SPEAKER_00 0:36

Okay, y'all, welcome. We're back. We're back. We're back. If you keep eating, what will happen? You're back. You're back. You're back. It's been a minute. First of all, how you doing? I'm good. How you doing? Basket robin's pink peppermint patty over there looking like a mech or a jug of Pepto Bismo. So listen. For real. Um we've had a break. We were on sabbatical. Oh, is that what we call it? Yeah, we were on summer sabbatical.

SPEAKER_02 1:07

Okay. That's what you want to do.

SPEAKER_00 1:09

We've been on trips, not vacation yet. Since the last, but we've been, you know, moving around. We've been moving around. We've been outside. We went to a couple of events.

SPEAKER_02 1:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Have we been to the rooftop since last time we recorded? How many weeks has it been? Two, three? Three weeks? Three weeks. Marcus and his wife are esteemed engineer, producer, extraordinaire. Him and his wife celebrated how many years? 15 years. So one weekend, it wasn't us, it was them. They were out uh the stars at night are big and bad. Deep in the heart of Twitter. That's where they were. So they had a good time. And you know, we support we support marriages. So that's right. That's right. If he says I'm not gonna be there, we said we understand. Please go enjoy yourself. Can we pack you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?

SPEAKER_02 2:02

Okay. What you need for the trip?

SPEAKER_00 2:03

You need some single. Him and his family had a very good time. No, they weren't. Y'all was in Missouri. I'm about to say that. I just wanted to sing that song. I just went with it. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 2:11

We were trying to let him be great tonight.

SPEAKER_00 2:13

All right, so let's do it. Let's do it. Um, we've had some good conversations. Y'all, we always talking.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 2:21

We're talking.

SPEAKER_02 2:22

It's always something to talk about.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

I really wish I could tell y'all some of the stuff that I say. Not yet. But when I say I'll say anything, I mean anything. Are you used to it yet? Yeah. You are. I don't want you to get used to it. I got to turn it up. So anyway.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

I'm used to the randomness of genre.

SPEAKER_00 2:45

I don't have any private thoughts at home.

SPEAKER_02 2:47

But why should you?

SPEAKER_00 2:49

It's a safe place. So tonight we've got some questions. Okay. We came up with some questions. Some questions came in, and we've discussed these questions on our road trips after work, whenever we have some downtime. And we just want to share them with you. Now, the last episode we did on Harlem Night. You be posting in real just trying to get us viring the wrong way. Anyways, I saw two people tussling. So he posted the clip when I talked about the guy who I'm excuse me. I made a post online and I said, and I shared it. It was really a shared post, but the post was so you don't believe that was what was it? You're talking about women. Yeah, what was the post? So you believe that Mary was good enough to carry Jesus, but not good enough to carry the gospel, not good enough to preach. That was the question. Okay. So I talked about the guy that jumped in my inbox talking about, man, you need to stop saying that kind of stuff. Stand up and let these women know what time it is. The reason why Jesus was born to a woman, because that was God's only choice. If God had another choice and the creator of heaven and earth. So the way that the clip is it comes in the conversation, I don't think it came, but I guess some people thought that I was in agreement with what the guy was saying, but I was we were talking about how outlandish it was. And the title of the clip was Men That Love Vagina, but hate women. Yeah. So anyway, somebody got invited to my blood party. So uh how have you been? Anything you want to share with us?

SPEAKER_02 4:44

I'm still here, loving life.

SPEAKER_00 4:46

She's got a work trip coming up, and she's gonna be gone for a week. Now remember the last time I told you she Where did you go the last time I said I need my medicine? You were gone somewhere. We did an episode in the kitchen. Um, probably we're social media went crazy. Well, you were out of town.

SPEAKER_02 5:03

We talked about when I used to be.

SPEAKER_00 5:05

You went on vacation with the girls. We went on a girls' trip.

SPEAKER_02 5:07

Oh, yeah, vacation.

SPEAKER_00 5:08

That was like three days. This is gonna be how many five days?

SPEAKER_02 5:11

Vegas was three days. This is gonna be five days, five days. That's what FaceTime is for.

SPEAKER_00 5:24

I don't know what I'm gonna do. I told John, I'm bringing the barbecue grill inside.

SPEAKER_02 5:30

I said, why would you say you're gonna bring it inside?

SPEAKER_00 5:32

I'm bringing the barbecue grill inside. We're smoking inside.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

I'm so you're gonna burn the house down while I'm gone.

SPEAKER_00 5:38

The insurance claim.

SPEAKER_02 5:41

Um no because that's negligence on your part. So crazy.

SPEAKER_00 5:46

We've been married 19 years. We always say this. We don't have all the answer sway, but such as we have, we give unto you.

SPEAKER_01 5:52

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 5:53

Our mistakes, our failures, things that we're learning, things that we have learned. Um we're evolving. She'll be 40. You'll be 40.

SPEAKER_02 6:06

You are 40.

SPEAKER_00 6:07

She'll be 40.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

Yes, I will be 40 on November 2nd. She'll be 40. Stand all gifts, cash app. Anything else you want to do to celebrate my 40th birthday, November 2nd.

SPEAKER_00 6:18

So I gotta be I gotta be event planner in November. Pay for me. So you'll be 40.

SPEAKER_02 6:26

You really about to smack that popcorn. Okay. You'll be 40. Yeah. And um and you'll be 41 in no in December.

SPEAKER_00 6:35

Not too much. So let's talk.

SPEAKER_02 6:37

Okay, let's talk.

SPEAKER_00 6:38

Oh, I brought that up because we're evolving. Yeah, we're getting older. We're gonna talk about some things that our kids are teaching us, and just some things that we're learning, and some questions we're gonna bounce back and forth to dialogue about in front of you all. Isn't that lovely? Let me tell you something that happened at work today. Let me I have an example about how I'm evolving. Now, I'm a nice guy. You are. I got a long fuse. I got a fuse from Atlanta, Georgia to Baltimore, Maryland. Okay. Now, once we get to about Charlotte, you might want to get you might want to get concerned. My fuse don't need to get to Charlotte. Okay. My fuse need Charlton, South Carolina, all right. But when they get to Charlotte, okay, wait a minute, you're getting close. Anyway, okay. I'm at work today. This lady comes in and she's telling Josie, she's social, she's, you know, and then she snatches, I'm helping her, and she snatches the paperwork from me and says, No, you're not doing it right. So I had to breathe for a moment. And I stopped her and I said, Oh, you're gonna be nice. You're gonna be nice. So she pulled the paper back. I said, Would you like to proceed? She said, She looked shocked because I stopped her and she said, No, I think I'm gonna leave. Something's going on here. You're damn right. Anyway, I'm evolving because five years ago I would have let that slide.

