That three letter word that can completely erase every compliment, and raising decent human beings!!

Have you ever noticed how one tiny three-letter word can completely change the meaning of a sentence?

This week on A Little Unhinged, we’re talking about the power of the word “but” and why it has a way of erasing every compliment, encouragement, or positive thing that comes before it. Whether you’re talking to your spouse, your kids, your coworkers, or even yourself, that one little word can completely shift how a message is received.

We also dive into a conversation that’s becoming more relevant every day—raising decent human beings. What values matter most? How do we teach kindness, accountability, and respect in a world that often seems to be missing those things?

And of course, we couldn’t leave out one of our favorite topics: work ethic. Amber and Brittney discuss why they were raised to believe that hard work isn’t optional, why they take pride in giving 100%, and why it sometimes feels like that mindset is becoming harder to find today.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why the word “but” can unintentionally cancel out a compliment.
• Better ways to communicate encouragement and constructive feedback.
• The importance of raising respectful, responsible, and kind humans.
• Why accountability still matters.
• Our thoughts on work ethic, personal responsibility, and doing your best—even when no one is watching.
• Plenty of our usual unfiltered conversations, laughs, and relatable stories along the way.

As always, thank you for being here and doing life with us. 💙

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:40

Good morning, good evening, good night, whatever time it is that you're listening, and welcome back to a little unhinged podcast. I'm glad that you're joining us today. Hey y'all. What's up, what's up? What's been going on with everybody? Um, hope y'all have had a great week. And so, really quick, we have a small favor that we need to ask of y'all. If you were enjoying listening to us, um, would you just go hit the follow button on your podcast app, right, and review us? Um, we read all the comments from everything, and they really help us, and we would really appreciate it. And let's get on to the show. Um, hope everyone had a great fourth um and a great week last week. Hope everyone was safe and no accidents, hopefully, or no fireworks accidents. Hope nobody lost any um phalanges or anything. Um we had a good fourth, I would say.

SPEAKER_01 1:42

We did, we did. It's uh hot, hot very hot, yes.

SPEAKER_03 1:49

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

We did, we did. We um had a good week, I would say. I worked um three days last week, and then I had to take Atlee to New Albany Thursday for some dinner work, and uh that went well. Um and then Friday we were closed for the fourth, and we um so we had a good week.

SPEAKER_01 2:08

I had a my week started out well it was pretty heavy, but I had one of my cousins passed away. So I had a funeral on Monday and then um work. It's been extra crazy with um people changing insurance at the end of June. So it was already busy busy, but now we have extra, extra changes and discharges and all that. And then I had to go and get my babes squeezed. So if you haven't done that lately, don't forget. It's your reminder. Get your tie ties checked. Was this your first one? You have to have um you can start getting them. I think it used to be 40, but now it's 37.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

I had well, I had yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:53

Yeah, so I had one um like two years ago, and then Do they make us get one every few years? Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. So um I just um because I'd had my doctor's appointment the week before, and then they went ahead and got it scheduled and ordered and all that. So anyway, I had to go do that Wednesday, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

I guess since because I had my first one, I think, at 38. Um, and I guess since Kimberly's been gone. And I hadn't been back, maybe, is why I hadn't had to have another one. Because that would have been almost four years ago now, this year.

SPEAKER_01 3:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:36

Yeah. So and I mean she didn't mention one at my last one when I saw her, which was before in November. And I mean she didn't mention one, but it wasn't time either for like all that, because insurance, you know, all that whole deal. So I don't know. But I do need to make I I've got to make an appointment to go see her. I may try to call over there over there Monday because you know, this week is shut down week for us. Thank God it's we go back, but it's like us and the office are there, but we're not there. There's like there's nobody else there. We're not there, we're not there all day, every day. Like I won't be there Thursday because I've got some appointments made in Oxford, so I probably can't get in with her that quick, but maybe I can. I'm I'm I'm gonna call tomorrow morning.

SPEAKER_01 4:28

Um yeah, I don't know how long it takes to get in with her. I know um somebody else had called, and I think it was it could have been her, but it was one of the nurse practitioners there, and it didn't it didn't take a a really long time for her to get in.

SPEAKER_00 4:42

Yeah. I'm gonna call. I I'm gonna set her out and I'll call tomorrow morning. Um because I know it's uh I mean it's it's it's it's time to it's time to go back to see her. Um I just was waiting to know where she was, so I need to call. And she's in there where Dr. Hunt used to be or still is? Is that what you're doing? I think so. Okay. I need to you can pull it up online.

SPEAKER_01 5:05

Yeah, yeah, I just need to pull it up online and see. Yeah, website.

SPEAKER_00 5:09

Um God, what else before we got started? Oh, what else was it? Oh, I still have I forgot to wash it off.

SPEAKER_01 5:19

I know. I have mine over here. I meant to get some alcohol and get it off.

SPEAKER_00 5:23

Yeah, some makeup removers.

SPEAKER_01 5:24

Yeah, I have a Britney's is a hat. I have a um you can't see it, but I had a little uh bow, like a 4th of July little bow, uh temporary tattoo thing on. Yeah, we um I figured I would be festive today in some blue and white, but I I'm glad I didn't have them on. I could not get them to cooperate. I had some star earrings and um they I forgot about having to wear these headphones, so they wouldn't have worked.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

Oh yeah, yeah. Amber is looking on cute in her little dress. She had some little temporary um 4th of July tattoos, uh, and she and Gunnar had them on, and I was like, I want one. So I put one up here on my arm and I stick, I gotta get, I gotta get it off.

