Bucket Lists vs. Dreams: Turning Vision Boards into Action

Andrea Wormley, co-host Kelli Moorer, and guest Melissa Benson discuss bucket lists and dreams, defining a dream as a “compass” and a bucket list as the “itinerary” of steps to get there. They challenge the idea that finishing a bucket list means life is over, emphasizing creating new “buckets,” using vision boards, and distinguishing real intentions from fantasies by taking action and writing goals down. Each shares bucket list items—Kelli wants to travel to Italy and attend the Olympics, Melissa envisions a family compound with community outreach, and Andrea describes dreams of training, shelter, and business placement to help others and also traveling to Nigeria to trace her diaspora. They highlight preparation, flexibility, timing, accountability, and overcoming dream killers, and encourage listeners to connect with others, clarify their “why,” keep dreaming, and surround themselves with nurturing dreamers.

00:00 Welcome and Subscribe
00:45 Bucket Lists vs Dreams
01:38 Why Buckets Never End
02:37 Vision Boards and Categories
04:55 Personal Bucket Examples
07:29 From Dream to Action
13:06 Big Dreams Take Time
15:16 Preparation and Persistence
18:05 Podcast Dream Realized
19:49 Stay Flexible With Dreams
21:26 Golf Club Story Twist
23:34 Braver Self Challenge
24:13 Tracing Ancestry Roots
25:09 Nigeria Journey Dream
26:07 Stepping Into Bravery
28:37 Walking Enslaved History
32:00 Claiming Bucket Goals
33:06 Building A Business
35:32 Earning The Doctorate
38:18 Owning Not Working
40:25 Finding Your Why
47:33 Connection Over Isolation
49:49 Final Takeaways And Wrap

Transcript

SPEAKER_06 0:00

So I've always thought of a bucket list as being something the wildest dreams are things that you wanted to experience, but you never allowed yourself to imagine possible. So your bucket list, those things that are in your bucket list, those dreams that are, I don't care what it is, it could be something that is ministry, or it could be something that's just ministering to you. I want to go on a vacation. R-N-R. Whatever it is, if it is a dream that you have that has hit you, um, depending on how heavy it is. But my question to you is what are you doing to get there? Or is this just a fantasy? Because to me, that ain't even a fantasy.

SPEAKER_01 0:45

I truly want to die every day. I don't want there to be anything left in me. I want to pour out to others. I want to give to others. I want so that when it's when my time is and expiration is up, I know I've done everything that I can do to help and give everyone else.

SPEAKER_06 1:31

We are her presence. I am Andrea Warmley, and I have my co-host, uh Kelly Moore. I'm laughing because the last episode I gave her my last name. So I was like Moore. So Kelly Moore, and then we have Melissa Vinson. Um, so welcome, thank you again. Um, make sure that you share, make sure that you subscribe, make sure that you are um uh, you know what? We are on YouTube, we are on Spotify, Apple, all the major uh podcast platforms, all uh the social medias, TikTok, even. Um, so please make sure that you go there and subscribe. All right, so today we are going to be talking about bucket lists, bucket lists and dreams. Um, and so before we go forward, because I know we needed to find what is what does that mean? So I think you had a definition you was like, hurry up.

SPEAKER_05 2:32

So I don't forget. So I would say a dream is your compass. Okay. Okay. Your compass. What do you want to move forward to? And I would say your bucket list would be the itinerary.

SPEAKER_03 2:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 2:48

I love that. So I want to travel more. And my itinerary is gonna be all the different places that I want to go to. Okay. And when that bucket gets almost empty, I gotta create more places to go to.

SPEAKER_01 3:06

I love it.

SPEAKER_05 3:07

Because you you you you made a comment about that one.

SPEAKER_01 3:09

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 3:10

But what's somebody telling you about that bucket list?

SPEAKER_01 3:13

You know, sometimes when you're saying, oh my, oh my bucket list, I got, and I someone said to me, I bucket list, why you got a bucket list? Once you finish everything on that list, is your life over? The bucket is over the bucket. No, kicking the bucket. It's just like what you said though. It's a dream in the itinerary. I love that. I love that.

