4: The Truth About Life After College (Howard, Fraternities & Chasing Your Passion) | Miles Thomas

Artist, Omega, Entrepreneur. In this episode, I sit down with my guy Miles Thomas. We talk about everything from throwing parties at Howard to navigating life after college.

We dive into the origin of Rebel Events, how it started with a party that actually lost money, and how the brand has grown into a post-grad nightlife movement. We also get into the business side of promotions, the importance of optics, and the mistakes people make when trying to collaborate.

We talk everything from party promotion, being an independent artist, greek life, Howard University and much more.

If you're figuring out life after college, building something of your own, or trying to stay true to yourself while chasing success, this conversation is for you.

00:00 – The First Rebel Events Party (And Losing Money)
02:20 – How Rebel Events Survived After Graduation
05:09 – Early Business Mistakes Running Party Promotions
09:24 – Why Small Teams Work Better Than Big Groups
11:55 – Transitioning Rebel Events From College to Post-Grad
14:44 – The Power of “Optics” in Nightlife & Promotion
16:39 – Why MulesChose Howard University
20:56 – Post-Grad Reality: Passion vs Corporate Career
26:30 – The Truth About the Content & Music Industry
29:25 – Why Most Creators Quit
37:08 – Jerry Springer & The Trap of Viral Content
43:41 – The Story Behind His Song “Long Distance”
48:25 – The Truth About Long Distance Relationships
56:26 – Advice for Entrepreneurs Balancing Passion & Career
1:00:37 – One Decision That Completely Changed His Life
1:10:15 – Real Talk About Fraternities & Identity After College
1:22:54 – The Truth About Greek Life  at Howard
1:32:20 – Final Advice

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Alright bro, we roll it. Appreciate having me. Of course, brother. Of course, man. So I want to start off by asking you, bro, like, what is your favorite Howard memory?

SPEAKER_04 0:11

My favorite Howard memory. My favorite Howard memory would probably be freshman year. Some friends and I started this party group called Rebel Events. And it was the first semester. We had all just become friends. And um it was it was right before Thanksgiving break, I believe. And the party was so fun. Uh all of our peers came out. We even had a couple sophomores there that came to the to the function. Okay. And it was the start to our promo group, our event organization called Rebel Events. It just took it off. And the funny part about it was we didn't make any money. We actually lost money. We lost money on it because we didn't know what we were doing. Like we wanted people to show up. So at first, tickets were like five dollars and girls were free. And then after like a week into the party, we raised them to like $10. And then I think girls were still free. And then we're like, we'll just charge the door. And then so what ended up happening was we paid for this huge Airbnb out in Bethesda. And um it ended up being more packed than we thought it would. And the B was so expensive that we didn't cover it. And then also we spent money on liquor. And then the function was going so well that nobody was at the door after like midnight. You know, like you throw a party, everyone's on a porch trying to look like they're running stuff, like all scan tickets, I'll pat people down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I'll I'll tell people where to park. You know what I mean? Everybody wants to roll. Everybody wants to be a yeah. Everybody wants to be like man character. And then after like 12, it got to be so live that half of us was inside the function, the other half was outside. And then they didn't care anymore. And the sad part about it was that if we had stayed out there and just been more diligent from 12 to 2, we would have made probably triple the amount of money that we made from 10 to 12 because that was prime time. Yeah. People start posting videos and pictures and people start calling it Ubers. But um that even though we didn't make any bread, we learned a lot. It was a first function, it was a staple memory, and um it really set tone for our reputation and allowed us to be successful throughout the rest of the time we were at school.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Absolutely, man. Like that was actually one of the things I wanted to touch on uh for this conversation was rubble events. And I wanted to ask you, like, that was 2018 or 2019-ish, right? So, and it's 2026 and it's still going on. So I wanted to ask you, like, how were you able to continue that longevity going?

SPEAKER_04 2:37

It's a good question. And it's something that we've had to learn along the way. Um, you know, short answer is lineage. So, you know, you and I both did Gentleman and Drew Social Club, you know, so that's how we uh, you know, met and started off freshman year. Uh our senior year with Rebel Events, we had our younger uh GOD line come in and we basically mentored them and coached them up on how to maintain the organization. You know, so our we were throwing parties with them, we'd be at the door, tell them how to, you know, push tickets, how to maintain the security of the place, because we had already made a lot of mistakes along the way. Yeah. So we wanted to show them how to maintain the organization without making the same mistakes that we did and uh maintain the reputation that we had built up. And luckily enough for us, you know, with our some of it is luck, some of it is intention. We had a good group of guys come through and they end up taking it off to the next level. So um they were able to maintain the undergrad reputation. And since we were older, we were like, all right, what we'll do as the postgraduates, you know, with jobs and dealing with life, we'll come back for homecoming or graduation and have events that are uh catered to our age group. Yeah. That way we can start um, I guess you could say, soft launching the rebel alum events because what we didn't want to happen was we didn't want it to it to be a only undergrad type of event. We want to start moving into nightlife and also even pop up in other cities around the country because we all end up dispersing once we graduated. Yeah. So um where we're at now is even the younger guys that we brought in, they're graduates as well. So we have a good reputation for throwing post-grad homecoming moves. We also uh pop up in different cities here and there. And so long-winded answer, but to land the plane here, the way we're able to maintain it and keep it going is by uh passing it down so they can uh continue to build. And then we also put the organization in place to mature while we matured. So we no longer are known as throwing undergrad moves. We actually have an event tonight and it will be post-grad people there. It won't just be like, um, I mean it's spring break anyway, so I don't even think that undergrad people would catch wind, but um it basically was able to grow along with us and mature with us because we moved with intention and and it involved some younger guys once we stepped off the scene.

SPEAKER_00 4:56

Okay. And then I know you talked about early on, like in Bethesda, that um, you know, you guys could have made triple the amount of money, but like what other mistakes did you uh make along the way so that you know passed on to the younger guys?

SPEAKER_04 5:10

Other mistakes we made along the way was I would say we tried to include everybody because we wanted to be social and we also wanted to include everybody in terms of like rebels or everybody in terms of like what do you mean by so for instance our friend group or I guess you could say even our GOD line, without getting too deep into it, it it's like 16 of us. So we all were friends and some of, you know, and when there's 16 people hanging out, uh uh naturally enough, some of them are gonna click up. You know what I mean? So um when it came to hosting Rebels, which is a completely separate entity than the organization that we all met each other in, um, we initially we were like, okay, this is all of ours, right? But everybody didn't want to throw up party organization, everybody didn't want to be known as a promo person, everybody didn't want to, you know, it's not that like anybody was against it, but no one had the same everyone didn't have the same level of enthusiasm. Yeah. So what ended up happening was about five of us ended up being the spearheads and being on the committee. And the way I said that we try to include everybody, we wanted it to make it seem like, okay, we all are gonna pitch in and all ha have a part into it. And something that we did was we used to wait for everyone to vote on stuff, or we used to wait for everyone to chime in, or we used to try and split everything up amongst everyone. And you have to realize sometimes that you just gotta do it. You know, if you ever have a group chat, you guys are trying to have a trip, it everyone's not getting a ticket at the same time. One person has to be the first person to buy the ticket, and then the next person will get it, and then FOMO will accumulate, and then everyone will be on board. And that's kind of how the party stuff went. We all said we just gonna do it, y'all can show up and post, and and that'll be that. And um, another sector to trying to include everyone, it wasn't just internal, there were other party groups that were on campus as well at the time because a new one pops up every semester. Yeah. You know what I mean? So um we we I wouldn't say that we didn't have confidence, but sometimes we thought it would be smarter to collab than to compete. And so there were times where we throw a party with a group of people, agree on a certain pay split, like, okay, we'll go 50-50 on this. And then we ended up throwing a function and we didn't need them. You know, it's like so it's like, okay, we we did, we have this reputation, you guys have a nice reputation, but everyone who's showing up is calling it the rebel party. Everyone who bought tickets bought it from our link. Like, we didn't need to give y'all half of what we were doing just because we both were on the function. And so, um and then also, you know, you never know how people are until money gets involved or business gets involved. You could be my friend, we could be cool, or you could be, you could be my associate. You could be my classmate, we could be cool, we could have never gotten sideways before. But now, when it's time to do a group project, now I'm gonna know what type of effort you actually put into stuff. Yeah, I'm gonna know how you act with money, I'm gonna know how you do move. There were some people that we work with that stole from us or lied about numbers or um sold tickets on the side and didn't tell us, or were we take cash at the door and they're pocketing it. So, you know, it it you can't trust everyone. So when you collaborate, you um and if you're really the the spearhead or you're really the main source of emotion, when you collaborate, you have more to lose than the people who are on with you. Like we put some people on. There's some people who didn't have any um traction at the time, and then they threw some stuff with us, and then threw a party the next week, and it's like, oh, they threw that party with them, and it's like, well, if they hadn't, you wouldn't have even blinked at their page, you know what I mean? So, but you live and you learn, you know?

SPEAKER_00 8:30

You do live and you learn. And you know, one thing that you said that resonated with me was when you said you were trying to include everybody. Because so for F-Squad, how we started, we started with eight of us uh back in 2017, and we ran into that same problem where it was like, all right, we all gonna vote on this and trying to get eight people together, and you guys were trying to get 16, so I can only imagine how much harder it was. But like, it just was damn near like impossible. And then shout out Zahir for you know carrying a lot of the workload in terms of you know the flyers and stuff like that, and then we just came to a point where it was like some people are just literally just like showing up, which is I mean, you need people to like you know show up and work door and stuff like that, but like it got to a point where it was like, bro, like you know, we went and got the venue and then made the flyer and did all this other shit, and then we're gonna sit around and then you didn't do anything, we're gonna give you a vote. Yeah, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 9:24

And that's like and that's what we learned was everyone has a role to play. Yeah. And so when it comes to us, you know, it's you got CJ, Jassiri, Kingsley, Timmy, and I. And we all are, we all are very like-minded individuals, but some of us are better things than others. And some of us are um, you know, have more ambitions for certain areas than others. So for instance, Ike and I, we both do graphic design. Kingsley, I can say, Kingsley's is Ike also for those who don't know. Uh he's miles ahead of me when it comes to this graphic design stuff. You know what I mean? So if we will work together on a flyer, and it's like, okay, that's we're gonna go with our intuition on the flyer. Then you got CJ, who is the money man. It's like, okay, you're gonna, you're gonna work on, uh, you're gonna look at how much the budget is gonna be, how much we're spending on X, Y, and Z. And then you got uh Timmy, who is a huge social guy, right? And then you got just Siri, who is just a facilitator and like a chaperone. He wants to make sure everyone's staying focused. He's really like a chaperon. Really, he's like our chaperone. Like if Siri's not there, something bad might happen. And instead of taking accountability for what we did wrong, I'm gonna blame Siri for not being there because we knew that if he was there, then that wouldn't have happened. You would have talked somebody off the ledge, or you would have de-escalated the situation, or you would, or maybe they wouldn't have tried us because Siri's like 6'5. Yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 10:44

No, it's multiple, everyone has strengths, you know what I mean? And when I and and it's important to say it's like, bro, you can just show up and just be there.

