Healing Through Honor: A Father's Day Conversation

Father’s Day isn’t always a cookout and a card. For a lot of men, it’s a mirror that reflects what was missing, and it can stir up grief you thought you’d already handled. We go there, honestly, as two men who grew up with absentee fathers and learned how to navigate that reality without letting it define our future. 

We talk about what fatherlessness really takes from you: not just a person, but access to a relationship and the everyday opportunities that shape identity. We unpack the ache of wanting affirmation, the “gaps” you feel when you don’t know where certain traits come from, and the life skills many sons wish they could’ve learned side by side with dad. We also name the tension a lot of people avoid: you can make peace and still wish it had been different. Healing is real, but it doesn’t erase longing. 

From there, the conversation shifts to what helps: faith, forgiveness, and the men who stepped in as mentors, coaches, teachers, and pastors. We reflect on how anger can soften when you start seeing your father as a human being with his own trauma story, and we share why forgiveness is not excusing the harm, it’s releasing the daily burden so you can live free in the present. We also include a clear reminder about the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline for anyone who needs support right now. 

If Father’s Day is hard for you, you’re not alone. Listen, share this with a friend who needs it, and subscribe so you don’t miss future conversations. After you hear it, will you leave a review and tell us who showed up for you when your father couldn’t?

Transcript

Father’s Day With Mixed Emotions

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back to another edition of the Bro Talk Podcast. I'm Brian Williams coming to you live from H Town in Eastern Texas.

SPEAKER_01 0:07

And I'm Jermaine Alberty coming to you from Las Vegas, Nevada. And today we're talking about Father's Day, but maybe not in a way that people expect. Both of us grew up with absentee fathers, and we wanted to have an honest conversation about what that experience was like and how we learned to navigate it as men.

SPEAKER_00 0:30

First of all, Jermaine, I want to extend a happy Father's Day to all of our dads out there and even for those brothers who are serving as positive role models and surrogate fathers for all of our young people. But Jermaine, when I think about Father's Day, sometimes it brings mixed emotions for me. You know, as a kid, I remember wondering why everyone else seemed excited about this particular holiday. I'd hear friends talking about what they bought their dad or what they were doing together. And you would often see commercials celebrating dads and gifts that they would receive. And I honestly really didn't know how to enter those conversations.

SPEAKER_01 1:12

You know, I can relate to that too. I, although my I knew my father, he was in and out. And so when this holiday came, I always thought about what kind of greeting card could I give him that really reflected honestly what I felt. I have a question for you. Did you ever find yourself feeling like you were on the outside looking in?

SPEAKER_00 1:35

So it's that's a really interesting question. And I would say absolutely.

Realizing Your Home Was Different

SPEAKER_00 2:24

When did you realize or first realize your experience was different from other kids?

SPEAKER_01 2:30

Well, so let me just let folks know that as an adult, my dad and I must definitely have improved in our relationship. So let me just say that uh much. But I remember in elementary school trying to describe what my dad did because I heard other folks talking about what their dad did. And so, you know, watching fathers come to school events and seeing dads, you know, hanging out with their sons, and it was curious um to be a person who didn't have that father-son dynamic going on. But, you know, I realized that there were conversations happening probably in other homes that wasn't happening in my home with a you know with a father figure. So it was it was quite interesting.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

I remember having conversations with friends uh about their dads, and you know, I remember entering the conversation. There were a couple things I knew about my dad. Um, number one, I knew he worked for the Kansas City Water Department, and I knew exactly the location where he worked. Number two, I knew that he had an important job with the water department and he was a supervisor. And so my mom would often share that with us. And then number three, I knew he drew a Cadillac. And um, so we would often see him or see his car parked at a certain location that was near his work site. And so those are the things that that I remember about him. And in entering conversations with friends, I was able to articulate those things, but I really didn't know him and and have a relationship with him.

Missing Relationship More Than A Person

SPEAKER_00 4:10

And you know, the interesting thing is we explore this topic, people often talk about fatherlessness as missing a person, but what you're describing is missing access to certain experiences.