SPEAKER_06 3:38

And I said when you were telling us that earlier, I'm like, mm-mm, because I got a lot of buckets. A bucket covenant is done. It's just like purses, right? Exactly. How many purses we got? And then I'll buy a purse. Come on. And it'll be big, you know, because I need more room, and then now I don't have any room. Like, okay, let me get you get another purse. So uh nah. And there's some persons I'm not gonna kick. I can feel that back up again. Come on, keep it, keep it rolling. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:05

So, what what is your definition though? I agree. Um, I didn't have that definition that Kelly had, but it is. It is everything that I can imagine and want to achieve and do. I mean, it it doesn't even have to be I have mine in different categories: professional list, travel list, just my wildest dreams list, you know. So it's whatever. And as I'm going along, as I'm achieving those things, that's why I like vision boards. So we'll keep talking about it it's it's almost your bucket list, it's almost your dream vision board. Yeah. It's all the things that you want to do.

SPEAKER_06 4:52

Yeah. Wow. So I've always thought of a bucket list as being something the wildest dreams or things that you wanted to experience, but you never allowed yourself to imagine possible. That's what I thought, you know, that's what I've always thought a bucket list to be. So, like, for example, now it's funny because I'm about to say this because this is when I was younger. I dreamed this. Um But now I f I feel I feel like you know it's obtainable. But then I didn't. It I I always wanted to have a big house with a lot of rooms so that I can put adoptees in it. When I was real, when I was young, you know, put all the adoptees in, you know. And I feel like, you know, the reason why I say it's something that's obtainable, it may not look exactly like that, but I really feel like it's obtainable to get a bunch of invest in a bunch of houses and put some folks in there that feel like they nobody sees them.

SPEAKER_03 5:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 5:59

That they need to be accepted, they need to feel acceptable, that they need to understand that we do see you, you know. Hence adoptees, you know. Uh you are adopted into this right here. We see you. So that for me is what a bucket list is. And once it's done, you already know when you start doing stuff, then that you start adding stuff.

SPEAKER_05 6:22

Right, right.

SPEAKER_06 6:23

Yeah. So, okay, so bucket list. Can you, you know, sometimes it's hard. Name one thing that's on your bucket list that you haven't done yet, Kelly. Go, Kelly. One thing on your bucket list that you want to do. And the reason why I want us, uh the reason why I want us to do that is because I'm hoping at the end of this episode or maybe in another season, we bring this back up and say, Did you do that thing? Did it happen? Yeah. I want to bring, you know how I am. I want to bring accountability now. What you gonna do? How do you do that? You know, okay, so one thing, anybody go.

SPEAKER_05 7:06

My bucket list the item is Italy. Okay, is Italy. You just went there for the anniversary, and I want to be there for two weeks. Okay, because I want the full experience. Um that is on my bucket list. That one and the Olympics, which which we're that one's that one's gonna come fruition because I'm on that first draft of tickets.

SPEAKER_04 7:31

So, we have to go what we're gonna see, what we want to see. Olympics, okay, okay, okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:40

Melissa. So it kind of my bucket list kind of reminds me of yours. Um, I want to have a family compound. Girl, yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 7:51

Yes, yep. Let me tell you how to figure it out.

SPEAKER_01 7:58

At the entrance of the compound is this big, beautiful church, so that everybody can come and gather. And then you've got the area for all of the gatherings, like a community center and all of that. And then you have all the houses of my mom and my sisters, and whomever wants to be in this little compound. Is it whoever? Everybody got their own little house, and then we have the rec center for you can come and swim and tennis and basketball and movies. Even Willie went there. I love it.

SPEAKER_05 8:35

I love it. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

But it becomes a and then we take that and we do outreach. So the church is just not for the family, it's for the community. And we give and we have a giving closet and a food storage and all these. Yep. So that's what's so much.

SPEAKER_05 8:54

She's gonna make you make that happen.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

But come on, girl. Come on.

SPEAKER_06 8:58

Because I'm about to ask some questions. Oh, so you are. I know. I know. And the question is, what do you have to do to get there?

SPEAKER_01 9:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:05

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 9:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 9:06

What do you have to, and you really need to write that down. Write it down and make it plain. How are you going to get that? Like, is that just a dream that is a fantasy? Or is it a dream that you want to really because to me, a bucket list is not just fantasies. Right, right. A bucket list is I'm doing it. And I think that that's also the difference, right? Like, I have this bucket that I'm carrying around, and it represents stuff that I think about all the time and kind of plan it out. And when I'm just kind of, you know, sitting down in my chair, and I have a moment to myself, like, and I want to add this to it. Ooh, this is and these colors, ooh, and that's gonna be nice right there. You know, this that's your bucket, right? So what are you gonna do, Kelly? Okay.

SPEAKER_05 9:57

So my bucket list, and I I should have defined it a little bit more. It's not just me, it's my family. It's the whole family. So um that's the daddies and the brothers, and and and then we can add some friends along too. Um so it is on my vision board. Um, and I have some action steps that I have to take um to make that a reality. And I'm in the process of doing that. But this it's that action, um, the vision board that is helping me to create those those steps.

