The Middle Age Identity Crisis...Who are you now?

In this episode we continue to embrace technology and have asked AI to draft a follow on topic from our last broadcast! So to pick up from Self Sabotage we probe how has our perception of our identity changed as we have moved through different stages of life?   

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Six. Six, seven.

SPEAKER_02 0:08

It's rolling, we're only starting an hour late.

SPEAKER_01 0:11

Don't name any names as to who I think my timekeeping is a bit of a midlife crisis. It's just a crisis. It's a crisis. As I've got older and since I've started working for myself, my timekeeping is shit. Well, I it's worse than it was.

SPEAKER_02 0:36

Because you're only accountable to yourself.

SPEAKER_01 0:38

Probably, yeah. Well, no, today I was accountable today. I was accountable to you, but I was 20 minutes late.

SPEAKER_02 0:44

But you can't really go to be honest.

SPEAKER_01 0:46

Well, no, it's that's not the point though, is it, Lawrence?

SPEAKER_02 0:50

It's not the point, no. You're right.

SPEAKER_01 0:52

Be better. It is, but then at the same time, uh, because I I have a uh I have somebody that I know who is forever late, and it ri it does piss me off.

SPEAKER_02 1:05

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

But at the same time, I kind of think actually, why does it piss me? It's only me that gets pissed off.

SPEAKER_02 1:14

I suppose if they've told you a time that they're gonna be there, then you arrange things around that time.

SPEAKER_01 1:18

Yeah, but also, you know, they've they've got a good reason for cancelling, usually. Okay. Um sort of urgent thing that's come up. Work related. Work-related. And so you can't um and perhaps I'm too easygoing and maybe I should say something, I don't know. But anyway, uh I I say this to Gemma quite a lot, like she likes to be on time, which you know I generally do, but then what's the worst that's gonna happen if you're late? True. As long as you say something to the person, yeah, yeah. You know, I'm really sorry, I'm gonna be late.

SPEAKER_02 1:53

Yeah, yeah, I find that as long as someone lets me know that they're gonna be late, like if they're coming for an appointment, as long as they get a heads up, then it's fine, it doesn't bother me.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

And I think when you're stuck in a job, it's good to be on time. I remember I was late for an interview once, and I know that's shit.

SPEAKER_02 2:11

First impressions, Richie.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

But I did phone ahead and said, look, I can't find you, I'm gonna be late. But then he almost laughed at me when I said I couldn't find him, and then when I went outside after my interview, um I realised why it was that thing, because there was a massive sign on the front, which I hadn't seen on the front of the building that said Trident House. Oh, didn't see that. Um I didn't get the job. Didn't want it anyway. I never wanted to be an accountant.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

That was the sign you said. Yeah, it was a big sign. Getting told, no machine, no machine, you kept going. I will be an accountant.

SPEAKER_01 2:53

I think when you're in an you're you know, when you're in that environment, a 95 environment, and you have to be on time, you are almost it's ingrained in you, and then when you realise you actually don't have to be on time, it's quite liberating, I think. Yeah, because nothing actually is gonna happen if you're late. No, this is true. Um and as long as you are respectful and courteous, I think that it's not a massive too much of an issue, but it's not good to make it a habit. No, this is true. And I had reason why I was late this morning. Anyway, that kind of leads us quite nicely into what we're gonna talk about today, I think.

SPEAKER_02 3:33

It does, it does.

SPEAKER_01 3:35

Um because so last time we talked about self-sabotage, my lateness is a bit of self-sabotage, I think, to uh a certain degree, but um we have used AI embracing embracing AI, uh embracing technology, yeah, because it's a thing now, isn't it?

SPEAKER_02 3:57

It is, yeah, and why not use it and show people that it's fairly easy as well.

SPEAKER_01 4:03

And so we used AI to come up for so we had a um a topic that we were gonna talk about today. In fact, I used AI to come up with a bit of a topic or brainst help brainstorm the topics around what we were gonna talk about today, and it very cleverly um came up with some ideas, and I've used it for idea forming before, yeah, and I think it's quite helpful for that sort of stuff, and then um it actually took the script from what we talked about last time on the self-sabotage episode and um came up with a outline for what we could talk about today, um, and it probably if I wanted to, I was quite happy with what it came up with to be fair, yeah. Come up with some questions that uh actually made me think about my own life.