SPEAKER_01 6:02

But um Yeah, Gunner has a lot of or we have a lot of flag, flag stuff or whatever, so he had it like all on yesterday. But um, we did go and see the um big firework show at Sarda, so shout out to Brett Towes. That was it was it was really good. It was really, really good. And I parked smartly this year so I could get out of there in a hurry instead of waiting.

unknown 6:31

I'm good.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

You need a high muck or something.

SPEAKER_00 6:34

That water ran sorry, that water went down the wrong way, and I thought I was just gonna start choking.

SPEAKER_01 6:40

My bad. It's gonna get some real action on the yeah, I know the video.

SPEAKER_00 6:44

I was trying to not make like make a big coffin scene, but I thought I was supposed to have to mute myself. Uh I needed a sip of water like real bad. It was real parched, and Amber looked over at me like, what we finna do? What's going on? But yes, it yes, it is it is always very, very good. Um, it is amazing, and I cannot imagine the I and I posted them. Y'all have to go look at my TikTok. I posted some of the videos on my TikTok. I can't imagine the amount of money, and I was trying to remember, I think they posted it or somebody had said it last 4th of July how much money that was spent on all those fireworks. I cannot imagine.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

I can either.

SPEAKER_00 7:24

And they started work. Amber and I literally looked at the uh at the time last night, and they literally started right at nine o'clock last night. Um but yeah, it is uh it's it's such a good firework. There's they're just they're amazing, they're so pretty. Um but yeah, all the I can't imagine all the movies. I mean, and it's a f it's free. I mean, it's anybody can anybody can go watch it. You hit I mean you can we we always go to the lake and watch it because that's where they do it. But crap, you can see it from miles and miles away. You know, it's it's um it's it's really an amazing fireworks show. And uh, you know, to have to hold something like that for free that I can't so who is it the city of Sardis? Who is it that actually put or the fire department?

SPEAKER_01 8:16

I don't know if it's the um I don't know either. The I don't know if it's like the core or I don't know. I don't know, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:25

I I'm not sure either. I know I know it's a lot of moving parts, like different departments that the fire department and this. I mean, I know it's a lot of moving parts that help to get it together and to put you know to do it. Um but yeah, I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 8:38

And a lot of the boats and stuff stay on the lake to um or get on the lake, whatever, to watch it.

SPEAKER_00 8:45

Well, so I forgot to tell you this, and I told Chris, I was like, next year I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do this way ahead of time, and I'm going, I'm gonna be blow-up if I can talk and not start. I'm gonna be prepared, we're gonna do this. Well, so you know they, you know, you can um uh you can rent boats at the marina. And well, of course, I didn't think about it until the week before the fourth. And they only have I mean, they only have like when I looked, like five or six pontoons that you can rent. And I was like, I want us to do that, like, because we we both of it we both used to have boats. Amber and Brett used to have one, and um, and we used to have one that mama kept out at the marina, which she never used, so we always used it, and it was just easy, because you just you take your I mean the boat stays in the water. You take your stuff out to the marina, you put it in the boat, and you go. Um, but neither of us have a boat anymore, which they are they I mean they are it it does take a lot. It was a lot harder when the kids were younger. Um, but now that they're older, you know. But then you got everybody wanting to come with you, and nobody wants to but you know, just for R Square, it would be fine. But anyway, what I was getting to. Yeah, but it's it's it gets kind of crazy out there because we have been on there for the for the fireworks, but well, what I was getting to was I I I looked on there and I was like, I I'm going to rent us a boat. And so we have we have something to do, we're on the water, the kids, you know, and then we can stay out there and watch the fireworks. But I I I waited way too late for that because they were all you know, they were all taken up. So I told Chris was like, I didn't even realize they did that. I said, Well, I wasn't sure if they did. I just got on their website and looked, and you know, they did, and there really it wasn't that terrible for the whole day to rent one. Um, so I was like, Well, I'm gonna get on that next year early, earlier um and see, because it's just just so hot to sit out, you know, to sit out if you don't have you know something to do in the water, it's it's hot to sit outside all day. But um, but anyway, so I uh going into what kind of our topic is today, I um I've had this is I've had this one planned for for a while. Um and what brought it to my attention was I was having a conversation with someone and I said something to them and I said I said but but no but no and they told me they said but don't say but they said I don't I don't even I don't let my kids say but I don't let them say but I said what do you mean and they said but is but's but is but is negative they said but when you when you say something to somebody and then you say but it completely takes away the compliment that it erases and I thought you know I have never in my entire life thought about it that way and I and never had when he you know I thought when he said I don't let my kid say but I thought what is he talking or what are they talking about but um after he said that I realized something about myself I say but a lot like a lot you know and that one word can completely ruin a compliment it's like but equals the erase button you know it's it's like um it's almost like it tells the other person completely ignore what I just said because here's what I really mean it's like giving someone a gift and immediately taking it back you know think about it that way and or that little one three-letter word but cancels everything that just came before it you know people people are gonna hear the criticism that comes after it and not the compliment you know and some examples that I put down of of this you know if you think about it one of the very first things that came to mind and this is and this is how they explained it to me was well you did a great you did a great job but next time you need to do this better or well I love you but what you need to do is you know or or you look good in that outfit but and I thought man that that's that really is that's very true like you know especially especially if we're talking about you know the way that I thought about it in my mind and this person I know it it was the same way for them because they have kids from sports too the way I thought about it in my mind was when we're talking to our kids right after you know softball or baseball game you know well you know you did a really great job but next time you've got to really work on and it's like well mind you and tell me I did a good job you know like I mean you couldn't just tell me that I did a good job and just and you you know that's gotta be what they're thinking because if somebody were to tell us that that's exactly how we would take it. Yeah I mean you know and and for you know for a kid that's you know that's almost kind of like coming down on them uh what am I trying to say? Uh trying to be positive but still coming down on them. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it don't work that way.

