"Married Shmaried" | Falling for a Married Woman, Coming Out & Our Rocky Beginning

In this episode, we’re finally telling the full story of how we got together—and spoiler alert: it was messy. What started as a friendship through a summer job turned into flirting, late-night conversations, complicated feelings, and a relationship that definitely didn’t take the easy road.

We take you back to 2006 and 2007, when we first met working at summer camp, became friends, and eventually found ourselves developing feelings for each other under less-than-ideal circumstances. We talk honestly about navigating attraction, coming out, marriage, divorce, guilt, heartbreak, and all the bad decisions we made along the way. If you've ever looked back at your younger self and thought, "What the hell was I doing?" this episode will probably feel familiar.

We also dive into the reality of ending a long-term relationship, grieving a marriage even when you know it's the right decision, and the complicated emotions that come with discovering your identity later than expected. From awkward first dates and emotional conversations to breakups, moving away, and questioning everything, this is the beginning of a love story that almost didn't survive its first chapter.

This episode is part one of our relationship origin story—a raw, honest look at how two very imperfect people somehow found their way to each other. There are plenty of laughs, a little cringe, and more than a few moments where we wonder how we're still together nearly twenty years later.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. Home - Julie Beck LLC

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:05

I'm Ryan. I'm Julie. And this is the stories we leave you.

SPEAKER_02 0:11

Welcome back. Today we are talking about our origin story. Origin? The Ryan Julie origin story. It's gonna be a bumpy ride, guys. It was bumpy when it happened. But somehow we're here.

SPEAKER_03 0:28

I didn't buy tickets to this roller coaster again. Alright, so I know we've touched on this a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 0:34

Yeah, we briefly covered it in one of our first episodes.

SPEAKER_03 0:37

But clearly people know we're together.

SPEAKER_02 0:39

Yeah. Today we're just going a little more in depth about the ups and downs and honestly, it is kind of amazing that we're still together. I'm offended. Well But me too. I mean, whenever you do things to annoy me, it it's always amazing that we're still together. Wow. But you can put all this on me.

SPEAKER_03 1:01

For our rocky timeline. I already have my there should be an asterisk next to the things that are Julie's fault. Oh my gosh. Okay. Was that in the microphone enough? I'm gonna say you're a bad person a lot on this episode. I'm just sorry. That's okay. Anyway. I I was kind of a bad person. Alright, so holy shit, let's take it back literally 20 years.

SPEAKER_02 1:24

Oh my gosh. It yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:25

Like legit 20 years. God, we're old. Because we met in the summer of 2006 doing the YMCA summer camp. Which we've touched on before.

SPEAKER_02 1:36

Which is so weird that our 20th anniversary, our kid is in the YMCA summer camp for the first time.

unknown 1:42

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 1:42

Whoa. Wow. Fucking old. Anyways, 2006, we meet, we're friends, nothing super special.

SPEAKER_02 1:49

Yeah. We worked together. We ended up at the same location. We became friends, but it wasn't like not friends enough that we hung out outside of work. And we did not stay in touch at all. We went to the same college, but we didn't see each other.

SPEAKER_03 2:04

Like, oh my gosh, we're such good friends. Like, let's hang out.

SPEAKER_02 2:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:07

That didn't happen until the following summer. So Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:10

So we ended up together again the next summer, same seven. Different location, but we were at the same location again. Like together again.

SPEAKER_03 2:19

And by complete random luck. Mm-hmm. Slash fate.

SPEAKER_02 2:24

Yeah. Yeah. We ended up there together again. And I feel like it was kind of like the first time. Like we hit it off.

SPEAKER_03 2:31

Well, I think it was nice because I remember saying, Oh, hey, I know you. And like we just kinda hit it off. And I think we both kind of felt more comfortable because we knew each other. And it's like, oh, okay. I'm not with a whole bunch of strangers and whatnot. But yeah, that was a fun summer. It was a very eventful six months between summer and the end of the year because we were graduating. That was on the calendar. So it was our last semester of college with us.

SPEAKER_02 3:01

So we were friends during the summer. Towards the end of summer. This was when we started to like want to hang out outside of work. And we'd already had like our conversations, like more in-depth conversations, become deeper friends. I knew you were a lesbian at this point. We'd had the conversation. Like I remember your aunt was sick and Yeah. You had told me about your dad. Yeah. I don't remember exactly how everything went down. I just remember just so fast. Like things got kind of flirty.

