Do We Love...Good Habits

What if your best habits are the ones you never notice? We kick off by hunting down the quiet routines that make life easier—like the partner who won’t touch coffee until the morning meds are done, the five-second door ritual that resets the evening, and the pets who sprint to the fridge the second the TV clicks off. Those little anchors matter more than we think, and naming them can change how we see our days.

From there we wrestle with a big question: where does generosity end and self-erasure begin? A friend’s request for a hard-to-find coffee jug becomes a test of love, time, and limits. We parse the difference between an easy yes in a reciprocal friendship and the creeping resentment of being the “always on” helper. The takeaway is simple and hard: a healthy no protects the yes that counts.

Work adds another layer as a colleague steps in with a read-the-room hug at exactly the right moment. That opens a deeper look at emotional literacy on the job—using the HALT check (hungry, angry, lonely, tired), naming moods out loud, and asking for help when anxiety surges. We talk through panic tools, sleep supports, and why saying “panic attack starting” can actually shorten the storm. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about having a system and a circle that catch you.

We keep it playful too: mimosa vs bloody Mary vs “just give me a screwdriver,” cruise life vs local stays, Ocean City NJ vs MD, and a lightning nod to the Jersey Devil. We close with a peek at an upcoming guest and an art show in Asbury Park, plus plans to refresh our intro and outro once the coughs clear.

If this mix of real-life habits, friendship boundaries, and practical mental health tools resonates, tap follow, share it with a friend who needs better yeses and braver noes, and leave a review to help others find the show.

Notice there is a Jersey Devil but not a Jersey Angel

Transcript

Kicking Off With Good Habits

Heather 0:23

15 of Do We Love That For You.

Zia 0:28

I did sing it. We both did. Yeah, we're singing. We're harmonizing now. Do we love that for you?

Heather 0:36

Okay. So today's title is Do We Love Good Habits.

Zia 0:41

Good habits.

Heather 0:43

Because those of you who listened last week, we were talking about habits and breaking them and starting them. And both of us absolutely failed at coming up with good habits.

Invisible Habits We Don’t Notice

Zia 0:58

I mean, we went speechless, which is hard for us to do. We literally went speechless when we mentioned that.

Heather 1:07

Really did. So everybody knows after we finished recording, we spent over an hour researching. Me and my I brought you down my rabbit hole researching why you can't find good habits. So we realized that in having good habits, there are habits that you don't comment on because they're good. And the one we kept coming across was brushing your teeth. I wake up every morning. Yep. I brush my teeth after I get out of the shower. Right before I go to bed, I brush my teeth again. Yep. Me too. Sometimes I'm fortunate and I get another brush in there, but not typically. So another habit was one of our five-minute loves a couple of weeks ago when we asked, Did you make your bed? I make my bed. That's a good habit. I don't have that habit. But that's okay. It's an okay not to have. So that is what we learned. We learned that the good habits aren't identified because they're good. You don't need to change anything about them.

Zia 2:25

So yeah. So actually, we created a habit that we have to do it every week. So things you don't really realize that you're doing, you're actually having a good habit. We just like we said, you always have focus on a bad habit. And you know, if we were like a good habit, think about that.

Heather 2:54

I don't know. Yeah. So we made a deal with each other, and I don't know if you did it, but we said we were gonna try and find a good habit to the people who were closest to us. You were gonna do it for a couple of coworkers, and I was gonna do it with the family around here. Did you do it? No, I didn't. Did you find any good habits?

Zia 3:15

Well, I was thinking still about my own that we didn't look up and see. And I was thinking, like, I I have a habit of when I come home with Charlie, I make sure that I kind of give her her hugs and kind of give her her toothbrush, actually. I give her her toothbrush. The girl! Yeah, so she also has a toothbrush habit too. Um, but yeah, it's like that is my little like five-second get my jacket off, put my bag away, give Charlie her toothbrush. So that was one of them that I was thinking. I did not ask anyone in the office um because I had quite the week, so I wasn't really in the office to see my seat and my desk. We'll get to that later in the we'll get to that later in the podcast.

