Season Finale: Not Your “Typical” Family… and We Love It

This week, we’re wrapping up Season 1 with a really honest conversation about our family dynamic. What it looks like, how it works, and how it’s different from the “traditional” idea of a family.

We talk about Abby growing up with two moms, the roles we each play, and Katie joins us on the podcast to share her perspective. We get into parenting differences, how we handle conflict, and what we actually love about not having a man in the house.

We also touch on communication, meeting each other halfway, and what makes our dynamic work in real life.

Plus, we get into our Hot or Not topics: double texting, claw clips, matching outfits with your partner, “grandma hobbies,” and being brutally honest, along with our slays and struggles of the week.

Thank you so much for listening and supporting us through Season 1. It honestly means more than you probably realize. We’re taking a short break, but we’ll be back before you know it, and we can’t wait for what’s next 💗

Follow along:

TikTok: @jesscreelman 

Instagram: @likemotherlikedaughtershow

If this podcast has ever made you feel understood or a little less alone, you can support the show through our listener support link.

There’s absolutely no pressure, just listening means the world to us. But we’re incredibly grateful to anyone who chooses to support. 💕

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:15

Hey, it's Jess. Hey, it's Abby. Welcome back to another episode of the Like Mother, Like Daughter Podcast. The final episode of season one. I can't believe I am even saying that. It's crazy. Um, well, we have a special guest on today. Um, we brought Katie on for the final episode because, well, I just thought it was a good time. Katie, how are you? I'm good. How are you? I'm good. Are you happy to be here?

SPEAKER_02 0:42

Yeah, I am.

SPEAKER_01 0:43

We're happy to have you. Um, so guys, this is not just the last episode, but it's a special episode um for me because yesterday was my birthday. And um, first of all, I want to apologize if you can hear Abby lip smacking in the background. She's just chomping away on some cookie dough. Um, and no, this is not sponsored by Pillsbury. But anyway, um, yeah, so yesterday was my birthday. Um, and we are sitting in a beautiful Airbnb right now. Um, we're spending the weekend in Shelburne, and you guys, this Airbnb is insane. So it's like in the middle of the woods. It's a little two-bedroom cottage. It has a beautiful sunroom off the side. It's like a porch with like a little swing so you can have your coffee, um, covered in windows. What do you guys think of this Airbnb?

SPEAKER_00 1:36

Well, the swing ain't little.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

Yeah, I guess it's pretty big. Like you can sleep on that. Yeah, you can lay on it. Abby was out there doing TikToks yesterday when we first got here. Um, but yeah, the sunroom's gorgeous. There's a little breakfast nook in the corner, and then outside, um, there's a big fire pit with chairs and wood all ready to go. Um, there's a barbecue on the back deck, and then tucked away is a hot tub, which I cannot wait to get into that later. Um, it was raining yesterday when we got here, so we weren't really able to um enjoy the outside, but that's definitely on the plans for tonight. Um, but I'm gonna be posting all the pictures and videos uh at the Airbnb on our socials. So make sure you guys go check it out there. So we're just gonna talk a little bit about what family looks like to us um and what it looked like, you know, back then. So what family looks like then versus now. Um so Abby, when you think about our day-to-day life right now, how would you describe our family and our dynamic?

SPEAKER_03 2:44

Well, you guys wake up at the ass crack of dawn every single day.

SPEAKER_02 2:48

Like at front of the door.

SPEAKER_03 2:50

Like, and like go to the gym or like whatever, and I like sleep in. Yeah. And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:00

What does our home feel like to you? Like, what does our house feel like to live in?

SPEAKER_03 3:06

I never like I don't want to be anywhere but our house.

SPEAKER_01 3:10

Yeah. Like I love that you're homebody because I used to hate being home when I was your age, but so that it makes me every time you say that about not wanting to be anywhere else but home, it makes me feel like I've done something right because it's your safe space. And I love that. Um, so Katie, thinking about when we were younger versus now. Like, what did a normal family look like when we were growing up? And how does that compare to what we see now in families?

SPEAKER_00 3:43

I've seen a lot of uh moms taking care of us while we was on play dates or whatever, and then the house shift when the husband comes home.

SPEAKER_01 3:53

Right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:54

Like the kids are outside all of a sudden.

SPEAKER_01 3:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

The mom's like getting plates together.

SPEAKER_01 4:00

Yeah, yeah. It's definitely a lot different. When we were younger, like it was so taboo, it didn't happen very often. It was more like a traditional style family. Whereas, like now, Abby, what were you saying about your family your friends? So, like, how many of your friends have both parents in the home, the mom and the dad? One. One out of how many people? Like, how many friends? Like more than five. More than five, yeah. Yeah. So so now when we think about like a traditional family, that's really not even I mean, old tradition, I guess, but now like a more modern family, there's not a lot of modern families that have a mom and a dad present in the home, right? So it's it's not as uncommon to have like a dynamic like we have with two moms instead of a mom and a dad. And I was kind of nervous about raising Abby um with two moms because I wasn't sure how her friends at school were gonna take it, how you know she was gonna get bullied and things like that. But I feel like when you look at what a normal family is, like, is there even such a thing as a normal family anymore? No, no, it's very different than what it was like when we were growing up, right?

