Don’t Ever Ask About Your Father Again

What if your father’s childhood was a handful of strange fragments, a “castle,” a room with 25 beds, hunger, silence, and a single forbidden question.

Filmmaker David Quint grew up sensing his dad was different, but nobody explained why. His father, Urban, had been raised in a 700-year-old Swiss castle that served as an orphanage, then at age 12 received a letter that changed everything: “You’re not an orphan. I’m your mother. You’re coming to America.”

He arrived in Philadelphia alone, not speaking English, looking for a woman in a pink scarf, and learning in real time what a mother even was. When he asked about his “real father,” his mother shut it down, and the subject became off limits for life.

Decades later, David made one decision that changed his relationship with his father forever. He emailed the castle.

What came back was proof, records, a name, and a path that led David and his dad back to Switzerland, with an old iPhone recording every moment. The trip brought long-buried memories to the surface, reunited his father with the boy who slept in the bed next to his, and ultimately uncovered answers that no one saw coming.

David’s documentary, Father Unknown, will be screened at Untangling Our Roots, and in this conversation, he shares the real story behind the film, what it meant to watch his father become fully human in front of him, and how discovery can heal what decades of silence could not.

Also, full transparency, we recorded this episode during an emotional week at home. Our beloved 11-year-old mini Dachshund Frankie was hospitalized and undergoing two surgeries, he is deeply bonded with Corey, and you’ll hear how tender this moment was. David met that reality with kindness and grace, and we’re grateful.

In this episode, we talk about

• Growing up with “fragments” of a parent’s past, and no context
• A Swiss orphanage inside a 700-year-old castle
• The letter that sent a 12-year-old alone to America
• The forbidden question, who is my father
• Returning to the place it all began, and what it unlocked
• Reunion, revelation, and the relationship shift that followed
• Why stories like these land so hard, even when you know the ending

If this episode hits home
Please share it with someone who’s navigating adoption, donor conception, NPE discovery, or any kind of identity rupture. And if you’ll be at Untangling Our Roots, add David’s screening to your must see list.

Guest Bio: David Quint

David Quint has worked in the film industry for 30 years as a director, cinematographer, and aerial cameraman, filming projects for Netflix, MTV, NBC, ABC, CBS, and other networks, along with feature films, documentaries, and commercials. He discovered his passion for storytelling as a boy growing up in Western Colorado, and after decades of working with state-of-the-art motion picture cameras, he never imagined he would unintentionally capture his most personal film on an iPhone 3. That film became Father Unknown, a deeply human story of family, identity, reunion, and the questions that echo across generations.

Transcript

Kendall 0:00

Welcome back to Family Twist. I'm Kendall. Before we get into this episode, I want to share a little context about the moment in time when we recorded it. While Corey and I were sitting down with David Quint, our beloved 10-year-old miniature docs and Frankie was in the hospital undergoing two surgeries. Frankie's not just, quote, one of the dogs. He's Corey's shadow, his constant companion, the one who curls up against him when we record, the one who follows him from room to room, the one who somehow knows when Corey needs to be grounded. So when you hear Corey get emotional in this conversation, know that it wasn't just the power of David's story, it was that he and I were going through something really raw. We were fragile, we were waiting on updates from a vet while talking about father's orphanages lost and reunion, and David handled it with so much grace. This episode is about his documentary Father Unknown, the story of his father growing up in a 700-year-old Swiss castle that functioned as an orphanage, and what happens when David decides to take his dad back there decades later, iPhone in hand, recording everything. What unfolds is Discovery Reunion and the kind of identity shift that so many of us in this community understand. We also talk about Untangling Our Roots, where David will be screaming the film. And if you've ever been to Untangling Our Roots, you know it's a space where stories like this don't just get watched, they get felt. So this conversation holds a lot. It holds father wounds, it holds late discovery, it holds reunion, it holds perspective, and for Corey and me, it also holds a little doctor named Frankie fighting hard in a hospital. Here's Corey with filmmaker David Quent.

Corey 1:53

Hey David, welcome to the Family Twist Podcast.

SPEAKER_02 1:55

Oh, thanks for having me. Absolutely.

Corey 1:58

Full disclosure, and I don't know how much you know about our show, but Kendall and I talk about this semi-frequently, that we don't like to know too much going in. So we have not watched your documentary yet, though we plan to, who will say I watched the trailer today, and it's it's just it's been an emotional week for us. One of our dogs is in the hospital. So I'm like, I'm already crying during the trailer. I'm so glad. But I didn't watch the movie, yes. I completely understand.

