127 - Raised on Cafecito - Growing up Cuban in America

The one where Fern and Nat grab a colada and turn the volume up! This week, Fern and Nat dive into the hilarious, nostalgic, and slightly chaotic reality of growing up Cuban in America.
We’re breaking down the ultimate Cuban Starter Pack—from cookie tins filled strictly with sewing supplies and plastic-wrapped couches to the supernatural lore of abuelas. But we’re also getting real about the bittersweet hustle of growing up between two worlds. It wasn't always easy, but we bi-lingualed it the best we could. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Welcome back to Lumiless Table Talk. Where it's possible you grew up in a house where yelling didn't mean anger, it meant love. On volume turn to eleven. I'm firm.

SPEAKER_02 0:16

I'm not. So grab your favorite cup of coffee, pull up a chair, and let's chat. Well, actually, that's because Cuban families, they don't talk. They emotionally speed run through conversations. It sounds like we're yelling, but we're not. We're just speeding.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

We're just trying to get the point across as quickly as possible and at at a projectional volume so that everyone else can hear it, I guess. So today we are specifically talking about being raised on cafecito in a Cuban household.

SPEAKER_02 1:06

Okay. Or Domino's. Or dominoes. No, you have both, actually.

SPEAKER_03 1:11

Alright.

SPEAKER_02 1:13

Have you ever heard your mom screaming your full government name and instantly assume your life is over completely? And and all you did was forget to take the chicken out of the freezer, by the way.

SPEAKER_03 1:28

That that that's well, let that be a lesson. Don't ever forget. When your mom says Saka boy, take the chicken out. Take the chicken out. And get it done. Because if it's not on a plate, your full government name is being done. You get your full government name and possible, possible retaliation.

SPEAKER_02 1:56

No, guaranteed. It's guaranteed that's gonna happen. It's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_03 2:00

You're gonna get socked on the head.

SPEAKER_02 2:02

For sure. Like you in my household, you could not forget um to take out whatever they told you to take out for dinner because that was a whole whole ordeal.

SPEAKER_03 2:14

I'm sure. I'm sure.

SPEAKER_00 2:15

But, anyways, got a feeling you can't contain. Plug into our electric maid. No rules and no limitations, just real good conversations. So pull up the seat. The talk is gone. This is limitless table talk.

SPEAKER_02 2:47

This episode is sponsored by Sunset Tattoo Parlor.

SPEAKER_03 2:52

Hey, are you thinking about getting a tattoo? Maybe something meaningful. Maybe something to cover up the emotional scars from getting La Chancleta after speaking English to your abuela.

SPEAKER_02 3:02

Text Limitless to David at 305-7108413 for a special deal and tell him Fernanette sent you.

SPEAKER_03 3:13

Because you know we did.

SPEAKER_02 3:15

That's limitless. To David at 305-710-8413, just in case.

SPEAKER_03 3:26

Alright, alright. So why did every Cuban grandma treat AC or air conditioning? Because for some people they can't uh put all that together, like it was a criminal offense.

SPEAKER_02 3:40

I that's so true because I would go to my grandmother's house, and if you touched that thermostat, I was getting a full-on TED talk about the electrical. Like full on, kid you not, full on TED talk.

SPEAKER_03 3:59

What's funny is um the house that I grew up in, uh, we didn't have central AC. You know, we had some rooms that had ACs on the wall. Not every room had ACs.

SPEAKER_02 4:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 4:15

But the majority of the rooms had ACs, right? So you would end up sometimes in a room with no AC.

SPEAKER_04 4:26

And then you'd have to remember having that problem.

SPEAKER_03 4:28

And then you'd have to get one of those uh standing fans that turn, but it makes a lot of noise because back in the day, you know, everything was made of metal and it would go all the way across.

SPEAKER_02 4:43

Okay, I don't remember like my fan sounding like that to begin with, but okay.

SPEAKER_03 4:48

Maybe I just have the emotional scars from that.

SPEAKER_02 4:51

Anyways, my grandparents didn't like us to touch the AC you um the thermostat for the AC. And what made it worse is my grandparents had plastic on their sofas.

SPEAKER_03 5:04

Oh, I remember it. Because you would stick.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

They were plastic, literally plastic, and it was always warm. And we live in Florida, so it's very, very hot and humid in Florida.

SPEAKER_03 5:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 5:20

So whenever like the family would gather at my grandparents' house and we would sit on that sofa. Oh my gosh, you better not be wearing a shorts. Because you were stuck to that sofa for sure.

SPEAKER_03 5:33

If you were wearing shorts, you would peel.

SPEAKER_02 5:36

Like they had the plastic on it, like the couch owed taxes or something. Like, I don't understand. I never understood that concept.

SPEAKER_03 5:49

Um, it's it's weird to me. Like, I didn't have that. I didn't have that because we had the uh the 1960s zebra colored couch.

SPEAKER_02 5:58

I don't remember what color was the couch. One one of my one set of my grandparents, my mom's parents, is the one that had the plastic on the until the 80s came around.

SPEAKER_03 6:07

The 80s came around, and all of a sudden everything was leather.

SPEAKER_02 6:11

I would have taken leather over plastic.

SPEAKER_03 6:14

But we had the popcorn roof with the glitter.

SPEAKER_02 6:18

Glitter, that were you raised, yeah?

SPEAKER_03 6:20

Yes. For some reason, in the 80s, they decided to uh to update and make everything very 80s. And uh we had the popcorn roof, and for some reason it had glitter. I'll never forget that.

SPEAKER_02 6:36

Because if I'm more concerned of where you were raised if I crazy.

SPEAKER_03 6:41

If I was tossing a tennis ball or a baseball and I accidentally hit the roof. First of all, you shouldn't have been tossing it towards the roof. Listen, I was a kid and I was dumb.

SPEAKER_02 6:50

Well, you know.