SPEAKER_00 5:17

Normal is what normal does. And back then, normal was the family revolved around the husband, the man of the house. Exactly. That's what they were taught, that's what their grandmothers were taught. I think the new normal is just happiness, having a good attitude and showing up for your kids so that your kids don't end up the way that you ended up. And if that means a mom's gonna raise three kids in a two-bedroom apartment on her own, then that's what she'll do.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

Yeah, because back then we were just taught to like brush things off, right? Instead of like you just This is how it's done. Yeah, you don't This is how it's always been. Exactly. They don't do divorce they didn't do divorces as often back then. No. Now people are just putting their happiness and their kids' safety and health above anything else.

SPEAKER_02 6:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:05

What do we do in our day-to-day that makes our family function and flow and you know, make sure that patience, period, or at least trying to have some. Yeah, I feel like with our dynamic, like we have a good system set up too. And also I feel like we give each other a lot of grace when you know I'm kind of thinking of like host chores and stuff like that. Because like sometimes, you know, I'll fall off on my chores, like my duties or whatever, and Katie picks up the slack, or you know, sometimes Abby doesn't unload the dishwasher for three days in a row. And then I that's all I hear about.

SPEAKER_00 6:52

Everyone's gotta play their part.

SPEAKER_01 6:53

Yeah, and that's kind of what my next question is is like what matters more in a home? The structure of it or the way that people treat each other?

SPEAKER_03 7:04

The way that people treat each other, because how how are you gonna have a structure if like everyone's just a b?

SPEAKER_01 7:10

Yeah, or no one talks, right? No one speaks or no one has communication, or someone's always cranky, and like you guys can never find common ground, that's when you know it's gonna hit the fan and it there's just gonna be always chaos in the house, right? Yeah. What are the things that make our dynamic work well? And what are the things that we have had to learn along the way? Stuff that we had to work on as a family. Time management. Time management? Why do you say that?

SPEAKER_03 7:41

Because before we would all wake up like so late and like go to sleep late, and now it's like you guys are literally in bed before the sun goes down, and you guys are awake. Okay, you're exaggerating here. But you guys just go to sleep so early and so like yeah, you guys wake up.

SPEAKER_01 7:59

It's good for your body to sleep like that, though. I know too young forever. Except these last couple of weekends since like the wedding and this week, my sleep schedule has been so off. I didn't go to sleep until like midnight last night. So I'm surprised. But I still woke up at like 6 30, I think. Not even. Any other things that we've had to work on as a family? Do you guys think? I think like uh I was gonna say negotiation, but that's not the word. Compromise. That's the word I was looking for. Compromising, I think, is a good one because like with me and you, Abby, I feel like there's been a lot of compromise and like me being a little bit more open-minded to things that you ask. Like, but your curfew and like your sleepovers and just like little things that before I would be like, absolutely not, like you're not doing these things, but now it's more like I kind of see your per point, so then I give it a try, and then it just works.

SPEAKER_03 8:57

Yeah, I think we've came a long way with that.

SPEAKER_01 9:00

Yeah, especially with like phone curfew and stuff. Do you think anything?

SPEAKER_00 9:06

I I think like it's come a long way. Like, um, Abby's getting older, and you know, trust isn't just you not doing such and such behind a person's back, too. It's like trusting and being able to rely on a person to do what they're supposed to. And teenagers are at that weird place where like they know what they're supposed to do, but they're not doing it regularly, like going to bed on time, getting up on time for school, and stuff like that. So um she's come away with the being trusted for like a school sleepover here and there.

SPEAKER_01 9:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:45

Um, because you're doing what you're supposed to, and you know, if you don't do what you're supposed to, there's always a consequence. Whether you fall asleep and don't set your alarm and then it snowballs into tomorrow, yeah. With stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 10:00

Yeah, whether it's like a consequence that has given to you by like your authoritative figure or like or from yourself, or an environmental right.

SPEAKER_00 10:06

You want to get in shape, you gotta commit to the gym. You don't go to the gym, you don't get in shape.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

Right.

SPEAKER_00 10:11

And now you square one type of thing.

SPEAKER_01 10:14

How do we handle communication and conflict in our house? We just take a second. Like take a beam. Yeah, we just stop and take a second, I think. Well, for me and you. Mm-hmm. I agree. And I think when something arises that like causes a conflict, whether it's between me and Katie or me and Abby, um, it's usually like if it's me and Katie, normally it will be like we'll have a little bit of a disagreement, and then we'll, like Abby said, we'll take a minute and kind of step back, give each other a little bit of breathing room, breathing space, and then we will revisit it another time when we're kind of calmed down and be able to have like a productive conversation. And I feel like it's kind of the same way with me and Abby, like when we lose our temper with each other, or when we have an argument or a disagreement, um, we'll just kind of leave each other alone, and then eventually you'll come to me or I'll come to you, and you know, then we can then we can talk about it. Yeah. Um, and I think it's like important too to note that like all three of us do this. We all are able to like look at how we made the other person feel, and we're always able to acknowledge like what we did to upset that other person and like apologize for it. And even if we can't see what we've done wrong, but we know that we hurt that other person, we're always honest, yeah, and we always apologize for like making that person feel the type of way. Because I think that's a big thing, is like a lot of people who don't see themselves as like being wrong or like they didn't do anything, like they'll refuse to apologize because they don't see that they did anything wrong, but just because you didn't mean to do something wrong doesn't necessarily mean that you didn't hurt that other person, you know what I mean? I definitely learned how to like do that. Yeah, you do. Yeah, you've learned that a lot in the last little bit. Um, how does the relationship between us as parents affect the overall energy of the house? Well, I just mind my business, yeah. But like there's never any like big blow up or chaos, it's more or less just like maybe you can like sense that we're just like off.

