Getting the Elephants off Our Chest:

Anxiety introduced itself early to Caris and paralyzed much off her life growing up.  Its grip almost became deadly as the pressure of perfection morphed into unhealthy control challenges.  Caris turned her crippling anxiety into powerful books for children, tween, teens and adults. 

Please visit https://www.carissnider.com/

For books, resources and so much more!!

Welcome to the BRAVE pod

Where we have conversations that matter to grow a task force that fights against the spiritual trafficking of our girls. We are Bold Redeemed Anointed Victorious and Eternal and it’s race against the enemy for her heart. The time is now to go on the Great Rescue, I am your host Amber Johns, let’s talk about it. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:25

All right, guys. Thank you for joining us. Um, today we have a wonderful guest in Keris. And so I'm really interested in this conversation because we're going to tackle some things that I don't even have full understanding about, but you do. And I'm just so thankful for the books that you've written, the website that you have, the speaking that you do. Um, I've stalked you well to just learn and just understand like your heart for the Lord, um, your heart for the next generation, for young, um, all generations, like all of your books, you know, apply to different age groups. So, but before we dig in, um just give us a little background about who you are and um just a little bit about your journey.

SPEAKER_00 1:01

Absolutely. So, as you said, my name is Karis Snyder. If you hear it, you are correct in thinking, is she from the South? I am. Uh I am I live in Alabama with my family. My husband and I have been married, goodness, it'll be 22 years here in a couple of months. And we have two daughters. I have two daughters who are athletes, one who is a junior in high school and one who is a seventh grader. And um, I graduated from the University of Alabama with a degree in child development. So I've had uh many years of working with children and students of all ages. But now in my background, I am a speaker and an author. I have seven books and I just traveled the country talking quite a bit about anxiety and depression and healthy biblical coping skills and how to respond to that. And a lot of that came from my own personal journey. Um, anxiety and depression almost took my life about 15 years ago. So I am passionate about helping every generation see that God hears them, he sees them, and he loves them and they can bring all the things that they struggle with to his feet. He wants to hear all those stories. So that's what my heart and passion really is.

SPEAKER_01 2:15

Yeah. Can you remember like going back? Like, do you have a first memory of like, ooh, this is more than just I'm a little worried about my test the next day? Like, can you go back and now looking back rear view mirror, ooh, that was the moment I knew something was different.

SPEAKER_00 2:31

Yeah. So I I love the way that you you formed that. Cause like you said, looking in a rear view mirror, of course, when you're you're in it or when you're young, or as I tell students, when you when we grew up in the late 1900s, okay, you talk about a terrible way to put it, right? I know, but it's true. You guys know it's true. We didn't get to talk about anxiety and depression. I mean, we just had to, I mean, there was just no room for that, and we didn't really have all the things. But I for me looking back, it was honestly when I was in the first grade. I um, so I was born with a mild form of cerebral palsy or cerebral palsy, however you might say it, in the left side of my body. And it's so it affected my arm and my leg, and specifically in my arm, I would hold my left arm up by my side. Those muscles were not working, they were very tight. So if you were to think about if you go for a walk outside, you swing your arms naturally back and forth. You don't think about that. I could not do that with my left arm. Now, my parents never treated me uh any differently from my twin brother who did not have this disability. That they always said to me, Your disability will not get to define your ability in your life. I still remember that here, even now to this day. So they didn't treat me very differently. But in in my classroom once in first grade, a fellow classmate he gathered everyone around me and he said, Caris, why do you look like that? And he held his arms up like a bunny rabbit and hopped around me and said, That's what I looked like. So, of course, everyone laughed and pointed. And I remember that moment, I felt crushed and I felt so sad because I was different from everyone else. And I went home that day. I didn't tell my parents, I didn't tell my teachers, and I remember my heart racing. I mean, it was just beating so fast at night. But when I went to sleep, my thoughts were just running of what ifs, what if this happens again, what if it's worse. And I believe with all my heart, that was my first real moment of dealing with anxiety. But again, because we didn't talk about it, because I didn't know what it was. Unfortunately, I taught myself early on to deal with those big emotions, to deal with that anxiety, to push it down, to hide it. Uh, to honestly, that began my journey of becoming a master of the mask and just trying to only do things that I knew I could succeed at, or just kind of hiding in the background. So that is the first moment looking back that that I think that that anxiety really peeked its head through and I didn't know how to respond or deal. So I just became just shove it down. You're good, you're fine, move on.