SPEAKER_02 8:09

That's true.

SPEAKER_00 8:10

But I think that the older that a person gets, you start to value life. Here it is, you start to value you. And I just value me. Here we go. We start. I just value me too much. I don't want to cuss. It's too early to cuss. I want to warm up to cuss. It's too I value me too much to put up with BS with the bull against me.

SPEAKER_02 8:39

You don't want people to transgress you, I know.

SPEAKER_00 8:41

Yeah, I just I I I I think highly of me. Okay. I I think I'm a big deal to the people who I'm a big deal to.

unknown 8:51

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 8:51

Well, why not just be a big deal in general?

SPEAKER_00 8:54

You wanna be a little deal, you wanna be a big deal. Now that big dealness also love believes in serving humanity, and you know, but I just don't let people handle me any kind of way. I'm sensitive.

SPEAKER_02 9:03

But can we like help people understand that you can be confident in who and what you are, and it doesn't mean that you're arrogant? I'm just saying, that's a side note.

SPEAKER_00 9:13

Okay, give us something that is changing with you as a woman. Wait a minute, you a mother of two. I was about to say something so crazy. So crazy. Oh, wow. Um, you're a mother of two. Yes, you're a nurse, yes, moving up in your career.

SPEAKER_02 9:31

Mm-hmm.

unknown 9:32

Oh yeah, my dog.

SPEAKER_00 9:34

He wants to be very inappropriate, guys. And um, you're good at what you do.

SPEAKER_02 9:39

Oh, thanks. That's nice.

SPEAKER_00 9:41

You're a global mother, and you can cook anything. You bake. I mean, just you you you just resourceful. Okay, tell us something that's changing, evolving about you.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

What is evolving about me is that I am granting myself permission to see about me.

SPEAKER_00 10:03

What does that look like? What is seeing about you?

SPEAKER_02 10:06

I just I'm deciding to just thrive in every area. I feel like um approaching 40, it has become vitally important for me to just be thriving and become more missional concerning my purpose, my dreams, my ambitions. I feel like I'm just such a lover that I always want to push other people to their goals and visions and dreams. And I'm like, okay, girl, but like give yourself that same energy. So that's what I'm choosing to do this season. Giving yourself that same energy. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:41

I love it. I think that um I think that as an individual becomes more connected with themselves, right? That you just take care of yourself a little differently.

SPEAKER_02 10:54

Right.

SPEAKER_00 10:54

You know, in your 20s, you could eat anything.

SPEAKER_02 10:57

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:58

Teens.

SPEAKER_02 10:59

I'm becoming very regimented, very different. What you put in your body.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

And you start getting closer to 40 and above, it's like, wait, I can't eat after nine. I can't, what's in this? Yeah, is it is it have gluten? Okay.

SPEAKER_02 11:12

I looked at my breakfast the other day, like, because baby, anything that's gonna bother me, it's not going in my system. It ain't even worth it. Can't do it.

SPEAKER_00 11:24

So I I uh I like that.

SPEAKER_02 11:26

What about you? I thought I already said mine.

SPEAKER_00 11:29

Oh, I won't let people, I'm not, I'm not up for being mishandled.

SPEAKER_02 11:34

Okay. Anything else?

SPEAKER_00 11:36

Dang, two. It don't have to be. I'm giving you the opportunity. I've embraced me.

SPEAKER_02 11:42

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:43

The version of me that, you know, the 2026 version of me. 2.0.26 version of me.

SPEAKER_02 11:51

2.0 2026. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

Like I'm gonna get it with who I am right now. You know, I got things I'm working on, things I want to grow in, but I'm not ashamed of me.

SPEAKER_02 12:03

He's also growing a mustache, guys. I love it.

SPEAKER_00 12:06

I trimmed it, you didn't know. I did. I was thinking about cutting this down here to be a firefighter, and I'm trying to be a firefighter. Okay, let's get into these questions. Not always called for firefighters in this seat. Okay, number one. Is it possible? I'll ask one, you'll ask one, we'll we'll both answer both of them. Okay. You rap, you and I sing. Okay. I rap, you sing, we'll see. So we'll make this a career. Is it possible? Do you believe that it is possible to outgrow your spouse? If so, what keeps you growing together instead of apart? What keeps us growing together? Is it possible to do that?

SPEAKER_02 12:41

I don't like the verbiage of the first part, but I do think that people say that often. Is it possible to outgrow your spouse? I don't think that you necessarily outgrew them. I think that the narrative may have changed. Like I think your priorities may not align with their priorities anymore. And so it doesn't feel like a fit. Um, and if so, what keeps you growing together? I think people both being motivated to continue to grow and change and evolve is vitally important. Because if one person is doing all the growing, they're gonna be like, You alright over there? Like, why are you stagnant? And the person who's not growing almost becomes envious, like, wait a minute, don't leave me, you know. And it's like, well, I'm really not trying to leave nobody, I'm just so I like that.

SPEAKER_00 13:32

Um I think that for us, I'll just speak for us. Okay. We'll just let y'all overhear our conversation about us.

SPEAKER_01 13:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 13:38

One of the things that I think that has been a component to our longevity is that we have very, very, very similar value systems.

SPEAKER_01 13:54

Right.

SPEAKER_00 13:54

And I think that when a couple's value systems don't align, if at your core you believe that life should be about this, and I believe that life should be about this.

SPEAKER_02 14:09

Right.

SPEAKER_00 14:10

If one person believes that the world revolves around them and another person believes that serving is essential for their existence, those value systems can clash, especially if there's not a respect and a regard for a difference of value systems. How can I compliment what you believe that you're put on this earth to do, and vice versa. So I think that we've learned the dance of um me seeing what is important to you and you seeing what is important to me, and then we hug real tight and see if they can come together. See if they can come. See if they can come together.