SPEAKER_02 4:58

But as why we do this podcast, we are in our midlife crisis, um and so the topic really for today is leaning on from the self-sabotage, is a question about who am I, or who are you, Lawrence?

SPEAKER_01 5:15

Now, and whether it's a bit of an identity crisis or the self-sabotage is a an identity issue. Um and how do you let go of the old you? Yeah, or is or are you struggling to let go of the old you? I'm definitely struggling.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

I'm not well some parts and other parts not so much, yeah. So yeah, I I have very happily let go of the idea of being in a corporate world, which when I first started with Michael Page actually seemed quite nice when I went in on the sort of graduate scheme and progressed within the business in the first couple of years and saw the progression onwards in terms of like opportunities to become a big week, you know, director, regional director, those sort of things in the business. And I know that some some of the people that I was there with have continued on that path and have and have had success, but um yeah, for me, now looking again in terms of um one of the things it's it that AI has come up with is what did success look like for you then compared to what success looks like for you now, and success then when I became involved in that was about right, I'm just gonna work my way up the ladder, gonna get to a stage where I want a big fat salary, you know, I can have the nice cars, the big house, and all of that. Um, compared to now, that is almost the opposite of what I would consider success, um, other than potentially the financial side of what those opportunities would offer. Um, but that amount of time and um politics within businesses and things like that that you'd have to deal with just doesn't interest me at all anymore.

SPEAKER_01 7:07

But you touched on the financial side of things, it's not to say that you can't have that with what you're doing now. No, no, no, you know it's it's a choice, isn't it? If you wanted to scale up and make it big, you could do.

SPEAKER_02 7:20

Yeah, but and and I've tried that, and again, in terms of trying that, it became a case of where my time was more important actually than the financial the potential financial rewards that it would offer for me to become a bigger company with various clinics here, there and everywhere. Yeah, I'd actually rather be smaller and have more time, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:43

Um do you think like um so you going in and working your way up a career ladder, you know, getting earning more money, getting a bit more prestige, and you know, um with your job titles and that sort of thing? Do you think that that is well I certainly do anyway, that um that's kind of handed to you at school as that's the the way that you need to go. Yeah, definitely. You need to go to school, you need to go to college, you need to go to university.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

It is ingrained in me from a young age because that's what my dad did. Yeah. So that's what you see, and if what you see is you know, monkey see, monkey do, um, so that's kind of that was my perception of what a job in the family should look like. You know, you go out, you work hard, you get promoted, you provide for your family so that they can do the nice things, yeah. And and that was kind of yeah, I suppose it becomes ingrained in your thought process that that's okay, I've got to go and do that. Yeah. Um, so yeah, I suppose making that transition to then doing what I did when I was about 28, 29 when I left that setup, which potentially could have allowed me to do that. Yeah. Uh I don't know if it was an identity crisis or not, but I definitely kind of felt, well, where does this go from here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And how do I make a success of it in order to still do and have the things that that job potentially offered me, but on my terms, if you like. Yeah. So and it's probably taken longer as a process to get to where we are now, but that's you know, those sort of the things that I thought would be what I wanted then, and now things that I can still have, but working probably half the hours and without having someone on my shoulder telling me I need to do this and I need to do that, and I've got to manage this person to because they're not doing their job, and all of those stresses that would come with that uh now are not there. Yeah, so yeah, I think I've definitely taken the wrong part.

