Slow Down to Level Up: How Joyful Boundaries Change Everything

What happens when the dream you built becomes the cage that traps you?

In this episode of She Laughs, Nancy sits down with the vibrant and inspiring Cody Wassel, America's Joy Catalyst, who built a thriving $500K doggy daycare business from the ground up, only to realize she had become a prisoner of her own success. From burnout and bankruptcy to boundless joy, Cody's story is proof that it's never too late to pivot, play, and rediscover yourself.

Cody opens up about the moment a duck's little feet popping up out of a pond changed everything, how she went from grinding in survival mode to coaching women to live with intention and delight, and why slowing down might actually be the fastest path to the success you've been chasing.

In this episode you'll discover:

• Why your four quadrants of life matter more than your to-do list
• How curiosity can replace anxiety and road rage in seconds
• The power of nano-moments and why joy lives in the small stuff
• Why boundaries aren't walls, they're the door to your freedom
• How to stop waiting until life calms down to actually start living

Whether you're a frustrated entrepreneur, a woman running on empty, or simply someone who forgot how to laugh, this episode will leave you feeling seen, fired up, and ready to choose yourself.

Connect with Cody: codywassel.com | Instagram: @thecodyfactor

Transcript

speaker-0 (00:00.056) Hey guys, welcome back to the She Laughs podcast. We're so glad you're here today because I have this really fun, really energetic, incredible woman on today. Her name is Cody Wassle. She is known as America's Joy Catalyst and she helps frustrated entrepreneurs set joyful boundaries and create empowered intentional lives. I know I've been a frustrated entrepreneur at times and I know many women listening today have been. we, as Cody and I discussed right before we came on, know, here at the SheLives podcast, we really want the women listening to get encouragement and empowerment through listening to other women who've overcome their fears to tap into their gifts that God's given them to be their best selves and help others live their best lives and be their best selves. With that being said, Cody, I'd love to welcome you to the She Laughs podcast. Thanks for being here. No, I'm just kidding. you laugh. I laugh a lot and I'm so excited to be here and I appreciate you. speaker-0 (01:12.302) already and I'm with the snag guys okay Well, to your point, one of the reasons that it was such a joy to be invited to this podcast is because I think laughing is a little underrated and when we're not living in our joy, we're not able to laugh as much or if we think we have to wear a mask in our lives, we're going to take ourselves too seriously and we're going to forget to laugh or we're going to forget to have fun and play. you know, I'm going to share a little bit about my story today and how you guys can really harness some of those beautiful gifts that are all right there for you to have fun with. I love that we do forget to laugh. We can become so serious and so, you know, afraid or working and that we forget to not take ourselves so seriously in life, right? So, okay, Cody, you are known as America's Joy Catalyst, which I believe. And so I'd love for you to tell us a little bit about you and how you started helping other women to become not frustrated and to... Excel and their world of entrepreneurship and just your journey because these journeys, you know, what happens is we look at you and we're like, well, yeah, she's so, you know, she's pretty, she's fun. She's got it all together. That's her. But how can I do what I feel I'm being called to do because I'm feeling whatever fill in the blank, not enough in some way. Right. So can you kind of walk us through your, journey and your speaker-1 (02:50.83) I can, I can do that. I'm going to rewind that story for you guys a little bit. Back to when I owned a doggy daycare boarding facility and I built it from the ground up to about $500,000 a year. had 4,000 clients in the capital district and I had 150 employees over those 15 years that I owned and operated that business. And it started out as this little from my house, I love animals, I'm doing the thing and it just started to grow and then I needed a bigger space. and then a bigger space. And then it just kept growing and growing and it grew bigger and faster than I was ready for. And it wasn't even necessarily a dream that I had thought that I had wanted to create intentionally. It was something I was very good at and I went with it and it was amazing. Now the part where things got a little wonky is when it started to be something that I didn't enjoy anymore. So I had this feeling where I... I felt resentment when my employees would leave. I'd be like, why do they get to leave? And I'm stuck here. And I started to feel really like just, it was a lot. Dogs, animals do really weird things, you guys. They eat through walls. They get sick. They lick each other's butts. Like, you know, they do a lot of things and they share germs and it's just, there's a lot of stress. And so a day off is not a day off. Yeah. speaker-1 (04:13.91) Right? you could get a phone call at any point. So when I started to realize that I needed to do something to create balance in my life and create boundaries in my life, it wasn't really