The Power of Staying Connected: Why Relationships Open Doors

What if the people you are thinking about are not thinking about you because they are busy worrying about themselves?

In this solo episode of Real Estate Connections, Mary Foerster reflects on a memorable scene from Buffy the Vampire Slayer that reveals something deeply human: most of us assume people are focused on us, judging us, or thinking about what we are doing, when in reality, they are usually thinking about their own worries, fears, and lives.

That realization leads Mary into a thoughtful conversation about connection, isolation, the pandemic, business relationships, old friendships, former clients, personal notes, phone calls, and the simple but powerful act of reaching out.

Mary shares how the pandemic reminded many people of what truly matters and how her own podcasting journey began through connection with Mary Elliott and Mary McCauley on Married to Real Estate. That experience eventually helped shape Real Estate Connections, a podcast built around the belief that relationships open doors.

This episode is a reminder that connection does not have to be complicated.

It can be a call.

A note.

A message.

A birthday greeting.

A “you came to mind today.”

Whether in your personal life, your business, or your community, reaching out can create meaning for someone else and strengthen the relationships that matter most.

What You Will Hear

• The Buffy the Vampire Slayer scene that sparked Mary’s reflection
• Why we often assume people are thinking about us
• How that assumption can limit us
• What the pandemic revealed about isolation and loneliness
• Why connection became more important after the world slowed down
• The story behind Married to Real Estate
• How relationships became central to Mary’s business and podcast
• Why your existing network may be your greatest resource
• The value of reaching out to old friends and former clients
• Why personal notes still matter
• How one phone call can bring joy
• Why relationships open doors personally and professionally
• Mary’s challenge to reach out to one person today

EPISODE SUMMARY

In this solo episode, Mary Foerster reflects on the importance of human connection in life, business, and community.

Using a memorable episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer as a starting point, Mary explores how often we hold ourselves back because we assume other people are focused on us or judging us. In reality, most people are consumed with their own thoughts, worries, and lives.

Mary connects this idea to the isolation many experienced during the pandemic and to the regrets people often express near the end of life: wishing they had been more themselves, worked less, expressed their feelings, stayed connected with friends, and allowed themselves to be happier.

She also shares how podcasting, real estate, personal outreach, client relationships, handwritten notes, and reconnecting with people from the past have reinforced one of the central beliefs behind Real Estate Connections:

Relationships open doors.

This episode encourages listeners to reach out to someone today — personally, professionally, or in their community — and remember that a small gesture can have a meaningful impact.

This episode is intended for informational purposes only and does not constitute financial or investment advice.