SPEAKER_01 9:59

Yeah, and uh well, you and me both, I think, um, as we've talked about it before. Um I think that as growing up, for me it was school, college, university. You've got to do all those things, and you'll get a good job. Yeah. Um, and you know, that is where you know you'll earn a lot of money, and that is success, yeah, if you like. Um but that isn't always the case, and it's not necessarily the right path for everyone. Yeah. Um and it didn't feel like that for me, but that because that's what you're kind of told at school or you're told that at home, that's kind of what's expected of you. Yeah. And then to go off and do something else after 25 years of 29 years or whatever, of doing that thing, then I think the put the point you're that person for 29 years, and then going off and doing something else, yeah, can be scary, very difficult, particularly if you've got a family, yeah. Um and you almost it's going back to that comfort zone, yeah. You've been in a comfort zone for 29 years, and then stepping outside of that is gonna be scary and difficult. Yeah. And then do you almost um you know what you know you want to go and do these things, but then you're almost getting pulled back into that.

SPEAKER_02 11:28

Yeah, yeah. Like I definitely relate to that in that over the first sort of I suppose five or so years when I was doing particularly the PT, which is what I started in when I left um on the page, was that there were definitely you know there were weeks, potentially some months that were terrible in terms of money, like finances coming in, just was quiet with the business. And then it's very easy then that you kind of think, oh I should just go and get a job. Yeah, you know, why don't I just go back to that? Maybe it is easier, maybe that is the right path, maybe I'm making it too difficult for myself trying to do this. Um I can't honestly say what it is at those times that made me suppose continue. I did I I I did actually, even though I was working for myself, actually, I you know, I can I can admit this, when I was working for myself and and it did start to get a little bit touch and go finances-wise, I then did take some jobs, but I made sure that those jobs still allowed me to work on my business. So they're only like little part-time jobs. So um I went and worked for Network Rail where I did I think it was two or three mornings a week, but it was super early in the morning, like I was there from I think it's like half five, six o'clock or something ridiculous, and that's early for me. And uh I'd do like three or four hours there, but then I could go and do some PT, or um and then on a Saturday I went and I started teaching swimming at the snowdome. Okay, but again, Saturdays tended to be quiet for me in the morning, so I was like, Well, at least I can earn some money on those days and then just do the rest around that. So there was that pull back, even though I'd sort of made the leap of faith, if you like, to go and be self-employed and do things, there was it was still always kind of going, well, when you get into that situation, do this, yeah. Um, but so I I suppose in that respect I used it to my advantage to be able to continue with what I actually knew the path that I wanted to take, but in order to finance me to be able to do that without having to go, I'd throw the towel in and just go back to to doing a full-time job, I suppose.

SPEAKER_01 13:41

Because it's almost um going back into your your sort of comfort zone knowing that you can earn money, it's almost a bit of self-protection for you and your family. Yeah, you know, because it is dangerous going out there on your own. Well, not not dangerous, but it's it's risky, sorry, is it's probably going out there and doing it for yourself. Um and like with anything like sports or you know, doing endurance sports or anything like that, your body and your mind they have this cut-off point where you know they want to preserve you as a person and physically. Um, and perhaps that's you know, getting pulled back to your your comfort zone. That's you saying, well, actually, it'd be easier to do this, we can earn money.

SPEAKER_02 14:28

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_01 14:30

Um so what what do you know what kind of kept you on the path then?