SPEAKER_04 10:51

You can just be there, bro. Like, you be there, and maybe your presence is enough for people to be like, all right, I'm not gonna show my ass to that. That's funny as fuck. And you know, a lot of those, a lot of talents that we have are, you know, intertwined. Like it it it there are times where some of us were dealing with life, we're dealing with school, we picked up the slack. So if CJ's going through something, we all know how to manage money as well. He's probably, you know, the most keen with it, but we could do that too. And you know, or if uh if Timmy and I are, you know, we we're the cues. So there was times where we had to go um missing for a little bit and the other guys picked up the slack. You know what I mean? So it's like uh that's why I feel like smaller numbers, I wouldn't say smaller numbers are better, but once you have your community and it's tight knit, you don't need to invite or include a whole bunch of other people because um everyone has their role. And you know, once people get situated into their roles, you can actually throw off the chemistry by including more people and it can be uh more harmful than it is beneficial.

SPEAKER_00 11:44

Mm-hmm. And then now that you guys are moving towards rebels alum, like how does that transition look from undergrad to like now postgrad?

SPEAKER_04 11:54

Like it's it's we're learning. Um right now, the our strongest event or time of the year is homecoming, just because we've thrown homecoming consistently over the past few years, and um we know everyone's gonna be in town for that time period. Uh what we're trying to do is navigate to being able to throw things in different cities. There are other party groups that do it so well. Um, and and I'll even give them credit. Like Sold Out Dates does a good job at popping up around the place. Um it's interesting, blank locations, they are on our GO line as well. It's Kim, Alex, and then Emil. He's not GO, but he's also a part of the friend group. And Dylan 2. Dylan 2, yeah, uh Dylan as well. Um they all they do a good job at popping up places and having events. They just did some stuff in um, and I think it was uh Atlanta, and they had some stuff in Chicago last year. Oh, yeah, I do remember. Like, and I think they popped out in Miami too. They do a good job. And um, what I've come to realize is um sometimes it takes optics to get something started. And what I mean by that is that we threw parties on Howard's campus. We had great optics, but it wasn't about that. We threw those parties from scratch. We had the we got the venue ourselves, we promoted ourselves. We got promo girls who say, look, y'all 20 girls have motion on the gram. Niggas will go anywhere y'all go, y'all look good. We're gonna put you on some rebel t-shirts and we're gonna have y'all promote and y'all can get in free and come in the pregame. And they're like, okay, cool, that's fine. Like, and they were like our promo girls. And then, you know, we built it up from scratch. Now, when you have a place or when you try to go to a location where you don't have the same reputation or you don't have the same amount of pool, sometimes you have to pull up and you have to make it seem like you did that. Or you have to you have to get in where you fit in. We'll we'll get like if we go to Rose Bar on Thursday, they'll pay us a percentage of the bar. But if we pop out somewhere in Dallas and they don't know who we are, they'll they'll say, Look, y'all can promote and we might give y'all a free section. And we'll well, we'll give y'all a section with one comp bottle. And then we'll take it. That way we're on a flyer, we are doing a collab post with the bar. We're showing up, we got the section, we got the motion. And then when you look at our gram or you look at our resume, you can say, Oh, they they did that Dallas event. So the next event they do in Dallas should probably be live because they were they just did that last one. Little did the consumer know that event was going to be jumping whether we were there or not. You know what I mean? And so um, what I think is what we're trying to do is not necessarily just stunt and make it seem like we're doing stuff that we're not doing, but we're trying to build reputations in different cities. And sometimes you have to start off as a little man. Like sometimes we have to be that group that it wouldn't benefit them to collab with us so that we can get put on the same way we put other people on, we trying to get put on in others in other places. So um that's that's kind of where it's headed right now, and it's looking really good.

SPEAKER_00 14:44

Yeah, that's funny that you talk about optics, man. Like the party scene, that's pretty much all it is. Yeah, it's really just optics. Like, even the way like like people be taking like pictures and videos, like all of that shit is optics, bro.

SPEAKER_04 14:58

And if you don't, and if you're not uh an organizer or you're not someone that does it before, you might people can't tell the difference. Partially they don't care. Another thing is they don't they can't tell the difference. Like if if we if uh if we go L Ray, granted it's shut down right now, but L Ray is the most jumping spot on U Street every single Friday. There are businesses on U Street that are that owe L Ray a thank you because they are the pregame to L Ray. If L Ray is not open, some people will not go to U Street. So Pure or, you know, even Salazar over on 14th, like places people go to other places and then go to L Ray. So with that being said, if I'm a consumer and I don't know that or I'm not paying attention to that, and you know, F-Squad or Rebels throw something at L Ray and it's the best thing since sliced bread, it those are optics. L Ray was going to be jumping that night. But you're gonna look back on it and be like, man, that that rebel party was jumping, that F-Squad jump shot was jumping, I'm going to the next jump. So yeah, optics are important because people are just worried about having fun and enjoying themselves. They don't look into the business side of it, they don't look at the layers of things, they're not so critical. And it and it and it and it works both ways. I could throw a function somewhere and the pipe could burst in that event, and then it shuts down and closes early, or you know, maybe um something could go wrong that's out of my control at that place. It's gonna fall on me though. So if something goes well and it's might not I might not be responsible for how well it went, it's still gonna fall on me. You know what I mean? So it's a gamble regardless when it comes to how people perceive their experience at these places.

SPEAKER_00 16:39

So, like, let's pivot towards like, you know, outside of parties, like at Howard. Like, can you explain to me like what made you choose Howard? Like how'd you how'd you end up at Howard?

SPEAKER_04 16:48

Yeah, absolutely. So both my parents are first generation college students. Okay. Um, so they made it very important to my older sister and I growing up that college was not a choice. It was something that we're going to do.

SPEAKER_01 17:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 17:01

And so I thank them very much for being heavily involved in raising us and being so diligent and intentional with our education because I had some peers who were not even thinking about it. And um, you know, everyone has different paths in life, but you know, I'm thankful that I had parents who took education seriously because not everybody in my family did. And uh with that being said, my mom went to Gramlin State University. Okay. So she and she also is a Black Panther, too. She's a huge advocate on HBCUs, uh black history, black unity, and just overall uh black empowerment. And so she educated us on HBCUs at a young age as well. With that being said, my sister's two years older than I am. She got accepted into a variety of schools, but the ones that I visited with her when I was 16 and she was 18, or I was 15, she was 17, looking at schools, the first one we visited was Howard. So I went to her accepting Students Day. For those who don't know, accepting Students Day is usually April every year. Um, and it's when the students who have accepted to go into Howard in the fall or earlier in that year come and experience Howard, and parents can come and look at dorms. And it's just a it's a it's a visit, but it's a it's a visit for everyone to come in. Um it's an intentional visit. It's not a random weekend. Like they do tours, there's parties and all of that going on.

SPEAKER_00 18:21

Yeah, that was my freshman year then. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:24

So that was jumping. I ain't gonna lie. I it was jumping. So her acceptance students' day in 2015 or 16, uh, I think it was 16 or 15 actually. Um, I went and I got to, it was my first time visiting DC, and Howard was my first real college tour. And she's in the meetings talking about the dorms and financial aid. I sneak off and get on the yard. And so the Reds had just had a probate uh the weekend before that, and um I saw it, it was everybody knows how Howard looks in the spring. It's Greek down. You know what I mean? I got to see all the Greek life, I got to see uh all the beautiful women on the yard. I got to see all the people hanging out, just it's dudes freestyling by the benches, it's some people dancing in the grass, it's it's uh picnics going on on the yard. It just looked like I needed to be there, and uh, I was so wide-eyed. And um, and so when uh my dad was looking for me, I was hanging out by the cues. My dad's a my dad's a Q, and and you know, I am as well, and I'm like, Dad, you gotta meet the bros. And he was like, How you gonna tell me to come meet the bros? So I come over there and I'm hanging out with the Qs, and they was like, Yeah, man, make sure you pull up. Uh, this is gonna be jumping. And so at that point, I knew for a fact I was going to Howard because it just felt I felt at home. And um, my sister ended up going to Spellman because she she uh she felt a little overstimulated. It was more catered to her personality to go to Spellman. And um, so that was her choice. But I only applied for Howard and Morehouse. And I applied for Morehouse because my sister was at Spellman. My dad wanted me to apply there. But I got into both, but Howard gave me some money, so I didn't even have to beg or plea with them. Yeah, I was able to go to Howard. But that's me, that's what made me want to go here was her visit.

SPEAKER_00 20:03

Hey man, I'm trying to tell you, like, screen time at Howard is like I don't even know how to describe it. It's like it's not even like a real place. It's like it's like a wonderland, bro. Like Howard's not real at all. Yeah, like wonderful. Yeah, it's it's wonderful. Great memories, bro. Like, if I had to try and convince somebody to like, like a high school student to go to Howard, I would definitely tell them to pull up in the spring. Yeah. Like, you just gotta do it.

SPEAKER_04 20:28

I got friends from back home. Their favorite time to slide is grad weekend. Oh, yeah, that too. Because they came, they came to my grad weekend, and then um, you know, I showed up to grad week a couple year a couple times after, uh, because you know, some of my peers were graduating, and that's their favorite time to come is in May, because grad weekend is is live. They also come to Springfest too. Um, but yeah, the spring in Howard is is a good time. Darty season, lovely.

SPEAKER_00 20:51

Absolutely. So what do you do now, man? Now that you're post-grad, like what's life look like now?