Spotting Others’ Routines At Home

Heather 4:03

Yes, yes. So yeah, go ahead. What'd you find? So I just did like the secret stalkers kind of finding good habits, and I found a couple. Rich wakes up every morning, makes the coffee, okay, then takes his pills, yeah, then sits down. Exactly, and then he sits down, and he won't sit down until he takes his pills. And one morning he got pulled away from taking his pills, yeah, because we had snow, so we went out to clear the snow. Yeah, and as soon as he walked in, he still hadn't gotten his cup of coffee. He went over, made his cup of coffee, got his pills, and then sat down. So his good habit is that he takes his morning pills every day before he gets to coffee. Yep. Yeah, so that was one that I noticed for him.

Zia 5:00

Very good. Yeah, I like that. So yeah, we just have to work on that, and maybe we'll bring it up later when we find some more. Yeah, we'll start looking.

Heather 5:08

Oh, and I did find one that I was gonna be funny, but you you brought Charlie up. So our dogs know that when the TV gets turned off at night, they get a piece of ham. I love it. Because we have dogs that need to take some medication, yeah. And so, in order to give them their medication, we just wrap it up in a piece of ham. So the cat and the two dogs, as soon as the TV gets turned off at night, they're in the kitchen, standing next to the refrigerator.

Zia 5:36

How smart are they? Charlie actually knows when the show ends. She sees the credits on the screen. And she knows, she knows that's the end of the show. That's funny. So she's like, let's go, let's go.

Heather 5:51

She likes to watch TV. Yeah, she does. She's a TV watcher, it's weird. My my dogs here are not TV watchers, but Marsha, Eliza's dog, watches TV. See, yep, it's very strange, isn't it?

Zia 6:03

Like it is, yeah. So we were talking also, and it's like we're talking about friends. I'm sorry, Charlie wants to speak if you hear that. That is Charlie barking if you hear her in the background. You know what? Disagreeing with me.

Heather 6:16

You know what? Our podcast is about living our life. So the Charlie Barks.

Zia 6:20

That's right. Charlie barks, I'm saying hi. That's right. So we were talking about uh where where's the line between doing anything for a friend and being taken advantage of? So I actually have a very good story about this.

Pets, Medication Tricks, And TV Cues

Heather 6:37

Yeah. Okay. So I talked to her about it after the situation happened. And it's my friend Rebecca. She lives in New Jersey. Whoop, whoop, out in, well, she's from we, she's my actually, she's my oldest friend that I know. We went to kindergarten together. We grew up in the same town. She now lives in a town called, oh gosh, Hope. Okay. Which is out almost in Pennsylvania on the other side of Hackett's town. She's out in the country. I promise it when I go to my dad's. So she's out there, and apparently, I didn't see any advertisements for it, but apparently last a week or two ago, Dunkin' Donuts did this 48-ounce bucket of iced coffee.

Zia 7:27

Yeah, I have pictures of those around Instagram.

Heather 7:31

And she sent me a text and she's like, Massive favor. Can you see if you can find this? Apparently, it's only being offered in New Hampshire. I really, really want one. And I responded, sure. If I can find it, why not? Why not? So I did a little bit of research on my own and I found out they were actually being sold like 10 or 15 miles from here. Oh, wow. In three different um Dunkin' Donuts. Yeah. So the next morning I got up and I went to Dunkin'. And they didn't have any, the closest one. So I drove to the next one, and they didn't have any. Before I drove to the third one, which was the 15 miles away, I decided to call it. And I talked to the lady in the store for honestly five minutes. It was a great conversation. And she's like, the only other place that might have it is in Massachusetts, but it's two hours away.

Zia 8:30

Oh God.

Heather 8:31

Oh and I sat there for a minute and I'm like, okay. And I'm like, can you see their inventory? And she says, yeah, her their inventory says they might have like three left.

Zia 8:41

Oh my God.

Heather 8:41

But you're driving two hours.

Zia 8:43

Two hours. Yeah.

Friendship Lines And Being Used

Heather 8:44

And I'm like, I love Becky. I love her a lot. And I would do anything for her. But I'm like, a two-hour drive on a Friday afternoon into Massachusetts to drive with the mass holes. I'm like, I can't do it. So I came home and I texted her and I said, I'm so sorry they're out of them. And she was like, Don't worry about it. I love you. And we talked about it for a while. And then you and I talked about it before we recorded last week. And I was like, and you were like, wow, you did that for her? And I'm like, I would do anything for her. I would, I there's no line for her. Yep. I am okay doing that because I know I could do the same thing for her. Yeah. Can you run into Pennsylvania and get me blah blah? And she'd be like, all right, I'll go after work or I'll go tomorrow morning or whatever. So I feel like I have a few friends that I would do anything for, but I also know that I have been taken massive advantage of.