SPEAKER_02 14:39

I think it was I don't know what do they call it in when you want to be a teacher? A um what are you calling your uh it's like a vocational type of maybe it's maybe it's that maybe I have a vocation that I I wanted to help people. Yeah. Um and and and the enjoyment that I got out of seeing people progress physically with the you know the training that I was doing with them was was massive for me. Yeah and it and it is a huge part of my job is to to see the satisfaction that it brings that when people have put effort into their training, the results that they get from it, and I didn't want to let that go. Yeah, and and I knew how much that is to how much that means to people purely from my own experience of it as well, and so I wanted, I suppose it's the thing where I just want people to feel good, yeah, and that translates now to the sports massage and the therapy business there, is that I know if someone can come in here into my clinic and walk out feeling better than when they came in, then I've done my job because I've I've helped I've helped someone basically, yeah, and I didn't like I was helping people obviously with recruitment, you know, getting people jobs and helping companies recruit and things like that, but it just didn't it didn't have that same personal touch because it's a job, it's not it's not a I don't know how to describe it really, but it's not it's not that same gratification that you get from something that you've physically done. Yeah, I think I think it was it that was what made me continue was that I didn't want to give up on that. Um and I suppose it made me feel good as well to be helping people, so it's like a double win. Yeah, I'm helping people and they feel better and I and I feel better about doing it as well. So and and I felt that I gave much more of me, or give much more of me to the job that I do now than I did with recruitment, you know, recruitment was all processes, you know, it wasn't personable really, yeah. Um so yeah, I think that was that's probably the main thing. Plus, you know, I had it's gonna sound a bit cliche, but I had a vision of the future as well, and and that's kind of where almost like where we are now, you know, you know, things are the business is successful, I'm going on the holidays, yeah, and um you know, we're sort of in a more comfortable place, yeah. But I also have the time to still do things on my own terms, yeah. Do a podcast, yeah, go to the gym and and and run my own calendar, and that was probably one of the things that really just I didn't enjoy about working in an office environment was you you know you've got run to time, yeah. Be here at this time, you leave at this time, you don't leave before then. Why are you leaving before then? Have you done everything that you need to do? If you have, why don't you start on the next thing because you've still got time to do more? Yeah, so there was never there was never any reward for being good with your time in that business because they were like, Well, these are the blocks of time that you've got, so even if you complete everything that you needed to do in half of that time, you've still got to sit there for eight hours.

SPEAKER_01 18:10

Has changed or developed since you know your mid-twenties or early 30s.

SPEAKER_02 18:17

The success, the change in my vision of success, I suppose, is that work-life balance.

SPEAKER_00 18:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 18:26

The it probably hasn't changed that much in terms of how I foresee what the finances of success can do for me.

SPEAKER_00 18:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 18:37

So the finances of success, and we've talked about this, for me, is now really I I don't want for anything, like I don't want a new car. I don't want a I don't I don't need a new car, I don't want any like I don't want a bigger house. I don't like I've kind of got to that like the house we've got is perfect, it's brilliant. I don't need a bigger house, I don't need new bikes, new cars, etc. etc. I just want the time and finance to be able to go and do have holidays, really. That's the big thing for me, is that time to spend with the family and let them. And again, that's what it probably comes back to the experiences that I had as a kid and how much I loved going on holidays, you know, particularly ski holidays, as we've talked about, and so to have been able to do that for my kids and see how much enjoyment and pleasure they've got out of it, that was always a goal for me. It's like that's success, it's when I can do that for my kids. I'll tick that box basically. Um, so that in that respect, some of the elements have changed and some haven't. So that's I suppose it's it's how you get there. So I still wanted to get there, but how I got there in terms of the success has changed. So success doesn't necessarily mean now that I'd have to be a regional director in a recruitment company for Michael Page or any other business, for example. Now, success is that my business, which I've developed, and it's that personal thing as well, that it's all come from me, is now successful and allows me still to do those things that that I wanted to do.

SPEAKER_01 20:11

So a few weeks ago, well a few couple of episodes ago, we talked about um goals and overarching goals, and it sounds to me like you're you've always had the vision of you know being able to go on holidays and treating your kids like you were when you were growing up. Yeah, but the journey to get to that is taken a different path to what you started on in employment is now self-employment, yeah. Um so your your goal was always that whether it was like a written-down goal or not.

SPEAKER_00 20:45

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:47

But in order to get there, you've just been doing different things or trying different things, and people looking out from the outside in, say you changed your career part way through or you'd gone off and be self-employed, people could see that as a midlife crisis, but it's not it's not necessarily a midlife crisis, it's just you taking a different path to get to where you wanted to get to. Yeah, um, and for I think that I suppose that the message is not to be afraid of doing those things. Yeah, yeah. If you're stuck in a job that you're not enjoying, Michael Pay, recruitment, accounting, or whatever, yeah, and there's other things that are gonna fulfil you, plus be able to support you financially, what's the harming going trying trying it out?

