What If Unity Matters More Than Being Right

What if our biggest church fights aren’t about truth, but about taste? We open Romans 14–15 and face the everyday places where convictions collide—food choices, holiday practices, styles, even the trivial stuff that somehow derails our love. Paul’s counsel to the Roman church becomes a roadmap for us: receive the weak without quarrels, refuse to despise or judge, and remember that the person across from you has already been received by God.

We unpack how “put on the Lord Jesus Christ” reframes liberty, conscience, and community. One believer eats, another abstains; one marks a day, another treats every day alike—each unto the Lord, each giving thanks. The point is not uniformity but maturity: deny yourself when your freedom might wound a brother’s conscience, and pursue what makes for peace and mutual upbuilding. Along the way we tackle modern mirrors of ancient debates—technology that can serve or enslave, health choices that differ by person, and the magnetism of petty preferences that scatter fellowship. The warning lands with weight: do not destroy with your food the one for whom Christ died.

If the Kingdom of God is not eating and drinking but righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit, then our priorities must shift. We talk about living and dying to the Lord, the sobering hope of the judgment seat of Christ, and the practical habits that foster unity without diluting conviction. Expect clear teaching, honest stories, and concrete takeaways on how to protect a brother’s conscience, choose love over leverage, and let the gospel—not our preferences—set the tone.

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Come On Up is the radio ministry of The Mountain Cross in Waynesville North Carolina. To learn more about us please visit: TheMountainCross.com.

Chapters

• 26:00 Marker 01

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:05

Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord, to the house of the God of Jacob. He will teach us his ways, and we shall walk in his paths.

SPEAKER_00: 0:13

Welcome to Come On Up, the radio ministry of a Mountain Cross in Waynesville, North Carolina.

SPEAKER_02: 0:20

Do we understand the gospel? How does it play out in our relations with one another? And you know, food is an example of that, but there are other things, you know, like how you hang the toilet paper on the roll. It's obvious that you're unsaved if it's going back toward the wall instead of out the front, right? You don't lose your salvation over the toilet roll, do you? But you know what I'm saying? We quabble about stupid little things instead of glorying in the goodness of our Lord.

SPEAKER_00: 0:51

When someone claims to be saved and be a follower of Christ, everything we do reflects our salvation and our God. It's so important that our habits and responses reflect the new life, the second chance, and the love we've been so graciously given. In today's message, Pastor Carl will challenge you to look at your own choices and how you live day to day. Does it reflect what God has done for you? Are you living in a way that people can clearly see that God has consumed and taken over? And now, here's Pastor Carl.