SPEAKER_06 10:31

Okay. It's the the vision board. The vision board.

SPEAKER_05 10:33

And you do a vision board every year? I do a vision board every year and I update it every quarter.

SPEAKER_06 10:38

Okay, okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 10:40

I mean, it's updated, but I look at it heavily every quarter to see if I've made those those marks.

SPEAKER_06 10:46

And so you've made steps towards that. Yes. Have you made steps towards your compound?

SPEAKER_01 10:51

I have not, but you know what? Mm-hmm. I believe, first of all, you have to be able to see it. Right. So I can see it. You see it. It's it's clear. It's there, is there. And I didn't even mention too, it would have a um, because I have family members who are aging. So this compound would have our own care facility for those aging family members. Wow. Because I don't want to put, as we talked about, nursing homes and things like that. I want to be able to bring that on that compound so that people can be cared for around their loved ones and you're not all scattered all across the US trying to make sure someone has been taken care of. Wow. Yeah. So I believe you gotta be able to see it first. You gotta be able to see it. But no, haven't taken the steps to do it. But I guess I could say one way of taking the steps is being financially sound because none of that comes to pass if you don't have your finances in order. Right. So that is something I'm constantly working on is trying to build wealth. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 12:04

I can say clearly not. All right. So I like what you said, and I want to say also that if your bucket list does require funds, and just don't let that stop you because there's grants, there's all sorts of funding, especially if you're gonna help the community or you know, so there's so many ways to make that happen. Um, so I told you what my childhood bucket was to do that, but since then it's kind of expanded itself. You know, my husband and I, we we used to lay in bed and it wasn't a fantasy, it was a dream. Like we want to do this, this, this. So we want to be able to uh so you know how the man was sitting on the side of the church and he had his little can and Peter said, Well, silver and gold I don't have, but what I have to I'll freely give you, right? And then that thing, what and then what they gave him was a relationship with God, but it strengthened his ankles. Um, so back in the day when my husband and I would just like lay in a bed and dream about stuff, we want to do that. We want to um be able to train, whether it be us or someone coming in, bring those people in, and and there's a training that's happening, and then there's a placement, there's shelter, um, and and you're working in businesses that we have, and that is an opportunity for you to network and meet the very person that you needed to meet to go across the bridge to do the thing, you know what I'm saying? And to be able, so like when we were back in the day dreaming about that, and it is past our wildest dreams, right? Now it's like, hmm, we could do that. Yeah. And so now, you know, like I asked you, like, what what steps, you know, and like you said, I like how you said, you know, well, we can see it, we're just trying to, you know. But now then we got to a place where we started to write it down, and what does that look like? And how does that feel? And what do we need to get that? And all those kind of things. And a lot of times when your bucket list list is big, it may take a while, right? And sometimes you can't get discouraged on that, right? Because it's like when people be like, well, so so so so is your coffee shop ready yet? Well, you know, you can't feel like, man, you know, it's no, I was hoping that it would be done by now, but it's not. And God has to always remind me, but it's because of the impact. And it can't be rushed 100%. It has a timing, yes, right, to it. So your bucket list, those things that are in your bucket list, those dreams that are, I don't care what it is, it could be something that is ministry, or it could be something that's just ministering to you. I want to go on a vacation. R and R. Minister. R and R. You have to make that. Yes, it is. Whatever it is, if it is a dream that you had that had that has hit you, um, depending on how heavy it is. But my question to you is, what are you doing to get there? Or is this just a fantasy? Because to me, that ain't even a bucket list. That shouldn't even, you know what I'm saying? That's just like I'm fantasizing stuff. I ain't gonna never do it. I was talking to somebody the other day and she was telling me that there, uh, and I never even thought about that. The difference between like what a fantasy really is. It's not really something that you intend to do. It's just, I'm just gonna be daydreaming. Yeah, yeah. So that's that you know, think about that. Is what you so-called have on your bucket list, is it a fantasy? Because if it's not a fantasy, then what are you doing to get there? I mean, honestly, is the compound a fantasy? No. So let me start. Is is going to be serious. Right. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Is going to the Olympics just a fantasy? And I'm just saying, like, ooh, I wish I could go. And if I went, I would be sitting over here. I need to go. Yeah. You know, so I think that that is really important. What thoughts? That's on what uh on that.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

I would say, as you were talking about the the coffee shop and things like that. I believe this everything does not have, as you mentioned, it's about impact, but it's also about preparation.