SPEAKER_02 21:37

Yeah, and I think the key point as well, just sort of thinking about that as you as you're sort of explaining, is that when I go in on holiday, coming back home didn't bother me. Yeah. Because I was like, I'm going back to a job that I enjoy, yeah, you know, and I'm gonna go and I'll go and I was straight back in, so we got back. On Easter Sunday, and I was working again on Easter Monday because why not doing anything you know during the day really, anyway? It was just gonna be like unpacking and washing and stuff, so why not be working? Yeah, um, and and when I was back at work, people were like, Oh, why have you come back to work? On the you know, well, I enjoy my work, yeah, and because I enjoy my work, why not do more of it so that then I can go on the next holiday quicker? And and that's the thing, is that I don't you know, maybe if I'd been in that job where I'd stuck it out, I'd go on those holidays, but I wouldn't enjoy them because I'd be burnt out anyway because of having the stress of being in work for 12 hours a day and driving to and from Burning. Getting anxious about like resenting the fact that the only sort of reward for it is to you know go on this holiday, but actually then I've got to go back and do uh getting anxious about going back because of what's gonna be waiting for you when you get back, that sort of thing. So yeah, and and you know, there there's definitely been times where um again when the the business wasn't as you know it was in its early stages so it just wasn't as successful as it is now, then you know, if I if I had to feel like away on holiday and things like that, then there was that worry it was actually like not making money while I'm on holiday. So there were still elements of but different, I suppose, in terms of of how that affected me, but I definitely prefer this way to what was before.

SPEAKER_01 23:39

Do you think that um so you you decide to take uh the leap of faith and go off and do something else? Um so this this is I'm talking from my own experience here from when I stopped working in employment as an accountant to then go off and do my own thing as an accountant. Yeah. Um do you think that when you take that leap that there's almost this crisis of not identity because for me I was doing the same thing, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

You did totally different things, but almost you you're almost but almost my true identity was always to be sports, do something, so yeah, I was almost like away from myself when I was in an office in a suit and um and for me like it was I almost had to sit down and be in work mode for the it took I th I would say it took me a good 18 months to get it out of my head that I didn't actually need to work nine to five.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

Right, um but because I've been doing it for such a long time, 20 odd years, yeah. I need to be at my desk at nine or whatever before nine, then I you know I can't clock off until quarter past five or whatever.

SPEAKER_02 25:01

That'd be institutionalized.

SPEAKER_01 25:03

Well I think this is it, right? Because you I had to go to col I had to go to school, I had to go to college, I had to go to university, and then I had to go and get a job. And and that is your identity. Then when you're in a job, you need to work nine to five, and then when you step away from it and then realise that you don't have to do it, yeah. For me, it took such a long time to and even now, no, actually no, I I certainly don't think that that now, but you realise that there's I think you also realise that there's so many more hours in the day that you can capitalise on, yeah. Um you don't have to squeeze it into nine to five, and so I think somebody looking from the outside in on my life is like, well, you hardly do anything. But they don't see me getting up at five o'clock in the morning baking 25 loaves of bread, yeah. You know, you don't have and this is what's been great about flexible working and working from home and all that sort of thing, I think. Um, that it opens up so many more hours in the day to be either productive or to take your downtime at different times of the day. I I would say I work harder now than I did when I was working, it's just spread out over 15 more hours, yeah. And and the work that I'm doing now, not the accounting work, like the baking, I you know, it's throughout the day, and I'm doing things that I'm most of the time I'm enjoying it. Yeah. Uh sometimes it's laboring.

SPEAKER_02 26:40

Yeah, I often think that when I you know I go to the gym every day and I'm in there at sort of 11 o'clock and I don't even leave until half on two o'clock. The staff must be like, This what does this guy do? Yeah, he's sitting there in the gym every day, like he's got hours to spare. Yeah. And then he goes home.

SPEAKER_01 26:57

Somebody asked me if I was retired the other day.

SPEAKER_02 27:00

You what?

SPEAKER_01 27:03

Financially I wish I had more hours, but you know, yeah, it was when we were I went round to watch the cycling event. He said, Oh, so what do you do? Are you retired? Just because I bake bread in the day, you know, in the morning and I come around and do it. No, I do what I like when I like.