SPEAKER_03 6:51

Anyways, I would toss the stuff up and it would hit the roof. Or or even sometimes, sometimes I would play with my G.I. Joe's and I would toss them in the roof.

SPEAKER_02 7:02

You shouldn't be tossing them into the roof.

SPEAKER_03 7:05

Make it snow.

SPEAKER_02 7:06

What is wrong with you?

SPEAKER_03 7:07

Everything.

SPEAKER_02 7:07

No wonder you got your your government name used often. Oh, I got beat.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Um and then and then and then God forbid that I tore something in my in my clothes, my uniform or something. And then Abuela would say, Hey, buca la latica.

SPEAKER_02 7:28

And I'm like She would tell you, go look for a can.

SPEAKER_03 7:32

Go look for the can. Yes, thank you. I appreciate you. Uh I appreciate you translating.

SPEAKER_02 7:40

I'm your walking translator.

SPEAKER_03 7:42

Thank you. Uh so she would say, Go buca la latica.

SPEAKER_02 7:47

Go look for the can.

SPEAKER_03 7:48

Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 7:49

Little can. Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_03 7:53

Sorry. Um, and it was the blue can of cookies.

SPEAKER_02 8:00

Wait, well, did it have cookies or did it have the sewing stuff?

SPEAKER_03 8:04

It had the sewing stuff in it. No cookies! Man, you know how disappointing that is to o to to know that you didn't know what you were opening. I had no idea. I just know that I had to go get the can.

SPEAKER_02 8:21

I think almost every Hispanic household had a sewing kit inside the man, what was it caught?

SPEAKER_03 8:27

Man, they were like those uh shortbread cookies.

SPEAKER_02 8:30

The ones that had the little They have it now during the holidays.

SPEAKER_03 8:33

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They they they would have like the square one with the sugar on the top. And it's the big sugar, right? Yeah, and then there was like a then the one that looked like a like a pretzel. Yeah, with the some had the sugar, some were not.

SPEAKER_02 8:48

Yeah, we mean what are those, man?

SPEAKER_03 8:50

Those German German or Belgian cookies?

SPEAKER_02 8:52

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 8:53

But they're shortbread cookies.

SPEAKER_02 8:54

Definitely you went to a Hispanic household and you saw one of those tin cans. Don't be fooled, there's no cookies in it. False alarm, no cookies. It's a sewing kit. Just like you would go into a Hispanic, I don't know, or Cuban, so for us. We're Cuban.

SPEAKER_03 9:08

Let's let's just let's just say what it is.

SPEAKER_02 9:10

I can only speak about us Cubans. You would go into a Cuban refrigerator and you saw like the tub of butter, and you're like, oh, butter, you guys love butter, but you open it up, it's frijoles.

SPEAKER_03 9:22

Yeah, it's or if you don't know frijoles, it's beans. What?

SPEAKER_02 9:26

It's black beans.

SPEAKER_03 9:28

I thought it was frigoles.

SPEAKER_02 9:29

No, no, you're just saying the Spanish word.

SPEAKER_03 9:33

It's not frigoles.

SPEAKER_02 9:35

No, I no, anyways, don't listen to him. It's black beans. Um with the leaf in it. You would always find leftovers by it. For flavor.

SPEAKER_03 9:45

It had a leaf.

SPEAKER_02 9:46

I'm gonna say from a tree. I'm going to take your Hispanic card from it.

SPEAKER_03 9:50

I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_02 9:50

I'm gonna take your cube card.

SPEAKER_03 9:52

I'm just saying that it always had a leaf in it. But yes, it was the country croc, the big old tub of country croc. And there was no butter up in there.

SPEAKER_02 10:02

Never.

SPEAKER_03 10:03

It was for Joel's.

SPEAKER_02 10:04

It started with butter.

SPEAKER_03 10:05

It was for Joel's.

SPEAKER_02 10:07

It started as butter.

SPEAKER_03 10:08

It started, it it once had a life, and its life was butter.

SPEAKER_02 10:13

It once had its true name in it. And now it's not a good thing. Um, yeah. It anyways, you go to a Cuban's household, you don't know really what you're gonna get in it. Um, it may or may not have the right contents of food in it. Just like the ovens. I was just talking to some friends about this the other day. All about the ovens. Um, yes.

SPEAKER_03 10:37

The fact that ours is a storage unit.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

Pretty much, yes. Every Cuban household, pretty much, um, maintains their oven as storage.

SPEAKER_03 10:49

That's where all the you know that's where all the bigger pot and pans are.

SPEAKER_02 10:53

Exactly. That's the storage.

SPEAKER_03 10:55

Or the or the baking sheets that never get used for actual baking.

SPEAKER_02 10:59

I was just talking about this the other day because um the friends I was with are not Hispanic and their oven was empty. Because I was like, oh, are we gonna use your oven? Do you need me to take stuff out? And they're like, what are you talking about? We haven't put anything in yet.

SPEAKER_03 11:13

And I you're like, what is not correct? What is wrong with you? Where are you from? Like, where are you from?

SPEAKER_02 11:22

It was empty.

SPEAKER_03 11:23

How do you how do you put all of your stuff in your in your in your pantries and drawers? How does it even fit?

SPEAKER_02 11:31

How do you find space, right?

SPEAKER_03 11:34

I mean, if you come to our house, you're gonna find no space. No space because they're all full of cups.

SPEAKER_02 11:41

Tumblers.

SPEAKER_03 11:42

Tumblers. Because I have a tumbler addiction.

SPEAKER_02 11:45

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 11:45

I will constantly buy tumblers and cups. I like cups. I like cups. But if it's a Stanley and it comes in a different color, I want it. My god, you have to. And then you say, You don't need it. And then I say, I know I don't need it. But I want it.

unknown 12:04

My god.