SPEAKER_04 20:56

Life for me right now is really interesting. So when we were talking about how Howard is in a real place, um, I'm kind of I'm dealing with that right now that I've graduated. With that being said, at Howard, you know, I did the parties, I did the grief stuff, but one of the main things that I started doing when I was in school was rapping. I make music. Um, and you know, I I performed at Springfest, opened up for, you know, G Herbo, Moneybag Yo, Capella Gray. I've done shows in DC with Sexy Red, Ruby Rose. Like I I actually felt like I was a real artist when I was in school. And I maintained and built up a reputation of being an artist while I was in school. And people looked at me like an artist. I didn't have to beg for attention. Uh and I feel like if you're good at what you do and you put products out or you put out something for people to engage with, then at Howard they're going to do so. I didn't ha like people knew my songs and I didn't have to beg them to listen to. You could be a a barber at Howard and actually pay um all your bills by by cutting hair because uh it's just so many people right there in that niche. You could Uh start a clothing line. Shout out Malcolm. He started Gratitude Chicago at Howard and now it's in Foot Locker and uh Georgetown and Howard's uh bookstore. You could do so many things that are built around entrepreneurship in school and it will take off and be so much more sustainable than it is in the real world. And to land the plane here, what I'm dealing with now is as a you know, I graduated in in in summer of 22. I'm coming up on four years out of school now. Is do I want to continue to pursue this entrepreneurship or do I want to deal with the realities of being a 25-year-old postgraduate and trying to start their career? You know what I mean? So uh for me, I still make music on the side, but I also work. Um I'm also studying to get into law school. I just took my L set last month. So I might be going back to school this fall, if not next fall at the latest. Um, so but I've also been trying to figure out, you know, what career path makes the most sense for me because my passion is music. But you know, you never want to be that person that's chasing a pipe dream or, you know, trying to stay down to you come up. Being entrepreneur is hard. You know what I mean? Like especially when you go from being so successful at it in this not fake ecosystem, but this uh You don't want to peak in college, basically. Yeah, you don't want to peak in college, exactly. You don't want to peak in college, and you also don't want to sell yourself short and not get ahead of your career because the way the economy is right now, you can't sit around and wait for something to happen. Suck now. You gotta get in where you fit in and get it started. You gotta build your resume. You know, you fresh out of school, people want to that's when people want to hire you the most. That is when entry-level jobs are the most excited to bring you on board. So I did start my career uh when I first got out of school as a uh mortgage loan officer. So I was helping uh veterans uh with debt consolidation by using equity in their homes, getting cash out, paying off credit cards, personal loans, car loans, student loans, XYZ. So I did I did the real thing. I'm doing a corporate thing right now. I I hate to say it, but I feel like a corporate rapper. I go to work and I come home and I'm listening to my mixtape. You know what I mean? But um rapper.

SPEAKER_00 24:05

But you know, you gotta do what you gotta do, bro. And I still work corporate too, but like that shit is like, bro, I swear to God, like when I when I finally leave corporate, I'm going to dedicate like a two-hour episode on how much I hate corporate, bro. It is so stupid.

SPEAKER_04 24:20

Yeah, you have to conform. And um it's it's hard because you know, it's like, do I chase my dreams or I have to go out and get it? Because I I don't want I I want to be self-sufficient now. I want to be able to, and I am, but like that's that's what my mindset is when I'm making that decision. Like I want to be able to pay my own rent, pay all my own bills, because if I don't, what I'm gonna do? You know what I mean? So it's like, and you can't do that by leaning entirely on your entrepreneurship. And on the other on the same side of that coin, if you don't lean all the way in on it, then you can't put your all into it. Nobody takes off on accident. These people who are successful at what they're doing, one of two things happen. Either they got lucky, which is the most slimmest chance of something happening, or B, they put their all into it until it paid off. Like when you see these some of these, like talking about my own industry when it comes to music, some of these rappers that take off and they're in their early 30s or late 20s, bro. That's not when they started making music. Two Chains wasn't, uh he didn't start making music when he was 30. He was titty boy in his 20s, and nobody knew who he was unless you lived in Atlanta. And then he took off when he was a grown man, and now he's, you know, has hit record. Same thing with Rick Ross. He was a correctional officer for the longest. And then, you know, people can talk about the identity or whatever the case may be, but he has talent regardless, and it took time for him to get there. You know, there are everybody wants that story where, oh, I'm 16 and I take off, and by the time I graduate high school, I'm the man. Or, you know, and as a college student, everybody wants that story, like, okay, I take off while I'm in school, and um, you know, and that's whatever the case may be. But, you know, these things take time. And if you're not willing to sacrifice the years it takes from in your youth to take off later on when you're not so young, then it just might not happen. And so that's why I feel like for me, I've finally gotten to the point where music has become a passion of mine, but I'm okay with it being a hobby. Like, you know, I I make music every day. I'm going to the studio after this. But I don't, you're not gonna catch me on TikTok shooking and job and trying to push out my songs every single day. Like, because that's what it takes now. It's a very oversaturated industry. Like back in the day, if you were an entrepreneur, you had to have somebody invest in you or you had to be good at what you were doing so much that you were undeniable. Now everyone can do anything. Like, I respect you, bro, but anybody can have a podcast. You could like my music all you want, but people are making music on their phones. You know what I mean? SoundCloud is free. You know what I'm saying? It's not like the 90s where you had to pay $20,000 for a beat and you know, $10,000 to make one song, like an ARs are on the corner looking for talent. They you only getting signed if you already are gonna make it.

SPEAKER_00 26:55

Yeah. But I'll I'll put it this way though. I it's it's like a catch 22 because it does kind of suck, like, you know, for you know, artists like you, you and myself, like with the podcast with the music, that the barrier to entry is lower, but I also see it as like uh I don't know, like it it like I kind of like the competition because it's like when I look back and I finally get to to where I I want to be, it's like, yeah, like I the podcasting is a really saturated niche, and I was able to climb to the top despite like the barrier of entry. And and plus like I like I always tell people, it's like bro, like starting a podcast is really not the hard. Like I'm trying to tell you, like this this is filmed on my phone, iPhone's shooting 4K, tripod's probably like $15. And these mics, like I got the older version, they got the smaller ones that you could buy for like $50. Like, bro, you can start a podcast. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 27:47

And so there's pros and cons to it. Like you said, the barrier of entry is lower, so at least it gives people the access to try something that they might like. If I didn't, if I couldn't make songs in my closet on a scarlet mic that cost $200, then I might have never even known that I that music was gonna be something that I love. Like, and so I there are definitely pros and cons to it, especially if you do, once you do get to that point, then it's like I've overcome so many people and so many different, so much of the competition because there's so many people in this industry, it's almost like you feel better. You know what I mean? And so, um, and you know, it allows room for more collaboration. So I think you definitely have a good mindset on it because some people can get intimidated or they can get demotivated or telling people.

SPEAKER_00 28:31

I hear it all the time. Like, people like just don't even want to try. Like they're like, what's the point in trying? Like, and it's like, bro, like, and one thing too, and I've I've thought about this because my sister, she a gamer, right? Mm-hmm. She likes to game, and I always be thinking, I'm like, bro, like, my sister could easily she've been gaming for years too. Like since she was probably like 12, 13. I'm like, bro, why why don't my sister just get on Twitch and I'll be just I'll be trying to like kind of push her towards that direction, but then I realized I'm like, wait, like, at least for me, it's like, bro, I I don't really care about how your comments. You know what I mean? But everybody's not like that. Some people really like, and it took a friend to ask me this question. He had he said, he was like miles, like, what made you comfortable being on camera? And when he asked me that, I was like, oh, I never thought about that. Because like when I started my podcast, I was like, oh, okay, well, I'm gonna be on camera, I'm gonna get the like it wasn't even it was like not like a thought, like, oh shit, I gotta get on camera.

SPEAKER_04 29:22

I don't give a fuck. Like everybody's not like that. And I think that's one of the main things that what weeds a lot of people out is doing it for the wrong reasons. And so for me, I love making music. Like, I dropped one song last year, and I I probably recorded north of 75 songs last year because I just like the craft. And so for those who um are looking to get in this industry, it's like, why would I do this? Why would I do that? It's like, well, you don't really love it. You know what I mean? Like you, you might you some people want to be famous, they don't want to be artists. Some people want to be popping, they don't want to be good at what they're doing. Some people don't want to be the best, they just want to be known. And that's when it but that's when there's no fun in it because it's you're chasing gratification. Yeah. And so for someone like you and I who aren't fueled by the gratification, that's not what makes us get up and do it every day, it doesn't matter. That's also why there's a certain level of peace of not immediately being to the top of the industry because I'm not doing it for the gratification. Like for me, I feel like, and I've never been there before, so I don't want to I don't want to sound like I know everything, but I honestly feel as if that there will not, like let's say I took off tomorrow and I got a huge record deal or I'm just the most known music artist, whatever the case may be. I don't think that I would enjoy music more. I think I would enjoy life more because I won't have to work to pay bills and I'll be famous, but I don't think I would enjoy the craft more because I already love the craft. I think I would have more experiences and the platform would be larger. This is the thing. You said something, it clicked for you at one point. There's this um, there's a Disney movie um called Inside Out. Okay. Have you seen it? Mm-hmm. It's a Pixar movie, it's this cartoon uh movie, it's about this pianist. He's a school teacher, he's about 50 years old. Okay, and um he's one he's been a pianist his whole life, and um his father was an artist, and um, you know, basically he's been wanting to get to the professional level for a really long time. Okay. And he's a music teacher, and he finally gets his big break. He's walking down the street, and I forgot the name of the woman in the movie, but let's just say like Gladys Knight was walking by and she heard him playing the piano, was like, My pianist is is injured tonight, come play at my show. And then so he spends the whole movie getting ready for that night, and then the whole plot is about how he like pretty much almost dies or whatever, but to land the plane here and get to the point. He finally gets on that stage in a sold-out arena, plays the piano, does one of the best performances he's ever had, and he gets that fulfillment of like I'm finally here. And um after the show, he asked Gladys Snight, he's like, So what's next? What do we do next? Like, what's going on now? Like, we just finally did that. Like, so like I'm here, I'm here. I'm I finally made it to my big break, like I finally got the opportunity, I killed it. What are we doing now? She said, We'll come back and do it tomorrow. And he had a level of disappointment, and she was like, What's wrong? You don't seem too happy. And he said, Well, I thought it would have been different. Like, I thought this moment would have been different. I've been chasing this for 50 years, and this moment isn't as fulfilling as I thought it was. And she said, Have you ever heard the story about the fish swimming in the sea? And it goes up to another fish, and it's like, and the fish is like, What are you looking for, little fish? And the fish is like, I'm trying to find the ocean. And the big fish is like, You're in the ocean. And the fish said, No, I'm not in the ocean, I'm in the sea. I'm trying to get to the ocean. And that resonated with me because I'm like, yo, it's it's it's it's all water, man. Like you hear about this big platform, you hear about this bigger stage, but if you truly enjoy swimming, when you get to the ocean, it's gonna feel like swimming in the sea, swimming in the pond. It's gonna look different, but if you really care about swimming, you still gonna be swimming in water. And so once you get to the ocean, uh uh you might have a level of disappointment with what it feels like, because you're like, man, this feels like the sea. I thought it was gonna be something different. So I saw that to say, man, like you have to have a certain level of acceptance with loving, or you have to have a level of love for the passion in itself and not the gratification. Because if you really do have that love for the passion, it's gonna all feel the same. And you won't be disappointed when you get to a certain level, or you won't be disappointed when you don't get there because you're doing it for the right reason and you're doing it for the craft in itself. Just like the pianist. He loved playing piano, but he was chasing the gratification, and the piano playing was great, but when he got to gratification, he realized he was like, This is it's the same thing. This is regular. I just paid the piano like I always do. It's just in front of more people.

