Are Some Churches Too Emotional?

Are some churches too emotional?

Are others too rigid?

Yes and yes.

We are to worship God in spirit and truth. BOTH sides of this argument have something the other needs. The challenge is not to pick one side at the expense of the other.

It's so important that we tune our entire beings to be able to experience God with mind, body, and spirit.

In this episode, we'll discuss what to take from both sides of the equation in order to find a balanced state, full of the fruit of the Spirit.

In This Episode:

0:00 Intro

1:04 Emotionality In Our Faith

4:24 Are We Instruments?

9:30 Emotions Are Not An Enemy

14:15 How To Tune Your Body, Mind, and Spirit to Experience God

18:23 Emotional Intelligence Is True Intelligence

19:32 We Are The Helper

21:29 The Dance Between Spirit and Truth

Resources:

Feminist to Feminine by Justice Kuehl: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1957616512/

Follow Justice on IG: https://www.instagram.com/justicehopekuehl/

Mentioned:

Pints with Aquinas Video:

Quanta Article: https://www.quantamagazine.org/what-physical-life-force-turns-biologys-wheels-20260420/

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

The more traditional denominations say things like, Are you really feeling the presence of God, or is it just because there's smoke in the room and they have colorful lights and it's like a concert? Reversely, the non-denominational world will often be critical of the more traditional denominations for being overly ritualistic, and they'll say, you know, you're just going through the motions and you're just praying vain repetitions and blah blah blah. And I would say, what if it's both? What if both things are true? Hey guys, welcome back to With All Her Mind. I am Justice and Lo Keel, and we are again in my parents' studio, which is exciting to have a consistent space for a little bit. Guys, this week I don't have a book for what I have been reading. Um the time what I would have been reading, I spent making this top. So instead of reading, uh talking about what we're reading today, you can just admire my cute little shirt that I made. And don't look too closely, or else you'll spot mistakes. Um, sometimes instead of reading, I like to do crafts. I like to sew, I like to knit. Uh, I like to what else do I do? I used to do a lot of other things, but that's pretty much the main things that I do these days in my mom life if I can make time for it. Okay, today's video is gonna be about emotionality in our faith. There is so much conversation online surrounding emotionality in our faith. And I find that a lot of the more traditional denominations are critical of the non-denominational or evangelical, it's more like the non-denominational world, um, for being overly emotional in their expression of faith or for only being emotional. And it's just, I'll say things like, you know, are you really feeling the presence of God, or is it just because, you know, there's like smoke in the room and they have colorful lights and it's like a concert? And I would say, what if it's both? What if both things are true? Reversely, um, the non-denominational world will often be critical of the more traditional denominations for being overly ritualistic, and they'll say, you know, you're just going through the motions and you're just praying vain repetitions and blah, blah, blah. And there'll be sort of that reverse criticism. You're you're only engaging your mind, you're not engaging your spirit. And I think that there is validity to both perspectives. And I also think that maybe there's a balance that can be found somewhere in all of this. So that's what we're going to talk about today. Now, who am I to talk about denominations? Uh, I miss non-denominational charismatic kid. I'm the cradle charismatic. Um, I was born and raised in the non-denominational charismatic world. However, I have now, in my adult years, spent significant time visiting churches of other denominations, reading their theology, having close friendships with people in other denominations, but also I don't even know like where I find myself in the mix at this point. What I know is that I'm definitely charismatic. Um, and I'm very grateful for that part of my spiritual heritage. And I've also found a lot of value in some of the more orthodox practices and some of the things that maybe would be considered ritualistic in the discipline of like historical prayers and things like that. So that's who I am to talk about this issue. Okay. I'm a person who has drawn from both worlds and found value in both worlds, and encountered the Lord in real ways in both worlds, and encountered dysfunction in real ways in both worlds. And so that's where I want to talk about this because I think sometimes we have these dividing lines between denominations, and we have so much that we can learn from one another. We are the body of Christ. We are each making up different parts of the body, and it's good for the hand to understand the value of the foot, and it's good for the ear to value and understand the intestines of the body of Christ. Okay, we all need to recognize and value the different roles that we play in the body and to understand the role that each of us plays in this beautiful bride of Christ. There's a worship song from Abby Gamboa. I I don't even know if I'm saying her name right, so let me know down below. But um, it's called Who Else Is Worthy? And the first line is, I am an instrument of exaltation. And when I heard this, I was like, Yes, I love this lyric because I'd been having all these thoughts the last couple of months specifically about the idea of us