SPEAKER_01 4:26

Yeah, exactly. You know, sometimes I think what we miss most isn't the person, but it's about the relationship. And for me, one of the things that I've said to my father is you didn't have an opportunity to raise me. You have an opportunity to be part of your grandchildren's life. Uh, and then the next thing was, okay, maybe you weren't fully engaged in your grandchildren's life, but guess what? I have grandkids now. You can be part of their lives. And so my father has had an opportunity to be in my life, be in my children's life, and hopefully uh he'll have a chance to be in his great-grandchildren's life. It's about the relationship, it's about the opportunity for that person to be in your life. So, not necessarily the person themselves, but that relationship that often goes missing.

SPEAKER_00 5:27

And I'm glad you make that clear distinction between relationship and opportunity. And as I shared previously, I didn't have a relationship growing up with my dad, but near the my dad's, you know, as he became older and got sick and his health began to deteriorate, I think he started reflecting and looking back on his life and yearning for the opportunity to build a relationship with me that he didn't have. And he had reached out. I'm sure he had learned information about me from other relatives. And uh near the end of his life, he did develop that relationship, and he would pick up the phone and call, and I can still hear his voice. Uh, and he would say, Well, this is your dad, uh, professor. He knew I was a teacher, he knew I was in education, he knew I was a principal, and so I would enjoy hearing him say, This is your dad, professor, checking on you, and just wanted to let you know, you know, I'm very proud of you, and your mom has done a great job. So I'm glad you make that clear distinction of relationship versus opportunity. So I have a question for

The Gaps You Feel As A Man

SPEAKER_00 6:44

you. As you reflect and look back, what do you think you miss the most?

SPEAKER_01 6:50

Well, what's really interesting is I was just talking to my son, and I said, Man, in you is the DNA of your mom's dad, is my dad's DNA, and is my DNA. And no matter what you try to do, we're stuck in you. You you can't get rid of us, right? And so I've had the privilege of being part of my son's life from birth to now. He's about to be 28 years old. And that was the promise I made to myself. I would never abandon my children, I will always be present in their lives, no matter what. So I've had a chance to see him grow up from that, from baby to now a young man. Uh and what I missed was the fact that there were certain things that if I would have watched my father do, I would have known, oh, that's where that came from. So I was always left with these gaps, trying to figure out why I'm doing that. And give you an example, me and him were together one day and he did something with his hands. And I looked at him, I said, Is that where I got that from? And we just laughed. But there are some things that to this day that I do that I have no clue where they come from until I see him doing it. So just that interaction with him to kind of know, oh, this is why this is happening. This is what's going on. And what's funny is that we've often shared stories, and at different points of my life, I experienced some of the very similar things he experienced at that point in his life. Sigmund Freud talks about nature versus nurture, and so there's things in us that are by nurture, some things in us by by nature. Sometimes there were people that wasn't good influences around me. And there were moments as a young person where sometimes you want to hear your father give you certain advice. For me, there was times where I just wanted to make sure I was on the right track at times. What about you? What kind of guidance maybe would you want to hear from your father?

SPEAKER_00 9:07

Well,

Affirmation And The Skills We Missed

SPEAKER_00 9:08

I think there are two types of guidance uh that I would want to hear. First, I think every child, especially every male child, every boy wants to hear affirmation from their dad. And I remember on one particular occasion where, you know, I mentioned I only had a few encounters or interactions with my dad. As a I think I was probably 12 or 13 years old when I actually saw him, and our interaction wasn't very positive. And I didn't receive affirmation from him. I actually received quite the opposite. And so that's that's one thing that I think every boy longs for, and something that I long for. And I didn't get that affirmation until later in life, as I mentioned in 2012, when his health began to fail and deteriorate, and he was at the end of his life's journey. He did reach out and build that relationship, and he would call and check up on me, and he would, you know, pick up the phone and call. It's your dad, Professor, just call in to check on you. And in those later conversations towards the end of his life, he would always say, Your mom has done a great job with raising you, and I'm extremely proud of you. And so, although at age 12 or 13, I didn't get the affirmation from him, and it was an unpleasant interaction, I was able to get it as an adult male, as an adult child. And so I really appreciated him circling back. And I think we all long for that on from affirmation. Um, because you know, when I look at scripture, you know, the picture I I I so easily remember is when Jesus was being baptized in the Jordan River by John, you know, as soon as he was submerged under the water, um, out comes a thunderous, booming voice declaring, This is my son, and who I am well pleased. And I believe we all long for our dads to give us that affirmation. The second piece of guidance I would love to have received from my father is you know, you you see images or you see um dads and sons bonding out playing basketball or fishing or dads imparting wisdom and knowledge into their sons on you know how to fix or repair things. And because I didn't have a dad that was present and active in my life, I was not able to have those experiences. And so I didn't get that guidance. And so I had to pick that up from other avenues or from other people. So those are the two things that I longed for and hoped to have received from my dad, the affirmation. And then those those skills and skill sets, um the experiences that that every son and even daughter would hope to have with their dad.