SPEAKER_00 33:46

Yeah, bro. Yeah, man. Like that's why that's why I love podcasting, bro. Like, I didn't even think that I'd like I can't believe I've been doing this for two years, but it's just I really just fell in love with the craft, like just being able to sit sit down with people like yourself and just and just talk to people. Like I always was uh just a natural person to like just talk to people and I was like, fuck it, I might as well just record conversations that I have, you know what I mean? And the thing about podcasting, a lot of people don't make it. Like a lot of people are doing what you say, like chasing gratification, and they just stop after I don't know, like ten or so episodes. I'll go to their YouTube that says, Oh, it posted like six months ago, and that's fine. Like some people, like life happens, you know what I mean? So like I'm not gonna judge anybody for stop doing it, but it's like, you know, I not do it for the love of the game, man. I do it for the love of the game. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 34:33

And podcasting to me is an indust is a interesting industry to I guess stop doing because um I mean I'm not a podcaster, so I don't know all the ins and out, but like for me, there are certain passions and crafts you can have that are not centered around a platform. For me, I feel like music is like that. There are so many artists out there that I would never hear simply because they're not viral or they don't put their all into posting or they just don't get that big break. And so when it comes to podcasting, I'm not saying that you're only gonna be successful if you go viral, but if your passion is to do podcasts, or if you're doing it for the right reasons, you would think that even if they um have stuff going on, they're still gonna post what they're doing, or you're still you're still gonna see the content get uploaded because you know, unless you just love interviewing people in front of a camera, like I don't see the point in like I can see the point in going into a studio making music and paying for music and doing all of that, and then maybe somebody doesn't see it, or maybe life happens and I don't drop an album for a year, but I'm still working on my crap. But I feel like when it comes to at least podcasting, you know, unless you just stop completely, I don't think there's very many people out there that are doing it and not posting it. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 35:54

So it seems like Oh yeah, you typically if you do it, you should post it. I think there's only three no, there's two podcasts I recorded that I never posted. And I didn't post it just because I didn't like it. I but I didn't post it because audio was bad. And the thing about podcast, like if the audio is like if the video was bad, say like this was shot in 240p, I probably still post it. You know what I mean? Because the audio is more important, but yeah, the audio uh and the thing too is uh while you were while you were uh talking on on that topic, I was out to Commander yesterday, and I was out with my line brothers, and he one of them was talking about like different ways to go viral. And I'm not gonna lie, like if I genuinely would just was like, yo, like I'm just trying to get on as podcasting. I don't know, all I'd have to do is like, you know, I could do like the fresh and fits for some of the manager shit, like bring a couple girls in here, hit some of like probably go on Chad GBT and look up, okay, like how to like like what are some like hot topic questions I could ask that I'd use as clips and then I go viral. But my thing is like it's like I think you touched on it like probably within the first like 10 minutes when we're talking about brand and you were talking about being an artist, you were known for being an artist. I don't want to necessarily be known as the dude that's just like rage baiting the Yeah, that's just rage baiting this shit. I want people to genuinely like come to the pod and be like, yo, this was actually a dope conversation. Like, I can't wait to like, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04 37:16

And that's it, you know, it's interesting you say that. Um you were talking, and I was like, I'm gonna say this when he talks about it. Oh, I saw last year Netflix released uh a documentary on the Jerry Springer show. And I don't know if you've seen it, but Jerry Springer was a talk show host that talked about things of substance, like, you know, life, what you're going through, and but it was never what it was known for today. It was never a bunch of rowdy fighting, uh cheating, and all the things that um are negative. It was never centered around negativity, it was it was pretty much a positive talk show. And but they were getting terrible ratings. And they got a new executive to come in, and the executive used to host, I think it was Mad TV, or he wasn't a talk show executive. He came from a show that was centered around bullshit. And he came but the show that was centered around bullshit did so well, they brought him in and was like, we need you to give us some pointers. And he basically said, um, we're not doing anything unless uh somebody could be clicking through their TV and we get their attention and there's no noise. He was like, I want to be able to have a show where somebody would sit there and watch 22 minutes of it and there's no sound. He was like, if we can do that, then we'll be successful. Because um TV, the way it used to be, is a lot how our phones are now. People would click through the channels. They're clicking through, like, all right, like I want to see that, I don't want to see that, I want to see that. That's how we do on Instagram. Stories, stories, okay. I'm scrolling, oh, it's a podcast, I'm fly listener, that. Like, people's attention span is very small. And to land the plane here, the show stopped becoming about having genuine and real conversations and started becoming about making the show as crazy as possible so the viewership can go up. They went from being the least watched show on that um channel to the second most watched show, and then they beat Oprah one day too. Oprah was always been the number one talk show host for the longest. So they beat her one on one episode. And Jerry Springer says that he was happy about the success. He was happy that the show was thriving because the alternative was that he was gonna look for a new job. But what he wasn't happy was that he was known for something like negative, like just bringing a bunch of people on. Love triangles. Oh, I bring a couple on, and you think we're talking about our marriage, and but secretly I think you've been cheating on me, and I bring the person out that I think you're cheating with on stage, and everything unfolds on on TV. You know what I mean? Or or or I'll tell you, okay, come on the show, we're gonna talk about you know how you know you've been struggling with work and we'll fly you out, yada yada yada, and then you get on the show, and now we're talking about how broke you are, yada yada yada. You know what I'm saying? Like, and so he was saying that basically viewership. Exactly. The viewership changed from something that he genuinely loved into something that he actually hated, but unfortunately that those ne that negative content made the show what it was. And so that kind of was that that came to my mind when you were saying that, you know, if you wanted to, you could you could get on here and talk to some OnlyFans girls about how they they don't bring nothing to the table, or or talk to some guy about, you know, snitching and the and the young thug trial or all this hot stuff that there's this bullshit that people feed into, but then you know, that's not what you want your craft to be. So it won't even be working at that point.

SPEAKER_00 40:39

Yeah, nah, bro. Like, I I can't I can't do it. Like, so sometimes I really I'll be like, bro, like, this is taking too long. Like, let me just pull the trigger and just do the bullshit. But I was like, nah, like when when it's all said and done, I don't want to look back and and and be known for that shit. It all just for a bag.

SPEAKER_04 40:55

Like, I'm not selling out for a bag, but and then also you you don't get to choose your audience. Your audience chooses you. Yeah. So what you want to do is, and I remember this as an artist all the time, what you want to do is stay true to yourself because you want to build a reputation around authenticity. Absolutely. Because what's gonna happen is if you try something that's not you, you're gonna attract a bunch of people that are not you, and they're gonna expect you to be not you, and then you're gonna be leaning on being not you so you can continue doing whatever you're doing. And uh that's like with me, like I got some homies that, you know, I like I said, both my parents, first generation college students, I was raised in a stable house household. I'll never act like I come from something I don't. But I got some homies who didn't have the same upbringing. And so when I started making music with them, a lot of their substance and their songs were different than mine because they experienced things that I did not experience or that were not my story. And I've I'll admit, I've raped, I've capped them some of my raps before when I first started. I started, I talked about some stuff that I didn't really do, or some stuff that I seen and like uh, you know, put some imagery in there, or maybe um uh what's the word? I um exaggerated a little bit um on some things. And I wrote and some of it sounded good. It sounded good.

SPEAKER_03 42:13

Like, and people were like, yo, this is hard. And then I would play it for my parents and they're like, what's that about?

SPEAKER_04 42:19

And I'm like, well, like that's kind of like what people are listening to nowadays. And then they're like, okay, so let's say you take off, are you gonna fake like you this gangster? Because you're not. And it's like, no, but like I just did that because I was there. Like, or if I take off, I'll just be myself once I take off. And it's like, you think you're gonna take off being something and then switch up and be yourself and you're gonna maintain that success. And then that's when I realized I'm like, man, like, I don't even like my own music. Like, I'm rapping about stuff that I don't even relate to. I like it because I'm getting the gratification. And then so then that's when I made a shift. I got my own studio. Because part of the reason why I was doing that too was because I was at their studios. So it's not like I was going in there and being able to just make my own song. I was doing features on their songs. Yeah. And it was like, okay, sound like us, or we're not gonna put your verse on there. And it's like, all right, well, I want to be, I don't want to be left off bad and bougie. So let me let me go ahead and go ahead and cap on the case. Let me say what they want to hear. You know what I'm saying? Bang bang. Like, you know what I'm saying? So um, but yeah, that's why I think it's important to stay true to yourself because now that I've been more authentic, those around me who know me for real, one, they respect me, and they also can even enjoy my music because they know that's really me. And so whenever I release something, I know they're expecting something authentic, and I know I can love it, and they're gonna love it too, because I didn't have to do something fake. So, yeah, man, keep doing what you're doing, bro. Like, even it can be tempting. Sometimes I want to go and make a TikTok song with a dance to it and see what it does. It might get more views than any song I've ever dropped, but that's not what I want to do.

SPEAKER_00 43:41

Yeah, hell no. So I want to actually ask you, because I listened to some of your music. You you dropped something recently, though, long uh long distance. I wanted to ask you, like, what inspired you you to make that song?

