06. 2026 Breakup Guide: How to Heal from Heartbreak

Heartbreak has a way of stopping you in your tracks — especially at the start of a new year. In this first episode of 2026, I’m talking honestly about breakups, healing, and what it actually looks like to move forward when your heart hasn’t caught up to your head yet.

This episode is for anyone walking through a breakup, divorce, or the ending of a relationship that once felt like forever. We talk about why healing isn’t linear, why understanding why something ended doesn’t immediately remove the attachment, and how to stop reopening the wound so real healing can begin.

In this episode, I cover:

• Why heartbreak lingers even when you know the relationship is over
• The importance of creating space (and what “no contact” is really for)
• Remembering the full picture — the roses and the thorns
• Guilt, second-guessing, and the pull of familiar pain
• How to redirect your love in healthy ways
• Reconnecting with creativity, friendships, routines, and faith
• How heartbreak shapes who you become next

I also share how this season has deepened my faith, what I’m learning about self-trust, and why asking for support is sometimes the strongest next step.

If you’re in the middle of heartbreak, coming out of it, or walking alongside someone who is — this episode is an invitation to move through it with clarity, discipline, and compassion instead of rushing or judging yourself.

✨ Healing doesn’t mean forgetting.
✨ It means moving forward — stronger, clearer, and more grounded.

Thanks for being here, and thanks for listening.

