Reverse Jackass

Ep34: Evelyn hosts a cross-border pronunciation quiz; Nick derails it with “funky butt loving.”

Episode 34

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0:00 | 22:20

Evelyn and Nick open with a “redemption episode” after a lost-to-the-vault recording session, and immediately decide the healthiest possible reset is… publicly daring each other to apologize via email. It’s petty. It’s theatrical. It’s Reverse Jackass.

Then Evelyn brings a podcast idea suggested by their mutual friend Alyse (SHOUTOUT TO ALYSE)  and puts Nick on the spot with a delicately curated list of words. Nick, naturally, responds with equal parts linguistic smugness and chaos energy, and somehow we end up with the phrase “funky butt loving” entering the chat like a fresh-out-of-hibernation brown bear staggering into an Erewhon.

In conclusion: we may not pronounce things the same, but we do share a sacred cultural value… arguing confidently about pronunciation while being completely unqualified to do so. And confident arguing is the foundation of, not only Nick and Evelyn's friendship, but also of the Reverse Jackass podcast.

TEXT US!...and we'll respond, because that's the kind of people we are.

=============

Want to get in touch with Nick & Evelyn? 

Email them at reversejackass@gmail.com

SPEAKER_00

It's reverse J.

SPEAKER_01

Should I lead us in? I really wish you would. Folks, welcome back to the reverse Jackass Podcast. With me, sorry. Start again. Yep. Hello, folks. Welcome back to the Reverse Jackass Podcast. I'm Nick. With me as always is Evelyn, the Canadian Blade. Evelyn, say hello. Okay, so this is uh redemption episode.

SPEAKER_00

Redemption. Redemption song.

SPEAKER_01

Evelyn and I had a fight earlier today. We we we recorded the episode and we had a fight so catastrophic.

SPEAKER_00

It was our first fight.

SPEAKER_01

So horrific. Yeah, I didn't know people could bleed during Zoom conversations, but there we were at the end of it, both bleeding real blood. It was it was dehumanizing. Yep. It was cruel. It was no holds barred. And I just want to say, first off, Evelyn, I accept your apology when you're ready to give it.

SPEAKER_00

When I'm ready to give it, then I'm glad that it will be accepted. Because as of right now, we are not talking. And I desperately wish there was a third person in the room so I could relay my messages to you through them.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. So if you're out there, I want you to email reversejackass at gmail.com and tell Evelyn that I am ready for her apology whenever she would decide to tender it to me, whether it is by the end of this podcast, whether it's directly after this podcast, but also publicly, or whether it's in some other loud, um, publicly visible way, in the next 24 hours, I will be ready to accept that from you.

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And please, please email me first at Canadianblade6969 at gmail.com before you send it to reversejackass at gmail.com so I can intercept that email before Nick gets to it.

SPEAKER_01

There you go, folks.

SPEAKER_00

We're both punchy today, so this episode should be good. We're a little punchy and okay.

SPEAKER_01

It's an Evelyn episode.

SPEAKER_00

It's an Evelyn episode, and this is not my original idea. This idea for this episode came from a mutual friend we have named Shame. Name self-loathing. Oh, my old friend. Hello, lover. From Elise, our friend. Elise. And Elise wanted us to talk about how we say things differently as Americans and Canadians.

SPEAKER_01

Love it.

SPEAKER_00

Um, and I love it because you said something a few weeks ago when we were in a call. You said to me, Do you think I have an American accent? And I like I kind of waffled around with the answer, I believe. Because sure did. But I didn't really, I don't really think of it. I don't hear you speak. I don't think, wow, like Nick really sounds like an American. But then, but then the other side of that question is you said, Do you think we sound the same when we talk? And I said, Yes. And I said, Don't you? And you said, Oh no. So correct. You think I have an accent, which I know you have an accent, which is so funny to me. That's so, so, so funny. So you know I have an accent. And two things can be true at the same time, right? Like you know that I have an accent, and I know that I don't.

SPEAKER_01

Not these, these two things can't be true at the same time. Other other things, other things do face a certain duality, but this is an instance where I'm correct.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and I'm and I'm the editor of this podcast.

SPEAKER_01

So I better be careful or she's gonna cut my words out of this episode.

SPEAKER_00

Out, or I'm gonna, I'm gonna cut all the important words out of this conversation. I just I wish you could hear how good that sounds. It's so close to the same physical movement I make when I vomit. Like a wide mouth, just an unhinged jaw, like a snake eating a full-grown capibera.