SPEAKER_03 12:31

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:33

But I it doesn't like affect me. No, you don't feel bothered by it or no, like it doesn't make you feel any type of way.

SPEAKER_00 12:41

No, I think it's normal to have conflict, right? Oh, 100%. And just because there's conflict doesn't mean you should feel like you have to go hide in a corner somewhere away from it, type thing.

SPEAKER_01 12:52

Yeah, sorry, I'm trying to get comfy, but um obviously we're doing something right because she's not being affected by it. And then also we make sure that when things are good again, like I don't know, we make sure to just be happy with each other around her so that like the energy isn't gone. But it's not that's not something that we do in like purposely or intentionally, it just kind of happens. Like I find like when we have a disagreement or like maybe we're not talking for a little bit, we'll like avoid each other or we'll just go kind of do our own thing for a little bit. But then like when we do end up having a conversation, we always make sure to like just be ourselves and be happy, go lucky again after. And I like I said, it's not something that we do on purpose.

SPEAKER_00 13:38

We just that's how you want to show up, right? Yeah, like if we get in a TIF, you might go to the room, I might go for a drive. Yeah, like Ab going to the store for something. Yeah, take my minute, you take yours, and then we come back. She might know that there's something going on, but you know, you got two toxic substances mixing together, you know, you don't want to sting out the place, let's remove one.

SPEAKER_01 13:58

Exactly. Kind of like switching gears a little bit. What do we think? Like, Abby, what do you think? And Katie, you too. Um, what do we think that people misunderstand about families that don't necessarily fit the traditional mold?

SPEAKER_00 14:15

You know, like that the single mom's crazy, or you know, like nobody's ever gonna want to, you know, take care of some other man's kids.

SPEAKER_01 14:24

Yeah, and like kind of like I've talked about this on one of my other episodes, but how like young moms, there's this stereotype around young moms that like they know or they don't typically yeah, or they're raising their friend, not their child. Yeah, or they're not responsible, or like typically the story doesn't end well in stereotypical.

SPEAKER_00 14:45

No, it's okay. No, it's okay. Yeah, and it's it ends up being like the stereotypical, like um, you know, like those kids are screwed from day one. Yeah. Essentially, is the big one.

SPEAKER_01 14:56

Yeah, exactly. Um, okay, so what do you think about the idea of a family when not everyone is present or involved?

SPEAKER_00 15:10

Well, it's either you make excuses for the person who's only present here and there, or you know, doesn't want the responsibility but wants to like show up on birthdays with gifts and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 15:24

Who does that sound like? Um my father.

SPEAKER_00 15:28

And even if they're consistent with that kind of uh presence, yeah, and with only presence, um, it's still um you have to either as a family like accept that or yeah, you know, choose to not have the inconsistency and well like I made cal I used to make excuses for Abby's dad, and I would say like when he didn't call and stuff, I would always say that he lived out west because I didn't know what else to say.

SPEAKER_01 15:57

I said he worked on the other side of the country because he was around like once a year here and there, normally with presents, like you said, and then when he wasn't around and she would ask about him, I'm like, Oh, I I didn't know how to tell her, and I didn't want to break her heart, obviously. So I would just make up an excuse so that sh in my head it wasn't hurting her. I didn't want to hurt her any more than charity was.

SPEAKER_00 16:24

But that's because that's not something that you should have ever had to have said. No. Do you know what I mean? Like, no. Like that's not really your um your dust to sweep under any kind of rug. Right. Would you rather him just not be around or to have the inconsistency of like waiting Friday and then he doesn't show up, and then he calls Sunday and wants to take you from your plans because it's you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 16:47

Like I I'd rather him just be gone because like especially as a little kid, it's so draining, like wondering the like when the next time I'll see him. Yeah. Or like I wish that he wasn't in my life all the time, but I would go to his house like every second weekend, or like see him every second weekend.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

Yeah, like you know, and then it would go from you seeing him like every second weekend, you wouldn't see him again for a couple of months or like a year sometimes. Yeah, or even longer. Sometimes it would be like three. Yeah, and then for him to just like pop back in. So you're saying like you would rather just him not be involved at all than yes. Yeah, I think that's easy. I think that's honestly, if you're gonna be a deadbeat dad, just stay the f away.

SPEAKER_03 17:36

But I say like I wouldn't rather him be in my life at all. But a part of me would rather put up with the inconsistency than not have a dad at all. Yeah. Cause it at least it's like, well, I see him sometimes. Yeah. That's sad.