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Transcript

0:00

You don't need a perfect moment to start living a healthier, happier life. Welcome to Hannah's Healthy Habits, a podcast about learning, growing, and building a healthier life from the inside out. And now we're doing it together. Hi guys. Welcome back to the podcast. Happy New Year, and welcome to the first episode of 2026. I am so glad that you're here today. Thank you for listening, and if this is your first time here, welcome. I am so grateful for each and every one of you who tunes in for the support, the feedback, and for the community that's grown around this little passion of mine. I wanted this first episode of the year to be about breakups, and anyone who knows me knows that I have been walking through a really hard breakup, and I also know that I'm not alone in that. There are so many people right now going through heartbreak, breakups, divorce, the ending of relationships that once felt like they're forever. There's something about this time of year after the holidays with the fresh mindset of January that people start taking a harder look at their lives. They ask themselves if everything is aligned, if the person they're with is the person they want to build a future with, and sometimes that leads to staying and going deeper, and other times it leads to walking away. This episode has been on my heart for a while, but heartbreak isn't always something you know how to talk about, especially when you're still in the middle of it. Sometimes you have clarity, sometimes you have questions, and most of the time you're somewhere in between still living your life, growing, but not untouched by what has happened. And that's really what I wanted to talk about today. Healing isn't linear. It's not something you complete and then move on from like a checklist. It's something you grow through as you're living it through the ups and the downs. Real life has a lot of layers, and most of us will experience heartbreak at some point. For me, heartbreak has become a blessing in disguise. It has deepened my faith and brought me closer to God and ways I didn't expect. I started reading my Bible from the beginning last year, and right now I'm in Deuteronomy, and a few days ago I was praying and telling God that I was really struggling, that I just needed someone to talk to. I called a friend and she didn't answer, so I decided to read instead. And one of the notes talked about how God led the Exodus generation into the wilderness for 40 more years because they didn't trust him yet. And how that season wasn't punishment but preparation. It was about building trust and strengthening that relationship. That moment really shifted something for me. I knew then that this heartbreak wasn't for nothing. I knew it was going to be hard, painful, and test my patience and strength, but knowing that God has been with me the entire time gives me peace. Even on the days when I don't feel peace at all and the long run, I trust that it's all working out for my good and that it will be better than I could ever imagine. Heartbreak has a way of stopping you in your tracks, whether you're the one who initiates the breakup or the one being broken up with, it changes everything. Your routines, your sense of stability, the way you think about your future, especially if that future was something you planned together and suddenly you're left asking questions you don't have the answers to yet. A lot of advice around breakups makes it seem like you're supposed to be decisive and detached. Like once you understand why something ended, the rest should be easy. But that has not been my experience, and I don't think it is for most people either. What I've learned is that you can understand something in your mind and still feel the pull of it in your heart. You can know what's right. And still feel attached. And that doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong. It means that you're human, that you care deeply for the other person and that it meant something. So this episode isn't coming from a place of having everything figured out. I wanted to start the year here because Heartbreak really has a way of shaping who you become next. Whether you're in the middle of it, coming out of it, about to go into it, or walking along someone who is, there's way to move through it without judging yourself the entire time, not rushing through it. Not pretending it's linear, but understanding it and moving through it well. And once you're in that place where you know something has ended, but you still feel the pull of it, the real question becomes what is actually helping and what is keeping you stuck? For me and for most people I've watched go through this, the hardest and most important piece is creating space. I wanna be clear about this. Creating space isn't about punishment or control or proving anything or about trying to get that person to want you back. It is for your relief. It's about giving your heart and your mind enough distance so they're not constantly being reactivated. Once you're in that place where you know the relationship has ended, but you still feel the pull of it, this is usually where things start to get confusing and really hard because a part of you understands what happens, and another part of you still wants that closeness, that reassurance and. Familiarity, and this is where creating space really becomes crucial. So the first rule is no contact. People talk about no contact, like it's this crazy rule, like you either do it perfectly or you fail. And I don't think framing it like that helps anyone because the point of creating the space isn't about control. It's not about punishing yourself or that other person. It's not about proving your strength or. Showing the other person anything. It's about creating relief in your own heart. Heartbreak is an open wound, and every time you check their social media, read old messages, look at pictures, reach out just to see how they're doing, or replay conversations in your head. You're touching the wound again and you're not letting it close. Creating space gives your nervous system a chance to calm down. It lets your emotions stop being constantly reactivated, and that's the only way clarity actually has room to come in. A lot of people resist space because they're afraid of it. It means letting go forever, but space doesn't mean erasing someone, it's just giving yourself enough distance to feel like yourself again,. Space isn't just physical, it's mental and emotional. It's choosing not to rehash the relationship And keeping yourself tied to a version of the past that no longer exists. This doesn't mean you won't miss them or mean that you won't think about them. It means you're not feeding the attachment every time the feeling shows up. The goal here isn't to stop loving someone overnight. The goal is to stop reopening the wound so your heart can actually heal because without space. Everything feels urgent. But with that space, things start to feel more clear. Once you create space, something very interesting will usually start to happen. Your mind starts filling in the gaps, and more often than not, it starts highlighting the good parts. You remember the connection, the laughter, the moments where it felt easy and safe, familiar. Slowly, the bad parts, the hard parts begin to fade away. I heard on a podcast once, it referred to as Remembering the Roses and forgetting the thorns. This is one of the biggest reasons people feel pulled back after a breakup. Not because the relationship was right, but.'cause our brains are wired to clinging to what's familiar, especially when it's uncomfortable or when we're feeling lonely. The nostalgia hits This is where a lot of people start doubting their decision. They think maybe it wasn't that bad, or maybe I overreacted, or if I had just tried a little bit harder, and this is why it's so important to remember the full picture. Not to villainize the other person and not to rewrite the relationship is terrible, but to honor the version of yourself who knew something wasn't working, one of the most helpful things you can do in this phase is to write down the reasons the relationship ended, patterns, the misalignment. The moments where you felt unseen, unsettled, even if you couldn't explain why. Missing someone doesn't mean the relationship was right. It means there was a bond there. And bonds don't disappear just because something ends. And clarity comes from remembering both the roses and the thorns. And allowing yourself to hold the truth without softening it to make the pain easier. When you get to the point where you stop romanticizing the past. Guilt will usually start to creep in. You'll start questioning yourself, wondering if you gave up too soon, or if you should have tried harder, or if the pain