Zia 9:47

Yeah. Yeah. So I yeah, and I feel like I have about I don't know, probably about four friends that I would do that for. Yeah. And um excluding relatives. Yeah, I'm excluding relatives, but just friends. And um I too also have been taken advantage of, you know, as a friend. Um so yeah, what you know, drawing that line is very important. You know, this is way too much. Um, because we've both been in situations where you like you put your all into something, and then it doesn't come back your way. Yeah. So you have to draw that line sometimes. I mean, like you, of course, are included in one of those four friends. So I'd be like, yeah, yeah, do it. Yep, I'll go do it.

Heather 10:37

Yeah. Um especially now that we're so far apart, there is gonna be things that are offered in New York that aren't offered here, and vice versa.

Zia 10:45

I mean, why not? Some of the things, some of the things that you would ask me to go look for, I probably would have gotten you one already because that too, yeah. That too. Yep, yep. So, do you want me to start the next thing or are you leading into that?

Heather 11:02

Um, well, I'm gonna bring the next, I'll bring the next one ahead because go ahead. I think it's fun. Yeah. So the next topic, and then we have a theme today, and I hope you guys all catch our theme. Yeah, but do you have a friend that can substitute for me? Well, we're I'm gonna make this personal right now. Yeah, do you have a friend or do you know someone that you can use as a substitute Heather if you're having a bad day at work? So I would have said no.

Zia 11:38

I know you would have. Yes. Until until until um, I had a friend at work, Angela, and we talk every morning. We're both two Capricorns, and I have her permission to use her name. Yep, because it was very important. And something had happened at work. I was not happy. I wasn't happy the whole week. Um, but she knew I was just having a really hard time at this situation. She did. And she stood in front of me. I was very anxious. So, because it was happening to another friend. So something was happening to another friend, so I got anxious.

Heather 12:15

Another adult. It wasn't a child.

Zia 12:16

Another adult.

Heather 12:17

Yes, yes.

Zia 12:18

Specify that. I so I um I was standing there and she walked right up to me and she looked at me and she goes, Um, are you okay? And I'm like, Yep, because Z is always okay. Z is always okay. Yep. And she said, Um, I know you don't want a hug, but I'm going to give you a hug now. So here we go. You're going to get a hug now. And I was like, okay, Angela, thank you very much. And she gave me a hug. And then when I had told you, you had reached out later on to her, I did. Thank you. Because you know that's what I would have done if you know the situation too. Exactly. And so, yeah, so it was kind of funny that you know, sometimes you do sometimes you don't know that people well, my face reads everything. Like you could, you know how I'm feeling on my face. But she was like, Snew this person was important to me, and then she was kind of like, You need a hug right now, regardless if you need it, you think you need it or not. Yeah, yeah.

Heather 13:24

So I reached out to her after we, because this all happened on our podcast night. Yeah. That we that we prep, but so it was our prep night, and you had told me this story, and I was like, Oh my gosh. So the second we were done talking, I messaged her and I said, Thank you, thank you so much for filling in for me today with zeal. I know what happened, and thank you. And we ended up talking, although I am gonna throw her under the bus right now. Oh, yeah, me too. Because I said, she goes, Oh, you were just talking to her, and I'm like, Yeah, we just finished our podcast prep. And she goes, Oh, I should really start listening to that. Yeah, Angela, Angela. Or Angela. Or Wait, remember when I first started actually in the school, I called her Andrea, and she answered Andrea every time. So Andrea. Yeah, Andrea.

Zia 14:27

Aw. Yeah, but she's a really, really good-hearted lady. She really is. Yep, yep. She really is. It can't hurt. She's a Capricorn, my god. What do we say against a Capricorn? Come on.

Heather 14:41

But I love, I love, love, love that A, she knew you needed the hug. Yep. And B, she knew enough to say, I am going to do this. You are going to accept it. And and you and her are close enough and and friendly enough that you accepted it because you knew you needed it.

Zia 15:06

Yeah.

Heather 15:06

So for that, I'm proud of you.

Zia 15:08

She never does anything that she doesn't fully put her heart into. Exactly. So I know she meant it with good intentions, not to get something. All right. So and then I love that she had the bravery to approach the Z. She'll get a kiss for that one. Yay, Angela!