SPEAKER_01

Like that's so even in vomiting, there's no dignity for you.

SPEAKER_00

No, is there for anybody?

SPEAKER_01

Is that true? That's a fit.

SPEAKER_00

Pinkies, pinkies out, everyone. We're pukins. Gross. Okay, so I have I have um written down a list of words that I know you can't see on my workbook, but I've written down a list of words, and it's almost like because Nick and I, as he alluded, we've had a we've had a a quibble, and our we did record an episode that shall never be aired.

SPEAKER_01

Maybe we should put it behind a paywall just to see if anyone to make people pay for our least funny episodes.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think that's what we should do. But I did write this list of words out. It's almost like I knew that episode wasn't gonna fly, and I needed something. Like my subconscious was like, what if you just wrote some words? What if you wrote some words down, Ev? And and lo and behold, here we are. So I'm going to write down a word. This is how it's gonna work. The audience, obviously, the listening audience can't see these words, but I'm guessing that between the way you say it and the way I say it, people will be able to figure out what this word is.

SPEAKER_01

One hopes.

SPEAKER_00

All right. First word. Maybe the most, the the easiest word that we could start with. Out. Out. Oh. Okay, you say it again. Out. Did did you hit your thumb with a hammer? Because that's sounds like OW.

SPEAKER_01

Well, if I said I'm gonna go out, then you might have to do a little bit of decoding as to whether I told you I was going out, or whether I had a sentence, got halfway through it, and then harmed myself by accident. But I like to think that Americans, masters of context that we are, are able to uh yeah, even I hear my the bullshit on what I'm saying. But uh I applaud you for taking extra special care of that T.

SPEAKER_00

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01

And I don't mind that, but I might say to you, like, is it spelled O A T or O-U-T?

SPEAKER_00

No, because oats are what you eat.

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00

Going out is what you do. Out. I don't know, man. You know what's really what's really funny because you yes, I say the T at the end, but Canadians drop consonants all the time. All the time. Not the T's. Canadians hit those T's. Not no. Well, is that a golfing? Like, are we good golfers? I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

Like Canadians are historically poor golfers.

SPEAKER_00

But like things like, okay, I wrote down these words. Oh, like uh Toronto.

SPEAKER_01

Toronto, yeah. Right? Toronto. I think you hit the T's at the end of the words. I think those are the ones that you all are really meticulous about. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I've noticed is that uh Israeli people do this too. Or Israeli people really take care of that T at the end of the word. That's it, that's the part of that accent too. Maybe it's time to speak out.

SPEAKER_00

Maybe it's time to speak out. Okay, here's here's another one. These we're starting with the easy ones here. Sorry. Sorry. Ooh, I really heard it there. Did you? Yeah, say it again. Sorry. Sorry. Wow. Yeah. But to me, you're saying S-A-R-R-Y. Sorry. No. Oh.

SPEAKER_01

To me, to you, I'm saying S-A-R-I. Sorry.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, like a sorry. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. Um, but in fact, I'm actually saying the correct word. But you're saying to me, you're saying S-O-R-E-Y, like I'm sore.

SPEAKER_00

Uh, well, that's because I I hit my thumb with a hammer out. That's what I did.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. I'm I'm sorry that happened to you.

SPEAKER_00

I'm sorry that this is the last episode of Reverse Jackass will be putting out. You just can't hear how good you sound with that American accent. I'm not gonna sleep tonight. What about this word? How would you say this word? Foyer. Say it again. Foyer. Foyer?

SPEAKER_01

Foyer, yeah. Foyer. We we would say foyer. In a s in a country where they speak French? Yeah. Foyer, foyer. I mean, it's a French word, is it not? Foyer, yeah. Foyer, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Ooh, do we say foyer? I don't know what we say now. This, ooh, is this a side effect of this episode?

SPEAKER_01

Am I not gonna know what side of the board is? I mean, I've heard people say foyer, but like if you're asking what if you're asking what discerning people say, it's foyer.

SPEAKER_00

Well, I'm no, no, we're not we're not playing the class game here. We're not we're not playing the we're not playing the play.

SPEAKER_01

Do you know who doesn't like to play the class game, Evelyn? And I'm just gonna be real with you. Low class people.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I wasn't saying Pierre Poliet. But he acting like Pierre Polyaf.

SPEAKER_01

Fuck that guy.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I hate that guy.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, get ready, listeners. You're gonna not you're gonna get with me, but you're not gonna like what Evelyn has to say on this. This one's pronounced pasta. No, it's pasta. Pasta? Pasta. That's fucking crazy.