possible in that environment. I tried different teams. I tried adding this and this to fill up my cup. I tried to go on hikes. But then if I'm on the top of a mountain, you know, there could be an emergency and I have to get down the mountain. My cortisol levels were through the roof and I was beginning to get overweight, unhealthy and just drained, burnt out. It's forcing your joy. Like have joy. Yeah Yeah. So I started to say to myself, like, I can't do this forever. And I was like, well, then what are you going to do? Like, honestly, Cody, you've really only ever picked up dog poop for your whole life. So what are you really going to do? You know, like this is it. And I'm like, is this it? Like, is this it? I'm like, this can't be it. I mean, I just can't. Right, this is not what I meant to do forever. speaker-1 (05:28.222) No, and I felt like there was always something so much bigger. I felt like this caged bird in my own creation, my own dream locked me up. And what I realized as my employees kept leaving and I kept having this feeling was that I needed to get out. But like, how? And then one day it just kind of happened where I'm like, well, if you created it, who said you had to stay in it? Good analogy. speaker-0 (05:58.522) And then the next part was, well, if I'm not doing this, what am I going to do? was about to say, is that the next thought? What else can I do if I'm not doing this? What am I supposed to do? And I had no idea. But what I thought was, well, I could do anything. So there was a part of me that was like, I could do anything. Like, I'd be free to do anything. And then there was other part of me that said, yeah, but you only know how to pick up poop. Which wasn't true at all, by the way, like. listen to. speaker-1 (06:28.014) The basics of the voice, right? was like, well, you're not really good enough to do anything but this. And I mean, I did so much more than pick up poop, know, like animal behavior and, you know, rescuing and rehabbing. And I was sought after in the capital district. Like it wasn't, I became an expert in the field that I was in. It wasn't a small thing, but my brain made it sound like it was small. Okay, how we do that to ourselves, our critical voice. Yeah. That's what I say to that. And that's what you guys should say to yours too. No, no. It's a bunch of poppy. It's a bunch of poppycock you guys. So, you know, I started to take steps to kind of really like, okay, if I don't do this, what am I going to do? And I started to do this. It was actually like a spiritual weight loss. Yeah. speaker-1 (07:23.948) program thing, but it turned out we ended up just talking about things, other things. And I was sitting in the park one day before I was going to one of these sessions and these ducks swam by. And there was one duck that was kind of like further off than the other ducks. And all of a sudden this duck just went down, like in the water, like was really reaching for something like so good. And its little duck feet popped up. And in that moment, I said out loud, I need to sell my business. speaker-1 (08:01.526) And then after that, there was this like huge weight lifted off my shoulders. And I was like, wow, okay, like, is that what I'm going to do? And that was the catalyst for what moved me one weird, interesting nudge at a time to what is now America's Joy Catalyst. And, you know, it ended up where I signed up for this dream builder live in California. Right. speaker-1 (08:31.662) I didn't know I signed up for it because it was like a free ticket when you do this mind movie thing, like to help with your mind. I was into personal development. I was into all these things. Within a couple of months, I found someone to purchase my business. So I ended up selling it, signing the papers in February of 2019. And I was ready to go tour the world. Me and my guinea pig were going to go into schools and we're going to teach mindfulness and environment and how kids can do things from their own backyard. And we got into four schools and then the world got locked up. speaker-1 (09:11.436) But yeah, it happened. Now in between that, I had gone to this Dream Builder Live event where there was like dancing and unison and singing. And I was like, what cult thing did I just walk into? Like, what is this? You know, like, my gosh. And I was like, Cody, listen, like, you don't know what you're going to do next. So just be open, just experience it. And I'm like, OK, fine. Sounds good. So I'm there and I'm listening and this woman gets on stage and her name is Mary Morrissey and she starts speaking. And the way that her teeth and her lips moved and the way her hands moved and the things that, it just reminded me of my grandmother. And it had such this like comforting feeling to it. And I was like, hmm, she started to say things like, notice what you're noticing and the successful people in the world. you know, like Henry David Thoreau and Napoleon Hill and the big thinkers in the world, they all do this. And she kept listing the things that they were doing. And I was like, I do all of that. Like, I've done all of that. Actually, that's kind of how I live my life. I didn't know that they were things. And then I got really excited. Sure, yeah. I was like, I didn't know that those were things and if that's the key to life and I've already been doing it and I didn't know I was doing it, now imagine what I can