Heather 15:34

Yay, Angela. Kudos to Angela. Yeah, kudos to Angela for that one.

The Dunkin’ Quest And Limits

Zia 15:39

All right, you want to start the next one? I will. So I did. We started talking about this one because I we This is what started our whole week. Yeah. And I actually um saw a meme about this um on Instagram. And the mom was rushing around. She's like, hurry up, hurry up, you know, and we got five minutes. And then all of a sudden she was like, she took a deep breath in and she was like, it's not an emergency. Okay, guys. Come on. Move it along a little faster. We just have to get going. You're not, you know, going up to pace. So slowing down, thinking it's not an emergency and telling others how your mood is today around you. Do you do that? Um, so I said that the other day I went into the office and things had just happened. They just like things were happening at work. I had a terrible week. I keep saying that all day, but those that know in the office that I had a bad week, I had a bad week. So I went into my boss and I said, if I don't get in a fight by the end of the day, everyone is blessed. Like, I'm like, you know, I'm like, what is what's his name from the uh-oh. Wait, are we having technical difficulties? I think we are. Hold on one second. Uh-oh. Let me see here. It's okay. Are you on 5G? I am. Here we go. I just lost you, so there we go. Okay. There you are. Okay. Sorry, people. So real life. Real life here. Um, real life, that's right. Um, so I did it like, you know, I go in some mornings and I'm like, I didn't sleep well. I'm working on like three hours of sleep. Sorry of my life. Just letting you guys know if I say anything that's offensive, let me know right away. Because it's gonna happen if I, you know, am grumpy. But I put it out there sometimes because I don't want people to be like, you know, oh, what's wrong with her? I'm telling you right now what's wrong with me. I'm either gonna get in a fight, I'm not in a good mood, and I haven't had sleep. So, you know, we always we always have that thing where they always said to the kids, um, what is it called? Halt, right? Are you hungry? Are you angry? Are you lonely? Are you tired? So if I get three out of four, holy cow. You know, yes, yeah, halt. Just go to the nurse's office and sleep half of the time. Like all the kids do, right? So what about you?

Heather 18:23

Do you put that out there or um okay, so and I feel like for both of us, at one point our health has to come into the podcast. Absolutely. Pre Heather fixing herself. No. I I don't think I did. I don't think I was conscious enough of my moods. Yep. Um I get that. I I don't think I realized I was in a bad mood or I was exhausted until you know, un until it was overflowing.

Zia 19:00

Until you met me and I was like, what the hell is wrong with you? But yeah, but that was a long time ago. I need my inhaler.

Heather 19:06

No, I'm still so I think now that I've started learning how to fix me, and I'm not fixing me to change me, I'm fixing me to balance me. Make it better. Yeah. Um, the VA has taught me so many different methods in which to do this. Um I have this little, I have some equipment that helps me sleep. I have um things that help me do deep breathing. I have um I have learned my emotions and how to identify them. So I feel like I'm better at it now. And I still have a very short window where I don't say if by the end of the day, like you are, but I feel like I'm saying I'm losing it right now. Yeah. So I I I feel like I'm going to get there, but right now I don't have the mental capacity to do that. I feel like, um, but I'm able to announce it as it's happening. I'm able to say, I'm losing it right now, I'm about to fight. Yep. And if you're around, you can grab me and move me. Yep. Or, you know, whoever's around that knows this. But I feel like my circle knows that that's how I do it, and they are all ready for me to explode.

Zia 20:32

Right.

How Many Friends Get A Yes

Heather 20:32

And it's a I'm making it sound like I, you know, walk down the street picking fights. I don't know. But no. But um, but I do have high anxiety, and and this is something I'm working through. Yeah. So when I start having a panic attack or my anxiety gets out of control, I've learned now how to say, having a panic attack. And it sounds silly, but I announce it, I scream it, I yell it, and everybody around me is able to help me.

Zia 20:59

I feel like it helps when you have the people around you that are accepting of just you, not a fake version that you have to be. Or the people who take advantage. Right. And then you're like, I have to hold this in, they're not gonna understand. You know, so it's very hard to keep holding that in when Yeah. Yeah. I mean and I do, I have a great office that they accept me for who I am. Yeah. And they know that, like, it's funny because I keep sending them those three groups, and it's usually an office group. And it's like it says, it says the one that's like, I'm ready to fight, and then the other one is like, no, don't do it. And the other one goes and grabs a drink and says, Go ahead, I'll watch. And I can tell you who's which in your office.