SPEAKER_02 2:22

In fact, you saying that just it just got me. Yeah. Well, good. I'm glad that you haven't seen it yet, and it's fun to talk about it from that point of view. So that's great.

Corey 2:33

We're excited for the Untangling Our Roots summit coming up here shortly, and excited that you're going to be screening the film there. And I definitely want to hear about John Foberty, but we'll get to that a little bit later. Okay. But in the meantime, let's talk a little bit about your story and sort of the impetus for this documentary, which is obviously wildly different than the type of filmmaking you've been involved with in the past.

SPEAKER_02 2:58

That's exactly right. You know, I've worked in the film industry for 30 years in various capacities as a cinematographer and then as a director, and all of the sort of steps up the ladder. I got used to over the years working with a group of people. Maybe the crew was small, but maybe it was large. Maybe the budget was extensive for a production. Maybe the shooting schedule was weeks or months and clearly outlined. But what happened with regard to Father Unknown is not like any of those things. The impetus was not really, I think, to make a film. There wasn't a clear thought I had prior to this sequence of events happening that there certainly wasn't a thought, oh, I think I'll make a film about the orphanage my dad grew up in. And in fact, we'll go back there. I didn't have any thought like that. I think it was really motivated kind of from an unconscious place. I don't know about you guys, but that's happened to me at various points in my life where I find myself doing something, feeling compelled to do something, thinking that it's important or the right thing to do, but really not knowing why that is, but feeling strong conviction that I needed to do it.

Corey 4:23

So I think we could relate when we started this podcast, it's taken on a different form than what we intended. Originally, it was just going to be capturing Kendall's story for his historical posterity, you know, about his DNA surprise and life as an adopte D. But we quickly realized, like, okay, what there's something bigger here, and we want to hear and tell other people's stories and get this out there. We quickly became ingrained in the communities, which is great. Doing this podcast together has been life-changing for us in many ways.

SPEAKER_02 4:54

Yeah. That's great.

Corey 4:56

So talk to us a little bit about your father and growing up in an orphanage and what happened in his life.

The Letter, “You’re Not an Orphan” and the Flight to America Alone

SPEAKER_02 5:05

Well, I didn't really know much about his childhood. So, you know, the story really starts from me as a kid. You know, none of us we all sort of emerge not really knowing what's going on. We're born and we're trying to begin to put the pieces together. And I was probably five or six or seven, and I thought, you know, my dad seems different from these other dads. A lot of us have thoughts like that. There's plenty of ways people can be different and are different. But the things that were running through my head are like, I would ask him about his childhood, or maybe some sort of reference, or maybe he would even offer a little input as a dad, and he would say things like this. Well, I didn't have my own room. Mind you, I didn't know he grew up in an orphanage. This was not clearly articulated. So there would be just these little fragments that he would say, like, my bed was next to 25 other beds, and we all slept in one. Actually, the boy slept in one room and the girl slept in the other room. And you know, when you're really young, like I was, I'm like, was this summer camp? Yeah, what was going on? But he says Switzerland. Well, that's the other side of the world. So what how how did he get here? And you know, he would never really fill in the whole picture. And then, you know, I remember once in a while he would say, Well, when we got really hungry and there wasn't food, we would slaughter a pig in the courtyard and then eat it. And I was a little older, and I thought, okay, I'm pretty sure no other dad or drone up are saying that to their kids. That seems I don't know what to make of that. And then, you know, every once in a while when he would be referring to where he grew up, he would say, Well, at the castle, we did this. And I don't know if it would just be like, What here? The castle? No dads are talking about the castle where they grew up. I was very confused the whole time. And our relationship was not very close, really, for as long as I can remember. It was distant, and he was very strict and stern and had these expectations that felt to me like they were unlike other families. And so I grew up feeling kind of confused and disconnected. And, you know, my mother was there, of course, but she never intervened. I mean, she grew up in Chicago, so she was quote, American, but she never would come in after a little moment like that and say, you know, David, your dad grew up in an orphanage, and here's what happened, and you know, here's why he says those sorts of things, and so there was a lot of kind of silence around this. And so as time went on, I got a little older and I was like, Well, dad, how did you get to America? How did that happen? And he said, Well, one day when I was 12 years old, I was working out in the field, and I was like, You weren't in school? And he said, Oh, David, we didn't go to school. I mean, we had a little bit of instruction when there the work was done, but we, you know, we worked in the fields and did all of these sorts of things. And I said, Well, you were 12? And he said, Yeah, but I didn't know how old I was. And I was like, What? What do you mean? And he said, I never had a birthday. I never had a birthday. Nobody told me how old I was, so I didn't I didn't know where I was, I didn't know how old I was, I didn't know how long I had been there. He said, I actually thought that the headmaster of the orphanage was the parent of all of these children of all these boys and girls. And he said, I didn't know that people grew up with a mother and father, or one or both, and I didn't know people lived in a home versus a 700-year-old castle. I was just trying to assimilate all this stuff. Anyway, he said, one day, when I was 12, a letter came, and I got called into the headmaster's room, and he read this letter to me, and the letter said, Dear Urban, you're not an orphan, I'm your mother. And you're going to come to America and live with me now. My dad said, Well, where's a mother? And so the headmaster explained, America's on the other side of the world. And at twelve years old, I guess my dad was learning about the birds and the bees, in a sense, something that almost all of us just come to understand from growing up. They put him on an airplane. He'd never left this little area of Switzerland. He didn't speak any English, and he flew to the other side of the world by himself. His mother had said, I'll see you at the airport, and I'll be wearing a pink scarf. I just imagine my dad getting off this plane. He's in America now, and all of these people, I'm sure, dress completely differently, different culture, foreign language. He's looking for a woman in a pink scarf and somehow trying to conceptualize that this person is his mother, not totally knowing what a mother is. And so he was reunited with his mother in Philadelphia. He struggled, he was he missed home. And I remember him saying, I really missed, I was so homesick, and I was like, homesick for an orphanage.