SPEAKER_02 14:48

But we both enjoy serving people. So I think that that is a very strong thread between the two of us. Dope. Concerning purpose, yeah. All right, all right, number two. What's one conversation every couple keeps putting off that they should have today? Ooh, that's a good one. I would like to hear your answer. You asking me? Yeah, I asked the question, so you have to answer it first. Oh my god, y'all. What's one what's one conversation? What's one conversation every couple keeps putting off that they should have today?

SPEAKER_00 15:26

Okay, I got one.

SPEAKER_02 15:27

Okay. Yeah, y'all see them. This is the eyebrows that me thinking real hard.

SPEAKER_00 15:32

I'm trying to think about how to verbalize it.

SPEAKER_02 15:37

Just say it.

SPEAKER_00 15:39

What's one thing that I do that you don't understand why I do it?

SPEAKER_02 15:47

Oh, that's good.

SPEAKER_00 15:47

You don't get that's a good one. Help me understand why you do whatever it is that you do, whether it gets on my nerves, whether it makes me mad, like help me to understand. I don't, I think that by the time if we do have that conversation, generally, this is making a generalization, that by the time we do have that conversation, if we've put it off, usually one or both parties are pissed off.

SPEAKER_01 16:15

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 16:15

And it's an argument, and that question doesn't land if it's an attack. Okay, say that I'm on defense mode. But I think that if we would not put that conversation off and really seek to understand, like, hey, why do you do that? Not in a condescending way. I really want to know why do you why do you do this thing? That could possibly be a building block for us to get closer, or it could be the thing that makes you or me say, because he or she wouldn't stop doing that, I'm out.

SPEAKER_01 16:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 16:55

If they would have, like you think about a you think about like two people who are not together anymore, both of those individuals would say, if they would have just did this, yeah, or if they would have stopped, if they would have refrained from doing this. So I think that having that question and not putting it off, having that conversation and not putting it off can save a relationship, can strengthen a relationship, or can cause a relationship to uh terminate.

SPEAKER_02 17:27

So bringing up the partner's behavior that may be confusing or irritating and not just letting it fester.

SPEAKER_00 17:35

Or mindset.

SPEAKER_02 17:36

We're mindset, okay. I know I like that, okay? Yeah. Um, I would say one conversation every couple keeps putting off that they should have today is what they desire sexually. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. I'm with it. Money and sex will kill a relationship quick, fast, and in a hurry. So if you don't have good money management, it's not the end of the world. But just own it or learn how to be better about it and be transparent and honest with your partner.

SPEAKER_00 18:06

Because we got to get it again.

SPEAKER_02 18:07

And don't be having desires and fantasies and not sharing it with your partner. That is crazy.

SPEAKER_00 18:13

Somebody decreed and declared cream, get the money.

SPEAKER_02 18:17

Dollar dollar bills, y'all.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

Cash rose, everything around it. Oh, I have so many jokes. But I like that. Yeah. Money, I agree. Money, sex. Somebody said communication or comprehension. Those are like the trifecta.

SPEAKER_02 18:31

But okay, if somebody is not comprehending, you knew that before you got in a relationship with them. So you kind of part of the problem, too. I'm just saying. Do it, do internal.

SPEAKER_00 18:48

The reason for your dil uh your delusion in present form. The process of your illusion. Delusion. Anyway, I didn't mean it. I'm I'm good cop tonight. So I thought that was so funny. Like, I loved yours. Thank you, baby. Sex and money. I feel like that's a good idea. Were you taught about finance? Like, was that something that you were educated on?

SPEAKER_02 19:14

H-E double hockey sticks, no.

SPEAKER_00 19:17

And people who don't like to talk about it, usually it is be it is usually because there's a lack of it. You don't want to talk about what you got a lack of.

SPEAKER_02 19:27

And not just like lack of money, but even lack of knowledge on how to acquire money or how to manage money.

SPEAKER_00 19:34

It can be an uncomfortable conversation. Um okay. I like this one. Don't be reading, don't get off the thing. What's one thing we've stopped trying to change about the other? I need all the couples to hear these answers right here. I don't even know what my answer is gonna be.

SPEAKER_02 19:54

Um, okay. One thing that I stopped trying to change about you, I think I just stopped trying to change you in general. Like, I just wanted to let you be you. I think sometimes we get caught up in like what society says perfection is supposed to look like in a relationship. And really, I feel like that is the thing that like smothers the essence of the relationship. Like, I didn't get with you because you were cookie cutter, like you, I didn't get with you because you was like every other man. I got with you because you felt so different, like you felt tailor-made for me. So then why would I spend all this energy and time trying to change what felt comfortable and tailor-made for me?

SPEAKER_00 20:38

What if it's what if it starts harming you?

SPEAKER_02 20:42

So you already know I'm about to say something if you try to harm me. Don't play. I'm talking about your personality.

SPEAKER_00 20:48

Let me be real specific. How do give us an example of what that looks like to let the person that you're with be them? What's that look like? Give us an example.

SPEAKER_02 21:00

Okay, so my husband loves to tell dad jokes, he loves to be quirky, he wants to like chit-chat with people, which is so funny because in the beginning of the relationship he did not. And I be like blank faced, looking like I already said hi. I mean, I'm ready to go when you're ready to go. And I don't mind just sitting quietly waiting. And I feel like sometimes it makes other people uncomfortable, but I'm gonna be trying to make them uncomfortable. I'm just like, enjoy. You can enjoy his personality.

SPEAKER_01 21:26

I get him all the time. Enjoy.

SPEAKER_02 21:32

All right, but you do, you like to crack jokes and all of that. And I mean, I just didn't grow up with people like cracking jokes and all of that, but that's something I love about you. I love how jovial you are. I love that you can always make me laugh. That's like an asset to me, so yes.

SPEAKER_00 21:50

Um, I got one for you.

SPEAKER_02 21:52

Yes, I'm listening.

SPEAKER_00 21:53

What's one thing I start trying to change about you now, especially? In the beginning to the middle of our 10 year old, my beautiful 19 years.