SPEAKER_02 12:05

But yes, if I found it, I'm gonna ignore that. I found it really weird to open their oven and it was ready for me to start war, you know, cooking in it. Like I found it really weird that it wasn't gonna take me 20 minutes to empty the oven first.

SPEAKER_03 12:19

You're like, I can't what where's where's all the stuff?

SPEAKER_02 12:21

Because usually it takes the stuff out and you're like piling it.

SPEAKER_03 12:25

You put it on the top.

SPEAKER_02 12:26

Yeah, you're like piling it and piling it and hoping it doesn't fall. Like, this is where jungle comes into place, basically. Cuban Jenga is amazing. But no, they didn't have this problem. They looked at me like I was strange.

SPEAKER_03 12:39

Are they not Hispanic?

SPEAKER_02 12:40

No, they were not Hispanic. That's what I started off with. They were not Hispanic, but Yeah, yeah, but how not Hispanic? They're not at all Hispanic. At all.

SPEAKER_03 12:50

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 12:51

At all, at all.

SPEAKER_03 12:52

Shocking.

SPEAKER_02 12:52

Completely.

SPEAKER_03 12:53

They had no idea what I was talking about. They're like, what do you mean you use your stove to put stuff in?

SPEAKER_02 12:58

Yeah, I said I think I've used my stove more for um how do you call this storage than I've ever used my stove, period. Because I don't have space anywhere. I mean, we have a lot of cabinets.

SPEAKER_03 13:14

I don't have we have a lot of cabinets and they're all full of cups.

SPEAKER_02 13:17

Your problem. We have one, two, I'm looking at it, three. Three cabinets with three shelves each. Full of full of tumblers because you don't stop buying tumblers. And then at the store, you're like, ooh, I'll throw away one when I get home. We're gonna go. You never throw it away. And you never do.

SPEAKER_03 13:37

Never throw it away.

SPEAKER_02 13:38

Never do.

SPEAKER_03 13:39

I never do.

SPEAKER_02 13:41

Like, that's a whole other topic.

SPEAKER_03 13:43

You're absolutely right.

SPEAKER_02 13:44

But moving on from that.

SPEAKER_03 13:46

So here's here's here's a here's a little tale. Here's a little tale from when I was a a young'in.

SPEAKER_02 13:52

Okay. Young'in.

SPEAKER_03 13:54

A youngin'. I would walk home from school sometimes. Most of the time. Every time. I think if it was every time. Two days a week, I can smell from like a block away that the croquetas were being made.

SPEAKER_02 14:16

And not just any croquetas. The ones in the frozen. What are they? Like caseritas or something? What were they called?

SPEAKER_03 14:24

We never had that. We never had that.

SPEAKER_02 14:28

They saw them at the frozen section, right?

SPEAKER_03 14:29

Because my my my visawela, my great grandmother.

SPEAKER_02 14:33

Great grandmother.

SPEAKER_03 14:34

Thank you for translating so slowly. She uh made them by hand.

SPEAKER_02 14:40

Oh no, you see, we just, you know.

SPEAKER_03 14:43

She would make them. And then no, because what would happen is we had the box in the freezer.

SPEAKER_02 14:49

Oh, it started off with the stuff in it? Or no. I had to box.

SPEAKER_03 14:54

That was for guests. So if you came over to have uncafecito.

SPEAKER_02 14:58

A coffee?

SPEAKER_03 14:59

A Cuban coffee, actually. Uh-huh. To do visitas.

SPEAKER_02 15:03

To come for a visit. This is how we're gonna do our episode.

SPEAKER_03 15:09

She would bring out the croquetas. Croquettes. And and and and she was a classy dame. Crazy but classy. She would bring out the croquetas. Croquettes. With wigallerigas. Crackers. And limon. Lemon? Lemon. We had a lemon tree in the backyard growing up.

SPEAKER_02 15:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 15:31

So they were not only lemons, they were our lemons, fresh lemons.

SPEAKER_02 15:35

Fancy people.

SPEAKER_03 15:36

Yeah. And then and then I don't know, sometime in the late 80s, maybe early 90s, there was like a citrus thing. They made us cut the tree down.

SPEAKER_02 15:43

Really? Yeah. I don't know. I've never really had that.

SPEAKER_03 15:46

Yeah, so so that's how that's what would happen, right? When I would get home, you know, maybe like twice a week.

SPEAKER_02 15:51

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 15:52

I had fresh homemade croquetas. Croquettes.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

This is where we're going with this, man. Just just go with it.

SPEAKER_03 16:05

And we had a fryer.

SPEAKER_02 16:08

Not an air fryer.

SPEAKER_03 16:10

No, it was a deep fryer.

SPEAKER_02 16:11

This is where you would pour like a whole gallon of oil in it. So now comes to die from it.

SPEAKER_03 16:18

Now comes the oil part. And it wasn't oil, it was lard.

SPEAKER_02 16:23

Well, yes. I don't know in other backgrounds. I just know about the Cuban one. We would have under our sink, like it was like a silver, at least we did, a silver tin can.

SPEAKER_03 16:35

The recycler.

SPEAKER_02 16:36

It was like a silver.

SPEAKER_03 16:37

The recycler of the oil.

SPEAKER_02 16:39

It was a silver.

SPEAKER_03 16:39

That's what that was.

SPEAKER_02 16:41

Tin can. And you would pour your oil under the table.

SPEAKER_03 16:44

And it would say, and what was funny is that it had printed on it aceite. Oil.

SPEAKER_02 16:50

Well, you would pour it, because you know, you you wouldn't pour pour your oil in the garbage or in the sink.

SPEAKER_03 16:58

That's uh that's a catastrophe waiting to happen.

SPEAKER_02 17:00

You would you would pour it into the silver tin. Can listen, as a child, I always thought that if I poured that oil down the sink, my house was gonna blow up. Yes, okay.