SPEAKER_06 17:00

That power, the journey.

SPEAKER_01 17:02

Every part of the the weight is preparing. You may try to, well, why is this delayed, or why is that delayed, or why is this? Because it's a lesson in each little area. Sometimes we get so caught on the destination that we forget all about the stories and the lessons in the journey, and getting there quick.

SPEAKER_05 17:25

And getting there quick, not run, but walk through it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:29

But the the dream is there for a reason. It's there for a reason, man. And I so I look, I was like, with Bible study, here, come out, come out, mask him. David was identified as the king. Yes, he was. When he was in the shepherd field. The dream was there. He was anointed, he was appointed. Yeah, it was for him. Yeah, but it was many years later before he actually had the physical crown. Sometimes it's all about killing the lions and the tigers and the bears so that when you got here, Goliath was not an issue. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 18:17

That one little stone.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

Come on. It's all is preparation for your journey. Just keep dreaming and believing that it's gonna happen. Don't give up on your dreams. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 18:30

And just being your authentic self from the present. Like sometimes people will be like, you know, well, didn't you say that you they didn't you had a dream? Didn't you say, you know, didn't what's you know, yes, and being authentic and being okay with saying, but this is what's going on. Because some people need to hear that. Yeah, they need to know that some things are not quick. No, some things are not overnight. No. Some things, most things. Most things that are of substance. Right. Take time. Take time. And most things that are of substance needs an authentic self to move through it, right? And so that's really good. Yeah. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 19:16

And many people hate to share their dreams, right? Because of dream killers. Let me tell you something.

SPEAKER_06 19:21

Because growth that is within me that is anything. I don't even understand it. I don't understand how anybody can take any dream from me. Okay, I'm sorry. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_05 19:34

We're gonna get started. Let's talk about the person.

SPEAKER_04 19:41

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 19:45

And the bucket list is the itinerary, all the steps that we have done even before we even got here. I know, I know somebody was creating a whole bunch of uh steps. I was just using my vision board, I was using my vision board. But um we got, you know, and love their understanding because I know they're like but um but here we are, here we are.

SPEAKER_01 20:12

You know, I just pulled out a vision board from 2024. And what is on there? Podcast for women.

SPEAKER_05 20:23

Mine was 2020. It's in my bedroom. Mine was 2020.

unknown 20:28

Wow.

SPEAKER_06 20:29

Yeah, wow, and when you look at it, you're like, right? Wow, here we are, and here we are. Yeah, yeah. And then like you talk about the journey, like the journey you, you know, you have we the podcast was in your po in your bucket list, and you had it on your shoulder, and you just carrying it around, you know. And then maybe you had conversations and you're like, ooh, that'll be a good topic for, you know. Yes. And then all of a sudden, it happens, right? And suddenly, and it's not really incidentally, but it is incidentally, right? Because you because sometimes you're like, well, okay. And then suddenly, you know, it comes together. And then the other thing about a bucket list is when it does happen, enjoying the journey again. And not um uh what is the word? Uh uh don't sometimes we have our expectations of what it should look like, which is good. I mean, because we should plan, but always leave room for the molding of it. Be pliable, right? So that you can enjoy. Because if you're not pliable, then it's gonna be a hard road. You have to be you have to give yourself permission to be. Flexible. Flexible and you know, and and move there's another word I'm trying to think of.

SPEAKER_01 22:05

When you were saying I was thinking morphing, because this thing can go into so many different ways. You may have one thought of how things are going to go, even with my whole family compound. Who knows what that could become? You know, so don't put yourself in a box with your dream.

SPEAKER_05 22:31

And it's so tight that you can't expand.

SPEAKER_01 22:34

You can expand.

SPEAKER_05 22:34

You know? I had a vision, you had a vision, and then we all come together and it's been expanded. Yes. Into something, it's it's become something bigger than we even thought that this probably could be, possibly could be. Yeah. The flexibility of it.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

Be flexible. It reminds me of a story.

SPEAKER_05 22:57

Let me hear the story. Let me hear the story because you got good stories.