SPEAKER_04 43:51

So, um, what inspired the long distance song? So for me, I try to have a bit of tradition behind my music. So there are certain dates throughout the year that I try to drop consistently on and one of those dates is Valentine's Day. Um and because I do like making music about emotion and relationships and you know whatever I'm going through, I think that has the that has the most substance to me that I can come up with other because like I'm not like I'm not rapping about anything like struggle or anything like malicious or anything like that. So if I'm a if it's not going to be a fun song, it's going to be an emotional song. So it was uh Valentine's Day was coming up and you know there's this relationship that um that I was in where the young lady didn't live in my same state and we've known each other for a long time. And so I was like this year I think I'm gonna talk about a long distance relationship because last year's Valentine's Day drop was about wanting a relationship. And I think the year before that was about uh being in a relationship that's close but you know um it's not you're not being loved out loud. So this year I'm like this theme is going to be long distance and uh I made the song in like January and I typically always make the Valentine's Day song like December or January. It just always works out. There's never it's never like a song I've been sitting on for eight months I'm like this gonna be it's always something that happened within that time period. Okay. So uh the long distance song is is inspired by being in a relationship with somebody that um you're not close to okay and then how did that go? The relationship not the song oh uh the relationship I mean it's cool she liked the song I mean it's not the first song I wrote for her you know I'm saying she liked it she thought it was good uh she had some critiques on it but you know it is what it is like uh but like you know it it's good and that's why I like doing stuff like that because you know people like it it's catchy to them but to me when I a year from now or maybe even 10 years from now I'll I'll go back and listen to that song and be like oh this is about old girl when I did this I remember this happening yada yada yada like I remember where I'm at in the moment and how I feel when I listen to my songs. That's also why I love music so much because I feel like it is like a time capsule. Yeah it's a time capsule. It's a tangible memory. Yeah that's why it's so important that it's authentic because if you capping and stuff or you putting out content that's not really you or not centered around your personality you're gonna look back on it and be embarrassed. Because you you grow as as a person. You're not the same person you were five minutes ago. So if you if you catch yourself in the heat of the moment doing some something that you think is funny or something's gonna get clicks, you might get those clicks. You might have that viral moment and you're gonna look up a year later and be like bro that's not me for real. Or why did I why did I make that my brand? Why did I go out? Why did I show everybody I know that this is what I'm thinking about in this moment because even in that moment I knew that that wasn't authentic. Now I'm even more embarrassed because I basically sold my morals for a viral moment and unless you unless you get set up with life off a capping I don't think anyone's gonna look back on doing something that's not related to their personality and be like, I'm glad I did that. Like in very few times is doing something that is unauthentic put you in a position to where you can be proud of being unauthentic. You might get a little bit of gratification out of it but it is not going to change your life. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 47:03

I was going to ask you too um what made you want to get into a long distance relationship to begin with?

SPEAKER_04 47:08

It wasn't long distance when I met her we just grew apart. Ah okay yeah so like I met her uh in college um and then you know we both moved apart and uh we maintained it it's uh it's interesting because uh the song is like she's my like girlfriend in the song but like in real life she it's been an on and off type of situation where like we really we're working on our friendship at most. Like it's gotten to a point where we both know we can't um be in each other's arms every single day and I don't want to be on the phone checking her location in another state yada yada yada so it's like we're we're maintaining a friendship until we can get to the point where we actually can settle down and really have a real relationship. Do we start feeling for each other yeah of course you know I mean like those don't fade away and you know the I think those feelings is what's making us put in the effort to maintain a relationship and find a common ground so that we don't crash out and fall out over you know petty stuff or um trying to push for something that's not realistic. So um it didn't start off that way. I don't ever jump into long distance relationships and with any intention or on purpose. I really don't even entertain somebody that's not in my vicinity but when I met her um we were in the same area and then we just kind of life pushed us apart for a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 48:24

Yeah bro the reason why I asked you that is because I got myself into a long distance like relationship we was never like really together because of the long distance and shit and I was just like bro like I don't understand how people do this shit but like yeah it's awful bro because it's like okay it's terrible you either gonna if you're gonna be a good guy in the long distance relationship you're gonna sacrifice a lot.

SPEAKER_04 48:45

It's like okay I'm going to not entertain any women that are in close distance I'm going to check up on you. Like me and old girl are in different time zones. It's only one hour but it's not a big difference but like it like it's just it's not the same thing like um and so if you're going to be in a long distance relationship and at least be a good guy in it then a lot of times the sacrifice don't feel like it's worth it. And sometimes even the sacrifice can keep you all from getting to know each other and it actually working. The distance can kill a relationship and that's um and so I feel that bro it's it's it's terrible. You either can be a terrible dude and have a second life on the side on your long distance and enjoy your life in real time which I mean other than it being morally wrong it honestly isn't that's really like the more beneficial way to go. Or you can be morally right and only talk to this one girl and go to sleep alone every night and not entertain no women and also you might be cutting yourself short because what if God pushed y'all apart for a reason? You know I'm I'm real I like I'm I believe that God brings people into your life for a reason a season or a lifetime and you are always going to learn from the people that you are around whether it's a positive lesson or a negative lesson and if you try to hold on to something that God supposed to only be a season. Yeah it's supposed to be a season then it's like you might not be able to get to the next level God has for you because you're not supposed to bring that person to that next level. You know what I mean that might not be your wife that might have just been your college shorty or that might have just been a girl that helps you get through uh whatever phase you were going through at the moment and that's okay. You don't have to force something there just because you like them. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 50:22

Yeah no I feel that 100% bro and then another thing too about long distance relationships is like for me it was the same amount of work as a regular one. I'm like bruh like I'm putting in the same amount of work for Valentine's Days same consideration same same everything.

SPEAKER_04 50:40

It might be more because now we got to see each other. So now it's like okay am I flying I uh the cheapest option is I fly to you or we can have a conversation about okay are you going to buy your own ticket or I got to be the man to buy you out here. And I'm flying you out here and then it's like okay now I gotta like you know it's just it's expensive it's uh it's the same amount of work and honestly when it's distance you depending on how the trust is you might be dealing with a lot of insecurities from both ends. Men are insecure and women are insecure too. If you tell me you're going out tonight and you're gonna be back later you'll call me later and you don't call me to the next morning I don't know what you did.

SPEAKER_00 51:12

Facts we in the same city I know what you did because I'm at home you're supposed to pull up at home or I'm a or I know I'm saying whatever or at least I got like eyes in the city eyes in the city yo I get a call from somebody like oh I just saw so and so I was like oh okay good looks exactly if you somewhere it's all trust and so there's a lot of barriers to it it's more work than close distance for sure. Yeah yeah bro yeah I just told her this last week because she came out to come see me this last weekend and then on Sunday so like what almost a week ago I told her I was like bro like I just can't do this anymore. And she was understanding like we still on good terms and we still like kind of talk here and there but it's like it's no bad boy.

SPEAKER_04 51:52

That's the and I always think that's the best thing. I think that's also why me and old girl who the song was about are still in a good place because some people wait until it crashes and burns for it to be over with. Yeah. And it it communication is everything. If you tell a woman hey look I got a lot going on in life this distance is kind of like making it difficult for me I'm not saying I don't want to be with you but the expectations that are placed upon me right now are too much to handle. And I don't want to put you in a position where you feel like you've been neglected I don't want us to go outside. I think right now since we have a good relationship let's pull back a little bit um and then it's on that person to decide okay well if you're not gonna be my boyfriend or girlfriend then I'm not gonna I don't want to keep talking to you. Okay cool that's your choice or they can say okay I actually understand where you're coming from I've been thinking about this a lot too let's pull back a bit you know we care about each other so we can check in and have conversations and stuff but I'm not you don't owe me a text when you get home you don't have to say good morning you don't have to send me flowers you don't gotta fly me out whatever you do can be the icing on the cake but you're no longer held to the expectation you know what I'm saying and then um and when that happens it's just much more organic too. Like I feel like one of the reasons why me and old girl are so tight right now because it's just so organic like we didn't force nothing. If it didn't work we start talking for months then it's like then I'll get the I miss you text a few months later then it's like well I was thinking about you too what's up how you been and then I don't mean that we together again but now we're talking again. Now I'm checking on you again then it builds up now we're talking every day then it's like okay I'm gonna come see you like it's just more organic with less expectations especially if you have good intentions with the other person in mind. None of this stuff matters if you have bad intentions. Look at I'm not good but keep going. If you have bad intentions in a relationship none of the parameters matter none of the boundaries matter because you're not you're you're not treating the other person with um consideration and you don't have the best interest in mind. But if you are two people that care and tell the truth and honor each other's boundaries then it it can work out. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 53:51

Yeah man so like what what you guys left off at just like we cool I was on the phone with her before I came in here today.

SPEAKER_04 53:58

We cool like you know I'm saying she knows I'm in DC she's in Atlanta right now doing her thing and um we should we there we even joke about stuff like I'm going to the studio later with my homies and I got some vibes coming through. I told her that I'm like oh yeah I'm going to studio we're gonna shoot some videos I'm gonna shoot some content I got some shorties pulling up it's gonna be a whole little vibe kind of like a section uh next to the mic and um she didn't get jealous or nothing like that but she was like okay well enjoy your time with the hoes and we laughed about it and I'll talk to her later after I'm done hanging out with the hoes I'll talk to her later and we'll okay because it's like I told her we and we where it's it's open communication it's the truth shoot she might I don't know she might go hang out in some dude's section later on tonight you're not finna catch me blowing up a phone because I see her on Instagram posting some bottles because I know you didn't buy those bottles I know that's not your section. So I know you're with I know you're with men you're with other men. So I'm probably gonna call her and I I will call her and troll her a little bit but I we're not gonna fall out about it. I'm not gonna raise hell and ruin her night you know what I mean so um that's why I say it's so important to me to be communicative or communicative about it and also tell the truth. Another reason why women be getting mad at dudes is because they be lying and dudes be bad liars. Like a woman will one one it's the right thing to do to tell the truth and two they'll respect you for telling the truth more especially when they know that you know it's gonna make them upset. And so or not even make them upset but it might not be something that they want to hear. Like me hanging out with shorty in the studio isn't making her upset. Like it's cool she cool if she was upset she would've let me know. But if I would have told I was going to the studio with my homies and then she look on some girl Instagram and I'm on a mic rapping and she like oh so you was with such and such why you ain't telling me now I look like I'm being sneaky. Yeah you know what I'm saying now it's like oh you you played me for a fool and you're trying to lie to me. And so it's like it's it's just better is to be truthful. Sometimes I tell too much of the truth but I I don't mind I I'll always do it. Because you can never say I lied to you you can never say I misled you you made the decision to stay around me based on and I kept it truthful and vice versa. She tells me the truth all the time too so it's like I'm making the decision to continue being contact with her too.

SPEAKER_00 56:07

Yeah man leading with the truth and just like we talked about earlier like just being your authentic self it's like bro like obviously like if you have morals don't be your authentic self if you are your line like definitely switch this switch that shit up so you should oh man you said um I think you said you had some uh some topics that you wanted to talk to talk about like what what were those?

