Saying Goodbye With Care: Helping Kids And Parents Through Pet Euthanasia

The hardest part of loving a pet is realizing you may have to choose their last day. We sit down with Dr. Mike LoSasso, Chief of Staff at Frisco Emergency Pet Care, to talk plainly about pet euthanasia in an emergency vet setting and how a compassionate team can guide adults and kids through a goodbye that feels steady, honest, and safe.

We start with the question many families quietly carry: should children be present? We share how age and comprehension change what kids need, why planning ahead can lower anxiety, and how to think about the moment from a child’s point of view. We also tackle a surprisingly important detail for pet loss and child grief: language. The common phrase put to sleep can confuse kids and even create fear around sleep, so we explain better ways to describe what’s happening without being harsh or vague.

Then we demystify the veterinary euthanasia process. Dr. LoSasso explains why sedation can slow things down, what the propofol anesthetic step means, and how that stage can give families a gentler window for younger children to say goodbye. We also talk about guilt, the weight of making the decision, and how our job is to advocate for the patient while giving pet parents time, clarity, and reassurance. Finally, we cover in-home euthanasia referrals for families who need a house-call option, plus real aftercare resources like follow-up support, a monthly pet loss support group, and additional grief hotlines.

If this helps you, subscribe, share it with a fellow pet parent, and leave a review so more families can find support when it matters most.

To learn more about Frisco Emergency Pet Care visit:
https://www.FriscoEmergencyPetCare.com
Frisco Emergency Pet Care 
11201 Preston Road 
Frisco, Texas 75033 
469-287-6767 

Transcript

Welcome To Emergency Pet Care

SPEAKER_01 0:03

Welcome to the Frisco Emergency Pet Care Podcast, your trusted source for expert insight into emergency veterinary medicine. Hosted by Dr. Mike Lasasso, Chief of Staff at Frisco Emergency Pet Care, this podcast brings you essential information to help protect the health and safety of your dogs and cats. Serving North Dallas with 24-7 emergency and critical care, the team at Frisco Emergency Pet Care is here when every second counts. Now, let's begin.

SPEAKER_00 0:40

We will take a compassionate look at how veterinary teams guide families, adults, and children through one of the hardest moments in pet ownership. Welcome everyone. I'm Julie Schwenzer, co-host and producer in the studio with Dr. Mike Lasasso, Chief of Staff at Frisco Emergency Pet Care. Doctor, it's always good to be with you. We got a big question for you today.

SPEAKER_02 1:01

Yeah, good morning.

Should Kids Be Present

SPEAKER_00 1:03

So, how do you and your team support pet parents and children during the euthanasia process? And I know that you know you've touched on this before, and it's uh it's a lot. So, how do you guys address it?

SPEAKER_02 1:16

It it certainly can be a lot, Julie. The presence of children during euthanasia is very much a I would say a family decision. Sometimes logistics kind of get in the way, which is why when possible, planning these things in advance is really helpful for families and kind of helps bring down the angst and the emotion a little bit. If we've thought about should the kids be involved, have we talked to the kids about what's going to happen? Really also depends on the age of the children. Are we talking about preschool kids or are we talking about high school students? Because obviously their level of comprehension for what's going on is a little bit different. Um, so it really varies, you know. But I encourage people to to really consider the process from the child's point of view. Um, and you know, some say, oh, the children have got no business being there. And I would argue that in a lot of cases, children have every need and maybe right to say goodbye.

Why Put To Sleep Hurts

SPEAKER_02 2:26

The danger we have in people is we've we've used this, and even the veterinary community is guilty of this as well, using this put to sleep phrase, right? This uh this PTS. When you use that phrase with children, right? Well, it's not accurate. We're not putting anything to sleep. We are helping them move on to a better place depending on what your what your views are. Um, but they're definitely not asleep. And if you use that phraseology with kids, you can make them afraid to go to sleep themselves. Um, I mean, you you create this this really scary thing around sleep. So not only is it not accurate, it's potentially harmful.

What The Euthanasia Process Looks Like

SPEAKER_02 3:07

In in our practice, when a family shows up and they've got young children with them, the process is fairly quick. The euthanasia process itself, from the time we start giving sedatives to the I'll say the pre-medication, which is propofol to the actual euthanasia drug. I mean, that can take, I mean, that can take as little as two or three minutes. Uh, it can be very quick, but it can also be a much slower process. And a lot of times that's why we sedate dogs before we give the pre-med, is so that they have a little bit of time for that to be a little bit more of a gradual process. And it gives parents that have kids with them the opportunity to give kids an opportunity to say goodbye if they don't want to be there at the very end. The other thing we do, especially when there are kids present, but this really applies to everybody, is that we give the drug I talked to about propofol. Uh, Michael Jackson made it famous, but it is not a sleep aid, it is an anesthetic drug. I've had it myself almost a dozen times. It is a wonderful, very smooth anesthetic drug. It's what we use to get patients prepared for surgery and you know, before we start gas anesthesia. So when we give that, they are anesthetized, they are not aware, but they're not actually gone yet, in 99% of cases. And sometimes people will keep the kids around for that, and the pet is no longer moving, no longer aware, and it gives younger kids especially an opportunity to say goodbye. But again, this this applies to some adults, and then a parent can step out of the room with them. Uh, in some cases, I've had entire families say goodbye at that propofol stage, and the whole family then leaves at the same time. So it really depends on age. Sometimes, if they're really little kids, we'll just bring in pretty basic kids support stuff, uh, coloring books and things like that for them to do because they're not really aware of what's going on, or they are, but they really don't understand the impact, and it gives them a way to be occupied. Um, if my social worker is there, sometimes she will actually take those kids into her office, and you know, she's got probably snacks and coloring books and other things to do so that um the the grown-ups, so to speak, parents can be present for that uh for that process. So it it really depends. And teenagers, they are really treated largely as adults, they need that closure, and the little kids really don't.