SPEAKER_03 3:32

Maybe it was just my side, but I mean, I was always flirty with my friends by nature. So it was probably on both ends, but I never thought you would be interested at all.

SPEAKER_02 3:44

Yeah, well, I was married too. Why would you?

SPEAKER_03 3:47

I don't know. So when when the flirting became a little bit more aggressive, I was like, what is happening? Because I mean, who doesn't like that kind of attention? But also it's like, ew, you're married. Like, I don't know, like what is happening?

SPEAKER_02 4:01

Before the night that it all went down, did you have any indication of besides like, okay, maybe I was a little flirty, but me liking you? Had that that crossed your mind?

SPEAKER_03 4:15

Um, I think when you when we were like laying there and you said you had to tell me something and that you liked me. So that night. Well, no. It was I acted all shocked and freaked out, but let's keep in mind I had never been in a relationship. So I never had anyone tell me that they liked me, let alone like wanted to be anything more than friends or whatever. I liked people, but I never told them because they were usually like my friends. So it was it was one of those things where it was like, oh my god, you would have to literally be like blind to the fact that you were flirting more than you should. Because when we ate at Red Robin that one time where we felt like it was like our unofficial first date, yeah, the fact that it felt like a date and we both it was like I'm not crazy, right? If you didn't like me that way and you were flirting like that, like you need to tone that shit down as a married woman. But it was like, okay, I just wanted to hear you say it because I wasn't gonna say it first, yeah, because I still thought it was inappropriate and disrespectful because you were married, but also I had never told anyone I liked them. So in that situation, I freaked out because I was like, holy shit, someone actually like likes me. Like, what the fuck? You're married. But yes, I had reason to believe. I mean, it wasn't super shocking, but like for you to say it out loud like that, I'm like, I mean, you weren't hiding it very well at all.

SPEAKER_02 5:49

Realistically, I mean I mean, we just talked about this on the last episode. When I want something, I'm gonna go after it. So Yeah. You were the target. No, but it wasn't even for me. It was like, I think it was kind of fun because it's like, oh, I've never had feelings like this before. Like, just for anyone listening who might have gone to high school with me, or even the girls that we kissed because we were doing it for the guys. No, I didn't kiss you because I was a lesbian. No, I didn't like it. No, I didn't have any fantasies about you. Kissed in high school to show off the boys. Okay, so that might be a conversation for another day.

SPEAKER_03 6:30

Me knowing that I was Kinzie Six gay, I kissed a lot of boys. Not I mean not a lot, but that's all that I kissed. And I mean, kissing's fun. Lips are lips. Like I said, I didn't really want to like have sex with them.

SPEAKER_02 6:45

Yeah, I like making out, so yeah. So it was I'd never kissed anyone or had an attraction. Like, oh, maybe I'm a lesbian. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:55

It was not once in my life. Oh, this is fun. We're being stupid.

SPEAKER_02 6:58

Exactly. Not once in my life had I been attracted.

SPEAKER_03 7:01

So back on track.

SPEAKER_02 7:02

Yeah. So flirting with you was fun, and it was like, oh, I like this person. And you know, at first it was probably just the excitement of liking someone new and it being something different. So we went out, went to Martha's, which is a gay club. It was the place to be in Springfield, Missouri back in the day for the gay people. And yeah, I remember it was us and a couple other people. You know, we drank, we danced, had a good time, and then I went back to your place and was staying the night because I lived almost an hour away and didn't want to drive all the way home. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And that was the night. That's when nothing happened, by the way. Nothing happened, but I was in your bed and I think I had taken off my pants and I had on like You said you were hot. Lacy panties.

SPEAKER_03 7:53

And they were black. I remember that. And I just remember you didn't have pants on. And I got another blanket and you got all offended.

SPEAKER_02 8:01

Yeah, I was like, what? We can't share a blanket? Weird. But yeah, nothing happened that night because I feel like you were like ah well, it was like threefold why nothing happened.

SPEAKER_03 8:13

More importantly, you were married. Mary Sh Mary. Secondly, I had never kissed a girl, so that was new. And maybe it's just twofold. That's it just twofold. I mean, it was new territory completely. Like no s no serious relationship, nobody ever was interested. And on top of all of that, you were married. So I mean it was it was a lot. Yeah. I mean, I I'm not positive anything would have happened even if you weren't married, because in that situation, I get really shy.

SPEAKER_02 8:48

Anyway, that's kind of how it all started. And then from there we hung out more. It was us and our friend. And we would go out every once in a while. I might stay the night. Yeah, you came and hung out at my place a couple of times. Stayed the night once.