SPEAKER_01 5:13

Wow, like what a memory. So clear all these years later, too. It's like the perfect storm for anxiety. If if you didn't have it or if it wasn't apparent, that'll do it. So yeah, that's that's crazy. So as you as you navigate and you get older, like what does that become? Because you're right. Like, I mean, I feel like we're close to an age, like we didn't have those words. So what happens now? Like, seven, I mean, I feel like those things really become apparent in like junior high and all of these things as you hit adolescence and puberty and all of the things that come just as a normal, maybe without this extra anxious feeling. So now what? Like, how did how did you navigate that?

SPEAKER_00 5:51

Yeah, I, you know, even in middle school and high school, I put this pressure of perfection on myself. And if you are a parent listening to this, maybe you see your your daughter, even your son going through this. You with anxiety, there there comes this thing of trying to control what can I control and how can I make it look like I'm in control? So that pressure of perfection, you know, in my schoolwork and being a leader, um, and all these things, making decisions without help. I thought help was a bad thing. I thought help was like, if you will, a four-letter word. Now I know it's a four-letter word, but you know what I mean by a four-letter word, like it was a bad word and that I didn't need to ask for help. And so, you know, even in the middle school and high school, like my school work, I just put that pressure on myself. We lost a classmate uh in a car wreck when I was in the ninth grade. And I I didn't think I thought it was wrong to have those bad emotions. Does that make sense? As a believer, as a follower of Christ, I got it wrong in thinking that if you're sad or if you're grieving that that I was failing God, I don't I don't know if that makes sense, but but it makes total sense. Yeah. So because I felt that way, I didn't give myself room to grieve or do all those things. So by the time I got into college, living under that pressure, living under that weight of that mask, and then I got married early. I was 22 when my husband and I got married. And um, I couldn't, by the time you know, we were in those adult years, it was like my body was saying, there is no more room, no more room to push this down, no more room, you know, to hide. And I remember I would just at these random moments, I could be driving down the road, I could be at church, I could be, you know, at the grocery store, and my heart would just be beating out of my chest. It truly felt like elephants just jumping up and down on my chest, but no one could see what I was going through. I would feel breathless, like I would pass out at any moment. Um, sleep became a long-lost friend because I was on that hamster wheel of all the catastrophe thinking, worst-case thinking um scenarios. And it caught up with me. That anxiety and that depression caught up with me. And I have to be very honest here. In that moment in my life, in that season of my life, my husband and I, we were leaving worship at our church. Uh, I would, you know, be there to pray for young women or college students who maybe wanted advice or prayer. But also in that time, I was one who was a part of the church that didn't believe anxiety and depression were real. Um, my voice of encouragement, if you will, would be something like this. If you came to me, I would be like, hey, Amber, you just need to pray harder. You just need to trust God more. Read your Bible more. Have you guys ever heard these things? You know, and and if I knew you really, really well, I would just say to you, hey, suck it up, buttercup, and move on. Now, I know that in no form of the Bible, no translation did Jesus ever say, suck it up, buttercup. Like that is not what he says. And I I learned very quickly as I began to just really be isolated with that anxiety and and pulled away. It is a very real struggle. And you know what? I was reading my Bible, I was praying, I was crying out to God, but I wouldn't let anybody in. I wouldn't ask for help because I was so embarrassed, I was so ashamed, I was so um defeated that I was struggling with this thing that no one could see. I didn't realize that anxiety was it was and is the number one mental health struggle for all age groups. And I bought the lie. We buy this lie when we're in the middle of anxiety and depression, that I was the only one. That if I let anyone know that I'm struggling, God won't use me anymore in the church, my friends will leave me, uh my family will turn their back on me. And so I just continue to push it down and push it down. And I chose to numb the pain of anxiety by my by my adult years, because I still wasn't acknowledging that it was there. I chose to starve the pain. I chose to try to numb it that way. People will choose a multitude of things, uh, maybe busy busyness at work or within their sport or school. Uh, it could be social media, scrolling, or drugs or alcohol or inappropriate relationship. So I chose food to starve it. And uh I ate less than a thousand calories a day. I worked out hours a day, desperately just wanting to look like everything was okay, but I was really struggling on the inside. And the moment that um I began to kind of see more was going on that my body was really trying to signal to me, I was actually in my home. I was sitting on my couch. My daughter at that time, who's 17, she was, goodness, she was probably three or four at that time, living her best life in her playroom, organizing her toys. Now, we don't love to organize anymore, but that was her thing then. Um, and I was having the worst anxiety attack that I had experienced to that moment. I thought I was having a heart attack. I thought that she was gonna come in there and find her mommy dead or passed out on the floor. So I called my mom. She was a safe person for me, and she told me to go to the to the doctor immediately. And uh I went. I knew if I didn't, at almost 30 years old, she was gonna come. My mom was gonna come make me go to the doctor and the sweet nurse who was hooking me up to the EKG machine. I remember her face. I had tears in my eyes, and I just remember telling her, I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with me because you begin to feel like a burden when that anxiety and depression are there. And I just apologized to her. And she said something that was so pivotal in my journey, and she told me, You're not a burden. I'm here to help you today. And that was really a C planted in me to know that it was okay to ask for help. It was actually the right thing and the strong thing to do. And so that began that journey for me. The doctor came in and was like, you know, your heart is fine, you're having an anxiety attack. I still wasn't ready to admit that that struggle. And I actually had the nerve to tell that doctor he was wrong. But um that began that journey for me from anxiety into depression. You know, anxiety makes you feel very froggy, very jumpy. Whereas depression, it feels more very foggy. Which way is up, which way is down, how do I move, how do I go from there? So that was kind of the that journey from anxiety, anxiety only to anxiety and depression for me.