SPEAKER_00

Like pass. Pass pa.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

What am I gonna- I uh you know what? In this one, I agree with you. I think it sounds way better. Pasta.

SPEAKER_01

Well, and pasta is an Italian word, and pasta, pasta is how they would pronounce it.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, they wouldn't say pasta. Thank you so much for telling me where that word is from.

SPEAKER_01

I never ever would have I wouldn't have guessed it if you had Would you Well, based on your pron pronunciation, it's really expectable that you didn't know where that word came from. Next word. I can't wait to try your lasagni. Lysagna Lisagna. Really? We're gonna have a thing on this?

SPEAKER_00

Okay, this one's pronounced presentation. No, you don't say it like that though. Don't tell me you do. Presentation? No, you say it presentation. I have Have I said that? I have never in my whole time knowing you ever heard you say presentation. I say presentation? Like religiously. Wait, horrible. Horrifying. Well, I thought so too, but then I just thought that that's just like I thought that's how Americans say it. Now, are you trying to maybe I should be saying the words first? So you literally didn't know you say it presentation. I didn't, and now I want there to be a swear jar. I'm gonna start putting a buck in the jar every time I say that. That's horrifying. That wow, I was convinced we say them differently. But it is present, yeah, presentation. Presentation. Okay, good. I'm sorry, is this like an intervention? It might be.

SPEAKER_01

It might be. Listen, that's that's something I want to know. If I'm if I'm pronouncing things in a weird way, that's something I want to know about. Uh-oh, here we go. Okay, what's about what about this one?

SPEAKER_00

Oh, hockey. Say it again. Hockey. Hockey. Do we sound the same? Yes, I think so. What do you hear? Hockey. Hockey. Your mouth looks your mouth looks like it's saying the word the letter A, though. Hockey. Hockey. Hockey. Hockey. But you know what? I think you and I say A is different.

SPEAKER_01

That just what it comes down to. That could be. Another thing, difference that you and I have is that as Evelyn, I want you all to know that as Evelyn is doing this, she's making a big show out of crossing out the word we've already done. Like I couldn't possibly go, oh hockey, we just said that one. I should say the one beneath it. She's like, I'm not getting tripped up on this show. That's how you know she has to edit everything, is that she's like, she's like taking great pains to make sure that I don't get us stuck.

SPEAKER_00

Who says I'm doing this for you? Okay.

SPEAKER_01

It's nine o'clock.

SPEAKER_00

It's nine o'clock.

SPEAKER_01

Oh burn. No. No kidding. The next word is mom. Mom. Oh, I don't like that.

SPEAKER_00

So you're saying you're saying M-A-H-M. Mom.

SPEAKER_01

Mom. M-O-M. Mom. And I'm saying mom. M-U-M.

SPEAKER_00

Mom.

unknown

Mom.

SPEAKER_01

Mom. You say mom.

SPEAKER_00

Mom.

SPEAKER_01

You don't ever say mom. You say mom. Oh, and then I talk to the mom and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's that one. I'm ready to. I talk to the mom. Yeah, I do. I talk mom. That seems like a Canadian thing. Mom.

SPEAKER_00

I think it is a Canadian thing. But I also do think people say like mom. Mom.

SPEAKER_01

Well, introduce me to those people.

SPEAKER_00

It's my mom. Well, when I meet them, I just crossed it out, just in case you're wondering. Here, you can hear it. Let me hold this. It's a little ASMR. See, can you imagine?

SPEAKER_01

Can you imagine just being on the on the street corner of like the toughest Canadian city, which is, is it Windsor or is it Regina? Like, what's the toughest? You said, I think you said Winnipeg's. Winnipeg is tough.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, so imagine, let's imagine you're in you're on the toughest street corner in Winnipeg, and it's like cold outside and shitty and it's menacing, and there's street toughs all around you, and one of them looks at you and goes, Yeah, I f your mum. M o like mum. I'm gonna kick that guy's ass. I'm not as scared of anybody that's gonna say mum. Mum mum. But what if you're on like the the back streets of Liverpool? I'll knock, I'll knock that guy out.

SPEAKER_00

Ow. I'll knock him out.

SPEAKER_01

I'll knock him out. What about this word? Direction.

SPEAKER_00

Direction. Are you just speaking words randomly? Direction. No, I wondered if you'd say direction.

SPEAKER_01

No, because I'm because again, I don't want to be this guy, but I'm kind of a high-class person.

SPEAKER_00

Well, okay, until this comes out.