do if I do know that I'm doing it. speaker-0 (10:35.488) Yeah, if I harness that knowledge, right? Right. So cool. So So I decided that I was going to become a life coach because that was clearly the way to become a speaker, which doesn't necessarily have to be true, but that's what, you know, was being shown to me. And I became a life coach and I started to coach people and help people. And then I started to speak and then I started to MC and then I went bankrupt and then I just kept going. Wait, okay, so you were bankrupt, but you kept pushing through because that's one of the things that can happen on the road to it can you know, Yeah, it can because you know, it's such an interesting thing is like, I was, I was sure I was going to 10x my income. Because that's what everybody says, do these things and you'll 10x your blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, I believed it. I believed it. And, and some people do, right, and others more often than not go through a period of struggle. And this was the truth of what it was. And with all the things happening and trying to grow a business when the world was in panic and so on and so forth, it just didn't work out the way that I thought it was going to. But what it also gave me was the ability to serve people who, when they think they have nothing and they can't take the money and they don't value themselves enough, speaker-1 (11:58.828) I can say, that's not true because you get coffee, tattoos, or maybe you smoke or you drink soda. Right? So there's all these ways that you can take out these things and you can put that towards you. Because when I had nothing and I didn't know how I was going to feed my dog, I still chose me. So it allowed me to go to these real depths of how am I still caring for myself and how am I still making sure that I'm moving forward, even when money is an issue, because that's one of the biggest things that people say, well, I don't have the money to do that. I don't have the money to take care of myself. I don't have the time. And both of those things are not true. You can create in time. Yeah, golly, amen. Yes. So that experience allowed me to really get comfortable with surrendering to the process and going a little deeper and seeing what that was. And I came out on the other side more joyful than I was even before. I've always been a happy person. that just kind of I innately wake up and I'm ready for the day. But there was something about prioritizing myself, loving myself, caring, nourishing, taking time like People, say that, I used to say this, I don't have time to cook. speaker-1 (13:17.58) I don't have time do say that, go ahead and keep talking. I say that. Like I don't have time to what nourish it. It's the guys drinking water like water and food. These are some just basics. Stay hydrated, eat good food. And these are some of the things that people say that they don't have time for. This is the basic function and need of your body in order for your mind to work well and your gut and your brain health to be lined. and for you to be able to make those healthy decisions is just the fundamentals. And even that people rush through. That is so true. speaker-1 (14:02.062) Imagine if making food for yourself was like dating the best person you could date. Right? having such a Having a romantic dinner with yourself. Why? Because you 100 % deserve it. And if you're trying to call in that love of your life and you're not cooking for yourself in a romantic way and doing this, listen, you're not going to be attracting the thing that you want to be attracting if you're not actually doing the thing for yourself first. And it also goes with business. That's right. I'm ending up at the counter unwrapping a protein bar and that's dinner. Yeah. So and it applies to business too. It applies to our businesses. are you know, attracting the clients and you know, all that. I remember I used to wake up and one of my clients was like, I got arrested and blah, blah, blah. And I was like, oh, can you come get my dog? And it was like three o'clock in the morning. And I said, Like, what? Um, now listen, I'm really glad that I was there to help the dog. But speaker-0 (15:10.862) Bye! But boundaries, know, like boundaries. You're talking about your sleep is important. Your nervous system, taking care of that, slowing down enough, that's important. Hydration, massively important. We are chronically dehydrated across the whole world and especially in the United States. Our hydration is so important. mean, you know, being hydrated also helps. us not go into states of dementia and Alzheimer's. A lot of those are, you know, mean, those things matter. Your focus, the way you're... Yeah, there you go. Take a sip. Everybody take a sip. You're right. drinks of water. All together now. speaker-0 (16:05.582) And so for the ladies listening today who are like, okay, Cody is inspiring because you are. I'm feeling encouraged. If they're struggling where they are, if they get in touch with you, how are you there to help them? Tell us a little bit about how you are able to serve these women that they find themselves in a similar place in life. Yeah. So part of what happens, what happened with me was a heightened awareness to myself. Noticing when things felt a certain way. We're not programmed to actually feel, feel those things or notice them. We're actually told to like stuff