Transcript

0:00

Welcome to Real Estate Connections podcast, where relationships open doors. I'm Mary Forrester and housing is a universal need. We are often thinking about our existing housing, our future housing, that possibly of family members. This is where you're going to hear the issues and the people who are working the issues every day. Please hit subscribe and like if you find this podcast helpful to you. Thank you. Are you a fan of the old TV series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Well, I'm not. However, there was an episode that just grabbed me because it meant so much in my personal life. And that was the one of season three, episode 19 called Earshot. I had to look it up. And in that episode, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, going to some Shishi public high school in California, is gifted with hearing the thoughts of other people, just hearing all their streaming. And she walks through the cafeteria, certain that people are going to be thinking about her. They'll be commenting in their mind about how she walks, what she's wearing, what she did for the weekend with them, whatever. That everybody was thinking about her. But to her surprise, she found out they were thinking about themselves, not about her. And she listened to all their conversation. Oh, my hair's too short. He's not looking at me the right way. Oh, I didn't do really well on that exam. I'm going to be in real trouble, et cetera, et cetera. That's what they were doing. They were thinking about themselves. So true. Just so, so true. It made me consider why I limit myself in the assumption, because of the assumptions I have of other people's thoughts. And also, it's extremely isolating, right? It's not about connections. It's all about what's happening inside of me. We had a pandemic six years ago. It started six years ago. It stopped the world for many of us. Our kind of go-go world of what more can I do? What more can I fit in? How do I make the best of that or be the best of that? And that all went away all of a sudden. And many people were then faced with very important questions. And there was also a strong sense of isolation. Nobody is thinking about me. I'm really just thinking about myself and my aloneness. Many of us experienced tremendous aloneness. And we had populations that were so alone. My single friends in their 70s, basically, there was nobody there to talk to. And that went on for months and months and months. And so where am I headed with this? I am headed with the message of it's important to connect with people. It is so important. There was a study that came out, a nurse, a hospice nurse, and she did a survey. And she asked her patients, and I don't know the structure of the survey, but she asked the patients, what are the major regrets now that you're facing the very end of your life? And the first one was, I wish I had been more myself. I wish I hadn't worked so much. I wish I had expressed my feelings more. I wish I had remained connected with my friends. And they were just so important in the last one. I wish I had allowed myself to be happier. Well, they're all pretty interconnected, aren't they? And this whole issue of connection, I think has been highlighted significantly since we've become aware of isolation. Stopped in our tracks by the pandemic. Stopped most people, right? Across the world, across the world. And we get to see, okay, what is important to us? Well, one thing that came out of the pandemic was Mary Elliott said to Mary McCauley and Mary Forrester, "I want to start a podcast." Well, I had no idea what a podcast was. And she said, "I'll tell you." And we became married to real estate. We did 50 episodes. We had a really good time. Mary Elliott had to step out, but Mary McCauley and I kept it going for a while. And it was important to me to give a microphone to people. We did it more than real estate. I have to say, it got so much fun just talking to people, right? And we did it more than real estate. But when it was time for me to do another podcast about real estate, what became so critical was the connections part. Because I learned when I started a business with the help of a coaching service out of California, the Bofini coaching service. That it is my connections already that is the source of my prosperity. And its prosperity in many ways, it's just not a future business for somebody who was used to a salary her whole life and then started, how do I start a business? But it was really about my personal life as well. And so the pandemic gave me a golden opportunity and gives us a golden opportunity to think about what is that we wish we had stayed in contact with. And I have to tell you, I've done this. I have been reaching out to people. There was a woman whom I played with when I was five on Summer Street in Watertown. And I saw her name on social media. I thought, I know that name. Well, it turns out she lives not very far from here and she has an awesome business. And it was fun just to connect with her. Today is Zuby's birthday in Pakistan. Zuby was a client of mine in Washington, DC, 10 years ago since I visited Pakistan. And but today is Zuby's birthday. So it's important to reach out. And it's not just the people from long ago. It's the people from today, remembering to call my aunt, remembering to call former clients or current clients, remember to call guests on the podcast. And I'll guarantee you two things. One, they'll say thank you. Thank you for reaching out to me. And they'll remember you. And isn't that what we want? Isn't that what we want? We want to be meaningful to other people. It takes so little. Real Estate Connections podcast where relationships open doors. Relationships. Whether they're professional relationships. Gabe Whitmer out in Kentucky or Tennessee, or it could be a former client or anybody. Anybody who comes to your mind and says, I want to talk with that person. I want to connect with that person. So in business, what I learned was my gold mine for my business is in my backyard. And I was trained to make calls. It was not easy. I was trained and assisted to write personal notes, write a personal note, something in the mailbox, other than some kind of advertisement. Something that says this person took 10 minutes to write a note and remembered something and thanked me for something I did 30 years ago. That is important. That's what's valuable. That's what those people said in that survey. I wish I had stayed connected more with my friends. So I leave this with you today. Personally, professionally, in your community, reach out to somebody today, maybe one person a day. I'm thinking of you. You came to my mind and I know you're going to be spreading joy 95% of that time. Enjoy. Enjoy your summer and stay connected. Thank you so much for joining us today. And I hope you found this conversation useful to you and your real estate goals. You'll find the contact information for our guests and any links they recommend you have in the show notes. And should we be able to help you identify some strong real estate professionals in your area, drop us a note at info at real estate connections podcast.com. Thanks again and bye for now.