SPEAKER_01 12:30

Wow. I think you touched on something going back a little bit, which comes up in so many of these interviews, especially with believers, you know, Christians, where there's like that double shame. That's what we call it, like the double shame, like the shame of what you're struggling with, and then the shame that you should know better. Like I'm a Christian, um, I I love Jesus, Jesus loves me, and this is still a struggle. So how embarrassing. Or even am I even like saved? Am I a good Christian? Like all of those things. Did you struggle kind of in that same like here's the shame of just like this, this is hard for me? And then also I should know better because I'm a Christian.

SPEAKER_00 13:05

Yes, I love that you call that double shame. I sometimes would refer to it uh when I speak as the should bully. You should know better, you should have it all together, you should be trusting God. Like that's kind of how it felt like to me. And um, I tell people very carefully, I'm like, look, we have to stop shoulding on ourselves. Okay, I said that very, very carefully, even in my southern accent. But it was, it was like a it was almost like a ping pong ball going back and forth of that that shame and that struggle, not realizing, you know, or or sometimes when we this is why I think it's important and God reminded us to hide his word in our heart because Jesus told us in this world you will have trouble. So the trouble is going to come. The struggles are going to come. And if you uh, you know, even just in writing the books and studying scripture, there are so many scriptures in there about casting our anxiety on him, you know, making sure that we take our thoughts captive. So God knew that that was going to be a struggle for so many of us. And so um, even still to this day, can I be honest and say I still have those moments where that double shame comes back, that shit bully comes back. And it's uh God in his goodness reminds me, hey, that's not me. There is no condemnation in me. Um, let's continue to work on changing our thought process, changing uh this process on how we respond to this. And uh knowing that I can just be raw and transparent with God. I can come as I am with these thoughts and that he is for me and not against me. That truly has helped me because I did for the longest time believe that lie that God was gonna be disappointed in me. I hate disappointing people. I hate letting people down. You know, I hate, I didn't want to disappoint God. And he just reminded me, he lifted my head and he was like, No, I am here for you. We're gonna walk through this together. You are not alone. And he has even still to this day, he's never left me. He's never made me feel like he was disappointed in me. Um, he's he has just continued to help me to grow all the way through this process.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

Yeah. Do you have a moment that you feel like this was just your lowest? You know, like I don't ever want to go back there again. Thank God he intervened. Is there a point for you that you were like, because I I feel like if you've had this journey at all, there's probably a rock bottom point to this, um, where either you stay rock bottom or you you make a climb or you don't, but like what was that for you?