SPEAKER_02 27:20

Yeah, and that's it. You know, I don't mind like some people would say, I hate to be working at eight o'clock in the evening, but I'd much rather that because I know that at that time I've already done all the things that I want to do in the day. Yeah, you know, I've been to the gym, I've had my you know, or I can train. Obviously, when the weather gets better, I'll be out on my bike. Yeah, you heard that here first.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

You might need to charge it up first.

SPEAKER_02 27:49

Um and and you can enjoy the daytime, which I've I always I've certainly become much more of a person who wants to do stuff like in the day now, just because I have those hours. Whereas before, like state conditions, like you've either got like you've got to train before work or after work, they're your only options. Whereas now I can do it before work, I can do it in work, I can do it after work, I can just pick and choose where it goes, and then you just find what works best for you. And so for me, I've found that work it was best for me to do it in that middle part of the day because in the mornings I'm useless, as you'll know. Um and then in the evening, when I used to train, now that I'm training in the daytime, I'm just ready for bed at nine, ten o'clock. Yeah, so I don't want to be training at that time, yeah. And it's much healthier for me to not be training at that time as well. So you know, you open up all those options to yourself when you when you step away from that corporate sort of um time blocks, if you like, of where you should and shouldn't be at certain times.

SPEAKER_01 28:59

I think it's it's important to not feel afraid to do that. If you if you're gonna step away, step away and embrace it. Yeah, don't be too scared about it, I don't think. Because it is, like I said earlier, it's gonna be difficult. And it's gonna take time to well, it certainly took me a long time to work out what I wanted to do, not in terms of accounting, but I mean those things have developed, you know. Think like the baking thing, that's developed because I haven't been in a nine to five job. Yeah, um, the bike box thing is developing because I'm not in a nine to five job, and uh I think you get stuck in this nine to five job, and that's your identity for such a long time, and then you come away from it and you think, shit, yeah. What do I do? You know, you haven't got somebody telling you that you need to do this, this, and this. But and there's always that period of oh fuck it, I'll just put my feet up for a little bit, but then you realise that you have to earn some money, true, and then you have to work it out what you what you want to do, and that new identity, the new Rishi, the new Glaz, or the new whoever develops over time, and it's not going to be the same thing for the next 20 years.

SPEAKER_02 30:15

I tell you what, I find interesting, and AI is kind of pointed us in this direction a little bit in terms of some prompts that it's given us, but when you when you're talking there about you know, this job is your identity, or now the new way that you work is your identity, it's interesting that that obviously as individuals I think we have different things that make that give us our identity. So, for me certainly, the sports that I do is part of my identity as well, yeah. And and so for a very long time, I probably like I definitely identified as a triathlete. Yeah, what you know, what sport do you do? I'm a triathlete, and since having stepped away from that, as from as much as I used to do it, where it was literally I was training every day, and I had this, you know, it was races booked in the calendar and and plans to you know qualify for the Iron Man World Championships and all of that, everything was focused from a sporting perspective on how I was going to improve myself as a tri-athlet. And and I I have found probably in the last so it'd be about the last four or five years now that I haven't been in that world as much as I was previously because of when I stepped away from the from it because of the on COVID, is I found that quite hard, which because it identified it was part of my identity, and it's like well what when you don't do it, people are like, Oh, you know, a lot of people who they're still coming now and they're oh what races have you got planned this year? I'm like, I haven't got any planned, and you almost get like a guilt feeling of why aren't you doing that anymore? That's that's who you are, who you were, yeah, and so it's probably explains on a subconscious level why I then went back to hockey because I used to be that before I was a triathlete, so I can go back to me and have an identity that you know sort of I was happy, you know, happy with if you like. I was you know, I like to being a hockey player and being part of the team and all of that, and because I couldn't be a triathlete and do that, I well I would go back to to hockey and like send skiing as well, like the ski racing, which I started to do now. And so it's I've kind of found things to do, and a bit like you would have to if you changed career, you find things that are gonna you know, you work your way around it to make it successful, yeah. And I think that works both in your personal life and in your business life, you know, the bike box thing that you do as well. That's an extra thing that is relevant for you to do because you saw a little niche in the market. You're like, okay, well, I needed to hire a bike box, and I would have had to go here, there, and everywhere to get one. Yeah, why don't I do it myself?