SPEAKER_00 17:53

And of course you'd have to hope too that like one day he'll change. Right, so I can understand.

SPEAKER_01 17:59

Yeah. Do you feel like you had what you needed growing up, even without him in your life? Yeah. Do you feel like anything was missing or not really?

SPEAKER_03 18:12

Well, obviously, I felt like something was missing, but like you kind of just hit it so well. Like you kind of just like made it seem not as bad as it actually was.

SPEAKER_01 18:24

Like you really felt like he was away from work for a while, so it didn't bother you until you looking at, you know, our life with Katie, and not saying that Katie replaced your dad at all, because I know that you know that's not the case and that's not what I wanted at all. But, you know, Katie, Katie kind of did fall into like a male type of role model, you know, role in your life, I guess. Um and do you think that that might have helped you feeling like you missed out on something? Because, like, for example, like when you need your vanity put together, Katie's the one that puts it together. When you need something fixed, your zipper's broken on your backpack. Katie's the one that you go to for those things. So, like, Katie obviously isn't, like I said, can't replace your dad, but Katie kind of fell into that role naturally, um, as like a stepdad or whatever, even though she is a woman. Um, but just that role. And do you think that that might have helped it feel like not so unusual for you?

SPEAKER_03 19:25

Yeah, because like I feel like even if my dad was with you and stuff, he would just not care to like help me with those things. Like, he would just be like, no, like figure it out yourself. But like with Katie, like she actually helps me and like she like does it for me. Like she literally did my I'll have to break her.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

I'll have to bleep that part out. Um Katie, do you feel like you stepped into a role or do you feel like it kind of just happened naturally?

SPEAKER_00 20:03

Um, I'd say it happened naturally, and I kinda like in the beginning, like, you know, there was some things said, you know, like thinking like, what are you gonna try and be a parent now? You know, and it's like no, like I I love this woman and I love her daughter, you know, me and me and Abby had hung out a few times and I like to spend time with her. And then when we got together and and things, um, you know, you'd be working or whatever, I'd pick her up from school, and you were always apologizing to me. And I'm like, no, like this is kind of like okay, if you're old enough to think like I'm gonna be with someone who has kids, whether they be a woman or a man who has kids in their lives, then you have to consider like you're gonna freaking have to help here and there, right? Like you're not just there to have someone pay half the bills, yeah, and then leave them to to do the parenting thing. And I'm not saying like, you know, you should immediately start disciplining them or you know, like just start acting like a parent all of a sudden day one, but I mean like at the the you know, the bio parents request, like, hey, can you do this for me? Like you should be willing. Um, but I always said, like, you know, I don't I don't feel pressured um from you to be a parent, and I I wasn't even aiming for that unless it developed into that. And I think the kids should choose, right? Like we've seen all them little Disney movies where you know the the stepmom comes in is like, call me mommy, and like that never ends well, right? But in the movies where they're like, You can call me Sarah, and at by the end of the movie, they're like, Can I call you mom? You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 21:46

Yeah, it's funny because one of my next questions was you know, do you feel like people expect you to be the dad? Um, yeah, I look at my haircut, right?

SPEAKER_02 21:58

This is a this is a

SPEAKER_00 22:00

Men's haircut.

SPEAKER_02 22:01

Well how would you describe your role in our household?

SPEAKER_00 22:06

Um, filling in the blanks. You know, like um if you're editing your videos, your podcast, or whatever, and then, you know, maybe it's slipped your mind the time, and Abby gotta be somewhere. I'll take her, I cook, I clean, you know, I'll pack a lunch the odd time. Yeah, you're also more so when she was younger because she didn't eat no lunch now.

SPEAKER_01 22:30

But now, like, I feel like you and her also have a good relationship too. Like, Abby tells you things sometimes that she doesn't even tell me. And Abby will come to you for things that she doesn't come to me for, right? So I think like over time you guys have built your own little relationship that you know is yours, and and I don't know. I think it's not necessarily like you're the dad role, but no, because she has a father.

SPEAKER_00 23:01

I never wanted to like even try to No, but I think like it's like you're missing your jacket. I got a hoodie for you. Yeah, you know what I mean? I'm the hoodie.

SPEAKER_01 23:12

Do you feel pressure in our house to do certain things like fixing things and like the heavy lifting and like all that stuff? Do you feel like that's your job in our house?

SPEAKER_00 23:24

I don't feel like it's my job. Um, but I was raised to like help load up the groceries. Like me and my sister were just two little girls, right? Like we were part of the household. We maybe didn't have a lot of chores, but like I'd help dad look mowing or you know, finding little jobs around. And I like being physical, so it's not that like I feel obligated. It's not because of how I look that I do the things I do. Right. Um, I was doing them with a ponytail. So I just thought I'd get a buzz cut and fix it, right? That's funny. Um, like, yeah, I'll I'll lift something. Like, if you can't lift it, if somebody got to, you know what I mean? Or changing light bulbs, stuff like that. It all just it has to be done, and I just do what needs to be done. So, like that's why I say fill in the blanks, right? Like if you were up there changing light bulbs, then I guess I'm going to the laundry room.