SPEAKER_01 14:47

You know because it's like you're giving them some corrective criticism you know you're yeah trying to you're trying to give them compliment yeah constructive criticism but trying to give a compliment but then you're also pointing out something because all that they don't need to work on.

SPEAKER_00 15:00

Yeah because all they're gonna hear is the bad bad yeah the negative um yep but you know it's almost like what six is that second half every time. For sure. You know and and this could apply to you know not just parenting but relationships, friendship, marriage job. Yeah yeah even self-talk to ourself you know like okay well I mean and I mean I'm look I'm the world's worst and I mean I don't know that I'm ever gonna get past it you know okay well you did do good there but you didn't do so good there and I'm not s I'm not saying that's a bad I'm not saying it's always a bad thing necessarily because you know there are I think with your if like yeah self-talk that that's like diff I mean that's a point out where yeah where you've improved but something that you need to still improve where you're still right right right but definitely to other people it's yeah yeah for sure and um you know it's just one of those things that we do so often we we wouldn't realize it until somebody else pointed it out I wouldn't have for sure and um like I said you know a moment with your kids or that's where it hit me the hardest was well you did really good but I mean what about where you screwed up you know that play and and there's a different way that after talking with this person there's a I realize that there's a different way that you can say it and still get through to them. Yeah and and have that constructive um criticism with them and not have to okay I have to put y'all own to one of my favorite places and it's the honeybee coffee cupboard. I'm there literally every morning it's part of my routine at this point latte and egg bites in hand before I can function. The coffee is amazing the atmosphere is so welcoming and it's just one of those local spots that you end up loving real quick and listen if you haven't tried their cupcakes of the week yet what are you even doing with your life they switch flavors and they are dangerously good. They have several different breakfast options to choose from and I use the online ordering and order ahead every morning so my order is ready when I get there. So whether you're local or not stop by honeybee coffee cupboard grab your coffee try a cupcake and the breakfast and tell them I sent you but even like when this is this is a big thing for me when somebody says well I'm not trying to be mean but you know but they are trying to be mean. Right. You know what I mean? They're they're just they I don't even know why people say that because they really are trying to be mean.

SPEAKER_01 18:10

Yeah and I I don't know I guess well I don't maybe I say that other end of it I don't because I I I have said that I I with um with sports and children and that it's so much and so whatever I learned a long time ago to that they hear enough of that along with the coaches and you know other other people that um I try to you know now if it was just something something raggedy a big you know whole disaster then I'm not gonna say good job you know good job anyway. Exactly no we're not um but when they really did do good yeah I just try to point out especially if they're down or lost or whatever trying to point out you know the good whatever maybe whoever get it together next time you know that kind of that kind of thing. But um yeah it's a lot of that enough enough down on them and negative anyway. I don't don't start out the gate with absolutely oh you did great but you need to work on your field and or what was that error or blah blah blah you know I'm not doing that anyway.

SPEAKER_00 19:23

Yeah yeah we don't either yeah mm mm and you know there's just a lot of parents that don't think like us too I mean there's a lot of them that as soon as they get off that field they are tearing into them. So I don't wait till they get off the field so yeah we yeah you're right yeah but you know one thing that I um learned when and and this person said that what they do is instead of and I I keep like I I'm trying to um to use this myself but they said instead of but try and and it's the place of it. Like you did a great job and next time um we can tweak this one little thing that helps you and that that is much more positive and they don't hear that negative but and that made so much sense to me because it's like it's all it's all in the way you say things to people sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 20:30

And too like even if you swap but and say and next time I might not say that either I would I would just be like um your film was so much better today. I think if you just um were able to you know whatever work on such and such this week like I think it would you know make a big impact or be you know that increase over you know be even better right you know next week things like that because then they're just gonna be like oh well next time I need to do this to be you know to improve that kind of but then you know some of it anyway I yeah I get that but and then some anyway some of these children are just gonna well I I say this from looking as an outsider in with maybe boys and their dad or you and a teenage girl like you know unless it's you know whatever or any kind of like criticism you know there's gonna be some eye rolls and not necessarily criticism but you know just like about anything that you say that's not what we have learned whatever is after a game we don't say we just say hey you know w we just say hey Al you did a good job.

SPEAKER_00 21:45

We did a good job today girl. That's it.

SPEAKER_01 21:48

Yeah. We leave it at that. And no they've don't like if they just get off the field and like here it's a h you know feels like a hundred and fifteen degrees. Yeah. And they've been out there playing you know, three games or whatever, and then they've had their huddle at the end because I know our huddles should take forever. Yeah but um the huddle at the end like they don't want to talk about it anymore.