SPEAKER_02 22:04

Yeah, if I'm listening.

SPEAKER_00 22:05

Um, I'm just gonna let you get it out. She got to get it out. She's gonna, and that used to drive me crazy. And I did I just finish green show. And this is one thing that I I and it's still it depends on where we are, but I get it. But sometimes I be like, she talks, what is it, third person? Like somebody made it work, or somebody like somebody family or talk to me. She'll be like, and I told you. She didn't say she talks like she's talking to the person that did it, and she says, You. So we're at the gas station or something. She and I told you that I wouldn't go pull up with anymore.

SPEAKER_02 22:46

And I'm sitting looking like. Okay, y'all family now, right? Y'all been rocking with us for a while, right? So when I am sharing my personal internal thoughts with my husband, I literally go back to that moment. I'm like reliving that moment. And everything. And everything that I wanted to say that I held out of respect and love and honor for the people that I was engaging with. I get to be raw and unedited with my husband. So, yes, I do talk in third person sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 23:20

Not in the beginning, that can I just say that Yesy literally used to be like, are you mad at me?

SPEAKER_02 23:28

I'm like, you can do anything. I'm just trying to tell you how I feel. He like, but you talking to me. I'm like, I know, but I'm trying to tell you what happened.

SPEAKER_00 23:36

Man. But then it was it was embarrassment. Because I know it wasn't, but the people looking at me like, man, you better be careful, little buddy.

SPEAKER_02 23:47

I can be a very passionate communicator.

SPEAKER_00 23:50

One time she was having a conversation, and what she was saying seemed like I cheated on her, and I was like, this no good. Daddy, daddy. I was sitting there looking like, can you just say one time? You use a pro and you use a different pronoun because we be at a restaurant and she'd be passionate, going just talking about the situation to me, as if that person and the waitress come back. Okay, let me say this.

SPEAKER_02 24:16

You gotta let it get I love him so much that when we are engaging in conversation, everybody else just disappears. That's true. So I really don't be like even like acknowledging or even seeing all those other people. I just be like locked in, like, this is my person. I'm about to tell him about my day because I can't believe that she did and he didn't.

unknown 24:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:38

So it's cool now, like it works.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

But I'm a lot better too. I'm more aware. You are, I'm more aware. So, you know, I try not to do it in public spaces because he did bring it to my attention one time, and then I kind of looked around. I was like, oh dang.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

Is he does he beat you?

SPEAKER_02 24:54

Because I will go through a range of emotions, I'll do all of that and then start crying. They'd be listening like, what is happening?

SPEAKER_00 25:01

Scorpio, stand up. I'm trying to tell that passion. Now that passion is good on one end, but on the other end, you got to pay for it, okay? Everybody knows has his own. Don't do it. He loves his passion. But I love I it is a compliment to me.

SPEAKER_01 25:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:16

Now that I understand. See, this is what you this is what we talk about when you in your 40s. Talking like we old. Okay. I see it as a compliment that you feel safe enough to express with me.

SPEAKER_02 25:29

Right.

SPEAKER_00 25:30

Because it would be a problem if you was expressing it to somebody else. Why are you telling them they ain't telling me? So it is a compliment to be able to um be your safety, your safety.

SPEAKER_02 25:44

See, that's 19 years, y'all.

SPEAKER_00 25:47

But just uh, so anyway, all right. Uh you got the next one.

SPEAKER_02 25:52

Yes. Has becoming parents made us better spouses or has it challenged our marriage more than we expected?

SPEAKER_00 26:00

Now we got two teenagers.

SPEAKER_02 26:02

I would say both. Because I definitely feel like kids will try to uh divide and conquer. Like ask you a question and then go ask their daddy a question, or ask their daddy a question and then go ask their mama a question. And my favorite thing to do is what did your daddy say? They be like, oh. I'm like, yeah, no, you ain't about to try to create no wedge up in here now. But I also feel like it challenged us because you see your reflection in your kids, and you may respond one way, and it may be like triggering to your partner, like, whoa, why you do that? Why you say that? Or why you, you know, why you go silent, or why you so I think that it just brought up more opportunities for us to like see ourselves and how our children respond, and then like go inward, like, man, okay, well, is that what I look like when I be doing A, B, and C? So it definitely like generated some conversations between us just watching our children grow and evolve. Because, yes, as he said, we have two teenagers, we have a 15, almost 16-year-old, and I'm not gonna cry on camera right now. Whew! And then we have a 13-year-old that'll be 14 at the end of the year. Crazy. Yes, Casey and Jojo crazy. Confession. I literally cried because my son does not look like a kid anymore. He like really looks like a teenager, and I was not prepared that day. Here go John. Just let her get it out, son. She needs to get it out, son.

SPEAKER_00 27:35

I'm trying to, I'm trying to put him on game at a young age. You gotta still want me to get it.

SPEAKER_02 27:40

Mama, are you all right? I was like, I am, I, I am. I'm just gonna go get ready for work. I was just like, oh my god, like he didn't have that little kid look at all, he got muscles, and I was just like, whoa, when did all of this happen?

SPEAKER_00 27:55

Yeah, it's wow.

SPEAKER_02 27:56

It's a crazy thing. Definitely a crazy thing.

SPEAKER_00 28:00

It's like, whoa, you think that children, and I'm sure those of you who have children in the home could agree, will test the can test the gel of your relationship.

SPEAKER_02 28:17

Come on now.

SPEAKER_00 28:20

Because for a couple of reasons, their needs don't stop. They don't care about especially younger children, they don't have it in them to care about you need a break, you need a breather. Right. It is a constant demand, there's a constant need. And I think that for us, especially when our children were smaller, and even now, we have to make a point to prioritize our time together because so many other things, including our children and the responsibility of raising them, can bleed into our time.

SPEAKER_02 28:57

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 28:58

And we have gone through some very difficult seasons about parenting, like styles of parenting. One being too hard, one being too lenient, you showing this child more favoritism, etc. And I think that you you're right, we do see ourselves in, and sometimes we see ourselves in one child more than the other, especially different phases. And I think that, you know, behind closed doors, how we parent can really be an argument. I know some couples who have really had to go to some couples therapy behind you let the kids disrespect me. You don't, you don't stand up for me. Yeah, you don't back me up.