SPEAKER_03 17:13

A hundred percent.

SPEAKER_01 17:14

That's what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 17:17

I don't understand. That is exactly what happens.

SPEAKER_01 17:19

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 17:20

Still to this day, still to this day, I am paranoid about it.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

Oh no, it doesn't happen. I I've I've let some oil go down this sink. What? For real.

SPEAKER_03 17:34

You're kidding me.

SPEAKER_02 17:35

No, I'm not joking. Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_03 17:37

I am about to have a convulsion.

SPEAKER_02 17:39

For real, I've had oil go down the sink. What? The house is still standing, man.

SPEAKER_03 17:46

How is that even possible?

SPEAKER_02 17:48

Which part that the house is still standing or that I did that?

SPEAKER_03 17:51

Both things. They go hand in hand.

SPEAKER_02 17:54

It's my house.

SPEAKER_03 17:55

I think it's wrong with you. You are just begging for Armageddon.

unknown 18:00

Oh my god, whatever.

SPEAKER_03 18:02

Begging for Armageddon. I take risks. Those are risks I am gonna have to deal with later. That's what it is. That's what it comes down to. Is that these are your risks that are my consequence?

SPEAKER_02 18:16

It happened. I it fell and I said, oh, oh, oh well.

SPEAKER_03 18:22

You don't even care that I'm gonna have to deal with that at some point.

SPEAKER_02 18:25

It was fine. The house is still standing.

SPEAKER_03 18:27

I'm gonna have to deal with that at some point.

SPEAKER_02 18:29

That happened like when we first moved in. Oh could you? What? How could you? I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_00 18:42

Blasphemo!

SPEAKER_04 18:44

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 18:46

How could you? Terrible. I am I am in shock. You know what? I am I am in I I'm gonna use an early 2000s phrase. I am in shock and awe. Shock and awe.

SPEAKER_02 19:03

I'm just saying it happened. The house is fine.

SPEAKER_03 19:06

I cannot. Today.

SPEAKER_02 19:10

You didn't even know it happened when we first moved in.

SPEAKER_03 19:13

Oh, maybe that's why I've been having to deal with all of the sink backup problems. Please, there's no that was please. Unbelievable.

SPEAKER_02 19:22

Anyways. Unbelievable. So back then there was a silver little tin can that you would pour all the oil in and then it would dry up and it was lard. So that was your point that you would re- Oh, and then they would reuse the same oil. They would reuse that turned into lard to cook your next meal.

SPEAKER_03 19:38

Yeah, because we had we had the the it was like a mini deep fryer just for croquetas.

SPEAKER_02 19:43

Croquettes.

SPEAKER_03 19:45

And for other things that I guess, I don't know. Fish sticks. I don't I don't. But they would reuse the oil. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 19:54

It didn't matter. Nowadays people are so concerned, oh my god, is it the same oil?

SPEAKER_03 20:00

Is it expired? It's just oil, man.

SPEAKER_02 20:02

It's just oil at this point.

SPEAKER_03 20:03

We grew up It's gonna cook your food.

SPEAKER_02 20:05

Listen, that oil would have cooked our croquettes, our steak, our eggs. What? My parents steak. Yeah, my parents would use a croquette oil? Yes, they would just my daddy's oil. Oh he if you let me kick it out. You wouldn't deep fry it. You would take a piece of the lard with a knife and then put it on. Why are you looking at me like I'm crazy, dude? You s you've seen my dad.

SPEAKER_03 20:32

When when when you I gotta say that uh it's not far from beyond belief.

SPEAKER_02 20:39

Now you know what my dad's secret was he would get some of the lard from the croquette that dried up, and and sometimes it was already mixed of like three different things that were cooked in it.

SPEAKER_03 20:53

Is that how you got your allergy? Shut up.

unknown 20:59

Anyways.

SPEAKER_03 21:01

Alright. It's crazy. Why does this keep moving around so much?

SPEAKER_02 21:07

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 21:08

It's you. So so yeah, so so Aguila would make croquetas. Grandma will make croquettes. And uh and I would smell them like on my way home, like a block, half a block away, maybe a block away. I'd be like, oh, it's croquetas.

SPEAKER_02 21:24

Croquet time.

SPEAKER_03 21:26

Yeah, yeah. And uh it was a pretty it was, you know, it was good. She wouldn't get, you know. For us, we didn't have like all the little fancy dancy cracker and the lemon and the lime and all that stuff.

SPEAKER_02 21:39

We used to make it for lunch in a sandwich.

SPEAKER_03 21:43

Is that a sandwich with a g?

SPEAKER_02 21:45

Shut up. A sandwich. You meant the people that raised me.

SPEAKER_03 21:49

Yeah, I know. That's why I asked you if it was sandwich with a G. Sandwich. It's a sandwich with a lot of things.

SPEAKER_02 21:54

You saw the people that raised me and who taught me to speak.

SPEAKER_03 21:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:58

One spoke perfect English and the other one.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

You know Theoretical Theoretical English.

SPEAKER_02 22:05

But yeah, we wouldn't have it as lunch, but I love those croquettes. I tried making it one time here.

SPEAKER_03 22:11

No.

SPEAKER_02 22:11

The day I made the oil went down the sink and uh it didn't really work out for me.

SPEAKER_03 22:18

Murdering me.

SPEAKER_02 22:20

What? Okay, if we're gonna talk about food, my favorite part growing up Hispanic was breakfast. There's nothing like having a Cuban bread with butter and um Cuban coffee with milk.

SPEAKER_03 22:39

Hmm. So I remember I remember um my great-grandfather, he would he would make every day and he would boil milk in a pot.

SPEAKER_02 22:52

My grandmother used to do that.

SPEAKER_03 22:53

Yeah, she would boil boil the milk in the pot and then mix it with the coffee.