Heather 21:46

Right. Nope. Yo, I left Todd out. I'm sorry. And and and Angela's standing in the window looking in, ready to help anybody who needs the help. That's right.

Zia 21:59

That's right. She is. But yeah, it's like a very, you know, just to be able to communicate that way. Yeah. And for your groups around you to be in those circles that you put yourself in. Yeah. And I think that's an important thing that you and I have learned too to be in those circles of friends that are like that, not to, you know. Just be like, you know what? I have to be there because just cuz. Just because, yeah.

Heather 22:29

No, I don't. You don't have to. No. You can become an acquaintance.

Zia 22:34

Yeah.

Heather 22:34

And I can be happy and have a great time with you while we're sitting right there while we're supposed to be here. But when I go home, I'm not gonna worry about you because I have my own life to worry about.

Zia 22:46

And I've also taken up on uh Ricky Jarvais's saying on his new comedy that you can say whatever you want. People aren't gonna like it, but you can say it. As long as it's honest. Just as long as it on is honest, right? Honest and truthful. That's you know. I I really like his thoughts on those things. Yep. Yeah. Yep. Absolutely. So you have some guests, huh?

Heather 23:11

I do well, not yet. They're coming.

Zia 23:14

You're gonna, yeah.

Work Ally Steps In With A Hug

Heather 23:15

So Allie and Jeff um are on their way out. They're gonna come out tomorrow morning. Jeff bowls on Fridays. So they only have um the end of the month is the end of the bowling season. So he's like, I'd really rather not miss because it's the end of the, you know, it's this is the last couple of weeks. So I'm like, I'll do it. So they're coming out tomorrow morning, first thing, which is why we're recording it's Friday night right now when we're recording. Yeah. Um, and they're bringing Porthos' dog girlfriend. So Porthos is gonna have Lily here, so our house is gonna be crazy this weekend, but I love this because I moved away and I do a lot of trips to New York to see people, but I haven't had anybody come out yet. And I feel so honored that they're coming out to hang out for the weekend with us because I love them, they're awesome. Yeah. Um, Allie and I, I'll tell you, I mean, you know how Allie and I met, but I'll let everybody know. Um Allie worked at a doggy daycare, and I sent um Marsha Eliza's dog and Porthos to the doggy daycare, and this lady would come out and get them, and Porthos absolutely loved this lady. She would come out and Porthos would go insane so to be with her. He wanted to be with her, and and I was like, he so likes you, and she's like, he's such a good dog. And then he got hurt one day. Oh and they told me how he got hurt, and um, Allie was like, that's not really how it happened. She's like, I'll tell you about it, and and she broke it down and told me exactly what happened. And I was like, Oh my goodness, um, he's okay. Um, but he was not at fault for getting hurt, and it was implied as though he was involved in an issue and he got hurt in it. He wasn't, he was literally walking past an issue and got attacked. Yeah. Um, and long story short of that, that doggy daycare no longer exists. Right, right. Yep. That is no longer doggy daycare that is in your area. Yeah, yeah. Um, but then Allie had an issue with where she was living, yeah, and she needed a place to stay. Her parents lived um probably 45 minutes to an hour away, and she had just started started dating to work in. She's like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. And she's working in town. And I'm like, Eliza and I looked at each other, and what are you gonna do? And so Eliza's like, we have a spare room. So she packed up Lily, her dog, her shepherd, her cat Cosmo, and her, and they moved into our spare room and lived with us for a year so that her and Jeff could date. And by the end of the year, she wasn't living with us anymore, she was with Jeff. Yeah, a year and a half later they got married, so they are obviously meant to be, but yeah, so that's how we that's how we met, and um I'm super excited. She's a new friend, and my new friend, five, eight years, yeah, five years, somewhere around there. But I love her, she's awesome. Yeah, they're coming out. We're gonna play out here in New Hampshire. You we still have to get you out here, but I know, I know. It's just so busy right now, and yeah, we'll get you out here in this in the summer.

Zia 26:49

Yeah, probably when it'll be easiest, is in the summer. Yeah, because then I don't have any testing, right? And that's what you're getting into, yeah. That's what I'm getting into, yeah.