SPEAKER_01 29:39

Right.

SPEAKER_00 29:39

That's a real thing. There are people who are in divorce court behind how they wanted to raise kids. How they wanted to raise the children.

SPEAKER_02 29:49

That's good.

SPEAKER_00 29:50

So we probably could do a whole conversation just on parenting because there's no playbook for your child.

SPEAKER_02 30:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 30:00

There's no two children that are exactly the same, that are the exact same wiring. So the last point I say about this, and we're moving, um, one of the things that our children have taught me, and I think you would agree as well, is that they are a reminder to us that none of us have been here before. Yes. So I think that parenting for me has taught me another level of giving grace.

SPEAKER_01 30:24

Right.

SPEAKER_00 30:25

And just being there to help them try to figure out and not always trying to give them the answer.

SPEAKER_01 30:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:33

And I think that it's hard when you love your children and you see them trying to figure it out and you know the answer where you feel like you have the right answer, but allowing them to make their mistakes to discover this world has some very high level of evil in it. But this world also has some beauty and some love in it. And so releasing my children to this world that we live in, I told my daughter the other day, I will go to prison. I will go to prison behind you. Like it ain't, I'm airing it out. It ain't no. So I said, Don't, don't do, don't have yourself somewhere that will have me in prison because I'll John Q in it. Okay, I'm done. So uh I think that's good. That'll start me to hollering, but we love our children and we also love what we're building together, right? So trying to balance those can be a task. All right. That's true. Uh is it my turn to ask? I think you got a question.

SPEAKER_02 31:40

Do I have a question?

SPEAKER_00 31:41

No, I'm gonna ask you one. When have we felt the closest to one another? And why? When was the time that you remember feeling the closest to me?

SPEAKER_02 31:51

You know what's crazy? I'm really a believer that when it's good, it's good. I think that I have felt the closest to you in the hardest seasons of our life. Why is that hard seasons make you feel isolated and alone. Um, but I think we both did a really good job of reminding each other at the end of the day, it's you and me.

SPEAKER_00 32:15

Is that Tony, Tony, Tony? Who sang that? I hear songs.

SPEAKER_01 32:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 32:20

Is it just you and me? Um I was that was gonna be my answer too.

SPEAKER_02 32:30

I also think that like um challenging seasons reveal each other's strength in a different light. You know what I mean? Because it's like you're already so vulnerable, you're already so frail, and it's like, wow, you're really handling me with care, and I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

This is the importance, couples, singles, non-married folks, etc. Of having hard conversations and continuing to talk and to discover one another in every time frame of your relationship. So, like hard seasons can also divide couples, depending on someone made a statement that God did not harden Pharaoh's heart, but the contents of Pharaoh's heart were hardened. The same sun that melts the butter is the same sun that can harden the clay, and whatever the contents are, whatever the contents in the of that individual's heart will determine what the sun does to it. So, our relationship, like we've had some seasons where it got hot and it turned to rocks. But as we've evolved in therapy and conversations and arguments and maturity and our community and all the things, yeah, hard seasons blend us together. But that is not by accident, that's not by happenstance, that has been on purpose. So it's been hot. Last point uh in Forrest Gump, Bubba said, listen, we lean our backs against each other. That way we ain't gotta put our heads in the mud.

SPEAKER_02 34:20

Okay, well.

SPEAKER_00 34:21

Now they they they didn't have a whole bunch of social skills, but they knew one thing. We're from two different backgrounds, we've had two different upbringings, but if we can get through this Vietnam, Vietnam war together.

SPEAKER_02 34:36

Vietnam.

SPEAKER_00 34:40

Well, this is good. We gotta be able to put our backs up against one another. And it it is sad when a couple just can't get to that place when one person wants it and the other person doesn't. But you you're not gonna make it for an extended period of time if you can't put your back up against that other person. You just ain't, and some people be like, Well, why am I with you if I can't put my back up against you? That's a whole nother well, all right.

SPEAKER_02 35:10

Come on, let's go.

SPEAKER_00 35:11

Let's move.

SPEAKER_02 35:12

What does it mean to truly feel seen by your spouse?

SPEAKER_00 35:18

These these y'all be y'all be sending some good questions then.

SPEAKER_02 35:21

Okay, what does it mean to be fully fully seen seen by your spouse? That's a good one, y'all. I don't know who sent that one, but that's a good one.

SPEAKER_00 35:30

Naked and still accepted. That's what it means to be fully seen. I'm not talking about physically naked, but I'm not omitting it. Well, naked and fully appreciated, okay, fully loved. Well, my secrets, I think that for me, me being able to not have to wait until I get with the fellas to say something that is on my mind, yeah, or to keep it private, to be able to be with somebody that we can have a conversation about every subject, and it be respect, it be um mutual respect.

SPEAKER_01 36:16

Right.

SPEAKER_00 36:17

That is what to me feels like I'm fully seen.

SPEAKER_01 36:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 36:22

Fully seen. What about you? I love that.

SPEAKER_02 36:26

All right. I mean, I feel like that's the perfect way to articulate it. You said naked and accepted.

SPEAKER_00 36:31

Come on, naked and accepted.

SPEAKER_02 36:32

Please see all of my deficits still love me. I think uh you're crazy. I think just feeling safe to be completely vulnerable, which in essence is what you said. Yeah, yeah. Being naked and fully accepted. So it's like, okay, you can see my imperfections, but you don't make me feel any kind of way about it. You're willing to still sit in the room with me and be present and hear whatever is going on.

SPEAKER_00 36:59

Now, let me add this to what you said. I appreciate the compliment. I uh we can't run over that. I can't fully accept her. Well, if I can't fully accept me. I don't have no mics tonight. Let this dog be the mic. Jasmine, stand up and say it in the microphone. In order for me to truly accept this, we just let's talk about humanity for a second. Well, in order for me to see value and dignity in human, God bless you tonight. We not that you put the microphone down. I was about to let Jasmine say. Jasmine, you got something to say tonight, girl. In order thank you, I need my hands free. In order, we have a press conference. In order for me. What did I say? In order for fully accept me. Somebody you have to fully accept yourself. You have to be able to fully accept yourself. And this is this can be a major roadblock in the development of a person and in that person's relationship, yeah, where we are pointing the finger at somebody else's lack of growth, someone else's lack of change and evolution, but have not fully accepted the responsibilities that we have, the the the areas of needed growth within us. So I just think I can't fully accept you if I haven't fully accepted me and the areas of fully accepted the areas of growth that's needed.