SPEAKER_01 23:00

There was this king who loved to play golf. You probably heard this story before. Not yet, anyway. So he loved to play golf. So he invited one of the world-renowned golf players to come over to his castle and all of this and in his country and play golf with him. And they had such an amazing time. The king said to the uh golfer, he said, Hey, I've enjoyed the time with you. What can I give you? Because I want to bless you. And the guy was like, the golfer was like, I had a good time too. Um, you know what? I'll just take a golf club. That'll be fine. And so the he gets back to the US and he's, you know, waiting a couple of weeks and he's thinking to myself, huh, I wonder what this golf club is gonna look like. Is it gonna be gold plated? Is it gonna be silver plated? We'll have my name engraved on it. What will it be? Weeks pass, months passed. And he's like, Man, I ain't got my golf club yet. The king said he's gonna give me a golf club. I'm waiting on it. Huh. Months pass, even more. He's still waiting. I guess I guess he forgot. I guess I'm gonna get the golf club, but it's all good. I had a good time anyways. A letter comes in the mail. He opens the letter. It's a deed, not for a golf club, but a golf club. You see? When we talk about dreams, we may have one thing in mind, but our king, our father, who put the dream inside of us, has way bigger plans than we can ever think or imagine that he will do for us.

SPEAKER_05 24:54

That is awesome.

SPEAKER_01 24:55

This podcast is just one of those dreams. Love it. Where can it go?

SPEAKER_06 25:01

Wow. So, okay, so I have a question. Yeah. I usually when I ask questions that, yes, yeah, I love okay.

SPEAKER_05 25:08

She's gonna answer her own question first.

SPEAKER_06 25:10

Oh, okay. Uh, what is one experience? Because we have many. We just talked about that earlier. What is one experience that you want to have that's in your bucket list, but it's going to cause you to have to step into a braver version of yourself? And so I'll answer first because you always gotta leave the coin. A braver version of yourself. Um, so one of the things in my bucket list is um, so year a f some years ago, uh, I found out that I I always knew I was um uh Blackfoot. Um that's in my family. And but I found out that uh I'm from Nigeria and East Asia, which is weird. I at the time I thought it was weird, but in research I found out that uh East Asia is Cherokee, Blackfoot is a Cherokee. Blackfoot is also a coined name for the black faced Cherokees that mixed with Nigerians. So Okay, that's neat. And so I have been researching and going doing deep dives into that, right? That's like whole, whole other kind of stuff than came out, right? But one of the things I want to do is go to Nigeria, and I want to go to Nigeria and follow the diaspora of my people. Um, that is not a fantasy, that's something I want to do. But I do feel like that that is going I have to step into a braver self because of what that might bring on, you know, as we walk uh this journey uh from there to you know to America, to Arkansas, how we got there, all that kind of stuff, you know. I wanna walk it, physically walk it. Um, and so I know for a fact, like even when I think about it, I'm excited, but it's a bittersweet, like it's gonna be some, I'm going to, we really are gonna have to be in prayer um to do that journey. Yeah, what about y'all? I mean, a braver self, what do you have to do? Or what experience, if any, maybe there's not one, if any, where you have to step into um a new braver self, a stronger self.

SPEAKER_01 27:52

I will say for me, is there are dreams and imagines and things that I can only imagine that I want to do beyond that compound and everything, but it's gonna cause me to step out of my comfort zone of security in the sense of being more vulnerable and sharing myself with others, even the places that I don't want everyone to see because that is how you truly reach and connect people. And I'm one of those people that I like things a certain way, and I'm gonna have to let that go. And I know that's a part of me stepping into that bravery is letting go of the part of me that needs everything to be, I'll use the military term, dress right, dress. I have to shed that off, and that is a prayer for me daily. It doesn't have to be dress right dress, shed it, release it so that you can do your God-given purpose, your God given those dreams and desires. You can get there, but it's gonna take you to consume all of that other stuff that's holding you back. Yeah, that's good. That's good. That's that's just mine.

SPEAKER_05 29:27

Yeah, yeah, that's really good. Um, mine's a combination. I gone through some of that and have been going through some of that um in the last couple years, um, shedding some stuff, having to shed some stuff. Um I don't know if it was a bucket list, but the dream was to let go. And then how do I let go?

SPEAKER_03 29:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 29:50

And what is that gonna look like? Um, and is there trusted people that you can have those kind of conversations with? So I oh I get it, I get it. Um, mine is a couple of years ago, I think um when Gabriel Union turned 50, she took a trip to Africa and um she wanted to explore. Um, I'm gonna kind of paraphrase it. It's the the the slave uh ships and how, you know, the tribes that we were in and how the selling and the capturing and then going through the last tunnel before you leave your uh Africa, your homeland, and you're going now into the ships. Um, I watched that a couple of times, um, and I didn't know how I that's a journey that I would I want to take. Don't, you know, not love, but want to take and want to put myself, strip myself bare and walk in their shoes. The kings and the queens and the beauty of who we we are or who we were, and then being taken from your homeland, from your family on these ships. And we know we've heard many tales about what the ships were like and the close by close and on top of each other, and many didn't make it, and um, and then coming into this country.