Kendall 11:53

That's all you know, right?

SPEAKER_02 11:55

It was home, and you know, it was a a lush green place, and now he was still, you know, the inner city of Philadelphia, and it was concrete and loud and noisy, and English was the second language, and he was put in school and he struggled, and you know, he had a very difficult time adjusting. And so sometime after he was reclaimed by his mother, he said, Well, who is this man that was with us? And she said, Oh, that's your stepfather. And he said, What's a stepfather? And she explained that. And he said, Oh, well, then who is my real father? And I'm just using the language that he used because, in terms of his familiarity, you know, terms like late discovery adoptee or relinquished. He knew none of this. So, you know, real father, which has an offensive quality to it, he didn't know that. He just said, Well, who's my real father? And she said, Don't ever ask that question again. I will never tell you. And so he never did. And so he grew up, he continued to struggle, and he met my mother. They got married, and suddenly he was a dad, you know, a man in a family who was a father and a husband raising two kids, me and my sister. Fast forward until I was in my late 30s and struggling, and really never had any improvement in that relationship with him. I took my iPhone to their house one day, and I don't know why I did this, but I turned it on and I said, Dad, why do you think we never talk about the orphanage? Why do we never talk about that? And my mom was there too, and he said, Oh, you mean that's the place I had worms? And I was like, What? Yeah, worms. And then he described, you know, having a I think a parasite. Again, more of these really weird fragments that were disturbing, you know, that don't. He talked about being hungry and stealing food. And he said, Well, I don't know. And my mom said, David, I don't think there's anything to talk about. And I was like, There is everything to talk about. This doesn't make sense. Doesn't all that stuff feel weird to you? It feels strange to me, and no one is contextualizing it. But I left, I recorded that, you know, I went home, and I probably a month later I thought, I want to see if that orphanage is still there. So I found a website, this is long before Dubot Translate and ChatGPT. I found a website in German for this Schloss Bieberstein, which is what the orphanage was called, and it was still there. I sent an email in English and said, I know this is really weird. I live in the US. My dad says he grew up there. Do you have any records? Can you explain why he was there? Is there any information? What was this place? Why were children sent there? And I hit send. And I thought, I'm never gonna this is never gonna come back. But I was desperate. Three weeks went by and I had an email in an inbox, and it said, Dear Mr. Quint, we are no longer an orphanage, but we do have records from when this place was an orphanage, and I get emotional again. This story just it's so deeply impacting. We have records, and I went through the files that remain, and I found a list of children, and your dad's name is on it, and there was a photograph. And that is the first thing I saw from my father's childhood that was real. Meaning proof that we had been in this place. I mean, I never saw a photograph of him as a child. He just would say these things, these little fragments that seemed utterly ridiculous or implausible, or or who knew what. I was stunned and I said, I can't believe this. You know, what asked him a million questions, and you know, they responded and said, We're no longer an orphanage, but the castle is still here. And we wonder if your dad might know this man. There is a man that comes by once or twice a year. He lives in Switzerland, he's the same age as your dad. And maybe they knew each other and they sent me his name. He actually was on that same list. And so I called my dad and I said, Do you remember a kid named Sepp? And my dad said, I haven't talked about this story in a while, so it just it's so moving to me. And my dad said, I slept in the bed next to him. I totally remember him, and so I said, Dad, we we gotta go. We have to go there. And so it was at that point when I said, I don't know what's gonna happen, but I am recording every second that happens from the moment we get to the airport until we come home. And by the time it was over, I'll pause there.