SPEAKER_00 15:35

Absolutely. It was September 2011 for me. We had found out a few weeks earlier that I was pregnant, uh, which was a miracle uh within itself. I had to be uh on infertility medication to be to get pregnant with my first daughter, daughter. And uh when we found out I was pregnant, my doctor, super, super gentle and nice with me. I might have weighed 100 pounds, maybe. And she said, Kiris, look, for the sake of the baby, you have to eat. I don't care if you eat donuts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, just eat. And in that moment, two things happen for me. First of all, I think, you know, for most of us as women, we have that mama bear instinct in us. Like I will fight for my kids, I will fight for their friends in a way that I may not fight for myself. I will stand in the gap for them. But second, I mean, if a doctor says you can eat donuts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, you eat all the donuts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And and guys, I ate a lot of donuts. I still, it's favorite, favorite dessert, even still to this day. And over about a uh eight-week process, I gained about six pounds, which was really a big deal. But I ended up having a miscarriage. I lost the baby, and that was rock bottom for me. And my husband and I, you know, we went out to to our car in that dark uh parking lot and just wept. And I just kept, you know, it was that shame of look what you did to this little baby, to this life. And um, I truly felt in that moment that I was a burden and a bother, and that everyone would be better off without me on this earth. And um it was like I could look up or I could give up. And that scared me to find myself there in the bottom. And I it was like God just whispered to my soul, look up, look up. And when I looked up and I acknowledged that I was struggling, that I was just really going through a hard time, all those lies of gonna, I'm gonna be alone, no one's gonna understand, they were proven to be lies. Um, in fact, I had many uh friends and family say, Hey, me too. I I'm struggling with anxiety and depression too. Um and they didn't leave me, they didn't turn their back on me. Uh, God didn't say I can't use you anymore. Like it's amazing how he wastes nothing in our life. And he uses the messes and the broken pieces. That's where ministry really begins. That's where people begin to see God moving and working. And I found a counselor, uh, uh my doctor helped me. I needed some medication in my situation, and that began a journey and a process for me of healing and restoration and just learning these skills that I could begin to apply to my life daily and how to respond to the anxiety and depression. And I could finally take this mask off of perfection, being a master of the mask, and I could just be me. I could just be who God called me me to be. I didn't have to hide anymore. And even though that was rock bottom, it was a freeing situation for me over time. And I have to say, you know, I did have that miscarriage in September of 2011, but I had my youngest daughter, Allie Grace, uh, in September 2012. So it was like God just redeemed what was taken, redeemed what was lost. And I know those stories are always different for everyone, but um a Grace, you know, it means gift from God. That's why that her name is there is Grace, because it is a reminder of his gifts and his goodness, even when things don't feel feel good.

SPEAKER_01 19:07

Yeah, that's that's there's so much to that. I feel like we could we could go about another two hours and get a couple of those layers. But I mean, one, thank you for sharing all of that. Um, I know that's not easy to kind of keep going back there, but also uh you talk about community and so we talk about that a lot. Um, just having that, I mean, in brave, like that's all we're trying to do is form discipleship and community because of this. Like once people get into a group setting or even share with a friend or a mentor or somebody, and they're like, Well, yeah, me too. And all of a sudden you're like, You too, what you? And it's like we do, we have such a performance in us that we want everybody to think we've got it. And when you project that, then everybody else is like, Well, me too, you know, I I gotta do that too. So you really like you've touched on so many things that I'm just like, yeah, this is so profound to have community and all the other things too. But once you invite people into those safe spaces, those hard spaces, all of a sudden it's like the enemy is good with isolation. If he can isolate us, maybe he can pick us off one by one. So I appreciate you saying that. Um, so as we kind of go into, you know, you've got this journey behind you, and like you've you've really wrestled with God, I'm sure, through all of this. Um, you're an author and a speaker. So I think what you did was take your pain and put it to words. Um, so I love, I mean, we have them all here. I'm gonna do this. Let's see if I can do them all. Like, look at all these cool. I'll be impressed. Look at you. So, I mean, you went to work. Um, tell me a little bit about like, did you always think you were gonna be a writer? Have you always been a writer? Like, have you been about right?