Heather 26:59

So so I think it's time we start our five-minute loves. Uh-huh. But five-minute loves. You were told something about five-minute loves this week. Do you remember what you told me about them? What somebody told you about our five-minute loves that we do wrong and we giggled about it.

Zia 27:18

Oh, because we didn't we we talked too much about our five-minute loves. Yes! I thought that was so funny. Yep, and I think we I think we I think we directed that first a couple episodes where we first started them. We had told Eliza that. We're like, we know that it's not gonna be a five-minute love.

Heather 27:38

No, it's supposed to be hot topics, so we just can't do it.

Zia 27:41

Yep, we just can't do it. No, we talk too much. We talk too much. Unless you ask us about our good habits, then we don't talk at all. And then we go silence.

Heather 27:50

Give me a good habit, give me one. I can't come on, you got one. What is it? You gotta have one. Don't trigger me.

Zia 28:03

No. All right, on to five-minute love. Give me five minutes to think about it.

Heather 28:13

All right, I'll give you that. I'll give you that then.

Zia 28:16

Um we had a we had a five-minute love from our listener, Kate, and we liked it so much that we decided we're gonna move it to a topic because yeah, we can't shut up about it. So you can't go laugh.

Heather 28:37

I'm still fighting a code.

Zia 28:40

Sorry. So we're gonna give you a short version of what we want to talk about. We're gonna give you the one answer. Yes or no? That's it. One answer. Right. So, so short side of the topic that we're gonna use instead of Kate's suggestion for five-minute love is New Jersey Devil? Is there do you believe there was a Jersey Devil or not? Of course there is!

Heather 29:06

I'm sorry, I can't say of course there is. Yes.

Naming Moods And HALT Check

Zia 29:12

I love it. Um I'll answer a long version. Of course there is. Yes. Why would you not think that? Look at my team's named after it. Come on, stop it. Yes, yes, come on. That's right. He's out there somewhere. He's gonna get somebody. Right. There's a big foot. Oh, wait, sorry. Oh can't say that yet. Can't say that yet. All right. So thank you, Kate, for bringing that up, but we're moving your five-minute love to a topic. It's gonna be a full topic.

Heather 29:44

Probably in a couple of weeks. Yep. All right, so speaking of Allie, Allie asked us, if you go to brunch, yeah, do you drink a mimosa or a bloody Mary?

Zia 29:57

So I do like both. Um, but I think I would probably reach for the mimosa, not the bloody Mary. Okay. Yep. Just because I want an orange juice. So if you're just if you're just offering that, I guess I'll go for the orange juice one.

Heather 30:18

Well, you see, my answer is neither. I don't like mimosas and I don't like bloody Marys, I'll take a screwdriver.

Zia 30:28

Isn't that kind of like a mimosa though without champagne? Not either.

Heather 30:35

I want I want to if I need to have orange juice and you want me to put alcohol with it, just give me a damn screwdriver.

Zia 30:44

Stop it. I can't. All right, next one from Allie is cruise resort or local. Oh, I said local, not sorry, my Jersey accent came out. Local. Locale.

Heather 31:03

Yeah, locale. Um I'm all about the cruise. I like being on the boat, I like being at sea, I like stopping at different ports and experiencing different things in small doses because you can go do one thing and then be done. And you can do one thing and be done, and I'm a cruise. Take me on a cruise.

Zia 31:28

Okay, so I had when I was little, I went on cruises a lot with my parents. Okay. Uh, which really wasn't the cruises I should have been on when I was little. Because I they were like very like uh, you know, you had to have the man manners and I I have my manners, but it's like you had to sit with a dress on, you know, and drink and drink your bloody Mary's dinner, right? At you know, six, seven, eight, you know. But like everything was prim and proper, and you know, it's like I yeah. And then resorts, I mean, we when we go to Aruba, we stay at a place. Okay, so you do the local Yeah, because it's not a resort, it's it's just a local place there that we should stay. Um it is like uh a holiday in, but it's like you know, we just don't buy a package or anything, we just all okay go and do it ourselves. But okay, um, I know Michael wants to go on a cruise just because the only cruises he's ever been on is with the navy. Well, and we're talking about doing one as a foursome. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like, you know, he's never been. Can you imagine that podcast? Real What's wrong with us today? Oh, but it's Friday night. So it's it's Friday night, yep. Um, Friday night lights, right? Isn't that what he like? I always told him, you know, there was always food, there was always this, there was that, there's a pool, you know, and he's like, yeah, okay, you know, I get my food on a time. Um, you know, anybody could eat it. No, you can eat one every second cruise. Yep. Right. So yeah, I guess, um, yeah, I guess I would have to say the local okay. Yeah. All right. Yep.