SPEAKER_01 31:26

Wow, the whole journey. Yeah, you just made me think of something. I was talking to someone, um, I was on a cruise, and we were I was talking to a lady who was from either UK or I can't remember exactly where she was from, but it was she was from Europe, and she used the term African American and American. And the way she used it kind of threw me off a minute, like why wouldn't you just say because she was comparing me to someone else? And I thought, wait a minute, why wouldn't you just say Americans? Why am I African American? So I as you were mentioning that story, I'm thinking what we see here is different. How not all, but other countries perceive those who have come over and all so it's when you're saying that it's just I can visualize exactly what you're saying your dream is. I can visualize it, and I can see being stripped of all of that physical deity and royalty, knowing it's still on the inside, you know who you are. That's an amazing dream. Yeah, and I I man just to know that whole and it ties in with yours because we were a people before we were brought over. Right. So that's resilience, yeah. Oh yeah, that's resilience.

SPEAKER_05 33:13

And and let me uh correct, it's the enslaved, not the slave, but the enslaved that was against their wisdom and their wishes.

SPEAKER_06 33:22

Wow. Awesome.

SPEAKER_01 33:23

That's good.

SPEAKER_06 33:24

Okay, so that went deep. Yeah, that went deep. Okay, this might be a little deep too. Uh-oh. So you can either take one of the ones that we've that you've talked about, uh, or another one, but think about a bucket, uh, something that you have on your in your bucket, in one of your buckets, bucket list. Um and what will it mean, or what did it mean when you claimed it and what will it mean, or did it mean when it manifests? When you claimed it, and then when it manifests or when it manifests, it's okay. Okay. You you oh, you already got one. Go.

SPEAKER_05 34:10

I do, I do, I do. I do on that one.

SPEAKER_06 34:13

Um so what did it what did it feel like? Is it something that you've already done? Okay, what did it feel like when you claimed it before it manifested? Or it can somebody define when I say claim, can somebody tell me what what I what do you think I mean by that?

SPEAKER_05 34:29

I I I would say where you this could be me, this is me, this is what I'm gonna do, this is going to be what I'm doing. Um, mine was my business. And I started my, I'm gonna be honest with you, I really started planning my business in 2013. If you see the number of vision boards, and my vision boards were different, they were even action, I mean, literally action boards, insurance, you know, business name, EIN, business structure, supply. I mean, it was the whole nine yards because I knew I wasn't gonna start a business overnight. It had to be done right. Um, taxes, sales tax. Um, and I wanted to make sure that when I said I am done and I can walk away, I was going to be ready to walk away. And that is what I did. Um I got all that together, got all that accomplished, and then in 2018, I got the business registered. In 2019, I went live.

SPEAKER_06 35:42

And what did that mean to you?

SPEAKER_05 35:44

Freedom. Freedom. Um it it it was freedom. It was freedom. Um, I was suffocating. It gave me new life, it gave me new meeting. Um, yeah, you know, I don't have the protection of a a corporate, but I made sure I learned, asked questions, took courses. Um, I was I wanted to make sure I was prepared, and I was. Um that, but I did that one year, 2019, I networked. I just networked. 2020, we went live during COVID. And COVID was nothing different than what I knew um to do in in a healthcare environment. Yeah, and we knew how to how to kill. Um, and so a lot of companies and a lot of individuals wanted us to come and and provide that type of cleaning. So wow. Or come in and also manage the process. So it just gave me freedom.

SPEAKER_06 36:52

Freedom and life.

SPEAKER_05 36:53

Freedom and life.

SPEAKER_06 36:54

Wow. Yeah. That's good. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 36:56

What about you?

SPEAKER_01 36:58

Is there as you were given the dates? I thought about I'm like, oh my gosh. So mine was my doctorate. I started in 2013, had to stop, started, stopped, started, and again, it was always there. It was always on that board. It was always on the board of my mind. You're gonna do it. And then I had family members who would do that accountability. Did you finish? Where are you? And it's like, okay, all right, I appreciate it. And what does it feel like to complete? My father used to always say this education is something no one can take from you. It's in you. They can take a title, they can take positions, but the knowledge you gain is yours.

SPEAKER_05 37:57

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 37:58

So it gave me it, and it was a it was a pride of accomplishment. You have done it. No matter how long it took, you didn't give up. You did it. So it's a good feeling. Wow.