SPEAKER_02: 1:28

All right, let's get into a study of God's Word. We are in the book of Romans, and today we will be looking at Romans chapter 14 and 15. I think we finally got to the point that Paul was warming everything up to, setting everything up to get to this place at this point, because this is a burden on his heart about how the church in Rome was getting along with each other and not getting along with each other. We wrapped up chapter 13 with this: let us walk properly as in the day, not in revelry or drunkenness, not in lewdness or lust, not in strife or envy, but put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts. Paul is not saying that you need to follow the law, you need to be good. He's gone through many chapters proving that we cannot follow the law. It is the power of the cross that has changed us, that has made us to be free from the law, to be free from sin, and to walk in grace and mercy. But you need to put on the Lord Jesus Christ, you need to look at the gospel, you need to recognize the price that Christ paid for you on the cross and what he's freed you from. Because we do tend to fall back into the flesh as Christians. And so he's making that sure. This is not about do's and don'ts, this is about walking in the power and the grace and the mercy of Jesus Christ, filled with the Holy Spirit, so that we will not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. All right, chapter 14. There have it seemed to be a battle between the Jews and the Greeks that were part of the Roman Church. The Jews, when they became Christians, did not leave their Judaism behind. And they weren't in, you know, they weren't encouraged to. I mean, that's part of the heritage, that's part of where we got here, that's part of the history of how we got to where we are. It's part of the line of the Lord Jesus Christ coming through. And the Jews, when they had potlucks, would be offended when they brought the pork loin in, the Greeks did, or any other unclean food. And there were battles about that. And and this is not right. This is not spiritual. And this is the heart of what Paul wanted to get to. It's not about what you eat, it's not about necessarily how you dress or or how you look. It's about who you know. It's about have you been changed by the gospel? And have others been changed as well. Then we allow the grace of the Lord to work in and through our lives. Let's get into it. Chapter 14, verse 1 receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things. This implies, of course, that everybody he's talking to is mature in their faith, right? Look, when you have arguments with somebody about, you know, little bits and pieces of the word and how to apply it, it's the implication here is that you're so much more spiritual, you're so much more s mature than the other person. The truth is, we all got a lot of growing to do in our faith, right? So receive one another in faith and don't dispute over doubtful things. For one believes that he might eat all things, but he who is weak only eats vegetables. And you could make a doctrine of that saying, don't eat vegetables, because only the strong people eat meat. So you be strong and eat meat. That's not what it's saying, is it? It's saying people have different convictions. The Jews were not going to eat the pork or the lasagna because they weren't sure if the pork was in the lasagna. And so they would just stick with the vegetables. That's what I perceived might have been happening in this situation. Does it make them any less spiritual? Does that make them any less saved? We're talking about believers in Jesus Christ, people that have come to faith in Jesus. They've been born again, and the Holy Spirit is residing in their hearts. And then we start arguing about if you eat pork or not, or if you drink beer or not. Let not him who eats despise who does not eat. And let not him who does not eat judge him who eats. And this is the key. For God has received him. There's plenty of spiritual reasons way we could come up with why you shouldn't eat pork. Or, you know, in my case, I just don't understand how anybody spiritual can eat mushrooms. Because mushrooms are, they're a fungus. How can fungus be clean? It's like a mold. And the Old Testament talks about cleaning out your house of mold. And you eat mushrooms, it doesn't make it easy. Do I need to be arguing about that? Really? Because there are benefits to mushrooms, and it really has nothing to do with my faith in the Lord, does it? I'm okay not to eat mushrooms, and my wife is okay to eat mushrooms. The Lord still loves us. The Lord has received us. If you've come to faith in Jesus Christ, you've been accepted. If your brother or sister has come to faith in Jesus Christ, they've been accepted by the Lord. It's sealed. They are accepted in the beloved because of the cross of Christ and not because of what we do or do not do. Right? So why are we arguing? That is the point that Paul is starting to get to here. Who are you to judge another servant? To his own master, he stands or falls. Indeed, we will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand. He will be able to stand. Now, of course, we're serving the same master, that's the point. Where we're Christians, we're believers in Jesus Christ, and Jesus has changed each of our lives if we are indeed believers in Jesus Christ, right? But my relationship, my my perception, my my experience with the Lord is different than my brother's experience with the Lord. In other words, my brother doesn't need to answer to me. My brother needs to answer to the Lord. I need to answer to the Lord. And what has the Lord said? You're good because of my blood. You're accepted. The Lord was rejected so that we would be accepted. The Lord bled and died and took the wrath upon himself so that we can be whole and healed and right with God. Do we understand the gospel? How does it play out in our relations with one another? And you know, food is an example of that, but there are other things, you know, like how you hang the toilet paper on the roll. It's obvious that you're unsaved if it's going back toward the wall instead of out the front, right? You don't lose your salvation over the toilet roll, do you? But you know what I'm saying? We quabble about stupid little things instead of glorying in the goodness of our Lord and what he's done for us. My wife Florene and I went to a pastor's retreat. We were