as humans being instruments. And I'll kind of explain what I mean by this. Um, when we think of instruments, at least for me, I think of like I play violin and piano, and so I'll think of like, oh, a violin or a piano. But there are other things that are instruments too, like scientific instruments, like uh a microscope or um a test tube or a number of other things, a compass, like these are also instruments. And what's really, really cool about instruments is they let us see the evidence of another world that we wouldn't otherwise be able to engage with. Okay, so in a recent interview on Pints with Aquinas, there is a scientist named Dr. Stephen C. Meyer, and he's amazing. I've heard him talk a little bit in different interviews over the years. And in this interview, he talks about how scientists are making these incredible discoveries. And one of the things that they've discovered recently is inside of cells, and I'm not a scientist, so I hope I describe this correctly, but inside of cells, they have discovered things that look like engine parts or motors, something that you would see coming out of like Toyota or something. And they're discovering that the way that our cells work is very similar to the way that like motors work in vehicles and cars. And that is so fascinating because it points to this idea that we don't really create anything. We don't really invent anything, we just discover it. And so, of course, if an engine, if a motor is the most efficient way to create energy in that specific area that we're talking about, it makes sense that God would have designed ourselves the most efficiently, and that that very design is something that we would see on the micro as well. And we do see that. Not only that, but Dr. Steven Meyer was talking also about how the way that software works and like computers work, they're discovering is basically the way that like the mind works and how the mind stores information. And so even the methods that we've come up with for storing information and things like that are imitations, even though we didn't even know it, of a real scientific fact and truth that already existed. And scientific instruments allow us to see and participate in this world, the world of seeing that we haven't invented anything, we've just discovered it. Okay. So music is also a science that is as precise as physics or any other area of scientific research. I, like I said, I play violin and piano and in college took music theory, and I was so fascinated learning music theory and learning about all the ways that music works and the sound waves and all these things, and it is such a science. It is so mathematical. And you realize that music is something that exists, that God created, presumably at the beginning of time. And we use our musical instruments to participate in music that already exists and to experience it, but we're not really inventing it or creating it. We are simply getting to like participate in it. So this leads us back to the idea of our bodies. Our bodies are also an instrument that we get to experience and participate in a world that we could not otherwise experience and participate in. And our emotions are a huge part of that. So, of course, emotional experience inevitably needs to be a part of our participation in the spirit realm. So we shouldn't be afraid of an emotional faith. Now, I think where this gets a bad rep is when the emotionality is placed above truth, and emotional experiences are placed on a pedestal above truth, and we'll talk about that a little bit more later on. But so that's not what I'm saying. I'm not saying to place emotional experiences above truth, but they are a part of truth, and they help us experience and participate in truth when our instrument is properly tuned. So emotions are not an enemy for us. I think a lot of times Christians throughout history have fallen into this trap of believing that emotions are an enemy, are the part of ourselves that we're supposed to die to. But emotions are part of the instrument that we experience the music of the spirit through. That's not the thing that we're supposed to die to. A carnal expression of our emotionality or um us being slaves to our emotions, yeah, that's something that would be a problem. But not the idea of emotions and experiencing God through our emotions inherently. We want to have spirit and the truth. Because in different seasons, we will have to lean on one more than the other. And that's sort of the dance of life. And so there will be seasons when we have to rely more on the truth part because we are not feeling it. Our emotions are also affected by our physical health, they're also affected by our mental health, they're also affected by our relationships, they're affected by our community or our lack of community. And so, yeah, our emotions are not a flawless, um, you know, completely reliable instrument to rely to determine like reality through. But neither is just pure critical thinking. These two have to work together, spirit and truth. In marriage, you do not always feel like honoring your vows. Not just like in an existential sense, like you want out of marriage. I don't mean that. That's the the ones that are the hardest are the little things, like being kind when you're going through a hard time, or actually loving, like not just in your emotions, but also through your actions, loving the other person, the way that you promised, the way that God expects of you. Those are hard things. And so in marriage, you do practice the discipline of doing the right thing even when you don't feel it. Hopefully, practice that. We should all be practicing that. We all do it