Back in Switzerland, The Castle Is Real, and Everything Shifts

Corey 18:18

I well, we don't want you to share everything because we want to encourage people to watch the film as the story unfolds, but I can guess that there were definitely some discoveries once you arrived in Switzerland.

SPEAKER_02 18:32

Yeah.

Corey 18:33

What was that like being with your dad when those discoveries were?

SPEAKER_02 18:36

How can I we got to talk about all this stuff that we never talked about? I got to stand in the place and go, oh, it is a 700-year-old castle. You know, he wasn't making it up. Like I'm I'm there, I'm looking at it, and there's a courtyard, and there's a there's a river and a big stone wall, and you know, it's like it was like he became real in front of my eyes, and uh it wasn't just to see the things that he had uh kind of referenced, it was his emotion around being back in that place that he remembered so much from being there, and we were talking about it, and I was like, oh my gosh, he's a human being, he's a he he this makes sense to me. This feels like a more typical interaction between two human beings, and so it was incredible to just be there and share those memories with him. Sep, the kid who slept in the bed next to him, met us there. And next thing you know, those two are talking about how it would be for any of us. You go back to the place you grew up and see an old friend from when you were seven, eight, nine, and you're talking about shared memories, and I couldn't get a word in edgewise. I mean, I wasn't trying to, but uh speaking Swiss German, so I can kind of follow, but I never saw my dad have a conversation with anybody like that about his childhood or a friend from his childhood. So it was like a new person was emerging.

Kendall 20:46

Did he value it a lot, the experience?

The Answer to the Forbidden Question, and the Brother He Never Knew

SPEAKER_02 20:50

He did. I think at the time he was so in the moment of it that he really wasn't thinking about really what was happening. He was just you know, there's a scene in the film where we walk in the castle and they open a door down to the cellar of the castle, which is this big it's sort of like the dungeon. I mean, this is stuff that I imagined when I was a kid that he was talking about, and maybe not quite as dramatic as what I had imagined, but you know, down stone steps and you're in the basement of his castle. And he walks in there with Sep and the man who ran the sort of leadership of the castle presently. And the man said, We'll go any room you want to go in. We'll go you have free reign of this whole place. So take your time, walk through the whole thing. And that door opened, and he said, It still smells the same. It smells exactly the same. So I think for him to sort of reconnect th those pieces and be able to kind of validate that and really also to share that with someone else who was there was just huge just huge did you get an answer to the question as to why his mother said never ask me about this again yeah we did I'll say this I think we were there for ten days and by the time that trip was over we were standing on the doorstep of a brother my dad never knew we had you just watch it happen in front of you because that's the way it happened I don't want to take anything away from any reunion story they're all incredible and I find them all deeply moving regardless of how the pieces unfold but this the way this happened for my dad and I there was no forethought there was no planning there was no connection with this long lost family and then a month to think about it happened so fast that you are just experiencing it in real time and so it's really the experience was just totally gripping. I mean we were processing that for a long time after we came home because uh which I think is also normal for any story like that but it was so compressed that it was just incredible.

Kendall 23:41

Does the uh does answer the question of why your grandmother didn't also try to get your father's brother He is a half brother and yes it does answer that the whole thing is really revealed in front of you it happens from a point of view of really my dad.