talking to one of the pastors. You know, people come in and out of church, and we understand that, and this gives me a good opportunity to say, in this church, if God has brought you here and you believe this is your fellowship, you are a member, okay? And we want you to be a part. If ever you've been here and you've been part of what we're doing and you feel that the Lord is moving you away, please don't just leave. Let us pray with you. Because God is at work. We want to be a part and encourage you in what God is doing. And then you go forth. So many people just leave churches for so many different reasons. Um, and I I would beg to differ, I would, I would seem to say that most people that go out of the church don't go because God has told them to leave. It's because of something that they didn't like. And again, now back to my story. We met a pastor at the pastor's retreat, and a man came up to him, and at least the man was honest and told him why they were leaving instead of just leaving. And you go, why in the world did they leave? And he came and he said, Pastor, I don't like a tithe. And he goes, You're leaving because you don't like the tithe. I don't hardly ever talk about the tithe. I mean, that's between you and God and and and and and so forth. And he said, No, no, no, I don't have a problem with the tithe. I'm talking about your tie. I hate your ties. Your ties are ugly. So we're leaving. And I'm not joking. Pastor doesn't wear ties anymore, but but really, Paul's saying, really, are you arguing about the color of your pastor's tie? Does it really matter what the pastor looks like? I mean, we're I I try to clean myself up and look presentable so I'm not a distraction from the word. But we're here to hear the word, aren't we? We're here to grow in the Lord. It's not about the fact that we have a band or not. It's not about if we have a hum in the speaker system like we do or not. It's about coming together as the body of Christ and growing in the word, growing in grace and encouraging each other in the Lord and not nitpicking with each other about the things that they're doing wrong, quote unquote. Right? This is where Paul is going. One person esteems one day above another, another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind. Some people don't, uh, some Christians don't celebrate Christmas because it has pagan origins, pagan roots, and they have a deep conviction about that. Well, that's okay. They're not celebrating it because they want to glorify God. Other Christians, they celebrate Christmas because it's it's the greatest story ever told. It's God becoming a man, and it's the beginning of the salvation story that climaxes at Easter. Of course, we're going to celebrate that because that brings glory to God. If we are serving God, if we are seeking after God and seeking to grow in his grace, it'll play out in different ways in our lives. He who observes the day observes it to the Lord, and he who does not observe the day to the Lord, he does not observe it. We do it because we have a conviction in our relationship with the Lord and we want to please the Lord in all we do. Let them please the Lord in all they do, let them grow in the Lord. You can't be the Holy Spirit in their lives. You can't even be the Holy Spirit in your own life. Let the Lord work. Let's walk in grace. He who eats eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God. And he who does not eat to the Lord, he does not eat and gives God thanks. I don't know. I go to a lot of men's conferences where they where the big deal is the lunch where they have the pulled pork barbecue. Now, I have a conviction against pork, and it's not a religious conviction, it's just a health issue. Um, pork doesn't agree with me, and so I avoid it. But it's interesting, you know, we put so much effort into we have the freedom to eat this pork and praise God, go at it. As long as you receive it with thanksgiving and ask for God's blessing on it, more power to you. But there are other things that we eat that we know that aren't good for us, and some of them it affects us differently than others. Um, and so we know personally these things that we eat will affect us, and we want to be good stewards of our bodies. It's the temple of the Holy Spirit. So we're careful not to partake of those things, but we don't pass judgment on those that do, or we shouldn't, right? This is what Paul's trying to get at. We do it to the glory of God. For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself. If indeed we are Christians, if indeed we are believers in Jesus Christ and have been changed, we become new creations. We are now servants of God. We used to be slaves to sin, and now we are bond servants to Jesus Christ. And as we grow in the Lord and realize that his grace working in and through us, it's our desire to glorify him in all that we do. And so none of us lives because of our own lives anymore. And none of us dies to himself. Paul in another place says, to live is Christ, and to die is gain. My life is all about Jesus in the here and now and forever. But if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's. Is it your primary heart, your primary goal, to glorify God with your life? To know God, to walk with God, to be loved by God and to love Him in return, and then serve the brethren to love one another in Christ. For to this end Christ died and rose and lived again that he might be both Lord of the dead and the living. Jesus is our Savior. And if we die, we've gained Christ. And as we live, we're living for Christ, in Christ. May He be the Lord of our lives and all of our all that we do, and may not our flesh get in the way of our relationships with one another. But why do you judge your brother? Why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. He's bringing in the master again. Uh I'm responsible before the Lord, not before others that come and nitpick about me. And those that I nitpick to, trying to help. The Lord does so much better job. Let's point to Jesus. Let's point each other to Jesus because we will stand before the Lord as it is written, as I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God. This is a verse that sounds like another verse that every tongue shall confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. This is a different verse that says, We will confess to God what we have done. As he says in verse 12, so each of us shall give