you're feeling right now means that you made the wrong choice, and this is where a lot of people get stuck. Pain is not proof that you chose wrong. Grief is natural. It's a response to loss even when it's a necessary decision, something you wanted. A lot of second guessing comes from guilt, especially if you were the one who initiated the ending. But guilt doesn't always mean you did something wrong. It just means that you cared. You're human and it's a very normal response, but staying tied to a familiar pain keeps you anchored into a chapter that you're trying to close. The more you direct your love outward, the less power the past has on you. Not because it didn't matter, but because it's no longer holding all of your emotional energy. One of the biggest misunderstandings about heartbreak is the idea that healing means loving less. That you're supposed to shut something down in your brain and become detached. But that's not how it works. It's kind of like quitting nicotine or hardcore drugs. Love it produces so much dopamine within us and. That love doesn't just disappear because your relationship's ending, it stays, and if it has nowhere to go, it becomes pain and turns into other bad habits. So instead of asking yourself, how do I stop loving them? A better question is, where does this love go? How can I redirect it into something good for a while? Your attention, care, and emotional energy were pointed into one person, but when that stops, it leaves so much open space and that space needs something. One of the simplest ways you can start redirecting your love is by doing things that reconnect you to yourself, especially things you loved before the relationship, or even as a kid. Thinking about what you did that made you feel alive or just something fun, maybe you loved getting creative and drawing, writing, dancing, playing music, being outside, cooking, building things, or even just getting lost in a hobby. Those parts of you didn't disappear. They just got forgotten. Creativity is powerful after heartbreak and something that I really have been trying to focus on this year because it gives your emotions somewhere to go and you don't have to be good at it. You just have to enjoy it. Another place your love can go is inter relationships that help you grow, that make you feel better. Strengthening friendships that already exist or reaching out to new people that. You want to become closer with just allowing space for new connections. Breakups can shrink your world if you let them, but redirecting your love is how you expanded and feel like yourself. Again. This might look like saying yes to plans that you normally wouldn't, spending more intentional time with your friends or your family going to a workout class or the gym. Joining a group or a community where you're around people regularly, and not to distract yourself, but to remind yourself that connection still is there. Love can also be redirected into your body and into your routines, moving your body in a way that feels supportive. Cooking for yourself, creating structure, even when things feel unsteady. These habits might be small, but they really help to stabilize your safety and your body and give you that control of your life back. And for some people, redirecting love means deepening their spiritual life and prayer, reflection and time alone with God. Not asking for more answers, but just building trust within him and creating a stronger bond. None of this is about forcing healing. It's about letting your love circulate instead of staying stuck in one place. Because when love moves, it strengthens you, and when you feel strengthened, the past starts to lose its grip on you. At some point, and this looks different for everyone, the focus will begin to shift. You won't be thinking about the breakup all the time anymore, you won't be replaying everything constantly, and you'll start to notice yourself again. And that's when you realize that this isn't about what ended, but about who you really are and what you're becoming. Breakups have a way of forcing honesty among us, and they show yourself where you've been stretched too thin. Ignoring gut feelings where you were trying to make something work because it felt familiar, but not because it was what's meant for you. One thing I've learned through this process is that growth doesn't have to be done alone. At a certain point I realized I didn't need to figure it out all in my own head. I need real help. That sounds so dramatic. But. I just wanted to, I want to, this is something I'm actively working on, but talking with a counselor and helping me really understand the mindset and the patterns that I go through, and getting answers that I am either afraid to answer on my own or I just don't give myself the space to. Really sit with, and I think that's going to start making a big difference. One thing this season has really taught me is that growth doesn't always mean pushing through by yourself. Sometimes it means recognizing that you need help and that you need support to get to the next step. For me, this is honestly the furthest that I've gotten in the cycle of breaking up. I feel like in the past I, I didn't cope with my breakups in the right way. I turned to alcohol or smoking weed or nicotine, or just numbing and disassociating. But this time I wanted to be intentional with the way that I'm healing and. Really feel through my feelings and become better through all of that. And for me, the next step is talking to a counselor. That's something I've wanted to do and I just wanna get clear on my patterns and understand at a deeper level and. Be able to talk openly with somebody about it. I think there's a lot of strength in knowing that and to know that on the other side, knowing that you put a lot of internal work in, I am ready to have that outside perspective and have clarity on my life and the things that I'm willing to accept and to be disciplined, to support myself, to help with routines, and showing up for me, following through on the small promises and rebuilding trust within myself. One of the biggest things I've learned throughout this heartbreak and heartbreaks in the past is that healing isn't linear. There's no timeline for how fast you're supposed to heal, and there's no version where you do it perfectly. Moving forward doesn't mean forgetting. It doesn't mean minimizing what you felt or pretending it didn't matter. It means allowing your life to keep going. And to keep expanding even while you're still carrying pieces of what you've been through. If you're listening to this in the middle of heartbreak, first of all, I am so, so sorry. I want you to know that you're not alone and you're not behind. If you're listening from a more stable place. I hope this reminds you how much growth can come from slowing down and taking care of yourself in the right ways. Healing isn't about rushing into the next thing. It's about trusting yourself enough to move at a pace that actually supports you. This year doesn't have to be about proving anything. It can be about becoming more rooted in yourself and God becoming more self-aware and more aligned with what you truly need. Heartbreak has a way of reshaping you, not by breaking you down, but clarifying what matters and what doesn't, and if you take the time to move through it, well. You don't just move on, you move forward, stronger, clearer, and more grounded than before. So wherever you are in this process, be patient with yourself. Be honest and trust that this season is building something in you, even if you can't fully see it yet. I'm so grateful for everyone who's made it to the end of this episode. Thank you for being here, and thank you for taking this time for yourself. I pray that God draws you closer to him, gives you the clarity that you need and brings peace into your areas of your heart that still feel uncomfortable or unresolved. I pray that you grow in ways you never imagined, and that you begin to feel excited about your life again. I know there's so much more that could be said about heartbreak, and it's a topic I'll definitely return to. I'm still in the middle of my own process and I want to continue sharing from a place of honesty as I learn and grow through. If you enjoyed this episode, I'd love if you left a review and subscribed. It really helps the podcast grow. I've also linked a Google form in the show notes. If you want to leave a question for an upcoming q and a or share where you're listening from, how you heard about the podcast, I love connecting with you, especially those who I don't know personally. So if you want to reach out there, I will also link. The Instagram and the show notes, and thank you again for listening. It means so much more than you'll ever know. keep showing up for yourself. Keep growing I will see you in the next episode. Bye.