SPEAKER_00 22:09

Yeah they don't want to talk about it on the ride and I mean just be yeah and not just Atley like all the girls you know yeah we just say girls hey girls y'all did a great job out there good job and that's it I mean now practice that may be a different story you know the ride home which that's her and her daddy's deal but you know that may be a different story you know after practice on the way home there may be some discussion on what she did or didn't do and what she's got to improve on you know that that may be a different story right I mean it is and like really I mean yeah that's practice whatever and when you're something that they are trying to work on or need to work on or improve on yeah I mean you have to talk about it. Yeah you don't just say you know yeah good job if it you know if they didn't truly do yeah a good job you know like participation trophies it's different yeah situations uh yeah yeah but yeah I mean and then it's different you know when it's team sports and you're part of the team and you know not everything is on is on you exactly exactly off you know you can throw the whole team yes well and I kind of wrote that down next what you said about not even putting and in there just pause and separate it you know hey you did a great job next time you know you're fielding I I put that in there too like just pause and separate it don't you don't have to even put anything just don't say but you know don't because you think about an art head I mean I like I said I didn't think about it before but you just think about when we hear that but but you know you did great that's all you hear. Yeah but I mean what what what was up with that what was I mean you know what I mean like yeah that's all you don't hear anything before that.

SPEAKER_01 24:17

I know I I get um and I'm guilty. And when yeah when I had had to do evaluations of other people and their job that's a hard thing like you know you always you um nobody wants to hear the negative from you and it's not even if you're you know if it's something if they did awesome but you know hey you need to work on document and just work on this a little better you know or whatever they don't really hear so but too a lot of it depends on how you communicate that. That's what I'm saying. So that's one thing that I always try to tell would tell people when or even if I was coming in and doing audits like I'm not being the bad guy and my people would say they didn't like red marks like you know like feel like you're in school and getting yeah you're grading your paper and you're checking behind. I'm like they wanted there to be a 100 and so I'm like you're doing you know really good. But there's different things that I have would have to grade on and then like on employee evals like you can score up to a five five being the best but then I had um a boss and a mentor one time that was like I'm rarely unless it's just something an area that I really truly can give somebody a five on the about the highest you're gonna get is a four because there's always room for improvement. Always so always that's right that's exactly right. And that's what I try to would have to relay to those employees like if you're always a five in every one of these areas then you know but if like I said if somebody truly is as far as like their um being on time not calling in you know all those kind of things being punctual yeah always you know getting your patient load scene this and that if I can truly give you like if you've done great awesome whatever give you a five in that area but say it's documentation communication you know whatever those things you can always improve on that yeah so um but and it and if if I you know have to remind people like I'm not an outsider or wouldn't I not an outsider not a bad guy I'm truly trying to help you prepare and prepare you if you know um when you have auditors come in um things like that so that you're ready. Yeah yeah but yeah that's right anyway so and it's it's it's truly educational and getting people to see that you know that I'm just trying to get you ready and you know want you to be on your Ps and Q's and you know crossing those T's and dying those I's to where you know that it's not leaving all the stuff like and then you but then oh Lord you have some people that it's just oh I yeah you know I I know because trying to grow trying to get something across to them and get them to even care.

SPEAKER_00 27:18

Yeah is exactly a lot about doing the job and doing it well. Doing a job and doing it well and having that work ethic that's that's different.

SPEAKER_01 27:29

I mean that's it's it's very different and um I know I I get so tired of hearing this um to it's different it it is very different from the way even just the way that we were raised what we were taught how we hold ourselves accountable the worth work ethic we have compared to people now um I don't know it's just like some do not get it and I'm like do you not understand especially which I know you know employers need to be very honest with themselves and very um I'll say some need a reality check. But when those people are on like a 30 I mean a 90 day probational period yes use it like yeah if they're not performing if they're not doing what they need to be doing if they're goofing up if they're messing up that bad like take heed to that probation period and use it to where you're not stuck and then if you do something you're having to pay somebody you know unemployment until they find something you know if they're not performing well like be smart if they're well especially like my deal is if it's within that 90 day period and they're not on time.

SPEAKER_00 28:56

Mm-hmm they're missing work in that first 90 days how do you think they're fixing to do for the rest of the time get rid of them. That is that that is a probationary period for a reason. Yeah and if they're failing at their job task and costing you time and costing you money and affecting your workplace and your flow like yeah yeah well you know and I mean I'm sure most places do I don't know but like when we hire somebody you know we have a process they get so they get we we get we have an employee handbook they get a copy of it they have to sign there there's two copies I sign it they sign it that they have acknowledged and read which we don't care if they you know I'm not saying we don't care but if they don't read it that's on them. They sign that they have acknowledged and read the rules and regulations in the handbook.

SPEAKER_01 29:58

And not only the rules and regulations but your expectations like your job description and what yes your performance expectations yes and well and what that I mean by them signing that they're saying that they that means that within that 90 day period we we you know we hold the authority to get rid of them for any reason if they're not following if if if if they fa if they miss work and they fail to call in one time they're gone.

SPEAKER_00 30:27

If they're late one time we I mean we have we have that right to terminate their employment within that probationary period for for any of those reasons.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

Yep I mean and people I mean I know things are different and things but like even with with things being as different as they are but I mean as things being if you're a whole adult and or starting a family or you know young adult whatever trying to get out on your own this and that and you're getting paid to do a job why would you not try to fulfill your you know duties and support your family what's your ex what's expected of you so that you can bring home that check and support your family and have a stability of you know a full-time job.