SPEAKER_01 24:15

Without needing the assistance, you let me do it or you'll let me, you know, kind of go. But then when I need the help, like you are right there to help me. And it's not because it's not because you're like, oh, I'm the man of the house, I'm gonna do this. It's more or less like my wife got it, but if she needs help, I'm gonna help her.

SPEAKER_00 24:30

Yeah you know what I mean? Pretty well on your own before I came around. So it's just like whatever, you know.

SPEAKER_01 24:35

It is kind of nice too, I won't lie. Abby, what do you go to Katie for that you don't come to me for?

SPEAKER_03 24:43

Helping me with like my zipper or like my TV problems, or just like anything drives because she knows I'm gonna say no.

SPEAKER_01 24:54

Yeah, she knows she's almost sucker. No, literally, Abby will or me and me and Katie will be at home, like just relaxing, and she'll come over to me and she'll be like, I'm gonna go take Abby to get her makeup bag. And I'm like, Oh, and I look at my phone, no text message. And I'm like, she knows at this point if she asks me to drive her anywhere past 8 p.m., the answer is gonna be no, but she knows Katie will always do it.

SPEAKER_00 25:21

The soft spot.

SPEAKER_03 25:23

Well, it's not even that I know Katie will always do it. I'm just like, don't want to ask you because you'll just go off at me. You know, be like, I'm literally in bed watching my show and I'm eating. Like, why are you even asking me that, Abby? It's literally past seven o'clock.

SPEAKER_00 25:36

And then I'll be like, babe, I'm really tired. Do we have to go night show? Yeah, I'll be like, okay. Get my shoes on.

SPEAKER_01 25:47

Do you feel like you have two moms, or do we both play a different role?

SPEAKER_03 25:52

I think you guys both play a different role, but you guys are still my mom.

SPEAKER_01 25:56

Yeah, but like we're very different in the sense of like Like is there a balance? Like, I'm a mom, and like you come to me about like makeup and stuff and like girly stuff, and then like Katie's obviously more masculine, so she's automatically, like you said, the person that you go to when you need your TV fixed, or like Yeah, or just like when I need to talk to someone that like won't give me for when I'm wrong.

SPEAKER_03 26:20

Because every time you're like, Well, why would you that? But Katie's like, Yeah, yeah, no, you did that.

SPEAKER_00 26:26

And then if it's really bad, then I'd be like, You know, I'm gonna have to talk to your mother. Like, you maybe want to talk to her first, or you want me to soften the blow because I can't keep it from her.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

That's so funny. And it's your mediation. Yeah, Katie's like the middle Kate. Abby will go to Katie to like test the waters, and then Katie will be like, Okay, you need to tell your mom. Okay, anyways, that's funny that's funny. Abby, what is the biggest difference between how me and Katie parent?

SPEAKER_03 26:56

You just you just do your and you're just f off, and you get mad at me, and you're like, Why would you do that? And then Katie's just like That is so not true. Oh my god. Okay, very rarely do I do that. No, but you just get mad. Like you're just like you ground me, you take my phone, like about it put me back on a cur. Anything. Like, I can't like put I hate when you do that. Like you'll be like, but what when did I do that? Like I can't think of it. No. I don't do that as much as I used to.

SPEAKER_01 27:26

No, not as much as you used to be, but we haven't run into like a- I think I have a little bit more of like an assertive attitude with you because when you tell me things that like you know you're not supposed to say or do, then I'm like, Abby, like, come on, like why would you do that? Because yes, I'm your friend, but I do need to be your parent first, and I do need to like teach you right from wrong. So like when you tell me something that you know I'm gonna be like Abby, like when you tell me that you are sitting in the bathroom for X amount of time in during class time, like Okay, but it I'll be like, Abby, why are you skipping class? Like I just need a break. When I'm like being like that with you, it's because obviously you're telling me something that I'm not gonna agree with, right? Yeah, no, I know. But where?

SPEAKER_00 28:15

Sorry. And now keep in mind, mummy's kind of like biologically all by herself. Typically, a mom would go to the dad and be like, deal with them because I'm gonna lose it. Yeah. Because women know they're emotional. Right, right. And so women tend to go to the man because the man will be like, Listen, kid, you're ping your mom off. She's kind of now putting it on me. Figure it out.

SPEAKER_01 28:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:38

Do something, or I'm gonna be mad at you next. And that's how it's dealt with. At least, you know, that's how I was in my home with a mom and a dad together. It's like mom took a care of a lot of the nurturing, dad dealt with the discipline when it got to a point where mom was like snapping.

SPEAKER_02 28:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:53

And at that point, it's like, oh man, get in here and meet with these kids. You know what I mean? Yeah. But mommy doesn't really have that because I'm not gonna come flying down the hall, rip the door off the frickin' hinges.

SPEAKER_01 29:06

Yeah, like parents, there's typically it's like good cop, bad cop, right? And you're normally like the mom is like the softer one, but then when she's too fed up, then she goes to the dad, and the dad's normally like the bad cop. Like he's gonna be the one to like penalize you and stuff.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

So like he hasn't even been listening to what you guys are yelling about.