SPEAKER_02 24:07

I I'm you know there would be no film and I probably wouldn't have happened if I hadn't been there but in a way it's really not my story. I didn't grow up in an orphanage. But on the other hand he wasn't compelled to go back and record this and try and get to the bottom of it.

Corey 24:25

So it's really this woven together what did this whole experience the trip and making the documentary do for the relationship with your dad?

SPEAKER_02 24:37

I completely changed it 100%. I understand my dad so much better it's important to me to not sell a fantasy and say oh you know we went on this trip or you know maybe like a rom-com genre where the two people get what they want and it's happily ever after but we're we're close in a way that is never happened before and we've stayed that way consistently well what an incredible I wouldn't trade that for the thing to go through together. It's hugely it was a hugely transformative experience and you know sharing the story sharing the film with other people and then talking about it has been a big big part of that because you know this weird bunch of fragments that I talked about at the beginning um that I was sure these never happened to anybody else and didn't make any sense and there I can't even explain all this stuff and no one will ever get it. Well guess what it turns out you guys know this I'm sure people totally get it and maybe it's not a 700 year old castle but it's something else and those fragments are you know the details are different but the themes are universal and so sharing our story and also hearing so many other stories was really powerful and meaningful.

Kendall 26:21

Drake I want to know about Sepp now I hope he's figured in the in the film.

SPEAKER_02 26:30

Yeah he he is you know Sepp ended up staying at the orphanage until he was 18 and became an adult and was I use the word paroled but that's not really you know when he was released. Aged out he aged out of the system yeah and of course you know by the time we met him he was a 68 year old man or somewhere in there. And so he had had a whole lifetime of putting together the pieces trying to fill in the context and sort of understand where they had been and what had happened and so for my dad to reunite with Sep and then to benefit from the all of the thinking that Sepp had done about it over the years was huge.

Corey 27:20

And there's a scene in the film where Sepp says I remember the day you got the letter and my dad said you do and he said oh yeah we all thought you were so lucky because you got to go to America and you were gonna get a family and my dad said I thought you all were the lucky ones because you got to stay here it's all perspective right yeah so totally David I don't know if growing up if your dad was a fan of Creedence Clearwater revival but that's so music is a has always been a really important part of Kendall's and my relationship I think are most of our first dates for live concerts including Jad Fogerdieek. Oh cool and like if when I hear a Credence song I think of my dad and one of the ways that we bonded with Kendall's birth father when we found him and he would stay over the night with us and one of the ways we would get him to calm down so we could go to bed was to listen to music together and so and Credence was one of his favorites. So having said that you know you were part of the film crew for John Fogerty's 50th anniversary concert at Red Rocks were you able to like experience that or was this like you're on the job are we able to like realize what cool stuff that's such a great question.

SPEAKER_02 28:50

Well I it's tricky to answer I I wasn't familiar with John's catalog in any meaningful way prior to that and so I wasn't going in with that context but it was very clear to me have you guys ever been to Red Rocks? No would love to see show of Red Rocks it's it is you can see an aft that you don't like at all. Pick one you are sure that you have no interest in I've shot many shows there and I've walked away saying that was really amazing and I don't even like that group or person or whatever. But it was very clear as soon as that show started that something special was happening and you can you know it's you're outside it's the summer you're close to all of it's a sort of intimate gathering of I don't know how many tens of thousands of people but you can feel it in that venue. So yeah really an amazing night that's awesome. But mostly really focused on you're really paying attention to the the details of what you're trying to capture for sure.

Corey 30:11

Well we'll definitely be thinking of you when we watch that concert.

SPEAKER_02 30:13

Yeah it's something else it's really really good.

Corey 30:17

So that sort of naturally leads to our traditional final question of the podcast going back to like how important music is to us. When you were growing up and having these struggles getting to know your father or when you were going through this process of making the movie, editing the movie, was there a song or an artist that you leaned on oh gosh I'm surprised that I that leaves me speechless because I love music so much.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

Music and films stories are just lifeblood for me. I don't think I have a good answer to that.

Corey 30:59

No worries I mean this is your dad's story. So it's not usually when we're asking people this question it's like when you were going through the fog and processing the trauma and I think that you know that helps spark you know people but you know I imagine it's probably going to be difficult to come up with a what were you listening to on the radio when you couldn't get your dad to say more than five or well it's funny it's it is funny.