SPEAKER_00 31:13

And you know not even that like even if you don't have a family but so say even if you're just trying to get out of yes but you know with your parents I know which I know people have to be a lot of people have a different work ethic. Then but you know Amber even people that are are at our age that were raised in the same generation we were don't have my me mine and yours are same work ethic. Yeah and sometimes like I don't know if it's because we were raised by such like strong willed women that have always been hard workers. You know because yeah yeah yeah I think that how yeah I think that has a lot to do with it but then too you know I mean you look at our but but then if but then you do look as our gener at our generation as a whole most of us are much more hard workers than these that these that are coming up now. Yeah look it it's got it's got to do with their raising there and and I know that we people get tired of hearing it but they're they're soft I mean you just think about like when we were coming up in high school the guys I mean like Justin Pettit the ones that worked for mom and it's it is it's hard work in the summer especially lift taking all those law pedians up to ones that don't have elevators they did it no problem. The ones that she has tried to hire over the years since then honey they honey they quit the first day I mean you I mean I'm I you know I'm not I'm wouldn't I'm not calling out names for sure but I can definitely tell you some that they were like Miss Anita this is too hard I I I can't um I can't do this. You know and back then all those all those boys were worried about was doing their job and doing it well for gas money and beer money. You know that was all they wanted at the end of the day dusty. I mean all the you know and now it's too easy because they don't have to do it because they're riding around in brand new trucks and I mean they're giving everything. And I you know hey that's great that's great that you know people can do that. I'm not knocking that you know that's not what I'm saying at all. But when you give them everything and you don't make them work or for anything or take responsibility.

SPEAKER_01 33:43

You raise them to think that they're entitled that yeah they make unemployable adults then then not only them but you sadly are going to be in for a rude awakening absolutely years.

SPEAKER_00 33:58

You know my therapist one of the first sessions I had with him he told me um about this kid that uh that he recommended that he knew had known for years you know knew their family good family um he went to Ole Miss graduated top of his class accountant and he recommended me for a job he didn't get it and uh the guy over the firm called him and he was like what happened and he said I gave him one instruction I wanted to see if he could follow instructions and if he could listen to authority so he took him in the interview room and he said I want you to sit here until I come back and sharpen all these pencils that's he did I think I told you that he said sharpen these pencils he said yeah sit in here in this conference room till I get back and sharpen all these pencils well he got tired of sitting there and sharpening the pencils because he you know he was entitled he didn't understand you know he thought it was stupid so he gets up and he walks out and he's asking you know everybody at the desk he's like I mean I'm done sharpening all these pencils I mean this is this is stupid I'm here for an interview where's the guy he wouldn't give him the job and he and he called other firms and told them he's and and he came back in and they told him why he said I'm not giving you this job he said because you are entitled I can already tell he said you could not follow my two basic instructions you could not do what I ask you to do and you could not listen to authority that's all I asked you to do that's all I wanted from you was to do those two things I ask and you couldn't do it. No he didn't know let me take that back he did not finish sharpening all of the pencils because after about halfway through the box he said this is stupid I'm not doing this yeah he didn't hire him and he he ended up work do he ended up doing something completely different because nobody would hire him.

SPEAKER_01 36:02

Seems like some somebody else I can't remember who it was recently were doing something completely different than what they had um gone to school for or whatever it was. But um I'm just hoping I especially which I always have but lately more so the older your kids get and the more they want to go and do um have tried to I point out different things um whether it may be gunner's in the car with me when I open the electricity bill yeah um and I'll tell him how much it is um and he knows things like how how um how much an hour uh like minimum wage is or most jobs like start out at or say what other people are at now you know um and then like things that come out taxes how much insurance cost um house payments how much it costs to fill up the car grocery you know things like that how much things cost yeah just so to live he's aware aware of hey this is what you know somebody makes this is what you actually bring home this is how much it costs to basically live and then this is how much your fun and go you know things like that yeah um cost which by next summer I'm sure he'll be um at least Gunnar does too but um it's just a lot of stuff right now it is oh well with that both getting a ride and then well that and then their sports and well him like he's so stinking a lot of the you know boys like the outside this and that which he did do has done some um cutting limbs and cleaning up fence lines and stuff like that week before last but um the poison oak he's he's really allergic to poison oak and so he got in some when he was fooling with some of that thought he got it in his eye yeah so that's my kind of like drawback with sending him somewhere off yeah not necessarily just how hot it is but yeah you go off somewhere else with somebody and then you get all up and that's gonna be a whole nightmare yeah well you have to you have to you have to start them early and you have to give them responsibilities.

