The Stories Behind the Stories: Lisa

SHOW NOTES

The Stories Behind the Stories Episode Lisa

Sometimes someone shares a story. 

And they never know what it unlocks. 

In someone else. 

Years of feeling invisible.

Thirty seconds that changed everything. 

And a story that had been waiting to be told. 

That's what this episode is about.

I wrote Lisa because networking is one of the most universal pain points in professional life. And one of the most misunderstood. People assume networking favours those who are naturally outgoing. Who are comfortable with small talk. Who enjoy talking about themselves. Lisa's story shows that's not what networking is about at all. I wrote Lisa for everyone who has ever left a room feeling invisible.

In this episode of The Stories Behind the Stories, I go deeper into the failure, success and passion stories behind the character — and into the real pattern I was observing when I wrote her.

RESOURCES 

How to Build Authentic Connections Through Storytelling

The Programme Behind the Story: The Art of WorkLife Storytelling: Creating Three Fundamental Stories That Define Your Identity

Your Three Stories Takeaway

Before you go — something to take with you.

Your Passion Story. 

What belief shapes how you show up in professional situations?

Your Failure Story. 

What professional situation have you been leaving early — or avoiding entirely? 

Your Success Story. 

When did sharing something real about your work create genuine connection?

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Transcript

Speaker 0:08

Sometimes someone shares a story and they never know what it unlocks in someone else, years of feeling invisible, 30 seconds that changed everything, and a story that had been waiting to be told. That's what this episode is about. Hello, it's Carmel from School of Work Life. Welcome to The Stories Behind Your Stories, where I go deeper into the work-life stories I've crafted, the thinking behind the ideas, the experiences that shape that thinking, the lessons learned from those experiences. Today's episode is Lisa. Her story is featured in the episode How to Build Authentic Connections Through Storytelling. In the last episode, I went deeper into James's three stories. Today I want to go deeper into Lisa's failure, success, and passion stories. Together they reveal something that no single story could show alone. Who she is professionally, what shaped her, and what drives her. The story behind the stories, thirty seconds to be seen. People don't connect with credentials, they connect with thinking. Lisa used to leave every networking event feeling invisible, not because she lacked expertise, not because she lacked commitment, but because she was describing what she did, not who she was. What do you do? She answered it accurately, professionally, and completely forgettably. I wrote Lisa because networking is one of the most universal pain points in professional life and one of the most misunderstood. People assume networking favors those who are naturally outgoing, who are comfortable with small talk, who enjoy talking about themselves. Lisa's story shows that's not what networking is about at all. I wrote Lisa for everyone who has ever left a room feeling invisible, and I wrote it for myself. Because networking the way I believed it had to be approached isn't me. I'm not good at small talk. I never know what to say. I'm reflective. I need to think things through. I don't like talking about myself. That's the part I find really hard. But Lisa showed me that's not what networking has to be. The failure at the heart of Lisa's story isn't dramatic. It's thirty seconds long. She describes what she does accurately, professionally, and the conversation dies every time, for so long that she starts to believe that networking simply isn't for people like her. Here's what I think was behind that. Lisa was describing her job, not herself. There's a difference between telling someone what you do and showing them how you think. Credentials tell people what category you fit into. Stories show them who you actually are. Lisa had been fitting herself into a category for years and wondering why no one could see her. What's this failure cost? Isn't just professional, it's personal. When you leave room after room feeling unseen, you start to internalize it. You tell yourself networking simply isn't for people like you, that you don't have the right personality, the right energy, the right way of presenting yourself. I've seen this in people I've worked with, and I felt it myself. The problem was never the person. It was always a story we were telling, or rather the story we weren't. The untold story isn't always hidden. Sometimes it's just unrecognized. Lisa knew what happened in Manchester. She just didn't know how it was the most important thing she had to say until she heard her own story in someone else's words. That's what I did for the people in Ireland, what Sarah did for James, what the Edinburgh consultant did for Lisa. Lisa's success story begins not with what she says, but with what she hears. A consultant on a panel at the Clean Energy Forum shares a story about a hotel chain, not his credentials, not his results, a story about what he got wrong first and what he understood when he looked more carefully. Lisa feels a jolt of recognition because she has lived exactly that story with a different client in a different industry, but the same insight, and she has never shared