SPEAKER_03 9:07

I think we were someone else.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

We were going floating or something. Yeah. So you came and stayed.

SPEAKER_03 9:12

You're like, you might as well stay out here because it's closer. Yeah. So that's before you told me too.

SPEAKER_02 9:16

Yeah. So it was like all of this was kind of like growing and developing while yes, I was still married. And I remember even telling you at one point, I'm not getting divorced. So it was kind of like, I want to have this relationship with you. Like I wanna keep exploring this, but I can't get divorced. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 9:38

What would I do?

SPEAKER_02 9:39

Yeah, because literally, like he was my high school sweetheart. He was all I had ever known. But you couldn't see an alternative, yes. Like a a way out. Yeah. But there was also a huge history there. Right. That like I was not truly happy in that marriage either. No, I know.

SPEAKER_03 9:58

You were putting that on the back burner while you were enjoying other things.

SPEAKER_02 10:02

Yeah. Well, it was kind of like one of those, you wanna you're in the marriage, you wanna make it work, but at the same time, like I was also kind of checked out because just and being drawn in a different history with him, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:14

Because if it wasn't me, it would have been someone else. Exactly. Yeah. Where your headspace was.

SPEAKER_02 10:19

Yeah, and I truly believe that because I think things only would have gotten worse in my marriage with him. Now, I am not at all saying what I did was right or the right way to handle it, but being You're saying you were a bad person, right, in this moment?

unknown 10:36

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02 10:36

Yes, I was. If you asked my therapist, she would say I'm not a bad person, probably.

SPEAKER_03 10:41

But you just made really bad choices, and I'm fine with me being your bad choice.

SPEAKER_02 10:45

Yes, I did make bad choices.

SPEAKER_03 10:46

Not with other people.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

But yeah, so things started out on a rocky road from the beginning. At some point, I was like, no, I need to leave him. Because I think I always knew that was probably what was gonna happen. I just hadn't accepted it yet.

SPEAKER_03 11:03

I mean, just to give a quick like rundown of how quickly this roller coaster went up and down and up and back down again, like started in the summer. Our unofficial get together was in September, early September.

SPEAKER_02 11:20

Which our official get together we count as the night that we went out, and I was mad at you for not sharing a blanket with me.

SPEAKER_03 11:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:27

So nothing really happened.

SPEAKER_03 11:29

September we get together late October. I quote unquote broke it off with you slash broke up with you on the birthday of your ex-husband, now ex-husband, which I didn't know. And we joke because you ate like a whole box of fat cakes, yeah. Oatmeal cream pies or Star Crunch, something like that. Basically, I was texting you and I was like, I can't, it's not fair to me. You need to figure out your shit. This is getting to be too complicated. I don't know if before or after that. I think we had started to really develop some feelings at this point. Yes. That must have been because we had a conversation in person where I said, you need to figure your shit out because I think I'm falling in love with you. Yeah. And I want to be with you. And so I told you, like, you need to figure this out, whatever. And ended up being his birthday, which I didn't know. You were all sad. And then we when did he show up to my apartment? Because that was a fun day.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

I have no idea. I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 12:36

Well, it's kind of irrelevant, but yeah, that was an interesting day.

SPEAKER_02 12:39

I remember I was sleeping. I think I was in your bed. You had gone to class. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:43

And I came back with plans, and he was in the parking lot, and I was like, oh god, I can't just get back in my car and leave. He already saw me. I may die right now, or you know what? Fuck it, I'm just gonna go inside, and he gets out. Luckily, he's by himself, and he just said, I need to talk to my wife. And I was like, Okay, sure.

SPEAKER_02 13:07

I remember you came in and you were like, You need to get up, you need to get up, your husband's here. And I was like, What?

SPEAKER_03 13:14

Yeah, that was fun.

SPEAKER_02 13:15

Yeah. So I went out and had a conversation in the car with him. But by Christmas, I had moved out and was living with my mom.

SPEAKER_03 13:24

So yeah, we tried to stay away from each other.

SPEAKER_00 13:27

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 13:28

And I'm not gonna lie, it was I don't know if we were still texting every once in a while or what, but it was just like it was just really hard because I was like, uh, this is this sucks.

SPEAKER_00 13:39

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 13:40

So, you know, we ended up making our way back to each other, and December comes around and we graduated, and you had moved out, and then 2008 rolls around.

