Symptom Karmic Lesson: Honesty

How to begin to heal the Symptom Karmic Lesson of honesty

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Hello everyone, I hope you've had a beautiful week. In today's episode, I want to talk about the symptom karmic lesson of honesty and how we can go about beginning to learn the lesson. This is a difficult symptom karmic lesson to learn in today's society. This was a symptom karmic lesson that I personally had to learn, and it was a very frustrating one for me because my learning of this lesson was through my severe ego degradation, so it took quite a while for my 3D to match up to my 5D. Meaning, after my ego degradation, I was not able to lie anymore without immediately stating out loud, that's a lie. As if my being was rejecting it outright. However, my body was still going into fight or flight mode when my brain thought I'd be yelled at for telling the truth. And I was also encountering more lying from others than I had in my entire life. So let's talk about honesty and how we can move towards that and remove the obstacles that make it more difficult to heal. The first thing that you need to understand is why you lie. You lie for the same reason that anyone else lies. You are biologically programmed to protect yourself, your body, your mind, and your best interests. This isn't selfish, it's survival. However, in today's society, when we no longer need to hunt food or build shelter or fight off the neighboring tribe to live throughout the night, the brain has changed to create a fight or flight response to egoic stressors instead of biological ones. For example, being in a monogamous relationship, which is the framework for most anglicized civilizations, can become the brain's raison d'être, and therefore we will lie if we view that under threat in any way. From the most timid end of the spectrum, this could be something as simple as getting yelled at for not doing the laundry, so you make up a reason as to why you couldn't. To the biggest end of the spectrum, like creating shell companies in your spouse's name, embezzling and omitting this information from your spouse, to any shade in between. Any example that you choose, even though you may not understand them logically, are all due to fear of danger. Fear of danger is legitimately the only reason a lie is told, no matter how big or small. Now the problem is, if we have been lying for a long time, it's become a habit, and the brain creates a lie so quickly that it may be easier to lie than to tell the truth. And this is where mindfulness comes in, which is the first step to healing the symptom karmic lesson of honesty. Mindfulness is going to become your most important tool in learning honesty because you need to be aware of the propensity to lie and actively choose not to, no matter how scared your ego is. The easiest way of starting this is by saying no to someone when it's easier to say yes. Meaning, if you feel pressured to do something, say something, feel something, think something, pause, take note, and be honest with yourself first and foremost. Then, state how you really feel. The answer is no instead of yes. Now, if this is already difficult for you to do, chances are you're going to want to justify your response so that the other person understands where you're coming from, or to lessen the blow of your rejection. I encourage you to try to not justify yourself, but instead be succinctly honest instead. So if you're asked to go to a dinner party and you don't want to go, your answer would first be, thank you for the invitation, but I'm going to have to decline. If you get asked why, it is perfectly acceptable and reasonable to express succinctly and honestly, because I don't want to. There is nothing else needed to be said. If the other person doesn't like your answer and they attempt to persuade you, utilize mindfulness and recognize that it is not your ego that is the issue in this case, but theirs. You were honest, you were forthcoming, and you laid down invisible boundaries. You did your job. Try not to justify yourself more when the other person scrambles to change your mind. It's your time, your feelings, and your choice, and you have every right to them. But generally, I will say, when you tell someone you don't want to do something, they will usually be taken slightly aback and say something along the lines of, oh, okay, fair enough. You have done nothing wrong by being honest. No one can fault you for being honest, but they can always fault you for lying. These small gestures and honesty will make the transition to absolute honesty much easier for your ego to learn and comprehend that it's safe. Lastly, it's important to realize that when you lie in any form, omission, bald face lying, or white lies, it is manipulation. You are lying because your brain is screaming, danger, to your ego. But dishonesty is always an egoic choice, and lying to someone else is manipulating the situation in order for you to feel better. You are gaslighting the other person. You are constructing a 3D picture for their ego that is not a true summary of your ego's reality. You are not giving them all of the quote-unquote facts. As a culture, society, species, we need to get out of this habit of lying in order to protect ourselves, believing that dishonesty is nicer or softer or more humane. Lying is never any of those things. And instead of cherishing nice words that the ego wants to hear, let's get in the habit of giving the ego a dosage of unrestrained truth when needed. That doesn't mean you should go around telling everyone what you think of them or what you think of every situation. Use discernment. But it does mean that you can practice honesty with yourself and with other egos when asked. I have been told many times that I'm rough or brutally honest or seem uncaring because I state things matter-of-factly. But guess what? When those people who have been hurt or surprised by my honesty get gaslighted by others, they always come back and state, you are the only person, Alex, I trust because I know you'll tell me the truth. Truth is, of course, subjective, but lying hurts more than it helps. When you begin to practice true honesty, you may notice that more people lie to you. And we can look at this in two ways. The first is that everyone always lied to you, but you just didn't notice as much because you were participating. The second is that the higher self is showing you the lesson you are working on and testing you to keep you on course, even though it's easier to give in. Don't give in. Learn the lesson, and most importantly, be honest with yourself always. Until next week, all of my best and highest vibrations to you.