it. The reframe Lisa offers, the Manchester factory owner, is the heart of her story. Your grandfather was already a sustainability pioneer. He just didn't have the language for it. One sentence, it transforms resistance into championship, not because the facts changed, because the story changed. And that's the methodology in a single moment. The right story told in the right way doesn't just communicate, it changes what's possible. Lisa's passion story is perhaps the clearest of the three. She believes sustainability works best when it honors what already exists, not imposing change, building on what's already there. And underneath that professional belief is something more personal. The same conviction runs through everything she does. Find what's already working, build from there. Never ask someone to abandon who they are. That's not just a sustainability philosophy. That's a way of working with people. I recognize Lisa's passion because it's mine. Find what's already there, build from that. Never ask someone to abandon who they are. That's not just how Lisa worked. It's how I built School of Work Life. And that's just the beginning. The 30 seconds that used to end everything, now opened everything, and something shifts. Not just understanding trust in one conversation, rather than months of careful relationship building. That's what the three stories do when they're shared authentically. They create the conditions for genuine professional partnership. When you understand someone else's three stories, you know immediately whether you share the same values, whether you're thinking is complementary, whether you could work together. No performance needed, no months of careful trust building, just the trust and truth of who someone is professionally. That's what Lisa discovers, and that's what I want for everyone who does this work. What I hope you take from Lisa beyond the framework, beyond the networking advice is something simpler. The conversations you dread most are rarely about what you think they're about. Networking isn't about small talk. It's not about selling yourself. It's not about being outgoing or charismatic. It's about finding the right story and trusting that when you share how you actually think, the failures that shaped you, the successes that revealed you, the passion that drives you, the right people will recognize you. Lisa is every professional who has left a room feeling invisible, not because they had nothing to offer, but because they hadn't yet found a story that showed who they were until they found what was already there. From my notebook on Lisa, I wrote Lisa second. James was a natural first story. Interviews are the moment when the gap between credentials and identity become most visible and most costly. Lisa was a natural second because networking is the moment when that same gap shows up differently. Not in a formal room with a job at stake, in a hallway, at a coffee station in thirty seconds. The stakes feel lower, but the cost of getting it wrong accumulates quietly over years, feeling invisible at event after event, assuming their problem is you, and the problem is simply the story you haven't been telling. On networking, networking is the professional situation people dread most and misunderstand most. The advice is always the same be more outgoing, work the room, perfect your elevator pitch. None of that is what Lisa's story is about. What changed for Lisa wasn't her personality, it was her story. That's the distinction that matters. On the three stories across context, James showed the three stories in an interview room. Lisa showed them at a networking event. Same three stories, different context. That's the point. The three stories aren't a technique for one situation. They're a way of understanding and communicating who you are professionally in every situation that matters. On the Edinburgh Consultant, the Edinburgh consultant never knew what he did for Lisa. He shared his story honestly, without knowing it, would unlock someone else's, not just his failure, his success and his passion, all three. That's something I think about a lot. We share our stories and we can't see where they go, who they reach, what they open up. The Edinburgh Consultant shared all three. The failure opened the door. The success showed the way through. The passion made it worth walking, and together they unlocked everything Lisa had been carrying. That's the ripple we can't predict, the one that starts before we even know it's begun. On the door in Lisa's story, the door in is a failure story with thirty seconds of invisible conversation that finally broke open into something real. But it's interesting. The trigger for that opening wasn't Lisa telling her failure story first. It was hearing someone else still theirs. Sometimes the door opens from the outside. Someone else's story creates a condition for yours. Your three stories before you go, something to take with you. Your passion story, what belief shapes how you've shown up in professional situations? Your failure story, what professional situation have you been leaving early or avoiding entirely? Your success story, when did sharing something real about your work create genuine connection? In the next episode, I'll go deeper into David's failure, success, and passion stories from the episode How to Turn Invisible Expertise into Strategic Influence through storytelling to take you inside the story behind a story. Thank you for listening.