SPEAKER_02 13:53

Yeah, so you and I were essentially together at this point. I him and I had already started filing for a divorce. I was moved out, spent a lot of time at your place.

SPEAKER_00 14:05

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 14:06

And my divorce was finalized like beginning of February, and we were together. We moved in together that summer. But there was a lot of it was just a really hard time because even though I knew I didn't want to be with him anymore, not only because obviously I wanted to be with you, but because there were so many things in my history with him and I didn't want to be with him, it was still a really hard time. Like going through a divorce is still really hard.

SPEAKER_03 14:35

Oh, I mean, you're a very long chapter.

SPEAKER_02 14:39

Yeah. And I felt horrible about everything. Like I did really feel bad.

SPEAKER_03 14:44

I mean, yeah, you're getting divorced from your husband, but you're also losing a friend. He wasn't. I mean, I would never speak ill of him because I always said like it really sucks that he's so nice. Yeah. Because it's like, oh shit, like, why couldn't he just be an asshole and be like what you're doing is not wrong because he doesn't deserve you anyways. But like, for the reasons you got divorced, like, I I don't want it to be for me. I don't want to break up a marriage like that. And he was always a nice guy.

SPEAKER_02 15:14

Yeah, and it was hard because like I said, we were together since like fifth grade. So essentially we had been through a lot of shit together. Like all that stuff with my dad went down while we were together. You know, he was basically my best friend for a long time. So it's really hard to close that part of your life and like move on to a new one, even if you know it's what's best.

SPEAKER_03 15:37

Yep. And looking back, it's like you just jumped from one relationship into another, especially living with me. Yeah. Like looking back, I'm like, oh, like if one of our kids gets into that kind of situation and be like, uh, hold on. Yeah. Like just hang on a second.

SPEAKER_02 15:55

And that's yeah, a big reason why our relationship continued to be rocky, I think. Because I had even so him and I had broken up at one point, but I still was like clinging on to him, and I never truly took that time to get to know myself, to get to know other people, really, and jumped straight into it with you. So it was kind of the same thing, like automatically in a relationship, didn't take time to be by myself, get to know myself, heal from all the crap that had happened. So we were together, we were living together, and I ended up cheating with another girl. Cause at this point I was really questioning, like. Am I gay? And then also I was going to be teaching, and it kind of dawned on me that, like, oh my god, people are gonna ask me about like you were ashamed. Yeah, it was like I knew people were gonna ask about my significant other, and I was gonna talk about I'd have to say, like, my girlfriend or my wife, or you know, whatever, and that freaked me out.

SPEAKER_03 17:06

Because not only were you divorced now, you were also having your own coming out experience.

SPEAKER_02 17:13

Yes. Like I remember I went to therapy. There was like a therapist training kind of thing where like you go and you get cheaper therapy sessions with like new therapists, and I remember I went in and I just wanted them to tell me what to do, whether or not I was gay. Like and I remember I went. Yes, and I went in, and that is obviously not what happened. And I left and I was like, Well, I'm never going back there again because that was not helpful. And yeah, I mean, looking back now, it's like, well, that was dumb.

SPEAKER_03 17:45

But well, of course, looking back, yeah. Looking back and be like, you guys probably shouldn't live together. And yeah, also Julie should be on your own to explore whatever it is. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 17:55

But instead we call you, but oh god, yeah. Yeah, one you all that got a dog, which then we had to give the dog to your parents for a while because he couldn't live with us. We got in trouble at your apartment.

SPEAKER_03 18:07

Yeah, that was before we moved into our apartment. But looking back on the apartment we lived together in, it is not I don't get happy, happy uh feelings from that because you yeah, you were navigating so many things and I had never been in a relationship before, so this was tainting the fuck out of that. And I'm like, is this normal? Like, I don't understand, like the behaviors you were you were experiencing were similar, I'm assuming, what your ex had been experiencing, but I was on the other side of that. I was the other person. So when you were doing that with someone else, I was like, what is happening? I don't understand.

SPEAKER_02 18:47

Well, and it was partially I really liked the attention that that person was giving me.

SPEAKER_03 18:52

Which is crazy because I was giving you that attention.

SPEAKER_02 18:55

So I was like, What the hell?

SPEAKER_03 18:57

I know, but it was like happening. It was just another girl.

SPEAKER_02 19:01

Yeah, but it was kind of like, oh, like I kind of have these feelings for someone else. Maybe, you know, what does this mean? But so I ended up cheating, not my proudest moment.

SPEAKER_03 19:10

And then I took that as a chance to move back to St. Louis.