SPEAKER_01 12:19

Man, that is so real. And thank you for being so honest because it's amazing how many men spend years trying to earn affirmation that they should have received as children. And I'm so grateful that you at least in your latter years had a chance to receive that affirmation. So thank God it was not too late to get that affirmation.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

So when you think about your father being absent and not playing an active role in your life growing up, what would you say that experience did

Wound First Then Motivation To Show Up

SPEAKER_00 12:59

for you? Did your dad's absence motivate you or wound you? Um, both. And and talk a little more about that, elaborate on that.

SPEAKER_01 13:11

So I'll just say I believe most children want their parents to be a part uh of their life. And so I think the absentee uh of him not being present, uh, that womb came first. But I do believe the motivation came later because I was determined as an adult male, as I said earlier, to be present in the life of my children and to not repeat that mistake of my father not being present. I interviewed him on my podcast, uh, The Salt Talk with Jermaine Alberty last year in December, and he said something to me that was so very powerful. He said that when I was a baby, he prayed, God, don't let my son repeat the sins of his father. And I didn't know that he had prayed that prayer over me, but it was a covering, it was a prayer covering, and it was a prayer that I believe God honored. And he tells me that he knows God is real because God answered his prayer, and I did not revisit or visit the sins of my father, and I was present in my children's life, and I did those things that he wished he could have done. And what's happened over time is that womb is healing. I use that word in present tense because it's not healed completely, but it is healing the more opportunity we get to spend time together. And so, yeah, I would say it was both womb and also motivation to be better.

SPEAKER_00 15:03

Well, I appreciate that honest answer because sometimes uh people want a simple answer, but they deserve an honest answer. And so I appreciate your candid, honest response to that question. And it sounds like that that experience, you know, both had some pain associated with it from the wound, but it made you stronger in the end.

SPEAKER_01 15:33

Yeah, and I agree with you. Life isn't as simple as we want to make it to be. Uh, there's a struggle, and the reality is this, though, is that in the midst of that struggle, you and I both know that it was our faith that kept

Faith And Men Who Stepped In

SPEAKER_01 15:50

us, man. It was our faith, and it was also those other men that God brought into our lives that could not substitute for our fathers, but most definitely could be examples for us to follow for sure. So most definitely, life isn't that simple.

SPEAKER_00 16:07

Exactly. Uh, I think many of us have become successful in spite of carrying the unresolved pain that that we've had to carry, and we're able to do that because of our our strong faith and those surrogate father figures who've been placed

Milestones And The Dad Who Wasn’t There

SPEAKER_00 16:25

and assigned to our lives, and so we're grateful for them.

SPEAKER_01 16:29

Man, that's a word right there. That's a word.

SPEAKER_00 16:32

So I want you to think about if you know, you've accomplished a lot in your life, and uh, we're still accomplishing lots of things, but has there ever been a time that you've accomplished something significant and wished your father could have seen it?

SPEAKER_01 16:50

Yeah, there's been many things that uh I would have loved for my father to be at my high school graduation, milestones in ministry. And here's the reality is that absentee does not mean not present. And let me be clear what I mean by that. Sometimes we have fathers that are present, but they're not available, not available emotionally, spiritually, in other ways. And so there were things that I most definitely would love my dad to have been present for, and then there was things, you know, that he wasn't present for.