SPEAKER_00 38:30

I mean like Atlie I have not done a dish in my house or any of her laundry in probably two years I mean she takes her own clothes puts her own clothes in the washing machine puts them in the dryer gets them out I don't I don't do any of her laundry she does all that she folds them puts them up I don't do any of her laundry at all the dishes that's her responsibility she unloads a dishwasher puts them in the dishwasher puts them up I have not done that well I'll take that back I mean I I have done it if they're in the sink I'll wash them I have not I have not touched the dishwasher in probably two years I don't do them that's Atlee's responsibility her clothes I don't do them she does them and she sweeps and she mops the house which you know I do that a lot in between um but no I mean you have to give them responsibilities and they have to know hey you know these are your things that you have to do and you know that and as far as the money goes too you know yeah that's that's great and we we kind of start with our kids both early with hey we go out to eat look at this bill you know this is how much it costs and then hey we go out hey guess what we just spent this tonight to go out to eat kids look how much this is you know showing them oh yeah that kind of when I did just like we'll just do a no it's around the weekend but if I just did a grocery order yeah and or even going fast food yeah was to go do something I'm like uh we have food at home uh and this is what we're eating you know whatever yeah that's what yeah because and you know like the other night Atley was like can I get Chick-fil-A I'm like you got Tostinos pizza in that freezer go ahead and put it in the oven because she knows how to do that she's known how to do that too I'm like sorry I mean you just got Chick-fil-A two nights ago well I'll pay for it well who do you who do you think is money's on that Venmo car well I know I know it's yours so go get the tostinos I mean you know but the thing is a lot of parents don't think like us and I hope I'm hoping with our generation and our kids I'm hoping that more I'm hoping that more parents raise our kids different than this last whatever you call them I you know what I'm saying I'm hoping because I know that there is I know there is a small circle of us that are trying to do right by their kids. You know what I mean? Taking things away from them when they don't do their chores and you know so I'm hoping that I'm hoping there's more uh out there like us than not but yeah um because I I I know I do know of several that you know are kids age that they I mean they do they have to they have to do their own laundry and if if they haven't done their had their done their laundry or if they haven't helped clean the house they don't get to go. You know and I'm not saying you know we don't we don't take it that far. I mean it we're not gonna keep Atley from going and doing if she has not done her fold and put up her laundry. We're not gonna keep you know I mean go and do whatever with your friends do your laundry when you get back. As long as it's done and put up you know but um but yeah but you know I mean going back to what I was saying even I think it's hard. I just thought I just thought mama fell downstairs or something but um and you know where I'm going with this but even some people our age don't have our work ethic not that it's anything like you know the 20 year olds now but yeah yeah I mean we just had a very strong work ethic and we're gonna do our job to the best of our ability and we get very frustrated when we are see others who do the least amount to get by.

SPEAKER_01 42:48

Mm-hmm. Yeah yeah and we're both in roles that um other people aren't really like cross-trained at or whatever. So that it just makes it if we don't just wouldn't perform then it's only gonna burn us. Yeah yeah I mean nobody yeah yeah nobody knows we take to take off with like I know with you taking Atlie. Well no maybe it won't be as bad since the plant shut down this week I was about to say with it being a holiday and then you being off the day before yeah but you know to catch up from the end of the week.

SPEAKER_00 43:26

Even when like my stuff still kind of goes on even with because there's still so much to be you know like checks you have to still come in yeah bills still have to be paid so even when the plant is closed down there's not that aspect of you know employees needing me and needing things which helps but you know there's still payments to be processed and you know deposits to be made and there's still ACH's to have to be you know all about um but um and of course you know, tomorrow, which thank goodness that you know there won't be people bugging the crap out of me, but I'll have to catch up from whatever Thursday.

SPEAKER_01 44:09

Yeah. Thursday.

SPEAKER_00 44:11

But yeah, you know, we um we have very specific both of us roles. Um that if we don't do it and we're not there. So it just piles up till we get back.

SPEAKER_01 44:21

Just because I mean actually with the legal holiday falling on Saturday, you know, places like where I work you get the Friday before or if it falls on Sunday, you know, you get Monday after whatever. But being off I guess and not being gone anywhere. Um being off Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and then both both places where I have um Vender booths app were closed um Saturday, Sunday and it'll be closed tomorrow. They're both normally closed on Monday. Okay. So I've been working on things like at home as far as um getting things to go in in those but like I couldn't go take it or go to either one of the places to because when I do take stuff like I look at other people's booths and stuff. But like today when I got done I worked on I think it was like eight pieces like framed pieces um framing some canvases and then working on some different things that are framed to go in my booths and um so Brad had come in there to see what I was doing and he was like so you finished are you going ahead and taking those today and then I have um a couple bigger pieces that I need her to help me load and go with me to take and um he was like are you taking those today and I was like no they're closed. So like I haven't so I sat down at my desk yesterday and logged in and did a couple charts and then I was like Amber what are you doing? Like it's a holiday. Yeah um you have things to do with the house so you know yeah whatever but um it's just oh like the Monday scaries or whatever. Like I know it's alarming. Oh yeah. And then the whole week because like I said I know um which ours has been crazy with it's gonna it seems like it hadn't really slowed down which it it is worse in December and June well January and July um with people changing insurances but it seems like we've had an awfully lot just every month it seems like y'all it seems like y'all have not slowed down every month six months.

SPEAKER_00 46:27

Yeah it seems like y'all have not had like I I haven't been caught up yeah since I don't know I don't either I was gonna say I could have been a little more caught up maybe um end of November beginning of December before all the new year changes hit but I really can't remember but I know it has not been since January Yeah no uh uh that's what I was saying I was gonna I saw and well I mean the last six months that's yeah that's why that's what I was saying it seems like you have not been yeah since then it's crazy um but before before I get really off subject with what I was about to um to to ask I was gonna say this kind of to to tie this all in with the whole but situation canceling it all out um I was gonna just say to the audience y'all y'all pay attention this week like really pay attention to how many times you use and say but and I'm doing it too like I mean I have I had to start catching myself you know saying it so I know that I'm not the only one but just pay attention this week to how many times you say it but anyway um so I'm I am going totally off subject here but I had to I had to talk about this for a minute and ask because I don't think we've talked about this and if you hadn't seen it then you'll just have you'll have to watch it and we'll talk about it on a later one. But okay so first of all let me go back to this all right did you watch the um because I know it's been viral so did you watch the girl oh what was it called the on Netflix that the crash into the wall did you watch that one? The crash no oh crap man okay that's what it's called uh I think so the cra the one the the the well the one that had her boyfriend in the car the crazy one she went crazy and she literally sped into a wall at 100 miles an hour and killed him you didn't watch that one I don't think so okay so did you watch the maternal instinct yet no what aren't okay well you'll have to watch those two so we can talk about him you gotta watch but I watched Dutton Ranch did you watch no me and Chris McCoy that was a season finale me yeah that's what Chris said we were supposed to watch it this morning and um he had to take Aaliyah home and then he they went to church and now they went golf and so no we're gonna watch it tonight.