SPEAKER_01

This one I think I'm gonna say, and I'm gonna say that I think you guys have the right thing on this, which is that's Z. That's the letter Z. Mm-hmm. Is that another alphabet? Oh and I know that you all are gonna say Z, and frankly, given that Z sounds so much like eight other letters when you say it over the phone, I think Zed is the right way to go. So I'm gonna concede that one to you all. But what is the what is the if I asked you to name one animal whose name started with a Zed, who what would you say?

SPEAKER_00

I'd say Zebra.

SPEAKER_01

I don't like that.

SPEAKER_00

We had this conversation when we were filming your course. Do you remember that? I probably no you don't. I don't I must have chased it out of my mind. I should I should stop asking you. Do you remember that? Because I mean that was that was a year ago. So that's I mean it's lost.

SPEAKER_01

It's a zebra, it's a zebra.

SPEAKER_00

It's a zebra. I agree, it's a zebra.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, then why did you say zebra? Like you don't respect it. I I don't respect the zebra.

SPEAKER_00

What is that d what has it done to earn my respect?

SPEAKER_01

Wow. See, some of us on my side of the border believe that respect is that we're entitled to respect, all of us.

SPEAKER_00

You know what? I think in 12 minutes of filming or 18 minutes, that's probably the first thing we can both come to comic crowd on. Okay, this word, this word's, this word's gonna launch you. Okay, okay. You don't even know. I wonder if you know how we say it. This is this is I'm really curious about this.

SPEAKER_01

I know how we say it. I have an idea of how you say it. We say lieutenant. Okay. How do you say that y'all say lieutenant? We say left tenant, yeah. Wow. Tell me why that's okay. Left tell me what part of that gives you, tell me what part of that spelling gives you the right to say left tenant.

SPEAKER_00

Here's what I want. Here's what I want. Because I don't actually know the answer to this, if I'm being honest. But I want our friend Tim, by our friend, I mean my friend, Tim, to write write to us at reversejackass at gmail.com. And I want you to write to Nick and say, Dear Nick, here is why we say, why we say the word that's spelled lieutenant as lieutenant.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, like it's clearly uh of French origin. Right. And you and I both speak French, so if we were pronouncing it with a French accent, it would be Lutenon. Yeah. Which is again, there's no F there. That's just that's irresponsible. I know.

SPEAKER_00

I know. I'm not I'm look, I didn't come here to argue about what's responsible or not. Didn't you? This nothing about this podcast is responsible. A year ago, when you were like, Evelyn, I need more fun in my life. Let's start a podcast.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I said, you should be my fun lieutenant.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I said and you said, I don't know. I've asked everyone, my mom, I've asked everyone. What more can I do?

SPEAKER_01

They need to go in a new direction.

SPEAKER_00

I even went so far as making a presentation that I could from from R to Z. From R to Z. Oh man. Do I have anything more? Oh, okay. Here's something fun about now. I want to know if this is if it this is American as well. Canadians, I wrote this down so I wouldn't forget. We use different pronunciations of words based on whether it's a noun or a verb. Okay. So the word okay, so this word. Process. Process.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_00

Does it ever change the pronunciation? Like, do you ever say process?

SPEAKER_01

I I've heard process. Yes. And I would but I would also say I I could hear somebody saying it as a noun or verb, like that's not my process, or I need to process these feelings. Like I hear you, and I think there's times where having a little a little bit of difference between the noun and the verb makes sense. Yeah. But that one when I'm saying process, I I think probably all the time.

SPEAKER_00

Process, you're saying process. I'm thinking, like, what did I write down here? We would say process information.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

And then processing.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

But then we would say, like, I created, I helped develop a new process at work.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And you would say both those things with no shame.

SPEAKER_00

I would say none of those things with shame. And in fact, I would probably see where I could work in the word lieutenant there as well. Just to okay, what about this?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, uh, writing versus writing. I think those sound very similar. And I I given that you all are such careful stewards of the letter T or Ted, as you might say, uh, I I would understand if you were like, it's writing versus riding. But writing, writing, I was writing in a book, I was riding a horse. The letter Ted might be that might writing in a book, I was I was writing in a book, I was um riding someone's mom's face.

SPEAKER_00

Oh first of all. That really, really caught me off guard. I'm gonna have to call the lieutenant general when I've done this.

SPEAKER_01

This is how you know I respect you, is that any other co-host of this podcast, I would have, I would have said their mother. But I left your family out of it and I made a hypothetical family up so that I could commit that crime.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I would say writing, actually, I would say writing, like a like a D sound. I wouldn't say writing.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, really? Okay.