SPEAKER_01 29:21

Yeah, and then so with our dynamic, I'm kind of like the the the bad cop, essentially, and Katie would be like the only cop.

SPEAKER_00 29:30

I'm like a a volunteer firefighter. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 29:36

Like, sure, let me come help.

SPEAKER_01 29:42

Calling for backup. Yeah, right. Do we ever disagree on parenting? And how do we handle it when we're not on the same page? Um, there are some times when we will disagree on certain things, not a whole lot though, because Katie kind of leaves the final decisions up to me and like kind of lets me take the wheel on all that because obviously I'm Abby's mom. And but I like to go to Katie for advice because Katie had a very different upbringing than I did. And we were actually kind of raised on like complete opposite ends of the spectrum. And so I kind of like going to her for it because I'm like, I need to know like more a more structured way. Or I go to Katie a lot too about ways to like have a conversation with Abby about things because I like Katie said, I get really emotional and I overreact sometimes and I react with my emotions, and then it just kind of makes the situation between Abby and I worse. So if it's if I go to Katie and I'm like, how do I handle this? It's because I know that she kind of was brought up differently than me, and then that kind of helps. But I think it it works for us a lot because I have the perspective from one end of the like spectrum, and she has a perspective from the other. So it's it kind of balances us out a lot. Do you agree?

SPEAKER_00 30:58

Yeah, because like um I didn't dare go against my curfew. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, if you're late, the door's locked.

SPEAKER_01 31:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:06

If you're late the first time, you lose your house key. The second time you're late, you're locked out. Yeah. Don't wake me up. You know what I mean? Mind you, I was in such fear of that scenario that I just went home when I was supposed to, and nobody's allowed to leave the table until everyone's done eating. You have to eat everything on your plate.

SPEAKER_02 31:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:26

Um don't be crying about nothing. Right? Don't talk to me, talk to your friends, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 31:33

Yeah. What is the best part about living in a house full of women? There's always tampons. And I just love I don't it's been a really long time since I lived with a man, but even when I'm in like the host in a house with other men, it's not the same. The energy is not the same. I don't feel not that the men in my life are like strange or anything, but I I just don't ever feel as comfortable as I do when I'm with you guys. You know what I mean? And not just because you're my family, but because you're women. Like, I don't know how to explain it. It's just the energy and the vibes are much different. And I think like like you said earlier about how if it was your dad here, like I feel like this would be about any men that like they don't care as much as like a woman does about anything. Yeah, like they don't they'll like downgrade it. They just don't have and also they're like the communication is different with men than it is with women. Um, men have way different standards of cleanliness than women do.

SPEAKER_00 32:47

Um listen, I work with all men in construction, and um I could definitely see at my right beach, what all the old biddies were talking about, finding a man with who's in touch with his feminine side.

SPEAKER_02 33:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:03

He needs to be able to read the room and communicate, uh, pick up after himself, um, maybe pick up after his woman or his kids too, right? Like um aren't exempt from that. Uh like I do know like the typical men, and then I know the you know the ones that are clean and do smell good, and you know they showered before work and they're gonna shower when they get home too.

SPEAKER_01 33:29

And yeah, and I just couldn't imagine, like, especially with how busy our household is, I couldn't imagine being with a man and me like the the amount that I work and kind of like like no one would ever no man would ever pick up the slack um that you do. I shouldn't say no, man. There are I'm sure there are men out there.

SPEAKER_00 33:50

But I feel you'd have to go through a couple dozen of them. Yeah. To find two or three of them.

SPEAKER_01 33:55

And like I just feel like I said, like their standards are a little bit different than ours. And and they don't pick up on things that we would pick up on as easy. And this isn't like a hate man hating episode. Yes, it is. Just like it's so different. Like, you just know things, right? Especially when it comes to like my moods and stuff. Like, you're so good at picking up on, you know, my cycle and like things like that. And so anyway.

SPEAKER_00 34:22

But that can also be like a like, I don't know if catch 22 is the word, right? Because it's like I'll be picking up on it, and then I'm like, why is she in a moon?

unknown 34:30

Right?

SPEAKER_00 34:30

It's not her time.

SPEAKER_02 34:32

You okay? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:34

Whereas like a man probably come home and not be bothered by all the emotion, right? Probably wouldn't even pick up on it. So hopefully he's a happy-go-lucky fella, and he just comes home and then it brings up the atmosphere instead of the opposite.

SPEAKER_01 34:47

Do you think that we could live with a man now? Not necessarily like a partner or or whatever, but say we needed a roommate. Like, what would it be like for a man to move in? Like, no.

SPEAKER_03 35:01

Like, I literally don't think I could ever live with a man in my life. No. Like, even when I get a husband, I'm gonna be like, you have to sleep in the other room.

SPEAKER_01 35:11

And make sure you put that damn toilet seat down. Yeah, look. That's one thing, too, that's different about it. Because when I go to like other people's houses and like I go in their bathroom and their toilet seat's up, I'm like, ugh. You know? Ugh. Put it down when you're done. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:29

Even the men's toilet at the gas station. Ugh. Yes, I've used that. The seats down. So I don't know why you're leaving it up.