SPEAKER_01 48:59

Okay well crap you gotta watch all right if you can't watch but all right so you can't watch maternal instinct first these are both true stories and they are viral you gotta watch it's not a documentary is it yeah yeah but no but no but they're not they're they're just both like one show each they're not long okay yeah they're not long they're both like 45 minutes each okay yeah they're not uh uh they're not like see your like shows and shows okay but no they're I mean they they're both true stories they like really happen well I probably haven't seen it because you know kind of like on my FYP you know my Netflix knows what I like to and I don't watch document documentaries so well no everybody like everybody has talked and heard about this one and I didn't know the first one I did not know about and Aliyah and Atlee made me and Chris sit down and watch it yes like the cra the crash one the girl that killed her boyfriend they made me sit down and watch this one okay I wouldn't have known about it until they told me and then the only reason I had watched the other one didn't he I didn't know about the other one and Chris was like Brittany we have got to watch it he that's the only reason why I watched either one of them he was like you think that this girl was crazy on the crash one I said no Chris there ain't no crazy you're can't get any crazy he said yeah I'm telling you he said I've been seeing this all over TikTok you know Chris the people the quiet ones are the ones that be all over the internet like Chris he was like I'm telling you this girl on this show is way crazier and she was have you seen this is off subject too which I mean it just goes into the crazy but um in Ohio all those kids that they went into the that house and got I don't know how I I don't remember how the police or whatever like who who reported it or what caused them to go. I think somebody was like um anyway they rescued 16 children from this home um from what I gather all one mama. So she's basically been I think one of the later articles I read she's basically been pregnant since she was 13 with very few like maybe the ne the first you know the first one being like 10 10 months old and then she was expecting again or some of them were like a little but you know it was just crazy and it was so it was like her I think it was her her brother her mom her dad were the four adults that were arrested um two of the kids had to be taken straight to like the hospital for medical care the oldest was because they were talking about like how they've kept them um out of the doctor's office how they've kept them out of school um it sounds like basically anything since they were born but like I think the oldest one because somebody was saying can I write their name 15 or 20 other 16 children. Oh yeah so the oldest one could not I think they said the oldest one was 18 but was still counted as one of the children because they were not they I think they could have even been nonverbal like oh my god you know not didn't have the mental capacity of an 18 year old oh yeah was like you know so it was still because they'd never been in school huh it was still um considered a child because of you know the um mental state so were they all incest? Uh it didn't sound like it but it sounded like the the actual mother of those that something was going on for her to be she at 13 years old. Yeah so yeah it did not say that but I'm guessing that that was the four the four adults in the home when they went in oh you know there'd be a documentary on that the 16 kids out but it was like the living conditions that they were in I mean it was this tiny like little shotgun house almost looked like oh my god little you know wood house or whatever but you could just see through some of the windows just like cardboard boxes and things just stacked up way past the window. I've got to read about this.

SPEAKER_00 53:32

Yeah it was it's been her her face has been for sure all over so who so all so all of the so the uh the grandparents you say the grandparents were arrested the was the mother arrested? Okay. And her brother so yeah somebody had to been doing something bad to somebody for all that to be gone. And obviously they were hiding from everybody to have had that it was crazy. They had to have been because if the kids weren't enrolled obviously they weren't enrolled in school nope oh yeah that's nuts I gotta and then two of them are in such bad shape.

SPEAKER_01 54:04

But then like okay so there were still sixteen of them but then um I can't remember if this was a news outlet or whatever because you see so many people like take articles and put you know you don't know if it's still all the facts. Right. But um there was I think th uh maybe two or three sets there were two two or three sets of twins. Oh my gosh. There had been a couple steelborns. Mm yeah and so I mean it was over you know it was it was a lot of yeah I've got to go look up yeah I gotta go read about that that is horrible.

SPEAKER_00 54:45

Yeah yeah it was in Ohio mm-hmm oh yeah I gotta go read about this I gotta go I'm just gonna I'm just gonna pull up google google it right now so I can I won't forget about it. Let's see 16 rescue from Ohio home looked almost feral authorities say children weren't enrolled weren't enrolled in school the family moved around over the past two decades. Yeah that's so far oh Jesus we'll have to post this picture I'm sure y'all probably all know oh my who we're talking about that is awful that was her before before she was cute and decent looking yeah oh my God y'all I'm sorry that pic that just shocked me to death oh my god and this was a little house how do you even fit that many people in a little bitty house like that oh my god their children remained mostly confined to a small room in the house investigators said under under deplorable conditions right under our noses nobody was able to help them sooner they've been calling it the house of horrors case oh okay house of horrors case oh yeah definitely got a look up about this house of horrors case that is horrible I don't understand what is wrong with people there's so many there and there's so much of that yeah the ones that they took out were 18 months to 18 years as the ages of the oh my god that is horrible that's terrible y'all there are some there are some sick people in in this world and there's no telling how much of that goes on that never you know what I mean that never gets I when you so when you I was imagining in my head when you first were telling me about this all I'm thinking I don't want to offend anybody but what are they called? Um is it polygamy?

