15. Why Behavior Strategies Work and then Suddenly Stop

You try a behavior strategy… and it works.

Your class is calmer.
 You’re finally able to teach.

And then… it stops.

If you feel like you’re constantly starting over with classroom management, this episode is for you.

Let’s chat about why behavior strategies work at first—but don’t last—and what your classroom actually needs instead.

Because it’s not that nothing works…

You just haven’t been given something simple enough to stick with yet.

Get step by step clasroom management systems the work inside Kindergarten Behavior Blueprint.

Show notes: https://kindergartentoolbox.com/episode-15-why-behavior-strategies-work-and-then-suddenly-stop/

Transcript

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If you've ever tried a brand new behavior strategy that worked beautifully for a week, maybe two, and then suddenly fell apart, stopped working altogether, this episode is for you. Welcome to the Kindergarten Toolbox Podcast. I'm your host, Amy Murray, here to help you simplify kindergarten with tools and strategies that actually work with real live five and six year olds. Let's dive into your shortcut to calmer days and more confident writers. And it's like, wait a minute, it was working two days ago. What happened now? Well, I'm glad you're here because today we're going to dissect a little bit about what causes things to suddenly not work anymore and what you can do to prevent that from happening in the future. I know how frustrating this feels because it's not just that something stopped working, it's that little voice that starts to chirp in your ear that says, Oh, maybe it's me. Maybe I'm doing it wrong. Maybe I am not cut out for this. Meanwhile, you're absolutely exhausted from putting out fires all day, and you think you had found something that worked, only to have it ripped away from you. And you don't have time to keep reinventing the wheel every other week. You don't want more ideas, you don't want more strategies, you just want something that's going to actually work in your classroom. And it's not you, it's the system. And when you find the system that best fits your classroom, it all changes. Let's talk about why this keeps happening. It's not random and it's not because you're doing something wrong. There's a simple truth. It's that most behavior strategies are designed to work short term. They're not meant to be long-term interventions. They might give you a quick win, but they don't hold up to the real kindergarten classroom. There are usually three reasons why this happens. The first is the strategy that you're trying isn't built for consistency. It might seem simple enough at first, but then it starts to become, oh, I forgot, or I didn't remember to give so-and-so a ticket. I didn't remember that that person earned whatever it is they earned. I didn't move that clip up. I only moved that clip down. I didn't reset them today. And suddenly the system is no longer valid because your students don't trust it because you can't use it consistently. When you can't stay consistent, your students can't rely on it, and it's a downward spiral from there. So if things have started off strong and then fallen flat, once behavior gets good and you're not constantly having to redirect, sometimes we stop remembering and we start to forget to award what was working in the first place. And when your students stop relying on the system and stop trusting it, they're not bought in anymore and you're back to ground zero. The second reason that systems might fail is that your new system or strategy isn't replacing something, it's adding more to your plate. And this is a big one. A lot of strategies feel helpful at first, but they're actually stacked on top of everything else that you're doing throughout the school day, which is already too much, right? So now you're teaching, managing behavior, putting out fires, and trying to remember this new system and trying to remember to use it consistently. And it just probably isn't sustainable. When something's not sustainable, it starts to fade. This is especially true and difficult with complicated systems. If your system is too complicated, it's going to be the first thing you start slipping up on. And the third reason that things start to fall apart is your students may not fully understand the system. This can be especially true in kindergarten if the system isn't visual or concrete enough for them. They need it to be clear. It's gotta have visuals, they have to have practice with it. It doesn't matter how good the system is, if they don't understand it, they're not going to buy in, and then they can't meet your expectations. An example of students not really understanding a system might be if you're using a jar and you're randomly throwing a handful of pom-poms or rocks in this jar, and when the jar is filled, they get the reward. Well, there's no, like when you earn 10 pom-poms, we get this. When you earn 20 rocks, we're getting this. There's no concrete number. It's a little abstract, maybe it'll get filled on the next handful, which is exciting, but they'll quickly lose trust if they don't see and they can't understand when they earn the reward. So while it might look like the strategy stopped working, it's often just a lack of clarity or a need for repetition with your students. If you've been thinking to yourself, I have tried everything and nothing is working. Let's gently shift that thinking into it's not that nothing works, but you've been given a bunch of pieces separately. Here, try this, try that, right? And maybe somebody even printed it out for you and got it all ready for you, but it's still just a piece of the puzzle. You don't need complicated little pieces that you've got to keep track of, you need simple systems that are actually going to stick and work long term. Because here's what I've seen over and over again. When you have a system that is simple enough that you can use it even on hard days, that you can stay consistent with it. It's clear enough for your students to understand, and you're consistent across your entire school day. That's when things start to change. Not necessarily overnight, and it won't be perfect, but it changes in a way that actually lasts long term. So you're not reinventing everything every couple of weeks. Over the next few weeks, we'll start breaking this down a little bit more into what kind of system this could actually look like in your classroom, how it can fit in a real schedule, and how to make it work with your class, even if they're feeling extra challenging right now. I don't want you to think of yourself stuck in this cycle of try something, it works, it falls apart, start over. That's miserable and it's absolutely exhausting. You don't want to be stuck there. So for today, I want you to notice this. If something stopped working in your classroom, ask yourself, was it something I could realistically have stayed consistent with all year long, or was it a system problem? Did it replace what I was already doing, or did this just add more to my already overflowing plate? And do my students truly understand this, or am I just arbitrarily throwing pom-poms in a bucket and then when the bucket's filled, they get something? Because I feel pretty strongly that it's likely your system that is the problem and not you. Before you go, I want you to hear this. If you've been stuck in that cycle of trying something and it sticks for a week or two and then falls apart and you're starting all over again, it's not because you're not doing enough. Listen, you're trying things, which is awesome. But you haven't been given the right simple system that you can actually stick with. And that is what we're going to start fixing. Over the next few episodes, I'm going to walk you through what a simple, consistent behavior system actually looks like in a real kindergarten classroom. So you can stop guessing and start feeling in control of your classroom again. And if you're listening to this thinking, okay, but I don't want to keep doing this for a couple more weeks. I want to start now. I do have a full system that walks you through exactly what to do step by step, and you can check that out in the show notes. Otherwise, I'll see you next episode. Thanks for listening to the Kindergarten Toolbox. I'm Amy Murray and I'm so glad you're here. Be sure to check the show notes for all the links and resources from today's episode. For even more tips, tools, and support, head to teachingexceptionalkinders.com or connect with me on Instagram at Teaching Exceptional Kinders. If you enjoyed this episode, please follow along and subscribe to the show and take a minute to leave a review. It helps other kindergarten teachers to find us too. Teaching kindergarten is tough, but you're not alone. Here's to calmer days and more confident writers. You've got this.