SPEAKER_02 23:00

Yeah, because they they wouldn't use well, they didn't really have microwaves back then. We didn't have a microwave. Um but even when we did they all had microwave, um the cafe con leche, he would make it in the in the thing.

SPEAKER_03 23:19

In the uh pot the coffee. Oh he would make the coffee in the coffee thing, whatever that thing's called. Like a fetera.

SPEAKER_01 23:27

A coffee maker on the stove.

SPEAKER_03 23:29

Stove coffee maker. And then and then he would boil the the milk. The milk in like this. By it by the way, it was the same pot that he used every single time. It was like a tin pot.

SPEAKER_02 23:41

Oh, my grandmother used to do that too. Yeah, I think it was like a Cuban thing because my grandmother also um even when they had microwaves, they wouldn't use the microwave, they would warm it up. But what I was saying is that I used to love the breakfast because I would get my Cuban toast and dunk it in my Cuban coffee milk. Because I don't know how to translate that differently. It's milk with coffee.

SPEAKER_03 24:10

It's a latte.

SPEAKER_02 24:11

Okay, I guess.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

Believe it or not, that's what it's called.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

Well, anyways, how we dunk it in and whatever. I I used to love those for real. Like, really, really do. I still do, actually. But moving on, I don't know why we're always stuck on food.

SPEAKER_03 24:24

Well, because food, food is uh is is is the soul, right? Like that's uh that's where everything comes through. I think the kitchen, you know, especially a Cuban house.

SPEAKER_02 24:35

In a Cuban house, especially if grandma was if a grandmother was in there.

SPEAKER_03 24:39

All you can do is smell food everywhere. You walked out of the house, you smelled like food, you smelled like so frito. Oh, translate that now.

SPEAKER_02 24:51

Hold on, hold on. I'm gonna get it. Hold on. Uh yeah. Spices.

SPEAKER_03 25:02

Sofrito is like a seasoning.

SPEAKER_02 25:04

Seasoning. That's what I said. I said that it's a seasoning. Yeah, I said that.

SPEAKER_03 25:08

So they were like supernatural men.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

Grandparents, supernatural grandmas. That's their heart for sure.

SPEAKER_03 25:16

Um yep. Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

Well, for me, yes.

SPEAKER_03 25:20

For you, yes. I mean my grandmother was not the same.

SPEAKER_02 25:24

I mean, for me, yeah. I mean, you have some good memories because you were just your grandmother was different from your great grandmother, so yeah. I don't know, cooking-wise and all that, but you got to experience my grandmother's cooking, and when she would come to my mom to my to our house, well, my mom's house. When she would come to my parents' house on the weekend. Yeah because it was religious. A Cuban household? Religious. Every weekend, they would come. That is Milo, who thinks he's a ballerina.

SPEAKER_03 25:56

He is stretching out his back leg.

SPEAKER_02 25:59

He looks like a ballerina. But, anyways, a Cuban household is doing yoga religiously every weekend, and it's always like one house for some reason that everybody meets at.

SPEAKER_03 26:08

Everybody meets at this one house, and and the Awela cooks. Grandma. Grandma, she cooks, and she'll make all kinds of different meals. And and if you're and if you're wise, you will stick around and learn from Awela's cooking. Grandma's cooking, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:26

I never really learned it.

SPEAKER_03 26:27

Because you are a different person.

SPEAKER_02 26:30

No, I just sent you and you got it, so we're good.

SPEAKER_03 26:32

So I learned how to cook from Awela's cooking because she cooked with so much sasong.

SPEAKER_02 26:39

Seasoning.

SPEAKER_03 26:41

Flavor. Flavor. If you're gonna translate, you gotta translate right. She cooked with so much seasoning.

SPEAKER_02 26:48

I was thinking of food, and I just went with what I thought you said.

SPEAKER_03 26:52

So so getting off food, there was always the special cures growing up, because for some reason, Cuban households have all these remedies that I feel like we're in the my big fat Greek wedding now. Yes. Oh, and we're we're we're letting all the secrets out today. So if you ever wanted to learn about the Cuban house, we got you. Vigbabu rux. Vigva Borru. Vicks. Alright, this stuff cured everything.

SPEAKER_02 27:28

The one that comes in the little tin round can thing. Small.

SPEAKER_03 27:33

It revives birds. Does that you know my grandfather used to say you have to have ones that have passed long ago?

SPEAKER_02 27:44

My great grandfather used to say, Oh, you you have a cough, eat a small like a little bit of that VIX, and it'll cure you.

SPEAKER_03 27:55

Which by the way, is literally ingesting menthol.

SPEAKER_02 28:00

Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, yeah. I turned out fine.

SPEAKER_03 28:06

Crazy. So you would put this stuff on your nose, on your chest, on your chest, on your back, you put it on your feet, and then on your feet.

SPEAKER_02 28:17

And I don't know about well, for me, as my as a child, as my mom was rubbing this VIX on my chest because I caught a cold.

SPEAKER_03 28:27

Where did it where did you catch it from?

SPEAKER_02 28:28

Well, that's what I was gonna say. I got a whole lecture, a whole TED Talk lecture on this is why you don't have your hair wet at night. This is why you don't shower and wash your hair late at night and then go to bed. This is the consequence. Or shower and then go outside at night.

SPEAKER_03 28:58

No, no, no. Well, you can't go outside at night because the dreaded.

SPEAKER_02 29:05

I won't be able to translate that.

SPEAKER_03 29:06

What is it called?

SPEAKER_02 29:07

Sereno.

SPEAKER_03 29:08

The truth. The dreaded sereno. Which how would we translate that to so I'm gonna translate it, try I'm gonna try to explain what sedano is. It is a curse. It is a curse that if you go outside and there is a slight bit of dew, you caught the sedano.

SPEAKER_02 29:38

What?