it down and keep on going. And yes, and you're True, yeah. And you're going to be in your masculine more when you're an entrepreneur, generally speaking. I was in my masculine energy for a really long time. Like just get it done, do it, grind, grind, grind. And you also can't go fully all into the flow either because then nothing happens. There still has to be action. But what we do is when people come to work with me, we start to evaluate where our quadrants of life are. Where's the one that's suffering the most? So that starts to bring in a focus that's maybe just not on business and not on, say, health. So you can have somebody who is super healthy, goes to the gym, and totally rocks their business. But they have no free time, and their love life is poo. So we start to bring awareness to the speaker-1 (17:58.86) the four quadrants of life and how we can even those out because we only have a hundred percent of the self. There's not extra. quadrants for people listening that may not know what are those quadrants. Yes, so you have your time, money, freedom. You have your vocation. You have your health and wellness and you have your relationships. Okay. So those are your quadrants. And then we have to ask ourselves in those quadrants, where is it suffering the most? And what is it that we really want? So we go through visualization and then we go through I call it the fundamentals of joy. So how do we practice pivot and play throughout the day when we're learning something new? I remember somebody saying to me, you know, I went on this spiritual journey on Holly's awakenings and, you know, I thought like life would get better and I'm looking for the secret to life, but just, just, things just kept, you know, blowing up and blowing up and it's perspective. Right, so if you think that you have to even work hard at being a different person who's really wants to do that? speaker-0 (19:10.472) Yeah. You know, but if I say to you, hey, today, why don't you play with being a little less serious? And how can we do that? Maybe it's answering the phone with an accent. Oh, I don't... You know, like, and it can be something really weird and little and tiny. You know, it's very easy for us to change the big things in life. We know this, you know, this person is toxic and I need them out of my life or this job is draining me and I need to quit. You know those things. That's the big stuff, right? You can notice that really easy. But how do we get into the little nano-awarenesses of life that actually move the needle even more than the big events? Because once you're through the big events, you're like, hmm, now what? Things changed and they did get better, but I still, hmm. And that's in the sweetnesses in the nano moments and the shifts in the things that are like, you're sitting in the car and you feel a profound gratitude for the way that the light hits the dew on the leaf of the tree. speaker-1 (20:26.452) something that you never took a moment to look at before because you were too busy. It's taking a bite of the food that you made for yourself and instead of shoveling it down your face, you're letting it smush across your tongue and really taste all the flavors of the magic that you just cooked for yourself. And slowing down. Wow. speaker-0 (20:52.334) Well, yeah, being slowing down, still. And that's kind of scary, right? So a lot of people think, well, if I slow down, then I'm not going to be successful and these things aren't going to happen. nothing will get done. Right. That's not true. Because if you slow down and you give back to yourself in that way and you really start to just move into the richness and the juiciness of life, what happens? You become more joyful. You become more magnetic. You have more energy. And when you have those things, everything starts flowing. More possibilities come in. And then you have choices. And all of a sudden you are successful more than you ever have been before because there is this magnetism about you that people want to know about, they want more about. You know what? I want to buy that from her or I trust her because look what she does. Right? Yes. And so that slowing down is not something to be afraid of. It's something to be treasured. speaker-1 (22:02.216) Your time and your health are your two biggest, most valuable assets. And so how do we get that back and how do we pour more joy in there and create the joy? Gosh, I love that. I totally believe in this. I find myself on days when I wake up and I'm like, I've got so much tackle. I try to really dial that natural instinct to just rush through and get up, shower, do this, and give God those first 15 minutes of my day and not just checking a box. Like, okay, okay, yeah, I've read that. scripture, I've done that, okay, now to this bit to really be still. And I find that when I'm really still and connected in that and slow down, that I can receive that and it's a complete 180 shift. Once my feet hit the ground, then it would have been had I put them down on the ground and left with that initial emotion, right? Get it done, get it done, go, go, go. And then the day will flow like, because I've surrendered it, you know, to him, it will flow and I'll have more time to get done. I mean, it's just amazing how just breathing and slowing down and taking, I love your idea of taking small little mini shifts. speaker-0 (23:33.542) And the day I've