SPEAKER_02 38:28

And I think that that speaks to the journey of a marriage, especially when you marry young like we did. It's like we didn't even fully know who we were to fully accept ourselves. So fully accept what right. We were trying to still figure it out on so many levels. So I think a lot of us bumping heads in the beginning was because we were trying to figure it out. Okay, you got is it my turn or your turn?

SPEAKER_00 38:54

I think it's mine. You just asked that, right? All right, here we go. I think this is good.

SPEAKER_02 38:59

Well, maybe you asked that one actually. Can a marriage survive if only one person keeps it room?

SPEAKER_00 39:05

We answered that at the beginning.

SPEAKER_02 39:06

We kind of did.

SPEAKER_00 39:07

Okay, I got one. This this is my last one.

SPEAKER_02 39:09

What?

SPEAKER_00 39:11

What's one thing that you've had to unlearn from our upbringing, from your upbringing about relationships? What's the number one thing or the top thing that comes to your mind that you have had to unlearn?

SPEAKER_02 39:22

Relationships don't work. What'd you say? Relationships don't work. What you mean? You asked me what I had to unlearn.

SPEAKER_00 39:31

That oh, that relationships don't that they don't work?

SPEAKER_02 39:35

That they don't work because that had me like bracing for impact. Like, when is the floor gonna fall out? When when is this gonna be over?

SPEAKER_00 39:46

Okay, can you build with that in your mind, with that in your heart? Can you be fully present in building?

SPEAKER_02 39:54

And see, I think that that's what's crazy because it was like because of the way I'm built and my personality, people who know me know me. It was like, I gotta prove that narrative wrong, I gotta prove that narrative wrong, but that narrative was still there, so it was like I'm still bracing for impact, but I'm like, but I'm gonna try to build, I'm gonna try to build, I'm gonna try to build, but ooh, if it fall apart, what if it fall apart? Okay, I'm gonna try to build, I'm gonna try to build, I'm gonna try to build. You know what it was like? Like playing a game of Jenga. You know, like you pulling it out, and you like, this one is this is the one. It's loose enough, I can get this one out, but you're kind of nervous the whole time, like, did I pick right? Did I pick right? Did I? And then you get out, you be like, yeah, I got it out. But each time you do that, there's a level of fear associated with the success of getting uh another block out. And I feel like that was something that I really had to unlearn because I was like, okay, on one hand, I feel like I'm succeeding because I'm like, okay, we we a year three, we a year four, we at year five. But on the inside, I still was like, okay, how long is this really gonna work? Holding your breath. Like, am I gonna wake up one day and the whole thing is gonna be flipped on his head? Like, and what made it more dangerous is it was just kind of like a thought in the back of my brain. It wasn't even something that I was bringing up, but I still was like bracing for impact.

SPEAKER_00 41:21

Now, in your childhood, can you remember any event that made you feel like that?

SPEAKER_02 41:25

Where yeah, my mom got divorced like five, six times. Yeah, and I said five, six times. I guess five, six times. Who's gonna stop you? And my daddy wasn't one of them. So y'all do the math. So, I mean, I remember vividly my mom's response every time a relationship failed. I remember her tears, I remember her sobbing, and I remember me and my brother consoling her. And I remember thinking internally, I will never do this. I I will never let a man break me to the point that my kids have to try to put me back together. I was like, Oh, absolutely not. Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_00 42:05

Ain't no nigga out here.

SPEAKER_02 42:07

Okay. I was trying to censor myself, but literally, I as a kid, while I'm rubbing my mother's back while she cries, because she feels ashamed and she feels embarrassed and she feels defeated. I was like, Oh, never do that. Nah, man.

SPEAKER_00 42:25

I see when that started.

SPEAKER_02 42:26

Yeah, nah. Nah.

SPEAKER_00 42:30

So that that I got you.

SPEAKER_02 42:34

But I feel like because that thought process was there, I was really limiting myself. I was limiting the potential of our relationship, I was limiting our growth because there was so much fear attached to but when is it gonna fall apart? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I noticed that as I released that thought process, things began to flourish in a very organic way, and it just became easy.

SPEAKER_00 43:00

You just said a mouthful. I'm done.

SPEAKER_02 43:04

Um so I'm gonna see what's your answer.

SPEAKER_00 43:08

What's one thing I've had to unlearn from my upbringing? My upbringing. Don't live for their approval. You don't. Do not I'm telling I'm telling John this whether they clap or not, be true to you. Okay, like no one has a heaven or a hell to put you in. They're just opinions.

SPEAKER_01 43:45

Right.

SPEAKER_00 43:45

They're just they're just words. And I think that I had to unlearn that about relationships because I saw people conduct their life growing up. In a way that it seemed to me as though they did it because it was what was expected. Like this is the status quo. This is what we should be. My mama did it, my dad did it. Like we just following the tradition. I love coming to America. I love the movie Coming to America because he grew up in a tradition that this is the way we do it. But he said, I'm on deconstruction, folks. He said the way y'all do it. I don't want to do it the way y'all do it. I don't like the way y'all do it. And I will lose I gotta do a big potato one now. I will lose everything that has been inherited to me to live authentically.

SPEAKER_01 44:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:48

And I want a woman that wants me because she wants me. And I want a woman that has a brain and that can think and that has a mind, not is a servant of mine. Ooh, I want to bite this mic. Ah, not bite. It's crazy. That's one thing I've had to unlearn about relationships. Like yours doesn't have to be the way that whoever before you was, because you're an individual. And had I, this is my last point. Here's a goal for five praises. Jazz, wake up. Um had I tried to fit my relationship in the box that was the boxes that were before me, we would not be sitting on this gray couch with this weenie dog in between us doing this podcast because we would not be together.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

Can you say that one more time for the people in the back?