SPEAKER_03 29:39

Sedano is the worst thing that could happen to you if you step outside and it's either slightly chilly or slightly moist. So if the if you if you live in in a in a tropical, subtropical climate, the chances of being caught by the dreaded El Sereno.

SPEAKER_02 30:03

I mean, if you really want to translate it, it just means calm and serene, which is really what it means.

SPEAKER_03 30:11

But what is wrong with you?

SPEAKER_02 30:12

But it listen, Google told me that.

SPEAKER_03 30:15

That is n Google does not know what El Sereno is.

SPEAKER_02 30:19

Because El Sereno comes to the We're so dumb, the two of us laughing at this. Um but yes. Be careful. You were told, well, when when we had our oldest We were constantly warned. We were constantly warned that if we were gonna go out at night from the house door to the car to cover the baby's head.

SPEAKER_03 30:46

Cover the baby's head.

SPEAKER_01 30:48

With a I'm saying this and you know how silly we sound.

SPEAKER_03 30:54

Because you're gonna get El Sereno El Sereno Tonight is the same night that it happens every night. Your pa your grandparents and parents warned you about Cuidado! El Serenos I can't translate it's coming.

SPEAKER_02 31:27

No, it's always there's for real.

SPEAKER_03 31:29

It doesn't matter what day it is. It's always El Sereno. I can't translate horror movie. I can't translate all that. But just so you know that it's it's literally a horror movie.

SPEAKER_02 31:47

But it's for real, and they would tell us that. No, I'm saying it's for real that they would tell us that. Going from our door to the car, cover the baby's head, put a blanket over the whole kid. Like you would think paparazzi was outside. We didn't want them to take a photo of our child.

SPEAKER_03 32:04

And God forbid you go outside and your hair is slightly damp.

SPEAKER_02 32:08

Oh, till this day. I was sick the other day, and my mom's like, Did you go outside with your hair wet? You had got you got it, Sereno. You got it from being outside. You you took a shower late. Well, one of our friends. No, her mom tells her don't bathe the girls late and wash their hair. No, they're gonna get sick. Just like they tell you don't walk barefoot.

SPEAKER_03 32:33

It's coming.

SPEAKER_02 32:36

Stop it. El Sereno. Anyways. Anyways, I'm not even gonna go with that anymore. What was that about what don't walk barefoot? Yeah, you're gonna get sick if you walk barefoot.

SPEAKER_03 32:50

You shouldn't walk barefoot because the floor is dirty.

SPEAKER_02 32:52

Well, no, they used to say make sure you put on socks or shoes because or sat uh slippers because you're gonna get sick.

SPEAKER_03 33:00

The cold goes from the floor through your cold, El Sereno will climb up through the floor.

SPEAKER_02 33:07

That's why they would put VIX on your feet, because it starts there.

SPEAKER_03 33:10

El Sereno gets you there.

SPEAKER_02 33:12

No, man, not a Sereno. The Sereno gets you on your head.

SPEAKER_01 33:28

Why are we doing this?

SPEAKER_03 33:30

Because there's nothing that can prepare you. What? Okay. It's coming for you.

SPEAKER_02 33:42

I'm gonna pat I'm gonna move on from this. Moving on.

SPEAKER_03 33:45

If you don't put on a hoodie, maybe that's why all the kids wear hoodies.

SPEAKER_02 33:49

Well, I wasn't allowed to leave the house without a sweater.

SPEAKER_03 33:51

They were warned about it.

SPEAKER_02 33:52

We live in freaking Florida. What the heck do I need a sweater for?

SPEAKER_03 33:56

Bird Sereno. Obviously.

SPEAKER_02 33:58

That was at night.

SPEAKER_03 33:59

Obviously. You never know where you're gonna be at night. You could be out there. Sereno could come and catch you. Stop it.

SPEAKER_02 34:10

Irene.

SPEAKER_04 34:11

Oh god, that was so good.

SPEAKER_02 34:13

I mean I don't remember ever telling our kids that. Did we ever tell our kids that?

SPEAKER_01 34:18

I swear, the day I am a grandmother, if you hear those words come out of me to one of our kids. I can't wait.

SPEAKER_03 34:25

It's gonna be so good.

SPEAKER_01 34:26

Just throw me out to a sereno because it's gonna be so I'm gonna be the one that does it.

SPEAKER_03 34:30

I'm gonna be like, oh, what are you doing? Okay, so I'm gonna and I'm gonna do it in an accent, and I don't even have an accent.

SPEAKER_02 34:36

Yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_03 34:37

I'm gonna go. Where are you going? You can't go outside. Because El Sereno is gonna catch you. I can't even do it without laughing.

SPEAKER_02 34:47

No, but for real, for real. Like for real, for real. Growing up, whenever I heard that, like I would follow directions. Like, I'm not gonna wet my hair at night. I'm not stepping foot outside. I felt like that movie The Fog. Like if That's what that's a different if I stepped outside, what's gonna get it?

SPEAKER_03 35:10

It's the fog, it's the mist.

SPEAKER_02 35:11

No, it's not a mist. It comes from the Don't laugh at me now.

SPEAKER_03 35:16

What?

SPEAKER_02 35:16

Because I got the explanation as a child. Wait, don't laugh at me.

SPEAKER_03 35:21

Who explained it to you?

SPEAKER_02 35:22

My father.

SPEAKER_03 35:23

Oh don't laugh. This is not accurate.

SPEAKER_02 35:26

Don't laugh.

SPEAKER_03 35:26

And my grandparents they vouched. I I did the they they Okay.

SPEAKER_02 35:33

In my understanding when I was a child and I was explained, because I was like, what's coming to get me? You was explained when it was outside at night from the moon.

SPEAKER_03 35:44

What? What?

SPEAKER_01 35:48

Well, it's at night. The Sereno comes from the moon. What? I can't. I give up. I don't believe my whole childhood was a lie.