account of himself to God. We will be giving an account for our lives. And the Lord will, you know, burn away the staff and the what is it, the straw and the wheat and the chaff is going to be burned away, and the precious metals and stones that are the works of Jesus in and through our lives, those things will remain. Therefore, let us not judge any uh one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or to cause to fall in our brother's way. Paul is saying, you're trying to help by saying these things to your brothers and your sisters, and you're flaunting your freedom, your liberties, but you're not helping them along in their grace, in the freedom, in the liberties that God has given us. In fact, you're you're causing them to stumble and to doubt their faith and maybe even walk away from the Lord. We don't want people to walk away from the Lord. We want people to stand strong in his grace and his mercy and show it to one another. Verse 14 I know and am convinced by the Lord Jesus that there is nothing unclean of itself, but to him who considers anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean. We have personal convictions about stuff that have been a stumbling block in our in our walk in the Lord, and so we avoid these things. If I'm forced to do something that I feel is wrong, that's going to be a stumbling block for me. Cell phones. One of the worst evils today, right? Yet one of the greatest tools we've been ever given. Do we destroy them all? I think it's almost impossible at this point for us to do without technology. I couldn't do my work without technology. We couldn't have what we're doing without technology. But it's what we do with it. It's the heart that we put into it. Does it become an idol? Does it become a distraction for us? Then it becomes sin. But the phone itself is not good or bad. It's not clean or unclean, right? Yet if your brother is grieved because of your food, you're no longer walking in love. And this is where we get mixed up. We think we're walking in powerful faith. When we walk in our liberties, I have the freedom to eat this pork sandwich. And I don't care what you think because, well, you're you've got smaller faith than I do, and I'm going to show you what a man of God does. He says, Thank you, Jesus, and he takes a bite of the thing. Instead of putting yourself into your brother's shoes and understanding there's a background here. At the Church of Rome, it was Jews and Gentiles that have come to faith in Jesus Christ. And the Jews have a deep, deep love for the word and for the dietary restrictions that they've been given, which in fact most of the time are healthy restrictions, but it's not a matter of salvation, is it? And if we force our way upon our brothers, because it is our way, we're not forcing the liberty of Christ. We're forcing what we perceive to be our liberties on them, and we cause them to stumble. And we have to give an account for that. Why did you make your brothers stumble instead of encouraging them in the Lord? And instead of denying yourself a little bit. I choose not to partake of this because I know what it's going to do for my brother. I want to lift up my brother. I want to strengthen my brother. My brother is more important than me at this moment. May the Lord give us that perspective. May the Lord give us that heart. Do not destroy with your food the one for whom Christ died. Ouch! Look back at the cross. What did he do for you? He took your sin away as far as the east is from the west. He took your brothers away as well. You are free indeed. But not free to cause your brother to stumble. Is taking that food so important to you, you're willing to trip out your brother, whom the Lord died for. And you say, Yeah, brother, I'm going to come with you. When you're invited in, we come in and start talking about stuff. But if you're not invited in and you start saying stuff, you're causing troubles and you're bringing people away from a relationship with you and bringing people away from a relationship with the Lord. May it not be said among us. Therefore, do not let your good be spoken of as evil. For the kingdom of God is not about eating or drinking, but about righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. We live in a fallen world. Our bodies are disintegrating. And yet the Lord has given us life. He has given us his righteousness. Have you pondered on that lately? We were wretched sinners, and he gave us his righteousness, and with that, he gives us his peace. We are right with God because of Christ on the cross, and we can rest in that. And that brings a joy in our lives that's unspeakable. It's not a happy, happy, but it's a joy, it's a deep peace, knowing that we are right with the Lord. And whatever comes my way, I can stand and say thank you, Jesus. And it's because it's real, the Holy Spirit is with us.

SPEAKER_00: 24:07

Thanks for listening to today's edition of Come On Up. Pastor Carl of the Mountain Cross has been taking us through a study in the book of Romans. Did you know that the Apostle Paul wrote this letter to those who lived in Rome and who had begun a church there? He was encouraging them to keep the faith, not compromising with the culture around them. The practices that were going on at that time were ungodly and against the morals that God established. Roman gods were worshipped, these false idols that had no power or authority. Sexuality was subjective and was going in all kinds of directions that go opposite to what God created between man and woman. As you listen to some of the corruption that was going on in that society, it may not sound very far off from what's going on today. When people stay rooted and grounded in God's Word, it leads them to the truth and the pure understanding of everything God created and why. But when you lean into popular opinion for the sake of not offending, it quickly leads you astray from what God created in the first place. You can find all of the messages in this series on our website. It's themountaincross.com and look for Bible studies. The Mountain Cross is a group of believers in Jesus who seek to grow in faith by simply teaching the Bible verse by verse, chapter by chapter. We meet on Sundays at the Smoky Mountains Cinema in Waynesville, beginning at 10 a.m. If you'd like to learn more about us, go to themountaincross.com. Come on up is sponsored by the Mountain Cross, a Calvary Chapel fellowship.