SPEAKER_00 45:46

If I would have lived in the mindset box of the frame of those who were couples before me, if I would have tried to do our relationship the way that I saw theirs conducted, we would not be sitting on this gray couch. Jasmine, wake up, sitting on this couch doing this marriage vlog because we would not be together.

SPEAKER_02 46:07

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 46:07

And so I my unlearning process was so liberating. It's the reason why we're together. My conformity to the box is not the reason why we're together. My breaking, ooh, I want to cuss so bad. Me daring to do it differently than those who came before me did it because it was authentic to me.

SPEAKER_02 46:31

Come on and say that, sir. That's why we're together. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 46:34

We're together because I did not do it the way that I saw it done. So when my mother comes over to visit and we might say something or have a conversation, sometimes my mother clutches her pearls and she ain't got none on. But she's it I it's a beautiful thing for her to see us still love one another, still honor one another, still take the principles that she gave me that works for me, that works for us, the principles of love, the principles of serving God, the principles of serving your community. Like my mother's is extremely benevolent, community-oriented woman. So all of the good, all that did fit that she taught me, and those before her that taught her, I use them. We got our ancestors on the wall in the living room. But everything that did not work. Okay. We said you gotta go. Come on. This is not even the same son that that our answer. It can't be something is wrong somewhere for it to be 105 degrees outside. You put a uh an egg on your back, it will bait. So my last point. We are still together because we chose to do it differently. Come on. Than those who came before us while still honoring the sacrifice, while still honoring the the journey of those, your mama.

SPEAKER_02 47:55

Come on. My mama. Shout out to black men. Respect, honor, shout out to black men. All the sacrifices that our mothers made, but we also learned lessons from the mistakes they made and chose to do it differently. Jesus.

SPEAKER_00 48:09

Is that good?

SPEAKER_02 48:10

We honored. I will forever honor the sacrifices that my mama made to get me too. I just can't do the same thing. But I also learned from every one of her mistakes, which is what every parent wants. Okay. Oh God. A parent wants you to be better and stronger and more vibrant and just more successful in all of the things than them. I tell my kids that all the time. We are setting the stage for you to be better because you are our legacy. What you say?

SPEAKER_00 48:40

Now, any real, any true parent wants their child to do it. Be better than me. Do it better. You should take what I gave you.

SPEAKER_02 48:50

I had to tell my teenage daughter, girl, if you fail, don't you know I fail? Come on. Maybe I only succeed if you succeed.

unknown 48:55

Oh no.

SPEAKER_02 48:57

So, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:58

This is good. All right, that's good. So we love our parents, grandparents. Absolutely. We know that they did the best that they could. Absolutely. They did some stuff that we would not be able to do. Some stuff they put up with. Some stuff that if we if we were to be.

SPEAKER_02 49:12

I can't be a single parent, y'all. Okay. Let me just justify. Actually, I don't have to be. You could have been a single parent. It's 2026.

SPEAKER_00 49:25

And I would have to be.

SPEAKER_02 49:26

Okay. But I don't have the capacity to be a single parent. What would you do? You could be a single parent. Did you not hear me the first time? I don't understand what you're saying. You have to what? I'll take weekends, you got Monday through Fridays. Oh, let me let me spell it out. Single? Yeah. I'll take the kids on the weekend and you can have Monday through Friday. I just don't have the capacity. I don't feel like I can do anything. I put my mind to popcorn. Yes, he has. You've been so extra. I literally have told you this before. I have literally. I would get money listed. I take my hat off to my mama because she took care of everything. Things I wasn't even thinking about as a kid. And as an adult, like looking back at the sacrifices that this woman had to make with the rules that she had like pressed on her. I was just like, I was like, oh, bro, you you operating in a whole nother level of strength and compassion and endurance. I ain't got it like that.

SPEAKER_00 50:36

Well, let's go back.

SPEAKER_02 50:37

She a goat. I ain't I ain't got it like that.

SPEAKER_00 50:39

I would get five days a week and you would get the weekends.

SPEAKER_02 50:42

You would have Monday through Friday. What would you be doing during the week? Minding my good business. Wow. Minding my good business. And I would be that fun mama from Friday evening to Sunday evening. Why tell you you sleep with people that you don't know who the I mean I might do a week on a week out. But I'm just saying, listen, I ain't gonna be able to do that.

SPEAKER_00 51:09

Share two brushes with them on accident. You think you know?

SPEAKER_02 51:13

Accident? You like to use my stuff y'all. He's violating my personal stuff. Really? Really? Yeah. Wow. I don't think that I have You ain't built for it. No. Do you know what type of mental strength you have to have to play mom and dad? Shout out to the single mom. Why the dad is like across town just parlaying? What about the single dad? I would go off. Do you know I would blow your spot up so tough? If you tried to be across town just kicking it like everything was okay, Kiki.

SPEAKER_00 51:49

If I was a weekend daddy and you was mystery Friday?

SPEAKER_02 51:52

No. Okay, first of all, my mama was a single parent that didn't get a break. Okay. There was no weekend dad. 24-7. My brother's dad was incarcerated, and my dad, I ain't even gonna speak on it. But the nigga was in Tulsa, not doing nothing. You just spoke on it. Okay. You just trying to speak on it. Okay. Yeah. Wow, that's good. So for her to have to do it 24-7, 365, like no break. I'd be like, I need my breaks. I need to be able to be like, I'll be back, y'all. Like, you're the teenagers. That's what I'm saying. She was only allowed to do that when she went to work, and work is another job. Like, she literally went from one job to the other job, and she kept us in like sports, she kept us in activity, she kept us in clubs. And I'm like, girl, how? How was you affording all of that? How was you doing all of that? How did you have enough time for all of that? Like, she basically sacrificed her life for us.

SPEAKER_00 52:54

And I'm like, and I think that's what I'm I'm done. We're done. But I think that's so beautiful to be able to hold to both in the same bowl.

SPEAKER_02 53:08

Yeah, there's some things that I will never repeat that I have seen my mom like do and live through. But when I say mad respect, nobody measures up to my mama because I saw the sacrifices she made. I was in imitated. Listen, I was there in real time, and I would not be Britney without her. Period. I would not be the multifaceted woman that he is referring to without her.