SPEAKER_00 17:35

You know, for me, there are definitely celebratory moments that I wish my father could have been there. Uh, definitely the graduations, the, you know, all the accomplishments. Of course, uh, I would have preferred him to be there to help celebrate. But I often think of uh the movie Drumline and the opening clip to that movie is uh I'm trying to remember the the brother, the name of the brother that starred in that movie, but you know, he's approaching graduation and he goes to the train shop, train stop to uh he's he's he's battling whether or not to give his dad a ticket to his graduation ceremony, or I guess the graduation invitation. And uh he approaches the window and just when you think he's about to invite him, he does, you know, let him know that he's about to graduate, but in his anger, he responds, I made it in spite of you anyway. Um and so I know of course I would want my dad to be there, but I often wonder if he had showed up, how would I have responded if he did, knowing that he wasn't present or available uh to help support me throughout those moments. So of course I would want him to be there, but I often wonder, what if he did show up? How would I have responded knowing that he hadn't been there? And so um I know that's a long answer to the question, but I think you give me comfort in knowing that there are times that he wasn't available to show up, but there are some moments and experiences where he did show up, and he didn't show up physically, but he showed up emotionally through those phone calls at the end of his journey when he spoke what I would call the blessing over my life and spoke words of affirmation. And so we can get caught up on the times that our absent fathers weren't there, but it gives us peace and comfort and can provide a little bit of healing when we reflect on the times that they did show up for us, whether physically or emotionally. And so I think it's important to remember that. So I'm I'm I appreciate you revealing that in your answer.

Healing Does Not Erase Longing

SPEAKER_01 20:06

Yeah, you know, these thoughts that we have sometimes they can bring up pain, and you know, for others who listen to this podcast, it may bring up pain for them. And we may think we were healed about, we may think we were healed, and then you know, it surfaced up and we feel that pain. And so I think it's important to know that these thoughts may bubble up, and when they do bubble up, it's important to understand that healing doesn't erase the pain and healing doesn't erase the longing sometimes. You can be healed, but you can still have a tender touch, and so when you have that tender touch to a thing, be honest with yourself, embrace it, and then be able to let yourself know hey, it's okay to not be okay in this moment, and then gradually move forward into that continual healing process. So healing doesn't erase longing sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

I think that's one of the probably most important things that we've said thus far that um you know healing is a journey and it doesn't erase the the pain associated with uh our fathers not being there and us, you know, trying to navigate those feelings and and trying to to find some comfort and some and and some relief in that.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

So and the other key thing is you can make peace with something and still wish it had been different. So it doesn't mean that somehow you forget what happened.

When Anger Fades Into Compassion

SPEAKER_01 21:45

Uh in fact, let me turn this question around for us, and that is when did you stop being angry?

SPEAKER_00 21:54

That's a great question, and I don't know if there was a specific day or time or moment. But I think my anger started to fade when I began seeing my father as a human being instead of just my father. When I see him through the lens of humanity and realize that he is a person who also had experiences or lack of experiences that made him the person that he is, that's when I think anger started to be viewed differently.

SPEAKER_01 22:29

Yeah, man, that's that is so very powerful. And you know, we can move, you know, that that secret weapon that often helps us to deal with anger is forgiveness and love. And when we see our fathers um as human beings um and know that, hey, ain't nobody perfect. No one is perfect. We all have the capability of making mistakes, and so sometimes um forgiveness helps us to manage that anger. And I promise you, I've wrestled with that sometimes. There are some times where I'm like, man, I am so upset that you was not present for me. I'm so upset that I only talk to you when you need me to do something. I'm so upset right there. And it is forgiveness, and it is love that helps me to be able to still see him as this human being who, if he could do it differently, he would have.