SPEAKER_05 38:16

I like that.

SPEAKER_01 38:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 38:18

And you're among the top elite for doctorates.

SPEAKER_03 38:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 38:22

Yes. But you're among that is um educated black women. Because you have your masters. Yeah, I have my master's. So all right. Yeah, there you go.

SPEAKER_01 38:40

Y'all said we grew up. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 39:38

You miss the video. Oh, she for real. Wow. Okay, so for me, um, so I've claimed it already, and I've yet is yet to completely manifest. Um, so I want to pop myself off the top of uh a couple of uh uh businesses that I have. So I'm a realtor and I'm also uh a bookkeeper. So um I have some plans where I'll still be there, but I just want to just be owning it. I don't want to be working in it. Gotcha. Um, and what does that mean for me? Even when I when I began to claim it, it was already freeing. Right.

SPEAKER_03 40:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 40:36

But the whole reason why I wanted to step into entrepreneurship is because I wanted to move when I got ready. I wanted to be able to step away when I got ready, you know. Not ask permission. Right. And uh, and although it does take time, when you start a business, you do need to be working in it. You need to make sure that your vision is um um seen by those that you are uh giving jobs to, which was a a dream of mine, also to give jobs to people. Um, but now I need them people that had a job and let this thing run like a well or machine. So when that manifests, then what that will mean to me is I'm moving when I get ready. I'm I can be remote, I can go and do and you know, and the things, the dreams that God, the other dreams that God has dropped on me, I can do that. I can be excited about it and you know what I'm saying, and not feel like, you know, we're still waiting on it because we're you know what I'm saying, I can't go and I can't be in two places at one time, right? So um, yeah, so that's what freedom. I wonder when we talk about just even the compound and and uh going to uh Venice and going to see the uh to Africa and going to see the the ships and all the ones that we mentioned, right? Right. What when that manifests, what is it going to like why do you even want to do that? Like think about that. Why do you want to do it? Why do you think that that had downloaded on you? Why do you want to do that? And I and I and not that you necessarily have to answer that, I'm just saying it to us and then those that are listening, because you can't forget the first love. Like you have to, and whatever that is, you might you got your bucket list, you might want to put beside it, and this is why, so that you can stay focused on the reason that you're doing this, especially when it becomes tedious, where you know, you start feeling overwhelmed by stuff or tedious, or maybe you get off track and you see the reason. That is my why. There's a book, I think it's called The Why. Um, that is my why. Let me stay focused on, and you start saying, it feels good to be able to do whatever that why is. It feels good to be able to walk in freedom. It feels good to be able to give jobs to others that can hold my vision and my my vision of what this is, what it is. And it is a well-all machine. It feels good that jobs are given to people, and the best thing you can do is allow somebody else to do the thing that you used to do, right? It feels good to see that your mark is there the way God has purposed that thing to be. It feels good to whatever it is, to know my heritage. To under I understand who I am more. Now I it's not a fantasy anymore, it is something that I I really I I smelt the air. I walked on the very ground. It I I have a new identity. Or I I shouldn't say a new idea. I have a discovered, another discovered identity of mine. You know what I mean? Yeah. So I don't know if y'all wanna comment on how yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:22

For me, when you say the why of it, it's because it's something of who I am. I like taking care of people. I I love you mentioned being a giver. I like doing for others. And it's always been bigger than me because someone helped me along the way. Someone has given to me. I just want to return whatever that is back. I I always say I heard this term and I I it just have stuck with me. I truly want to die empty. I don't want there to be anything left in me. I want to pour out to others, I want to give to others. I want so that when it's when my time is of expiration is up, I know I've done everything that I could do to help and give everyone else. That's that's just my dream and my why. And for that whole compound and all of that. Because I believe I, you know how you can see gifts in others and you can see the things that they could do, but many times it's just because of the lack of resources that people can't live their wildest dreams. I can see it in my siblings, the entrepreneurship and the uh I have a brother who has he's starting his clothing line and all these things, but all he needs is more resources because the dream and the desire is there. So I I I just want to help you get over that hill. Come on, you got it. I see it, I see it with you. So for me, that's the why, because I've been given so much. So I want to give back to others. That's good. Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_06 46:17