in varying degrees. I'm not always good at that, okay? But it's something that we need to grow in. And the same thing goes for our relationship with God. So we do not always feel the lovey-dovey butterflies emotional experience. In fact, we might feel the opposite. And it's in those times that we rely on the truth, we rely on the vow. We rely on, okay, I'm gonna lean more on the truth part of my brain right now, and that's kind of what we're gonna lead with. But just like in marriage, in marriage, when that's happening, it's a little red flag for you. It's like, oh, okay, I need to check in. I need to figure out am I, am I, maybe I'm not sleeping enough? Maybe I'm not praying enough, maybe I'm not uh any number of things, okay? It's a little check engine light of like, okay, it's good that I can keep doing the right thing even when I'm not feeling it, but really we want to protect that spark and keep that fire alive. Same thing goes for our relationship with God. So there's times where yes, we want to keep doing the right thing even when we don't feel it. And I really appreciate that a lot of the denominations that are more um like ritual or discipline based that provides a sense of peace for especially men who are not emotionally minded to feel like they have a valid faith still. Hey, I don't feel all this, but I still have a valid faith. That's great. That's really great. But I also think that's not the end. I think we should be working towards having a complete integration and alignment where our body, mind, and spirit are aligned and able to fully, they're they're tuned and able to fully experience the music uh or participate in the spiritual life. You want both of them. Another way of saying this is that you can have a marriage where you're doing all the right things, but you don't have romance. And romance is the breath of life in a relationship. And you want that in your walk with the Lord too. You want that heart emotional involvement. It will not always be there. It will not always be that way, and that doesn't mean that you don't have a valid faith. It doesn't mean that you're not really believing. It's just a season where it's not like that, but you're working to get back to that place. And inevitably, you know, the emotional quotient of our relationship with God, I think, is going to be more highlighted for women because we are more emotionally expressive, we are more able to communicate our emotions, and uh so inevitably we're gonna see that more in women's relationships with the Lord. That doesn't mean that men don't also have emotional relationships with the Lord or that they shouldn't. It's just gonna look more obvious for the most part with women. So, how do we tune our instrument, the instrument of our body, mind, and spirit? How do we tune it? Well, Galatians 5, 22 through 23 says that the fruits of the spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Okay, so these are not just disciplines that we can do, they are also feelings, which tells us this is probably a combination of a discipline and a gift from the Holy Spirit. It is both. It's gonna involve both things, and and they are his fruits that he grows in us. So, how do we grow these fruits through prayer and other spiritual disciplines, but most importantly, through asking the Holy Spirit, which through prayer, to grow these fruits in us, and when we are walking in the fruits of the Spirit, our instrument is more in tune and more able to properly perceive the Lord through our emotions, through our bodies, through our minds. As women, we get a lot of flack for being emotional. And this is something that gets exploited in men and women relationships when there is dysfunction. So in a healthy male-female dynamic, there will be differences, but where there is vulnerability in a woman, there will be strength from a man, and vice versa. And instead of exploiting those vulnerabilities, we highlight the strength that the other brings to the table. Now, unfortunately, one of the things in us that is a vulnerability is our emotional, our heightened emotional state. It is also a gift. So a good man who is properly tuned, walking in this the fruits of the spirit himself, eating the fruits of the spirit, he is not going to exploit that. He's going to learn how to rely on that emotional intelligence that you carry and how to help you keep that in alignment. And obviously, ultimately, as one, that's our responsibility, is to make sure that our emotions are kept in alignment. But that should not be exploited. That should not be looked at and ridiculed, that we are more emotional. This is great. We were designed this way, and so that's for a reason. We shouldn't despise any part of like how God designed us and how we carry his image as women. So John 4 23 says, But the hour is coming, and now is when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth. For the Father is seeking such to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth. So, yes, that involves truth, which uh women possess. Okay, we need to go ahead and make this very clear. Women possess a capability to correctly perceive truth and spirit. Okay. But if we were to say, generally speaking, what meant women might have more of a strength towards, we're gonna lean more towards the spirit, and men are gonna lean more towards the truth part. Not to say that all of their critical thinking is true. I'm just saying those are kind of like the strengths that we will more naturally fall into. But we both possess the ability to do both, okay? And what is beautiful is that that is what the Lord desires. He desires worshipers who worship him in spirit and in truth. And