SPEAKER_00 20:42

So, you know what's funny? Writing was never in the top 10 things that I wanted to do in my life. Like it was just never on my list. I wanted to have my own daycare and be in charge. I I like to be in charge, you know, to be, you know, the leader of things. And you know, when I graduated from the University of Alabama, I got the opportunity to work with children, even teach college students. And God let me have what I wanted, a daycare center. Like I got to run my own. And I did that for an entire year. And then I said, okay, Lord, no, it's just not what I wanted to do. The children were great, but as a parent, I feel like I can say this. Parent, the parents were hard. I mean, they were they were difficult. Um, so then it just began after, you know, the Lord kind of pulled me out of this journey of that pit of anxiety and depression, doors started opening for me to speak. I I've always loved to speak and to encourage. And so I just kind of followed the Lord on that path. I wasn't really sure what I was doing there. And um, people started to ask me, do you have resources, you know, that we can take home with us after hearing you speak? And I didn't. I didn't really know how to do that. And my husband was actually the one who encouraged me to go to a writer conference, a writer speakers conference. And he actually gifted me that for my birthday. It was in 2019. I went to a writer speaker conference in Grand Rapids, Michigan. I had written, I was trying to see if I had one here on my on my desk, and I don't, just this little 10 day little booklet. Um, and I did it on campus. So, you too guys, if you want to be a writer, you just take a like a little mini step here. You can do it. And it was, you know, anxiety elephants, because I I make that reference quite a bit when I speak for the anxiety, feeling like an elephant on your chest. And I took that little 10-day booklet and sold quite a bit through my website, and people asked for more. So I went to that conference. And um, my first book that I wrote was the 31-day devotional anxiety elephants for adults. And it released December 17th, 2019, and then 2020. And it was like anxiety just took over in every aspect, you know, of our life, you know, for every age group. We really saw that, you know, almost as a pandemic as well. We we saw the the dangers there. Um, and then it just kind of morphed in into that, into all the other books. You know, I don't know if you've ever done this. I told told God, okay, I'll do one. And then I want to go back to what I want to do, you know, why don't we do that? Why don't we we do that? Uh, but I did. And my daughters actually asked me if I would write books with words that they could understand. Oh. And it was in those moments that God reminded me of those struggles of anxiety that I had when I was younger. How much more could that have benefited me if I would have known words to use or you know, things to have those resources? And so the children's books, the books for teens, tweens, all of those were kind of birthed um through that, through that process to really give give language, to give those biblical strategies for all age groups, because we all need it. Everyone does.

SPEAKER_01 23:59

Yeah. And I think I said before we even started recording, like I I am not one, I mean, I've had anxious moments, so I I can but man, if this is what it feels like all the time, that's horrifying. So um, but like when you said elephants on your chest, which I love, and this is the one I'm I've loved, like her children's book, Elephants on Your Chest. But what a great language to give a child that it, yes, it's heavy. I don't like it. I can't get it off my chest by myself. That's right.

SPEAKER_00 24:25

It's so good. And this one I've love, I mean, again, I was a teacher, but and I really love the children's book. But even in there, there is a place where the the uh main character, her name is Allie, by the way. My young daughter's name is Allie. She begged me to be the main character. Uh, my oldest daughter said, You're not allowed to use my name at all. So I did not, but the main character in there, she asked for help. And the mom helps her. There's a doctor that helps her, her school counselor, but the mom tells her that this was a very brave thing to do, the right thing to do. Can you imagine for children to hear it is brave and right to ask for help? How free is that for a young girl or maybe even a young boy who's playing basketball or football to know I it's okay for me to ask for help. And so, um, so I'm I was really glad that we were able to to really kind of pinpoint some easy strategies that kids could really begin to start applying to their life.