Heather 33:26

Yep. So Jeff, we're actually short of five-minute love, so we might have to sneak one in here. But all right. So Jeff, when I was out there a couple of weekends ago, Jeff had another one that we didn't get to do. Yeah. But he said Ocean City, Jersey or Ocean City, Maryland.

Zia 33:42

Okay, so this might shock everybody. Neither for me, because I've I haven't been to either one.

Heather 33:52

I'm gonna joke to death tonight. Oh my gosh. Okay, go ahead. I'm sorry, I had to act shocked.

Zia 34:01

Sorry. Yes, yes, so I neither one. Okay, yeah, I go ahead, your turn. Jersey neither me. So I g I guess I'm I'm I'm more favored to Jersey, so I'll pick that one even though I I I don't go there.

Heather 34:20

All right, so I went to Ocean City, New Jersey a bunch.

Zia 34:25

Okay.

Heather 34:26

We didn't go there all the time, um, but we went a lot. And Ocean City, New Jersey was great. Um, it has a boardwalk, it has all that. It's it's it's a great place. Um but then um actually my brother-in-law, um, Mike and Vince, they have um a condo down in Ocean City, Maryland. Okay, did we talk about that? Is that the one we talked about? Uh we talked about Mike and Vince. They're the ones who just had the baby.

Zia 34:59

No, no, no.

Heather 34:59

They're the condo.

Zia 35:01

I think we talked about that.

Anxiety, Panic, And Asking For Help

Heather 35:02

We have talked about the condo. That's where Rich Okay that's where Rich proposed to me. Um that's where I tried to flip a table in the in the in the water. That's a whole nother story one day. There's a there's a bar that's in the bay. So you walk into the bay and you drink. Wow. Right? Anyway, that's Ocean City, Maryland, and that's also where we did our uh music festival last year. Right, right. So I really like Ocean City, Maryland. It's very beautiful, very New Jer Ocean City, New Jersey-ish. Okay. Um so I don't know that I can pick between the two. However, if I had to pick, I honestly like Rehoboth Beach Delaware. Wow, okay. Um actually that's not true. I like Amelia Island, Florida, but I can't drive there. Yeah. But um, but we used to go to St.

Zia 36:10

Augustine, Florida. Oh, St. Augustine's beautiful too, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Heather 36:15

Um, so I'm gonna say neither Ocean City, Maryland, nor Ocean City, Jersey as well, because they're equal. Yeah, okay. I would happily go to either and spend the weekend, spend the week at either one. They're yeah, they're both, they're very different, but they're very the same.

Zia 36:34

Yep. So I I know you put on here it says, you know, MD, and I just kept thinking Ocean McDonald's. I mean, if there was McDonald's in the ocean, I'd freaking be there five seconds. That's where I would be.

Heather 36:51

No, it's ocean city O C M D. Yeah, I know O C N J. No, I know. I did, but you put so many O's on cats. Oh, I I know uh Kate's, yeah, I know Kate's thing I said cat. Why did I say cat? I don't know. It's it's the it's the cough drops I'm eating because I keep choking over here. Yeah, yeah.

Zia 37:15

I'm so sorry, I keep making you laugh.

Heather 37:18

They're getting to my head. But yeah. One day I'll take a picture of our our notes and post it for everybody because you guys can see it in the background in some of our pictures, but yeah, but if you only saw it, because sometimes they're just words that don't even make a full sentence, and other times it's like a paragraph. Yeah, yeah. Especially if I'm typing you do seem to type more than me because we agreed it was gonna be bullets. Do you remember what a bullet is? It's you know, dot with words. No, see, I can't even shut up typing. We did initially we had it different colors. We were doing um you were green and I was purple. Is that how we did it?

Zia 38:01

Uh, I think I was like a turquoise blue and you were purple.

Heather 38:05

Yeah, but we could never find the right color. No, we did it one, we did it one or two, and then we couldn't find the color to match it again, and then it got green.

Zia 38:13

Forget it.

Heather 38:14

It was hard. So now it's in green. I'm not sure why we left it green or how it's not green. Yeah, but I'm okay with it. I'm okay with it too.