SPEAKER_00 33:01

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:02

Um, and little things like that, you know, is essentially how my business developed in terms of becoming from the PT to then triathlon coaching because I was doing triathlon, so why not be a coach? Um, and then the sports therapy and the the strength and conditioning side of things, so things evolve around you anyway. It's so if you make that decision to go and do something, as long as you haven't got your eyes closed and you blink into anything else, yeah, opportunities will come along, I think, and then and you've just got to be open to those.

SPEAKER_01 33:38

And do you think it's got um one of the um things that have come up on AI that Clawed, it's got a name. Claude. Claude. Claude, yeah. Um this new identity, it just hasn't got a name yet. You know, it's not 95 Loz, it's not 95 Rishi, it's not Accountant Rishi. It's not got a name yet, but it because it isn't quite fully fully formed, and I th I definitely think that that is kind of certainly where I am. Yeah, it's not that I don't know what I want to do, I'm just trying lots of different things.

SPEAKER_02 34:14

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:15

Um I know I like cooking, I know I like cycling, I know I love training and all that sort of and I want to be around that in some way, shape, or form. Yeah, I know that being an accountant was just because my dad was an accountant and that was the right thing to do at the right time. Yeah, but now as you as we've reached mid midlife, we're whatever that is, it's not right for me anymore, I don't think. And you know, it's not even that I'm lucky in in the in the sense that you know, f financially or whatever, but I've I think I would have got to this stage at some point or other because I was never 100% happy with being an accountant. I did it because the money was good.

SPEAKER_02 35:04

I think the difference is um that we've recognised it, yeah, and I think a lot of people don't.

SPEAKER_01 35:10

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:10

Or they they recognise it but they won't admit it to themselves. It's almost like a conscious battle between I actually don't want to do it, but I still have to do it, so I'll continue doing it because that's who I am. Yeah, and I think that's you know, maybe with this podcast what we're trying to achieve to achieve is to allow people to be open to that decision, I suppose, yeah, rather than to think that it's closed off and that they shouldn't do it, and and hopefully we're examples of of how it can become a success. I think so, you know, without or even when you've got those worries, you know. We I have those worries certainly. Um but if you if you're passionate enough about something and you you want that change enough, if you go to your job every Monday and you think, fuck this, I don't want to be here, yeah, then if you do something else, you're pretty likely to make it work. Yeah, your want to get out of the situation that you're in in already is enough of a driver for you to make a success of what you want to do.

SPEAKER_01 36:11

And it it and and also it's not I think it's not that you need to then get tied into whatever you're doing next.

SPEAKER_02 36:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:20

Um I think it's important, certainly the way things are going employment-wise, um, that you have a number of different things um on the go at the same time. Yeah, not necessarily you know, AI, as good as it is, is dangerous because I think a lot of people will find themselves at some stage or another out of a job.

SPEAKER_00 36:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:45

And people we need to start thinking about protecting ourselves a little bit against that. And the the one thing that I'm doing is trying lots of different things. Yeah. Um, and also and understanding it, yeah. Um, and how can it be used in all you know these different people that I speak to that have got no idea about AI, me included.

SPEAKER_02 37:08

Well we're very novice.

SPEAKER_01 37:09

Yeah, well, yeah, we are, but I would say we we I'd say I use it more than most people.

SPEAKER_02 37:14

Yeah, yeah. Um I don't have that I don't have the need for it as much at the moment, but I'm definitely gonna um I'm gonna get Lucy when she starts working for me to be using it more, certainly, for some of the ideas that I've got that I just haven't got the time to do, but um, yeah, I I definitely see it as a certainly as a massive tool for me in terms of advancement for things that I can look at doing. And I'm also I would say I'm also in a fortunate position that it's unlikely in the short term that AI is gonna take my job from me. You know, I don't think there's any massaging robots out there that not yet, you know, but I mean you know, massage guns, yeah, you know, that's that's a big thing, and I I certainly know that there's there's people who put off coming to see me because they're you know they're able to do some more maintenance and things themselves, not having massage guns and only bought one the other day. Did you sorry to say you know I I promote you know I promote them because they are good. More just they won't still take my job for the money.