SPEAKER_00 23:51

So, as

Trauma History And Reframing The Question

SPEAKER_00 23:52

I mentioned, when you asked about the question of when did when did the anger subside and when did you start forgiving, I'm reminded of a book that I was gifted, and it's called uh What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing. And it's actually by Dr. Bruce Perry and co-authored by Oprah Winfrey. And, you know, I talked about when I began to see my dad as a human being, uh, I began to look through the lens of you know thinking about as a child, I only saw what I needed from him. But as an adult, I started wondering what happened to him. And that that actually is the premise of the book. Oftentimes we, you know, look through the lens of the question or ask the question when something tragic happens or when somebody is engaged in unacceptable behavior, we ask the question, well, why did they do that? And in the book, uh, Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Perry challenges us to reframe the question from why did they do that to what happened to them. And so I begin to look at my dad from that lens, thinking about what were the experiences that may have shaped him as a child, and what wounds had he been carrying that had a direct impact or correlation on the man he had become and the father he had become based on his own childhood experiences. And uh, I'll be transparent here for a minute. You know, one of the things that my father wrestled with was alcoholism. And so, you know, when I would see him, unfortunately, sometimes he had consumed a little bit too much alcohol or liquor, and uh those interactions weren't as pleasant. The other thing I learned about him growing up is he um had experienced or or lived in a home environment where his his dad had died by suicide. And I won't go into the the details of that, but I'm sure that significant event had an impact on the person he had become and the trauma that he had been carrying and and the pain he had been carrying. And I'm I'm sure that you know resulted in some of the choices that he made as an adult. So when I began to see him as a human being and to see that, you know, the experience I had or the lack of experience I had with him was really a direct result of some of the trauma that he had experienced uh in his own life. And when I begin to look at it from that perspective, I I was in a position not to judge him, but to have a little more compassion, sensitivity, and understanding for him. And that helped me not to have as much anger. Not to say I didn't have any anger that he wasn't there, but it helped me to just understand a little more about him. And rather than ask the question of, well, why wasn't he there or why did he do that or not do that? Reframe and rephrase the question to well, what happened to him in his own life that impacted the adult male that he had become?

SPEAKER_01 27:34

My friend, first of all, thank you for sharing uh such a very sensitive story.

988 Lifeline And A Word For You

SPEAKER_01 27:43

And um I think it's so important for those individuals who may be considering suicide and know that you are not alone. There's three digits that I want you to write down. 988. 988 is the suicide and crisis lifeline. And at 988, they understand that life challenges can sometimes be difficult. So whether you're facing mental health struggles, emotional distress, or alcohol or drug use concerns, or just need someone to talk to. There are caring counselors that are there for you. I want to let you know, once again, you are not alone. You can go to 988lifeline.org for more information about the 988 Lifeline. On that website, you can click a link to call, to text, to chat. And even if you're deaf or hard of hearing, there's an opportunity for someone there to help you. Brian, thank you so much for sharing um that story because I think so many times when folks think about forgiveness, people think that forgiveness means saying that hurt didn't matter. That's not the case. Sometimes forgiveness means releasing the burden of carrying the hurt every day.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

And I think that's that's good food for thought. Um you know forgiving doesn't mean that we didn't have a painful experience or that it didn't matter. Uh, I agree with you. It it means that we are releasing the burden of carrying that hurt and we're releasing the the desire or the obligation we feel um that we have to you know get back at somebody or uh replicate that hurt and that anger against them because of what was done or what we perceive to have been done to us.

SPEAKER_01 30:04

You know, and we have to remember that it's not about changing the past when we forgive somebody, it's about freeing ourselves so that we can live in a now moment because unforgiveness often keeps us stuck, and so forgiveness and love is about freeing ourselves for our now and for our future.

SPEAKER_00 30:35

And I'm

Mentors Coaches Pastors And Gratitude

SPEAKER_00 30:36

glad to hear you say that about not getting stuck in the past, but living in the present moment and thinking about the future, and as a result of that, I'm sure there have been many, many people who have stepped in and played the role of surrogate dad or father when your your dad, my dad were absent. So for you, who stepped in to fill the gap for you?

SPEAKER_01 31:02

Well, several men from uh people who were civic leaders to pastors to men who didn't even know that they were intentionally mentoring, but just by the lives they lived. Let me say I want to be like that person when I grow up. These men probably don't really realize themselves how much influence that they had on me. My former pastor, the late Raymond Davis Jr. of the Greater Corinthian, non-denominational church, was the first pastor that ever took me out and brought me suits and shoes. Uh to this day, I'll never forget that. The shoes and the ties, and this is how you ought to dress. And man, I tell you, it was one of those moments that I would never forget. So I'm grateful for Pastor Raymond Davis Jr., the brothers who stayed late, the teacher who believed in us, uh, the mentors who took the time to be with us. I want to thank y'all. And uh and so many other people, you may not even know that she was doing it, but if you hear this podcast and you hear my voice, I just want to say thank you. I I feel like you know how you you at church, you start calling names and you don't want to miss somebody's name. But I'm grateful for all the men that intentionally and unintentionally poured into my life. What about you, Brian?