SPEAKER_03 36:01

The sereno comes from the moon. It attacks you when you least expect it. It is El Sereno. The most dangerous thing in the world. Forget it. Forget anything else, right? Forget the boogeyman.

SPEAKER_02 36:20

Nope.

SPEAKER_03 36:21

Forget all that stuff. It's La Chancleta and it's Ed Sereno. Those are the most dangerous things in the universe in the achievement household.

SPEAKER_02 36:30

I had to. I looked it up. What does Sereno mean in Latin? Clear, calm.

SPEAKER_01 36:35

I've been lied to my whole life.

SPEAKER_03 36:37

That's exactly it. Oh man, I can't wait for my buddy to hear this. Because he's always talking about a sereno and how it's gonna get you.

SPEAKER_02 36:44

It's peacefulness and serenity. What in the world? Why are we lying to our children?

SPEAKER_03 36:52

Well, it's the same reason when you lie to them and say. That is Sereno will get you.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

Yeah, we'll stick to that. How about that? Don't say anything else.

SPEAKER_03 37:07

I don't know. So dangerous.

SPEAKER_02 37:09

I'm now I'm in a whole rabbit. I I've fallen into a rabbit hole about this. Okay. We're moving on because we're sounding more and more silly now. The more we talk about it, okay.

SPEAKER_03 37:24

Who sounds silly? We do. That you are Googling.

SPEAKER_02 37:27

Yes, I just Googled it, guys. I really, really did.

SPEAKER_03 37:30

El Sereno. The most calm you've ever had. It attacks you when you least expect it.

SPEAKER_02 37:39

So for instance, I like well, I like showering now at night, like right before I go to bed. That was not allowed when I was a child, when I was younger. Because I would get sick, apparently. I don't remember ever getting sick, but I would get sick. Of course. And if I got sick, that of course makes the most sense. And if I got sick, it wasn't because somebody at school was sick or somebody in my house w was sick. It was because I must have showered and wet my hair or gone outside. Oh, God forbid. So, okay, okay. Stop. That's it. We're done with that. Oh my god, I can't. Every Cuban household had the Cuban coffee.

SPEAKER_03 38:20

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 38:21

Like it was like Cuban coffee time. Who wants coffee? And everybody was like, hello.

SPEAKER_03 38:26

You know, it's kind of like um, it's kind of like uh our friends across the pond in Britain that do tea time.

SPEAKER_02 38:31

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 38:32

Except we do cafecito time. Coffee time, yeah. That's what I said. Cafecito time.

SPEAKER_02 38:38

Coffee time.

SPEAKER_03 38:39

Is that that's what I said. It's Cuban coffee time, not American coffee time. Thank you. Thank you. Um which, you know, happens at any given point. It's not like two, oh, it's two o'clock, it's tea time.

SPEAKER_02 38:52

And what's up, what's up with the grandparents? Well, it's always grandmothers. Notice we don't really mention grandfathers that much, but grandmothers. What's up with them standing in the darkness in the kitchen at four in the morning making coffee? Like we're in a haunted show.

SPEAKER_03 39:09

They have a different time than we do. No, I swear Cuban grandparents don't sleep. They are on a different time. They don't sleep.

SPEAKER_02 39:17

Because they're watching off for the Sereno.

SPEAKER_03 39:19

Of course, they have to make sure that the Sereno doesn't creep in. Um No, but seriously. I I don't think they ever slept. As long as I was awake, they were awake. Always. Even when they would retire, Boyaretirad. That's what they would say, right? When they said they would they would boyaretirad. You know, and that means they're going to their room. They were still not asleep because Sawalo Gigante was on.

SPEAKER_02 39:48

Oh my god, yeah. But it just never made sense why at four in the morning they're standing in the darkness in the kitchen making coffee for great. For Christ's sake, turn on the light. On vacation, my grandmother scared the crap out of me.

SPEAKER_03 40:03

Because then they're wasting electricity.

SPEAKER_02 40:05

That was one of the biggest crap out of me, man.

SPEAKER_03 40:08

Listen, electricity was not a common thing in Cuba, I guess, in the Middle Ages. In the middle 20th century, or the early 20th century, right?

SPEAKER_02 40:22

Yes. Now, before because we're almost coming to the end, because we took way too much time with Sereno. Um what are you talking about? Sereno is a scary thing. I did not experience this as a child, but I know you probably have, because I know you, and some other people. The chancleta.

SPEAKER_03 40:44

Oh, I got hit a lot.

SPEAKER_02 40:46

You didn't translate for me, what the heck?

SPEAKER_03 40:48

Oh. The slipper.

SPEAKER_02 40:52

Now when you translate it, doesn't it sound sillier?

SPEAKER_03 40:55

The slipper. It doesn't sound violent. Like it was. That's when the slipper it was violent.

SPEAKER_02 41:02

Would come flying at you.

SPEAKER_03 41:04

The changleta. See, you hear it, you hear the word, right? La changla. La chancleta. The slipper. Violet. It's a violent word, man. It sounds violent. Like say it. Chancleta.

SPEAKER_02 41:19

And then you say slipper.

SPEAKER_03 41:21

Some some cultures say chunkla.

SPEAKER_02 41:23

Yeah, yeah. Like, well, whatever. You could have been thinking of doing something wrong, and all of a sudden that slipper, that chancla came flying at you.

SPEAKER_03 41:31

Dude, it came in before you walked in the room. Yeah. It was already in there.

SPEAKER_02 41:35

And I want to say that is used in a lot of Hispanic backgrounds. Yeah. Um, I didn't have that growing up. We were just grounded and that was it. Um, but I've heard of it. But I didn't want to not mention it because, you know, um then people say we didn't mention it, and and we did. Now we did. Now we did.

