experiencing aging parents in their lives and typically the decline or the inability of the aging parents to live independently. Needed to make, maybe closer to home by a few states. So today I wanna talk to you about the impacts. What are the factors that people can use to determine what their housing needs might be as they are aging? And so I have the pleasure today of introducing you to Carl Foerster, husband, so that we can have a candid conversation about the very issues that we face, in the next five, next 10 years. And so, and they will be, of course, that we live on a fixed income, that our house is getting older all the time, that as we get less able to mow two acres of grass right out here, we will be relying on more and more providers have to pay more to maintain this property. So what are the factors? There are hard factors and there are soft factors. We're gonna be talking about this issue as we're going forward, because so many people are being impacted by the fact that their relatives are living longer and hopefully healthier, but not always. So stand by, have fun, welcome Carl Foerster in this conversation. Welcome to Real Estate Connections podcast, where relationships open doors. I'm Mary Foerster, and housing is a universal need. We are often thinking about our existing housing, our future housing, that possibly of family members. This is where you're gonna hear the issues and the people who are working the issues every day. Please hit subscribe and like, if you find this podcast helpful to you, thank you. And welcome to Real Estate Connections podcast, where relationships open doors. Today, we're gonna have a fun conversation with Mr. Carl Foerster, notice the last name. Hi Carl. Hello. Carl is my husband. And we've been talking a lot with people about what happens to their housing as they get older. What are the housing decisions as we get older? And so we fall into that category and we wanna have a conversation today. Hopefully this will be enlightening to you. So as we know, the home is often the largest asset a couple or a family has. And as we age, of course, hopefully we've been able to retire. And no matter what, we're on some kind of a fixed income. We're not out there putting in extra hours of work that we can help repair something. There's not a lot of flexibility in that way. So there are a lot of factors that can influence the decisions we make about our housing. So we're very, we're candidates right now in our 70s. And so I thought, let's talk about what are the factors that affect people maybe 75 to 80 and then magically 80 and over for what they are going to think about in terms of their housing. So I've asked Carl first to lay out for us our situation, just kind of generally. And then for him, what are the most important factors to consider in the, let's say next five years before we get to be 80, if there's any kind of need to think about that specific age. So Carl, what are your thoughts? What's your experience? Well, there are a number of things. The first one is, and that is your health profile. And what do you think your health is gonna be like in the future over that period of time? So for example, we purchased a house with a master bedroom on the first floor, knowing that we were going, if we, we could still do stairs, but we knew that maybe someday we wouldn't be able to. So we made that concession there and made sure that we got something where we could live comfortably on one floor. Another important factor is community. And we chose to move up here to Massachusetts because there's a lot of family here. And so we have people to share experiences with and people that we can count on should any unforeseen circumstances occur. And I think those are the two primary ones to start with. What do you want your life to look like as you age and especially concerning your capabilities to keep up a house or keep up a property? And then of course, where do you want to be as far as community goes? As you know, you have a relative who has a wonderful home and a wonderful community, but is now alone and far away from family. So she's making the move to be closer to family. And I think those are the two most important considerations. Yes, and this relative is 89 years old and has been living independently. And finally had a scare that helped her and her family way over in another state make the decision it's now time to move closer. So yes, we made that decision already coming up to Massachusetts instead of retiring further south from Washington DC, which is where we were. Some of the other things that come to mind of course are what are the management expenses of your property? Now, a lot of people choose to live in a condo, maybe even a detached home, but it has a condo function to it. So that the exterior and the grounds are the responsibility of the condo association. And that's kind of a nice plus as you get older. But for us, we live in a detached house. When we bought the house, the two acres of lawn in the back of it didn't seem that onerous. And I'm thinking that by the time I'm 80, I'm not sure I'm gonna be happy to be mowing it. Coincidentally, mowing starts tomorrow for the season, lasts for about seven months. So it's a long mowing period. And other things such as big costs that we might incur as our house ages. So not only are we aging, things changing for us physically and maybe psychologically, but also our property is aging. And so Carl has been doing some magnificent things to make sure that we can stay in this house longer. Yes, and so for example, one of the big considerations if you have your own home is the roof is always something that comes up. The life on a roof, various components around the house, the furnace, for example. And then of course we have various things going on in a broader sense with various states trying to go all electric. We, for