SPEAKER_00 53:34

She was laying down the other night and the lights were off and she turned over.

SPEAKER_02 53:40

I look a lot like she's back. Yes. My mother is definitely embedded on the inside of me. I carry her with me every single day. Yes. Sweet. So Whitney.

SPEAKER_00 53:55

Let me give you want to give one last word of advice to those who are watching. First of all, if you've watched the entire episode, make sure you hit the like button. If you're not subscribed, please like and follow. Please subscribe to the channel. I was at work the other day and somebody said, You and your wife do a podcast, don't you? I said, Who's asking? She said, I said, How did you find out? She said, A friend of mine, thank you. A friend of mine sent me a reel or something that you all did. She said, Y'all keep doing, y'all keep it 100. Ain't no way they do it, but keep it 100. I said, Sure, you're right, right, right. So, two, before you give your last um Britney's thought, we're in a competition. Marcus is the one who actually entered us into this competition for America's favorite couple. So we're in the top, I think, 12. We're in the top 12, which is crazy. I don't know how many couples are in there.

SPEAKER_01 54:53

That is crazy.

SPEAKER_00 54:54

We're in the top 12. So if you're watching this, if you see this video before the competition is over. When is it over, Marcus? Uh so we are in currently the top uh. We're currently getting ready to go to the top 10. So we have three more rounds. So if you when you see this video, you still have time. Will you drop the link so they can vote? So every day you can vote for free. One per person. I think it links to your Facebook account, and then they have tiers where you can pay. If we win, we go to LA, uh, they fly us out and $20,000. So if you want to support the platform without spending any money, your vote would be greatly appreciated by the both of us. Absolutely. And we would use, and we we wrote it in the description that we would use a portion of that $20k to um up our um media presentation. We would we would invest it back in the podcast, a portion of that, to make sure that we can take this to the next level. So if y'all love what we're doing, if y'all love what we're talking about, if this is helping you, help us take it to the next level. We got couches to sit on, we got books to write. We just getting started. So shout out to those of you who have already voted. You can vote once. Thank you for the support. Thank you in advance. Okay, Brittany's final thought. What advice would you give the listeners tonight? Because they've watched the whole episode.

SPEAKER_02 56:29

Extend yourself grace and mercy, love fiercely, and just be open to what each day brings. I got to close. I would say seriously, like offer yourself the gift of being present in real time because so often I feel like we spend so much time and energy and thinking about what's next or what we've done that we wish we would have done different, that we missed that moment that we're currently in. And there's nothing like the present, like, there's nothing like experiencing love and joy in the present. Like, it's just so needed, it's so like fulfilling to just experience those things in real time with people that you love and care about.

SPEAKER_00 57:25

I love that.

SPEAKER_02 57:27

What are John's final thoughts?

SPEAKER_00 57:29

My final thoughts are when I look at the stars, I love the look at them. We look at the stars just about every clear night because it is something that humans can't touch. Something that we'll never be able to touch. They'll be here after we're gone, and they were here before we got here.

SPEAKER_02 57:46

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 57:47

And it reminds me that none of us know it all. And we only know a fraction. A fraction, a millifraction. And I would encourage you to live your life to the fullest. Yes. Honor God, honor your creator, honor yourself, and share that love with people. Last point the only thing that people can do is talk. So we are only here for a short.

SPEAKER_02 58:20

Baby, give them something to talk about. That's what I say.

SPEAKER_00 58:23

Something to talk about. We're only here for a short time. That's right. And this life is too short to spend it for the approval of people. For the approval of people. Do what you were created to do. That's right. Unapologetically. If you must pivot, pivot. If you must switch it up, switch it up. If it's okay to make mistakes, stay, stay if you must make a mistake. But all of our mistakes have already been calculated in. Yes. Our creator knows. Okay, this is my point for it. It took me back to this. We were on the beach in our last vacation, and something dawned on me that every grain of sand is different. Come on. Did y'all hear what I just said? Every grain of sand is different. So our creator, the source, God, whatever you call the creator, is so creative that no two grains of sand are the same. So it helps me to refocus and to just be me. To be me in every room, to be me in our relationship.

SPEAKER_01 59:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 59:33

And I'm just glad I get to um that I'm in a relationship. Molly, you endangered, girl. To be in a relationship where I can be myself.

SPEAKER_01 59:45

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 59:46

Because it's a prison. And some of you know. It's a prison to be somewhere where you can't be you. Whether that's in your head or whether that's in your house. I can't hear nobody in here tonight. Well, it is a prison. And life is too short to live in a prison. A prison.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:07

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:09

I'm not going to the prison for Newton. I've been to prison before.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:12

Nobody.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:14

Metaphorically. And uh, I don't wish it on my worst enemy. On my worst enemy. I ain't got no enemies.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:22

And honestly, it's worse to be free but be in prison. They call it incarcerated.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:28

We got to go tonight. Because I feel like so. Live your life. Yes. Live it. You were put on this earth to do something, and your marriage is not the end all be all.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:40

Marriage is just a notch in the bell. It's just a part of the journey. If you decide to get married.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:46

Yeah, and it's okay if you decide not to get married.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:49

And if you divorce, you still got value.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:51

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:51

You get cheated on. If you're the one that cheated, you still got value. I'm just trying to say everybody.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:57

I heard Usher in my head when you said that though. What's up? You're the one who hooked us up knowing it should have been you.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:03

So if you chose wrong and you need to choose again, just be tired about it. Yeah. You know.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:09

Life is full of lessons.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:10

My parents divorced and we sitting on this couch 19 years in the game.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:15

So my parents never married.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:16

Okay, which is my mom was married.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:18

And we sitting there on the couch too.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:20

How many times your mom was married?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:21

Okay, let me try to count.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:23

Or divorced.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:26

Damn. I think five times. But that doesn't include my father because she was not married to him. So that's a story for another day, y'all. I'm gonna have a confessional with y'all one day.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:38

Come on, see what all we're saying is what the bad that happened before you doesn't have to define the future.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:46

Well, all right.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:47

Every episode, we always close. Where's my mic at? We always close with this that marriage is for grown folk.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:54

We love y'all. Peace. Bye, okay.