SPEAKER_00 32:30

I agree with you. There have been um men intentionally and unintentionally who poured into my life. They were coaches and mentors and men who invested in me and sometimes corrected me when I didn't want to be corrected or challenged me and even encouraged me. And I I, as I answer this question, I see images of their faces and I see their names. I'm gonna just call out a couple of them real quick. Uh, you know, in a previous podcast, we talked about me being connected to the YMCA. And so a lot of these brothers were employed at the YMCA. And uh, you know, of course, my Kansas City pastor, Reverend Eric D. Williams, pastor of the Calvary Temple Baptist Church. Before he started pastoring, he was a program director at the YMCA. And then there's Dave Smith, who was the executive director of the YMCA, and Amos Willingham, who was a program director, and Victor Marks, and so many others. I don't have time to call all their names, but these were men who poured into me, invested in me, exposed me uh to outdoor education and experiences and helped me to navigate getting my first job. And so I'm very grateful and appreciative of them. And I'm I'm glad you uh acknowledged and affirmed and lifted uh those special men up. You know, sometimes God sends us these surrogate fathers by assignment when fathers by biology are absent. And so as we close, let me ask you just one final question.

Advice For Men Dreading Father’s Day

SPEAKER_00 34:07

What would you say to the man listening who still struggles every Father's Day?

SPEAKER_01 34:13

Um, I would tell them to acknowledge to her that it's okay to grieve what you didn't have, but please don't stop there. Also recognize the people who helped you become who you are. And I know it's Father's Day, but I do want to thank all of the mothers who held it down. And while they couldn't be the men in our lives, they still did their best to love and nurture us and to give us the care that we needed. And so they couldn't be the men in our lives, but I promise you one thing, they built some character, and I want to thank them also for being present when the fathers were absent. And your father telling you that your mom did a good job. I'm so grateful to hear that he gave her credit and honor where honor was due. And so I want you to recognize the people who helped you become who you are, and remember that your story isn't defined by who left, but it is defined also by those who stayed and shaped you to be the man that you are.

SPEAKER_00 35:39

And I agree with you. I want to especially thank those women and my mom and all the moms who played that defining role in our lives when dad could not be there. And so they built character and grit and determination uh and instilled that in us. And so we we say thank you. And so I'll add this you can honor your father without ignoring your pain, you can forgive without forgetting, and you can become the kind of man you needed when you were younger. And

Honoring Our Fathers And Closing Blessing

SPEAKER_00 36:12

Jermaine, I think it's a good a good place to pause here because on our Mother's Day tribute, you and I paused and we spoke out loud the names of our moms. And I think as we honor our fathers this day, whether they're alive or not, I think it's a good place for you and I to acknowledge and to mention our dad's names and to um just honor them in that special way. So I'll call out my dad's name. He is deceased and uh is no longer alive, but he is in my heart, and so I'll call out the name of Billy Williams.

SPEAKER_01 36:47

And my dad is uh still with me, 69 years old, uh, and I call out Jimmy Jones. My friends, listen, we never were given perfect parents, and we have to make sure that we understand that it is presence over perfection, and I'll repeat that presence over perfection. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So happy Father's Day to every father, to every mentor, to every coach, every uncle, every grandfather, every father figure who continues to show up.

SPEAKER_00 37:27

And Jermaine, I wish you a happy Father's Day because uh you are the dad, proud father of three children. And so I wish you a happy Father's Day. And to every man who's on a healing journey, we encourage you to keep going. And the story isn't over.

SPEAKER_01 37:47

And I want to thank you, Brian, for being that role model to every child that has come into your life, whether it be in the Kansas City School District all the way to spring branch. You have been a role model uh and a mentor to so many children. So these are your children by school.

SPEAKER_00 38:13

They sure are now.

SPEAKER_01 38:16

Yeah, and what is so amazing is the students who come to you and are so excited to see you when they grow up. You were my teacher, you were my assister principal, you were my principal. And so, although you may not have any biological children, my friend, you have touched so many children in such a positive way that I want to thank you for fathering children that you did not birth, but most definitely who you carry in your heart and in your spirit.

SPEAKER_00 38:48

Received, my friend, received. So, this has been another edition of the Bro Talk Podcast Real Men, Real Talk, Real Transformation.