SPEAKER_04 56:26

Uh you low key um spearheaded the conversation and we led through them. I want to talk about the main thing I wanted to make sure that I was able to articulate on this podcast was that like if there's any entrepreneurs out there or anybody with a passion or anybody with hobbies that they want to make their main life goal understand that other people with the same aspirations are going through what you're going through. There's pros and cons. You can either be all in and struggle until it takes off and deal with the cons of passing up opportunities and putting your energy in what and conforming to a career and you know if it works out it works out or you know you got to sacrifice or you can you know completely ditch it and be successful in your career or pursue a career wholeheartedly or full time and have all the things in life that you want like being self-sufficient is the main thing for me. And as a man being able to support a family because I want to have a family and I want to make sure that if nobody in my family works we still good and everybody got what they need. Everything else is icing on the cake. And so you can pursue that and you know get the benefits of that and then but still feel like you look up in you 30 and like man like I wish I would have tried or I wish I would have gone for that. That's why people resent you know the people around them when they get older and they choose that path because it's like let's say I was in college like I had everything with college I was a successful rapper, popular yada yada yada then I get out of school and I just pursue my career and start a family with old girl. I might be 35 years old like man what a life would have been like if I would have tried because I went from having emotions to just trying to conform to life. And then that's how people go through midlife crises too. That's how people come 40 and they want to dress like youngins and be fashionable because they never experimented with their fashion when they was younger. They never rapped when they was younger they never pursued their hobbies when they was younger is like I get the pros and cons of both sides. And I don't have any advice to anybody on how to deal with it because I don't even know how to deal with it. The option I've chosen is the best of both worlds because I have to be self-sufficient. I have to pay bills I have to have a job I have to have a career I'm trying to be an attorney so I have to study I have to go back to school but I also love music so I do it on the side as well but I don't let music get in the way of me obtaining the life goals that I want. And the reason why I chose that option was because if God came to me and said all right do you want all the things that you want in life when it comes to family self-sufficiency being debt free savings um you know making your parents proud and being a leader and example in your community do you want those things or would you rather just make music and not have to worry about anything at all? Not be broke but like in this scenario it's not like broke or rich but it's like would you rather you know be successful in life and conform and do all the things you want when it comes to the the six things I just listed or would you rather not have to worry about a single thing and only make music then I'll be honest I would choose the work hard and get everything that I listed like the family man, the self-sufficiency, the successful the career the leader in the community I would choose that than to just be able to idle and only make music. I love music but I realize that the things that I want in life when it comes to family leadership and community matter more to me than just making songs especially if I can make songs and still do those things. So that's why I chose to pursue my career and make it a hobby. I didn't make it my dream and ha I don't have a pipe dream. I have my life and I'm successful there and I'm working on being better there as a 25 year old and I have my passion. That's why I'm in DC going to the studio.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:05

I don't do this all the time but you know it's this weekend I'm doing it so I'm going I'm gonna put my all into it this weekend and then when Monday comes I'm back at work to that but one thing you were talking about in terms of like midlife crisis crises and like people like having that resentment yeah resentment and there was that inflection point like you were talking about in the family man settling down. Can you think of any inflection points in your life where you were like damn like if this one event or this one choice I made if I made a different choice would have changed my entire life yes um when you asked me why I went to Howard uh when I was in high school um I was play I played sports.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:47

My dad loves football. I mean he's one of those guys where he also didn't choose a pipe dream. He played football in high school full scholarship in college he even participated in NFL combine but he also got a job offer when he graduated school and he was like okay do I want to go beat my body up and try and make it in the NFL because he could he could have got on a squad but people don't realize when you get to the NFL that's not it. Like 60% of the team well I'm not gonna throw stats out there because I never looked at it but a lot of people on the team get cut before the season even gets started. I have family members who are in the NFL and now they are in now they're playing in Canada and stuff they got you know I mean it's a long shot. And then what if you get injured yada yada yada so um he chose to do the career path and it worked out for him and he's doing everything he needed and but football is his life. Growing up he put me in football I didn't really like football um but I started wrestling during the offseason so that I could stay in shape and I fell in love with wrestling. When I was in high school I became the wrestling team captain on JB my freshman year and I I wrestled varsity freshman year but I was a JB team captain and then my sophomore year uh I wrestled varsity as well and I went to districts and got third. I was very successful at a young age when it comes to wrestling um but I decided that I wanted to change schools and I went to performing art school the performing art school in downtown Dallas called Booker T Washington High School for the performing and visual arts. Erica Badu went there um and that school is I don't know if you've seen the show Victorious but it's literally like that people painting on lockers there's there's plays going on in the hall there's dancers and ballets going around the hallway they did like it's it's literally like that. There's math class and stuff but if you're not in math or if you're not in your core subjects you're in an art related class. And so when I went there I met um Gwynna Bennett Price who graduated from Howard University with um uh Taraji P. Henson. They were in the same acting class and she encouraged me to pursue Howard as well and in the same year I end up going on that trip with my sister, yada yada yada. But more of the story the choice that I look back on and think about was that choice to go to that performing art school made me take creativity more seriously and help cultivate my personality around creativity. Had I not done that I probably would have got a wrestling scholarship I probably would have gone to a PWI and I probably would not have been I wouldn't have been a Howard. Everything would have been different. I don't know what I would have done. I'm not saying I would have been a wrestling Olympian or whatever but I I life would have looked very differently for me and it wouldn't have been catered around the community that I've grown to love right now. So I don't regret that decision but I do know that changing high schools was a pivotal change in my life and the direction I was going. Because I at first I was a jock team captain at a predominantly white school looking at predominantly white colleges and then I went to downtown and all my like my mentors and coaches were black and even Erica would come back to the school and visit sometimes and I went to HBCU and now I'm here where I'm at.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:46

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:46

But high school is where that when I think of it that's the moment I can think of where things like really changed?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:52

Yeah. So like okay so you were like what a sophomore so you were like 16 like typically like once you at least for me it's like I had like my core like friends in my school and thinking about like oh let me go to other high school it's like oh shit like I'm leaving like damn near a whole different life behind and like basically starting over. So like what made you want to do that?

SPEAKER_04 1:04:12

Well the uh what made me want to do it was this the friends or people I was around at my high school uh I didn't like that much. I wasn't um the first one I think the first one the first one I didn't like it that much. I had so like they were cool but I used to get in trouble with them a lot like and you know um they used to like kind of cast me out a little bit because they didn't live in the suburbs like I did. Like when I went to a predominantly white high school I made friends with the black kids there. You know what I mean? Because they look like me they talk like me to an extent and um you know they I felt comfortable around them. But I was an outcast because I didn't live in a neighborhood they lived in. They live on a different side of town that wasn't to the same on the same class as I was and so um that wasn't a part of my decision making but my parents peeped they're like okay Miles is around a crowd that he doesn't really fit in. Like he doesn't want to hang out with his neighbors because they don't look like him which is completely understandable um but the crowd that he's with is not good for him and there's a school in downtown that you know it would be good for him and I did a lot of creative stuff over the summer but when school came around it was all sports. And so that's when I auditioned for the school I changed schools and I met my best friend to this day his name is Juju and um and I met him on the first day I was there he came up to me was like yo bro what's up you say you're the new kid right I said yeah I'm I said I'm Drew he said um I know you're eating your lunch and everything but we play basketball by the garage every day of lunch if you want to come out there. I said I bet I go out there other kids out there shooting hoops and ever since then I mean we just hung out every single day and so that's another reason why I feel like it was such a good move for me because I made different friends when I got to the other school and it was more tailored around my actual personality and him I didn't grow up the same either, but he don't hate, he don't make fun of me. He like he like my dad looked at him like another son. Like none of them other kids, my dad was like, nah, they're not. You know what I'm saying? But I got real authentic friends now. So the friendship wasn't a barrier or a hurdle or any type of caveat to making that decision because I didn't everybody I was around, I could have took it or leave it. And then when I got to my new school, um, those are my real friends for sure. Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:25

I fuck with that, bro. Like a lot of my like I kind of have a similar inflection point too, was m the school I went to. Well, I went to a Montessori school from like first to fourth grade, like 30 minutes out. I I actually hated it, I ain't gonna lie. I went to I don't know why they didn't let me in the school district down the street. But once I finally started going there, and then I also started playing soccer, like some of those same teammates on that first soccer squad when we were what under 12s, or some of my friends today, like I literally was in his wedding like two weeks ago, three weeks ago, something like that. Like, when you really find like those, you know, those core people that you like stick with for life, like that shit, that shit powerful. Like just, you know, I'm I'm very fortunate to like have like good people in my circle, you know what I mean? Like I I be hearing stories about like you know, people falling out with certain people in high school, college, shit like that. But like I'm very fortunate to have like friends and we went through the different seasons too. Like one of my best friends I met in fourth grade when I first started going to that school, me and him didn't even like each other. And then I went to college and then we basically barely never talked. But like we s now, like I literally called him like a couple days ago because I need some help with with some shit. And it's just it's just it's just cool to see like the different seasons I've been with.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:41

It's crazy you say that because um I have two homies that I met before I went to college. One of them is Juju that I met at my new school that walked up to me on the first day I was there. And then I have one, his name is Braylon. We never went to the same middle school, elementary, we never went to the same elementary, middle, or high school, but we played on the same pop horn team. And so I met him when I was in third grade, and um so he was he's still, I mean, that's actually my oldest friend to this day. Like I I love bro. But um, uh, so he wasn't a part of the community I was mentioning when I was saying I had the wrong friends. He was always the right type of friend. Him, his father and my father are actually real close too. Um, but when you say different seasons, like, bro, I when we used to go to practice, like he used to talk shit to me. Like, yo, bro, get your shit together, bro. Like, like, like um, you know, cover your man, yada, yada, yada. And we played basketball, football, uh, uh, all that together. And um, and he is a natural athlete. So he was always like the captain or the team leader. And uh I was kind of a late bloomer. Like, I would go out there and dick around, bro. I was like, yo, man, I don't even want to be here right now. Like, I hate football. Like my dad likes this, I'm out here because of him. But he loved it. He was like, well, if you're gonna be on my team, you're gonna nut up or shut up. And I was like, all right. So like it wasn't that we weren't friends, but our relationship was like we lose to bump heads just because um, you know, it just is how it was at the time. And then I if you asked me back then if I had to pick anybody on the team who was least likely to be like my closest homie in 10, 15 years, um, he would be on that list. Not because I didn't like him, just because we did not like hit it off very much outside of just being on the same squad. And then we grew up and like, you know, you mature, you go through seasons, and now like, bro, he's my best friend. You know what I'm saying? So yeah, it's crazy you say that because I feel the same way about one of my closest homies. Like it was a I don't know, and I don't even know when it did it changed. Like in elementary and in middle school, it was kind of the same. He used to come over and stuff, and we'd laugh or like slap box or argue at the crib or whatever. We were still homies, but like uh it didn't feel like we was like best buzz. Like I feel like if I called him my best friend, he'd look at me like I got a homie that I like more than you. Like, you know what I'm saying? And then uh and then all of a sudden I think it was like college. Like he visited me during undergrad, he stayed in my crib when I was in school. He went to P V actually, and so he went to HBCU too, and like I think it was college, we just grew up and it was like, yo, bro, like we brothers for real. And ever since then it was just like no doubt, bro. Like so.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:14

Yeah. So now um I know I know friendship's like a really key theme for for your fraternity, and now you know, we're probably six well, we're not the same frat, but we cross the same year, six years, six years in. Like as you reflect on your six years, like what is like more or less like the biggest takeaway or the biggest lesson that you learn being in the frat?