SPEAKER_01 56:46

Oh hold on that oh I could have been completely wrong because I was looking at the thing okay so this somebody else's that was saying that oh yeah I know Straw Mount so I'm guessing that that was her h not her brother that was her husband and his parents and that's what somebody was saying like she was married off into this family at whatever age so that is the mom the dad and the grandparents oh at 13 that's younger than Atlie and Gunnar can you imagine that is younger than our kids is yeah first child at 13 married at 15 I still think that had to be some forcible something going on there because you don't know what I mean at that age yeah that that that had to have been something forcible going on something there.

SPEAKER_00 57:45

And she looks she's only one of these 33 oh god she almost looks like she's been kept on drugs or something by her face and how she used to look some of them which you know I mean that's I mean I'm not saying it that's what drug traffickers do to these women they get them all dope messed up on drugs and stuff.

SPEAKER_01 58:08

Did you see the little um um is it Jackson Tennessee? Did you see that?

SPEAKER_00 58:15

What happened there?

SPEAKER_01 58:15

I'm gonna get you to read the so I didn't get into the full story I just saw like where like the news was live when the guy it was a guy who had kidnapped a little girl um Jackson Tennessee and I don't know how they called him or who reported whatever but anyway it was on the interstate so it caused the interstate to be shut down. And I know Collins was one of them that was stuck in the traffic because they were headed up. Yeah well then somebody else I know had reported like she was going over um the bridge when it was going down like over the interstate and so like she videoed the whole thing where like the like um the guy I think they had already gotten the little girl but the guy gets out of the car and he's like walking backwards down the side of the interstate and all these police officers are moving you know toward him behind a vehicle and there's all these you know police cars and police presence there and the guy the whole time has gun a gun in his hand like it's pointed down so then when she was video and he wasn't pointing it at them but he's still walking backwards but he doesn't drop it doesn't stop you know whatever but anyway they rescued the little girl um and then um I think that he was shot and killed. Oh well good they deserve to be the interstate um was shut down for a while up there but that was wild well and yeah he said that he th uh Colin said he on his video he thought that that's what was going on.

SPEAKER_00 59:44

Yeah and it was on the news outlets and like I said I saw the girl who was there. Good thing that they had her stuff that is wild it's such a terrible world that we're living in I gotta stretch my legs out.

SPEAKER_01 59:59

Um this do you want to read that of course funny okay am I a little unhinged my friend was on the worst date ever so she texted me our code word instead of just calling with a fake emergency I showed up at the restaurant pretending I'd locked my keys in my car and desperately needed her help the guy looked so confused but it worked so are we a little unhinged or was this just a great um plan for me and my BFF that worked I think that's hilarious.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:32

I think what do you think?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:34

Um yeah I guess if she yeah you would have to text the code word because if you called anyway I probably wouldn't answer the phone if it was um after business hours because y'all know normally my phone's on so I don't hear the notifications. I think that was a good plan.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:49

Yeah I think that was a great plan that worked that that worked out yeah yeah I mean if you if if you're on a bad date or in a bad situation that you need to get out of and that was a good one pretend that her kids were locked in her car. Yeah that was a good rescue yeah well I hope that y'all enjoyed this episode and hanging out with us and um if y'all have anything that y'all want to add or if y'all have an unhinged uh story that y'all want to write in y'all send it to oh what?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:20

No no no I was gonna say oh oh oh and um we forgot y'all y'all know the usual Brittany says over there write in and like and follow and all that so whatever so y'all know we pre-record um every other Sunday but the episode doesn't go live until usually Tuesday or Wednesday so whatever day the episode goes live by then I will have my ducks in a row and we um we'll I'll write down all the names and we'll do we're gonna do a night a put in a uh whatever drawing like we're gonna for real draw a live yes I um and we'll video that yes we will do the drawing out to whoever um submitted a picture of they and their bestie um and we will draw for that whatever day we release the podcast.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:09

Yes we will um we will do a live forget y'all yes well yes we will do a live drawing yeah with the holiday and things being closed and then I have literally did not go um shopping at all um this week except for my normal well not normal but I did get to go uh thrifting one evening this week and then um I got irritated one day so I took my lunch break to um one of the stores in town but anyway I haven't gone officially shopping yeah it's just been crazy with the holiday and all that this week but um we don't forget y'all I have all of the um I've I have all the pictures and everything too so um we are gonna do that live drawing um and we will we'll we'll we'll record of course we'll um you know we'll record and we'll post and all that good stuff so y'all um watch for that and y'all can come hang out with us between episodes um at the private Facebook page y'all can contact us y'all know how to contact us um tick tock a little unhinged26 um y'all can write in uh directly to the email a little unhinged26 at gmail.com y'all can send us fan mail right there through um the Apple Podcast app um lots of ways to contact us you know all that shit that we say that I say and I hope that y'all have a great week and we love and appreciate y'all. Love y'all bye peaceful