SPEAKER_03 41:59

We did. We did. So how about we do a cut chow for Cuban American trauma?

SPEAKER_02 42:14

Okay. So why don't we title it? Did this happen to you?

SPEAKER_03 42:23

Did this happen to you? Blah blah blah bum. Alright.

SPEAKER_02 42:29

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 42:30

Did it?

SPEAKER_02 42:31

Okay, go ahead. Go go with the first one.

SPEAKER_03 42:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 42:34

What's the first question? I mean, first I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 42:38

How many times were you compared to a cousin who somehow became a doctor at the age of 12? My whole life. Always.

SPEAKER_02 42:46

Listen, till this day, till this day. I don't even know why my parents gave me a name. Because I'm never caught by my name. The last thing I'll be caught is my name. Anyways, how about hearing tenemos comida en la casa? Which means do we have food at home?

SPEAKER_03 43:08

No, we have food at home.

SPEAKER_02 43:10

Oh, sorry. We have food at home. How many times did you ever hear that? Well, no, why am I asking you that?

SPEAKER_03 43:16

Yeah, exactly. Go ahead and ask me. I should have asked you.

SPEAKER_02 43:18

Go ahead and ask me.

SPEAKER_03 43:19

How many times did you hear Noy McDona? I tenemos comida in la casa.

SPEAKER_02 43:25

Every day.

SPEAKER_03 43:26

Right, which means there's no McDonald's. We got food in the house.

SPEAKER_02 43:34

Um, how about well, we we raised our kids Cuban, so we've said this before. Parents acting like wasting rice is a federal offense.

SPEAKER_03 43:44

Because it is.

SPEAKER_02 43:45

There's a lot of people out there, man.

SPEAKER_03 43:47

Here's another thing now that you said rice.

SPEAKER_04 43:52

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 43:55

Yeah. It's rice and eggs, guys. Rice and eggs. Fried eggs. Alright. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 44:02

Loud family arguments that magically disappear ten minutes later.

SPEAKER_03 44:07

Because you think it's an argument.

SPEAKER_02 44:09

But they're just talking.

SPEAKER_03 44:10

But they're just talking. They're excited. You know, that's that's the whole thing in a Cuban in a Cuban house. Everybody has the volume. It's never eight or nine or ten. It's eleven, it's twelve, and it's thirteen.

SPEAKER_02 44:26

But then, but then, imagine that's just talking. Now, and when the Cuban family have a dramatic argument, it's worthy of an HBO.

SPEAKER_03 44:38

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 44:39

And then five minutes later they're like, hey, do you want flang?

SPEAKER_03 44:42

Pretty much. And cafecito.

SPEAKER_02 44:44

Of course. You know.

SPEAKER_03 44:45

Because that's the way you're supposed to do it.

SPEAKER_02 44:47

You end every meal like that. A dessert. Always a Hispanic dessert. Most of the time it's flang because hello, we're Hispanic. And a Cuban coffee.

SPEAKER_03 44:58

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 44:58

Now we've become a little more Americanized and we do American coffee.

SPEAKER_03 45:02

The American and Cuban American has really taken over. But what was here's here's another thing. Here's a question for you before we wrap this up.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 45:12

What was the most Cuban thing your family did growing up?

SPEAKER_02 45:18

Um play dominoes, get together every weekend, and be loud, in all honesty. It was mostly like playing dominoes and cooking grandma cooking in the kitchen. My family used to get together at my house. So that was always cool.

SPEAKER_03 45:41

It's beautiful.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

Yes. And if you're not Cuban, what's the oddly specific thing your culture did that made no sense until adulthood? So you guys think of that and let us know. I was gonna ask you the same question, but we all know your answer. You could only well, you know what? You could still answer. I mean, we've been together a long time since high school.

SPEAKER_03 46:08

I can tell you that that uh growing up, the most Cuban thing we ever did was um visitas. We would go we would go to people's houses because my my group my great grandparents liked visiting their their cousins, which ended up being my cousins, yeah, somehow somewhere yeah, um and we all kind of grew up together, me and my cousins. Um so we would do that, and then they would have like I don't know, I guess it was the food and the and the cafecitos. Because even even as a as a child, you grow up with cafecitos. Always and uh like you drink your little coffee, you drink your cafe con lecha at night.

SPEAKER_02 46:55

Yeah, and something else that for me as a Cuban household and a Cuban family, every summer we did a two-week, a week to two week vacation in the Florida Keys with the whole entire family. I'm talking about my parents' cousins and cousins, and it was like a whole thing every year, same place, same time, came to a point where we knew the owners of the hotel, because it wasn't like a hotel, I guess. It was like a you know, whatever you call those places there. Motel, right? Motel in. A motel in, but not outside in a sereno.

SPEAKER_03 47:33

Definitely not in a sereno.

SPEAKER_02 47:36

But, anyways, we've gone on and on about this.

SPEAKER_03 47:39

We we might make this another parter at some point.

SPEAKER_02 47:41

Maybe we'll do a whole episode on just Sereno.

SPEAKER_03 47:44

El Sereno. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 47:47

Oh, there's Milo. Milo. Anyways, all right, guys. Well, it was amazing talking to you all again.

SPEAKER_03 47:55

Thank you for letting us share our culture with you.

SPEAKER_02 47:57

And thank you for listening.

SPEAKER_03 47:59

We appreciate you.

SPEAKER_02 48:00

And I hope we made you laugh. And don't forget, drink some Cuban coffee if you've never had it. Give it a try. Find a Cuban friend, and you'd be amazed. Some American friends may know how to do it. But find yourself a Cuban friend. I know. Find a friend and make yourself a Cuban coffee. And remember, follow us, subscribe.

SPEAKER_03 48:25

At Limitless Couple305.

SPEAKER_02 48:28

And share us with your friends. Don't be selfish.

SPEAKER_03 48:32

Period.