SPEAKER_02 19:17

I don't even think that it happened right away. It was we tried to make things work for a little bit, but it was obvious like you had gotten very you needed things from me that I was not giving you. And so you like overcompensated and got very needy.

SPEAKER_03 19:34

Which I am the kind of person who pulls back when that happens, which is hilarious because even more, I think, why it upset me when it did. Like looking back, yes, it all makes sense. But it's like, okay, you're you're pulling away, you know, when you start a relationship, it's hot and heavy, you're doing it all the time, and then we move in together, it's like you start noticing, oh man, like we haven't we haven't had sex in like a week, and like in your early 20s, that's a long time when you go from never having relations with anyone to hot and heavy, and then all of a sudden it like slows way down, and it's only been a couple less than a year. I'm like, what is happening? But because I was overcompensating and you were like, Ew, I don't like that, yet you were getting it from somebody else. It's not like I was pulling away and you're like, What the hell? You know, the classic why men cheat thing, like, oh, my wife doesn't give it to me enough. I was giving you more than what you wanted, and yet you still pulled away. So that's what I think frustrated me the most. But with the whole like me moving, just to preface, like we had talked about moving to St.

SPEAKER_02 20:42

Louis, and you were like Well, because what we were gonna try was being broken up, but living in the same apartment.

SPEAKER_03 20:49

Yeah, we're dumb.

SPEAKER_02 20:50

We were gonna live in different because it was a two-bedroom. Yeah, but that never happened.

SPEAKER_03 20:56

We know people were like, okay, you're broken up now. Is one of you gonna move into the other room? We're like, realistically, how would that even be how would that work? Because we all know, okay, fine, I move into the other bedroom, but at nighttime, what's gonna happen? Somebody's gonna go into somebody's bed, like it's gonna become that classic. Yeah, that's not feasible. We were broken up, but we weren't really broken up. No, and it I mean, we still had a lease, so we were comfortable in the misery of what was. Yeah, it's not like we were going out and like date dating other people.

SPEAKER_02 21:30

I but no, I mean I was like flirting with people at work and yeah, like I definitely wasn't still in a committed mindset at all. But looking back at that apartment, yeah. I also have like a negative I don't like those. The vibe I get from that whole thing is just not to say we weren't like we had some really good times in that apartment, like going out with friends. Like I'm thinking of the night that Tiny was on the toilet and you threw up in the sink. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

I mean yeah, we had some fun times. But overall that whole experience is just negative in my completely agree. Yeah. And you know, it very early twenties, we don't know ourselves. It was very messy, but also a good learning opportunity, part of that growing up thing where you hopefully can let your kids know, like, hey, this is what happened with us, but you know, you do you and learn whatever. But I remember like I really did not want to stay in Springfield forever. I wanted to come back home, live in St. Louis, find a job, like be close to my parents, just live where I grew up.

SPEAKER_02 22:35

Like see, and I feel like for me, I had zero intention on going anywhere else because I was too scared to leave my comfort zone, which was 100%. I grew up in that area, I wanted to stay in that area.

SPEAKER_03 22:49

Mm-hmm. Because we had had that discussion early on, because you were looking for teaching jobs and you know, where do we see ourselves? Blah, blah, blah. So 2008, very, very up and down.

SPEAKER_02 23:00

Like so, at some point you ended up telling me you were gonna move.

SPEAKER_03 23:04

I remember the day.

SPEAKER_02 23:05

I think you'd had a conversation with your mom.

SPEAKER_03 23:08

I had a conversation with my mom because I think I might have been naive to the fact that you were still talking to what's her face and just living your life and whatever. Like, I don't think you were actively like doing anything with people, but it was becoming very, very sloppy. And I was like, I like no, this is I'm a people pleaser, but this is probably one of the first times in my life that I was like, you know what? I deserve better for me. And as much as this is gonna suck, yeah, I am gonna do this for me. And I called my mom and said, if I need a place to stay temporarily, can I move back in with you and dad? And there was no hesitation. This is where my mom has always come through for me. She said, sure. Like, what are you gonna have a job when you move up here? Whatever. The second phone call I made was to the manager of Sam's here and said, Hey, I work at Sam's down in Springfield, but I am moving back quite quickly. Do you have a spot for me there? And it it just so happened to work out that I was able to transfer. And I remember I came back inside and I just looked at you. You were on the couch and I said, So I'm moving to St. Louis, back to St. Louis. And you're like, uh, did you just figure this all out outside? I was like, Yeah, I'm living with my parents and I'm transferring to work. And you were a little shocked, but also like not shocked at the same time, just because it's like, why would you stay here? I'm not, yeah, you're staying here. I was staying there for you.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