SPEAKER_01 35:38

Yeah, it's weird. Um, so this is funny. Who kills the spider and how dramatic is it? Katie.

SPEAKER_00 35:46

The spider or me. Yeah, I'd be like, God damn it.

SPEAKER_01 35:50

I always call Katie to kill the spider. I'm literally earlier, there was a little tiny like beetle thing in the sunroom of the Airbnb, and I was like, Katie, what is this? Come kill it. And she's like, I'm in my soft feet. I'm like, I don't care. Go get go get your shoes.

SPEAKER_00 36:04

It's okay, we'll keep your eyes on it.

SPEAKER_01 36:07

What is the most man of the host thing that Katie does?

SPEAKER_00 36:12

All of it. Probably hacking in the mornings.

SPEAKER_01 36:16

Like my like my father. Yeah, father. Oh my god, grinning. Yeah. Every time you do it in the morning, I'm like, oh god, I got past this.

SPEAKER_00 36:25

Yeah, I don't I my dad did it too. I don't know if it's a man thing since I'm in smoking.

SPEAKER_03 36:30

He would actually wake me up in the mornings from doing that.

SPEAKER_01 36:33

Yeah, same. She sometimes wakes me up. Like, not always, because usually I'm awake before her, but sometimes. You can't help it.

SPEAKER_00 36:41

I'll be breathing and calm.

SPEAKER_01 36:42

No, listen, you gotta do what you gotta do. I'm not telling her glued together. I'm not trying to be a hater. I'm just, you know. Do you ever forget that your life is considered different? Yeah. Yeah. Always, because I'm so used to it. Yeah, same. That's why I think that this was so hard, this starting this episode. Like when we were talking about it at the beginning and it was like hard for you to answer the questions. I think that's why, because you're just like, this is my life. Like it's always been my life, so it's hard for me to think of it in any other way. Yeah, exactly. Let's get into the hot or not and the sleigh and struggle of the week. Um, so these hot or not questions, I literally pulled out of like random articles. I went through on, like I just looked through a bunch of different like Gen Z trending articles and pulled a couple of things from there. Um, so basically, Katie, I know you probably have listened to the episodes, but um, hot or not is where I'll talk about a topic and then you say if it's hot or not. Um, and then you kind of just like defend your point or whatever. Um, so the first one, sharing your locations with your friends 24-7.

SPEAKER_00 37:51

Hot not.

SPEAKER_01 37:53

I'm gonna say not too, because having friends that like know where you are all of the time, I just feel like it's not a healthy dynamic, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_00 38:04

Like, I think like if you have that one friend for safety, like as you get older, right, you stop sharing so much with your parents. It's good to have a safety net. So, like, you have this one friend you know you can trust or whatever.

SPEAKER_01 38:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:15

But I don't think that everyone that you know should know where you live, work, and know that you're not home.

SPEAKER_01 38:21

I agree.

SPEAKER_00 38:22

Because now your your house is left open.

SPEAKER_01 38:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:24

Anyone could go in your home.

SPEAKER_01 38:26

And you can't trust everyone that says they're your change.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

How many people are in my life today that were here 10 years ago? Not freaking many of them.

SPEAKER_01 38:32

Right, right. I agree. Um, double texting. Not never double text. I'm such a bad, I'm so bad for double texting. It's like I don't know why, but I do.

SPEAKER_00 38:45

I say hot because that's how fast my fingers are moving.

SPEAKER_01 38:50

Honestly, same. Um, claw clips. Not sorry.

SPEAKER_03 38:56

I love claw clips, so only for when I'm like doing my makeup or washing my face.

SPEAKER_02 39:00

I love a I love a claw clip update. You pull it off.

SPEAKER_00 39:03

Not applicable for me.

SPEAKER_02 39:05

What about for other people though?

SPEAKER_00 39:07

I mean, do you as long as it's holding your hair up. If it's half hanging down, I'll be judging you. Like, why is that either?

SPEAKER_01 39:13

That's funny. Okay, matching outfits with your partner. Hot.

SPEAKER_00 39:19

I think it's hot too.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

I mean, it's just cute. Like, what the f you know? I love it. Nothing wrong with it. Nothing wrong with it. Um, breakfast for supper. Hot. I love breakfast for supper. Give me some fking bacon and eggs any time of the day, honestly. Um, okay, this one may or may not be directed, not in a bad way. Wait a damn minute. Falling asleep with the TV on. Not hot. Are you Abby falls asleep with her TV on every single night, and I I just don't know how she does it because it ain't the pot calling a kettle black. Listen, I love sleeping in the pitch black with my rain sounds on.

SPEAKER_03 40:04

I put on rain sounds when I go to sleep, but before I go to sleep, yes, I'm watching Wintry Hill.

SPEAKER_01 40:10

Okay, period. Actually, I do fall asleep watching TV, but it's not like I need the TV to watch.

SPEAKER_00 40:16

Like what she literally You wake up and the TV's off because I had to get out of bed and turn it.

SPEAKER_01 40:21

No, I just mean like needing to fall asleep to a TV. Like some people need to fall asleep to a TV. I think like that's crazy because like I can go to sleep without it. I just choose not to.