SPEAKER_02 31:23

I did remember there's a moment that I know I shot on that trip that's not in the film but it's the two of us driving you know we had an old school GPS hanging off the rearview mirror. I'm driving in a I you know I don't know where I'm going. I'm just following the little purple line and you know my dad brought a number of things on the trip that I didn't know he had. And the reason I bring that up is it is one of the things he brought with him that he did not fully understand that he had saved from his mother's house after she died is the reason we end up on the doorstep of the brother's house. Well I didn't know that he had that in his backpack. And so we're driving you know at one point and there's a little more conversation starting to happen between us because I'm asking him well what does that sign say and he's like hey you want to listen to this and I'm like what's that he sticks it in the CD player and it was the Eagles greatest hits and I was like I didn't know I didn't know you were into those guys so I do remember we ended up talking about that. So that's I I think on the trip that's probably the best answer I have is uh distinctly remember that. Well good choice you can do much worse than that for sure.

Corey 32:52

I'll say the only reason and I was there with my uncle the only reason we left in the middle of the Eagles concert was because my brother's band was playing a concert at night and we had to get over to oh that's great. Well David I I apologize for being so emotional during this button don't apologize.

SPEAKER_02 33:10

I don't think I can make it through a screening of the film in fact I know I can't I have never done it and not been impacted and let's face it I know the story I know what's gonna happen I've experienced it it just gets me at certain points and I'm sure that is never gonna change so there's nothing to apologize for.

Kendall 33:32

Yeah I could tell my story every day I get emotional every time and it's because of what a wonderful impact it's had on life you know yeah I was editing an episode last night that it was just Kendall and the guest and I'm just like tears because you know because Kendall's getting emotional talking about his adoptive father you know it's just you know the feels never go away.

SPEAKER_02 33:55

Well it's interesting I remarried after the film and um my marriage at the time the film was making it was certainly part of the story struggles and relationships and I met my wife Kathy through screening the film oh and Kathy is an adoptee and a therapist who works with adoptees and whenever she tells her story to someone who asks I am gripped and swept away and you know completely different story set in Oklahoma and totally different details but it gets me every single time and I'm sure that won't change and if I heard any of those stories I don't have immunity to hear that because it's just so impactful and important.

Corey 34:47

Yeah I'm sure there's gonna be lots of boxes of tissues around at that mention in Atlanta.

SPEAKER_02 34:54

It's funny we you see early on that some of the producers and I talked about you know corporate sponsors relationships and somebody in a meeting said we should talk to Kleenex because it is every single time there's you know there's not a dry eye in the house. And I don't want to go off on a big tangent but orphan stories are so often at the root of superhero films. You know this archetype is frequently used to elicit quick sympathy and empathy from audiences and so you would think Kleenex would go geez like how how do you get something more compelling than that I'm not sure you do you know and it's a heck of a lot more interesting than I'm using a Kleenex because I have a cold for sure.

Corey 35:44

All right we'll put that under the universe I love it yeah that would be great well David thank you so much for coming on and being so open and candid. Looking forward to meeting you in person in March.

SPEAKER_02 35:56

Yeah that will be great I would love look forward to seeing you guys there and hopefully we can get a little chunk of time because I would love to hear that and it's great to not only hear the primary person's story but then when you have a family member significant other whatever that can sort of weigh in and be the color commentary on that I think it's even better. It's just m more rich and powerful there's something David said that keeps echoing for me.

Kendall 36:26

He talks about fragments the strange little pieces of story his dad would drop over the years the castle the worms the slaughtered pig the silence so many of us grow up with fragments things that don't quite make sense details that just don't fit feelings that have no explanation and sometimes it takes going back literally or emotionally to stand in the place where those fragments began. While we recorded this Frankie was still in surgery. Corey was trying to stay present but his heart was in that hospital room and when David talked about how returning to Switzerland changed his relationship with his father I could feel how much Corey wanted that kind of healing in every relationship he loves human or can Frankie's home now healing and we are too that episode reminds me that love is complicated identity is layered and sometimes you just don't know what you're missing until you go back and look for it. If you're heading to the Entangling Our Roots conference make sure you see Father unknown ring tissues apparently we're working on the Kleenex sponsorship and if you're in the middle of your own fragments your own unanswered questions your own complicated relationship with a parent know this. You are not alone there are more of us than you think. Family secrets are the ultimate plot twist. We'll see you next time