SPEAKER_04 1:10:38

I wanna I d I want to say a positive lesson, but it's so hard because I'm just gonna be so authentic. Like, I learned that like yo, people get to a certain stage or status in life and they like rebrand themselves or they try and be something they're not. Like, I'm a Q, bro, and I always was I was cool before I got the letters, but I know a lot of people who they got the letters and it just changed them completely. Like, you wouldn't have talked to that person that way before you was a bros, but now you got a bunch of friends with you and we're all matching, so you want to talk to him that way. You know what I'm saying? It's like we got the same shirt on, so you want to talk crazy with him. This is not a gang. This is a black Greek letter organization. Yeah. It's very far from a gang. And people get into this, and it makes them like they rebrand themselves and they and they become weird, bro. And I realized that um when I got into the fraternity, like you gotta look out for some people because you don't really know where people come from or the real people. You go to work, you don't know how to do act outside of work. You go, you, you go to school, you don't know how that person was in high school before they got here. You join a frack, you don't know how they are. You don't really know people until you are in the thick of it with them. Yeah. And so um it made me take friendship even more seriously because the ones that I do fool with, um, I fool with heavy. And um it's crazy because, you know, like you said, uh friendship is our motto, you know, friendship is essential to the soul. Like that's real. And um I had and I and I learned and it's really a a microcosm of life um that, you know, with this whole Howard, we're talking about it earlier, Howard's not a real place. Being Greek on Howard's campus is not like being adult in the real world. Like, it's it's not. Like you you become Greek and the school and the culture says these are the people to praise and support and look up to. You get out into the real world and it's like, why are you strolling at the bar, bro? Like, be normal. Or why are you like, why are you like acting like you're somebody we don't even know you? Like on Howard's campus, you can be Greek and somebody cannot know you and respect you. It's it's weird. Like, it's a lot it's a certain level of fame. And you get into the real world, bro, don't nobody care. White like, and we're the minority. So if you get it, you go go corporate, there are white Greeks. They s they use past tense terms. Oh, I was in a frat. Yeah. Or when I was in that frat, when I was in that. There are not a lot of people that this is a lifetime commitment for them. And there's not very many people that I know, to my knowledge, because I don't know history on white fraternities, but there's no there's no um postgraduate chapters and these white fraternities. Like they do it in school and then they stop. And it's like, um, so it's it's just kind of I don't know, it's a it's a it's a it's it's it's it's not real. Yeah. The fraternity's real, but the the perception of you because you're in the fraternity on campus is only here. This is the only bubble. And that's why people are scared to grow up and move on. That's why you got people who are uh my age at the parties. Like, bro, I feel, I would feel, I feel like if you see me at bro, Hannah God, if you see me at any Q party, Howard Q party, bro, tap me on the shoulder and sit me down to ask what's going on with me.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:03

Like, I feel like I am and I'm 25 years old. Like, you know what I mean? You're not that far removed. I'm not that far, but I still feel like it's unacceptable.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:14

And so, like, if you are, yo, bro, like, if you don't go here, get gone, man. Like, I probably I think you get, you get, yo, and you get, there are certain excuses, or I'm not gonna say excuses, but there are certain passes you get. Like, like like probate. Probate probate, okay. Probate, you okay, probate is cool, but also like go to the grown probate group. Don't go to the, if they're having a house party for the Neos, if you're not, if you're under 25 or older 25, you don't need to be there. And I honestly think if you're older 20, like after one year removed, I felt like kind of iffy, but I was around because I used the excuse of, oh, those are my Neos. Like, okay. Like, who, if I'm not gonna be there, you're only used that excuse for so long.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:55

Oh, for so long.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:56

For so long. Like, I it's it is spring 26th. I don't know what's gonna happen, but I already have three sets of Neos. They don't need me there. I don't have to show them how to hop. There are so many people who can show them already. I don't need to be there. I will see you at the friendship group, the fellowship.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:14

I'll see you when it's just us. Yeah, or when we go to like park or something. Yeah, like a chat. You can come to the older stuff.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:21

Like, but I'm not going to the younger stuff. You know what I'm saying? And that's also why, even, and that's that's like I said, Microcosmalife. That's how Rebels was too. Like, bro, when we threw, we threw freshman week every single year. When we are when after our senior year and we graduated that first year, it felt so weird not to be on the yard freshman week. But we did not to be, we did not need to be on the yard freshman week. That's why we brought in a lineage. That's why we have our youngins running it. We don't need to be there. We don't need to be at the uh a senior night at Rose Bar uh just because we got a free section. I'm not going to that have work in the morning. I'm not going to Rose Bar on Thursday for senior night. I'm a senior citizen.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:59

I'm not going. We ain't that old. No, I feel that, bro. I feel that 100%. I literally was uh, you know, I saw obviously be around my uh be around my news. We was out um yesterday for so me and my line brothers, we got dinner, and then afterwards, some of my some of my Neos, and actually one of my profites was at Pierre. We was like, okay, we pulled up. Last night?

SPEAKER_04 1:16:20

Yeah. I was there too. I left at uh but I left at like uh 10. I was there with Reg, Jew, and uh Jock. Oh yeah, yeah. I I I heard um y'all was there.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:30

But I didn't get there. Yeah, I was out of there about 10. Yeah, yeah. But some of the Zetas was there and they think it was cool, blah, blah, blah, X, Y, Z. And like basically still on campus, they still like I don't think they understand like my age, because they still will be like, oh Miles, we about you gonna be at the house party?

SPEAKER_03 1:16:48

No. No, that's another thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:50

You have to say no because like to your friends, it's acceptable and they don't get it because they're younger. Like, if I show up, if I show up to, like, for instance, last night, I was hanging out with, you know, I mean, they're like first year removed graduate. Let's just say I hang out with some of my Neos that are still on campus and we meet up at like brunch today. Let's say we went to brunch today, you know what I'm saying? I'm with my Neos. They will be like, yo, we having a kickback later on. Uh pull up, it's gonna be fun. Like, we're gonna turn the game on. We're gonna have some some some oil there, we're gonna kick it. Like, that is an innocent invitation, but it is not uh, you don't need I don't need to go because I know who's gonna be there. It's gonna be HU27 or 8, whatever it is now there. I don't need to be there. And I'm gonna be that old dude in the corner, just like, why am I here? Like, I shouldn't be here. Like it was fun hanging out in our own space, but I don't need to be at the undergrad nothings. So like, yeah, you'll get those invitations because it's it's some people, and maybe I don't want to say maybe I'm reading too deep into it because some people genuinely need to let it go. But uh to me, I just never want to get off that perception. And one time, I'll speak on it. I'm not embarrassed. One time a girl told me she was like, I don't think you should be here, bro. I was like, Wait, are you serious?

SPEAKER_03 1:18:01

Bro, and listen, I'm gonna tell you. So um that's crazy that's crazy. Let me say this before I say anything. Especially that show, was that your function too? No, no, no. Okay, I'll say that. It wasn't my shit.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:12

It wasn't my shit. I would have told her you don't need to be here, like we're talking about. But um uh let me say this before I say anything. When I was in college, El Ray, you were there, I mean you were what, you were H220? Yeah. Yeah, so you were you were there when I was there. Correct me if I'm wrong, but in 2018 to like 2020 to COVID, El Ray was like 22 years old to like 26 to 28 years old. If you were 21, then you were like the youngin' in there. But it wasn't the I just got my ID, let me hit the hit the function spot. It was like the older spot because it was one of the more expensive places on U Street. And like it just, to me, I felt like I was with the old heads when I used to go to L Ray at 21 and 20.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:57

And so, um Bro, wait, wait, before you before you go, like for me, L Ray, like, so I turned 21 kind of fairly like my fall of my junior year. I didn't really start going to L Ray until probably I was a senior because a lot of people like it was almost like a and I never had a fake either. So it was like a rite of passage for me to like go to L Ray, but I'm gonna let you keep going.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:17

So, and I'm glad you said that. It was a rite of passage. You don't really go into it's it's a post-grad bar. I'll just summarize it at that. I won't gotta talk about age, it's a post-grad bar. And um, and if you're an undergrad there, you're like wide-eyed because you're like, yo, this shit jumping, like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:32

So and keep in mind, this is also pre-like speaker DJ and L Ray.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:38

L Ray was not, there wasn't no speaker to put TV in there, like no.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:42

One TV like in the area. And it's crazy because whenever I meet like these new niggas and I tell them, I'm like, bro, I need you to understand. L Ray was just as, if not more, jumping before they had the DJ. Exactly. It was it was more jumping. You I did go to L Ray like by myself because I knew that there was gonna be people there that I knew.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:00

Exactly. Like, exactly. So pre-COVID, that's how it was, that's the age group, yada, yada, yada. So um I'm in the chat with some of my uh my profites come in town older than me. They're like, yo, like uh it's Friday, everybody off work, let's just meet at L Ray and hang out. Cool. Little did I know, and this is why I said it earlier, it was like senior night or something. And this is the thing about an upperclassman groove. A upperclassman groove is for upperclassmen, but underclassmen try to wiggle their way there. So, and I don't know what's up with the management with L Ray now, but they don't even check IDs for real. Like if you're if you go there enough, the management they'll just let you in, security lets you in. So it's not like a 21 years old is the youngest there. You might catch a 19-year-old in there. And so the age gap for the popularity of L Ray has dropped significantly on a regular Friday night. And so I was in there hanging out with my profiles. I seen somebody Neo's and I was good, yada, yada, yada. Their classes in there. Mind you, I'm 24 when this happened, right? A senior who's 21, pushing 22, was like, yo, didn't you graduate like five years ago? Why are you here? I'm like, first of all, we were in school together. Like, I you know my name, like you know who I am. Like we both were in school together. And so when she said that, it confirmed the like I'm not overthinking this shit. Because she said it in a space where she wasn't even warranted to say that. Yeah. Like this is L Ray. Like, I could be here at 24 years old. Now, that's like to land the plane here, that's why I feel like after a certain age, you don't need to be in other spaces, like the Neo group, the undergrad group. It no, like after your after a certain age, like honestly, for me, my my thing is if once I walked the stage, I wasn't going to anything undergrad related. Because when I was a senior, I didn't want to go to nothing undergrad related because all the undergrad related stuff was like 19, 20 year olds anyway. So, yeah, no, that's why I said it's not an overthinking thing because somebody pulled me to the side and told me. Yeah, but I'm not gonna lie.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:52