Zia 38:22

Yeah, yeah. It tells us to go, not stop. Look at you! Look at me just coming up rapid, rapid fire today.

Heather 38:34

Oh my goodness. So we're gonna have a guest next week.

Zia 38:39

Hopefully, yes. I'm hoping we do. Yeah, so um, my daughter star is gonna see if she can fit us into her schedule because she does have a very busy schedule. Yeah, and actually, I think that's what gave us a little uh technical difficulty because she was trying to call in to me. Oh, is that what happened? Oh no! Yeah, she was just reminding me that you know, hello, I'm here. No.

Heather 39:03

Um well, no, she's reminding you that you're not supposed to be recording your podcast right now, you're supposed to be doing something else. Cooking.

Zia 39:10

Yes, I'm supposed to be cooking, yes. Um, so uh yeah, and we're trying to get her on here because there is a art show that she is in in New Jersey, which I told her, not that any of her other art shows meant nothing to me, but the fact that she said it was in Jersey and it's Asbury Park, it's just like I was like, I don't know what that's I know.

Heather 39:33

Well, and this is the first show she's been in actively in since we started the podcast. Yes, yes, because she was in a show when we were starting and that ended, and I don't think she's been in one since.

Zia 39:45

No, no. So yeah, so I was very excited that I was in Jersey. So um I did post it on my mom's my mom Joyce's memorial page just in case anybody wanted to go that was around Jersey. Um, but yeah, so hopefully we can have her on and she can talk about it and then talk about some of the stuff that she's been up to. Yeah. And uh we'll get to talk to her.

Choosing Better Circles And Honesty

Heather 40:08

That'll be so fun. And we didn't forget, I know we talked about last week recording, changing the recording for the intro and outro. Yes, we're gonna do it. Um, but I got sick and we decided that I obviously guess you guys right, we're taking turns being sick. So hopefully after I'm done with this cold, we'll both be healthy and we can re-record. We didn't want sick voices on the recording. Um, and since I've coughed, I don't even know. I what four four cough drops this whole podcast. So trying to keep myself from choking. But we'll get it recorded. We didn't forget, we are gonna change it, we're gonna update it, we're gonna fix it. Um, and quick travel topic. Eliza and Alec are on their way to Iceland right now. Love it. Yep, they're on their way to Iceland, so uh I don't have I mean that's for our travel section, but that's okay.

Zia 41:01

Yeah, very good. Yeah, I'm not traveling anywhere for a while, so that's good.

Heather 41:07

No, I'm I'm not travel well back and forth to New York, but I just secretly was in New York. Um actually Ali texted me to see what she should bring this weekend, and she goes, Why are you in Troy? And I'm like, Why are you stalking me? Right, right. But my mom had a doctor appointment, so I took her, I went with her to the doctor and came home today, just in and out.

Zia 41:34

Um, but yeah, so and and actually bringing up that topic will just say something funny. Um, one time Heather had me, you know, gave me permission to follow her, and then she's like, How come you're not sharing your location with me? And I say, You don't need to know where I am. I do need to know where you are.

Heather 41:53

Next time I see Zachariah, I'm having a conversation. Why, why, why? What makes you so special? Yeah, why do you get to follow her and I don't?

Zia 42:05

That's great.

Heather 42:06

But on that note, we should probably call it here. Absolutely. We love everybody. Thank you so much. Thank you for dealing with my cough and my my illness. I'm so sorry. I wish I wasn't coughing through the whole thing, but yeah, I'm sorry, I can't cancel her.

Zia 42:22

She's my other half on this. I can't no, nope. We did make a promise, even in our intro. We will be here.

Heather 42:29

We will be here, and and you were here sick. You were you weren't coughing, but you you were so congested. You sounded different. Yeah, I'm not super congested, I'm just coughing.

Zia 42:41

So I'm hoping next week we're healthy, and absolutely we'll get new topics intro and out.

Heather 42:48

So and yeah, hopefully we can do that this week. Yeah, but if not, we will get there. It's just we're waiting for voices and everything. Yeah, otherwise, we love you all.

Zia 42:59

Thank you so much for listening. Yeah, and we'll see you at episode 16. Woo! 16. Yeah, 16. And stay tuned because we got some extras. Got some extras. We do. Oh my goodness. Surprises, surprises. Wow. All right, peace out, everyone.