SPEAKER_01 38:24

No no, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 38:26

If if you're an athlete and you trade it and you just get a little niggle or something, you know that that can help get me with it overnight kind of thing, then by all means. Yeah. I don't think it's a bad thing.

SPEAKER_01 38:37

No, I think it's just more a recovery thing because uh I'm not uh I like foam rolling, but I just can't be honest sometimes, I'd rather sit there and just in front of the table.

SPEAKER_02 38:48

But yeah, no, I think it's yeah, you've definitely got a sort of like say it can be a stepping stone away from you know whatever the decision is that your first decision that you make to move away from whatever it is that's making you unhappy is a stepping stone to something else itself. Yeah, it's just gonna be right, I made that decision that stop, yeah, that's what's gonna make me happy because at some point probably it won't, yeah, because you know, as individuals, you what you want out of life changes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:17

Or your idea fails, yeah. You know, it goes tits up, and then you either have to go and get another job or you have to try something else. And this is without going back to my point, you need to have lots of different things on the go, I think. Multiple streams of income.

SPEAKER_02 39:35

Yeah, and that's why that that goal, so I just like like you mentioned, I've had always had that overarching goal of of what I consider to be success, is that because that's always there, I'm always driven towards that, and so even if things have gone tits up with my PT business or whatever, I probably still wouldn't have gone back to employment because I would have found another way to do what I wanted to do to get to there.

SPEAKER_01 40:01

But the the important thing to remember is that you could always go back to employment if you really wanted to, yeah, you know, you and it's not the worst thing in the world.

SPEAKER_02 40:08

No, no, I've got jobs that I enjoyed.

SPEAKER_01 40:10

Yeah. I haven't. No, I mean I I I do miss you know uh the office environment more from the you know, just being able to go and have a chat with a mate, or yeah, you know, I hated the meetings and things like that, or anything work-related. The chat around going making a coffee or having a chat getting some water, you know. Well that I definitely miss those. Social interaction. Yeah, yeah. Um you can chat to Claude down by the chat to Claude now, yeah. My mate, Claude. Now his day is in sure, yeah. Well, you know, he'd come back and he'd big me up and yeah, well that's it.

SPEAKER_02 40:49

That's it. His first line was brilliant, got it all. There's so much gold in there to pull from. Oh, that's right, yeah. Based on the transcript that made me feel good that we put in.

SPEAKER_01 40:59

So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:01

Yeah. We've been uh been rounding for a bit, yeah. Yeah, we're gonna wrap things up.

SPEAKER_01 41:05

Probably yeah. So hopefully next week or on the next episode, we'll have uh our first guest, yeah, uh, which we're very much looking forward to.

SPEAKER_02 41:17

Yeah, uh it's gonna be another challenge, yeah, technology point of view. Oh cracky. I think we could definitely fit three people into that screen though.

SPEAKER_01 41:26

I think so, yeah. So we might just have to have the one camera on. The uh podcast is taking on a new identity.

SPEAKER_02 41:32

It is, yes. There'll be a third. Two becomes three.

SPEAKER_01 41:37

Um but yeah, so uh the closing thoughts then on identity for today.

SPEAKER_02 41:44

Um so I think uh my sort of summary, summarisation of today's topic is that um everyone's gonna go through changes in their life, yeah, and you've got to be, or you know, hopefully people are prepared to take that step out of the comfort zone, and if we are examples of of having done that, then the grass is greener on the other side.

SPEAKER_01 42:11

Yeah, I would say so, and I think my parting thoughts on it are that life is a journey, and what is this getting deeper? And there are many different paths that you can take, yeah, you don't have to stick to the same thing, um, and if you do decide to go down a different path, it might may or may not work out, but there are so many other paths that you can take to get to the end goal. Um that's it from me.

SPEAKER_02 42:44

Brilliant. Well, thanks for listening as always, and we'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_01 42:49

Yeah, cool. To peel back many more layers of that onion with some organic conversation. Uh right, we're gonna go now.