I'm just imagining someone pulling you to the side and be like, yo, you'd be here. That's good. That's so crazy, especially because it's like a bro, this is a public bar.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:59

Like this is a public school. I'm not at Howard Ray, I'm at L Ray on U Street in the A, and that I'm 24. You can't get in unless you're 21. It's not my fault that they let in all these youngers in here. And that's when I told myself, I said, bro, if it's not homecoming or something nostalgic, I'm not going on a regular night because it's it didn't turn into something that it's not, like or that it wasn't used to be. Like I like it's just a younger crowd there now. But um, yeah, that's that story, bro. I had to tell her, I said, yo, don't run my night, bro. I'm having a good time.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:28

The shit. Well, you said, okay, so kind of going back um to my original question I asked you about your friend, you said something negative, and then we kind of went down that that rabbit hole. Honestly, like I think that's like it's definitely a Greek thing, but I think it's really like also a Howard thing. Like people like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:47

It's an alpha chapter thing for sure. Yeah, like it's like like uh go ahead, I didn't need to go.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:52

Yeah, no, no, no. It's just like people just I that's why I say I am very glad. I I didn't, I'm not gonna say every person I met, like, I was mad cool with at Howard, blah, blah, blah. We didn't fall out. I definitely fell out with some people at Howard. But it wasn't it, I didn't have any, I never had any really bad roommates. I didn't really have any super duper big fallouts like with people. And the fallouts I did have were like early. It was like freshman sophomore year. By junior year, I was it was yeah, I was locked in.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:21

I I was locked in. I think the reason why Howard Greek is like that, because you gotta think about a couple, there are a couple of variables that go into why it's become where it's at. The first thing is it's the illustrious Howard University. You got a bunch of Jack and Jill kids coming to school, and I can say that because I wasn't in Jack and Jill. You said what? I was not. Oh, I wasn't in Jack and Jill. And I don't have any hate on Jack and Jill. My sister did it. Like I went to her uh Really? Yeah. Why didn't your parents put you through it? Because it just was like, uh oh, because when she did it, we were still living and going to that one school, and then we moved to downtown. I had a bunch of other stuff going on. So it just was like, it wasn't, and they also knew it wasn't really for me. Like, you're not gonna teach me where a spoon goes on a like on a table.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:03

Like Bro, that's dead what the niggas was having.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:06

I know. I wasn't and I I had to, and I was one of her um, I think it's like I don't know if it's a debuton or whatever it's called, but like one of her like one of that thing, like her group people, like I was their like dance partner for some event they had. So I had to show up to certain stuff uh and basically I wasn't in it, but for like a month, like I felt like I was.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:24

I'm trying to tell you, like, uh I don't think people understand, like I unfortunately did Jack Jill. I get I always catch strays for it. And I need them people to understand that one, my parents forced me to do it, but two, it's like I didn't even like my chapter. Like, at least for for me where I was at, it was like, I don't know if it was like this, like where you was at, but like I definitely I grew up in the suburbs, right? But like we still had like a predominantly black basketball team, a predominantly black football team. Like we there was still black, like black people. But like the people I was in Jack and Jill with, like, they was like, like in my suburbs was like like at like let's say like an eight. Like they was like at 11. I'm talking about like they were like probably like the only like black person at their school. Like, yeah. I remember I went to one of their basketball games, entire basketball team. Right.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:14

You know what? And this is the thing, and I don't want to I I was trolling a little bit, but I don't want to like hate on Jack and Jill because I honestly I don't like They have good intentions. I'm about to say, and that's what I want to touch on, and I'm gonna I'm gonna summarize my point prior to so I don't go off on a tangent, but black organizations get a lot of hate um from the outside looking in, but no one ever talks about the origins and the original intentions behind these organizations. When you look at the early 1900s from like I mean like 19 oh I don't know, when was the uh the the the uh scholarship Greek organization, the scholarship fraternity uh is it uh Phi Beta Kappa? The it's like the it's like if you have a certain GPA and you do like a certain you know what I'm talking about. I think uh it's not AK SI. No, it's like Tau Beta Cigars or something like that. Something like that. But like, and because I'm not in it, so I never researched it, but like from I think that's the first one, but like from like the early 1900s all the way into like the late 1920s, there was a surge of black organizations from the the D9 to Jack and Jill to the the scholarship organization I was talking about. There's multiple orgs that that started coming around. Even like I don't know the history behind uh the black Freemasons, but like that whole time period, like the whole point was like, okay, look, we are we as a community are starting to get a certain level of freedom and we're trying to get to a certain level of respect. And so when you have a black person that goes and becomes a doctor and he marries a dentist and they have a black child and they go to a white neighborhood where it's safer at the time, and I mean, and they grow up in a community of white people, you want them to be around people that look like them. At the same time, you don't want them hanging around people that they can't relate to because you don't want them to be ashamed of how they're grown up. You don't want them to uh not understand the lessons that you're teaching them. So Jack and Joe was created for those successful black people to have families in a community to be around each other so that their kids can be around other kids they can relate to and not be ashamed to be around uh the people that don't look like them in their community. At the same time, they didn't want them to go through some of the stuff I went through where you hang around kids that aren't in your community because they look like you, and they like, oh, you better head back to the suburbs, you better go, or they call you white because you wanna go to college, yada yada yada. You don't want them to go through that. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:49

You know what I'm saying? Like, I got called I got it's crazy. I got clowned in high school for asking people what college they wanted to go to.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:55

Like, I remember I hit the chat, I'm like, yeah, bro, I just came back from Howard, bro, that's where I'm going. Like, oh, you going to college? That's crazy. Like, I forgot your parents is rich. I'm like, first of all, I got a scholarship, number one. They could be dead broke and I still would have been able to go to Howard now. Um, and second of all, you don't know what they make, so like chill out. But like, because I have self-security, I didn't let that detour me. But some people would dead let it knock their shine because they don't have people around them that have similar like mind uh are not like-minded. And so to summarize and get back to my original point, I don't want to hate on any black organization because I know that a lot of the narratives have shifted from the original purpose of the organization, but it's still all built on black success and wanting to uplift the community. And I think it's the right side of black history. There's a lot of things that are involved in black culture and black history, and for people to hate on Greek life more than they hate on people who are promoting negative things blows my mind. But um, yeah, no, the you asked me about Oh, we were talking okay, so we we were talking about Howard and Oh, why the Greek life is like it is. So now I'm about to, I guess. So with with the what I just said, keep that in mind, because now I'm gonna hate on it a little bit. So black the reason why black Greek life is like that at Howard is because you got a bunch of kids who come from these upper echelon families and come from these nice neighborhoods. Not everybody at Howard grew up the same or did never been through nothing, but a good majority of people who can afford this school come from a well decent home. And then so they get here, and Howard says, We're the number one HBCU, we're so illustrious, yada yada, yada. Carry yourself as such. And then they decide they want to be Greek. And then you look, there's like five alpha chapters or something like that on Howard's campus, four of them or something like that. And so it's like, not only are you already at a school that tells you to have some type of like to be patriotic about it, then you join a chapter that is the origin. And so now it's like you're around a bunch of people that like everybody's head's gassed up. You know what I mean? So there's no, there's not there's no level of humility when it comes to walking around, which is why um I feel like it is the way it is, because and people like kind of turn their nose up at it because it's like, yo, like you think you're X, Y, and Z because you joined this, and it's like, well, everyone told me I was X, Y, and Z because I joined this. And I go to a school full of people that are like X, Y, and Z. Yeah, it's like a That's how do you have because it's like it's this, it's this, it's this um brainwashing thing that goes on. And then pros and cons of everything. You get a certain level of confidence, you carry yourself in a certain manner, you're around certain people that have achieved certain things, the networking is great, cool. Then it's also like But some people take it too far. Some people take it too far and they think they're better than everybody. And it's like, yo, you haven't achieved anything other than those letters. Me and you both go here. Me and you both uh are gonna graduate from here, but you're gonna stroll across stage and I'm not. Like, that makes you better than me. Like what? Like I might, like, you know what I'm saying? Like, and that's why like there are you don't have to be Greek to be good. You know what I'm saying? You don't have to be like letters don't change you. I always tell people when people ask me for advice about like pursuing fraternity or what changed, yada, yada, yada, I always try to highlight before I tell them the things that, because there are things that change, there are pros and cons to it, but I always tell them before I get into all the hype, cool stuff that they want to hear. You, if you're lame without letters, when I put that shirt on you, you're gonna be lame. The only difference is more people are gonna know you're like you because more people are gonna be looking at you. If I can walk into a room and I can pull three out of five girls out of that room, when I get these, when I put this shirt on, I'm pulling 30 out of 50, just because there's more people looking. But it's the ratio ain't gonna change, bro. I'm gonna be the same guy. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:31:36

It's just gonna be like the same thing about money. It's like it just amplifies who you are. Just because you have money don't necessarily mean that money not gonna unlame you. Exactly. You know what I mean? So yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:46

Facts. Only thing you're gonna be able to do is maybe hide it until someone gets to know you. And what's the point in maintaining a reputation to people that don't know you? When you actually Yeah, these girls might think that you're cool because you're a part of the org, but when you have the conversation with them, it might fizzle out if you're actually not cool. So what's the point of everybody thinking you're cool when they when you actually run up to them, you're not cool. Yeah. So yeah, that it don't change it, it changes people's self-um, like the way they look at themselves, but um, it done change who they actually are when you get to know them.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:19

Yeah, definitely. But shit, we've been rapping for a good minute. This is a good conversation, bro. Like, I've been full of it. I'm excited to see how this turned out. I'm gonna laugh my ass off. Shit, is there anything else you want to leave the people with today before we close?

SPEAKER_04 1:32:30

Man, check out my music. Uh I go by Automar, Texas, A-U-D-E-M-A-R, Space T X. So you can follow me on Instagram at Automobiles. Um, I got some music coming up. I'm about to drop some stuff because I'm going to the studio right after this. And uh other than that, man, just make sure you love yourself. That's the most important thing. You can't love nobody unless you love yourself. For sure. I appreciate you for coming on the show, my boy. Thank you for having me, man. Of course.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:54

Till next time.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:55

Peace.