SPEAKER_01 25:24

Yeah. And if you're on, if you're watching this on YouTube, like I mean, even the illustrations, there it is. Hell yeah. But the illustrations are beautiful, like it's it's so great. It's so great. Um, and also you have these other two that I have right here, um, which I I love. So for teens and then devotional. So I mean, just so and the theme is there for all of them, anxiety elephants throughout as you get older. So I love that you've stayed with that theme because that is a very easy word to use, I think for people who don't have words. Yes. This is what it feels like. So when you even like for me, I'm like, ooh, I could I can actually imagine the weight of something on your chest like that. Like that's amazing. So um, and then the other one that you have, which of course I think that's what I first saw as just a female athlete and working with FCA. Um, and that's how we originally got connected was um this for for athletes, female athletes. So you have daughters who are athletes, so I'm sure there's a lot of personal reason for this. Um, tell me a little bit how this came together because you co-authored it. Um authored, yes.

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Uh Del Didjway is the co-author on the book. And uh fun fact, Dell is actually my agent. He's the one that's helped me get all the other contracts for my books. And he's written a plethora of amazing sports books uh as well. And he, you know, had this opportunity come up to write a book for uh for girls, you know, based on uh female athletes. And he asked if I would do it. And I was praying about it, asking my family about it. And my daughters, again, actually were like, Mom, you tell us all the time, you know, do it afraid, face things that you don't know, you know, that you're uncertain about to just try. And they were like, this would be awesome for you to write about female athletes and God's move in their life. And and so they really gave me that courage and that push uh to move forward. And so, like you said, I really was passionate about this project. It came about about we really started on it about uh almost two years ago, really, you know, from signing the contract to beginning to find the stories and having athletes in my life and getting the opportunity to talk to a lot of female athletes who do, goodness, they deal with so much anxiety and so much pressure, you know, to perform and not fail and not make a mistake and not lose their spot. You know, they they just deal with all these many mental, mental struggles and to have an opportunity to share stories with them of female athletes fueled by faith who are looking to God in the midst of injury, in the midst of tragedy, uh, in the midst of these hardships and how they overcame how God helped them and then to give those action steps. I'm a really big action step person. Yes, let's talk about the story, but let's have some action steps in there to really be able to find those action steps to give them to apply to their life. Um, I thought it was really, really important. And and my co-author surprised me. I didn't know he was gonna do this, but he actually interviewed my daughters. Oh they are two of the the 52 stories in there. And uh it's just really neat to see um, even you know, for there's multiple, there's older women in there, there's college students, and then you have to have those young, young girls as well to see how they shared how God has worked in their life to share their story. It was such such a sweet thing just to see to have that and to see that. Um, so it was as I did my let's see, research on a lot of these women to just find them all across the world. Sure. Wanting, yeah, to just, you know, even in those hard moments, they're looking to God or even like you know, we talked about looking back in the rearview mirror, they see how God helped them through those situations. Um, I I just love it. And I just think it really is a good resource for for our girls, not to look at humans and put them on an elevated platform, but to see how God will use sport in their life to reveal his goodness and to to even use their life, their story to go reach others that majority of us we don't get that opportunity to do in that way.

SPEAKER_01 29:20

Yeah. Well, even just like you said, right? It's also like, oh, so you too. So here's 52 stories that say, and I love there, there's a title one eyes up. I just saw it. So I got about halfway through um before like talking to you. And it it is, it's it's spot on, like all of these different stories. And I think that's that also alleviates some of the isolation we put ourselves in because when you start reading about everybody else, um, you're like, oh, okay, like I'm not the only one. So this is this is really good. I mean, we deal with female athletes all the time, and this is performance, performance and performance anxiety are like top, top notch, especially as you get it to the collegiate level or trying to get at the collegiate level, um, the pressure that they put on themselves. And understood, you know, I understand why, but like just trying to navigate that with them. This is this is an amazing series of just books and knowledge that you have to help them navigate. So yeah. I love that your girls are in this. I did not know that.