part of that spiritual worship is going to involve the emotions. Just like when you're saying something, imagine that you're at your your grandfather's birthday party and he's had a huge impact on your life, and everybody's going around and sharing something that they're grateful for, and you cry because you're grateful. You're having a true and spiritual or emotional expression of your love for your grandfather. Of course, we're gonna have that in our expression of our love for the Lord. To have that spirit and truth worship, our hearts are going to be engaged. They need to be engaged. So emotional intelligence is a real form of intelligence. Your intuition, whatever, whatever you want to call it. It doesn't mean it's always right, just like our other intelligence is not always right, but it is a true way to look at the world, examine the world, and make decisions. And it's okay that as women, we tend more towards this. It's okay. It's also okay that men tend not towards that and that we come into balance with one another, especially when your instrument is tuned, when you're having the fruits of the spirit really prevalent in your life and you're having a vibrant relationship with the Holy Spirit, you can especially trust your emotional intelligence and your instrument of emotionally experiencing the Lord during those times. We want to be grounded in the fruits of the spirit and in virtue. And virtue are things like justice and forbearance. There's a crossover with a lot of the fruits of the spirit, but you know, being a person of integrity and character and honor and those things. So there's part of those things are choices that we make, but a lot of those things are gifts of the spirit that are given to us by the Holy Spirit when we have a relationship with Him. Genesis 2, 18 says that we are the Ezer, which is often translated as helper. That's one way to definitely properly translate it. We are the helper. We reflect back to men who they are. And part of the way we do that is through emotional intelligence. And it is good and it is okay that this is an emotional thing that we do. And again, men should not be exploiting that emotional vulnerability. They should be protecting it so that we can use it correctly in order to experience the Lord and to function in the world and to share the feminine heart of God and the feminine strength of God with the world around us. It is good that women are not men and men are not women. It's good. It's really good because again, the same vulnerabilities that can be exploited can also be protected and nurtured and actually our strengths and actually are things that are really beautiful and valuable that we bring to the table. And so, as men and women, our differences allow us to have a dynamic relationship where we both bring um something that the other needs, and there can be a gratitude for that, and there can be a thankfulness. This week we moved out of our house, and let me tell you, I got to see an example on display of masculine strength in a very, very real way where my husband was having to move heavy things all day long. And I would not have been okay. I had to move a few things, and I was like, I literally am not okay after this. And he could just do it all day long. Every time I saw him, he had a smile on his face and he was like, We're doing it, we're moving stuff. And I was so thankful. I was so, so thankful that he has the capacity to just keep picking up heavy boxes and moving them all day long. I don't have that in me on multiple levels. So that's just one example of kind of how we can see this playing out. It's really good for us as men and women to learn this dance of balancing the more pragmatic approach that men have with the more emotional approach that women have. But just because there is a dance does not mean that one is more or less valuable. We want the spirit and the truth. We want to feel the emotionality of our relationship with God. And next time you find yourself in worship and you have tears streaming down your face, there can be, you know, there's people online who are really, really critical about this, other Christians who are really, really critical about this. And I would just say, let their criticism go and just take a moment and thank the Lord that He gave us an instrument of experiencing His presence, of experiencing the emotions that come from loving, from being loved by Love Himself. This is a gift that we've been given, and it's incredible. And we should not be afraid of this as Christians, especially when we are grounded in the truth and we've got the fruits of the spirit in our lives. So the disciplines, the spiritual disciplines that come from some of these more traditional denominations are really great, and they can be tools of helping us get back on track and helping us grow and nurture the fruits of the spirit in our life. You don't want to stand on just one leg or the other. You want that? You also want the emotional, beautiful experience that we were created to have, a full emotional experience, even sometimes having colorful lights and worship and having it like a rock concert experience. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. It doesn't need to be that. But just because you experience an emotion through that and it heightens your experience of love for the Lord, there's nothing wrong with that. Thank him for it instead. Thank you guys so much for watching today's episode. I hope that you watch again next time. Comment down below what you thought. Like, subscribe, share it. If it blessed you, share it with a friend who you think you would encourage to. And I'll see you guys next time.