I mean, at this point, we there were no clear boundaries. It was no, we needed to be separate. We're together, but we're not really together. So it's like, can I go off and do my own thing? But not really, because like I still have to answer to you. Like, I remember I went to hang out with the guy that I worked with at Walmart one time. Like, I went to his place and hung out for a little bit, and it was like, I didn't tell you about it because it was like technically we're not together. We're supposed to be broken up, but like we're still kind of together. So it was like, yeah, neither one of us had those clear boundaries to like move on with our lives.

SPEAKER_03 25:13

What was I gonna do? I didn't have any other prospects. I was still newly out, and I wasn't interested, and I couldn't be in the same little city, even though Springfield is huge. I did not want to stay down there. I did not want my own apartment down there. The gay community at that time down there was so small. So anything that was gonna go down, we both were gonna hear about it. Well, we were both gonna see each other. And I I had such a desire to move out of Springfield and back to St. Louis, whether it was gonna be my permanent landing space or not, I knew I didn't want to stay in Springfield.

SPEAKER_01 25:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:46

And I stayed there for you. And because I didn't know what else to do, and I took that as a sign of here's your door. It's open right now, but it might not be for very long. So I was like, you know what, fuck it. I'm doing it. And not gonna lie, moving day was probably the hardest day of my life.

SPEAKER_02 26:05

Oh, I was miserable. I remember I think we just cried the whole day. I remember I called in sick to all the things and I just like laid. I uh you took the bed, so I had like an air mattress, and I just like laid on the air mattress and cried.

SPEAKER_03 26:19

But I remember I drove, I had to drive by myself because my parents, I think, came down and packed up their car too, and I pretty much cried the whole way. You were texting me telling me that you were still on the floor, you hadn't gotten up, whatever. I'm like, why is she so upset? She wanted this, and you know, it's just just shows you like how complicated things can be, and it's like, yeah, I didn't just like magically like fall out of love. Granted, people are probably like, oh my god, this hasn't even been like a full year, or it was like a full year.

SPEAKER_02 26:51

Barely. Yeah, wait. So it okay, no, we moved in June. So then we were moving up in next June. So we've been together like a year and a half.

SPEAKER_03 26:59

It was a year and a half. But it wasn't like a perfect relationship from this like you know what I mean? I don't know. I just remember the whole car right now was miserable. I was by myself, balling the eyes out, whatever. And then I get home and I I like just could not stop crying. Like I couldn't get a grip on things. And my mom told me, Your cousins are coming over to help you move your stuff in. You need to like pull yourself together and stop crying for like a couple hours. And I was like, Okay. And I remember there was one night not too long after I moved where I was like, I had like a breakdown. I was like, Mom, I need I need to go back. I this I'm I feel like I'm dying inside. Like my heart was so broken. And she's like, sleep on it. You're not going anywhere right now, it's nighttime, and you're all upset, whatever. She's like, that's not good for anybody. And I slept on it, and it was just like, okay, take a breath. Because first relationship, first breakup. Yeah. I was like, I literally feel like I'm dying in my heart right now, like ripping open. She was like, Yeah, why they call it a breakup? Thank goodness for your mom.

SPEAKER_02 28:08

Because if you would have come back, it was rocky enough. I don't think even you still living there, it would have been worse if you came back. That was one of those moments where it was like, okay. Because I don't mom's right. Yeah, I don't think we would have been strong enough to stay away from each other.

SPEAKER_03 28:22

No, absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 28:23

I mean, we still weren't three hours ago. No, no, three hours away. Yeah. So, okay. So we'll call that part one of us getting together. The very rocky beginning part of the thing.

SPEAKER_03 28:34

I'm just like, oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 28:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:36

It's very how did we make it out of that?

SPEAKER_02 28:38

I have no idea. And on part two, we will pick up with what happened after you moved to St. Louis. So that wraps up. Happier times.

SPEAKER_03 28:46

Yes. Little Rocky, but happier times.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

So as always, find us on Instagram, the stories we leave you, and follow the show. Give us a like. And if you like what you're hearing, share it with a friend. Help us reach some more people who need to hear the story.

SPEAKER_03 29:00

Sharing is caring. Be kind, rewind.

SPEAKER_02 29:02

Otherwise, until next episode. Okay, bye. Bye.