SPEAKER_00 30:13

That's right, so they're towards the back. So you the cool thing about it is you yeah, you don't have to read it in order. They're like, uh, he wrote the odd numbers, I wrote the even. So they're probably like 49 and 51. They're kind of you know, back there in the back. But I did uh get the privilege. I after I did my research and I wrote the book, I had reached out to several of the athletes that I wrote about. And two of them uh responded to me very quickly. One was Kiara Reinhardt. And if you're a volleyball fan, uh she played for Creighton University, she's playing pro volleyball now. She shared her story of overcoming, you know, just a back injury, back surgery, how her teammates were helpful in that. Uh, and then Carrie Dinnigan, she is a Paralympian from Great Britain. She has uh cerebral palsy in her lower extremities and her legs. And so she shares her story of, you know, how God has just helped her through that. Um, and both of them even shared a little bit about how we compare ourselves, you know, the them as athletes compare compare themselves to one another and you know, just that that level, the mental health aspect, you know, dealing with that anxiety. How do we, how do we deal with the anxiety? Because sometimes you can't avoid it. So how do I play through it? How do I show up, you know, when it comes, or what are some things that I can do? So it was really interesting to just hear from them at their levels of of play, how they are responding in those difficult situations.

SPEAKER_01 31:33

Yeah, no, I mean I saw I saw her. She's the one that uh wrote on the back of your book, Fear equips female athletes to shine brightly and live fearlessly in their sport and beyond. That's yeah, that's super, that's super cool. Um, and then before we close, I just I think sometimes that we can be under the illusion if we do all of the work, let's say, you know, we have all of like and you kind of alluded to it too that you still struggle. Um, it's possible that we won't conquer this in this lifetime. So to not feel, I mean, what is your encouragement like? I I do believe sometimes God's like, I'll take that away. And then we, you know, eating disorders are one some will always struggle, and some were like, it ended on this day, and then he never struggled again. So can you just encourage what's your encouragement for people that are like, I don't know if I'm ever gonna get out from under this until I'm with Jesus? Like, what is your encouragement? Shame, doubt, struggle, all of that. Because I I think you said you still have moments, you still struggle, and you've you've, you know, you've delved into this. This is your profession, you speak about it. Um, can you just end with that and just a little encouragement for the girls?

SPEAKER_00 32:32

Absolutely. I would say to the girls, you know, or to whoever is listening, uh, even if uh you never get rid of the anxiety, even if, you know, you're you're still in that struggle, don't avoid living your life. Go thrive. Think of it like this. If you think of a glow stick, all right, and I'm holding a glow stick in my hand, it's not glowing, it's not moving, it's not doing anything that it can do until what? Until it's broken, until it is bent, and then it shines brightly. It is activated. Its light is activated by the fight. So when that fight and anxiety comes, Psalms 94, 19 says, when anxiety is great within me, your comfort brings me joy. So run to God in the midst of that and take a deep breath, look for the good and keep going one step at a time. Focus your thoughts on what is true around me, not the what-ifs, not the things that you can't control, but what you can control and remind yourself every step that you take, this is for my good. This is gonna be for my good. I'm gonna get to help someone else. And the more you take steps, the more you move forward, the more that you don't avoid and you don't isolate and you keep moving forward, you're building that perseverance muscle. You're building that hope inside of you. And when you get further and further along, you are gonna have it uh for good in your life. And you are gonna be able to help others and be that rope of hope for others along the way.

SPEAKER_01 33:59

Karis, I appreciate you so much. You've done, you've done I love your books. I love all of this. Um, Karis Snyder.com is where people can find you. So that's also gonna be in the show notes and your books basically where everyone is sold on Amazon either. Yeah. And on your site, I know you can find them there. So I just thank you for being with us and just sharing this. It was very vulnerable and raw, but I think so needed to open up the conversation even more. So thank you for being with us today.

SPEAKER_00 34:24

Thank you for having me. Yeah.