example, have a gas furnace and a gas stove and a gas hot water. As they start to move away from those kinds of things, what will we need to do in the way of bringing the house up to the new kinds of energy sources that they want to be used? Yeah, and then not only the expenses of any capital improvements such as a roof, and if you have solar on the roof, guess what? That's even a bigger expense to remove the solar, bring the roof in and reinstall the solar. So those are added expenses. But what else happened this winter particularly, we had a very cold winter in Massachusetts, so we had a snowy winter. And what has happened is gas, our consumption of heating, in this case natural gas, went so high like everybody else's. And so families in this state, in this region experienced roughly a 25% increase in their gas usage and prices. So while we have kind of taken care of things like electricity, those things are way out of our control. And so that's what happens. Those are the surprises as we get older. So many families, we were at a dancing event this weekend, and unsolicited, two people came over and started telling me about their particular family situation. And so other things happen such as people our age even have aging parents, and suddenly they are dependent on them. And we're bringing people into their homes is the home satisfactory for bringing in the aging parent. Another consideration of expenses. So our health, oh, and one other thing. And one thing that I experienced, it's kind of a soft issue, but it's a very important issue is we have worked all of our lives. We have worked really, really hard. We have looked forward to retirement. And the house that you've been living in often becomes a really comfortable place to do things like projects. And so the last thing that Carl wants is to give up the space that he has to build things and to fix things and to explore things. So that's a kind of a soft issue that we don't really bring up very often, honey. That's true. And that, for example, would limit our downsizing into a condo or any other thing like that. We would give up a lot of the things, the stuff we've been carrying around for 30 years. And some of it may not be used every day, but the other day I did use some part and some repair that I've been hauling around for at least two decades. So you can't get rid of it. Only two.(Both Laughing) Okay, does anything happen magically at age 80 or maybe those next five years? What are you thinking? Well, it's the health variability. We have a person on our street who is at least 10 years more advanced than us. And he's out planting this big, huge garden every year. And so on the other hand, some people our age or even younger than us that have a fair amount of limitations to them. So it really, the health is a big thing. What are you gonna be capable of as the future unfolds? And so to that end, it would probably be a good idea to have contingency plan. That is, for example, we're going to live here as long as we can maintain this standard of upkeep ourselves and this standard of living. And then if something happens to one of us, at that point, we may have to reconsider a massive downsizing or moving or something like that. But the idea is to pick a course, but be aware that that course might have to change significantly. And suddenly, and suddenly too. We both had health issues in the last two years. And they impacted us, but they were things that once we were through them, we were through them. That's not necessarily so for some of the things that happened in a more advanced age. The decline may be steady as opposed to just something you recover from. Right. So there's a whole lot to consider when you are in your home and whether or not you're gonna be aging in that property. As Americans, we so want to have our ability in our homes, maybe to leave our homes to our children. We have all those desires. This tend to be kind of an American cultural thing, but you may not be able to. So the bottom line here is to talk with friends and family and talk with professionals, particularly the tax people, the tax preparation experts whom you know. And if you don't have a will, then to talk with people who can help you in the state plan. So those are all, that's the advice. Have we done it yet? Not entirely. Not entirely. So we too have to take those steps so that we are prepared in many, many ways. We're gonna be following up this discussion with other discussions and experts about all the considerations that not only we as older people have, but maybe our adult children. Because if we become incapacitated, if we're living in another state, or if your single parent is living in another state and suddenly goes into decline, there's a lot of work around going into that state, helping to kind of consolidate resources in homes and then find another wonderfully safe place for that person. So we're going to explore that all. Anyway, this has just been a very personal discussion. Something that's been on our mind quite a bit. We don't want to leave a mess for our daughter to have to clean up, but at the same time, we need to be reasonable and responsible about kind of what happens, should end when something happens to us. So thanks Carl. Thanks so much for the discussion today. Stand by for more real material on, what's gonna happen as we get older our parents get older and need some help. And here we go, getting ready to mow. Thanks, have a great day. Thank you so much for joining us today. And I hope you found this conversation useful to you and your real estate goals. You'll find the contact information for our guests and any links they recommend you have in the show notes. And should we be able to help you identify some strong real estate professionals in your area, drop us a note at info at realestakeconnectionspodcast.com. Thanks again and bye for now.(Upbeat Music)