Okay, wow. Um, you know, uh I I I I did write some things down for the why, you know, um a lot of the things that are probably on most of people's bucket list, even if you feel like it's a selfish thing, it probably still fits in some of these. Um the bucket list to when it manifests it will help you connect to um people you love the most. Somehow it's going to do that. Uh the freedom or the compound or the whatever, right? Um it is something that maybe you want people to remember or you remember decades from now, that people are still talking about. And I can't remember I I remember if you or you're talking about how like years from now, I wonder how my great grandkids are going to what they're gonna say when they look at this episode, say that was my great grandkids. That's the first thought that came out the first thought when we look at each other like, yeah. We're like, what and hopefully they say she was cute. And hopefully they say something like, Oh my goodness. And granny actually did that thing that she talked about. Yes, you know, here are the pictures, you know, here are the receipts. So, yeah, so um decades from now, um leave behind an impact on the community. An impact on the community. Like when you look at all the things that's on your bucket list, or maybe even things that you didn't put down on your bucket list, but it just happened because it's you, it's it's who you are, it's your authentic self, right? Um, can you ask yourself, if you left your community right now, would they know it? Would they miss you? That's a good question. And if they will miss you, then maybe you should add another bucket. Or another bucket.

SPEAKER_05 48:39

Uh if they if they will miss you, if they if they I'm sorry, if they don't miss it, sorry.

SPEAKER_06 48:45

If they don't miss you, like you know, the how big is your impact? Right. I mean, and I'm not saying that to overwhelm you or I'm just saying, you know, that's one of the things about being human is relationships, right? Um, and I think in this day and time it's very easy just to be exclusive, you know, be just to yourself and you're not out and about. Uh these days, people stay in the house for years. They will not even come out. I mean, I can order everything online, you know, do everything, you know. I can get my groceries at the door, it is true, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 49:24

And I think COVID actually increased that. Right. So we were already in silos before COVID has magnified that because, like you said, we can do everything. I really don't have to go out of my home. I can work from home, I can order everything I need from home, I can socialize from home. And so we we miss and we lose that human touch and connection. Yeah, I can even get my healthcare at home.

SPEAKER_06 49:57

Yeah, I can open up a bank account at home. Okay. I just did today. Okay. Another one. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 50:06

So at home.

SPEAKER_06 50:08

Yeah. You can do it at home. So I personally would admonish you to have to get out, like let that be something on your bucket list. Look on your bucket list and see if there's something that has to do with getting out and about and around other people, connecting with other people face to face, physically. There's something about looking at someone and understanding their story physically. Not just calling them on the phone, but sitting back in the day, my grandmother used to sit on the porch with, you know, when somebody and they would just talk. There's there's no end. Why is it four hours later? We still talking. Because this is good. And you begin to learn about. I admonish you to go and put on your bucket list to go out and connect with people that you don't know. Right. Yeah. That don't look like you that don't look like you. That may not even have the background that you perceive do not even have the background. You'll be you'll be surprised. The very person you feel like that does not have the background that you have, you have commonalities all through your stories. So we have about one more minute, actually. Any takeaways, any other takeaways we've given to them? Any other takeaways from today?

SPEAKER_01 51:29

Keep dreaming, keep dreaming, keep dreaming, keep believing you can do it. Yes, live your best life.

SPEAKER_05 51:36

Yes, vision boards, uh dreams, a bucket list help you create that. Yeah. And whatever your best life is, is whatever your best life is. You know, whatever you're accomplish those dreams. Accomplish those dreams.

SPEAKER_01 51:52

Yeah. And surround yourself with people who are dreamers. Yes. Oh, that's good. Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_05 51:59

That nurture dreamers need to do this. Yeah, not too harsh, but if you say you want to do this, okay.

SPEAKER_04 52:07

What's it gonna take? How can I help you?

SPEAKER_06 52:10

Yeah, yeah, that's good. Um, what place in the world feels like it's calling to you? This is not, I'm just this is a takeaway. What's calling to you? Um, and what skills, adventures, or challenges would expand your sense of what's possible? Like, you know, do you even have a bucket list? Have you ever were you one of those people at the start of this episode and say, a bucket list? Listen, either you just do it and kick the bucket, and what that means is that you're right. No, no, no, that's not what that means. So hopefully, we have changed your mind and persuaded you to actually have some things on your bucket list to do, to expand your life, to expand the experiences I'm sorry, in your life. Um, so okay. Well, any other comments? All right, well, again, thank you for joining her presence. Um, we have Kelly Moore, we have Melissa Vincent, I am Andrea Warmley. Please make sure you share, subscribe, um, make sure that you like. We are on YouTube, Apple, Spotify, all the major um podcast platforms and social media, TikTok. Um, please go there, find us. Her presence, one word, H E R, and then presence. All that's yeah, capital H, capital E, capital R, and then all that's one word. Her presence. Alrighty, see you next time.