never thought of answering the phone with an accent, but I love that. I think that we to tap into our playful side, right? Which is so important. You said we, we need to laugh more. Like you said at the beginning, right? It's just so great, you know, to be it like that is just a tiny thing that I think helps us let go of. I've got to be so serious. I've got to get this done. And once this project is finished, then I can relax, you know, but. What you're saying is take that, that energy of slowing down and that playfulness and to that project instead of putting it off until whatever it is, you know, getting your taxes done, finishing this report for your boss or getting the kids, you know, the application for college. And then I will, you know, to really slow down through that, right? It's like a mind shift through the, through the task. Yeah, and I think one of the like, so I'll give you an example. Yeah, you know, people get really amped up when people cut them off. Right? Yes. Okay, so that's a popular one. Road rage. Yeah, imagine for a second, you're in your car, somebody cuts you off. And you're about to start to say the things that Ahem. speaker-1 (24:58.314) aren't nice because this person did this thing and now you're mad, but instead you say, hmm, I wonder what's going on in their life that they needed to speed for. And you can make up a bunch of stories and it doesn't matter what it is, but the hmm is the curiosity. And the curiosity is what heals. When we're curious, we're not angry. When we're curious, we're investigating. When we're curious, we're able to ask ourselves new questions that gives us new answers. And so just by being curious, you shift. everything in the day. I love that. And I would think that would give you a different perspective of looking at them now as a human. When you say, okay, what could be going on in their life where they've got it? Or maybe they're just really unhappy and they're like, you whatever it is, it now you've humanized them instead of just thinking them as, as this card that is an person that's making you crazy. Right. And it's more of, okay, I'm going to show it's really showing them grace. Yeah. You know, and instead of reacting like, well, I'm going to speed up and I'm going to cut them off, you know, whatever it is. speaker-1 (26:26.614) I mean, listen, there's grumpy people out there, no doubt. you're going to encounter them, right? And there's going to be sticky situations in business and in life and all the things. But if you approach it differently, and you approach it with curiosity, then you're not going to be taken out of your peace. People are like, I want peace. I want to feel peace. Okay, well guys, it starts with you. It starts within and it's only created when you, the world outside is always going to be chaotic. This is nothing that we can control ever. But we can 100 % control that we respond in a different way and we ask ourselves a new question. You know, and even one of the other things I like to do for those of my friends out there that have anxiety, I had really bad anxiety. But one of the other things I like to do and how I solved my anxiety is I asked myself this. What happens when you're anxious, I'm like, well, I freak out and I start thinking about all these things. Okay. Are any of those things actually real? No. Okay. What is real? What do you know to be true? And the answer that I came up with was that I'm always okay or better. Right? So the pattern of life has shown me that every time I got anxious about something that was blowing up in my face, the result of that 24 hours, 48 a week, or even a month later, was that it resolved and it was even better than it was. So if I know that pattern to be true, why am I getting anxious? Right, why would this be different? speaker-1 (28:16.622) And so you just start to ask yourself different questions and things and start to ask yourself, like, do I know to be true right now? Wow, that's great. Well, I love this. Yeah. Okay. So ladies that are listening, Cody's had some obstacles in life, some hills and valleys and come out on the other side and has so much to share and to help you with. And so if you would like to know more about how Cody could help you bounce back or get out of whatever valley you find yourself in now, Yeah. speaker-0 (28:55.39) She, can find her on her website at Cody Wassel, which is spelled W-A-S-I-A-L dot com, or at Instagram, which I'm always, Instagram has become so great for content. I think it's not just, you know, silliness, but some really great people are out there with great, I think, content on Instagram. And you can reach out to her there and learn more about her at at the Cody Factor on Instagram. So Cody, thank you for today. It's been super inspiring and I'm gonna implement something today. I'm gonna do the answering the phone with an accent. I love it. It's gonna be... I'll keep you posted on how it turns out, but we're so grateful for you sharing this today and you just have such a contagious energy and it's just so positive. you speaker-0 (29:54.774) I'm very thankful to have known you and for your time on the She Laughs podcast today. Thank you. My pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. All right, guys, thanks for tuning in and I hope you'll reach out to Cody and as always, thanks for being here at the She Laughs podcast. We'll see you next time. Bye guys.