Easing Guilt Around The Decision

SPEAKER_00 5:57

And then how do you support parents who are struggling with guilt and making this final decision? I mean, it must weigh very heavy on your shoulders and Sarah's shoulders and other team members.

SPEAKER_02 6:10

It weighs very heavily on the owners. Um I don't shoulder that because it's not my decision. My job is to advocate for that patient. And if what they're doing is the right thing, then it's really not challenging for me to say, look, you're making a good decision here. You guys have done everything that makes sense to do, and now the kindest thing you can do, as hard as it is for you, is to say goodbye. Um, I mean, I say that, I mean, it might seem a little counterintuitive, but I think that euthanasia is a lot of times much harder on the families than it is on the on the pet, you know, at least from an emotional standpoint, it's a it's a very smooth process. Um, but it is it's challenging no matter how old you are, to you know, when we take guardianship of these of these pets and stewardship, you you end up in a god role. I mean, you have the power of life and death over your pet, unlike other family members. And being the one that decides that, I think it's it's a lot like making the decision to take a parent or a grandparent off of life support. It's it's that level of uh, oh, I have a lot more power and therefore a lot more responsibility than I'm really comfortable with, and um supporting people through that, through that second guessing and the fear of the process. We talk about the process, we give people as much time as they need to spend, you know, what I mean. A lot of times they know, you know, if they come in, they've already spent the whole day with them. But some people still spend another hour, hour and a half, you know. One partner will go to McDonald's and bring them something that's woefully inappropriate, but at this point it doesn't matter. My staff will give them candy bars, we'll give them chocolate to feed dogs. We know it's wrong, but I think it helps those clients say goodbye because it's it's always hard.

SPEAKER_00 8:13

And we talked too before, and you mentioned how important it is to have a plan, and you know, a lot of cases people didn't maybe have a plan for when it came to this time.

When In Home Euthanasia Helps

SPEAKER_00 8:24

And about being able maybe to send the dog to heaven at home is that something that your organization offers? Because you don't see that often, right, at clinics that they can actually go to your house.

SPEAKER_02 8:37

So we don't. When I was in day practice, you know, back in the 1900s, um, it's the one thing I would make house calls for in my day practice because for some cases, that is clearly a better answer. Maybe for the pet, maybe for the owner. Some people want that done. I don't have the staff to be able to do that. We actually have four practices in our area that don't do anything else. They are strictly in-home euthanasia practices. Um, and we give that information out to anybody who is considering that for whom that might be a better option. You know, um, a big dog that we've just diagnosed with a splenic mass or with lymphosarcoma or some other um some other impending problem where we know we need to make this decision within 24, 48 hours, but doesn't necessarily have to be done right now. Take them home, let the kids spend some time with them, say goodbye in your own home where you're comfortable, and have somebody come out to the house. If you've got a 175-pound great Dane who's not very mobile, getting him in the car to bring him into me is probably not going to help. Uh, just the physical, the physicality of the logistics become uh a barrier to what's going on. Um, if you've got a cat that really, really hates the car, or a dog that really hates the car, maybe having somebody come to you is is is a good answer. So we we absolutely support those practices. It's a valuable service for sure.

Grief Support After The Visit

SPEAKER_00 10:14

And are there any resources that your team provides for families after they they leave the hospital after it's done?

SPEAKER_02 10:21

Sure. Our um social worker counselor calls everybody the day after to see how they're doing and how she can support them. We do have a monthly uh pet loss support group meeting where people will come in and kind of share that the folks that are really having trouble processing this loss. It can be really helpful. The crematorium that we work with actually has a number of resources as well and has a phone number that you can call 24 hours a day. So there definitely are people out there who are willing to listen because some folks go through a lot. I mean, it is it is a trauma that has to be processed no matter who you are, but everybody's different in how they process that trauma.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

Well, thank you so much, Dr. Lasasso, and also to Sarah and your other team members, because you certainly show a lot of compassion and insight. I'm sure a lot of the pet parents appreciate that.

SPEAKER_02 11:18

Yeah, it is. I mean, I in my opinion, it's probably the most important thing a veterinarian does for a family is help them say goodbye. You know, we're generally not there at the birth, or at the, you know, generally most people aren't there at the birth either, right? They're adopting these puppies, or they're they're getting a form of a breeder, so they're not there at the birth either. But it's, you know, the vaccinations and the routine stuff is one thing, but uh helping them through this time, I think is just critical to the way we do it and can really change the way that that whole life, that whole experience actually ends up being for those people.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

Well, thank you again, Dr. Lasas.

SPEAKER_02 11:56

We appreciate you. Thank

Final Takeaway And Contact Info

SPEAKER_02 11:58

you.

SPEAKER_01 12:02

Thank you for listening to the Frisco Emergency Pet Care Podcast. To learn more, visit FriscoPetER.com. Call 469-287-6767. Or stop by 11201 Preston Road, Frisco, Texas, 75033. Open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Frisco Emergency Pet Care is always here when your pet needs us most. Until next time, take care of your pets, and they'll take care of you.