SPEAKER_00 40:34

Yeah, like what?

SPEAKER_01 40:35

No, sometimes I do.

SPEAKER_00 40:36

No, I got light shining in my face.

SPEAKER_01 40:40

It's just balanced out by the Okay, I'm starting my my perspective's starting to change a little bit because I'm feeling a little attacked over here. Not trying to grandma hobbies. So, like gardening, knitting, sewing. Gardening's go gardening's okay. As I get older, I think hot because those things are like peaceful and like cozy and like they're good for the soul. Not that I do any of those things.

SPEAKER_00 41:08

I would like to someday, but you do though, you get old and like you appreciate them because you don't want to fill your free time like you're recharging time with either like bullshit TV or people's drama on the internet. So it's like, how can I slow down time but keep busy?

SPEAKER_01 41:24

Yeah, exactly. Um if they wanted to, they would mindset. I agree. I agree. Um, I think that's pretty self-explanatory. If they wanted to, they would. And if you know. Um being brutally honest with your friends. Hot or not. I'm too honest.

SPEAKER_00 41:47

Never too honest.

SPEAKER_01 41:48

I think it's I think it's hot too, because why have friends if you're not going to be real with them? Sometimes you need your friends to tell you like the truth and not just tell you what you want to hear.

SPEAKER_00 42:02

If you're not honest, then you're avoidant.

SPEAKER_01 42:04

Right. Yeah. And that's creates. It's true. So true. Um, okay, so that's all I have for the hot or not. So let's get into our slay and struggle of the week. Who wants to go first? Abby, you go first with your struggle of the week. What's your struggle of the week this week?

SPEAKER_03 42:21

My struggle of the week would probably be.

SPEAKER_01 42:27

I don't think I have one. I'm gonna say how cranky you were this morning. Oh my god, bro.

SPEAKER_03 42:38

Like, okay, yeah, that's my struggle. You don't have another struggle of the week, though? No. That's actually good to not have one. Being in the car for like four or five hours yesterday, bro.

SPEAKER_01 42:48

Yeah, that was a lot, eh? Yes. What's your you you know what we do for struggles of the week, eh? Katie, what's your struggle of the week?

SPEAKER_00 42:56

Um All of the events. Going away for the wedding, coming back here for two days, trying to help mom, and then the hustle and bust. Coming here with barely a bag packed was definitely my struggle. I definitely am a creature of habit.

SPEAKER_01 43:14

Yeah, that's fair. Being thrown off your routine.

SPEAKER_00 43:16

Yeah, I gotta go home to a dirty dresser. Not dirty, but cluttered.

SPEAKER_01 43:20

Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah, my struggle of the week. I have a couple that I wrote here. Um, still no washer. Not having a washer, working in my house has been the bane of my existence. I've been so frustrated with that. Um, another one is I fell off of my gym routine this week hard because last week was burger week. I was busy editing and going for burgers, and so then it kind of set me off. And I was staying up late so that I couldn't get up early, and then it kind of just trickled into, you know, well, the wedding weekend and then coming back and just adjusting. So my struggle of the week is I fell off my gym routine, but Monday is a new day, I keep telling myself. And the last one is that today's episode is the last episode for a few weeks, but it's kind of a bittersweet thing because I need a little break and and I need a break. Yeah, the comeback will be even better. Um okay, what's your Abby, what's your sleigh of the week?

SPEAKER_03 44:21

Probably Olivia's birthday party. Yeah. That was really fun. You guys look like you had a lot of fun. Yeah. I liked your outfit. Thanks. What's Olivia? It was cute.

SPEAKER_01 44:32

Uh Katie, what about you? What was your sleigh of the week?

SPEAKER_00 44:35

Um I got that blazer from for seven dollars and it fit me like a gloves.

SPEAKER_01 44:41

Yeah, that was good. That was good. Um, so my sleigh of the week was that I had two vacation weekends back to back. That was fun. Um, and obviously yesterday was my birthday. So um coming here to this Airbnb is probably like my best sleigh of the week. It's been so nice getting out of the city and spending time with you guys. And yeah, I mean, I'm looking forward to going back to normal routine, though, I'm not gonna lie. But I have been really enjoying um my time with you guys. But anyway, um, okay, so before I wrap up the episode, I just want to say thank you to everyone who has been listening. Um it's crazy that I have over 5,000 downloads on this podcast and all the people who have been reaching out to me, like mostly strangers, um, that say when they listen that they can really relate to it. And yeah, I just wanted to thank all of you guys. And we are taking a break, but it's not gonna be for long. Um, we will be back up and at it before you know it. Um, but in the meantime, you guys can follow along on our socials at like mother like daughter show. You can follow me on TikTok. Um, but yeah, um, thank you for listening to 10 episodes. That's like more than what, 10 hours? It's crazy. Damn. Thanks, babe. Um, but anyway, I love you all. I hope you all have a great couple of weeks. Um, and just keep an eye out because Abby and I were invited to the Echo Podcast Summit um in June. So we will be posting a lot there and talking about the event there. Um, but yeah, this is it. Love you guys. I love you guys. Bye. Bye.