SPEAKER_00

I would say like um it's worth writing it down.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

Worth writing it down, but then I was riding a horse.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

Riding versus writing.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

There's a Y sound in the writing. This is super fun. Everyone's loving that, listening to this. They love us.

SPEAKER_01

We're just we're just spinning straw into gold here.

SPEAKER_00

So tell me what words, like, I mean, I these are just the ones I thought of, but what do I say? Can you think of anything I say or other Canadians say that really sticks out to you?

SPEAKER_01

Okay. Well, here's I'm gonna write something down here. I'm gonna see how you pronounce this.

SPEAKER_00

Okay. I'm terrified, just so you know. No, no, no. I've had control up to this point. Oh, okay. Isn't that the last line in the Star Spangled Banner?

SPEAKER_01

Uh, I don't think I love you, Dad, is the last line in the Star Spangled Banner. No, I don't think so. But it's interesting how hard this is for you to say.

SPEAKER_00

You're really uh really stalling. Well, I yeah, because I I want to make sure I say it properly. Oh, you know what? No, where I where have I seen that before? I've seen that on the American crest.

SPEAKER_01

I love you, dad is on the American crest. There's a big sign.

SPEAKER_00

As soon as you drive into the States from Canada, there's a big billboard with those three words on it. Just so everyone knows, um, Nick wrote Kiss My Ass on a piece of paper.

SPEAKER_01

I wrote I Love You Dad, and we can produce the video for it. Here's another one. This is a famous movie catchphrase. I'd be curious to know how you pronounce this.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, um, how would I say that? Funky butt loving. This is the this is the episode where Nick turns into a 12-year-old boy and makes Evelyn say fun, weird things.

SPEAKER_01

I got news for you. I've been a 12-year-old boy for 34 years.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

That is a actually a popular movie catchphrase. I don't know if you know that. Are you funky butt loving? No. Yes. So this is true, and anyone approximately my age in the States will remember this. There was a movie when I was a kid called Rookie of the Year. And I don't know how they made this movie. Did you see the movie? No, but I know what movie you're talking about. Okay. So this this joke was in the movie itself is forgettable and kind of stupid, but the but this joke was in the movie, which is crazy, and it was in all of the all of the previews for the movie, which is that the kid is at the doctor with his broken arm, the doctor takes the cast off, and the kid's arm flashes forward and hits the doctor in the nose, and the doctor goes, ah, funky butt loving. And then the one of the kids, one of his friends who's inexplicably in his doctor's appointment with him, goes, Did he just say funky butt loving? And like that was in all of the ads. And I don't know how that's in a kid's movie or the ads for a kid's movie. But for years since, anybody born within four years of me knows funky butt loving. Because also, that's not something people say, except doctors, apparently.

SPEAKER_00

Well, I had a doctor's appointment today, and that was the first thing after checking my blood pressure. That was the first thing he said. It was cathartic. Oh, yeah. Like, I don't know what else he would use, what other term he would use to describe perfect textbook blood pressure. Perfect blood pressure, numerically perfect blood pressure. Yes, yes. I don't know. So I feel like we've covered a lot of ground today.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I feel like uh I feel like on some level our countries drew further apart today, but I also felt like we drew some lines between what linguistically is appropriate and not appropriate. Um, and I hope that you were taking notes. I hope that you were riding down.

SPEAKER_00

I hope that I hope that when we're done this presentation, that you can go ri riding, riding out into your foyer and riding out into your foyer in the right direction.

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00

And that you will get on the telephone and immediately call your mom and tell her about this entire pro tell her about this entire process.

SPEAKER_01

I I sure will. And my mom, as a as an enthusiastic guardian of the English language, will no doubt understand where I'm coming from. This brings us to the end of our podcast. Folks, send us your send us your pronunciation guides and your funky butt loving to uh reverse jackass at gmail.com. But otherwise, uh, you know, you know, be nice to people. Be nice to people, even when they're cruel to your language. I'm Nick, and we love you. Evelyn, say goodbye to the people.

SPEAKER_00

I don't want to.

SPEAKER_01

I don't want to. I'm petty. Deal with it, dickheads, says Evelyn. And we'll see you next time on reverse jackass.

SPEAKER_00

Some neighbors are besties, others quarrel bitterly.

SPEAKER_01

Stuck together through geography. One of us has nukes, and the other has tokes.

SPEAKER_00

It's American Canadian diplomacy. It's reverse.

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